There's No Rule

NO RULE 45

that says teamwork
shouldn’t be the
way to win.

Cliques are so high school.

Don’t let them divide your
organization. Rather, build
strong teams that display
respect toward one another.

Build a strong team.

NO RULE 46

that says frequent
communication is
harmful to you and
others.

In the leadership role, don’t
worry about too much
communication – more is
generally better than less.
Let people know what’s
going on. Hold frequent
conversations with your
teams to keep them
informed.

NO RULE 47

that says to let
others do the
critical thinking.

Your brain comes to work
with you anyway, so you
might as well use it! Be
ready to put those critical
thinking skills to use.

NO RULE 48

that says you don’t
have to work on
building trust every
single day.

Because you do. Be
trustworthy by
demonstrating honesty and
transparency on a daily
basis.

Trust others, as well.

NO RULE 49

that says you
shouldn’t take risks.

Push the envelope.

“Take chances. Make
mistakes. Get messy.” Ms.
Frizzle from the Magic
School Bus gets it.

NO RULE 50

that says you
shouldn’t have
hope.

While hope is not a strategy,
a good leader is a hopeful
person. Everybody wants a
better tomorrow. Be
hopeful.

NO RULE 51

that says you have
to talk first.

People want to be heard.
Silent and listen are formed
with the same letters—
Coincidence?

Listen. And then listen some
more. You’ll be amazed at
the answers you get to the
questions you never had to
ask.

NO RULE 52

that says you can’t
go first when things
get scary.

Go first when things are
scary. Be bold. Be brave.
Your team will follow.

NO RULE 53

that says you can’t

send hand-written

notes.

Email is certainly the norm in
communication, but to make
a lasting statement,
compose a hand-written
note. The note will be saved,
and your message will be
remembered long after you
send it.

NO RULE 54

that says you can’t

be clear about what

needs to be done.

Clarity is an important part
of leadership. Be clear about
what you do and why. Help
others understand their
purpose and roles within the
organization. Be crystal clear.
Say what you mean and
mean what you say.

NO RULE 55

that says someone
else will do the
heavy lifting.

Be a contributing member of
any team on which you’ve
agreed to serve or work.

NO RULE 56

that says you can do
whatever you want
to do whenever you
feel like doing it.

Be dependable. Be
accountable. Never abuse
your power or position.

NO RULE 57

that says you can’t
show compassion
to others.

Be caring. People don’t care
how much you know until
they know how much you
care.

NO RULE 58

that says you don’t
need to use tact.

Speak to others honestly but
without being hurtful or
causing embarrassment.
Tactful communication
supports building
relationships. Building
relationships is an important
part of leadership.

Be tactful.

NO RULE 59

that says you
shouldn’t help solve
problems.

Be a problem-solver rather
than a problem-maker.
Encourage others to be
persistent in searching for
solutions. Help others see
that there’s always another
move, that things are always
“figureoutable.” Be a part of
the solution.

NO RULE 60

that says you don’t
have to do what
you say you’re
going to do.

Be reliable. Do what you say
you are going to do at the
time you say you are going
to do it. If you say you will
have your part done by such-
and-such day, then by golly,
have it done!

NO RULE 61

that says you get to
skip the tough talks.

Have courageous
conversations and tough
talks with others. You might
have to practice ahead of
time, but it’ll be worth it.
Good leaders address tough
issues head-on.

NO RULE 62

that says someone
has to get you
started with your
work every day.

Leaders don’t need to be
told what to do or when to
do it. Others will be looking
for your initiative, your self-
motivation. No one should
have to give you a kick in the
butt or tell you what needs
to be done. Show initiative.

NO RULE 63

that says you

cannot be

adaptable.

It is more than okay to
change course when new
data or information calls for
it. Embrace change. Don’t
run from it.

Be adaptable.

NO RULE 64

that says you don’t
have to know your
craft.

A good leader is competent
and knows his or her craft.
Continue learning as you
lead to build your
knowledge, skills, and
expertise.

NO RULE 65

that says you

should look for the

bad in others.

You will always find what you
are looking for. Rather than
seek out the bad, look for
the good in others.

NO RULE 66

that says you
should keep the
good deeds of
others a secret.

Highlight the good work of
your team members. Provide
opportunities for others to
“show their stuff.” Reward
individual accomplishments.
Be a good leader and share
the glory. Give up the
names.

NO RULE 67

that says it’s okay to
lie.

Be honest. Do not lie, cheat,
or steal. Ever.

NO RULE 68

that says you don’t
need to plan.

Be a strategic thinker and
planner. Be able to look at
where you are now and
determine what needs to be
done next, and into the
future, to move the
organization forward.

NO RULE 69

that says you don’t
need to be good at
math.

As a leader, you need to
have some basic math skills
to understand the finances.
If you’re not already
competent in math, then
learn. If this is hard for you,
then work at it. You must be
able to comprehend the flow
of money into and out of
your organization.

NO RULE 70

that says you don’t

need to work in

your community.

Get out there and be
involved in your community.
It’s not giving back – it’s
giving. Be the face of your
organization in the
community. A caring leader
represents caring people.
Caring people represent a
caring organization. People
are your organization.

NO RULE 71

that says it’s not
okay to fail.

Having a failure doesn’t
mean being a failure.
Failures are opportunities to
learn, so when you fail, and
we all do, rebound. To make
sure the failure is a learning
experience, think about
what needs to be done
differently the next time,
and adapt.

Be okay with failure.

NO RULE 72

that says you don’t
need to know your
data.

You have to know data in
order to know answers.
Leaders are skilled at
collecting, organizing, and
analyzing data to make the
best decisions. Know data.
Know answers.

NO RULE 73

that says you don’t
need a mind-body
connection.

Leaders need endurance—
mental and physical stamina
are necessary to thrive.
Leadership roles rock around
the clock, so take time every
day to reset your mind-body
connection.

Take care of yourself.

NO RULE 74

that says not to
worry about the
influence you have
on others.

Be a positive influence for
things that matter. Your
influence can make a
difference, so use it to better
the lives of others – if even
in some small way.

NO RULE 75

that says don’t
commit.

Be a strong leader and make
commitments to your team,
your goals…whatever it is
you want to improve.
Do your job, plus! Pitch in
when needed to show
others there’s no job too
large or small.

Be committed to yourself,
too.

NO RULE 76

that says to keep
your expectations
low.

Set your own bar high.
Whatever work you do,
make sure it is of the highest
quality. You are a role model
and others will see the work
you produce. Produce work
that is worthy of your
signature – and worthy of
the organization you
represent.

NO RULE 77

that says you can’t.

If you think you can, you can.

Henry Ford thought he
could. And boy, could he!

Think you can. Know you
can.

NO RULE 78

that says you don’t
have to be smart.

Get smart. Then get smarter.
And then get even smarter.
It’s not just about being
book wise; it’s also about
gaining the knowledge
needed to do your job.

NO RULE 79

that says you can go
off course when
things get difficult.

As the leader, you need to be
the “Steady Eddie”—the one
who helps keep things
consistent and on an even
keel. Keep steady and stay
on course when things get
difficult.

NO RULE 80

that says you don’t
have to show
gratitude.

Showing gratitude keeps you
grounded and balanced and
fills others with the
goodness that comes from
your heart.

Each day, think of the things
that made your day
meaningful and show
gratitude.

Part Two

Leadership Skill-builders

Leadership LSB
Skill-builder
1
Assess yourself. Which NO RULES
have you already mastered?
Which NO RULES would you like
to work on next? Which NO
RULES will you work on this
week?...this month?...this year?

All of the NO RULES are listed on
the next page. Circle or make a
check next to those you’ve
mastered.

Which NO RULES have I already mastered?

1. Develop yourself into a terrific leader. 41. Have a friend and be a friend.
2. Lead by example. 42. Believe in yourself.
3. Make good decisions. 43. Be credible.
4. Make decisions quickly. 44. Bring your values to work.
5. Let your traits shine. 45. Build a strong team.
6. Let people do their jobs; don’t 46. Hold frequent conversations.
47. Use critical thinking skills.
micromanage. 48. Build trust.
7. Encourage those who think differently. 49. Take risks.
8. Make and keep traditions. 50. Be hopeful.
9. Some people won’t like you. That’s 51. Listen.
52. Go first when things are scary.
okay. 53. Compose handwritten notes.
10. Lay the groundwork. 54. Be clear. Say what you mean and mean
11. Do something different when things
what you say.
aren’t working. 55. Be a contributing team member
12. Use your leader voice when dealing 56. Be dependable.
57. Be caring.
with others. 58. Be tactful.
13. Use good manners with everyone. 59. Be a problem-solver.
14. Think and dream big. 60. Be reliable.
15. Admit to mistakes. 61. Have tough talks.
16. Earn respect. 62. Show initiative.
17. Be the tone-setter. 63. Be adaptable.
18. Listen. 64. Know your craft.
19. Do the right thing. 65. Look for the good in others.
20. Be passionate. 66. Provide opportunities for others to
21. Focus on what matters.
22. Give credit to others. show their stuff.
23. Seek others for counsel and advice. 67. Be honest.
24. Share the vision. 68. Be a strategic planner.
25. Be authentic. 69. Watch the finances.
26. It’s about everyone. 70. Be involved in the community.
27. Learn constantly. 71. Be okay with failure.
28. Communicate effectively in a variety of 72. Know your data.
73. Take care of yourself.
ways. 74. Be a positive influence for things that
29. Follow the law.
30. Follow the Golden Rule. matter.
31. Plan for results. 75. Make commitments.
32. Be authentic. Be your own type of 76. Set your bar high.
77. Think you can.
leader. 78. Get smart. And then get smarter.
33. Build your skills. 79. Be the steady Eddie.
34. Pay attention to details. 80. Show gratitude.
35. Give some. Get some.
36. Ask quality questions.
37. Expect the best from others.
38. Build relationships.
39. Be respectful of others.
40. Monitor what is important.

Leadership LSB
Skill-builder
2
Focus on one NO RULE to learn
and practice every week or month.
One way to do this is by using a list
of Leadership Look Fors for each
skill you want to improve. “What
the heck is a Look For?” you ask.
A Look For is a list of the
knowledge, skills, or traits that
display a particular leadership skill.

Leadership Look Fors

Developing yourself as a leader is an inside job. It’s about thinking through what kind
of leader you want to be and then figuring out how to grow into that picture of
yourself. I want to give you a practical tool for doing this—Leadership Look Fors!

A Look For is a piece of evidence that something is in place. The Look For technique
works exceptionally well because it requires self-reflection and self-feedback. Let’s
say that as a leader, you want to work on respect.

Here’s what you do: Take one sheet of plain paper. Grab a pen. Title this sheet of
paper, Leadership Look Fors. Under that, write the leadership area you want to work
on (as in the example, Respect). Now, think about what it means to exhibit respect. If
you were looking for respect in a leader, what evidence would you see? What does it
look like? How do you know it when you see it? What would people see you doing or
saying or even wearing if you were demonstrating the trait of respect?

Brainstorm and write your list of Look Fors.
This list then becomes your guide for
developing respect in yourself.

Practice your list of Look Fors in whatever way
makes sense for you. You might start with one
item or a couple, practice for a couple of
weeks, and then move on to another item.
Remember that developing new skills takes
practice, so you’ll have to remind yourself to
practice the items on your list. Make notes on
your daily calendar or to-do list, and practice
every chance you get.

Leadership Look Fors

Respect

• Stand up and shake hands when I meet someone new.
• Look people in the eyes when I am talking with them.
• Give my full attention to whomever I am speaking—no glancing at my

iPhone, computer screen, or tablet during conversations or meetings.
• Give suggestions in a positive way. Instead of saying, “That’s a stupid idea,”

I can say something like, “That’s another way to look at it. What if we added
this?”
• Give someone who is angry the space he or she may need.
• Show a genuine interest in others.
• Learn and use the names of people I come in contact with, even if they don’t
work in my organization.
• Build other people up; be aware that my words can tear others down if I’m
not careful.
• Make new people at work feel welcome.
• Dress appropriately for work and church.
• Put myself in their shoes; think about the feelings of others before I make
judgements.
• Ask for others’ points-of-view.
• Acknowledge the presence of others.
• Be on time.
• Treat people the same no matter their age, race/ethnicity, disability status,
weight, gender, etc.

Leadership LSB
Skill-builder
3
Leaders can set an example of
the value of continued learning.
Helping others become leaders is
worth your time.

Being aware of the NO RULES is a
first step.

One of the things you can do is to
share a NO RULE with your staff
members and have a discussion
about how the NO RULE applies
in your workplace.

Sharing a NO RULE With Staff

During this quick discussion, connect a NO RULE of choice to the organization’s
vision and mission. As the leader, you want to help your staff members grow, and
you want simple ways to keep the vision and mission in front of everyone.

1. Choose a NO RULE that you’d like to reinforce with your staff. This may be a
NO RULE you are working on yourself, or a NO RULE that you’ve already
mastered but recognize as an area in need of improvement among
members of your team.

2. Review your mission statement. For this example, I’m going to use the
mission statement from the great organization the USO: USO lifts the spirits
of America’s troops and their families.

3. Now, go through the NO RULES and choose a few that support the mission.
Examples of NO RULES that support the USO’s mission include Respect
(#39), Lead by Example (#2), Don’t Micromanage (#6), Keep Your Word (#60,
#67), Listen(#18), and Communication (#28).

4. Choose one of the NO RULES for further investigation, such as NO RULE #28,
Communicate Effectively. When one of our service members enters our
facility at an airport, what do we do through communications skills that
supports lifting the spirits of America’s troops and their families? The
quickest way to think through this is to make a list of Look Fors:
• Acknowledge the service member as soon as he or she enters the
Center.
• Smile.
• Let the service member know you are there if there is anything he or
she needs.
• Use appropriate protocols for rank.
• Recognize spouse and children. (USO is about spirits of troops and
families.)
• Give a thank-you for your service with 2 bumps to the heart.
• Listen.

5. You’ve thought through the mission statement and some of the Look Fors
for the Communication Skills you want to reinforce. You now have the
content you need to work with your staff. You can use the information in a
quick brainstorming session in which you let staff come up with the Look
Fors. You can also use the Look Fors to set clear expectations and use
examples specific to your organization.

Leadership LSB
Skill-builder
4
If you teach a course in
leadership of any type, include
NO RULES as a part of your
course.

The book is a quick read and
leaves plenty of time for
discussion.

Have the discussions.

Leadership LSB
Skill-builder
5
Go through your organization’s
policy manual or handbook.
Where do you find evidence of
the NO RULES?

As a leader, you should look for
connections between the things
you read and your organization.
Leaders are responsible for the
implementation of policy. Thus,
NO RULES and your policies and
procedures manual are very good
places to make connections.

See an example of how to do this
on the next page.

Which NO RULES are embedded
in policy?

NO RULE # 29 FOLLOW THE LAW
NO RULE # 44 VALUES (Honest)
NO RULE # 67 HONESTY

Leadership LSB
Skill-builder
6
Think about it: Which individuals
in your organization are good
examples of NO RULES leaders?
How do you know?

Have your team members each
think of a person in your
organization whom they consider
to be a good leader. Then have
them write down the evidence
that the selected person is a
good leader. Examine the list of
traits. Which of the NO RULES
does the selected person
demonstrate?

My “Good Leader” Example:

1. Develop yourself into a terrific leader. 41. Have a friend and be a friend.
2. Lead by example. 42. Believe in yourself.
3. Make good decisions. 43. Be credible.
4. Make decisions quickly. 44. Bring your values to work.
5. Let your traits shine. 45. Build a strong team.
6. Let people do their jobs; don’t 46. Hold frequent conversations.
47. Use critical thinking skills.
micromanage. 48. Build trust.
7. Encourage those who think differently. 49. Take risks.
8. Make and keep traditions. 50. Be hopeful.
9. Some people won’t like you. That’s 51. Listen.
52. Go first when things are scary.
okay. 53. Compose handwritten notes.
10. Lay the groundwork. 54. Be clear. Say what you mean and mean
11. Do something different when things
what you say.
aren’t working. 55. Be a contributing team member
12. Use your leader voice when dealing 56. Be dependable.
57. Be caring.
with others. 58. Be tactful.
13. Use good manners with everyone. 59. Be a problem-solver.
14. Think and dream big. 60. Be reliable.
15. Admit to mistakes. 61. Have tough talks.
16. Earn respect. 62. Show initiative.
17. Be the tone-setter. 63. Be adaptable.
18. Listen. 64. Know your craft.
19. Do the right thing. 65. Look for the good in others.
20. Be passionate. 66. Provide opportunities for others to
21. Focus on what matters.
22. Give credit to others. show their stuff.
23. Seek others for counsel and advice. 67. Be honest.
24. Share the vision. 68. Be a strategic planner.
25. Be authentic. 69. Watch the finances.
26. It’s about everyone. 70. Be involved in the community.
27. Learn constantly. 71. Be okay with failure.
28. Communicate effectively in a variety of 72. Know your data.
73. Take care of yourself.
ways. 74. Be a positive influence for things that
29. Follow the law.
30. Follow the Golden Rule. matter.
31. Plan for results. 75. Make commitments.
32. Be authentic. Be your own type of 76. Set your bar high.
77. Think you can.
leader. 78. Get smart. And then get smarter.
33. Build your skills. 79. Be the steady Eddie.
34. Pay attention to details. 80. Show gratitude.
35. Give some. Get some.
36. Ask quality questions.
37. Expect the best from others.
38. Build relationships.
39. Be respectful of others.
40. Monitor what is important.

Leadership LSB
Skill-builder
7
With which NO RULE do you
disagree? (By the way, it’s okay to
disagree.)

Discuss your thinking with a
trusted colleague.