2022-05-01 Reader's Digest

MAY 2022 PTWOQakWOueiRzEODRur

WOOF!
MEOW!

Decoding
Pet Speak

An RD ORIGINAL

How Your 51
Cells Can
Heal You SPRING
CLEANING
By PATRICIA PEARSON
Shortcuts
From RD.COM

A Baseball Player’s
Second Chance

From ESPN

Escape from Kabul

A DRAMA IN REAL LIFE

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A Trusted Friend in a Complicated World

TMB STudio; prop STyliST: EMiko FranzEn (covEr). k. Synold (SpongE houSE) Features unseen neighbor 86
transforms in isolation.
46 drama in reaL Life
By adrian van young
Cover Story FroM guernica Don’t Leave
Without Me!*
GOOD NEIGHBORS* 68
Staying in Kabul meant
A delectable collection inSpiration death for this journal-
of stories about com- ist. A naval officer and
munity and kindness. A Major Leaguer’s a reporter were ready
Second Chance to help her flee—if she
48 The Sunshine at Life* could make the plane.
Mayor
A suicide attempt By FaTEMa hoSSEini wiTh
By caThy FrEE FroM nearly ended Drew kiM hjElMgaard and
ThE washington post Robinson’s story. kEllEy BEnhaM FrEnch
Now he is adding FroM usa today
50 Out on a Limb the most remarkable
chapters yet. 96
By dana hEdgpETh
FroM ThE washington By jEFF paSSan FroM espn HoW to

post 78 Clean the Things You
Never Do, But Should*
52 Nothing but Net HeaLtH
Add an item or two to
By david waldSTEin How Our Own your routine, and your
FroM ThE new york Cells Can Heal Us* home will thank you.

times Breakthrough treat- By EMily goodMan
ments in what’s called and jaMiE novak
54 Up from the Well regenerative medicine
can be a lifesaver.
By roBErT kiEnEr
By paTricia pEarSon
57 Friends, Indeed
96
By rEadEr’S digEST
rEadErS

62

Life WeLL Lived

The Hole in
the Fence

A child’s unlikely
friendship with an

cover Photo by K. Synold 1

Reader’s Digest Contents

Departments Humor

4 Dear Reader Life in These United States ������������������������������������� 18
6 Letters Humor in Uniform ���������������������������������������������������� 24
All in a Day’s Work ���������������������������������������������������� 32
World of good Laughter, the Best Medicine ���������������������������������� 42

9 The Fur Flies BEst PEt Pals QuotaBlE QuotEs

EvEryday HEroEs 16 Porkchop aka 109 Tim McGraw,
Ernestine Kevin Garnett,
10 Ghost Boat Amanda Gorman
WE found a fix
by Derek burnett TrusTed Friend
21 Put Your Plastic
13 Life Cycles Cups to Work, 116 Neighbors
and More by Tomi Um
by AnDy simmons
food for tHougHt The Healthy
EvEryday miraclEs
26 Beyond 35 Skin Care for
14 Breaking Ground Sauerkraut Warmer Weather

by ryAn hockensmith 13 tHings by Jenn sinrich
from espn
28 What Your 39 E-Bike Safety Tips
28 Pet Is Trying
to Tell You* by beth Weinhouse

by emily gooDmAn 40 News from the
World of Medicine
WHErE, oH WHErE?
Brain Games
44 Rolling
Green Hills 111 Spymaster,
Fact or Fiction?
tHE rd list and More

105 The Offer, Brad 113 Word Power*
Meltzer, Benjamin
Franklin, and More

Send letters to [email protected] or Letters, Reader’s Digest, PO Box 6100, Harlan, Iowa 51593-1600. Include your full name, address, serge bloch
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2 may 2022 | Rd.com * Story referenced on cover

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Reader’s Digest

DEAR READER

Helping
Hands

I have moved more than any ratio- Help us find the nicest place in America. from top: Callie lipkin. tmB Studio/mark derSe
nal person should during a lifetime.
But wherever I’ve lived, I’ve always lifelong friend. For a wonderful story
found the same thing—good people. on this, be sure to read “The Hole in
the Fence” (page 62), about a child’s
Despite what we hear about the friendship with an unseen neighbor.
mood across the country, I’ve found
that people still look out for each Now I want to hear more about your
other in neighborhoods everywhere. neighborhood. Every town has a place
You can count on someone to help that lifts people up. Maybe it’s a local
shovel snow, carry groceries, or haul diner or bookstore that creates com-
a stroller up the stairs. Every commu- mon ground for people of different
nity I’ve lived in has the block party backgrounds. Maybe it’s a community
organizer, the volunteer coach, some- center that helps folks during tough
one who sets up a Little Free Library, times, such as a pandemic, a natural
and that one person who gives out disaster, or just a streak of bad luck.
full-size candy bars on Halloween. We have launched our search for the
(How do my kids always find you?) Nicest Places in America 2022 and
want to hear about a place you’ve
We’re here to celebrate those
people. In “Good Neighbors” found that makes life better for the
(page 46) we look at special people around you.
people bringing communities
together through thoughtful Let’s share our stories and re-
acts, friendly words, and, in mind each other that you can find
one case, a lifesaving res-
cue. We also share your kindness close to home.
stories about someone Often right next door. RD
stepping in with a help-
ing hand and turning Jason Buhrmester,
from a neighbor to a chief content officer

Visit rd.com/nicest

and tell us your story.

4 may 2022 | Rd.com



LETTERS it so often that it made
a deep impression
Notes on on our four-year-old
Past Issues daughter’s under-
standing of the word
Little Magazine, Big Stories “roots.” While tugging
on some stubborn
“I’ve Come to Clean Your Shoes” from your weeds, she exclaimed,
collection of top stories from the Reader’s “Boy, these sure have
Digest archives (February) reminded me a lot of ancestors!”
of my brother-in-law’s passing. We were —Janet Key
flooded with teary-eyed visitors bearing Annandale, Minnesota
casseroles and desserts—and soon there
wasn’t a paper towel, tissue, or paper plate 13 Things
left in the house. Since then, when I visit
the bereaved, I bring paper products. I found your story on
They’re always appreciated. cryptocurrency (Febru-
ary) interesting since
—Rita Larkin Kayser it’s such a hot topic;
Marquand, Missouri however, the author
states that Samsung is
“Reader’s Digest Reader’s Digest!” And a Japanese company tmb studio
Saved My Life!” she was correct. when it’s actually South
—Denise Thiery Korean. As a Samsung
Add my mom to your list Alexandria, Kentucky employee of over
of readers who’ve found 20 years, I feel obli-
medical help in RD’s What Roots gated to clarify.
pages (February). She Means to Me —Jana-Lynn Kam
once answered “What Sunnyvale, California
seems to be the prob- Henry Louis Gates Jr.
lem?” with her symp- writing about Roots Growing Hope
toms, likely diagnosis, author Alex Haley
and treatment. The doc- (February) reminded Jane Goodall’s story
tor laughed and asked me of watching the TV “Growing Hope”
how she was so sure. She miniseries with my (March/April) about
said, “I read about it in family. We discussed the promising resil-
ience of nature cer-
tainly did its job.
Sometimes hope comes
from nature surviving
at the physical edge of

6 may 2022

Reader’s Digest

extinction. Bristlecone picking up. Aware that AIRING OUT OUR
pines survive at the she probably wasn’t DIRTY LAUNDRY
highest mountain ele- getting many tips, we
vations of the American tipped $40. Choking up, ✦✦ “New Rules of Laun­
West. They are short, she explained it was all dry” (December/January)
scraggly, and gnarled, she needed to pay her says to wash clothes
and appear barely alive. electric bill. in warm water. In the
Yet, there is one in Cali- —Cynthia Hazard desert, “cold” water is
fornia’s Inyo National Panama City, Florida warmer than “warm” half
Forest that’s nearly of the year. Newcomers
5,000 years old. You Warning: This Fruit often ask if something is
can’t help walking May Orbisculate broken. In cool weather,
through a grove of bris- I’ll use “warm.” Other­
tlecone pines without After reading the story wise, I stick with “cold”!
having hope for nature. about the made-up
—Thomas Straka word “orbisculate” —Joan Balaris
Pendleton, (December/January),
South Carolina residents of our senior Palm Desert, California
community chose it for
How To Know How our word-in-a-word ✦✦ The Laundry Guy
Much to Tip? game. In one hour we must have a desk job if
found 223 words with his weekly wash can be
You are right to cham- four or more letters done in a day on express.
pion good tipping within “orbisculate.” On our farm, the washer
(March/April). During Any challengers want runs every day, on the ex­
the pandemic, our fa- to take us on? tra dirt cycle—if you want
vorite server brought —Sue Mollineaux the cow dirt out, that is!
out a pizza we were Torrington, Connecticut
—Colette Zeigler-Staley

reynolDs, inDiana

shishir_bansal/getty images CEANLTLRFIOESR! What’s Your Favorite Word?

Logophiles, make some noise! Is there a word (whether in
the dictionary or not) that you think is supercalifragilistic­
expialidocious? A bon mot so mellifluous that you can’t help but
sprinkle it in like conversational parsley? A quirky regionalism
or neologism that so perfectly describes something that you
must enlighten the rest of the world? A definition that leaves
you bumfuzzled? See terms and submit your word at rd.com/
favoriteword and it might appear in Reader’s Digest.

Rd.com 7

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Reader’s Digest

World of

GOOD

Reasons to Smile

courtesy HersHey Bears and Justsports pHotograpHy The Fur Flies

H ockey isn’t usually associated with the warm fuzzies. But on
January 22, after the American Hockey League’s Hershey Bears
scored their first goal of the night, fans celebrated by throwing
stuffed animals onto the ice. Not tens, not hundreds, but 52,341 toys. The
Bears have hosted an annual Teddy Bear Toss since 2001, donating the toys
to local children’s charities. It took crews more than 30 minutes to clear the
ice, a result of what a Bears announcer called “sweet, cuddly mayhem.” RD

Rd.com | may 2022 9

Reader’s Digest

EVERYDAY HEROES

Ghost Boat

There was no one aboard the pleasure craft
that almost T-boned them. So father and son

went fishing for answers.

By Derek Burnett

I t was 11:30 a.m., and the fishing so stared incredulously. Four fishing courtesy Andrew shermAn
far had been a bust. Still, floating lines out, music blaring—your aver-
on the water 40 miles off the North age recreational fishing craft, except
Carolina coast was a great way to there wasn’t a soul in sight. The idiot
spend a lazy July day. Calm seas, clear must have gone below, leaving his boat
skies, hint of a breeze. Not another cruising along at 10 mph.
boat in sight. Until now. Andrew Sher-
man, a 50-year-old investment adviser “Follow it, Jack,” Andrew said.
from Roanoke, Virginia, spotted a As Jack hit the gas, Andrew gave
speck on the horizon. As the speck ap- several blasts on an air horn. “Hey!
proached, it started to look like a boat. Hey!” the Shermans shouted. Noth-
“Jack,” he yelled to his son, a 21-year- ing. A horrifying new thought took
old U.S. Naval Academy midshipman, shape: The captain had gone below,
“some yahoo’s headed straight at us!” all right—and suffered a heart attack.
Father and son switched places,
Unbelievable. Miles of open ocean, and Andrew maneuvered their boat
and this idiot was on course to T-bone alongside the other while Jack leaped
them. Andrew steered their boat up a onto the other boat’s deck. He turned
couple of lengths just as the interloper the ignition, bringing the boat to a
whizzed by their stern. The Shermans stop. Then he ventured down into the

10 May 2022 | Rd.coM

World of Good

Jack (left) and
Andrew Sherman
caught more than
fish that day.

Reader’s Digest

cabin. He came back up a moment side to relieve himself, zipped up,
later. “Empty,” he said. turned back toward the helm, and
slipped. Suddenly he was in the water.
Stunned, father and son said in uni-
son, “It’s a ghost boat!” He grasped at the boat, but the
smooth hull went gliding along his
Andrew called the Coast Guard. palms. He grabbed wildly for the
“Man overboard,” he told them, then swim ladder, but it slipped between
supplied the coordinates. The two his fingers. In dumbstruck horror he
men could have left it at that, but they watched his boat zoom off, taking his
were curious: What happened to the life jacket with it. His only hope was to
captain? Locating the boat’s GPS sys- paddle three miles back to where he’d
tem, they searched its history log. The last seen other boats.
missing captain had marked points
along his route indicating good fish- When Scheller eventually spotted
ing spots. Then the points abruptly a vessel in the distance, it appeared
stopped a few miles back. to be maneuvering oddly—coming
straight at him, then turning sud-
THE GHOST BOAT’S denly and heading back out. It made
OWNER WAS ALIVE no sense. Nevertheless, this was his
IN THE WATER AND best chance at being saved. He be-
GROWING WEARY. gan to kick wildly, making the biggest
splashes possible. “The next thing you
With Andrew piloting the ghost boat know,” he says, “the boat doesn’t turn
and Jack driving their own craft, they away. It aims right at me.”
headed for that last point. From there,
the two boats made ever-enlarging Only when it sidled up to him did
circles for the next hour. “I ran north it dawn on Scheller: “That’s my boat!”
a bit, then south. And then I ran back
up north again, and then south again,” “You have no idea how happy I am
says Andrew. They were searching for to see you,” Andrew Sherman said,
what he feared would be a body. What hauling him aboard. Other than leg
they didn’t know was that the ghost cramps, Scheller was fine—and grate-
boat’s owner was alive in the water, ful the Shermans had taken the time
and growing weary. to search for him. Other boaters had
heard the call to the Coast Guard on
Two hours earlier, Sascha Scheller, their radios, he says, but only “the
a construction contractor, had been Shermans stayed on the scene.”
fishing for mahi-mahi when nature
called. He leaned over the starboard That evening, when he got home,
Andrew’s wife asked him how his day
had gone. “It was a slow day catching
fish,” he told her. “But we did catch
a man.” RD

12 May 2022

World of Good

Life Cycles

By Andy Simmons

Courtesy MCLindon FaMiLy Foundation A bout 15 years ago, Andrew McLindon and a lucky bike recipient
McLindon, an entrepreneur
and avid cyclist, was riding his discount. For kids lucky enough to get
bike in Austin, Texas, when he thought one, they’re a life changer.
about a friend’s 12-year-old son. The
boy had never known the joy of biking “We worked with a 14-year-old who
because he suffered from hydrocepha- has spina bifida,” says McLindon. “She
lus, a buildup of fluid in the brain that spent most days on the couch watch-
often causes balance disturbances. ing TV. Soon after she got her bike,
she was training for special-needs
When he got home, McLindon, now triathlons. In a magazine interview,
60, went online and found a three- she said, ‘I always knew there was an
wheel recumbent bike with a seat belt, athlete in me.’”
perfect for a child with balance issues.
Soon the boy was pedaling around the So far, the foundation has given
street with his peers, having fun and away 450 bikes, and that’s just a start.
getting exercise. But there was more, “I do a lot of things. I run a lot of com-
as McLindon gleaned from his friend’s panies,” McLindon says. “But getting
reaction. “To see his son interacting these kids their bikes is the most im-
with other kids,” McLindon says. “I’ll portant thing that I do.” RD
never forget the smile on his face.”

That smile launched the McLindon
Family Foundation. Funded by dona-
tions, the group works with pediatric
rehab clinics to find children who
can benefit from owning an adaptive
bike—and to help craft each bike to
the particular needs of the child. A
bike may include a headrest, a shoul-
der harness, a seat belt, and a caregiv-
er’s steering and braking mechanism
in the back. The bikes are expen-
sive—$3,000 to $4,000, and that’s with
the foundation’s steep manufacturer’s

Rd.com 13

Reader’s Digest

EVERYDAY MIRACLES

Breaking Ground

By Ryan Hockensmith

From ESPN

T he steps at the back of David He’d recently joined two Facebook
Olson’s house in Norton Shores, groups about people making strange
Michigan, were crumbling and discoveries, and now he had made
had to go. So one day last July, Olson one of his own. He posted some pic-
decided to start the demo job himself. tures to Facebook, then continued his
work. All afternoon, Olson shoveled
Olson yanked the first cinder block out sand and bowling balls.
up with his hands. He took a step
back, surprised to see that the ground “I had to get to the bottom,” he says.
underneath was sand, not dirt. Even “I couldn’t stop.” As Olson reached
more surprising, there were three the last step, his whole body ached.
bowling balls in the hole he’d made. He counted the balls and was stunned
“No way,” Olson said out loud. to get 158. Where did they come from?

14 May 2022 illustration by Ben Kirchner

World of Good

Muskegon, Michigan, only a few That boy was David Olson.
miles from where Olson lives in And that wasn’t the end of it. Weeks
Norton Shores, is home to the head­ after posting his find on Facebook,
quarters of Brunswick Bowling Prod­ Olson heard from someone at a local
ucts. The balls Olson dug up are restaurant who asked to use the balls
Brunswicks, so those dots were easy to in what was billed as a Flintstones
connect. But that didn’t explain how bowling tournament, where partici­
so many of them got into the ground pants would palm and chuck balls at
behind his house. pins set up in the street. In exchange,
Olson and his wife could play for free.
A local woman named Judy Hepler The Olsons have three young kids.
had a theory. Her husband, Mike Hep­ It can be hard to find time for just the
ler, had worked at the Muskegon plant two of them. So they got a babysitter
for 48 years, testing bowling balls to and went on a rare dinner date.
make sure they were perfectly round
and dense. Those that weren’t landed THESE BOWLING
in the dumpster behind the factory. BALLS WERE MORE
THAN JUST A BIZARRE
Mike, who died in 2009, told Judy BACKYARD DISCOVERY.
that sometimes homeowners would
take discarded balls to use as filler for Neither of them had bowled in
their backyards. Sand and bowling years, but they eked out a win in their
balls wouldn’t pass any town code first matchup. Then they won again.
these days, but the combination is And again. As David and Megan Olson
structurally sound, relatively speak­ kept winning, they started to believe
ing. Most highways are built using the that these bowling balls were more
same basic principle, with pavement than just a bizarre backyard discov­
over a rock foundation. ery. David thought they must have
an advantage since he had found the
Mike had cared deeply about his balls. Still, as they left that night with
job, but he’d also grumbled about it. their championship trophy, they were
Judy remembers when their grandson a little weirded out.
was young, Mike would tell the little
guy stories of needling his bosses. “That makes it feel like fate,” David
says. “I feel the universe is telling me
So Judy wasn’t shocked that some­ that our family should be bowling.” RD
one had found 158 bowling balls
(plus four others found later) behind Espn.com (octobEr 28, 2021), copyright © 2021
a house. No, what left her in disbelief by Espn
was who found them. Because her
grandson, the one who had listened
to all those stories about goofing on
Brunswick management?

Rd.com 15

Reader’s Digest World of Good

BEST PET PALS

Porkchop Neighbors set up a pig-spotting page brian munoz
aka Ernestine on Facebook, where we posted photos
and videos of Porkchop, as we named
herrin, illinois her. Eventually, the sightings began
causing traffic jams. We learned Pork-
O ne day I noticed an animal near chop was a repeat escape artist from a
the woods by my house. It wasn’t local farm. By now, the farmer thought
a skunk, an opossum, or a fox—in her more trouble than she was worth.
fact, it seemed to have no fur at all.
A nearby hobby farm was happy to
Weeks later, I got a clear view of the give Porkchop a new home and even a
critter: a big pink pig. I couldn’t imag- new name: Ernestine. Two years later,
ine how a pig had strayed into our sub- Ernestine is thriving with ample friends,
urb, but she decided to move in. I left food, and mud to wallow in. And as the
a bucket of water out, which she drank town’s most famous resident, she even
politely at first but then dumped to gets a float in Herrin’s spring parade. RD
make a mud puddle. Soon she was seen —Nominated by Joanne Clayton
wandering the neighborhood with her
new bestie, a black Lab named Harley. (To submit your Pet Pal and see
terms, go to rd.com/petpals.)

16 May 2022 | Rd.coM



Reader’s Digest

LIFE

in these
United States

My wife was dismayed saw him, when, with Ah, married life. While
when my sister told arms wide open, he shopping for vacation
us that our two-year- ran right past me and clothes, my husband
old nephew was con- to my wife, shouting, and I passed a display
stantly asking to see “Uncle Chris! Uncle of bathing suits. It had
me and never men- Chris!” been at least ten years
tioning her. She could —Chris Yodice and 20 pounds since
not figure out why a Levittown, New York I had even considered
toddler would prefer buying a bathing suit,
his Uncle Chris (me) I can’t do small talk. so I sought my hus-
to his Aunt Crissy I just asked the lady band’s advice.
(her). I basked in my cutting my hair what
status as the favorite she does for a living. “What do you
until the next time we — @momjeansplease think?” I asked him.
“Should I get a bikini

18 mAY 2022 Cartoon by Ron Bardelli

World of Good

or an all-in-one?” Lot of people texting audio messages
“Better get a bikini,” these days, and I fear it’s a slippery slope
to going back to phone calls.
he replied. “You’d
never get it all in one.” — @tomathakkar

—Source: GcFl.net

Sally anScombe/Getty ImaGeS Would be a lot easier MAMA MIA! to make it, Sweetie.
My ten-year-old: No,
if my therapist could Let’s wish all she doesn’t.
just shadow me for moms a happy — @Wordesse
a day. Mother’s Day.
— @danielleweisber After all, look ✦✦ In case you were
what they put wondering, the loudest
During and after film- up with: sound in the world is my
ing the Netflix movie kid screaming “Are you
Don’t Look Up, actor ✦✦ No one is as glued pooping?!?” in a public
Jonah Hill took to to any piece of reading restroom.
calling his costar, material as a parent — @UnfilteredMama
three-time Academy counting down the
Award–winner Meryl songs in the program ✦✦ “You’re ugly!”
Streep, “The Goat.” The for a school concert. “No, you’re ugly!” My
72-year-old Streep — @copymama identical twins, fighting.
took it all in stride. — @MamaNeedsACoke
“I thought, well, that’s ✦✦ My six-year-old:
cute, I am kind of an I figured out the pass- Your funny story
old goat,” she said word to the tablet and could be worth $$$.
during a press confer- bypassed the parental For details, go to
ence. It was left up controls to download all rd.com/submit.
to another, younger my shows. Also my six-
costar, Jennifer year-old: Help! I put both
Lawrence, to explain my legs in the same pant
to Streep that Hill hole and now I’m stuck!
wasn’t being mean. — @not_thenanny
“The G.O.A.T.,” Law-
rence told Streep, ✦✦ My ten-year-old:
“stands for Greatest Grandma, can you
of All Time.” teach Mom how to
make this dessert?
Source: the tonIGht Show My mom: Oh, she
already knows how

Rd.com 19



Reader’s Digest

We Found a

FIX

Helps, Hacks,
& How to

1 EntErtaining 12 oz. Beer
Put Your Plastic
Cups to Work 5 oz. Wine
1 oz. Liquor
If you find yourself playing
bartender at a cookout or
tailgate party, use the lines
on those red plastic cups to
help keep the good times
flowing. The bottom line
indicates one ounce—that’s
a modest shot of liquor (for a
celebratory round or cocktail
measurement). The second
line from the bottom is five
ounces (hello, a crisp serving
of wine or summer sangria).
The third is 12 ounces (one
cheer for one beer, please).
And for the teetotalers, one
ounce of grenadine, five
ounces of Sprite, and some
ice mix to make a refreshing
Shirley Temple.

tmb studio From RD.com, tasteofhome.com, familyhandyman.com,
and THEHEALTHY.COM

Photographs by K. Synold Rd.com | may 2022 21

Reader’s Digest We Found a Fix

2 grooming
A Hair Dryer That Won’t Blow It
Why ruin the peace after a morning shower with the racket of a
blow-dryer just because a towel-dry won’t do the job in time? Fold
that time in half by wrapping your mane not in a cotton towel but
in a microfiber one; it will wick away moisture 40 percent faster.

3 teCh/travel 4 home
Flight Tracker Permanent
For all you iPhone-owning jet- Tiki Torch Holders

setters, message your airport pickup Wrestling tiki torches into the ground only
the airline and flight number (e.g., to pick them up after every stiff breeze?
Trusted Airlines 1922). Then your ride Here’s a sturdy solution: Grab PVC piping
can tap on the iMessage text to auto- from the hardware store and cut it into
matically open a flight tracker displaying five-inch lengths with a handsaw. Drive
takeoff and arrival times, terminal and pipes into the grass until the openings
gate assignments, and even flight status are ground level, clearing away any dirt
to anticipate any delays instead of wait- inside. You can slide torches in and out
ing in the dark of the cell phone lot. with ease, and they’ll withstand the wind.

5 Cooking
A New Twist on an
Old Favorite
Before placing bacon on a bak-
ing sheet to cook it in the oven,
hold each strip vertically and
twist it. Turning the strips
into twists guarantees ultra-
crispy bacon every time: No
more gnawing through the
floppy sections to get to the
treasured crunchiness. Plus,
it’s a space saver that’ll allow
you to fit more on the pan.

22 May 2022

6 cleAning
Shine a Light on Broken Glass
The next time you break a glass—not that we’re betting against
you, we’re just betting on gravity—get all the big pieces out of the
way and then cut the lights. Shining a flashlight at floor level will
make even the tiniest shards glisten. Then you can gather them
with a wet paper towel instead of the bottom of your foot.

7 Money 8 Auto
Pay Off Your Putting on the
Mortgage Faster (Tire) Pressure

Certified personal finance counselor Some say there’s a direct link between
Andrew Latham suggests a smart way to tire pressure and the blood pressure of
get ahead on your mortgage: Make pay- drivers across the country: When you
ments biweekly instead of monthly. By neglect to check one, it actually raises
paying half your monthly mortgage every the other. So, in addition to checking
two weeks, you’ll sneak 13 payments into your tires monthly, inflate them to the
a year, helping pay off principal faster and recommended psi listed on the car-
decrease overall interest. “On a $200,000 maker’s decal (found on your driver’s
mortgage with a 30-year term and 5 per- door jamb or in the owner’s manual), not
cent interest rate, it can save $34,724 in to the psi printed on the tire. Tire pres-
interest and repay the mortgage nearly sure is based on the weight of your vehi-
five years early,” says Latham. cle, not on the tire brand or tread style. RD

Rd.com 23

We Found a Fix

Humor in

UNIFORM

My son was stationed “So, how did you do on your sniper exam?”
in Korea, and I
couldn’t stop thinking It’s not news that my order to the
about him. So I baked seasoned Marines sergeant in charge:
a batch of his favorite like to have fun with “I’m here to pick up
cookies, packed them newbies. I had just three feet of salad bar.”
in a shoebox, wrapped landed on mess hall
the box, and sent duty when my ser- It took a while before
it halfway around geant ordered me to I realized what they
the world. double-time it over were laughing about.
to another mess hall —Loren Dawson
When he came on base, ask for a Junction City, Kansas
home on leave, I asked much-needed item,
if he’d enjoyed the and bring it back, got a story about
cookies. He gave me pronto. After he told the military or your
a quizzical look and me what it was, I ran military family? It
said, “Mom, you sent off, eager to fulfill could be worth $$$.
me your red shoes.” my mission. When For details, go to p. 2
—Joan Shelton I arrived, I repeated or rd.com/submit.
Raleigh, North Carolina

“Son, when the
Marine Corps wants
you to have a wife, you
will be issued one.”
—marine corps lt.
Gen. Lewis “Chesty”
Puller (1898-1971)
to a Marine who asked
permission to be married

24 May 2022 | Rd.coM Cartoon by Bill Thomas

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Reader’s Digest

FOOD naturally on plants, is quite tolerant of tmb studio
salt—so upping the sodium stacks the
for Thought deck in its favor. The salt draws water
out of the vegetable, creating a brine,
Beyond and the lactobacillus bacteria, thriv-
Sauerkraut ing in their salty bath, eat the natural
sugars in the cabbage, producing lactic
It’s often said that sauerkraut acid (which is what makes sauerkraut
originated not in Germany, not sour) as a by-product. And voilà: The
in Austria, and not in a baseball cabbage is fermented.
stadium, but rather in China dur-
ing the construction of the Great Lactobacillus ferments other foods
Wall. As the widely reported—yet as well, such as old-fashioned pickles
fully unconfirmed—story goes, the (the shelf-stable ones in the grocery
builders subsisted on rice and cab- store are made with vinegar instead
bage, dousing the latter with rice wine of fermentation) and many of the Ko-
to preserve it all winter long, which rean pickled vegetables called kimchi.
also made it sour. And while not by the same process,
different species of lactobacillus also
While the real origin story remains help turn milk into yogurt and cheese.
unknown, what we do know is that
the concept arose from a wintertime The American approach to sauer-
need to preserve produce, back when kraut—toss it on a hot dog, call it a
refrigeration wasn’t a thing. As for the day—springs from the European tra-
name, that does come from Germany. dition of eating pickled cabbage with
It means, simply, “sour cabbage.” bratwurst and heavy smoked meats.
You’ll also find sauerkraut alongside
The key to making sauerkraut is the corned beef on a Reuben sand-
lacto-fermentation, which is what wich, but it works well with any rich,
happens when you take cabbage fatty food, thanks to its cutting tartness.
and pack it with salt. This creates an
environment hostile to the microbes When you’re shopping, try to get
that would normally come along and kraut from the refrigerated section—
cause a food to rot. Lactobacillus, a this is likely to be the fermented
type of probiotic (good) bacteria found version that is still teeming with pro-
biotics. (Putting it in the fridge slows
the souring; without this step the
kraut can get mushy and too sour.)
The canned stuff is pasteurized, which
means it’s been cooked, and all that
delightfully souring bacteria is dead.
And what’s the fun in that? RD

26 May 2022 Photographs by K. Synold

We Found a Fix

CREAMY, KRAUT-Y
POTATO SALAD

Cut 3 pounds skin-on red potatoes
(about 7 medium) into slices 1 inch
thick. Place potatoes in a medium pot
and cover with at least 1 inch of cold
water; season generously with salt (the
water should taste slightly salty), bring
to a simmer, and cook until potatoes
are tender but still holding their shape,
about 15 minutes. Drain and let cool.
While the potatoes are cooking, cut
1 medium red onion into rings, then
toss in a small mixing bowl with 1/4 cup
red wine vinegar. Let stand, stirring
every few minutes, until onion rings
are bright pink, about 20 minutes. Stir
in 1 cup sour cream along with 1/2 cup
drained and chopped sauerkraut, 1/2 cup
minced fresh dill, and 2 tablespoons
whole grain mustard. Season with salt
and pepper. Gently stir the sour cream
dressing and cooled potatoes until slices
are well coated. Season with additional
salt if desired. Serve right away, or re-
frigerate up to 8 hours before serving.

Rd.com 27

Reader’s Digest

13 THINGS

What Your Pet
Is Trying to Tell You

28 May 2022 By Emily Goodman

1Put down your
phone! Animals
want our attention,
and sometimes they’re
quite overt about ask-
ing for it. Antics are
often our pets’ way of
telling us to stop what
we’re doing and play
with them. It’s why
Fido constantly chases
his tail and why Kitty
keeps rolling around.
A desperately bored
pet may resort to
“bad” behaviors to
elicit a reaction—even
a negative one!

2 Feed me. Sure,
your dog loves
you, but that’s not
why he’s licking your
face. A puppy learns to
lick his mother’s mouth
to snag a little leftover

illustration by Serge Bloch

We Found a Fix

food, so Spot isn’t kiss- 5 Don’t dismiss be tired but agitated,
ing you in our sense of my accidents. not bored but stressed.
the word; he just wants Similarly, lip-licking—
a snack. A house-trained when there isn’t food
dog that suddenly goes around to trigger it—is
3 I’m stressed. on the carpet could another sign of duress.
Cat owners also simply be dehydrated,
misinterpret their but he could also have 7 Let’s stay in.
furry friends’ kisses. kidney failure, liver You might think
While a cat might lick disease, or diabetes. your pooch is
you to show affection, And a cat that sprays running around the
sometimes she’ll do it outside her litter box backyard, having the
to soothe herself. One might have kidney time of his life while
way to tell if her licking stones or a urinary tract you’re away. But the
is stress-related is if it infection, so mention reality is that he’s
goes on for an extended your pets’ accidents to most likely just sitting
period of time. Birds the vet, especially if in one spot for hours,
also overgroom when they keep happening. anxiously waiting for
they feel anxious. Some Once you rule out a you to return. Dogs
will even pluck out medical issue, try get- actually prefer to be
their own feathers. ting another litter box inside, ideally with
for your cat. If he keeps their owners.
4 My tail tells all. missing, he probably
Dogs wag their dislikes the box or 8 But I do need
tails to the right wants another. (Cats alone time. If your
when they see some- generally need more dog seems scared
thing (or someone) than one.) (because he’s hiding,
they want to approach, say, or excessively
and to the left when 6 I can’t even look panting), but showing
they see something at you. At some no obvious signs of
they want to avoid. point you’ve distress, try giving him
When frightened, dogs probably uttered these a break from people—
tuck their tails in, while words to someone who yourself included. Even
cats wrap theirs around made you angry. Dogs the most attention-
themselves. And if a think similarly, avoid- hungry hound can
tabby’s tail looks like ing eye contact with benefit from having
a question mark, she’s anyone who spoils a calm space of his
itching to play—espe- their mood. Another own to relax in, even
cially if the tip twitches. sign of ire: yawning. A if it’s just a crate.
yawning pup may not

Rd.com 29

Reader’s Digest We Found a Fix

9 Take my rear end also be hurting, usually or favorite activities is
in your face as a in the chest or abdo- a telltale sign of depres-
men. But if a tabby tilts sion. A dog that pulls
compliment. When her head to one side, it her ears back is likely
a cat presents you with might mean she has experiencing anxiety
his behind, it means he pain there. If any of (though she could also
sees you as a maternal these postures persist, be suffering from an
figure, since he used have your vet help you ear infection). Mention
to do that as a kitten to pin down the issue. these behaviors to
get his mother to groom your vet, and don’t be
him. Another sure sign 11A storm is afraid to ask about pet
you’ve won his heart is coming. When antidepressants.
if he blinks slowly while your dog bugs
looking at you. He isn’t out, pay attention—es- 13 But you make
tired: He’s showing that pecially if you live near me so happy!
he’s comfortable letting a fault line. Even if you
his guard down around see clear skies, your When they
you. Likewise, a dog pup might be sensing wiggle and wag their
that shows you his belly barometric pressure whole bodies, your
isn’t just inviting a rub. changes or even smell- dancing dogs and
Rolling over is a sign of ing the impending rain. bouncing bunnies are
submission, which is The Max Planck Insti- literally jumping for
how dogs convey trust. tute of Animal Behavior joy. Birds that bob up
found that dogs can de- and down and cats
10 My tummy tect earthquakes up to that come when you
hurts. If your 20 hours ahead of time. call them are showing
dog arches his their appreciation for
back while tucking his 12 I might be you. And when your
belly up, he’s in pain— depressed. pets put their paws
likely gastrointestinal on you, seemingly for
discomfort, but it Pets have no reason, they’re
could also be his back. mental health needs gently showing you
A crouching cat could too. Disinterest in food their gratitude. RD

Guilt by Association

I understand your anger at me, but what could you
possibly have against the horse I rode in on?

@mariana057

30 May 2022 | Rd.coM

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Reader’s Digest

All
in a Day’s

WORK

During a flight from just read her father’s Correction from Vulture
Seattle to Chicago, my chart and couldn’t .com: “This article
neighbor, a flight atten- understand why he originally claimed that
dant, split the back was so disliked by the Ben Platt’s Dear Evan
of his pants. No prob- staff. It took a while, Hansen haircut was a
lem—he simply turned but I was finally able wig. It is, astoundingly,
around and stationed to explain to her that his own hair.”
himself in front of the the offending com-
beverage cart, facing ment on the chart, Source: Buzzfeed.com
forward. It worked, or “S.O.B.,” was a nursing
so he thought, until abbreviation for “short My coworker asked the
he got to the last row, of breath.” tattoo artist to draw the
and a female passen- —Dennis Bechmann Chinese character for
ger leaned over and Jamestown, New York “free” that he found
whispered, “Your fly using a translation app.
is open.”
—Yefim M. Brodd
Kirkland, Washington

The irate daughter

of one of our nursing
home residents
stormed into my
office demanding
answers. She had

32 mAY 2022 Cartoon © Dave Blazek • LoosePartsComic.com

We Found a Fix

Turns out, it was very 911 AROUND because he dated the
close to being accu- THE GLOBE 35 women just to get
rate, but not quite. 35 birthday gifts. After
His new tattoo actually ✦✦ Lure It with Jam a few grew suspicious,
reads “tax free.” Authorities in Poland Miyagawa was arrested
received a report of an and charged with swin-
Source: boredpanda.com unusual animal lurking dling them. One online
in a tree, terrorizing an commentator admitted,
Every year, the prison apartment house. “Peo- “He’s an awful person,
where I work as a ple aren’t opening their but I envy his time-
volunteer chaplain windows because they’re management skills.”
holds a training ses- afraid it will go inside,”
sion for staff. This the caller said. Officers Source: TimeSnownewS.com
year, the instructor wondered if the animal
kicked things off by was a bird of prey, but ✦✦ Where Am I?
asking, “What kind the frightened caller
of people do you work said it more closely After a hard night of
among?” resembled an iguana. drinking, a Turkish
They were all wrong. man woke up in the
He was instantly The beast in question forest. As he headed
bombarded with turned out to be a home, he came upon
a slew of angry re- croissant someone had a search party looking
sponses: “They’re tossed out the window. for a missing man. Being
lazy!” “They can’t be a good citizen, he offered
trusted!” “They steal!” Source: The bbc to help—which he did
“They lie!” until they began calling
✦✦ More Presents! out a familiar name,
“And,” another col- At one point, Takashi his. Beyhan Mutlu had
league added, “some Miyagawa, 39, was dat- been reported missing
of the inmates aren’t ing 35 women simulta- by his wife, and the
all that nice, either.” neously. But where some rescuers could now
—H. D. Pattison might see a Casanova, say that he had been
Colorado Springs, others saw a cad. That’s found, with the help
Colorado of Beyhan Mutlu.

Source: aSSociaTed preSS

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HEALTHY

Wellness from Thehealthy.com

Skin Care
for Warmer

Weather

Simple steps to take
for healthy skin in
spring and summer

By Jenn Sinrich

Illustrations by James Steinberg

T his time of year in most
parts of the country, a change
of weather means a change of
clothing. Down and fleece outer gar-
ments get shed in favor of light sweat-
ers and jackets, and eventually just
T-shirts. But simply changing clothing
isn’t enough to keep our skin healthy
as the seasons change. We asked der-
matologists for their best tips on tak-
ing care of skin—the body’s largest
organ—as the temperature rises.

Rd.com | may 2022 35

Reader’s Digest The Healthy

Pay attention to pollen Up your SPF
Temperature isn’t the only thing that Everyone should wear sunscreen
rises in spring. Pollen counts go up year-round, but dermatologists agree
too, and allergies may be exacerbated. that it’s even more important during
“Allergies to pollen or any other envi- the warmer months. “Not only are
ronmental allergen can create red- you spending more time outside, but
ness and inflammation underneath also the UVA/UVB rays can be more
the eyes,” says Whitney Bowe, MD, intense, and the damage accumulates
a dermatologist based in New York over your lifetime,” says Dendy En-
City. “When that happens, it makes gelman, MD, a New York City-based
under-eye bags larger and wrinkles dermatologist. “Incidental sun expo-
around the eyes more pronounced.” sure, even for only 10 to 15 minutes
Talk to a dermatologist about pre- a day, adds up over time and can
scription ingredients that can heal cause significant sun damage and
the skin and calm the inflammation. If accelerated photoaging, hyperpig-
you’re prone to allergies, your doctor mentation, and wrinkles. Using a high-
may recommend taking an over-the- SPF sunscreen—30 SPF at minimum,
counter nonsedating antihistamine and 50 SPF ideally—can reduce the
each morning, for example, to help accumulation of chronic UV damage
avoid flare-ups. that’s linked to non-melanoma skin

i tried it... Peter Dazeley/Getty ImaGes

Mole Mapping

Mole mapping is recommended for people at
high risk for skin cancer, which includes me:
I have fair skin, I’m covered in moles, and I have
two grandparents who were diagnosed with
melanoma. The procedure involves a skin
specialist taking photographs of every mole,
then watching for potentially dangerous skin
changes. For my mole mapping, I stood in a room
wearing only my underwear. I was self-conscious,
but I’ll take embarrassment over skin cancer any
day. I assumed a series of poses so the camera could capture every inch of
skin. Thankfully the photos didn’t reveal anything that needed to be biopsied
or checked out further. All good until next year. —Ashley Lewis

36 May 2022

cancer and aging.” (For more on how Consider your cleanser
dermatologists detect skin cancer at its Mild soap is useful in cold, dry
earliest stage, see “I Tried It” at left.) weather, but a slightly more acidic
cleanser will help to control shine and
Spring-clean your skin products sweat more efficiently, especially for
There are no U.S. Food and Drug people whose skin is oily to start with.
Administration regulations for skin- “This is particularly true as spring
care product expiration dates, though days become much warmer in the af-
some products do show a suggested ternoon than the morning,” says der-
expiration date. But over time, matologist S. Manjula Jegasothy, MD,
products may discolor, smell funny, or CEO and founder of Miami Skin Insti-
become contaminated with bacteria. tute. “Your cleanser should keep your
“Go through your skin-care products skin clean and sweat-free throughout
and sunscreens, and toss the things the day, which a more acidic cleanser
that have been around a little too is likely to do.” Look for ingredients
long,” says Dr. Bowe. That includes such as alcohol, salicylic acid, and
cosmetics, shaving creams, and beard glycolic acid.
oil. Anything you apply near your lips
or eyes should be tossed after a year. Exfoliate extra
And don’t forget to clean your brushes, “Mild exfoliation, twice a week at
combs, sponges, and razors. most, will remove dull dead skin cells

Rd.com 37

Reader’s Digest

from the skin surface,” says Tsippora Add an antioxidant
Shainhouse, MD, a dermatologist Antioxidants are particularly impor-
based in Beverly Hills, California. tant during the summer, when stron-
“When dead skin cells are combined ger UV rays can damage unprotected
with sweat, grease, and skin-care skin. “Not only can too much sun
products, they can clog pores and lead lead to direct DNA damage, but it can
to acne.” Avoid cleansers that exfoli- also break down collagen and elastin,
ate with rough pieces such as shells, due to UV-induced free radicals,” ex-
nuts, and microbeads. Look for gentler plains Dr. Shainhouse. Apply an anti-
products that contain salts and sugars, oxidant serum, such as vitamin C, in
or enzymatic scrubs with fruit acids. the morning after cleansing your face
and before applying sunscreen to help
Lighten up the lotion strengthen the skin barrier.
In the winter, heavier face and body
moisturizers help combat the cold Reduce retinol
and dry air, but when temperatures Many products marketed to both men
rise, so does humidity. “During the and women contain the vitamin-A
warmer seasons, lighter lotions will derivative retinol, a milder over-the-
likely provide enough moisture for counter version of Retin-A, which is
the skin, while heavier formulations available by prescription only. The
may lead to clogged pores and break- fountain-of-youth potion that prom-
outs,” says Melissa Piliang, MD, a der- ises to reduce fine lines and wrinkles,
matologist at the Cleveland Clinic in strengthen skin, and even out skin
Ohio. Look for products that contain tone can make your skin more sensi-
ceramides and hyaluronic acid, which tive to sun. “Retinol boosts cell turn-
are both hydrating agents. over, which means it eliminates dead
skin cells and replaces them with
Go easy on makeup new ones—and these healthy new
Heavy foundations and concealers cells are more sensitive and prone to
can cause buildup and lead to break- burning from the sun’s rays,” says Joel
outs. This is even more likely during Schlessinger, MD, a dermatologist in
the spring and summer, when heat Omaha, Nebraska. You can still use
and humidity can lead to sweat and retinol during the spring and sum-
clogged skin, says Dr. Engelman. mer months, but apply it at bedtime
“Switching to lighter products, such as instead of in the morning, and use a
a CC cream or mineral powder foun- strong sunscreen. “If your skin gets
dation, will balance out the extra oil irritated by retinol use, reduce the
production and leave your skin look- frequency to only one or two times
ing healthier,” she says. a week,” Dr. Shainhouse suggests. RD

38 May 2022

The Healthy

E-Bike or bend your left arm up at a right an-
Safety Tips gle). Don’t talk on the phone, text, or
listen to music. And if you’re an e-bike
by Beth Weinhouse rider, heed these tips too:

• Be sure your Bike is ready to ride.

That starts with checking that the tires
are inflated and the brakes are work-
ing properly. If the bicycle hasn’t been
used for a while, take it for a tune-up
before you take it for a ride. “For an
e-bike, also make sure your battery
is charged,” says Ash Lovell, electric
bicycle policy director at People for
Bikes, a cyclist advocacy organiza-
tion. And before and after every ride,
inspect your bicycle for damage.

B efore you go on your next two- • Be aware of your speed. This is im-
wheeled adventure, make sure portant for e-bike riders. “With the
you’re familiar with the ins and ability to go faster comes the respon-
outs of bicycle safety. This holds true sibility to know when you should slow
whether you’re riding a traditional down,” says Lovell.
bike or an e-bike—one powered
by an electric motor in addition to • know the rules of the road. “When
your pedaling. you’re riding in the street, even in a
protected bike lane, read the signals,
Many of the safety recommenda- pay attention to the lane markings,
tions are the same for both types of and check the signage to see where
bikes. Wear a helmet. Ride with the e-bikes are allowed,” Lovell says.
flow of traffic rather than against it. Thirty-six states have adopted a clas-
Make sure you’re visible to motorists sification system for e-bikes; signs
(some e-bikes now come with lights). in those states may specify which
Know how to use your arm to signal types of bikes are allowed on which
turns (left: extend your left arm out to roads and paths. Check the People
the side; right: extend your right arm for Bikes website (peopleforbikes.org)
for more information. RD

Rd.com 39

Social Envy Is Toxic

News From the Last year, a whistle- levi brown
blower from Facebook
WORLD OF revealed that the social
MEDICINE media giant knew from
internal studies that one
By Mark Witten of its parent company’s
platforms, Instagram,
THERAPY FOR BACK PAIN made people feel worse
about themselves, con-
More than 80 percent of American adults tributing to increased
will experience chronic lower back pain depression and anxiety.
at some point in their lives—and it’s notori- This was attributed to
ously difficult to treat. Chronic pain can users constantly evalu-
be like a false alarm stuck in the on posi- ating themselves against
tion, with certain brain networks overreact- others. Perhaps unsur-
ing to even mild pain stimuli. In a University prisingly, social com-
of Colorado study, two-thirds of the chronic parisons are bad for
back pain patients who underwent four your physical health
weeks of pain reprocessing therapy (PRT) as well. According to
were pain-free or nearly pain-free after one a study published in the
year. In PRT sessions, patients learn to think Journal of the American
about pain as safe, rather than threatening, Heart Association,
as they do things they’d been afraid to do. people who ranked
These results provide strong evidence that their social status low
psychological treatment can deliver lasting in relation to others had
relief for chronic back pain, reducing the higher blood pressure,
need for medications, surgeries, and other cholesterol, blood sugar,
invasive treatments that can be costly, and body mass index,
ineffective, and even dangerous. raising their risk for
heart disease and type 2
diabetes. Researchers
suggest counterbalanc-
ing time spent on social
media by making an
effort to join supportive,
inclusive social groups,
whether online or off.

40 May 2022

The Healthy Reader’s Digest

PATTARISARA SUVICHANARAKUL/GETTY IMAGES (HAND). “Smart” Bandages AI HELPS Language
UMBERTOPANTALONE/GETTY IMAGES (LAPTOP), BLUEPLANETEARTH/GETTY IMAGES (MAMMOGRAM) Detect Infection RULE OUT Brain Gains
BREAST
Usually, if you want to CANCER A University of Kansas
see whether a wound study has shown that,
is healing properly, Mammograms help if given the opportunity
you need to remove the save lives through early for immersive learning,
bandage, which can be detection of cancer. adults can pick up a
painful and risky, giving Unfortunately, screen- new language almost as
bacteria and other ing is about four times easily as kids do. When
pathogens a chance to more likely to miss learning a language,
attack. But now, Austra- detecting cancer in the brain builds white-
lian researchers at Royal women with extremely matter connections
Melbourne Institute of dense breasts, who have between brain areas,
Technology University twice the risk of devel- leading to better mem-
have developed “smart” oping breast cancer ory skills, focus, and
wound dressings that as the average woman. agility in switching from
detect biochemical Now, a Netherlands one task to another.
changes in the skin. The study has shown that an
dressings glow brightly artificial intelligence– Baking with Less
under UV light if infec- based screening tool Salt Has Benefits
tion starts to set in. Or, if currently being tested
the wound was already can rule out cancer for Globally, people con-
infected, the absence 40 percent of patients sume an average of
of the fluorescent glow with extremely dense 10.1 grams of salt per
signals that the infection breasts and no detect- day—twice the recom-
has cleared. After more able lumps. This will mended maximum
tests, the product will allow radiologists to amount and a rate that
be available to doctors focus on less-certain raises the risk for heart
around the world. cases more quickly. disease, stroke, and kid-
ney disease. According
to a University of Illinois
study, reducing salt in
baking doesn’t mean
decreasing taste or leav-
ening ability. The re-
searchers suggest using
half the amount of salt
called for in recipes. RD

Rd.com 41

Reader’s Digest

LAUGHTER

The best Medicine

No one or thing is he died: “Are you still up? At a meeting, why
immortal ... especially holding the ladder?” does a topic come up?
these jokes: Why do we speak up,
✦✦The guy who stole What’s Up with “Up”? and why is it up to the
my diary just died. assistant to write up
My thoughts are We seem to be mixed a report?
with his family. up about “up.” Look up
✦✦I was reading a “up” in a dictionary We call up our
great book about a and you’ll find about friends, brighten up a
death-defying dog the 30 definitions. It’s easy room, polish up the sil-
other day. It was im- to understand “up,” ver, warm up the left-
possible to put down. meaning toward the overs, and clean up the
✦✦I’ll never forget sky or at the top of the kitchen. We lock up the
my granddad’s last list, but when we house and fix up the
words to me just before awaken in the morn- old car. At other times,
ing, why do we wake people stir up trouble,

42 mAY 2022 Cartoon by Bob Eckstein

line up for tickets, on the scene shakes The Healthy
and think up excuses. his head in disgust. “Oh, no!” he cries.
To be dressed is one “Unbelievable,” he “My Rolex!”
thing but to be dressed says. “You’re so
up is special. focused on your Source: watchuSeek.com
possessions that
And “up” is contra- you didn’t even Me, arriving late to
dictory: When it threat- realize your left things: “Sorry, supply
ens to rain, we say it’s arm was shorn off chain problems.”
clouding up. When when the truck hit — @delia_cai
the sun comes out, you.” Got a funny joke?
we say it’s clearing up. It could be worth $$$.
If it rains, no worries The hedge fund For details, go to p. 2
since the earth will manager looks down or rd.com/submit.
soak it up. Of course, in absolute horror.
if it doesn’t rain for a Rd.com 43
while, things dry up.

One could go on
and on, but I think
I’ll just shut up.

Source: Planet Proctor

What do you get

when a telescope
bangs into a micro-
scope? A kaleidoscope.
—Submitted by Julia K.
Earlville, New York

As the hedge fund

manager steps out
of his Porsche, a truck
goes racing by, taking
the door off the hinges.

“My Porsche! My
beautiful silver Porsche
is ruined!” he screams.

A police officer

WHERE, OH WHERE?

Theresa PeTerson (counTry)

Reader’s Digest

Looking at this lush landscape,
you wouldn’t guess that back in the
summer of 2018, just as farmers
here were preparing to harvest their
best wheat crop in decades, a series
of terrible fires scorched these fields
black. Resilient farmers then spent the
fall and winter planting cover crops to
salvage the more than 200,000 acres of
soil that burned that fire season—the
worst in the area’s history. This photo
was taken the following spring, showing
the verdant result of all their hard work.
But where is it? (Answer on page 115.)

A Dufur, Oregon
B Hardin, Montana
C Williston, North Dakota
D Colby, Kansas

Rd.com | may 2022 45

Photographs by K. Synold

COVER STORY

A delectable collection
of stories about community

and kindness

Rd.com 47

THE works for the city’s water department. inset photo: courtesy Al nixon
SUNSHINE A year later, a woman stopped to

MAYOR say hello, and she said something that
changed his perspective on his daily
By Cathy Free ritual. “She said, ‘You know, every
morning when I see you sitting here,
from the washington post I know that everything is going to be
OK,’” Nixon recalled. “That’s when I
A lmost eight years ago, Al knew: I needed to pay attention to the
Nixon decided to begin each people walking past. I needed to make
day from a bench with a spec- eye contact and let people know that
tacular view of the St. Petersburg, we mattered to each other.”
Florida, waterfront.
Instead of staring straight ahead at
“I call it ‘life rising’ because watching the waterfront, Nixon started smiling
a sunrise makes me feel centered be- at people and striking up conversa-
fore starting my day,” said Nixon, who tions. And pretty soon, more than a
few early risers began joining him
on the bench, sometimes unburden-
ing themselves, asking him for advice

48 may 2022