Oblivion

Notice that the universal version, or the torus image, has a
light and dark section.

We discussed how only 4% of the known universe is made
of atomic matter, and how atoms are 99.99% empty space.

In order to merge more fully into the Unified Field, if we
choose to call it that, we have to embody the darkness as

well.

Universal Composition

“Matter Distribution” by Brews ohare is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0,
https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=5317762

Journal 4

Reflect upon your relationship to the trinity of
holding- empty handedness-being held.



5. Darkness & Death

(Alchemical Fermentation)

Trinity: Light, Darkness, Lighting Darkness
Life, Death, Immortality

Mercury Symbol

Entering the field of fermentation, we are ruled by Mercury.
This will provide the binding amalgam to continue to marry

the dual elements that were united in conjunction into 1
being.

Conjunction merged the light and the darkness, and these
forces will continue to dance together until we forge the

inner philosopher’s stone.
In the process of fermentation, we have a rotting and
ripening. We die in the darkness of night in order to bring

forth the light of spirit. We begin the process of
alchemically digesting or metabolizing ourselves into living

light, fueled by our refuse.
As we merge the dark and the light, we become more
accustomed to seeing in the darkness and finding the way

seemingly blind folded. Again, being asked to turn inward,
the eyes which peer into the outer world are traded for the

inner vision or the inner eye.

To aid in this process, we may find that the external
distractions of the world fade away as we are being asked

to look ever deeper inward.

We are looking for the one small light, which will endure
when all other lights have been extinguished. For this
reason, we may lose some of the other lights that have

brightened our lives so far. For they compete with the one
true light within and may make it impossible to see.

It is easy to take this personally or feel that we are moving
backwards, while in truth we are grooming our darkness to
create the delicate and silent backdrop that will be used to

announce the rebirth of our inner flame.

In the light of day, this light cannot come to be know, and so
for this reason, the dark can be used to know the light.

There have been times for me when the inner light was
extremely wild and vivid and others when all the lights went

out.

I feel that when the lights go out, we are being asked to dig
deeper. We are looking for the light that endures all.

Fermentation also has a fire element, and can be a very
vibrant and creative time. I believe it was while fermenting

that I started to create artwork, and felt the images burned
in my mind.

Like making wine from decomposing grapes, we are
creating the spirits within from the refuse that we have
encountered and collected along our journey. Like a

peacock, we transform the poison into potion.

Fermentation encompasses both the rotting of the grapes
and the transformational crushing that they must undergo

to become spirit.

The Spiritual Life of Mercury

As we enter fermentation, we are entering the field of
Mercury, the trickster. He is the messenger between worlds,
and so we too must weave together the worlds of dark and

light, death and life, in order to be crowned as royal.
If we compare the images below we can see the similarities
within the forms of The Staff of Hermes, a.k.a. the Caduceus,

and the electromagnetic wave.
Electricity is male/light and magnetism is female/dark. On

the staff, this is reflected by the light and dark snake.
Because Hermes and humans are both, we are able to
transcend that duality and “wind the serpents” into one.

This is similar, I imagine, to what happens when the
Kundalini rises into transcendence.

“Onde electromagnetique” by SuperManu is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0,
https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=2107870

Within fermentation, we rot and ripen in order to make the
inner spirit of wine. So, we are dying in order to make the
spirit within. In this act, we braid the light and the darkness
and move toward reclaiming our spiritual wings. To earn
our wings, we must first know ourselves, light in/and dark.

Mercury is neither solid nor liquid at room temperature,
and so unifies duality. It also has a mirror like quality.

By А - Own work, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=473620

A mirror, like mercury, is both male and female. It reflects
like the feminine moon, the male sun light and so partakes

in both.

This mirroring quality of mercury might help to explain why
a recent discovery of a large amount of liquid mercury was

discovered within a tunnel beneath the Temple of
Quetzalcoatl at the pyramid complex of Teotihuacan,

Mexico.

It has been suggested that this tunnel signified a gateway
into the underworld. The mercury may have symbolized a
mirror by which to gaze into the underworld, as mirrors
were considered a way to look into the supernatural world.
They were a way to divine what might happen in the future.

The Aztecs made mirrors of obsidian, used for divinatory
and shamanistic purposes. These mirrors are connected to

an Aztec deity called Smoking Mirror.

This god was connected to sorcery and divination, and was

a rival to the light of Quetzalcoatl. For our purposes, we
might think of Smoking Mirror, as the ghosts or smoke that
dance over our heart’s mirror and keep us from seeing our

true reflection.

In order to wipe the smoke or ghosts off the mirror of the
heart we have to communicate with our underworld, in

more ominous conditions than we find in the upper-world.

We have to use the ever small inner light in order to gaze
into the inner mirror and learn the difference between the

ghosts of our underworld and the clear light of our
heavenly upper- world.

The Mausoleum of the first Qin emperor in China was also
discovered to have a room in which was found flowing

rivers of mercury. This emperor was very much concerned
with alchemy and immortality, and this may explain the
meaning behind the rivers of this alchemical substance.

The room of mercury remains cloaked in mystery. It
strikes me as curious that tombs of the dead or tunnels into
the underworld, though connected to the eternal realm are
covered with so much matter. Why is that? What power does

burial really hold?

Like the underground invisible tunnels hidden under huge
(a)mounts of matter seen as pyramids, through alchemical
fermentation we too become a tunnel or channel between

the land of the living and the land of the dead.

As we become more purified we are able to peer more
directly into power both within and without. The more we
clean our inner mirror of the heart the more we are able to
receive the power of pure light to become permanently

enlightened.

As we become more familiar with our inner underworld, we
must learn to wipe the ghosts off its mysterious surface so

that through reflection, we can truly see ourselves.

When viewing ourselves through the use of the inner mirror
or mercury, we will come to know ourselves in a different,
non-dual way. We will begin to know ourselves as a little
beacon of divine light housed within the darkness of matter.

Journal 5

Reflect upon your relationship with the trinity of
Light-Dark-Lighting Darkness /Enlightenment
or Life-Death-Immortality.



6. Nowhere

(Alchemical Distillation)

Trinity: Somewhere, Nowhere, Everywhere

Silver Symbol

The process of distillation was ruled by the metal silver and
by the Moon. Now, that our dual worlds are more truly

bonded together, we will circulate them between heaven and
earth to further purify what we have made.

As this process will circulate us down from the depths and
up into the starry heavens over and over again, our poles
will continue to be both merged and purified into a celestial

dew or vapor.

This circulation between the above and the below, and the
rarefied nature of the substance that is formed, may leave
us with the feeling of being both nothing and nowhere as
there is no ground or center, just circulation over and over.

For this reason, we may again feel we lose direction in life.
But, as we are learning, the spiritual path only takes the

matter that it will use to harness its energetic equivalent. We
may experience this directionless loss as feeling like we are

going nowhere, on an endless road to nowhere.

This is because we are entering into the field where we will
be all things and everywhere. So we have to transcend
being “somewhere”.

We cannot define this oblivious location with typical space
time coordinates, so they are being blurred and erased, in

order to transcend the limitations of space time.

If we are intent on going “somewhere” and being
“something” we are resisting the spiritual evolution out of

those dual world parameters.

Again, this can be disconcerting. As we surrender the
things we find in space and the places we find within time,

the result is that we receive or earn their energetic
equivalent.

We learn to become space time and by becoming it we forge
the way to transcend it, sort of like a wormhole transcends

space time by being made of space time.

In my own life, it felt like my whole life fell apart when after
completing acupuncture school, my dream of starting a
practice seemed to dissolve like sand in my hands.

I took it personally and felt like such a failure as I watched
all my friends move forward in their dreams, getting

married, starting or joining practices, my life seemed to
grind to a screeching halt.

I felt like such a failure that I would refuse to be made
visible in places where people knew me, because I did not

know how to describe the oblivion that my life seemed to
become.

I felt trapped in a life that I did not want, and in a job that I
hated. To me, this was a process of distillation. All direction

was lost.

Ancient imagery for this process often involved
bloodletting and sacrifice, as the embryo within requires all
we have to give, just like supporting a human embryo. We

are sacrificing our blood for the life of our spiritual
embryo.

It felt as if my heart was being unplugged and completely
drained, and all my dreams were lost as well.

Entrenched in what I wanted, would prevent me from moving
into something bigger. It seems I was being asked to

surrender my desire to be a certain “someone” with a life
going “somewhere”.

Embracing this “going nowhere” initiates one into
becoming the 1 point that is the moment, transcending time,
encompassing all time, and by seemingly going nowhere,

that point is able to potentially travel everywhere.

By going nowhere, one is led to realize that in this stillness
all places are here.

Distillation, the circulation from the above to the below
unifies all that is, and that is what we are learning and

losing to become.

The Spiritual Life of Silver

Through fermentation, we were prepared for distillation. We
peered through the darkness of the smoking mirror as we
entered the underworld. Mercury was once used to make
mirrors, but for reasons of toxicity this is no longer the
case.
Silver is in fact the best reflector of visible light known. In
fermentation we gazed with a more invisible inner light, to
peer into the realm of shadows.
As we move into distillation we integrate peering into the

light as well, but this light play bleeds out of the underworld
and into our waking life as experienced as either a dream or

nightmare, and so we enter into the looking glass.

“Diagram of Specular Reflection” by Johan Arvelius is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0
https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=339902

The dynamic of distillation is the circulation of light
vertically between the upper and lower worlds within.
In the alchemist’s lab, this was accomplished by heating the
material in a still. This would then rise as heated vapor and
fall again, just like the water cycle, thus integrating the

above/heaven with the below/earth.

We can also imagine this as a light cone, in which we are
learning to embody both cones simultaneously, since we
are merging our duality, we are finding that all time resides

in the present moment.

“World Line” by K Aainsqatsi is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0
https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=2210907

If we consider this image, which depicts the path of light
reflected from a mirror and bounces toward the observer,
we can understand a possible psychological experience of

inner distillation.
It could be summarized in the psychology of projection. As
we learn to conduct the universal force within us, we have
had to surrender much of our suchness. Part of why this is
necessary is because we cannot tune into 2 radio stations
at once, the ego-verse and the universe. Obviously, the ego

is the one to clean out, until it is no longer running
interference.

Our experience of reality is like a broadcast between our
microcosmic heart field and the macrocosmic Unified Field.

We project our reality through the heart/mind as energy,
and it bounces off of the mirror of reality and we experience

it as the observer of the observed.

This is great if we can figure out that we are projecting our
experience. Our reality is like the feedback mechanism that
allows us to discover if we are aligned with our heart’s truth
or not. If our life is like a magical dream we are closer to
point, if more like a waking nightmare, than we are running
significant interference and the heart is not able to clearly

receive the light to transmit the light.

Maybe there is pain or fear that causes the heart to
contract, thus reducing the amplification of the heart field.

One may feel more inclined to contract the heart as the
world seems so painful, when the painful world could be

seen as a result of a contracted heart.

Undergoing distillation helps us to work on what we are
projecting into the world in order to purify it so that we

don’t continue to be creating & living the nightmare.

The more we surrender the interference connected to our
personal suffering, the more we allow our hearts to open,
and thus broadcast the fabulous flavor of light that will hit

the mirror and reflect back to us, quenching our soul’s
thirst.

Throughout distillation, we will continue this back and
forth of consciousness until the fields are in sync. We move

from being somewhere, to nowhere, to everywhere as the
fields reunite. We learn that the future is here now, trying to

hold hands with us in order to be made real.

When we have light going out and light coming back in, then
we are learning to see with the light of true being, minus the

interference of the filters of suffering, personal brain
chatter, and resistance.

Journal 6

Reflect upon your relationship to the trinity of
somewhere-nowhere-everywhere.



7. Empty/Broken Hearted

(Alchemical Coagulation)

Trinity: Wanting, Empty Heartedness, Being

Gold Symbol

Passing through the ephemeral process of distillation, we
are now required to bring ourselves back to earth and

congeal into a point, the vapor that we collected through
the prior process of distillation.

This is the prize of highest purity, and was associated with
the metal of gold. Once coagulation was achieved it was

told that we had consecrated the stone, the inner immortal
light being which was now secured as eternal, and had the

power to transform all that it came into contact with.
The old blood of the heart has been successfully drained.
The plug was pulled and the flat line announced that life

had departed.
But, the inner spark was mysteriously in the darkness
discovered, which brings back the life of the departed soul.
It calls us down from heaven back down to earth in order to

bring heaven to earth and fulfill our true destiny.

We have discovered upon the path of spirit that all that we
“lose” in material form, we receive in spiritual form. Matter
dies, but energy endures, and we have been on the path of

seeking our eternal energy within as light.

On the path of spirit, we sacrifice the positive, become the
negative, in order to transcend them both. We surrender
being “something” and realize we are “nothing” in order to
become “everything”. We can summarize, and look at it this

way.

Alchemy Positive/Matter Negative/Energy Nondual/Spirit

Calcination Something Nothing Everything
Dissolution Speaking
Silence Listening
Separation Thinking
Inner Voice
Conjunction Holding
Fermentation Light Empty Headed Knowing
Life Losing the Mind
Distillation
Coagulation Somewhere Empty Handed Being Held
Wanting
Darkness Lighting Darkness

Death Immortal

Nowhere Everywhere

Empty Hearted Being

Broken Hearted
Flat Lined

Dead

It is easy to see why in our materialistic world, we only
believe what we see because we idolize matter, and have

grown blind to the trinity that it completes.

In order to be redefined as spiritual beings, first and
foremost, we need to let go of the defined world of matter.
Its laws are not made for spirit. Once we let go of the world
of matter, we indeed feel like we don’t matter, because we

have entered oblivion, the boundary between light and
darkness and all that is dual. We won’t matter, because we

are no longer defined by matter. We will roll into its
opposite, antimatter if you will, and we will identify more
with the opposite, and we will understand how we too are
“nothing”. When the something of matter and the nothing of
antimatter coexist and join they annihilate and explode into

pure energy, and so do we.

In this way, we enter oblivion in order to receive
transcendence. We embody the duality and then we use it to
create the trinity, a higher dimension that sees through the

limitations of what came before it.

We are all struggling in this dual world. And, this struggle
is the work that we must do in order to learn about duality

so that we may transcend it.

It can be said that for all we lose in material form, it is a
needed sacrifice in order to receive that gift in

energetic/spiritual form. For the eternal truth lies not in
matter, but within the invisible energy that is trapped within

it.

All we have lost, is allowed to transform, for it has the seed
within to become the invisible wind beneath our wings, the

“nothing” that in a dual world, may seem “negative” but that
is the invisible that allows the visible to exist.

When we remove the material masks off of what we have
lost, we allow the energy to unfold. It speaks of the

“negative” that it is bringing to us, so that we may transcend
it, and be what we were wishing someone or something else
would be for us. We must reclaim that power to be what we
seek. When we are that, we give it to ourselves and share it

with the world. This is our gift.

Life is a risk, a gamble, we all want matter to endure, but
physics says it can’t. We want our happy ever after, but
alchemically speaking, much work between the light and
dark and their union must be done before that can be won.

Our culture is ashamed of the dark, and so we think we
should be too, and so we fixate on trying to make matter

endure, which it cannot. We curse ourselves for our
failures, shortcomings and heartbreaks unknowing that

these life events were the matter, meant to deliver the
energy that we could use, when we were ready, to take
ourselves into the next level, transcend, and claim our

wings.

Matter is the magnetic lure which life uses to catch us on
the divine golden hook. We watch it sparkle in the water and
dream of how that gold will taste. But once we bite, reality
sets in and that material lure was just a way for the divine to

bring us near and whisper to us about the matter and the
light and what lasts and what doesn’t, so that we can know

ourselves. We cannot even physically taste that golden
hook, because it is not of this world and yet we have eyes to

witness its sparkle, and we know it has truth. In order to
truly “taste” the gold, we must first become it.

We are in a binary world of “is” and “is not”, while the
divine world could be said to exist in a state of “being”.
Perhaps, the taste of that gold hook is the taste of the

experience that it brings to us. An experience can be
contrived from matter, but is not matter. An experience is
the energetic component of an interaction with matter. That
taste which we experience for better or worse, is the vital
catalyst that has taken hold within ourselves because we

cannot yet eat the gold hook.

Matter transfers energetic experiences to us, formed
through our projections, which we digest and bring deep

within. This digestion allows the energy to work the
transformation which will lead to our evolution from matter

to energy to spirit.

Taste the dagger that is still hanging and bleeding in your
heart. Call it your faithful companion and a welcome guest.

It has cleaved as matter to create an experience so bitter
and vile that you vowed “never again”, a clever negative, to
balance the positive, which will reign in the spirit that rules

as love forever.

In this way, our personal crucifixions are the arrows of
matter that carry the charge that is able to transform the

heart into tried and true angel’s wings which soar as love
into eternity.

The Spiritual Life of Gold

What is unique about gold is that it is non-corrosive and
non-corruptible (immortal). It is pure. Once you have forged

the gold, it will stand the test of time. Another property of
gold is that it is an excellent conductor of electricity.

When we move into alchemical coagulation, we are standing
within the inner completion of the philosopher’s stone.

After much clearing, we are prepared to drink the golden
nectar which has been released within, and is able to
transform our entire being.

The Ark of the Covenant can be used as a symbol for the
process of coagulation. Of course, it is golden, and gold is

the metal of this process, ruled by the heavenly sun.
Another way that this ancient biblical artifact reflects the
perfected stone is that it combines the heavenly with the
earthly realms. The last part of alchemy demands that we

return from heaven to earth.

The heavenly angels on the top of the ark are gold and
serve as the electrical conductors, while the wooden, empty
four cornered box below represents the insulator/ground of

the earth.

When we harness the earth to heaven we create a divine
circuit and allow the gold conductor to transmit electricity.
This combination of conductor and insulator makes the Ark

a capacitor. It is able to store electrical power.

Perhaps this is part of the reason that this amazing artifact
was also said to be a weapon, and killed many, even those

who served it.

This divine power is incredible. The divine within us is
incredible as well, and just like the poisonous elements that

were used in alchemy, the seeker must be prepared to be
able to receive, transform, and eventually carry this

incredible energy. On earth, it must be grounded so that we
are not burned alive.

I connect coagulation with empty heartedness. The true flat
line that allows for the resurrection. Like the empty box

which serves as the ground of divine power, the heart must
be emptied, in order to be refilled & recharged, with
celestial light, the regal blood.

For one not prepared, a voided heart could be connected to
death or mental imbalance, but through the path of spirit,
the stones in the heart are ground down slowly through
time.

In comparing the empty heart to the empty wooden chest,
this voided or broken heart is being cracked open in order

that it may again conduct divine charge and receive the
magical gifts of spirit.

The Ark was said to be a vessel for 3 magical items; the
manna, the 10 commandments, and the Rod of Aaron.
This could be interpreted to reflect that in voiding the heart,
the divinely penetrated heart is offered 3 magical gifts.
The manna is our inner physical and spiritual nourishment,
the laws represent reunion with universal or divine law, and
the Rod of Aaron grants our golden heart the ability to
touch others so that they too can become the gold living

light.

The Budding of Aaron’s Rod

This means that we are now inwardly fed by heaven, we
follow the law and are no longer confused by the darkness,

and we are able to perform the act of “multiplying” the gold
through the presence of the gold.

Joined with the divine, we reside in and through the Ark,
physically and spiritually. The divine is above, we are the
below. Reunited with the divine, we bring heaven to earth.

Alchemy required that we purify our essence and sacrifice
all that was unreal within ourselves. This prepared our

vessel to conduct the true light, and as our toxins have been
released, this light will not incinerate us.

In essence, we are golden. We have been broken down to
such a degree that our personal obstructions have melted

away through the forces of transmutation.

We are in sync, conducting the universal life force through
ourselves again, so that together we form 1 unified field of

being.

Our hunger is healed, as we have an eternal internal food
source in the manna. Our confusion is cleared, as we have a

direct inner connection to universal law. Our division has
departed, as we are reunited with our inner divinity by

which we experience ourselves as made in the image of the
divine, able to confer the golden light of life.

Our gold is a presence that will, like Aaron’s Rod,
transform all that it touches, so that it too becomes the gold

light. We are tools of enlightenment.

The gold makes this transmutation an eternal one. It cannot
be tarnished or defiled. For this reason, we are “immortal”.

With golden consciousness, we are awake. This
consciousness bridges the light into the darkness, the living
into the dead, and so when our material body expires, our

golden consciousness will endure, and continue on, as
everlasting light outside of the cycle of repeated
reincarnation born of attachment and ignorance.

As our light and dark are united, we will have abilities that
may seem miraculous. This is what happens when duality is
transcended. When we are living on earth as the ground of

heaven, heaven is one with us, and so the physics of that
realm interact and transcend our own.

We are all that in duality we sought, and transcend the
limitations of the matrix of space time as we move into
simple universal being. As it inhales, we inhale. As it
exhales, we exhale. We are one, and in this oneness we are

free.

Statue of Freedom, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=1270736