Chapter 8: ԓ e Comparison and Contrast Essay 155 Writing: Comparison and Contrast Very oϏ en, a writing assignment will require you to compare and contrast two things, places, or people. In your history class, you might be asked to compare and contrast the Greek and Roman empires; in your biology class, you might be required to compare and contrast DNA and RNA. Comparing and contrasting is a process we all do every day. ԓ is table shows some purposes for comparing and contrasting, along with examples of each purpose. Purpose Examples To determine the superiority of one thing over another Decide which car to buy by comparing features. Persuade others to vote for a political candidate by contrasting her plans with her opponent’s plans. To explain something that is unknown by comparing it to something that is known Explain what a barometer is by comparing it to a thermometer, but explain that it measures atmospheric pressure instead of temperature. Describe how an electric car works by contrasting its function with that of a gasoline-powered car. To show that two apparently similar things are in fact quite diʹ erent or to show that two apparently dissimilar things are quite similar Discover that two very diʹ erent cultures have some important things in common. Show how an author’s new book or a musical group’s new album is surprisingly diʹ erent from the last one. To show how something or someone has changed Contrast how a favorite holiday was celebrated when you were a child with how that holiday is celebrated now. Compare and contrast Haiti before and after the earthquake in 2010. However, there is one thing to keep in mind: With comparison and contrast, the purpose is not just to point out similarities and diԗ erences but also to persuade, explain, or inform. ԓ ink about comparison and contrast as a method of development—not as a purpose for writing. 96
156 ReDz ning Composition Skills Points of Comparison Let us suppose you are asked to compare and contrast two people—perhaps two teachers or two politicians. What would you compare and contrast about them? You could compare their looks, backgrounds, philosophies, the way they treat people, their intelligence, their lifestyles, and so on. ԓ e list could continue, but this is just the problem—you would have an endless list. When comparing and contrasting two things, people, countries, and so forth, especially for a standard 300- to 500-word essay, it is best to limit yourself to two to four points of comparison that will support the central idea in your essay. For example, if you wanted to compare two politicians in order to show that one is better as a public servant, you would not discuss their tastes in food because this point would be irrelevant. EXERCISE 3 For each thesis statement, add additional relevant points of comparison or contrast. 1. It may seem that learning in a classroom and learning online are vastly diʹ erent, but after taking an online class, I realized that they share several basic features. a. The syllabus tells you what is expected. b. It is important to keep up with the reading and assignments. c. Class participation matters. d. 2. It is true that driving a car oʹ ers a lot of personal freedom, but since I sold my car, I have found that public transportation oʹ ers me many advantages. a. Helps me to keep to a schedule b. Is less stressful c. d. 3. While many of the subjects covered in high school and college are the same, the expectations of how students must study are very diʹ erent. a. Amount of required reading b. c. d. Emphasis on Comparison or Contrast In a comparison and contrast essay, you usually emphasize either comparison or contrast depending on your purpose. If you are comparing two rather similar things, you should acknowledge the obvious similarities but focus on the diԗ erences. If you are comparing two obviously dissimilar things, you should acknowledge the obvious contrasts but emphasize the less obvious similarities. 97
Chapter 8: ԓ e Comparison and Contrast Essay 157 Patterns of Organization ԓ ere are two basic patterns of organization for developing a comparison and contrast essay. Although they are called by various names, we will call Pattern A the Point-by-Point organization and Pattern B the All of One/All of the Other organization. To show how these patterns work, let’s consider the topic of two automobiles: the Road Runner XL and the Speed Demon 280. Your points of comparison might be the cost of maintenance, performance, and comfort. Pattern A (Point-by-Point) In this pattern, each point of comparison is discussed separately. Study the following organization. ԓ esis Statement: ԓ e Speed Demon is a better car than the Road Runner. I. Cost of Maintenance A. ԓ e Road Runner B. ԓ e Speed Demon II. Performance A. ԓ e Road Runner B. ԓ e Speed Demon III. Comfort A. ԓ e Road Runner B. ԓ e Speed Demon Pattern A (Point-by-Point) is useful for organizing complex topics. It is an easy pattern to follow because the comparison/contrast is made clear throughout the essay. For example, a paragraph comparing the cost of maintenance of the two automobiles might be developed as follows: ԓ e Road Runner and the Speed Demon diԗ er in cost of maintenance. ԓ e Road Runner is rather expensive to maintain. ԓ is car gets poor mileage, with 23 miles per gallon on the highway and 18 miles per gallon in the city. Moreover, it requires the more expensive premium gasoline. In addition, the Road Runner needs a tune-up every four months and an oil change every 90 days. ԓ e average driver who owns a Road Runner must pay approximately $1,400 a year to keep this car running. ԓ e Speed Demon, on the other hand, is quite economical. It gets an impressive 38 miles per gallon on the highway and 34 in the city, and unlike the Road Runner, the Speed Demon takes the less costly regular gasoline. In addition, whereas the Road Runner requires tune-ups and oil changes, the Speed Demon requires little maintenance. It needs to be tuned up only every 12 months; the oil needs to be changed only every four months. In summary, instead of paying $1,400 per year to keep the car running, the owner of a Speed Demon spends only $600, which is signiDz cantly less. 98
158 ReDz ning Composition Skills ԓ e previous paragraph can be outlined as follows: I. ԓ e Road Runner and the Speed Demon diԗ er in cost of maintenance. A. ԓ e Road Runner is rather expensive to maintain. 1. Mileage 2. Tune-ups 3. Oil changes 4. Average cost of maintenance B. ԓ e Speed Demon is economical to maintain. 1. Mileage 2. Tune-ups 3. Oil changes 4. Average cost of maintenance Because the paragraph is rather long, it is even possible to break it into two paragraphs, with two controlling ideas: (1) “ԓ e Road Runner is rather expensive to maintain” and (2) “ԓ e Speed Demon, on the other hand, is quite economical.” EXERCISE 4 WRITING Study the information below about the Road Runner and the Speed Demon. Write a controlling idea about the diʹ erence in comfort. Then write a paragraph comparing and contrasting the comfort of the two cars. The Road Runner The Speed Demon Interior Spacious; ample head and leg room in both front and back. Two people can sit comfortably in the front and three in the back. Interior Tight; ample head and leg room in front but cramped in the back. Two people can š t comfortably in front, but only two can sit comfortably in back. Seats Although the seats are large, they are vinyl and get hot in the summer. Seats Leather seats are cool in the summer and pleasant all year round. Cooling and heating The air conditioner does not cool the back seat area; the heater is eʹ ective. Cooling and heating Excellent air-conditioning and heating system. The air conditioner cools the entire car rapidly; the heater is equally eʹ ective. 99
Chapter 8: ԓ e Comparison and Contrast Essay 159 Pattern B (All of One/All of the Other) In this pattern, each item is discussed separately. Notice the organization. ԓ esis Statement: ԓ e Speed Demon is a better car than the Road Runner. I. ԓ e Road Runner A. Cost of Maintenance B. Performance C. Comfort II. ԓ e Speed Demon A. Cost of Maintenance B. Performance C. Comfort Note that the points of comparison are the same and that they are discussed in the same order under each section in both patterns of organization. Pattern B is useful for more limited topics. Using the Two Patterns of Comparison and Contrast in Essays ԓ e two patterns—“point-by-point” and “all of one/all of the other”—can also be used to write both paragraphs and essays. Typically, you will devote one paragraph to each of the points of comparison. Of course, in the essay, you will provide signiDz cantly more support through examples, facts, and details than in a paragraph. EXERCISE 5 Read this student essay about two brothers. As you read, notice how the tension between East and West is used to help the reader envision the diʹ erences between the brothers. Then answer the questions that follow. My Two Brothers 1. No two people are exactly alike, and my two older brothers, Nhan and Hung, are no exceptions. When I think of them, I think of Rudyard Kipling’s words: East is East, and West is West, and never the twain shall meet. 2. Even though they have the same parents, their considerable diԗ erences in looks, personality, and attitude toward life reѣ ect the diԗ erences between Eastern and Western cultures. 3. Like the majority of Asian men, Nhan is short, small, and has a full, moon-shaped face. His smooth white skin and small arms and feet make him continued 100
160 ReDz ning Composition Skills look somewhat delicate. Nhan always likes to wear formal, traditional clothes. For example, on great holidays or at family rite celebrations, Nhan appears in the traditional black gown, white pants and black silky headband, all of which make him look like an early twentieth-century intellectual. 4. In contrast to Nhan, Hung, who is his younger brother by ten years, looks more like an American boxer. He is tall, muscular, and big-boned. He is built straight as an arrow, and his face is long and angular as a Western character. Unlike Nhan, Hung has strong feet and arms, and whereas Nhan has smooth skin, Hung’s shoulders and chest are hairy, large and full. Unlike Nhan, too, Hung likes to wear comfortable T-shirts and jeans or sports clothes. At a formal occasion, instead of wearing traditional formal clothes, Hung wears stylish Western style suits. 5. Nhan and Hung also diԗer in personality. I don’t know how my father selected their names correctly to reѣ ect their personalities. Nhan’s name means “patience,” and his patience is shown in his smile. He has the smile of an ancient Chinese philosopher that Western people can never understand. He always smiles. He smiles because he wants to make the other person happy or to make himself happy. He smiles whenever people speak to him, regardless of whether they are right or wrong. He smiles when he forgives people who have wronged him. Nhan likes books, of course, and literature and philosophy. He likes to walk in the moonlight to think. Nhan also enjoys drinking hot tea and singing verses. In short, in our family, Nhan is the son who provides a good example of Dz lial piety and tolerance. 6. Hung, on the other hand, does not set a good example of traditional respectful behavior for his brothers and sisters. His name means “strength,” but his strength is self-centered. As a result, unlike Nhan, Hung only smiles when he is happy. When he talks to people, he looks at their faces. Because of this, my eldest brother Nhan considers him very impolite. As one might expect, Hung does not like philosophy and literature; instead, he studies science and technology. Whereas Nhan enjoys tea and classical verses, Hung prefers to sunbathe and drink Coca-Cola while he listens to rock and roll music. And like many American youths, Hung is independent; in fact, he loves his independence more than he loves his family. He wants to move out of our house and live in an apartment by himself. He is such an individualist that all the members in my family say that he is very selDz sh. 7. My brothers’ diԗ erences do not end with their looks and personalities. Concerning their attitudes toward life, they are as diԗ erent as the moon and the sun. My eldest brother Nhan is concerned with spiritual values. He is aԗ ected by Confucian, Taoist, and Buddhist theories. ԓ ese theories suggest that the human life is not happy. ԓ erefore, if a man wants to be happy, he should get out of the competitiveness of life and should not depend on material objects. For example, if a man is not anxious to have a new-model car, he does not have to worry about how to make money to buy one. And, if he does not have a car, he does not have to worry about the cost of gas. My oldest brother is deeply aԗ ected by these theories, so he never tries hard to make money to buy conveniences. continued 101
Chapter 8: ԓ e Comparison and Contrast Essay 161 8. In contrast to Nhan, my brother Hung believes that science and technology serve human beings and that the West defeated the East because the West was further advanced in these Dz elds. ԓ erefore, each person must compete with nature and with other people in the world in order to acquire diԗ erent conveniences such as cars, washing machines, and television sets. Hung is aԗ ected by the Western theories of real values; consequently, he always works hard to make his own money to satisfy his material needs. 9. In accordance with the morality of the culture of my country, I cannot say which one of my brothers is wrong or right. But I do know that they both want to improve and maintain human life on this earth. I am very lucky to inherit both sources of thought from my two older brothers. 1. What is the thesis of the essay? What are its points of comparison? 2. Does the essay focus more on comparison or on contrast? 3. Which pattern of organization does the writer follow? Why was this pattern selected? 4. Does the essay have topic sentences that state the controlling idea for each point of comparison? If so, what are they? 5. Is the conclusion logical? 6. Make an outline of the essay. EXERCISE 6 WRITING Choose one of the following topics for a comparison and contrast essay. Then brainstorm a list of similarities and a list of diʹ erences. Use your lists to choose three or four points of comparison. Write a thesis statement with a controlling idea that relates to these points of comparison. Draft the essay using Pattern A to organize your essay. 1. Two educational systems that you are familiar with, such as the university system in two diʹ erent countries, or high school as opposed to college. 2. Two people or two products (such as two diʹ erent automobiles, cameras, cell phones, or mp3 players). EXERCISE 7 In “My Old Neighborhood,” the writer evokes the feelings of disappointment that come from seeing favorite childhood memories through adult eyes. Read the essay and answer the questions that follow. My Old Neighborhood 1. Several years ago, I returned to Washington, D.C., and visited one of my old neighborhoods. I had not been on Nash Street for more than 20 years and as I walked along the street, my mind was ѣ ooded by waves of nostalgia. I saw the old apartment building where I had lived and the playground where I had played. continued 102
162 ReDz ning Composition Skills As I viewed these once-familiar surroundings, images of myself as a child there came to mind. However, what I saw and what I remembered were not the same. I sadly realized that the best memories are those leϏ undisturbed. 2. As I remember my old apartment building, it was bright and alive. When I was a child, the apartment building was more than just a place to live. It was a medieval1 castle, a pirate’s den, a space station, or whatever my young mind could imagine. I would steal away with my friends and play in the basement. ԓ is was always exciting because it was so cool and dark, and there were so many things there to hide among. Our favorite place to play was the coal bin. We would always use it as our rocket ship because the coal chute could be used as an escape hatch out of the basement into “outer space.” 3. All of my memories were not conDz ned to the apartment building, however. I have memories of many adventures outside of the building, also. My mother restricted how far we could go from the apartment building, but this placed no restrictions on our exploring instinct. ԓ ere was a small branch2 in back of the building where my friends and I would play. We enjoyed it there because honeysuckles grew there. We would go there to lie in the shade and suck the sweet-smelling honeysuckles.3 Our biggest thrill in the branch was the day the police caught an alligator there. I did not see the alligator, and I was not there when they caught it, but just the thought of an alligator in the branch was exciting. 4. ԓ is is how I remembered the old neighborhood; however, as I said, this is not how it was when I saw it again. 1medieval: related to the years 450 to 1450 A.D. 2branch: stream or small river 3honeysuckle: a sweet-smelling ѣ ower that grows on a vine continued 103
Chapter 8: ԓ e Comparison and Contrast Essay 163 1. What is the thesis? Where is it stated? 2. What pattern of organization does the writer use? Does he cover the same points in the š rst part as he does in the second? 3. What is the controlling idea about the apartment building as it was when the author was a child? 4. What is the controlling idea about the apartment building when he visited it 20 years later? 5. What is the controlling idea about the branch as it was when he was a child? 6. What is the controlling idea about the branch as he saw it 20 years later? 7. One of the paragraphs is only one sentence long. What function does that sentence serve? 8. Make an outline of the essay. EXERCISE 8 WRITING Choose one of the following writing assignments. Begin by prewriting to gather ideas and plan your writing. Then write a thesis statement with a controlling idea and draft the essay. 1. Have you ever visited a place you had left a long time ago and found it had changed considerably? Write an essay comparing and contrasting the “way it was” with the “way it is now.” Try to formulate a controlling idea about the change. Have things changed for the better? The worse? 2. When you were younger, you probably had several expectations about your future. Choose one to three aspects of your life and experiences now and contrast the way you thought they would be with the way they are. 5. Unlike the apartment building I remembered, this one was now rundown and in disrepair. What was once more than a place to live looked hardly worth living in. ԓ e court was dirty and broken up, and the windows of the building were all broken out. ԓ e once-clean walls were covered with graɷ ti4 and other stains. ԓ ere were no medieval knights or pirates running around the place now, nor spacemen; instead, there were a few tough looking adolescents who looked much older than their ages. 6. As for the area where I used to play, it was hardly recognizable. ԓ e branch was polluted and the honeysuckles had died. Not only were they dead, but they had been trampled to the ground. ԓ e branch itself was Dz lled with old bicycles, broken bottles, and garbage. Now, instead of Dz nding something as romantic as an alligator, one would expect to Dz nd only rats. ԓ e once sweet-smelling area now smelled horrible. ԓ e stench5 from my idyllic6 haven7 was heart wrenching. 7. I do not regret having seen my old neighborhood. However, I do not think my innocent childhood memories can ever be the same. I suppose it is true when they say, “You can never go home again.” 4 graɷ ti: words or pictures drawn on walls 5 stench: a bad smell 6 idyllic: peaceful, simple 7haven: a safe place 104
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ACTIVITY 2 | Analyzing a comparison essay This essay compares some features of Brazil and the United States. Discuss the questions below. Then read the comparison essay and answer the questions that follow. 1. How many different countries have you visited? Which of these countries felt “comfortable” to you? Which countries were very different from your own? 2. What does the word individualism mean to you? WORDS TO KNOW Essay 3.1 asset: (n) an advantage core: (n) center, essential part disruptive: (adj) troublesome, disorderly diversity: (n) variety ethnic: (adj) sharing cultural characteristics focus on: (v) to concentrate on massive: (adj) huge remarkable: (adj) amazing, extraordinary unique: (adj) one of a kind, distinctive ESSAY 3.1 Not as Different as One Would Think 1 All countries are unique. Obviously, countries are different from one another in location, size, language, government, climate, and lifestyle. Some countries, however, share some surprising similarities. In this case, Brazil and the United States come to mind. Some may think that these two nations have very little in common because they are in different hemispheresɠ. On the contrary, the two countries share many similarities. 72 UNIT 3 • Comparison Essays
2 One important similarity between Brazil and the United States is their massive size. Both Brazil and the United States are extremely large countries. Brazil covers almost half of the South American continent. It has a land mass of nearly 3.3 million square miles (8.5 million square kilometers) and is home to cosmopolitanɡ centers such as Rio de Janeiro and São Paulo. Due to its size, few Brazilians can say that they have traveled extensively within the country’s borders. Like Brazil, the United States takes up a significant portion of its continent (North America). It extends from the Atlantic Ocean to the Pacific Ocean and has a land mass of 3.1 million square miles (8 million square kilometers), not including Alaska, Hawaii, and other territories. It is home to world-famous cities such as Los Angeles and New York. As a result of its size, it is fair to say that many people in the United States have not visited much of their country. 3 Another similarity between Brazil and the United States is the diversity of the population. Brazil was colonizedɢ by Europeans, and its culture has been greatly influenced by this fact. However, Brazilians’ identity was influenced by many other cultures as well. Brazil is a “melting pot” of many ethnic groups that immigrated there and mixed with the indigenousɣ people. The United States also has a diversity of ethnic groups, from the Native American population and early colonists from northern Europe to slave groups from Africa. Later immigrants from the Mediterranean, Asia, and South America added to the diversity of its citizens. The mixture of cultures and customs has worked to form ethnically rich cultures in both countries. 4 Finally, both countries share an important value: individualism. Brazil works hard to defend the concept of freedom of choice. Citizens believe that they have the right to do and be whatever they desire as long as they do not hurt others. This attitude was introduced in the 1930s and 1940s by Brazilian President Getúlio Vargas. He was responsible for establishing an individualistic government that helped modernize and industrialize the country. Individualism is also at the core of the culture in the United States, dating back to the Declaration of Independence and the Bill of Rights. Both documents focus on individuals’ many rights. Some people may believe that the desire for individual expression is disruptive and can make a country weak. However, the ability of people to be whatever they want is an asset to both countries. 5 Although Brazil and the United States have many differences, they also have remarkable similarities in their size, ethnic diversity, and core values. Some people believe that their culture and country are without equal. However, as with these two countries, a closer inspection shows that cultures everywhere have more in common than not. 1hemisphere: half of the earth 2 cosmopolitan: international 3 colonized: settled 4 indigenous: native; original 73 106
1. What is the main purpose of this essay? Begin with The purpose is... 2. Which three things (points of development) about Brazil and the United States does this essay compare? 3. What method of organization does the writer use—point-by-point or block? 4. What is the hook for this essay? Write it here. 5. Underline the thesis statement. Is the thesis restated in the conclusion? If yes, underline the sentence that restates the thesis. 6. In Paragraph 2, the author describes the size of Brazil and the United States. List the supporting information the writer uses. 7. Reread the concluding paragraph of Essay 3.1. Does the writer offer a suggestion, an opinion, a question, or a prediction? Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 74 UNIT 3 • Comparison Essays
ACTIVITY 3 | Understanding the elements of a comparison essay Below is an outline for essay 3.1. Some of the information is missing. Reread the essay and complete the outline. Title: I. Introduction (Paragraph 1) A. Hook: B. Connecting information: Different location, size, language, government, climate, lifestyle C. Thesis statement: II. Body A. Paragraph 2 (Similarity 1) topic sentence: 1. Brazil’s characteristics a. Size: b. Travel: Few Brazilians have traveled extensively in their country. 2. a. Size: covers most of North America, extends from Atlantic to Pacific Oceans, 3.1 million square miles (8 million square kilometers) b. Travel: B. Paragraph 3 (Similarity 2) topic sentence: Another similarity between Brazil and the United States is the diversity of the population. 1. Brazil a. b. Other ethnic groups c. SUPPORT SUPPORT 75 107
SUPPORT 2. United States a. Native Americans b. Northern Europe c. d. Later immigrants from Mediterranean e. f. C. Paragraph 4 (Similarity 3) topic sentence: 1. Brazilians’ belief in freedom: have the right to do and be whatever they want if don’t hurt others, from President Getúlio Vargas in 1930s and 40s 2. U.S. belief in freedom: III. Conclusion (Paragraph 5) A. Restated thesis: B. Opinion: All cultures are more similar than different. SUPPORT WRITER’S NOTE Asking Questions One of the best ways to develop details and facts that will support your main ideas (topic sentences) in each body paragraph is to ask yourself questions about the topic—Where? Why? When? Who? What? How? 76 UNIT 3 • Comparison Essays
Developing a Comparison Essay: Supporting Information ACTIVITY 4 | Writing supporting information Follow these steps. 1. Essay 3.2 includes an introduction, three topic sentences, and a conclusion. Develop each body paragraph with supporting information. You may write on a separate piece of paper. 2. After you finish, compare your supporting information with that of other students. (Note: This essay follows the point-by-point organizational pattern.) WORDS TO KNOW Essay 3.2 consideration: (n) careful and mindful thought eliminate: (v) to remove, destroy intimidate: (v) to persuade by using fear overwhelming: (adj) emotionally or physically overpowering purchase: (n) anything that is bought ESSAY 3.2 Smartphone Choices 1 Some years ago, people were intimidated by shopping for a smartphone. For one, smartphone technology was so new that many people were afraid of it. It was also extremely expensive, and many consumers were not sure if these phones would soon be replaced by yet another new technology. History, of course, has shown that smartphones are here to stay. An ice cave within a glacier in Vatnajokull National Park, Iceland 77 108
Not only that, but they are getting smarter and smarter every year. Today’s smartphone shoppers need to know what their two main options are. Although the technology is no longer new, it can still be intimidating to shop for a smartphone. Consumers can eliminate some of this fear by doing their homework first. One of the biggest considerations for a smartphone purchase is iOS or Android. To reach a decision, a buyer can compare these two operating systems in terms of their overall cost, convenience, and style. 2 iOS and Android devices can differ in their cost. 3 Another thing to consider is the convenience factor, such as the availability of certain apps. 4 Finally, there is the subject of style. 5 Choosing between these two types of smartphones is a personal decision for the consumer. This decision can be made more easily by looking at cost, convenience, and style preferences. While it can seem like an overwhelming task now, it certainly will not get any easier as more and more advanced smartphones come on the market. 78 UNIT 3 • Comparison Essays
Grammar: Connectors for Comparison Essays Connectors help readers by providing logical connections between sentences, ideas, and paragraphs. Some connectors show comparison between sentences or ideas, and others show contrast or concession. Notice the use of commas with these connectors. Connectors That Show Comparison between Sentences COMPARISON EXAMPLES In addition, subject + verb. Both Red Beauty and Midnight Dream roses are known for the size of their blooms, their color, and their fragrance. In addition, they are easy to grow. Similarly, subject + verb. The Midnight Dream rose won awards in local contests last year. Similarly, the Red Beauty rose was singled out for its beauty. Likewise, subject + verb. The blooms of Red Beauty roses last longer than those of most other roses. Likewise, the blooms of the Midnight Dream rose are long lasting. Compared to subject, + verb. Some roses last for a very short time. Compared to these roses, the blooms of Red Beauty and Midnight Dream roses last a long time. Connectors That Show Contrast or Concession between Sentences CONTRAST OR CONCESSION EXAMPLES However, subject + verb. or Nevertheless, subject + verb. Many differences are clear to even beginner gardeners. Nevertheless, some of their differences are not very obvious. On the other hand, subject + verb. Some people find gardening dull. On the other hand, some people like nothing better than to work in their gardens. In contrast, subject + verb. Red Beauty has a strong, sweet fragrance. In contrast, Midnight Dream’s fragrance is light and fruity. Although subject + verb, subject + verb. Both Midnight Dream roses and Red Beauty roses are red. Although both varieties produce red flowers, Midnight Dream roses are much darker than Red Beauty roses. Even though subject + verb, subject + verb. Red Beauty roses and Midnight Dream roses are long-stemmed. Even though both of these species are long stemmed, Red Beauty stems are thinner and covered with thorns. Unlike noun, subject + verb. What do we know about the cost of these two kinds of roses? Unlike Red Beauty, Midnight Dream roses are relatively inexpensive. 79 109
ESSAY 3.3 Parenting 101 1 The film previews are finished, and the movie theater is quiet as everyone waits for the feature film to begin. 1 (However / In contrast), the stillness is suddenly broken by a noise. The audience hears a sniffle1 . The sniffle soon turns to a cry, then a wail. There is an uncomfortable, or perhaps unhappy, toddler sitting in the movie theater. People start shuffling in their seats as they wait for what will happen next. Will the child be taken out of the theater, or will the parent pretend that everything is OK? Scenarios like these happen regularly. The parents’ reaction depends on their parenting style. The two extremes are the lenient (laissez-faire2 ) parent and the strict disciplinarian3 parent. 2 Lenient parents often focus on their child having fun and enjoying being a kid. If a child does something careless like break a glass, lenient parents will not become angry or scream. They know that the child is probably experimenting and meant no harm. Likewise, the parents may even explain to the child that it was an accident and the child should not be upset. 2 (In contrast / Similarly), lenient parents may not be too concerned about following a schedule. They will allow their children to stay up late and experience new things. The motto “You’re only a kid once!” rings very true to these free spirits. These types of parents see themselves as guides for their children, which cannot be said about the second parenting group: the disciplinarians. Every parent has a different style. This father encourages his children to play and joins them in having fun. ACTIVITY 5 | Using connectors Read the essay and choose the appropriate connectors. Refer to the grammar charts if necessary. WORDS TO KNOW Essay 3.3 harm: (n) damage or injury in essence: (phr) basically lenient: (adj) tolerant, compassionate monitor: (v) to observe something attentively pretend: (v) to imagine, act as if something were true scenario: (n) a situation, circumstance when it comes to: (phr) with regards to 80 UNIT 3 • Comparison Essays
3 Disciplinarian parents consider themselves role models for their children. 3 (Unlike / Similarly) lenient parents, their main priorities are the safety and protection of their children. In essence, children are monitored very carefully and may not be allowed to play outside, interact with animals, or roughhouse4 in general. A child who experiences a strict upbringing may be encouraged to focus on his or her studies instead of making friends. 4 (In addition / However), interaction may be limited to only close family members. Children who are raised in highly disciplined environments are typically very focused on their schoolwork. 4 In the end, no parents are truly 100 percent lenient or 100 percent strict when it comes to raising their child. Most fall somewhere in the middle depending on the child, the environment, and the particular situation. 5 (Nevertheless / Similarly), parents clearly lean toward one or the other parenting style. Society knows that both child-rearing styles have advantages and disadvantages, but the more interesting question is this: Which style will these children choose when the time comes for them to become parents? 1 sniffle: a breath taken in through the nose 2 laissez-faire: French for not interfering; “leave it alone” 3disciplinarian: a person who believes in and demands obedience to rules 4 roughhouse: to play in a rough way Grammar: Subject Adjective Clauses An adjective clause (also called a relative clause) is a group of words that describes or identifies the noun or pronoun that comes before it. An adjective clause must have a subject and a verb. In a subject adjective clause, the relative pronoun (that, which, or who) is the subject of the clause. Study the following rules and examples: EXPLANATION EXAMPLE Use that or which for things. adjective clause The textbook that is required for the class is sold out. Use who or that for people. adjective clause The teacher who started the arts program has retired. If the information in the adjective clause is necessary to clarify the person or thing it describes, do not use a comma to separate the ideas. adjective clause The Florida city that is most popular with tourists is Orlando. If the information in the adjective clause is not necessary to understand the sentence, use comma(s) to separate the adjective clause. Commas indicate the information is extra. In nonessential clauses, do not use the pronoun that. adjective clause Orlando, which is located in Florida, is popular with tourists. S S V V S V S V 81 110
Adjective clauses are a way to combine two ideas (simple sentences) into one complex sentence. Study the following examples: SIMPLE SENTENCES COMPLEX SENTENCES WITH ADJECTIVE CLAUSES The shop is always very busy. The shop sells used sports cars. The shop that sells used sports cars is always very busy. Samir studies at a university. The university is well known for its technology programs. Samir studies at a university that is well known for its technology programs. The Khan Academy is a free online tutoring service. It focuses on science and technology education. The Khan Academy, which focuses on science and technology education, is a free online tutoring service. ACTIVITY 6 | Writing adjective clauses Read the following introduction to a comparison essay on vacations. Use the information in parentheses to write adjective clauses. Write the new sentences with adjective clauses on a separate piece of paper. WORDS TO KNOW Essay 3.4 affordable: (adj) inexpensive burden: (n) a worrying responsibility integral: (adj) essential, necessary numerous: (adj) many ESSAY 3.4 The Benefits of Taking Vacation (Vacations are an integral part of life. Vacations can range from a few days to months.)1 .Taking time off from school or work has numerous benefits on the mind, body, and spirit. (Some people might have to spend a lot of money. These people wait too long.) 2 . However, the news is not all bad. There are some affordable vacation options. For instance, some people might prefer to stay home. (A “staycation” is a good alternative. A staycation involves relaxing at home without the burden of school or work.) 3 . Time off regenerates the individual and cannot be undervalued. Regardless of the destination, whether a traditional vacation or a staycation, (time off is necessary for everyone. The time off should be relaxing.) 4 . Vacations, which can range from a few days to months, are an integral part of life 82 UNIT 3 • Comparison Essays
ACTIVITY 7 | Writing more adjective clauses Complete each sentence with an adjective clause. 1. The employee wants a supervisor who . 2. World War II was an unforgettable event in history that . 3. The town government passed a law that . 4. The animals that are in danger of becoming extinct. 5. The Eiffel Tower, which , is located in Paris. BUILDING BETTER VOCABULARY WORDS TO KNOW affordable (adj) asset (n) burden (n) consideration (n) core (n) disruptive (adj) diversity (n) eliminate (v) ethnic (adj) focus on (v) harm (n) in essence (phr) integral (adj) intimidate (v) lenient (adj) massive (adj) monitor (v) numerous (adj) overwhelming (adj) pretend (v) purchase (n) remarkable (adj) scenario (n) unique (adj) when it comes to (phr) AW AW AW AW AW AW AW AW AW AW AW ACTIVITY 8 | Word associations Circle the word or phrase that is more closely related to the bold word or phrase on the left. 1. affordable expensive inexpensive 2. asset useless valuable 3. burden difficult easy 4. eliminate get rid of keep 5. ethnic water food 6. in essence basically uniquely 7. integral important lucky 8. monitor keep watch 9. pretend imagine understand 10. unique many one 83 111
WRITING Developing Ideas for Writing: Brainstorming You may be asked to write comparison essays in your classes. Often, you will be given the two subjects to be compared, such as two poems from a literature course, two political beliefs from a political science course, or an invention and a discovery from a history or science course. When you have to choose your subjects for comparison, the following brainstorming tips will help you. Tips for Brainstorming Topics 1. The two topics should have something in common. For example, eating at home and eating out in a restaurant are both examples of places where people can get a meal. Eating at home and going out to see a movie are both activities, but they do not have enough in common to compare easily. 2. The two topics must also have some differences. For example, the most obvious differences between eating at home and eating in a restaurant are atmosphere, cost, and food variety. Eating eggs at home and eating pasta at home do not have enough differences to make for an interesting comparison. 3. You need to have enough information on each topic to make your comparisons. If you choose two topics that are not well known, it might be more difficult to come up with information. For example, an essay comparing eating at home and eating at your neighbor’s home, which you’ve never visited, would be difficult to support. Making a List A good way to determine whether you have enough information about similarities and differences between two topics is to brainstorm a list. Read the information in the lists. Eating at home Eating in a restaurant atmosphere always the same atmosphere varies depending on restaurant less expensive more expensive: paying for food AND service limited food options—you eat what’s been prepared food can be cooked in different ways eat with family members can choose from a variety of food on the menu food can be cooked in different ways eat with family members Notice that the similarities are circled. These are “links” between the two subjects. A writer could use these links to highlight the similarities between the two options or to lead into a discussion of the differences between them: “Although food can be cooked in different ways whether eating at home or eating in a restaurant, more people prefer. . .” 88 UNIT 3 • Comparison Essays
Making a Venn Diagram Another way to brainstorm similarities and differences is to use a Venn diagram. A Venn diagram is a visual representation of the similarities and differences between two concepts. The middle area, where the two circles overlap, shows the similarities. This Venn diagram compares the characteristics of eating at home and eating in a restaurant. ACTIVITY 15 | Identifying topics for a comparison essay Below are pairs of potential topics for a comparison essay. Write yes under the pairs that would be good and explain briefly what characteristics could be compared. Write no under topics that would not be good choices and change one or both of them into more suitable topics. 1. living in a house/living in an apartment 2. international travel/domestic travel 3. high school/college 4. the weather in Toronto/tourist attractions in Toronto 5. wild animals/animals in a zoo yes—compare costs, privacy, space EATING AT HOME atmosphere always the same less expensive limited food options—you eat what’s been prepared EATING IN A RESTAURANT atmosphere varies depending on restaurant more expensive: paying for food AND service can choose from a variety of food from the menu food can be cooked in different ways eat with family members 89 112
6. computers/computer keyboards 7. hands/feet 8. the surface of the ocean floor/the surface of the continents 9. Earth/the North American continent 10. Chinese food/Mexican food ACTIVITY 16 | Brainstorming: working with a topic Complete the following steps to develop ideas for a comparison essay. 1. Choose one topic from the list or use your own idea for a topic. If you want to use an original idea, talk to your teacher to see if it is appropriate for a comparison essay. two movies two systems of education two machines two professions two famous people two desserts 2. Review the two brainstorming methods from this unit. Fill in the following chart to brainstorm a list of information about each subject. TOPIC: Subject 1: Subject 2: 90 UNIT 3 • Comparison Essays
3. Now fill in the Venn diagram using the same information you wrote in the chart. 4. Decide if you are going to focus on the similarities or the differences between the two subjects or both in your comparison essay. Then choose three or four main points of comparison that you will use and list them here. a. b. c. d. Comparing desserts at a cake shop in Melbourne, Australia 91 113
ACTIVITY 17 | Creating an outline Use the following outline to help you brainstorm a more detailed plan for your comparison essay. For this activity, use the point-by-point method of organization. Remember that the point-by-point method organizes each paragraph by one point of development. Include your ideas from Activity 16. Topic: I. Introduction (Paragraph 1) A. Hook: B. Connecting information: C. Thesis statement: II. Body A. Paragraph 2 (first point of comparison) topic sentence: 1. a. b. 2. a. b. SUPPORT 92 UNIT 3 • Comparison Essays
SUPPORT B. Paragraph 3 (second point of comparison) topic sentence: 1. a. b. 2. a. b. C. Paragraph 4 (third point of comparison) topic sentence: 1. a. b. 2. a. b. III. Conclusion (Paragraph 5) A. Restated thesis: B. Suggestion, prediction, question, or opinion: If you need ideas for phrasing, see Useful Words and Phrases in the Writer’s Handbook. SUPPORT 93 114
164 ReDz ning Composition Skills Composition Skills Transitions for Comparison and Contrast ԓ ere are many transitions that can be used for comparison and contrast. ԓ ey fall into the following four major groups. Study them carefully, and note the necessary punctuation for each type. TRANSITIONS FOR COMPARISON AND CONTRAST Type Examples Phrase 1 Noun For similarity: similar to in comparison to For diʿ erence: in contrast with unlike Similar to New Orleans, Los Angeles attracts many tourists. In comparison to airline travel, you are also allowed to check luggage on a train. In contrast with Dallas, San Francisco has a cold climate. Unlike the Road Runner, the Speed Demon is quite economical. Coordinating Conjunctions For similarity: and For diʿ erence: but yet New York and San Francisco both have good public transportation. San Diego is very dry, but Houston is not. The Speed Demon is cheaper than the Road Runner, yet it has a better air-conditioning system. Subordinating Conjunctions For similarity: just as For diʿ erence: whereas Just as Boston has four seasons, Montreal does too. WhereasAmerican students may study part-time, Lebanese students must study full-time. Expressions Between Sentences For similarity: likewise similarly For diʿ erence: on the other hand in contrast however Rainfall has been higher than normal in New England this spring. Likewise, the west coast has seen more rain than usual. Miami has a big seafood business. Similarly, a great deal of š shing is done around San Francisco. Senator Smith wants to reduce the budget deš cit by raising taxes. On the other hand, Jones advocates making more cuts in spending. Miami has hot, humid summers. In contrast, San Francisco’s summers are cool and windy. 115
Chapter 8: ԓ e Comparison and Contrast Essay 165 ԓ e expression on the contrary is also used when emphasizing contrast, but it is very restricted in its use. It indicates that the two ideas being expressed cannot both be true. For example: JOSÉ: It’s rather hot today. HONG: It is not very hot today. On the contrary, it is quite cool. JOSÉ: The Earth is the š fth planet from the sun. HONG: The Earth is not the š fth planet from the sun. On the contrary, it is the third. Another transition that can sometimes be used in place of on the contrary is in fact. It is not very hot today; in fact, it is quite cool. EXERCISE 9 Complete the sentences with either on the other hand or on the contrary, whichever is appropriate. 1. New Orleans does not have a harsh winter. , it is quite mild. 2. New Orleans does not have a harsh winter. , its summers are terrible. 3. New Orleans does not have a large population. , it is not a village. 4. Many people think that New Orleans is a large city. , it has quite a small population. 5. New Orleans was not originally settled by the Spanish. , its š rst European settlers were French. 6. New Orleans is a big seaport. , its manufacturing industry is quite small. EXERCISE 10 First, read about the writer Jorge Luis Borges. Then turn to the next page and use the information about the writer Yukio Mishima to write sentences comparing and contrasting the two writers. Use the transitions given. The š rst one is done for you. Jorge Luis Borges is one of the greatest modern writers in Spanish. Born in Argentina, he was educated in Europe, and in his early days, he served as a municipal librarian in Buenos Aires. Borges has written a variety of works, including poetry, essays, Dz lm criticism, and short stories. He was at odds with the policies of the Perʴn government in Argentina in the 1940s and 1950s. AϏ er the Perʴn government was overthrown, Borges became a professor of literature at the University of Buenos Aires. Many of his works have been translated into English and other languages. 116
166 ReDz ning Composition Skills 1. Yukio Mishima is considered one of the greatest modern Japanese writers. like Like Borges, Mishima is considered one of the greatest modern writers. also Borges is a great modern writer. Mishima is also considered a great modern writer. similarly Borges is a great modern writer. Similarly, Mishima is considered to be a great modern writer. 2. Mishima was educated in his native country of Japan. unlike but 3. In his early days, Mishima worked for the Finance Ministry. in contrast to whereas 4. Mishima was a proliš c writer, authoring short stories, poems, plays, essays, and novels. similar to likewise 5. Mishima was critical of the Japanese military policies. in the same way similarly Jorge Luis Borges Yukio Mishima 117
Chapter 8: ԓ e Comparison and Contrast Essay 167 6. Mishima performed as an actor. however in contrast 7. Many of Mishima’s works have been translated into English and other languages. like in comparison to Connect to the Internet Companies use their Web sites to communicate with customers and to project a brand image. Find two companies that are in a similar business, such as two banks, two athletic apparel companies, or even two colleges. Compare and contrast the two websites, and make a list of similarities and diԗ erences. ԓ en use the transitions on page 164 to write Dz ve sentences about the websites. EXERCISE 11 In the following essay, transitions have been omitted from the italicized sentences. Edit the essay for coherence by using a variety of transitional devices. 1. When scientists Dz rst examined the human brain, they found it to be divided into two halves, or hemispheres, which are nearly identical in appearance, mirroring each other just as the two sides of the body do. When Roger Sperry examined patients whose connection between the two hemispheres—the corpus callosum—was severed, he found that the two sides of the brain seemed to have diԗ erent functions. Many investigators have studied the diԗ erences between the functions of the two hemispheres and found their relationship to be quite complex. Unfortunately, however, most people have tended to over-generalize. ԓ e leϏ brain is supposed to be logical, rational, and analytical, whereas the right brain is supposed to be creative and emotional. ԓe brain’s hemispheres are not so simplistically split into two neat divisions. In fact, both halves of the brain participate in almost all our mental activity. 2. To begin with, both sides of the brain are in operation when we reason. ԓ e leϏ brain seems to dominate in the kind of reasoning it takes to translate symbols, recognize abstract diԗ erences, and handle algebra and geometry problems. ֜ e leЮ hemisphere may be dominant in these types of reasoning. ֜ e right hemisphere also reasons. ԓ e right half of the brain functions to integrate information and draw conclusions. ֜ e leЮ hemisphere is dominant in recognizing abstract di֠ erences. continued 118
168 ReDz ning Composition Skills ֜ e right hemisphere tends to recognize sameness. For example, the right side is where we mediate facial recognition and recognize shapes. 3. ԓ e two hemispheres act as partners in language and communication. It appears that the leϏ hemisphere is dominant when it comes to understanding grammar and syntax, but when it comes to interpreting emotions in communication, the right brain excels. ֜ e right brain can interpret tone of voice and facial expressions. Whenever we use language, both sides of the brain process the information. 4. ԓ e brain is not totally divided about music. Many people assume that music is mediated solely in the right brain. ֜ at is not so. It is true that the right brain recognizes chords and melodies and seems to mediate pure and slow tones. ֜ e leЮ hemisphere is also involved in music. Fast music, such as bluegrass, requires judgments about sequencing and rhythm, and for this the leϏ hemisphere lends its services. When words are involved, again the leϏ brain dominates. 5. Both halves of the brain are involved in our mental activities. ԓ e corpus callosum and other bridges between the two hemispheres obviously serve to integrate the functions of the two halves, which are in constant communication to make sense out of life. Information from ԓ ompson, Richard. ֜ e Brain: An Introduction to Neuroscience. New York: W. H. Freeman and Co., 1985, and Wortman, Camille B. and LoϏ us, Elizabeth F. Psychology. New York: Alfred H. Knopf, 1985. EXERCISE 12 WRITING Revise the following paragraphs in two ways. First, write an essay by using Pattern B (All of One / All of the Other). Be sure to divide the long paragraphs into shorter paragraphs. Then write an essay by using Pattern A (Point-by-Point). Use appropriate transitions. You may use the following thesis statement for each essay. Thesis Statement: ԓ ere are some interesting parallels between the Roman and Chinese empires, even though these empires ended diԗ erently. ԓ e Roman Empire ruled the Mediterranean world from about 500 ˯.Ԩ. to about 500 ϭ.И. From a geographic base around Rome, it spread out to include North Africa, the Middle East, and Northern Europe. It developed a higher level of civilization than the areas surrounding it. It had a complex governmental structure and a bureaucracy, while the people surrounding it were barbarians and nomads. ԓ ese barbarians were a constant threat to the Roman Empire. ԓ e leaders of the empire devised three ways to protect the empire. First, they conquered territory whose outer boundaries were natural barriers. Examples are the Rhine and Danube Rivers. ԓ ey also built fortiDz cations to keep out invaders. ԓ ey built some fortiDz cations, for example, between the Rhine and Danube and between Scotland and England. ԓ ird, they used precautionary buԗ er states, like colonies, which were midway between barbarism and civilization. ԓ ese all helped to protect the base of the empire, Rome itself. However, toward the end of the continued 119
Chapter 8: ԓ e Comparison and Contrast Essay 169 empire’s rule, some of the buԗ er states revolted. ԓ e Dz nal collapse occurred when the German and Slavic barbarians broke through the fortiDz cations. In a short 200 years, the Roman Empire fell to the power of the Germans. ԓ e Chinese Empire grew and remained intact from 221 ˯.Ԩ. to 1911 ϭ.И. From a geographic base around the Yellow River, it spread northward to Peking, west to the Central Plain, and south to Canton. It developed a higher level of civilization than the areas surrounding it. It became a center for art and philosophy, while the people surrounding it were nomads and barbarians. ԓ ese barbarians, Huns and Mongols, were a constant threat to the empire. ԓ e leaders of the empire devised three ways to deal with them. First, they used natural boundaries like the Yellow and later the Yangtze Rivers. ԓ ey built the incredible Great Wall of China, and they used buԗ er states that learned much from China, becoming civilized in the process. However, at times the barbarians broke through the fortiDz cations and the buԗ er states. ԓ e barbarians did not destroy the Chinese Empire, however. Because the barbarians admired the superior culture of China, they set up dynasties imitating the Chinese way of life. Examples are the Chau, Yuan, and Manchu dynasties. In other words, the Chinese Empire absorbed its intruders and lived on. ԓ e one exception to this was a short rule by the Mongols, lead by Genghis and Kublai Khan from 1215–1279. ԓ e subjugated Chinese dynasty reasserted itself shortly, however. ԓ e Chinese Empire continued to decline slowly until the Manchu dynasty ended in 1911 and a republic was declared. Information from King, C. Harold. A History of Civilization: Earliest Times to the Mid-Seventeenth Century. New York: Scribner’s, 1964. ReDz ning Grammar Skills If you want further review of grammatical structures that will help you achieve coherence and grammatical accuracy in your writing, see Unit 3: Reȓ ning Grammar Skills. ԓ e following sections are designed to coordinate with the comparison and contrast essay. Adverb Clauses of Comparison page 310 Adverb Clauses of Contrast page 310 Adverb Clauses of Concession pages 310–312 Comparative Forms pages 323–327 120
170 ReDz ning Composition Skills EXERCISE 13 EDITING The following paragraph contains errors. Find and correct the errors. The kind and number of errors are indicated. Comparison—5 Subject-verb agreement—4 Verb forms—3 ԓ e diԗ erences between a classical music performance and a rock concert are immediately apparent, even to a Dz rst time attendee. ԓ e expected dress at each kind of concert, for example, couldn’t be diԗ erenter. ԓ e attire at a classical music concert is as formal the clothing at a rock concert is informal. ԓ e behavior of the attendees are also not very similar. At the classical performance, the audience sits quietly and expectantly. ԓ ey do not dancing or talking and may even close their eyes so they can be gooder listeners. At a rock concert, the crowd dances and sways. Shouting, pushing, and jumping is common as well. At a classical music concert, it would be very surprising indeed if an audience member beginned to sing along with the performers. On the contrary, rock musicians sometimes points the microphone toward the crowd to encourage them to sing along with favorite lyrics. However, classical concerts were not always so digniDz ed. In the 18th century, the audience clapped, yelled, and sometimes even throwed food. Even though the manners at these concerts is not very similar, neither audience is less passionater about the music, and their appreciation for the talent and eԗ ort of the musicians is similar to. ԓ ey simply shows it in completely diԗ erent ways. Final Writing Assignment Choose one of the following topics for your š nal writing assignment. 1. In “Conversational Ballgames,” Nancy Masterson Sakamoto shows the contrast between Eastern-style and Western-style conversations. Write about the diʹ erences between conversational styles in your native language and your second language. 2. In “Home Ground, Schoolyard: A Double Life,” Daria Muse contrasts two surprisingly diʹ erent parts of her own life. Write an essay in which you contrast two parts of your life that are surprisingly diʹ erent or in which you compare two parts of your life that are unexpectedly similar. 3. Review the information about the writers Borges and Mishima in Exercise 10. Write an essay comparing and/or contrasting two famous people—two political leaders, two artists, two performers, and so on. Be sure to include a thesis expressing your attitude about the two people. 4. Write an essay comparing or contrasting two diʹ erent attitudes. For example, you might choose your parents’ attitude toward punctuality compared with your own attitude toward punctuality. 121
Chapter 8: ԓ e Comparison and Contrast Essay 171 Follow these steps to complete the assignment: 1. Prewrite to generate ideas. 2. Decide whether you will emphasize comparison or contrast. Then choose related points of comparison or contrast as the basis for your essay. 3. Write a thesis statement with a strong controlling idea to introduce the points of comparison or contrast that you have chosen. Remember that the purpose of the comparison and contrast essay is to persuade, explain, or inform, not just to list diʹ erences or similarities. Ensure that your thesis sentence is persuasive and expresses an attitude. 4. Decide which pattern of organization is more appropriate for your content and then write an outline of the essay. 5. Use the outline to draft the essay. 6. Share your paragraph with a classmate and then complete a peer review. Use the Peer Review Worksheet in Appendix 1 or use the Peer Review Worksheet speciš cally for comparison and contrast essays on the companion website. 7. Revise your paragraph for coherence, taking care to check your use of transitions. Use appropriate grammar structures to achieve coherence. 8. Proofread your paragraph for accuracy. ASSIGNMENTS FROM THE DISCIPLINES Examine these writing assignments typical of those assigned in college classes. With others in your class, discuss how you would approach each assignment. What is the topic? What might the controlling idea be? Would you emphasize comparison or contrast? What kind of transitions might you use? 1. Linguistics: Contrast typical diʹ erences between spoken and written language. 2. Electrical Engineering: Compare and contrast the properties and uses of analog and digital signals. 122
Mechanics and Sentence Structure 123
Thinking through the Research Writing Process Research is a process that occurs throughout the writing process. The following graphic offers suggestions for how to incorporate the research steps you have studied in this chapter into the writing process. Before drafting: - Choose topic, audience, and purpose of research. - Find sources in the library and on the Internet. - Takes notes from sources by paraphrasing, summarizing, and quoting sources. Drafting section: - Synthesize or combine paraphrases, summaries, and quotes with your own views of the topic. - Create a rough draft of your essay and the Works Cited page. Revising section: - Make changes to ensure a smooth flow of ideas among sources. - Insert proper attributions for in-text citations. - Revise for balanced use of your own ideas, paraphrases, summaries, and quotes. 124
Proofreading section: - Correct errors in form or grammar of sentences and paragraphs - Correct errors in form or grammar of in-text citations and the Works Cited page. Reflect on your own research and writing process. On your own paper, in your journal or portfolio, record your prior experiences with research and writing. First, describe the steps you usually take when you research information to include in your writing. Then, describe the steps you usually take when you compose a piece of writing. Finally, discuss how you plan the use of information you learned in this chapter about research and writing. How will your research and writing process change? Master the Basics of MLA Each academic content area has its own style for citing and documenting sources. The most commonly used are the American Psychological Association (APA), Chicago Manual of Style (CMS), and the Modern Language Association (MLA). When you receive a research assignment, ask your teacher to clarify which style you are required to follow. Most students begin their college studies with an English course. Thus, MLA is usually the first style learned and is the focus of this chapter. This section is designed to give you an overview of and practice with the basics of MLA in-text citations in the body of your essay and the Works Cited page, a list of all sources used in your research. In-Text Citations Each paraphrase, summary, or quote of an original source you include writing must be noted in the body of your essay where it appears. This notation is called an “in-text citation” or “parenthetical notation.” The following annotated examples show the basic forms of in-text citations for non-Web and Web sources. Note the use of commas, italics, quotation marks, parentheses, and periods. Non-Web Source Stated in a Sentence: 125
Non-Web Source Stated at the End of Sentence: Web Source Stated in Sentence: Web Source Stated at the End of Sentence: 126
Works Cited Page A Works Cited page is a complete list of all the sources you used in your writing., including paraphrases, summaries, and quotes. The following section offers your an overview of the general guidelines for formatting a Works Cited page and a few basics models of common types of entries. Tips for Formatting Works Cited Page: MLA Style General Format Start the Works Cited page as a separate page at the end of your research paper. Continue using the format of the entire paper: one-inch margins, last name heading, and page numbering. Center the words Works Cited at the top of the page. Do not italicize the words Works Cited or place them in quotation marks. Double space the entire page. Do not skip spaces between entries. Create a hanging indent by indenting by five spaces the second and subsequent lines of each citation. List entries alphabetically by the authors’ last name. Authors’ names are given in the following order: last name first, then middle names or initials, followed by the first name. If there are multiple authors, list only the first author’s name in this order; list the later authors in the standard (first name, middle, and 127
Order of Listing for Entries last) order. Do not include titles such as Dr., Sir, Mr., or Ph.D. Do include identifiers such as Jr. or Il. Example: King, Martin Luther, Jr. When no author is given, begin the entry with and alphabetize by title of article, book, or website. Grammar Rules Use italics for titles of longer works such as books and magazines, and quotation marks for short works such as poems or articles. Capitalize each word on the titles of articles, books, and magazines, except for articles (a, an, the), prepositions (of, for, in) or conjunctions (and, but), unless one appears as the first word in the title. Example: Death of Salesman Sample Student Research Essay The following student essay serves as a model of the use of MLA style for citing and documenting sources in a research essay. The annotations point out and explain the student’s application of MLA style. Steward 1 Adam Steward Professor Henry English 101 10 September 2011 Sleeping Disorders 128
Sleeping disorders cause adults all around the world to suffer by being deprived of the comfort and rest of sleep. One common sleep disorder is sleep apnea. The American Sleep Apnea Association claims that 4% of the population suffers from sleep apnea. Sleep apnea is a “temporary absence of breathing while sleeping” (Wilson 60). During sleep, people with this disorder may stop breathing a couple hundred times and for up to a minute every night. A person suffering from this disorder may not realize he or she is waking up to continue breathing. In most cases, a member of the household detects the problem before the victim does. Understanding the type and treatment of sleep apnea increases the chances of finding relief from the disorder. 1. General format: 1-inch margins. Double spaced. Each page has a header with the writer’s last name and page number. 2. Flush with the left margin, list writer’s name, professor’s name, course number, and date. 3. Centered title without the use of quotation marks, bold font, or italicized font. 4. Note this example of a quotation correctly punctuated and cited in-text. 5. State the main idea of the essay in a thesis statement at the end of the introductory paragraph. Steward 2 There are three types of sleep apnea: obstructive, central, and mixed (Robinson and Frey). Obstructive sleep apnea is caused by a blockage of the air in the throat, mostly for enlarged tonsils. Central sleep apnea is caused by a failure on the part of the brain to control breathing; not physical blockage is the cause. Usually central sleep apnea occurs in people who also struggle with other health problems (“Sleep Apnea”). Mixed sleep apnea is caused by a combination of blockage and lack of a signal from the brain (Robinson and Frey). 129
Obstructive sleep apnea, referred to as OSA, is the most common type. This disorder is very common with people who snore obsessively and men and women over the age of 40 who are obese. Studies by the National Institute of Health (NIH) show that all males who are over 20% or more overweight suffer with OSA. When the apnea occurs, the airway collapses, breathing ceases, and the brain loses oxygen. This loss of oxygen affects the heart, blood pressure, and can lead to damage in the cardiovascular system (Wilson 140). These periods of irregular breathing cause a person to go into a lighter stage of sleep. Because the brain has to awaken to breath, the apnea keeps a person from entering a deep sleep, which leads to a loss of alertness, a possible change in personality, tiredness, and trouble functioning the following day (Wilson 293). There are several conditions associated with sleep apnea such as ulcers, severe headaches, arthritis, and diabetes (Albert 82). Sleep apnea is treated depending on the severity of the disorder. In mild cases, losing weight and sleeping on one's side are recommended. Ingestion of sedatives and 6. Note this example of a summary correctly cited in-text. Steward 3 avoiding alcoholic beverages before bed is also a remedy (“Sleep Apnea”). There are oral mouth devices that keep the airway open and help to reduce snoring. Moderate to severe cases are usually treated with a Continuous Positive Airway Pressure Machine, referred to as C-PAP. The C-PAP is a mask worn while sleeping that blows air into the nose keeping the 130
airway open and unobstructed (Roinson and Frey). In the most severe cases, a person may have to get a tracheotomy, a surgical incision in the throat that allows the sleeper to breathe directly through the windpipe, in order to keep breathing properly. If the apnea is left untreated or undetected, long term effects such as muscle spasms, stroke and heart attack, impotence, and headaches could haunt the person for the rest of their life (Albert 36). Punctuation 131
Punctuation 21 COMMAS RULES Rule 1: Use commas to separate words and word groups with a series of three or more. PD: You may or may not use a comma before “and”; however, be sure to use only one style consistently throughout the whole document. Example: My state is to be split among my sister, daughter, son, and nephew. Rule 2: Use a comma to separate two adjectives when the word and can be inserted between them. Examples: He is a strong, healthy man. We stayed at an expensive summer resort. = You would not say expensive and summer resort, so no comma. Rule 3: Use a comma when a -ly adjective is used with other adjectives. PD: to test when a -ly word is an adjective, see if it can be used alone with a noun. If it can, use the comma. Examples: Felix was a lonely, young boy. I get headaches in brightly lit rooms. = Brightly is not an adjective because it can’t be used alone with rooms; therefore, no comma is used between brightly and lit. Rule 4: Use commas before or surrounding the name or title of a person directly addressed. PD: Capitalize a title when directly addressing someone. Examples: Will you, Aisha, do that assignment for me? Yes, Doctor, I will. 132
Rule 5A: Use a comma to separate the day of the month from the year and after the year. Example: Kathleen met her husband on December 5, 2003, in Mill Valley, California. Rule 5B: If any part of the date is omitted, leave out the comma. Example: They met in December 2003 in Mill Valley. Rule 6: Use a comma to separate the city from the state and after the state in a document. If you use the two-letter capitalized form of a state in a document, you do not need a comma after the state. PD: With addresses on envelopes mailed via the post office, so not use any punctuation. Examples: I lived in San Francisco, California, for 20 years. I lived in San Francisco, CA for 20 years. Rule 7: Use commas to surround degrees or titles used with names. Commas are no longer required around Jr. and Sr. Commas never set off ll, lll and so forth. Example: Al Mooney, M.D., knew Sam Sunny Jr. and Charles Starr lll. Rule 8: Use commas to set off expressions that interrupt sentence flow. Example: I am, as you have probably noticed, very nervous about this. Rule 9: When starting a sentence with a weak clause, use a comma after it. Conversely, do not use a comma when the sentence starts with a strong clause followed by a weak clause. 133
Examples: If you are not sure about this, let me know now. Let me know now if you are not sure about this. Rule 10: Use a comma after phrases of more than three words that begin a sentence. If the phrase has fewer than three words, the comma is optional. Examples: To apply for this job, you must have previous experience. On February 14(,) many couples give each other candy or flowers. Rule 11: If something or someone is sufficiently identified, the description following it is considered nonessential and should be surrounded by commas. Examples: Freddy, who has a limp, was in an auto accident. = Freddy is named so the description is nonessential. The boy who has a limp was in an auto accident. = We don’t know which boy it is being referred to without further description; therefore, no commas are used. Rule 12: Use a comma to separate two strong clauses joined by a coordinating conjunction -and, or, but, for, nor. You can omit the comma if the clauses are both short. Examples: I have painted the entire house, but he is still working on sanding the doors. I paint and he writes. Rule 13: Use the comma to separate two sentences if it will help to avoid the comma. Example: I chose red and green, and blue was his first choice Rule 14: A comma splice is an error caused by joining two strong clauses with only a comma instead of separating the clauses with a conjunction, a semicolon, or a period. A run-on sentence, which is incorrect, is created by joining two strong clauses without punctuation. 134
Incorrect examples: Time flies when we are having fun, we are always having fun (Comma splice). Time flies when we are having fun we are always having fun (Run-on). Correct examples: Time flies when we are having fun; we are always having fun. Time flies when we are having fun, and we are always having fun (Comma is optional because both strong clauses are short). Time flies when we are having fun. We are always having fun. Rule 15: If the subject does not appear in front of the second verb, do not use a comma. Example: He thought quickly but still did not answer correctly. Rule 16: Use commas to introduce or interrupt direct quotations shorter than three lines. Examples: He actually said, “I do not care.” “Why,” I asked, “do you always forget to do it?” Rule 17: Use a comma to separate a statement from a question. Example: I can go, can’t I? Rule 18: Use a comma to separate contrasting parts of a sentence. Example: This is my money, not yours. Rule 19: Use a comma when beginning a sentence with introductory words such as well, now, or yes. 135