3.4 Example of a summary question
Study tip
You should focus on only including points that are directly relevant to the subject of the summary
and pay close attention to the wording of the task.
The question asks for a summary of what the writer saw from his flight and not what he saw
during it. For this reason, it is not necessary to include Lars and his wife in your answer.
Similarly, much of the third paragraph is not relevant as it is background information about the
effects of climate change and not what the writer saw and thought during the flight (apart from
his reference to the apricot orchards).
In the list of points in the Example response on page 40 (which is similar to
those that might appear in an examination mark scheme) some words have been
underlined. This indicates that the words are essential for the point to be credited.
Other words are placed within brackets, indicating that these details are not
necessarily required.
You will notice that the points that have been highlighted do not fall neatly into
two groups. It is, therefore, important that you reorganise them so that you have
two sets of points relating to the two prongs of the question. You can then attempt
to turn them into two paragraphs (one for what the writer saw and the other for his
thoughts and feelings), and develop them into clear sentences.
Manipulating and rearranging the details in your notes like this is a way of using
your own words and showing that you have clearly understood the passage that you
are summarising.
Example response: Final written summary
At first, the writer saw the mountain, Erciyes Dagi, towering above the flat
tables of rock and the high cliffs, and pillars of rock that rose from them. He saw
the bright sun which allowed him a clear view of fields and orchards covered by a
blanket of fresh snow. From 2400 metres the writer’s view of the ground became
less distinct but he could see for a far greater distance, all the way from the
Taurus Mountains to the Anatolian Plateau.
The writer was very excited about his flight, especially as visibility conditions
were perfect. They took off at sunrise when he felt very cold at first but this did
not prevent him from appreciating the magnificent ride. Being able to see the
whole spread of the landscape from the air made it easier for him to understand
its formation, and the overview of the apricot trees helped him to appreciate how
much farming in the area was threatened by climate change, especially by the
cold frosts of winter. (170 words)
Reviewing what you have learnt
Now that you have worked your way through the example of how to produce a
summary response, check back through the advice in the first half of this unit and
then compare how effectively the final summary about the balloon flight makes use
of this advice.
41
3 Summary questions
Key terms 3.5 Style matters
Written expression: In many summary questions, in addition to marks being awarded for the selection of
This means not only the correct points, such as those listed on page 40, further marks may be available
how accurately you for written expression.
have expressed
yourself in writing, It is, therefore, important that you take care with the quality of your writing, as
but also involves well as the content. Guidance as to what is good summary style is outlined below.
a consideration of
how effectively and The following points should be followed very carefully; they contain some
logically you have important advice.
organised the points
that you make. » Concision of expression is something which typifies the very best summaries. This
Concision: can be achieved by making sure that you focus clearly on only the points stated
Expressing in the wording of the question.
information
clearly and » One way of doing this is to make sure that you don’t include any irrelevant
comprehensively comments; a generalised introductory paragraph is not necessary and simply uses
using as few words up unnecessary words.
as possible.
Objective: An » Lifting (or quoting) whole phrases or sentences from the original does not give a
objective tone is one clear indication that you have understood the text.
which is neutral and
not influenced by » A summary should be written using an objective, impersonal register; there is
personal feelings. no need to comment or to write in the first person – even if that is the way in
Impersonal: Has which the original has been written.
a meaning similar
to ‘objective’ – a » Note that the copying of chunks of material directly from the passage is not
neutral tone not acceptable summary technique – this is because copying the text does not prove
influenced by that you have understood it. It is important that what you write shows that you
personal feelings. have understood the text and can interpret what you have read.
Register: The form
of language used by Exercise 5
a speaker or writer
in a particular Compare the original version of ‘Balloon Flight’ (that written by the author) with
social context – the final summary version.
depending on the
audience, register 1 Make notes in which you identify details from the original which have been
may be either omitted from the summary and say why they have not been included.
formal or informal.
2 Identify examples of where own words have been used by the writer of the
summary and say whether you think they have in any way changed the meaning
of the original.
3 Compare the language used by the writer of the original passage and the writer
of the summary – can you find examples of an informal register in the original
being expressed more formally in the summary?
3.6 Practise your skills
The following exercises can be used to practise your summary writing skills.
42
3.6 Practise your skills
Exercise 6
Read the passage ‘A land of fire’ and then write a summary of what you have learnt
about the volcanoes on Hawaii and the effects of volcanoes on the Hawaiian islands.
You must use continuous writing (not note form) and use your own words as far as
possible.
Your summary should be between 120 and 150 words.
A Teacher tip
Remember, the summary is asking for information about volcanoes and their effect on the
Hawaiian islands. The passage, however, is written by the writer using the first person ‘I’. In your
answer it is important that you focus primarily on the information the writer gives. You should,
therefore, adopt an impersonal tone and not write as if you are the writer himself. You could start
your answer, ‘Volcanoes on Hawaii are…’
land of fire
The volcano’s power to destroy and
If you go to Hawaii expecting As the director of Hawaii Volcanoes create at random is awesome. New
something extraordinary, and are National Park assured me, ‘It’s alive. It land is added day by day. A new beach
prepared to look beyond Honolulu changes. Every day there’s something of jet-black sand was created overnight
and Waikiki Beach, it can be found. new.’ in January 1988, after an eruption out
On any of the islands you come upon at sea. There it was the next morning;
landscapes of quite stunning beauty, We were at the crater of Kilauea three km long, utterly pristine.
but what really blew me away – almost volcano, about 2,100 metres above sea
literally – was the primeval power of level but another 2,100 metres below Whole towns have been engulfed; no
the volcanoes of Hawaii itself. the summit of the giant volcano one is sure where they are buried, as
Mauna Loa. Mark Twain, the 19th- there is nowhere for the surveyors to
Each of the Hawaiian islands has been century American writer, described the get their bearings. There are no towns
thrust 6,100 metres up from the ocean crater of Kilauea as a dazzling lake of left on the southern coast. The
floor by the successive eruptions of fire; I was hiding my disappointment Hawaiians abandoned their villages
submarine volcanoes. As each island at finding it a desert. ‘But you’re so 150 years ago after a succession of
in turn drifts away from the ‘hotspot’ lucky,’ said the park director, ‘you’re terrible tidal waves.
on the sea bed, its volcano dies and it here at exactly the right time to see
sinks back into the sea. Hawaii Island something Mark Twain would have I parked my car where the Chain of
itself is the newest of them all, with given anything to see – the volcano is Craters road runs into a solid wall of
two active volcanoes of over 4000 erupting right into the ocean. You can lava. A ranger handed me a ‘reassuring’
metres, and it is still growing. hike out there and watch it as it leaflet saying new lava is unstable and
happens.’ may collapse at any time, and it is best
to avoid the clouds of hydrochloric
acid. I set off towards the distant
columns of steam that marked the
hotspot. There is no path; you just pick
your way through broken slabs and
steam hissing from gashes in the rock.
The surface of the rock is so rough that
a simple fall can shred your skin.
Source: Travel Writing edited by Geoff Barton, Oxford Literary Resources (OUP), 2004
43
3 Summary questions
Exercise 7
Re-read from paragraph 1 (‘If you go to…’) to paragraph 6 (‘...tidal waves.’). Write
a summary of what you learn about volcanoes and their effects on the Hawaiian
islands. Write a paragraph of about 50–70 words.
Exercise 8
Read carefully the following article and then summarise:
• what you learn about ancient Pompeii
• the work of archaeologists after the remains of the city were discovered
• the display in the National Museum of Singapore.
You should write between 150 and 180 words.
Pompeii exhibition opens
at the National Museum
of Singapore
The National Museum of Singapore transports the final moments of life in this once-thriving
visitors back 2000 years in time to experience life seaport. The exhibition features more than 250
and death in the ancient Roman Empire. A new artefacts uncovered from beneath 10 metres of
exhibition, Pompeii: Life in a Roman Village CE volcanic material in this once-cosmopolitan city.
79 reveals daily life in a city steeped in legend The exhibition brings these priceless artefacts,
and mystery. along with body casts of eight of the victims of
Vesuvius’ fury, to Singapore.
Pompeii and its neighbouring cities were buried
– and frozen in time – after the fateful eruption Many of the artefacts have never been on public
of Mt. Vesuvius on August 24, CE 79. After display before 2007, including a stunning large-
being forgotten for nearly 1700 years, the city scale garden fresco, gold coins, jewellery, marble
was accidentally rediscovered by well-digging and bronze statuary, and other dazzling examples
shepherds in 1748. Since then, its excavation has of ancient Rome’s artistry and craftsmanship.
yielded extraordinary artefacts — from beds,
lanterns, hairpins to an exquisitely preserved 5-
metre-long garden fresco from the House of the
Gold Bracelet – and provided a comprehensive
portrait of the life of a city at the height of the
Roman Empire.
Amazingly, archaeologists have also been able to
piece together the final moments of the people
of Pompeii. By pouring plaster into cavities
in the volcanic ash left by the victims’ bodies,
archaeologists were able to create moulds of
44
3.6 Practise your skills
The exhibition takes visitors through an average The showpieces of the exhibition are the body
day in Pompeii; visitors walk a Pompeian street casts, made from the cavities left in the ash
complete with storefronts and ambient sound, after the bodies of those buried decomposed.
see samples of food items carbonized by the These figures are caught in their last moments,
eruption, explore a home and garden setting shielding their faces, clinging to each other. Even
from Pompeii, and see how the people of Pompeii an animal impression was preserved.
expressed their spirituality.
Source: Archaeology News Network,
Art Daily, 18 October 2010
Unit summary
In this unit you have reviewed the objectives:
• demonstrate understanding of explicit meanings
• demonstrate understanding of implicit meanings and attitudes
• select and use information for specific purposes
• organise and structure ideas and opinions for deliberate effect
• use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures appropriate to context
• make accurate use of spelling, punctuation and grammar.
45
4 Becoming a better writer
In this unit you will:
H articulate experience and express what is thought, felt and imagined
H organise and structure ideas and opinions for deliberate effect
H use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures appropriate to context
H use register appropriate to context
H make accurate use of spelling, punctuation and grammar.
This unit will focus on the following skills:
Writing
H express what is thought, felt and imagined
H organise and convey facts, ideas and opinions effectively
H demonstrate a varied vocabulary appropriate to the context
H demonstrate an effective use of sentence structures
H demonstrate an understanding of audience, purpose and form
H demonstrate accuracy in spelling, punctuation and grammar.
46
Introduction
Introduction
This unit gives you some key guidelines and principles about writing which are
relevant to any kind of writing task. Whatever piece of writing you try, you need to
think about its purpose and decide what effect this has on your writing style. There
are two key questions to ask yourself:
» What is it for? In other words, what kind of writing piece is it (it could be
anything from a fantasy story to a business letter) and what do you want to say?
You need to be able to use different styles for different purposes.
» Whom is it for? Whom are the readers for this piece of writing? You need to be
able to use different styles for different audiences.
Even when we think about just one kind of writing task – a letter – the style will
need to be different depending on whom the letter is for (a relative? a newspaper? a
friend?). When you write an article you need to think about your readers: if it is for
a group of young people, for instance, you need to think about how to make it clear
and interesting for them, not just about what information you want to include.
In this unit we will be looking at the three main types of writing that you will
come across in your studies. They are:
» Writing to inform or explain.
» Writing to argue or persuade.
» Writing imaginatively to entertain your readers.
Key terms 4.1 Different styles for different purposes
Factual: A factual Writing to inform or explain
piece of writing
contains details that Writing to inform or explain is writing which is factual. It is important that factual
can be proved to be writing is as clear as possible, whether you are explaining a situation, an activity
true. or an interest, or providing some instructions for carrying out a task. Make sure your
Factual writing: writing is focused and objective, clear and systematic.
Writing which
explains or gives Be focused and objective
information in a
straightforward, Your purpose is to make the information clear to your readers, not to give them your
unbiased way, not own opinion on the subject, so stick closely to the subject and don’t be tempted to
influenced by the add comments of your own.
personal opinions of
the writer. Be clear and systematic
The point of an explanation is that it should be simpler and clearer than the
original. Here are some techniques to help you achieve this.
» Use vocabulary that is easy to understand.
» If you are answering a directed writing extended response to reading question, be
careful not just to repeat chunks of the original text; instead, find simpler ways
to express the same ideas so that you are genuinely explaining them.
» Use sentences that are not too long or complicated.
» Make sure your punctuation is accurate and helpful so that readers can easily see
their way from one point to the next.
» Use a new paragraph for every main point that you make: start the paragraph
with a ‘topic sentence’ to tell your reader what the paragraph will be about and
use the rest of the paragraph to develop the point.
47
4 Becoming a better writer
Exercise 1
Write directions (for a stranger to your area) for how to walk from your school main
entrance to a specific building (e.g. a library, police station, etc.) in the vicinity.
When you have written the instructions, give them to a partner who should play
the part of a visitor to the school and check how well they can be followed.
Example of an informative text
The riddle of the Nile
The article is giving As far back as the second remotest central African sources to the By introducing
information about century BCE, many had sought Mediterranean, and the Blue Nile, which two of the better-
the discovery of the to solve the question of the rises high up on the Ethiopian plateau known explorers
Nile; these opening source of the River Nile. But and flows for 2,300 km. this next paragraph
paragraphs contain a it was not until the middle allows the readers
general historical survey of the 19th century that this The two parts then join at Khartoum, to relate to
to set the subsequent geographical mystery was by which time the White Nile has something in their
details in a particular solved and revealed its secrets flowed some 4,020 km. To natives of this own knowledge.
context. to a hugely courageous group vast area the river possessed magical It also gives
of intrepid British adventurers qualities. Some felt it was god-like and important factual
who beat a remarkable path even feared its wrath. But European details about the
in Africa. Between 1856 and explorers faced more gruelling horrors Nile.
1876 these explorers became than mere native superstition. They
national heroes as stirring were forced to persevere in the face of The reference
accounts emerged of their treacherous rainy season quagmires and to penicillin
journeys into the heart of deadly disease for which, in those pre- (something with
Africa. These expeditions fired the penicillin days, there was no cure. which 21st-
Victorian imagination. century readers
One noted explorer, John Hanning Speke, are very familiar)
Now a book, Explorers of the Nile, by gave a graphic account of being ‘invaded’ again gives the
historian Tim Jeal, gives a detailed in his tent by a host of small black readers important
account of these forays in search of the beetles – one of which rushed into his contextual
Nile’s source. The object of the quest had ear. ‘One of the horrid little insects,’ he information about
been the planet’s most elusive secret. 19th-century life.
Alexander The Great is said to have
asked about the Nile and a proverb grew
up over the centuries. Dreamers of the
impossible were often told: ‘It would be
easier to find the source of the Nile’.
The huge challenge, however, fired the
imagination of these individualistic and
aggressive explorers – among them David
Livingstone and Henry Stanley – and
they set out to fill in one of the blanks
on the world’s maps. It was a formidable
challenge. The world’s longest river has
two main branches – the White Nile,
which flows 6,800 km from its
48
4.1 Different styles for different purposes
In this paragraph, wrote, ‘struggled up the narrow channel was eventually named as the source of This article is mainly
the article moves on (of the ear) until he got arrested by the Nile. But it was impossible to prove informative in purpose,
to introducing and want of passage room. This impediment this at the time because much of the but read carefully
giving information evidently enraged him for he began with expedition’s survey equipment had been through the final four
about one of the exceeding vigour, like a rabbit at a hole, lost and vitally important technical paragraphs and make
main characters to dig violently away.’ Speke was forced to questions about the height and extent of notes of both the facts
involved in exploring gouge out the beetle using a knife which the lake could not be answered. they contain and also of
the Nile. It is given led to his face and shoulder swelling up. the opinions given by
credibility by being He also lost his hearing in that ear. Speke returned to England without the writer.
expressed in his own Burton and was quick to make a speech
words. The men were also forced to endure to the Royal Geographical Society in
malaria and flesh-eating ulcers as well which he claimed to have discovered
This paragraph as stab and spear wounds inflicted by the source of the Nile. Burton, who later
attributes a reason natives in revolt. But what partly drew returned, was infuriated by Speke’s
for their motivation British explorers to central Africa was announcement. He accused his former
to the explorers. more their hunger for fame (and fortune) friend of breaking the promise to speak
Overall this is an than any simple thirst for adventure. together. Speke returned to Lake Victoria
informative article, in 1862 and found the Nile flowing out of
but do you think Among the most charismatic was Sir it. He then sailed along the river until he
this statement is a Richard Burton, already well-known met up with other explorers. Reaching
fact or the writer’s for his travels in Asia, Africa and the Khartoum, he sent a telegram to London:
opinion? Americas. He had an extraordinary ‘The Nile is settled.’
knowledge of languages (he spoke 29
Now the second European, African and Asian ones) and This enraged Burton, who claimed Speke
major figure is excited public interest by travelling had not followed the Nile from the point
introduced with disguised as a native Arab in Mecca. it flowed from Lake Victoria. A debate on
some details the matter was arranged by the British
about his life and In 1856 Speke and Burton joined forces Association in Bath for September 18,
personality. and set off for East Africa to find the 1864. But that morning Speke died from
Great Lakes which were rumoured to a self-inflicted gunshot wound while out
Factual details about exist in the centre of the continent. hunting at Neston Park, Wiltshire. An
Speke and Burton’s Both men hoped the expedition would inquest concluded that it was accidental
exploration begin eventually locate the source of the Nile. but some thought it was suicide. Despite
here and continue They became the first Europeans to evidence that it was clearly an accident,
for the remainder of discover Lake Tanganyika (although the Burton soon declared that Speke had
the article. hapless Speke had gone temporarily blind committed suicide to avoid ‘the exposure
and could not see it). of his misstatements in regard to the Nile
sources’.
They were told of a second lake in the
area but Burton, himself now sick, was Source: www.express.co.uk/
left behind and a shaky Speke had to go expressyourself/270144/How-the-source-of-
alone. He found the magnificent body the-Nile-was-finally-uncovered
of water and named it Lake Victoria. It
Exercise 2
1 From paragraphs 1 and 2, give two statements made by the writer that tell you
that the source of the Nile had intrigued people for over 2000 years.
2 Explain, in your own words, what the writer means by describing Livingstone
and Stanley as ‘individualistic and aggressive explorers’ (paragraph 3).
49
4 Becoming a better writer
3 How did Speke deal with the beetle that entered his ear, and what was the
result of this episode?
4 Explain, using your own words, what the writer means by the final sentence of
paragraph 6 (’But what partly … thirst for adventure’.).
5 The writer describes Sir Richard Burton as ‘charismatic’. Explain how other
details from paragraph 7 justify this description of him.
6 According to paragraph 9, why was it not possible for Speke to prove that Lake
Victoria was the source of the Nile?
7 Explain, using your own words, the reasons for the bad feeling between Speke
and Burton and the final outcome of their feud.
8 Identify a word or phrase from paragraphs 1–6 (‘As far back as … thirst for
adventure’.) which suggests the same idea as the words underlined:
(a) When our youth group went on its activities weekend, Nazir showed that he
was a particularly bold and adventurous rock climber.
(b) Over a thousand years ago, the Vikings made many swift raids on the coast
of England.
(c) Although the cat tried very hard, the mouse proved to be very difficult to
catch.
9 Using your own words, explain what the writer means by each of the words
underlined:
To natives of this vast area the river possessed magical qualities. Some felt it was
god-like and even feared its wrath. But European explorers faced more gruelling
horrors than mere native superstition. They were forced to persevere in the face of
treacherous rainy season quagmires and deadly disease for which, in those pre-
penicillin days, there was no cure.
(a) wrath
(b) persevere
(c) quagmires.
10 Using your own words, explain how the phrases underlined are used by the
writer to suggest the challenges and hardships faced by the explorers.
To natives of this vast area the river possessed magical qualities. Some felt it was
god-like and even feared its wrath. But European explorers faced more gruelling
horrors than mere native superstition. They were forced to persevere in the face of
treacherous rainy season quagmires and deadly disease for which, in those pre-
penicillin days, there was no cure.
4.2 Writing to argue or persuade
This kind of writing needs to be convincing and logical. Here are some useful
techniques.
» Decide what you want to persuade your reader to believe. Which viewpoint are
you going to put forward?
» Make ‘for and against’ lists: one list of the facts and ideas from the text that
support your viewpoint, and another list of those which do not. Note: You can
change your chosen viewpoint at this planning stage, but don’t change it as you
are writing!
» State your chosen viewpoint simply at the beginning.
» For each main point that you make to support your viewpoint, give evidence and
examples to back up your case – use the text!
50
4.2 Writing to argue or persuade
Key term » Be balanced – your argument will be most convincing if you make points for both
sides but prove that your own chosen viewpoint is the better one. Use your ‘for
Rhetorical and against’ lists.
questions:
Rhetorical » Use paragraphs to help you make your points clearly. Start a new paragraph for
questions are each main point that you make and use the rest of the paragraph to give your
questions used by a evidence. This will mean that your paragraphs are of roughly similar lengths.
speaker or writer in
order to emphasise » Use persuasive phrases such as: ‘It seems clear to me that …’, ‘The text shows
a point, rather that ...’, ‘This example indicates that …’.
than requiring a
specific answer. For » Use linking phrases to move between the two sides of the argument, such as:
example: Is there ‘Nevertheless …’, ‘On the other hand …’.
anyone present
today who wouldn’t » Rhetorical questions are a good way to get your reader on your side: these are
welcome an extra questions which have an obvious answer, and the answer supports your point of
week’s holiday? view! For example, if you were arguing against animal experiments, you could ask:
‘Would you like your own pets to have shampoo squirted into their eyes?’ If you
were arguing in favour of animal experiments, you could ask: ‘Your little brother is
dangerously ill – would you rather he had drugs whose safety had been tested on
animals, or no drugs?’
» Finish by restating your viewpoint, perhaps saying also that although you can see
the other point of view, you are convinced that yours is the right one.
Exercise 3
The passage that follows is the conclusion of a speech given by the English
Suffragette Emmeline Pankhurst, in Hartford, Connecticut on 13 November 1913.
In this speech, she speaks strongly for the rights of women to be allowed to vote.
Read through the passage and make notes of how well you think it uses the advice
given above on writing to persuade. Compare your notes with your partner’s and
discuss the points you have each made.
Now, I want to say to you who you decided to emancipate the won’t do it ourselves, but we will
think women cannot succeed, negro. You have left it to women put the enemy in the position
we have brought the government in your land, the men of all where they will have to choose
of England to this position, that civilised countries have left it between giving us freedom or
it has to face this alternative: to women, to work out their giving us death.
either women are to be killed or own salvation. That is the way
women are to have the vote. I ask in which we women of England So here am I. I come in the
American men in this meeting, are doing it. Human life for us is intervals of prison appearance.
what would you say if in your sacred, but we say if any life is to I come after having been four
state you were faced with that be sacrificed it shall be ours; we times imprisoned under the
alternative, that you must either ‘Cat and Mouse Act’, probably
kill them or give them their going back to be rearrested as
citizenship? Well, there is only soon as I set my foot on British
one answer to that alternative, soil. I come to ask you to help to
there is only one way out – you win this fight. If we win it, this
must give those women the vote. hardest of all fights, then, to be
sure, in the future it is going to be
You won your freedom in America made easier for women all over
when you had the revolution, by the world to win their fight when
bloodshed, by sacrificing human their time comes.
life. You won the civil war by
the sacrifice of human life when Source: www.theguardian.com/
theguardian/2007/apr/27/
greatspeeches
51
4 Becoming a better writer
The title the Example of persuasive writing
writer gives to this
argumentative Read the following article and then answer the questions that follow.
article makes his
viewpoint quite Negative impact of tourism on
clear. the environment
The writer starts his By Kimpee Olivar on Tuesday, Jun 28th, 2016
article quite gently to
gain the confidence Traveling is one of the favourite activities of people Coral bleaching is one of the consequences The argument
of his readers – around the world, especially the millennials, but of the harmful effect humans have on the has moved on to
‘sometimes it can…’. sometimes it can have a harmful effect on the environment. tourists causing
environment. air pollution. The
This paragraph The air pollution coming from tourist transportation writer, however,
begins with Tourism may positively impact on one’s country or is one of the major negative effects of tourism. introduces some
a positive city in terms of economic advantages, employment Traveling by rail, air, and road results in air pollution positive advice to
statement about opportunities, foreign exchange earnings, and that damages the environment. Apparently, a tourists here, which
the advantages growth in the service sector. However, it may also large portion of air emissions is caused by 60% helps to alleviate
of tourism to put pressure on the environment, especially when of air travel from tourists going from one place to the critical tone and
many countries, there’s a huge number of visitors in regions where another. Additionally, transport emissions can result is a good way of
but develops to the resources are already inadequate. in photochemical pollution, acid rain and global keeping readers on
suggest that there warming. his side.
are also negative In fact, unrestrained traditional tourism has possible
aspects (which are threats for a lot of natural resources from across Campervans and car rentals are popular travel
developed with the globe. It can lead to a lot of major problems that transportation in countries like Australia and New
examples over the could totally harm the environment, such as natural Zealand and are one of the leading causes of
following three habitat loss, increased pollution, soil erosion, and air pollution. Some campervan hire companies
paragraphs). more. It will never be a great idea to exceed limits in these countries are going for environmentally
when it comes to tourism, particularly if the natural safe vehicles, however, so if you are planning a
By this point in resources are at stake. road adventure, you can try a nature friendly and
the argument, the affordable campervan for hire in Tasmania, Brisbane
negative aspects of Early this year, Thailand’s government closed down and other cities in the region. With this, you can
tourism are at the Koh Khai Nok, Koh Khai Nui and Koh Khai Naiin be sure that you are helping out in protecting the
forefront and this – three popular islands off the coast of Phuket – environment in your own little way.
emphatic, single because of the negative impact of tourists in the
sentence paragraph islands. This decision was weeks after Koh Tachai, Land resources consist of forests, wildlife, minerals,
effectively sums up one of Thailand’s National Parks, had been closed fertile soil, wetland and fossil fuels. The expanded
and emphasises the because of coral bleaching and damages to the construction of recreational facilities adds more
points that have marine ecosystem. pressure to both stunning landscapes and natural
been made so far. resources. This may lead to land degradation
The regional chief of Thailand’s Department of because of the changes that are happening, which
Marine and Coastal Resources said that coral are deleterious to the land resources. More so,
bleaching occurs naturally and is also caused by
climate change and by human activity, especially
from the increasing number of tourists, boats that
anchor on the corals, people walking on corals while
playing in the water, feeding marine animals and
catching them to take photos with them.
It is not just the ocean and the island that tourism is
slowly killing.
52
4.2 Writing to argue or persuade
The two preceding forests regularly endure the destructive effect of The impact of tourism on the environment is In conclusion the
paragraphs widen tourism as deforestation is created by land clearing attributed to thoughtless visitors who blatantly writer sums up his
the scope of the as well as by wood being required for fuel. ignore environmental rules. And closing down overall argument;
argument but also islands is the first step in ensuring that the world’s referring back to a
introduce more One of the most essential natural resources is water. environment is not damaged beyond repair. point he made at
facts and examples It is very evident that the tourism industry overuses the very beginning
to emphasise the water resources for the development of golf courses, With climate change still posing great damage is a very effective
writer’s viewpoint. swimming pools, hotels, and even the personal to natural resources around the world, proactive way of ensuring
use of water by some tourists which results in the approaches like what Thailand did, despite its huge that the readers
degradation of water supplies and water shortages. blow on their tourism and economy, might be the think carefully
It is important that we all conserve water both in our best way to protect the Earth. about what he has
own homes and when we are on holiday as water said.
scarcity is major issue in some parts of the world Source: www.triplepundit.com/podium/negative-impact-
now. tourism-environment
Exercise 4
1 From paragraphs 1 and 2, using your own words, give one example of the ways
tourism can benefit a country and one way that it can harm the environment.
2 Why do you think that the writer believes that ‘It will never be a great idea to
exceed limits when it comes to tourism’? (paragraph 3)
3 Give three ways in which tourists can damage coral reefs.
4 In what ways does tourism increase air pollution? What are some countries
doing to reduce this?
5 Explain, using your own words, what the writer means by ‘The expanded
construction of recreational facilities’. (paragraph 9)
6 What are the two main reasons for the cutting down of forests mentioned by
the writer in paragraph 9?
7 Explain fully, using your own words, why the writer considers the action of
Thailand’s government is ‘proactive’. (paragraph 12)
8 Identify a word or phrase from paragraphs 10–11 (‘One of the most essential
… damaged beyond repair.’) which suggests the same idea as the words
underlined:
(a) The stonework of the old castle showed increasing signs of deterioration as
the centuries passed.
(b) We had to make a long journey across the desert, so it was necessary to
safeguard our supply of bottled water.
(c) Despite being seen by several witnesses, the suspect shamelessly denied
that he has been involved in the crime.
9 Using your own words, explain what the writer means by each of the words
underlined:
One of the most essential natural resources is water. It is very evident that the
tourism industry overuses water resources for the development of golf courses,
swimming pools, hotels, and even the personal use of water by some tourists which
results in the degradation of water supplies and water shortages. It is important
that we all conserve water both in our own homes and when we are on holiday as
water scarcity is major issue in some parts of the world now.
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4 Becoming a better writer
(a) essential
(b) overuses
(c) personal.
10 Using your own words, explain how the phrases underlined are used by the
writer to show his concerns about the impact of tourism on the environment.
One of the most essential natural resources is water. It is very evident that the
tourism industry overuses water resources for the development of golf courses,
swimming pools, hotels, and even the personal use of water by some tourists which
results in the degradation of water supplies and water shortages. It is important
that we all conserve water both in our own homes and when we are on holiday as
water scarcity is major issue in some parts of the world now.
Key terms 4.3 Writing imaginatively to entertain your
readers
Imaginative
(writing): If you are writing an imaginative piece – narrating a story or writing a description,
Imaginative writing for example – because you are hoping to engage a reader’s imagination and not just
is writing that is give factual information, you will not have to structure your piece in the same
not concerned logical, argued way as for an informative or persuasive piece. However, it is still
with giving factual important that your writing has a clear structure.
information but
which creates a Perhaps most importantly, you need to know how your story will end before you
story and setting start (see the section on planning your writing on pages 61–64). You might want
from the writer’s your ending to be a surprise to your readers, but it shouldn’t be a surprise to you!
imagination. The beginning is important, too.
Adjective: A word
used to describe a For a story you can either:
noun, e.g. the angry » start by setting the scene – this is fine, but don’t give too much time/space to it,
teacher.
Adverb: A word, keep it to one short paragraph
frequently ending » go straight into the story, for example with a line of dialogue.
in –ly, that is used to
describe the action For a piece of descriptive writing you can:
expressed by a verb. » describe your subject in a factual way, focusing on its outward appearance, or
For example: The » describe your impressions of the subject and how it affects your feelings, or
teacher shouted » use a combination of both approaches.
angrily at the class. N.B. More detailed advice on writing descriptions and narratives can be found in
Imagery: Language Unit 12 Sections 12.2 and 12.3, pages 167–170.
(such as similes)
used to create A good piece of imaginative writing is varied and inventive. Here are some ideas
a figurative on how to make sure your skills in this area are clear to the reader!
description. » Be varied and inventive.
Exclamation: A » Use some words which are abstract and colourful.
sudden outcry or » Use descriptive vocabulary: adjectives, adverbs.
remark, usually » Use imagery, for example, ‘she grinned like a crocodile’.
showing surprise, » Use exclamations and/or words that convey their meaning through sound.
anger or pain.
(These might be dramatic, for example, ‘Thud!’, ‘Crash!’; or they might just be
well-chosen words that convey the exact sound you have in mind, for example
‘tinkling’, ‘rustled’.)
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4.3 Writing imaginatively to entertain your readers
» Your paragraphs should vary in length. An occasional very short paragraph can
make a strong impact. Some paragraphs might even be just one word long, such
as ‘Help!’
» Your sentences should also vary in length – this is a good way to have an effect
on your reader’s feelings. For example, if you have just been setting a frightening
scene, a short sentence such as ‘We waited.’ or even just ‘Silence.’ can be very
effective.
Exercise 5
Prepare yourself with a selection of novels and short stories (either brought in
from home or taken from the school or class library).
With a partner, look through the opening pages of these stories, note the different
ways in which the writers start their accounts (in particular, are they written in the
first or third person) and discuss how effective each of them is in making you want
to continue reading.
Example of imaginative writing
Read carefully the extract from The First Men in the Moon, an early work of science
fiction written by H.G. Wells and published in 1901. Then answer the questions that
follow.
The story tells of the adventures of the narrator, Bedford, and an eccentric
scientist, Cavor, as they explore the surface of the moon having travelled there in
a spherical space capsule, invented by Cavor. (Our knowledge of space travel and
conditions on the moon has increased significantly since Wells wrote this book!)
Sunrise on the Moon
As we saw it first it was the
wildest and most desolate
of scenes. We were in an
enormous amphitheatre, a vast
circular plain, the floor of the
giant crater. Its cliff-like walls
closed us in on every side.
From the westward the light of
the unseen sun fell upon them,
reaching to the very foot of the
cliff, and showed a disordered
escarpment of drab and greyish
rock, lined here and there with
banks and crevices of snow.
This was perhaps a dozen
miles away, but at first no
intervening atmosphere diminished in the slightest the minutely detailed brilliancy with
which these things glared at us. They stood out clear and dazzling against a background
of starry blackness that seemed to our earthly eyes rather a gloriously spangled velvet
curtain than the spaciousness of the sky.
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4 Becoming a better writer
The passage begins The eastward cliff was at first merely a starless selvedge to the starry dome. No rosy flush, The sudden arrival
with a detailed no creeping pallor, announced the commencing day. Only the Corona, the Zodiacal light, of the lunar day is
imaginative a huge cone-shaped, luminous haze, pointing up towards the splendour of the morning reinforced by this
description of a new star, warned us of the imminent nearness of the sun. short, sharp one-
day dawning on sentence paragraph.
the moon. The Whatever light was about us was reflected by the westward cliffs. It showed a huge
description undulating plain, cold and grey, a grey that deepened eastward into the absolute raven As the day becomes
emphasises both darkness of the cliff shadow. Innumerable rounded grey summits, ghostly hummocks, clearer, the writer’s
the silent emptiness billows of snowy substance, stretching crest beyond crest into the remote obscurity, gave language becomes
of the scenery us our first inkling of the distance of the crater wall. These hummocks looked like snow. more animated,
and the clarity of At the time I thought they were snow. But they were not – they were mounds and masses particularly through
the atmosphere. of frozen air. the choice of verbs
The writer skilfully – ‘quiet’ words like
presents the coming So it was at first; and then, sudden, swift, and amazing, came the lunar day. ‘crept’ and ‘touched’
of day, showing each give way to ‘striding’,
different detail as The sunlight had crept down the cliff, it touched the drifted masses at its base and came ‘quiver’, ‘steaming’.
it is brought to our striding with seven-leagued boots towards us. The distant cliff seemed to shift and quiver,
eyes as the sun picks and at the touch of the dawn a reek of grey vapour poured upward from the crater floor,
it out. whirls and puffs and drifting wraiths of grey, thicker and broader and denser, until at last
the whole westward plain was steaming like a wet handkerchief held before the fire, and
Notice how the the westward cliffs were no more than refracted glare beyond.
skilfully controlled
use of direct speech, ‘It is air,’ said Cavor. ‘It must be air – or it would not rise like this – at the mere touch of a
following on from sun-beam. And at this pace …’
a lengthy passage
of description, adds He peered upwards. ‘Look!’ he said.
immediacy to the
story and engages ‘What?’ I asked.
the reader.
‘In the sky. Already. On the blackness – a little touch of blue. See! The stars seem larger.
And the little ones we saw in empty space – they are hidden!’
Swiftly, steadily, the day approached us. Grey summit after grey summit was overtaken
by the blaze, and turned to a smoking white intensity. At last there was nothing to the
west of us but a bank of surging fog, the tumultuous advance and ascent of cloudy haze.
The distant cliff had receded farther and farther, had loomed and changed through the
whirl, and foundered and vanished at last in its confusion.
Nearer came that steaming advance, nearer and nearer, coming as fast as the shadow of a
cloud before the south-west wind. About us rose a thin anticipatory haze.
Cavor gripped my arm. ‘What?’ I said.
‘Look! The sunrise! The sun!’
He turned me about and pointed to the brow of the eastward cliff, looming above the
haze about us, scarce lighter than the darkness of the sky. But now its line was marked
by strange reddish shapes, tongues of vermilion flame that writhed and danced. I saw a
crown of fire about the sun that is forever hidden from earthly eyes by our atmospheric
veil.
And then – the sun!
Steadily, inevitably came a brilliant line, came a thin edge of intolerable effulgence that
took a circular shape, became a bow, became a blazing sceptre, and hurled a shaft of heat
at us as though it was a spear.
It seemed to stab my eyes! I cried aloud and turned about blinded, groping for my blanket
beneath the bale.
And with that incandescence came a sound, the first sound that had reached us from
without since we left the earth, a hissing and rustling, the stormy trailing of the aerial
56
4.3 Writing imaginatively to entertain your readers
The writer has garment of the advancing day. And with the coming of the sound and the light the sphere This final paragraph
varied the length lurched, and blinded and dazzled we staggered helplessly against each other. It lurched is a lot shorter
of his paragraphs again, and the hissing grew louder. I shut my eyes; I was making clumsy efforts to cover than the one that
throughout but now my head with my blanket, and this second lurch sent me helplessly off my feet. I fell precedes it; the
as the sun attains against the bale, and opening my eyes had a momentary glimpse of the air just outside short sentences
full brightness that our glass. It was running – it was boiling – like snow into which a white-hot rod is thrust. reinforce the physical
seems to attack What had been solid air had suddenly at the touch of the sun become a paste, a mud, a experience of the
the characters, the slushy liquefaction, that hissed and bubbled into gas. characters, and the
pace and rhythm emphatic conclusion
of the sentences There came a still more violent whirl of the sphere and we had clutched one another. In leaves the reader
increase to convey another moment we were spun about again. Round we went and over, and then I was on much to think about.
the excitement and all fours. The lunar dawn had hold of us. It meant to show us little men what the moon
fearful response of could do with us.
the two characters.
Source: The First Men in the Moon by H.G. Wells
Exercise 6
1 In paragraph 1 where are the explorers and their space craft?
2 Explain, using your own words, the meaning of the following underlined words
and phrases as used in the passage:
(a) ‘a disordered escarpment of drab and greyish rocks’
(b) ‘The eastward cliff was at first merely a starless selvedge to the starry
dome.’
(c) ‘a thin edge of intolerable effulgence’
3 By referring to paragraph 3, explain, using your own words, why the explorers
were able to see the scenery around them.
4 Explain fully, using your own words, the first effects of the appearance of the
sun as described by the writer in paragraph 5.
5 Explain, using your own words, why the ‘crown of fire’ around the sun is not
visible from Earth.
6 What effect does the writer achieve by the four-word paragraph, ‘And then –
the sun!’?
7 Explain, using your own words, the effect on the narrator of the appearance of
the sun.
8 Re-read paragraphs 10–18 and then write a summary of everything that Cavor
and the narrator saw as the sun rose.
9 Explain fully, using your own words, what happens to the explorers in the last
two paragraphs of the extract.
10 Re-read the last six paragraphs of the passage (‘He turned me about … could
do with us.’) and then choose eight powerful words or phrases from it to show
how the writer’s use of language conveys:
(a) the strange glory of the sunrise on the moon
(b) the effect that it had on the two men.
Your choices should include imagery.
Remember to use quotations from the passage in your answer. You should write
between 200 and 300 words in total.
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4 Becoming a better writer
4.4 Different styles for different audiences
Whom are you writing for?
Now that we have looked at the purpose of your writing, or what you are writing
for, it’s important to think about your audience, or whom you are writing for. It is
important that you think about the way writers have used language to communicate
with their audience and how it reflects the context of the audience. This is what is
called the writer’s register – for example, a story written for young children is likely
to have an informal register, whereas a legal document will have a formal one.
When you are writing in an examination, in one sense your audience is always
one adult – the person who will mark the paper. However, sometimes for a particular
writing task you will also be required to consider another specific audience, for
example:
children a school newspaper
a member of your local
your headteacher community council
It is important to think about your audience and how it should affect the way you
write.
» If you are writing for children, the vocabulary you use must be simple, the
sentences must be fairly short and they certainly must not be complex.
» If you are writing an article for a school newspaper, you should consider the
audience for whom you are writing – if it is just for your school mates, then
it’s acceptable to write colloquially, but if it’s for the wider school community
(parents and teachers as well as students), then it is better to be more formal.
It is a good idea to use the latter approach if you are answering an examination
question!
» If you are writing for your headteacher or to a member of your local community
council, then it is appropriate to explore your subject in a more complex or
sophisticated way, and to use more difficult or technical vocabulary.
Don’t ever start your piece of writing without asking yourself the question ‘Whom
am I writing for?’
If your writing shows that you are aware of your audience, you are more likely to
gain higher marks.
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4.4 Different styles for different audiences
Exercise 7
Read back over the different examples of writing earlier in this unit and decide
whom you think the main audience is for each passage. Make notes of expressions
and comments that would appear to be aimed at communicating with that
audience.
Example of writing for an audience
Read the passage below, ‘Teen in tow’, by a parent who is writing for an audience of
similarly minded parents and is trying to encourage them to think positively about
the experience of taking their teenage children with them on a caravan camping
holiday, and then answer the tasks that follow.
Teen in tow:
A parent’s survival guide
If a temperamental teen blights your caravanning life, follow our guide to achieve touring harmony.
By Lynda Bailey
Caravan holidays are perfect for families; we all know that. altogether and if the site bans ballgames, you could be
A week or two in your van with a couple of little ones on off to a rocky start.
board may be hard work, but it will always be fun.
Parenting skills re-kindled
You will spend your days safe in the knowledge that by 8 For a start, you will suddenly re-discover all of those
p.m., those happy little campers will be tucked up in bed parenting skills you thought were gone forever. A
full of fresh air, and you can sit peacefully together, watch full-volume, floor-prone tantrum in the supermarket
the sun set and savour the moment. when your child was two will have finely tuned your
emergency distraction/bribery/cajoling techniques.
Fast forward a few years, however, a glowering teenager
who is still wide awake and glued to a tablet long after the Your skills will suddenly flood back when you are in the
sun has set and long after you yourselves should have, and unfortunate position of having to explain to your youth
would have, been asleep obscures that moment. that there is not only a ballgame ban but also a bikes
ban on this particular site and sorry, there’s no WiFi.
Oh yes, sharing a confined space with a reluctant,
monosyllabic 15-year old is a whole different ballgame Believe me. I’ve been there.
Fortunately, however, you can rest safely in the
knowledge that your ‘happy little camper’ is still in there
somewhere; it may just take a little bit more work to
encourage him to come out and play.
More encouraging still, as time goes by, you will find
that rather than go with your initial reaction to sell the
caravan and maybe even abandon holidays altogether
for a decade or two, there are some definite advantages
to having a teenager in tow.
Firstly, unlike very young children, they can be relied
upon to carry out certain tasks rather well, possibly even
better than the adult who usually undertakes them (this
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4 Becoming a better writer
can bring its problems with daddy, but I’ll concentrate aqua roll (but you need to have luck very much on your
on the positive for the moment). side). Mum taking the initiative and inviting a similar lone,
but unknown, member of the teen species over for a bbq
They are also quieter than toddlers, and not always because doesn’t work either.
they are in a mood. You don’t have to escort them to the
facilities and if you have a particularly responsible one you Responsibility.
can even leave them alone in the van while you go off and It’s too easy on holiday to revert to the roles you’ve
have a peaceful outing on your own. always had of adults in charge (even if, 99% of the time,
it feels like the reverse). We have found that it’s vital to
You may need to work up to this. give your fledglings some responsibility.
Like parenting as a whole, there’s a lot of ‘give and take’.
What you lose on your peaceful evenings watching the They rise to it and they blossom under it and, more
sun set you will gain with full mornings to yourselves importantly, enjoy it. Simple tasks for young teens could
waiting for said teen even to get up. include organising a walk/hike. They can plan it using
apps or maps and maybe aim to walk to a place of
What works? interest or a circular walk to include a lunch stop.
Jobs. I would suggest you take the time to praise the
Strange I know, but we have tried and tested this with completed expedition and not grumble about it being
a range of teens. A bored teenager is a grumpy one too short, long, steep or muddy, and your teen will be a
and although they will say they find most things ‘bor- happy one, keen to arrange more trips.
ring’, they seem to be surprisingly amenable to having
set tasks which they know are theirs and theirs alone. We have taken cousins and friends on holiday with us
and tailoring a responsibility or job to their individual
Of course, you can’t be silly about it. Filling up the aqua interests works. My niece likes to cook and enjoyed
roll is acceptable, even good; emptying the waste is not. planning a complete day’s menu, from buying the food
Walking a pet is regarded as being ‘fun’ and possibly if on her own to cooking it all in the caravan or bbq and
you’re lucky, ‘cool’. It gives teenagers an opportunity to serving it up with panache.
find out the lie of the land without being conspicuous
which, let’s face it, is every teenager’s nightmare. We added to the occasion by sending invites and
‘dressing for dinner.’ It may be different to a traditional
Helping put up the awning can work. If you’re lucky, day out at the zoo, but it works.
sending the teens shopping to the site shop is a good
one, but don’t include any bathroom items on the WiFi.
list as you simply will end up with four cans of baked That hot potato. It’s all about finding out what works
beans and a bottle of coke instead. Teenagers don’t ‘do’ for you. We started off (over) optimistically with the plan
embarrassing. that no WiFi whatsoever on holiday was the way to go,
but this approach didn’t work for us. The holiday started
Exercise. with a grump, we didn’t get the benefit of having apps
They like it. Of course, teenagers benefit from it, and it’s for him to use or even of being able to check the weather
a great mood improver, but sometimes you need to be forecast ourselves. As ever, compromise saved the day.
a little crafty to get them doing it.
Some sites offer a games room with free WiFi which is
If your teens are sporty, you are halfway there, especially a great way for teens to meet like-minded new friends
if you’ve chosen a site with or near a pool as this is always while under the guise of using their smartphones. Others
a winner. Such a site will have a games room or similar offer limited WiFi but for a charge. We sometimes offer
area too. A games room is not always a precursor to a to buy our son an hour of WiFi, and he has to fund
successful holiday though as I have found to our cost. any further time out of his own pocket. If he wants to
download a movie, we will typically support this too, at
Teens can be a shy species and the days of walking up least once in the holiday.
to a kid the same size as you and admiring the size of
their bucket no longer signifies the start of a beautiful It’s certainly a good idea to check the WiFi situation
holiday friendship. before you book a site. Let’s face it, teens aren’t the only
ones who like a bit of WiFi and if he’s watching a film
Those table tennis tables, tennis and boules courts only or busy Snapchatting, at least we get our sunset back.
work if you have more than one teen, and they get on.
Or, if they’ve somehow already integrated and found a Source: www.outandaboutlive.co.uk/caravans/articles/
kindred spirit while out walking their pet and filling the practical-advice/teen-in-tow-a-parents-survival-guide
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4.5 Planning your writing
Exercise 8
Now that you have read the article, answer the following questions:
1 The article is written for an audience of parents of teenagers. Make a list of ten
words and phrases used by the writer that you think are particularly aimed at
appealing to this audience and explain why you think they are effective or not.
2 Now look at the language the writer uses to talk about the teenagers in the
family. What impressions does this give of the teenagers and of the writer’s
attitudes towards them?
3 Who is the target audience for this piece of writing? When you have identified
whom you think the audience is, find examples of the ways in which the writer
uses details that would appeal to her audience and explain why they are
effective.
4 How would you describe the register used by the writer? Choose five examples of
words or phrases from the article that illustrate this use of language and explain
the effect that the writer achieves through them.
5 Finally, write a paragraph of 200–300 words in which you consider how
successful the article is in fulfilling the purpose for which it was written.
Key term 4.5 Planning your writing
Paragraph: A Structuring a piece of writing
distinct portion of
writing consisting of The way in which you structure a piece of writing depends on the purpose of the
sentences focused piece and the audience it is being written for.
on a single idea.
A structure is likely to go wrong if you don’t plan the whole piece of writing
before you start. Most importantly, you must know what the end is going to be.
If you are writing an argumentative or informative piece, you need to:
» be clear how you are going to balance the argument with points for and against,
or
» how you are going to give one piece of information more prominence than
another.
If you are writing an imaginative piece, you need to know how:
» you are going to introduce characters
» you are going to describe them
» you are going to create atmosphere and setting
» the plot is going to develop
» your ending is going to work.
On page 152 you will find some comments about paragraphing. This is always
important but the way you use paragraphs depends on the purpose of your writing.
For instance, an argumentative piece will normally be divided into paragraphs of
roughly equal length, as an argument has to have a clear and balanced structure.
In an imaginative piece, the length of the paragraphs will probably be more
varied, as the different elements of the narrative will have different degrees of
importance.
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4 Becoming a better writer
Key term Generally speaking, the structure should always have the following three parts:
1 Introduction: in a factual piece, this should state briefly what the theme of the
Factual: A factual
piece of writing piece is and – if appropriate – what opinion you are putting forward on this
contains details that theme. In an imaginative piece, you may choose to set the scene or to go for a
can be proved to be more dramatic/immediate start.
true. 2 Main body of explanation/argument/narrative.
3 Conclusion/story ending.
Practical ways to plan your writing
When completing a writing task or answering a question, you might think you don’t
have time to create a plan. However, creating a plan will make sure your writing is
clear and covers everything it needs to.
Whether you are doing a piece of writing in response to a text you have read (see
Unit 7) or a piece of continuous writing for a composition or coursework assignment
(see Units 5 and 6), it is essential that you plan what you are going to write.
There are various methods you can use. Spider diagrams and lists are two
possibilities, but you may find another method that works best for you.
Spider diagrams
Stage 1
The spider diagram represents an attempt to plan for an argumentative essay topic:
‘A lot of our life is spent doing useless things. Is this true?’
» Write your topic in the middle of the page and around it write down all the things
that you might write about.
» At this stage, don’t stop to think too much – just write down any relevant ideas
that come to mind.
education subjects we are made why do we have to keep why waste time
partying to study things tidy? sleeping?
doing things we A lot of our life is spent spending time with people
don’t want to do doing useless things. we don't like because we have
Is this true?
to be polite
being asked to do
jobs around the
house looking smart watching television
learning how to calculate in our
learning history heads when we have calculators
space exploration – taking exams
who cares?
Stage 2
The next stage is to decide if there are things that need to be discarded, and how to
order the points that are being kept.
» There are a number of points about education (linked by pink lines on the
diagram opposite).
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4.5 Planning your writing
» There are a number of points about personal life (linked by blue lines).
» The idea about space exploration is probably going to be discarded.
» Then number the points to give them an order; each numbered point will be a
paragraph or part of a paragraph in your composition.
Study tip education 1 subjects we are made why do we have to keep why waste time
partying 13 to study 2 things tidy? 7 sleeping? 12
1 At this stage,
don’t be afraid to doing things we A lot of our life is spent spending time with people
cross things out. don’t want to do 6 doing useless things. we don't like because we
being asked to do jobs Is this true?
2 If you find that two around the house 8 looking smart 9 have to be polite 11
of your ideas are watching television 10
closely linked, you learning history 3
should probably learning how to calcu-
combine them. late hinaoveurcahelcaudlastwohrsen4
space exploration we
3 Remember that – who cares?
it is not just a taking exams 5
case of putting
forward one side Stage 3
of the argument The order of the composition now looks like this:
– the points being
made need to be
answered.
A lot of our life is spent doing useless things. Is this true?
Para 1 General statement about importance of education. (1)
Para 2 However – subjects we are made to study are a waste of time. (2) Why learn history? (3) Why
bother to learn to do calculations in our heads – calculators! (4)
Para 3 Why do examinations in subjects which are of no importance? (5)
Para 4 General statement about doing things we don’t want to do. (6)
Para 5 Being pestered to keep our rooms tidy. (7) Doing jobs around the house we don’t want to. (8) Being
made to look smart when we want to be comfortable. (9)
Para 6 We watch television when we can’t think of anything else to do. (10) We spend time with people
we don’t like (perhaps relatives) because we have to. (11)
Para 7 Why can’t someone invent something which means we don’t have to waste time sleeping? (12)
What we want to do is to party. (13)
Para 8 Conclusion.
What is important in life? What is unimportant?
This might not be how your plan would look in terms of content and ideas. However,
it shows you how you might go about planning.
Why not take the topic title above and do your own plan? You could then go on to
write the composition.
Lists
Instead of a spider diagram, you may prefer simply to put things down in a list.
With this method, it’s important to look carefully at the whole list again before you
start to write.
» Don’t be afraid to change the order of your points.
» Don’t automatically think your first ideas are the best: check through the list and
discard/replace some points if you have second thoughts.
63
4 Becoming a better writer
However you choose to plan, the crucial point is this: don’t be afraid to spend time
on planning! If you have an hour to do a piece of writing, you should spend 15
minutes planning it.
One of the reasons people don’t plan is because they panic about not having
enough time.
Look on the positive side: if you have a very clear plan in front of you, you don’t
have to waste time worrying about what to put next, so you will write much faster
and more efficiently.
Exercise 9
Here are three essay titles related to the topic of Travel and Exploration. For each
one, write down your ideas for it in the form of a spider diagram. Once you have
done this, produce a more formal paragraph plan/structure for the essay. You
should write the plan only and not the complete essay.
Think about the way you have structured your writing – did all the topics require
a logical structure or did some allow you greater flexibility? Why do you think this
was so?
1 Some people consider themselves to be travellers and others call themselves
tourists. What do you understand by these terms?
2 Can we really justify spending large sums of money on space exploration?
3 Describe the best and the worst travel experiences you have had and say what
made them so.
Unit summary
In this unit you have reviewed the objectives:
• express what is thought, felt and imagined
• organise and convey facts, ideas and opinions effectively
• demonstrate a varied vocabulary appropriate to the context
• demonstrate an effective use of sentence structures
• demonstrate an understanding of audience, purpose and form
• demonstrate accuracy in spelling, punctuation and grammar.
64
CHAPTER 2
Environment
Units
5 More complex questions/how writers achieve effects
6 More complex summary questions
7 Directed writing
65
5 More complex questions/
how writers achieve effects
In this unit you will:
H demonstrate understanding of explicit meanings
H demonstrate understanding of implicit meanings and attitudes
H demonstrate understanding of how writers achieve effects and influence
readers
H articulate experience and express what is thought, felt and imagined
H organise and structure ideas and opinions for deliberate effect
H use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures appropriate to context
H use register appropriate to context
H make accurate use of spelling, punctuation and grammar.
This unit will focus on the following skills:
Reading
H demonstrate understanding of written texts, and of the words and phrases
within them
H develop, analyse and evaluate facts, ideas and opinions
H demonstrate understanding of how writers achieve their effects and
influence readers
H select appropriate information for specific purposes
H recognise and respond to linguistic devices, including figurative language.
Writing
H express what is thought, felt and imagined
H organise and convey facts, ideas and opinions effectively
H demonstrate an effective use of sentence structures
H demonstrate an understanding of audience, purpose and form
H demonstrate a varied vocabulary appropriate to the context
H demonstrate accuracy in spelling, punctuation and grammar.
66
Introduction
Key terms Introduction
Continuous writing: Writers use a variety of techniques to achieve a particular effect with their writing.
Continuous writing They carefully select words and phrases to make their audience respond in a
describes something particular way. In this unit we will be looking at ways to approach tasks that ask
like an essay or you about how writers use these tools.
story that is written
in linked, flowing 5.1 More complex comprehension
paragraphs with no questions
sub-headings, etc. It
differs from directed You might need to use your reading skills to answer questions that require more
writing as writers developed and longer responses. For example, you may be asked to produce a piece
express their original of continuous writing in which you show your understanding of a reading passage
thoughts and ideas by using details from it with a different purpose from that of the original writer and
and do not have to addressing a different audience.
follow a prescribed
content or format. Another type of longer question might ask you to write a detailed analysis of
Tone: The mood the writer’s use of language and how it sets out to achieve a particular response in
implied by a piece readers.
of writing, conveyed
through the writer’s Understanding how writers achieve effects
choice of words,
sentence structures All good writers are aware of their audience and choose their words carefully in
and so on. order to persuade their readers to share their viewpoint. To do this, they pay
Simile: A descriptive particular attention to the tone of voice they use.
comparison
introduced by like or The tone or register of a piece of writing is produced not just by the choice of
as in which one thing vocabulary, but also by the lengths and types of sentences used, the choice of
is compared directly similes and metaphors as well as the use of other literary devices such as irony,
to another. rhetorical questions, alliteration and so on.
Metaphor: A
descriptive When you are analysing the way a writer uses language it is important that first
comparison in you decide on the purpose of the piece of writing and the audience for whom it
which one thing is is intended. You should always keep these points in mind and refer to them when
expressed in terms analysing a writer’s use of language.
of another unrelated
object. Emotive language
Irony: The use of
words to convey a Words have different suggested meanings depending upon the context in which they
meaning opposite to are used; professional writers are very much aware of these associations and will use
their literal sense. them to influence the way their readers respond to what is written. For example,
Alliteration: The think about the difference between these two sentences:
repetition of the
same sound at the ‘On arrival at her uncle’s house, she was given a cordial welcome.’
beginning of words ‘On arrival at her uncle’s house, she was given a hearty welcome.’
in a phrase, for Both sentences give the same basic information to the reader, but the choice
example the cold, of adjectives (‘cordial’ and ‘hearty’) gives the reader different impressions of the
clear, call of the warmth of the welcome the girl received.
cuckoo. ‘Cordial’ suggests something much more formal than ‘hearty’, although the root
Purpose: A writer’s meaning of both words is exactly the same. (‘Cordial’ derives from the Latin word
purpose is her/his for heart.) A sensitive writer, however, is aware of the different suggestions of the
reason for writing. It two words (much formal language in English derives from Latin vocabulary) and
may be to entertain, will choose ‘hearty’ to describe a friendly reception and ‘cordial’ to describe a more
persuade, inform, formal greeting.
explain, etc. Now look at this example: it is a collection of eye-witness reports of the great
Audience: The earthquake that hit San Francisco on the 18th April 1906.
people for whom
a piece of writing 67
is intended; the
spectators at a
dramatic or musical
performance.
5 More complex questions/ how writers achieve effects
Read carefully the article ‘Destruction in the City’ and then answer the questions that
follow. You should use the section headed ‘Answer techniques’ on pages 69–70 to help
focus your answers.
DESTRUCTION
IN THE CITY
Businessman Jerome B. Clark
lived in Berkeley across the all descriptions either down, new modern palaces, blown to
bay from San Francisco. He or walls bulging and buildings atoms. First they blew up one or
experienced a minor shake- moved bodily two or three feet. two buildings at a time. Finding
up at his home in the early that of no avail, they took half
morning but this did not stop Fires were blazing in all a block; that was no use; then
him from making his regular directions, and all of the finest they took a block; but in spite
trip to the city. He describes and best of the office and of them all the fire kept on
what he saw as he disembarked business buildings were either spreading.’
from the ferry: burning or surrounded. They
pumped water from the bay, but A Narrow Escape
‘In every direction from the fire was soon too far away
the ferry building flames from the water front to make The quake awoke G.A.
were seething, and as I stood efforts in this direction of much Raymond as he slept in his
there, a five-storey building avail. The water mains had room at the Palace Hotel. He
half a block away fell with a been broken by the earthquake, describes his escape:
crash, and the flames swept and so there was no supply
clear across Market Street for the fire engines and they ‘I awoke as I was thrown out
and caught a new fireproof were helpless. The only way of bed. Attempting to walk,
building recently erected. The out was to dynamite, and I saw the floor shook so that I fell. I
streets in places had sunk three some of the finest and most grabbed my clothing and rushed
or four feet, in others great beautiful buildings in the city, down into the office, where
humps had appeared four or dozens were already
five feet high. The street car
tracks were bent and twisted
out of shape. Electric wires
lay in every direction. Streets
on all sides were filled with
brick and mortar, buildings
either completely collapsed or
brick fronts had just dropped
completely off. Wagons
with horses hitched to them,
drivers and all, lying on the
streets, struck and killed by
the falling bricks. Warehouses
and large wholesale houses of
68
5.1 More complex comprehension questions
congregated. Suddenly the crying, praying and calling for had indeed been precipitated
lights went out, and every one help. I thought the end of the into the earth, a wide fissure
rushed for the door. world had come. having swallowed them. I was
crazy with fear and the horrible
Outside I witnessed a sight I I met a priest, and he said: sights.
never want to see again. It was “We must get to the ferry.”
dawn and light. I looked up. He knew the way, and we How I reached the ferry
The air was filled with falling rushed down Market Street. I cannot say. It was bedlam,
stones. People around me were Men, women and children pandemonium and hell rolled
crushed to death on all sides. were crawling from the debris. into one. There must have
All around the huge buildings Hundreds were rushing down been 10 000 people trying to
were shaking and waving. Every the street and every minute get on that boat. Men and
moment there were reports people were felled by debris. women fought like wildcats to
like 100 cannons going off at push their way aboard. One
one time. Then streams of fire At places the streets had big, strong man, beat his head
would shoot out, and other cracked and opened. Chasms against one of the iron pillars
reports followed. extended in all directions. on the dock, and cried out in
I saw a drove of cattle, wild a loud voice: “This fire must
I asked a man standing next with fright, rushing up Market be put out! The city must be
to me what happened. Before he Street. I crouched beside a saved!” It was awful.’
could answer a thousand bricks swaying building. As they
fell on him and he was killed. came nearer they disappeared, Source: The San Francisco Earthquake,
All around me buildings were seeming to drop out into the 1906, EyeWitness to History,
rocking and flames shooting. As earth. When the last had gone www.eyewitnesstohistory.com (1997)
I ran people on all sides were I went nearer and found they
Exercise 1
1 (Extended Response to Reading) Imagine that you were visiting San Francisco
and survived the earthquake. You were able to escape from the city on the ferry.
Write a letter to your older sister telling her about your experience.
In your letter:
• give your impressions of the effects of the earthquake
• describe the suffering of the people you have met
• describe how you managed to escape from the city.
Base your letter on what you have read in the passage. Be careful to use your
own words.
2 Re-read the passage and then, referring closely to the words and phrases used in
the accounts, explain how they convey to his readers:
(a) the immediate after-effects of the earthquake on San Francisco
(b) the feelings and experiences of those who witnessed the earthquake.
Answer techniques
Question 1
It is important to remember that questions of this type test both reading and
writing skills and that very often the marks allotted to the reading element are
greater than those allotted to writing.
When approaching a task such as this, you should ensure that you have a clear
understanding of the precise details on which you should focus in the original
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5 More complex questions/ how writers achieve effects
Key terms passage. If the question contains bullet points indicating key topics (see Exercise 1
above) then it is a good idea to use the bullet points in structuring your response.
Discriminator: A
more demanding It is likely that one of the bullet points may require you to make inferences
examination based on implications contained in the passage – this bullet is likely to be a key
question, the discriminator and requires a thoughtful and developed response. Remember that
correct answering your treatment of this must be based on ideas contained in the passage; made-up
of which details with no basis in the original passage will not be considered evidence of
distinguishes the understanding (although they may still be assessed independently under the writing
more successful criteria).
responses.
Persona: The Questions such as question 1 on page 69 require you to adopt a persona (in this
role or character case, that of a visitor to San Francisco) and provide you with a genre for writing (a
adopted by an friendly letter) and an audience to whom your writing should be addressed (an older
author. sister).
Informal tone: » Remember, the letter is to a close relative so you will be expected to adopt an
Writing that is
close to colloquial informal tone and use appropriate salutation and valediction. (‘Dear Miss …’
expression. and ‘Yours faithfully’ would be considered inappropriate, as their tone is more
Salutation: The suitable to a letter written to someone with whom you have a more distant
words used at the relationship.) However, you should also keep in mind that you need to show your
beginning of a ability to write accurately and clearly in English, so your letter should not be so
letter to address full of colloquial expressions that technical accuracy is forgotten.
the person being » It is also highly unlikely that you will be required to put an address at the top of
written to, e.g. Dear your letter but will simply be instructed to begin your letter with ‘Dear Sister ...’
Nanny… or something similar.
Valediction: The
words used to sign Question 2
off a letter, e.g.
Yours sincerely, Questions of this sort are intended to test your appreciation of the ways in which
Yours faithfully. language is used to produce a particular response from a reader. They require you
Suggestions and to explore the suggestions and associations produced in a reader’s mind by the
Associations: vocabulary and imagery used in the passage.
These words are
used to describe For example, the section headed A narrow escape contains words and phrases such
the way the as bedlam, pandemonium, wild with fright, streams of fire would shoot out, buildings
vocabulary used by were rocking and flames shooting. The first three examples convey impression that
a writer can trigger the effect of the earthquake was to send people and animals completely out of their
off connected minds.
thoughts in the
mind of a reader. The remaining three phrases which contain the words ‘shoot’, ‘shooting’ and
For example, the ‘felled’ all suggest that the city after the earthquake was like an horrific war zone, in
adjective golden in a which the city’s inhabitants had little chance of victory. The word streams reinforces
phrase such as ‘the the unnaturalness of the event, as streams are very often associated with peaceful
golden cornfield’ countryside scenes.
has a literal
meaning describing It is important to remember that this type of question tests your ability to
the colour of the explain how a writer uses language to manipulate the reader’s response; although
grass. However, the passage may contain metaphors, similes and other figures of speech, the
golden also has question is not asking you simply to identify them but instead to explain their
the suggestion of effects.
solidity and strength
and some readers Consequently, a comment such as there were reports like 100 cannons going off at
may associate the one time is of little value unless you continue to say how the simile helps to bring
word with wealth the force of the after effects of the earthquake clearly into the reader’s mind and
and richness. why it succeeds in engaging the reader with the passage.
70
5.1 More complex comprehension questions
Read carefully the passage below in which the writer describes a visit to Kamchatka,
a remote area in the east of Russia, and then answer the questions that follow.
A visit to
Kamchatka
Our park ranger cocked his shotgun and moved a
hand toward the flare gun on his belt, always the
preferred option when confronted by an adult bear
and an evolving set of circumstances. We didn’t
intend to come between the mother and her cub, but
the river in which they’d been gorging themselves
on salmon moments earlier had separated them, its
glacial current carrying the cub downstream and past our huddled group of 16 interlopers. Now, through no fault of our own,
we were in the one spot humans should never be. When mother bear raised herself to a height of two meters and looked
straight through us in search of her cub, cameras purchased in seven different countries clicked as one, despite there being
nothing separating us from eternity save for a few scant meters of easily trampled Kamchatkan scrub and our ranger Alexey
Bashnaev’s cache of soft lead, bear-killing slugs.
Fortunately, this story had a happy ending. Kamchatka brown bears are nowhere near as aggressive as their cousins the
American grizzly, and feed almost exclusively on the region’s abundant annual runs of salmon, supplementing their diets
with pine nuts, berries, and the occasional marmot. According to Alexey, only one in every hundred encounters here ends in
a bear charge. That said, having spotted maybe 150 bears over the last three days, I was probably overdue for a mauling.
But who dwells on statistics when they’re having the time of their life?
Remote Kurilskoye Lake is the largest spawning ground for red salmon in Eurasia. From the comfort of our A-frame lodge on
its shores, we watched bears chase one another over open meadows, mothers suckling their young, and cubs wrestling with
siblings. We saw them emerging from the tundra to stroll along the perimeter of the lodge’s electric fence, and we watched
as 650-kilo adult males barged their way through pristine rivers in their hunt for salmon.
If you’re after nature in the raw, then it’s hard to beat Kamchatka. Every encounter was wild, spontaneous, and thrilling.
(And even potentially lethal, like the time a bear lumbered out from behind a thicket as we collected driftwood along the
lakeshore for the evening bonfire.) The population density is less than one person per square kilometre and almost a third of
the peninsula is designated as a wilderness reserve so it won’t be long until you’re feeling at one with nature.
And what nature! Kamchatka is punctuated by more than 300 snow-dusted volcanoes, 29 of which are active. It has been
dubbed the Land of Fire and Ice, and I had my first awe-inspiring look at it flying in from Tokyo, gazing out at one peak after
another. Among them is Mount Koryaksky, whose 3,456-meter summit filled the windshield of my taxi on the drive in from
the airport. Koryaksky looks positively menacing. Just 28 kilometres outside Petropavlovsk-Kamchatskiy, the main town, it’s
a so-called Decade Volcano, one of just 16 in the world constantly on watch because of their eruptive history and proximity
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5 More complex questions/ how writers achieve effects
to significant population centres. Koryaksky last erupted in 2009, when it ejected an enormous ash plume into the sky –
which is as good a reason to get out of town as any.
On a helicopter flight south from Petropavlovsk to Kurilskoye Lake we tracked along some of the most spectacular coastal
scenery anywhere, while our final approach into (yes, into) the caldera of Mutnovsky volcano saw us hemmed in by
near-vertical walls of rock as we roared up a narrow pass to land on a slab of rock the size of a backyard swimming pool.
Mutnovsky is complex, a geological jigsaw of four overlapping stratovolcanoes that has resulted in a labyrinth of craters,
steam vents, and hot springs. Stepping out on to its pulsating, sulphurous bowl-shaped caldera, which at 1,540 meters was
still a good 800 meters below the mountain’s ice-capped summit, was one of the great moments of my traveling life.
There are vast geothermal regions here, too, including the UNESCO World Heritage-listed Valley of Geysers, voted one of the
‘Seven Wonders of Russia’ in a 2008 poll. Kamchatka’s warm waters and mineral springs have even helped preserve ancient
species of flora decimated during the last ice age, such as the blue-needled fir tree. This makes it feel like some primordial
lost world.
Source: adapted from www.destinasian.com/blog/news-briefs/kamchatka-travel
Exercise 2
Read the passage and then choose eight powerful words or phrases from it to show
how the writer’s use of language conveys his excitement at:
(a) the behaviour of the bears which he comes across, and
(b) the remoteness of the area.
Your choices should include imagery.
Remember to use quotations from the passage in your answer. You should write
between 200 and 300 words in total.
Read carefully the passage below in which the writer describes the after-effects of the
Chernobyl nuclear disaster on the surrounding area, and then answer the questions that
follow.
Nuclear
Landscape
We head north and west from Kiev, making for the town of
Narodichi. It’s 60 km due west of Chernobyl, two of whose reactors,
our guide reminds us, are still operational. The Ukrainian Parliament
has voted unanimously to close them down. The Soviet government
has refused. The Ukrainians claim 8000 died as a result of the
accident. The official Soviet figure is 32.
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5.1 More complex comprehension questions
We are passing through woodlands of pine and oak scrub We come to the village of Nozdrishche, which was evacuated last
interspersed with harvested fields and cherry and almond year. There are no ruins, there is no devastation or destruction.
orchards. An army convoy of 40 trucks passes, heading south. Wooden cottages with painted window-frames stand in their
After a while the woodland gives way to a wide and fertile orderly rows. Flowers are in bloom and grasshoppers dart around
agricultural plain. The first indication that this abundance is in lush overgrown gardens. It is a hot, soft, gentle summer’s day.
tainted comes as quite a shock. It’s a sign, set in brambles and Yet scientists who have visited the area say it could be 700 years
long grass, which reads, ‘Warning: It is forbidden for cattle to before this place comes back to life. It is hard to know what to
graze, and for anybody to gather mushrooms, strawberries and believe, for whatever curse lies over these villages is the more
medicinal herbs’. frightening for being invisible. It is how one has heard the
countryside would be after a nuclear war – benign, smiling,
We stop here and put on our yellow badges, which register deadly.
radiation levels, and which will be sent back to England for
analysis after our three-hour visit. Armed with these and a A year’s exposure to the weather has not yet dissipated a faint
radiation detector, we enter Narodichi where people have lived smell of disinfectant in a small, deserted maternity hospital. A
with radiation for over five years. It’s a neat, proud little town poster on the wall depicts the American space shuttle spinning
with a chestnut-lined main street and a silver-painted Lenin in round the earth, with the single word ‘Nyet!’ beneath. There is a
front of the party headquarters. In a year’s time there will be no book on breastfeeding, its leaves nibbled by mice, an examination
one here. chair, medical records still in files, and a portrait of Lenin which
has fallen out of its frame and lies in a corner beneath a
In the municipal gardens the grass is uncut but a fountain still scattering of glass slides and syringes. Conscious of the limited
plays. There are several memorials. One is a scorched tree with a time we have been advised to spend here we move on through
cross on it – local people think that the forest protected them the village. I catch sight of two figures down a lane to one side of
from the worst of the blast. Beside the tree are three large the main street. One is a very old lady, whose name is Heema,
boulders, one of which commemorates four villages and 548 and the other her nephew. Heema is 90 years old and has refused
people evacuated in 1986, another 15 villages and 3264 people to be moved from the village. She says she has been moved five
evacuated in 1990. Twenty-two more villages and a further times since the disaster and now she is too old and ill. Her one
11 000 people will be going in 1991. An inscription reads: ‘In wish is to die in the house in which she was born, but that is now
memory of the villages and human destinies of the Narodichi cordoned off with barbed wire, so she will remain here with her
region burnt down by radiation.’ daughter. They are the only inhabitants of Nozdrishche.
One of the most polluted areas is the children’s playground, with Further along the road, at the village of Novoye Sharno, the
13 to 17 times normal radiation levels. The red metal chairs hang radiation detector bleeps for the first time.
down from the roundabout and blue steel boats swing gently in
the breeze, but no one is allowed to play here anymore. ‘Pay attention, please,’ says Ivan, ‘the radiation is very high here.’
Ivan, the local schoolmaster, is short and podgy and his face is an This is one of the villages evacuated in 1986, immediately after
unhealthy grey. There were 10 000 children in the region, he tells the explosion and fire, and the village shop is now almost
me, now there are 3000. Two of his pupils pass by on bicycles submerged in the undergrowth. Inside it is a mess of broken
and he grabs them and introduces us. The boys, just back from a shelves, abandoned goods, smashed bottles.
Pioneer camp in Poland, look bored, and reply in monosyllables,
which Ivan translates thus: ‘The children send fraternal greetings ‘There was a panic here,’ our guide explains, unnecessarily.
to children throughout the United Kingdom.’ He smiles proudly
and a little desperately. I ask if the children’s work has been We drive back through Narodichi, where, as in Novoye Sharno
affected by their proximity to Chernobyl. He sighs and nods. and Nozdrishche and over 40 villages in this region alone, the
grass will soon grow around doors that will never be opened
‘There is not a single healthy child here.’ again, and anyone who comes here will be informed of the
dangers and the risks which those who lived here were not told
As we drive out of Narodichi, Ivan talks proudly of the history of about until it was too late.
his town, interspersing this with casually chilling present-day
observations. Source: Pole to Pole by Michael Palin,
BBC Consumer Publishing (Books), 1995
‘This is the bridge over the Oush River. It is an area of the highest
pollution.’
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5 More complex questions/ how writers achieve effects
Exercise 3
1 (Extended Response to Reading) Imagine that you are Ivan, the schoolteacher
referred to in the passage. You are visiting schools in other countries, including
yours, to raise awareness of the problems suffered by people in the Chernobyl
area. Write the words of the talk you would give to the senior students in your
school.
In your talk:
• Describe the area in which you live(d) before and after the disaster.
• Describe the suffering and problems of the people who live(d) there.
• Suggest ways in which people in other countries can help those living in the
Chernobyl area.
Base your report on what you have read in the passage. Be careful to use your
own words. You should write between 300 and 350 words.
2 Re-read the passage and then, referring closely to the words and phrases used
by the writer, explain how he conveys to his readers:
(a) the appearance of the area as a result of the nuclear disaster
(b) the effects of the disaster on the lives and appearances of the people who
live in the area.
Remember to use quotations from the passage in your answer.
Unit summary
In this unit you have reviewed the objectives:
• demonstrate understanding of explicit meanings
• demonstrate understanding of implicit meanings and attitudes
• demonstrate understanding of how writers achieve effects and influence
readers
• articulate experience and express what is thought, felt and imagined
• organise and structure ideas and opinions for deliberate effect
• use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures appropriate to context
• use register appropriate to context
• make accurate use of spelling, punctuation and grammar.
74
6 More complex summary
questions
In this unit you will:
H demonstrate understanding of explicit meanings
H demonstrate understanding of implicit meanings and attitudes
H select and use information for specific purposes
H organise and structure ideas and opinions for deliberate effect
H use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures appropriate to context
H make accurate use of spelling, punctuation and grammar.
This unit will focus on the following skills:
Reading
H demonstrate understanding of written texts, and of the words and phrases
within them
H summarise and use material for a specific context
H develop, analyse and evaluate facts, ideas and opinions
H demonstrate understanding of how writers achieve their effects and
influence readers
H select appropriate information for specific purposes
H recognise and respond to linguistic devices, including figurative language.
Writing
H express what is thought, felt and imagined
H organise and convey facts, ideas and opinions effectively
H demonstrate a varied vocabulary appropriate to the context
H demonstrate an effective use of sentence structures
H demonstrate an understanding of audience, purpose and form
H demonstrate accuracy in spelling, punctuation and grammar.
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6 More complex summary questions
Introduction
Summary writing is useful to make sure you have understood the passage you
have just read, and to help explain what the passage is about to someone else.
Summaries should be a piece of continuous writing and no more than 250 words in
length.
Key term 6.1 Complex summary questions
Linguistic The following example exercise is more complex than those we have looked at so far.
expression: The way It is based on a passage that is more demanding in content and linguistic
the language used expression.
by writers conveys
their thoughts and However, the technique required to write a summary of the passage is, in effect,
ideas to a reader. very similar to that used to respond to the passages we looked at earlier. Read the
passage and the question carefully and note down what you consider to be the main
relevant points. Then read the analysis of the task that follows.
Exercise 1
Read carefully the article ‘Genetically Modified Foods – for and against’ and then
summarise:
• What GM foods are and how they were developed.
• The reasons given as to why they could be advantageous.
• The concerns that some people in the UK have about GM foods.
Remember to make a list of key points and to use your own words as far as
possible. You should write between 200 and 250 words.
Genetically Modified Foods –
for and against (1)
There has been much concern recently about GM foods, some
of which are being tested and some of which are already used
as ingredients in the food we eat. GM stands for ‘genetically-
modified’, (1) and describes the process by which scientists
are able to pinpoint the individual gene which produces a
desired outcome, extract it, copy it and insert it into another
organism. (2)
To some extent, humans have been involved in genetic
modification for centuries. For example, larger cattle which
gave more milk were bred to produce even larger offspring.
Seeds from cereals and other crops that were hardier and
grew better were selected for planting the following year to
produce better yields. With genetically modified organisms
however, the modifications involved are often of a kind that
76
6.2 Example response
could not possibly occur naturally. (3) For example, adding In the UK, people are being far more cautious, possibly with
cow growth hormone to the embryo of a broiler chicken to good reason. Lessons learned during the BSE crisis are still
produce a larger, faster growing chicken, (2) or adding genes very much in people’s minds. Can we trust what we are eating,
from a virus to a plant to allow it to become resistant to the (8) and what could be the long-term effects? (11)
virus. (4)
The UK has potentially more to lose by the introduction of
There are many reasons why GM foods could be advantageous. GM crops. In America, farming takes place on an industrial
(3) For example, a crop could be made to grow quicker, with scale, with millions of hectares used exclusively for growing
increased protein and vitamin levels, or with less fat. (5) An crops. (9) Intensive use of pesticides has virtually wiped out
often-used argument in favour of GM crops is that drought- wild animals and plants in the huge crop fields of the US. The
resistant crops could help to alleviate famine in developing Americans can afford to do this, (12) as they also have many
countries, where low rainfall often leads to food shortages. (6) huge wilderness conservation areas often the size of several
Techniques have also been developed to make fresh produce English counties, which are havens for all their native wildlife.
last longer, so that it can ripen on the plant and be transported (10)
more easily with less wastage. (7)
In the UK, however, farms are an integral part of the
The first GM food products – a tomato purée and a vegetarian countryside. The use of herbicide- or insect-resistant crops
cheese – appeared in British supermarkets in 1996. The could potentially have severe effects on biodiversity, by
purée was made from tomatoes which were designed to stay virtually wiping out wild flowers and consequently the insects
firmer for longer, leading to (4) less waste in harvesting. The that feed on them, and further up the food chain, the predators
tomatoes also held less water, meaning that less water was that eat the insects. (13)
required to grow them (8) and less energy was used removing
water from them to turn them into purée. This in turn made Some crops are being developed to improve soil quality, (13) by
the purée cheaper for the consumer. (5) removing heavy metals from the soil, for example, so that they
can be harvested and destroyed. An excellent idea, but what
The first GM soya was planted in the US in the same year, about the animals that eat the contaminated plants? Others
and up to 60% of all products on supermarket shelves could are being developed for salt resistance, so that they can be
now contain some GM soya. (6) Monsanto, a major GM grown in previously unusable areas. But what if their seeds
manufacturer, has developed a strain of GM soya which is were to be carried to a saltmarsh? Would they be a threat to
resistant to Roundup, its own brand of herbicide. This allows wild species that have lived there naturally for years? (13)
weeds to be controlled even after the soya has started to
grow, saving an estimated 33% on the amount of herbicide So far, there is no evidence of GM foods being harmful to
used. (9) Roundup Ready® soya amounted to 15% of the 1997 humans, but the rules governing their testing are less strict
US soya crop. than with medicines, and after BSE, we know that ‘no scientific
evidence of harm’ is not the same as ‘safe to eat’. (11)
GM foods have been largely accepted by the Americans, with
nearly 70% of them saying that they would buy GM foods Source: adapted from Young People’s Trust for the Environment
even if they were simply engineered to stay fresh for longer. https://ypte.org.uk/factsheets/genetically-modified-foods/genetically-
(7) Even more would purchase foods modified to resist insect modified-foods
pests, resulting in less use of pesticides. (10)
6.2 Example response
The purpose of this section is to help guide you through the process of writing a
summary of this passage.
First, we will look at the thought processes of a student approaching the task and
relate these to the highlighted sections.
Next we will make numbered notes of the main points to be included.
Finally, we will produce an example of a final summarised version of the points
required by the question.
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6 More complex summary questions
Thought processes
Sections of the passage highlighted in yellow are commented on below.
1 The title of the passage is a useful way of finding an overview; however, does
it match the requirements of the question? In this case it does for two-thirds
of the topic of the summary so it’s useful to keep the point in mind to help
give a clear focus when writing the final version.
2 This sentence is clearly indicated as an ‘example’; it adds a further point of
information about a particular process, but when writing a summary we’re
looking to find overall points and not get bogged down in illustrations, so
it can be ignored.
3 The topic sentence is useful here – it clearly points towards the advantages of
GM foods.
4 Another example, but this can be turned round so that the general point it’s
making can be included in the summary.
5 Most of this paragraph is simply giving illustrations of different methods
of creating GM foods, but the point about saving energy can be included.
6 Again, this paragraph contains some interesting supporting details which
aren’t directly relevant, but there is another definite advantage mentioned
in the reference to saving on water in the previous paragraph.
7 This paragraph is about the popularity of GM foods and who buys them –
it’s not directly relevant to the question.
8 This is where the section about ‘concerns’ starts.
9 This account of the differences between the USA and UK needs to be looked
at carefully – the comparison itself may not be relevant to the summary
but some relevant points are being made through it which need to be
refocused.
10 The writer is making criticisms of GM farming through the questions he is
asking in this and the following paragraph – the concerns are relevant to
the summary but they must be expressed as statements and not questions.
11 The concluding paragraph includes neither concerns nor advantages –
it sums up the article itself effectively but there’s no need for a general
summing up in a summary where words are limited.
Notes
Sections of the passage highlighted in pink contain key points for the
summary.
1 GM stands for ‘genetically-modified’.
2 Scientists extract and copy genes which have a particular effect from one
plant and insert them into another organism.
3 The modifications involved are unlikely to occur naturally.
4 Another approach is to add genes from a virus to a plant so the plant
becomes resistant to the virus.
78
6.2 Example response
5 A crop can be made to grow quicker, with increased protein and vitamin
levels, or with less fat.
6 Crops can be made drought-resistant and reduce famine in developing
countries, with low rainfall and subsequent food shortages.
7 GM processes can make fresh produce last longer; it can ripen on the plant
and be transported more efficiently.
8 There is less waste in harvesting and less water is required to grow crops.
9 GM processes can also lead to savings on the amount of herbicide used.
10 Plants can be modified to resist insect pests, therefore less use of pesticides.
11 Concerns about the long-term effects.
12 In the UK the use of herbicide – or insect-resistant crops – could potentially
have severe effects on biodiversity, by virtually wiping out wild flowers and
consequently the insects that feed on them, and further up the food chain,
the predators that eat the insects.
13 We don’t know if GM plants might adversely affect indigenous plants if,
for example, seeds from plants carried into salt marshes that are modified
to be salt-resistant could be a threat to wild species that have lived there
naturally for years.
Final summary
Genetically-modified crops are those where scientists have transplanted a gene
which has a particular function in one organism into another organism; such
a modification is unlikely to occur naturally.
One advantage of this process is to make a strain of plants resistant to a virus
by adding genes from a virus to a plant. By increasing and modifying their
protein and vitamin levels, crops can be made to grow more quickly; other crops
can be made drought-resistant which can help to reduce famine in developing
countries where food is in short supply because of low rainfall.
Other advantages of genetic modification include making fresh produce last
longer and be exported more efficiently by allowing it to ripen on the plant,
creating less waste in harvesting and using less water to grow plants. Through
modification plants can be made more resistant to insect pests, resulting in
less use of pesticides.
There are, however, concerns about the unknown long-term effects in the UK.
Insect-resistant crops (along with the use of herbicides) could have serious
effects on biodiversity as destroying wild flowers could affect nature’s food
chain.
Similarly, we do not know whether GM plants might adversely affect
indigenous crops; for example, seeds from plants carried into salt marshes that
are modified to be salt-resistant, could be a threat to wild species that have lived
there naturally for years. (228 words)
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6 More complex summary questions
Unit summary
In this unit you have reviewed the objectives:
• demonstrate understanding of explicit meanings
• demonstrate understanding of implicit meanings and attitudes
• select and use information for specific purposes
• organise and structure ideas and opinions for deliberate effect
• use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures appropriate to context
• make accurate use of spelling, punctuation and grammar.
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7 Directed writing
In this unit you will:
H demonstrate understanding of explicit meanings
H demonstrate understanding of implicit meanings and attitudes
H analyse, evaluate and develop facts, ideas and opinions, using appropriate
support from the text
H articulate experience and express what is thought, felt and imagined
H organise and structure ideas and opinions for deliberate effect
H use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures appropriate to context
H use register appropriate to context
H make accurate use of spelling, punctuation and grammar.
This unit will focus on the following skills:
Reading
H demonstrate understanding of written texts, and of the words and phrases
within them
H summarise and use material for a specific context
H develop, analyse and evaluate facts, ideas and opinions
H demonstrate understanding of how writers achieve their effects and
influence readers
H select appropriate information for specific purposes
H recognise and respond to linguistic devices, including figurative language.
Writing
H express what is thought, felt and imagined
H organise and convey facts, ideas and opinions effectively
H demonstrate a varied vocabulary appropriate to the context
H demonstrate an effective use of sentence structures
H demonstrate an understanding of audience, purpose and form
H demonstrate accuracy in spelling, punctuation and grammar.
81
7 Directed writing
Key terms Introduction
Extended response Directed writing tests both writing and reading skills and requires you to write
for a specified audience and to use a particular genre for your response. This unit
to reading: contains advice on:
Questions are
based on a reading » writing a persuasive article
passage and you » writing a report
should use details » writing a continuation of a story
included in the » writing a leaflet.
passage to show
your understanding 7.1 Applying your reading skills: directed
of them by developing writing
on information given.
There are three types of writing task that you may be asked to respond to in your
Directed writing English studies:
task: An exercise » As an extended response to reading or a directed writing task.
that requires you » As a composition task.
to choose relevant » As part of your coursework portfolio.
details from a
stimulus passage Remember
and to focus your Directed writing tasks also assess your reading skills and separate criteria apply for the
response on a assessment of both your reading and writing skills.
specified audience
and to write in a Unit 3 concentrates on the skills you need for successful summary writing, and gives
suggested or genre. advice about composition and coursework items.
Composition task:
A composition task 7.2 What is meant by directed writing?
is a piece of writing
such as an essay or In this unit, we shall look at some specific forms of directed writing.
narrative in which ‘Directed writing’ means that you are given a clear framework for your writing. You
you respond to a
given topic in an will be given some material to read and the writing task will be very closely linked
original way, using to this.
your own ideas and
imagination. Some directed writing tasks are concerned primarily with testing how well you
have understood a passage of text.
Coursework
portfolio: If you Note
are entered for
the Coursework All directed writing and extended responses to reading tasks will provide you with a
component of context for what you write, as well as an audience and the genre which you should
an IGCSE® use. It is important to keep all these points in mind when answering the questions so
examination, that what you write is in an appropriate tone and register. For the extended response to
your portfolio will reading (Paper 1) the most likely genres that you will be required to use are reports,
comprise the three magazine articles, journal entries, speech, interviews, leaflets or the continuation of a
assignments that story. The type of writing required could be persuasive, informative or argumentative.
you submit for final For the directed task in Paper 2, the genres are likely to be a speech, letter or article.
moderation.
7.3 Writing a persuasive article
Key terms
A persuasive article must be clear and well structured. For example, you might
Genre: A category well start with a point, develop it and then return to it in the last sentences to
of literature: play, emphasise that it is the important point of the article.
novel and so on.
Persuasive article:
Persuasive writing
is that produced
by writers who
are using all their
skills to encourage
readers to agree with
their point of view.
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7.3 Writing a persuasive article
Key terms A certain amount of bias is likely in a persuasive article. For instance, a report on
a football match written for the local newspaper of the home side might be rather
Bias: The different from a report written for the local newspaper of the away side. It might be
presentation of a different in the claims it makes about which individuals played best, who tried
prejudiced view of a hardest, or what the highlights of the match were.
topic.
Quotation: A However, if an article is too obviously biased, no one will take it seriously, so
quotation is when a you have to include some convincing facts, not just opinions. The persuasiveness
word or phrase from depends on the facts you select and how clearly you present them.
a text is included in
a reader’s answer Quotations can be used effectively in a persuasive piece, so long as you select
to a question in those which support the point of view you want to put across.
order to support
a point being Exercise 1
made. The word or
phrase should be Here is a short example of persuasive writing, taken from a website for car
indicated by the use enthusiasts. Read through it and then answer the following questions.
of quotation marks
(inverted commas). 1 Write down the reasons the writer gives for banning cars from city centres, using
your own words.
2 How successful do you think the writer has been in convincing his readers to
share his point of view? You should consider the language he uses and the
examples he gives (and keep in mind that the website is for motorists).
Three good reasons cars
should be banned from cities
There have been some proposals lately altogether, or transform them into large
calling for the end of traffic in some walkways for city-goers.
cities by the year 2034. In order to If you ever go to a large city centre, you By the end of it all, you’re ready to
get rid of all this traffic, governments often realize the difficulty some people drive off a cliff. But why go through
are planning to take away one of its have with sidewalk-to-sidewalk travel. this hassle? If we do away with cars
biggest contributors — cars. But is If you live in LA, people mostly don’t throughout major cities, it gives drivers
this a good idea? Our initial knee-jerk know how to walk, and if you live in the opportunity to actually enjoy their
reaction was NO-NO-NO. They’re taking NYC, there are so many people crossing vehicles on (more) open roads. It’s
away our cars and now they’re driving in such a small area, that it’s often a strange thought, yes, but anyone
themselves? Oh the insult! But when difficult to figure out what exactly is will tell you, especially someone who
you ponder the issue a little longer, you even going on. But if cities begin to do drives a manual — city centres are like
have to consider how horrible it is to away with cars, we’d see an increase
drive into a very crowded city centre in out-of-town travellers more willing
— London, LA, Miami? I’d say very. So to walk about civic centres in safety.
should cars be abolished from cities We could also see an increase in short-
altogether? Yes, and here’s why: distance transportation, private and
As mentioned previously, the one public — bikes, cable cars, subways, driving in hell.
thing that plagues most big cities etc. Jeff Perez
is the incessant traffic. City layouts
simply aren’t built to manage that The one thing that irks just about any Source: adapted from www.motor1.com/
many moving parts. Take away roads driver is the thought of being stuck in news/72063/3-good-reasons-cars-should-be-
gridlock traffic in the centre of town. banned-from-cities
83
7 Directed writing
This article and the comments that follow are an example of some key features of
persuasive writing.
Three reasons why you
shouldn’t use plastic
bags
Plastic bags are a huge problem. They harm animals out cheaper – so the more you use
(1) According to the Just Say No them the less you pay! (6)
campaign, a Sustainability Victoria As plastic bags are lightweight and
initiative against plastic bag usage in float easily, this means they can Tasmanian residents are in effect
Australia, approximately 80 million travel long distances when picked paying less for their goods compared
plastic bags litter the environment up by the wind. Often, the bags will to some of the rest of the country, due
every year. (2) fall along the coast and other areas to the state-wide ban on plastic bags
of animal habitats, which creatures in retail. Tasmanian Plastic Shopping
On average, plastic bags take 1000 then attempt to eat, only to choke and Bags Ban Act 2013 intends to legally
years to break down, meaning this is eventually starve to death. After the reduce plastic bag usage and increase
a problem that won’t go away anytime animal carcass has rotted away, the awareness of other green alternative
soon. Therefore, people the world over bag is normally released – only for the options.
are being encouraged to adopt new whole process to be repeated again.
methods of carrying products, such as Source: adapted from www.onyalife.com/
reusable bags, to cut down on plastic Removing plastic bags from our reusable-bags/3-reasons-why-you-
consumption. While many people society will not only rid us of waste shouldnt-use-plastic-bags
understand that plastic carrier bags and unnecessary expense, it will
are bad for the environment, what also help to protect our wildlife and
exactly makes them so harmful? (3) landscape for which Australia is
renowned. (5) According to Animals
They create litter Australia, a national animal welfare
charity, 100 000 animals are killed by
The Northern Territory Environmental plastic bags every year.
Protection Authority states that litter
collection – of which plastic bags are They are expensive
a major contributor – costs Australian
governments $200 million each The idea that plastic bags are a
year. This is a colossal amount of freebie when doing your weekly shop
money, and if plastic bag usage was or other activities is a fallacy. The
decreased, it’s also likely that the production price is often incorporated
amount spent on cleaning up litter into taxes and other fees, meaning
would go down too. that the price of your groceries,
clothes and other items increases
This would free the environment of to factor in these associated costs.
toxic materials and other related This suggests that although eco-
issues caused by excessive plastic friendly bags may seem initially more
use, as well as making our planet a expensive, in the long run they work
prettier place to live. (4)
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7.3 Writing a persuasive article
Comments
N.B. This is an article from an Australian website.
1 The subject matter and the writer’s point of view are stated very clearly and
directly in the heading and the short, focused opening sentence.
2 A factual, statistical detail is used to reinforce the point made earlier – the huge
size of the problem (‘approximately 80 million’) also adds emphasis.
3 The writer uses a rhetorical question as a way of gaining the reader’s support for
his argument.
4 The introduction of a positive outcome for the proposal to ban plastic bags is an
effective way of moving the argument on.
5 The writer now appeals to our concern for wildlife and reinforces it by appealing
to his readers’ sense of national pride.
6 In case the readers might be thinking, ‘What has this got to do with me?’, the
writer introduces an argument to show them how the problem affects their own
finances.
Read carefully the following extract from a website ‘Threatened Species’. Then complete
the task that follows.
Threatened Species
Nearly one-quarter of the world’s known mammal species Conservation Union). This suggests that earlier estimates of
are threatened with extinction or are already extinct the number of endangered species must have been too low.
according to a recent study compiled by the IUCN (World
The latest update in a series known as The Red List,
the report is the most comprehensive
evaluation of globally threatened animals
ever compiled, and the first to assess all
known mammal species.
Until now, birds were the only group fully
assessed. With 12% of all bird species
facing the threat of extinction and
70% experiencing population declines,
scientists had relied largely on the status
of birds as an indicator of the level of
threat to all terrestrial life forms.
The number of mammals on The Red
List – a shocking 1219 of the 5487
known species – has spurred calls for
an intensified international focus on
biodiversity loss. The report also found
that nearly half of all 414 primate species
are at risk, much more than thought in
previous estimates.
The new survey was compiled using a
revised set of criteria, which the authors
85
7 Directed writing
described as more objective than those used in previous significant factor threatening the survival of species: the
estimates, to determine the threat of extinction. The Red destruction of habitat brought about by human population
List recognises three distinct categories of risk: of the growth and economic development.
mammals considered threatened, 188 species are listed
as ‘critically endangered’, 448 as ‘endangered’, and 505 as Other contributing factors, he said, include pollution,
‘vulnerable’. Each classification is largely determined by the overharvesting, and the introduction of foreign species. At
rate of a species’ population decline over the past 10 years, current rates of decline, biologists fear that many mammals
as well as the number of surviving adults and the stability with niches or habitat needs that conflict with human
of habitat. development may soon come to depend on the tinkering
hand of wildlife management and captive breeding – unable
George Rabb, ex-chair of the IUCN species survival to exist without human intervention.
commission which compiled the list, said that the report
should serve as a ‘red flag’, focusing attention on the most Source: The Worldwatch Institute, www.worldwatch.org,
IUCN Red List, www.iucnredlist.org, 2008
Exercise 2
Using the information in the article above as a basis for your argument, write a
persuasive article for a magazine aimed at teenagers to encourage your readers to
help save animals threatened by extinction.
Key terms 7.4 Writing a report
Journalistic: The key to writing a successful report is to organise your facts clearly. A report
Written using concentrates primarily on information, though it may well be leading to a particular
the language conclusion or opinion.
and register of a » Use headings to make it clear what your main points are: start with one major
newspaper report.
Headline: A line heading, and use others to divide your writing into short sections.
of words usually » Before you start writing, decide on the headings you want to use and make lists
printed in large
letters as the title under these headings; this will help to ensure that in your final piece the facts
of a story in a are presented in an organised way.
newspaper. » The sections or paragraphs of a report should be shorter than they usually are
Tone: The mood when you are writing stories or compositions. This helps the reader to assess the
implied by a piece information quickly.
of writing, conveyed » A report is written for a particular readership. Make sure you know whom the
through the writer’s readership is before you start.
choice of words,
sentence structures Writing a journalistic report
and so on.
Transcript: A The key points given above about report writing also apply to the writing of
written or printed journalistic (news or magazine) reports. However, journalistic reports have a few
version of words special features:
that were originally » They usually start with a headline. Choose one that sets the tone for what comes
spoken.
Verbatim: In exactly after – are you reporting a tragic or shocking event, or a funny or surprising
the same words as event, or are you giving a straightforward account of a recent political decision,
were used originally. for example?
» A journalistic report often contains transcripts (written records) of interviews, or
86 extracted quotes from those, which are reported verbatim (word for word). If you
choose to use this technique you must either use speech marks correctly or turn
the interview into reported speech.
Look at the key features of a news report, highlighted in this article.
This type of article 7.4 Writing a report
needs a headline.
MIRACLE ESCAPE AT BUSY
CROSSING
There is an At midday today, a cyclist who lost control of his bicycle narrowly missed death as
introductory he swerved round an articulated lorry and a small car. The small car subsequently
paragraph, which hit a lamp post but fortunately no one was injured. Chaos was caused when the
summarises the lorry shed part of its load.
content.
The incident happened when Inderjit car swerved to the right, hitting a lamp
Paragraphs are short, Singh, 32, of 46 Victory Road, found that post. The car is a write-off, but I think that
much shorter than in the brakes on his bicycle had failed. ‘I was I am all right.’
a piece of continuous riding quickly towards the junction and the
writing. traffic lights were red. It is all downhill you The police were called to the scene as
know. When I applied my brakes, nothing traffic was brought to a standstill. The
Articles of this type happened. I just went hurtling towards the lorry shed part of its load of colourful
gain enormously from junction.’ mechanical toy animals, some of which
quotations from the were set in motion by the accident and
people involved.
The driver of the lorry, Wing Koh, 45, of 123 caused bystanders much amusement.
Extracted quotes give
the reader a quick Main Street, was moving away from the no prosecution
guide. lights when he saw Inderjit Singh. He said
that he had no chance to avoid the cyclist An official statement from the police
who managed to avoid him by executing revealed that no one would be prosecuted
a smart manoeuvre. Wing Koh added that as a result of the incident. Inderjit Singh
as the front of his lorry swooped round, he thanked the police for their assistance and
found himself heading for a small yellow said that he was happy to be alive.
car travelling in the opposite direction.
The Member of Parliament for the area,
‘a write-off’ says visitor who strongly supports environmental
issues, tweeted: ‘Another near fatality
The driver of the car, Rejoice Ntuli, a visitor caused by too much traffic in the city.
to our city, was only just able to avoid the Something must be done!’
cyclist. ‘I braked hard,’ she said, ‘and my
Now read through the following article about the discovery of the wreck of the
Titanic and answer the question that follows.
87
7 Directed writing
The Discovery of the Titanic
Our second view of the Titanic was breathtaking. As we looking like long icicles. I subsequently dubbed them
glided across the bottom, out of the darkness loomed ‘rusticles’, a name which seems to have stuck.
the vertical knife-edge of the bow – the great ship
towered above us and suddenly it seemed to be coming These rust features turned out to be very fragile. If
right at us, about to run our little submarine down. touched by ‘Alvin’ (that was the name we called our
Gently we brought the sub closer until we could see the sub), or dislodged by the thrust from one of our
bow more clearly. It was buried more than 20 metres in propellers, they disappeared in a cloud of smoke. And
bottom mud. Both anchors still hung in place. once the foamy crust had been knocked away, the steel
beneath appeared almost perfectly preserved, only
Rivers of rust covered the side of the ship, some of it slightly pitted.
running the full length of the exposed vertical hull
plating and pouring out over the bottom sediment Carefully I counted the portholes aft from the anchor
where it formed great ponds as much as thirty to 12 to locate the position where the ship’s name should be,
metres across. The blood of the great ship lay in pools but I could see nothing.
on the ocean floor. Then, as we rose in slow motion up
the ghostly wall of the port bow, our running lights Alvin rose farther, cleared the railing forward of No. 1
reflected off the still unbroken glass of the portholes in hatch, and we manoeuvred in over the Titanic’s mighty
a way that made me think of eyes gleaming in the dark. forward deck. All at once I was forcibly struck by the
In places, the rust about them formed eyelashes, sheer size of everything: giant bollards, the huge links
sometimes tears: as though the Titanic were weeping of the anchor chains, and even bigger shiny bronze-
over her fate. Near the upper railing – still largely intact topped capstans. Until now the ship for me had been
– reddish-brown stalactites of rust, the result of rust- somehow ghostly, distant, incorporeal. Now it was
eating bacteria, hung down as much as several metres, very close, very real.
I strained to get a look at the deck’s wooden planking
just a metre or so below us. Then my heart dropped.
Gone was any hope of finding much Titanic woodwork
intact, her beauty unblemished by the years. Except for
a few fragments here and there, the wood was replaced
by thousands upon thousands of small, white, hollow
calcareous tubes a few centimetres in length – the
protective home of wood-boring molluscs.
I began to wonder whether the metal sub-deck would
support us when Alvin made her first landing.
Source: The Discovery of the Titanic by Robert Ballard, Orion, 1995
Exercise 3
Imagine you are Robert Ballard, the author of the article above. You are taking part
in an interview for a radio news programme. The interviewer asks for your thoughts
as to whether the Titanic can and should be raised from the sea bed.
Write the words of your report, in which you give details of the condition and
situation of the Titanic and your recommendations as to why there should or should
not be an attempt made to raise it.
88
7.5 Writing a continuation of a story
Key terms 7.5 Writing a continuation of a story
Continuation: To Another directed writing question which you may be set is to write a continuation of a
write your own story. There are a few important points to keep in mind when tackling this type of task.
ending of a story
based on the ideas, The person reading your response will not have a list of key points of content
both explicit and that they will expect you to include. However, they will expect you to follow certain
implicit, contained conventions. The main ones are listed below.
in the original
extract. » Remember that whatever you write, the continuation of a story must be relevant
Pointers: These are to the ideas in the passage you have already read. Occasionally, students try to
hints in the original use this type of task as an opportunity to repeat a composition they have written
text which suggest during their course, even though it has very little connection with the subject
how the author may of the story. This approach is not advised as it is almost certain that you will be
intend to continue found out. (Incidentally, this point about relevance applies equally to continuous
the story. writing in Unit 12.)
» Your continuation should make use of the pointers contained in the original story
and lead towards a conclusion which could convincingly follow on from what you
have already read. Try to ensure that the way you write about the characters in
the story is consistent with what you already know about them. Read the original
story carefully to make sure you pick up any hints that indicate how events are
likely to develop.
» Remember to continue the story by using the same narrative conventions as the
original. For example, if the original story was written in the first person (‘I did’,
etc.) then your continuation should also be written in the first person. You should
also make sure that you use the same tense as that used in the original story.
» As far as possible, you should try to write in a similar style to that of the original.
Some attempt to follow the type of sentence structures, adjectives, similes and
metaphors used by the author of the original will be seen as a positive feature of
your writing.
Example of a continuation of a story question
Exercise 4
Here is an example of a question requiring you to continue a story. The story is set in Trinidad and tells
of the potentially disastrous effects of a drought on local farmers. A typical exam question on this story
would be:
‘After another month the rains came.’ Continue the story until the moment the rainclouds appear.
• Make Manko the main character.
• Use what you have learned about Manko, his family and life in the village.
• Write between a page and a page and a half.
1 Read through the story and the question carefully. As you do so, make notes of details in the
story that would be relevant to use when writing your own continuation. You should also consider
closely the language and style in which the original is written and think about features of it which
you could adapt in your continuation. In particular, you should decide how your continuation will
end.
2 Next, read through the student’s response that follows on page 91. How far do you think this
clarifies the points that were made in the introduction to this section?
3 Finally, compare your notes with the Teacher’s comments on the student’s response. (All spelling
and punctuation mistakes have been corrected in the student’s response in order to allow you to
concentrate on the content and style of the story.)
89
7 Directed writing
A Drink of Water ‘Boil the water first before drinking!’
was the warning cry. But even so two
The time when the rains didn’t come diseased. When the wind blew, it was children were dead and many more
for three months and the sun was a heavy and unrelieving, as if the heat were on the sick list, their parents too
yellow furnace in the sky was known had taken all the spirit out of it. But poor to seek medical aid in the city
as the Great Drought in Trinidad. It Manko still opened his shirt and thirty kilometres away.
happened when everyone was turned his chest to it when it passed.
expecting the sky to burst open with Manko sat in the shade of a mango
rain to fill the dry streams and water He was a big man, grown brown and tree and tried to look on the bright side
the parched earth. burnt from years of working on the of things. Such a dry season meant
land. His arms were bent and he had a that the land would be good for corn
But each day was the same; the sun crouching position even when he seeds when the rains came. He and his
rose early in a blue sky, and all day stood upright. When he laughed he wife Rannie had been working hard
long the farmers lifted their eyes, showed more tobacco stain than teeth. and saving money with the hope of
wondering what had happened to sending Sunny, their son, to college in
Parjanya, the rain god. They rested on But Manko had not laughed for a long the city.
their hoes and forks and wrung time. Bush fires had swept Las Lomas
perspiration from their clothes, seeing and left the garden plots charred and Rannie told Manko: ‘We poor, and we
no hope in labour, terrified by the smoking. Cattle were dropping dead in ain’t have no education, but is all right,
thought that if no rain fell soon they the heat. There was scarcely any we go get old soon and dead, and what
would lose their crops and livestock water in the village; the river was dry we have to think about is the boy. We
and face starvation and death. with scummy mud. But with patience must let him have plenty learning and
one could collect a bucket of water. come a big man in Trinidad.’
In the tiny village of Las Lomas, out in Boiled, with a little sugar to make it
his vegetable garden, Manko licked drinkable, it had to do. And Manko, proud of his son, used to
dry lips and passed a wet sleeve over boast in the evening, when the
his dripping face. Somewhere in the Sometimes, when the children knew villagers got together to talk and
field a cow mooed mournfully, sniffing that someone had gone to the river for smoke, that one day Sunny would be a
around for a bit of green in the cracked water, they hung about in the village lawyer or a doctor.
earth. The field was a desolation of main road waiting with bottles and
drought. The trees were naked and calabash shells, and they fell upon the But optimism was difficult now. His
barks peeled off trunks as if they were water-carrier as soon as he hove in livestock was dying out, and the
sight. market was glutted with yams. He had
a great pile in the yard which he could
not sell. Manko took a look at his plot
of land and shook his head. There was
no sense in working any more today.
He took his cutlass and hoe and
calabash shell which had a string so he
could hold it dangling. He shook it,
and realised with burning in his throat
that it was empty, though he had left a
few mouthfuls in it. He was a fool; he
should have known that the heat
would dry it up if he took it out in the
garden with him. He licked his lips
and, shouldering the tools, walked
slowly down the winding path which
led to his hut.
Source: A Drink of Water by
Samuel Selvon, Nelson Thornes, 1968
90
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Cambridge IGCSE First Language English
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