138 I vividly recall returning home from work that day, and as I walked through the door, LaShawn handed me my mail. Grasping my book bag, I prepared to head to the library, a routine I faithfully followed three days a week. The quiet room within the library became my closest companion, offering solace and focus. As I opened the letter mentioned above, its contents struck me like a blow, causing my motivation to plummet. My anxiety surged, eventually leading to a panic attack. A fellow student in the quiet room noticed my distress and approached me, kindly inquiring about my well-being. Having already been expelled from two graduate programs due to my poor performance, this distressing pattern seemed to persist. Determined to change the course of my academic journey, I took a week off from work and immersed myself in the library, diligently catching up on the assignments I had fallen behind on. This dedicated effort paid off as I successfully emerged from probation the following semester. Academic Probation
139 Master of Management Program Completion
140 Master of Management Degree ’
141 Master of Management Transcript
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143 Mom, I Have Another Surprise for You I yearned to find a new way to express my deep love for my mother. It has become a customary tradition, defaulting to the timeless tunes of B.B. King. "Momma, guess what?" I eagerly exclaimed, brimming with excitement. "I am receiving yet another award from the school, and I want you to be there to witness it. I'll fly you to Baltimore in two weeks before the ceremony commences." Knowing that my mother had a lifelong friend she always visited during her trips to Baltimore, I decided against attending the show this time, concerned about her worrying about my well-being. Instead, I purchased two tickets to Pier-Six, the venue where the concert was held. I could hardly contain my anticipation, envisioning the surprise on her face as she opened the envelope, initially expecting to find an award I had received.
144 Graduation Day I was filled with excitement as my family traveled all the way from Florida to witness my graduation. This particular ceremony brought together students receiving their bachelor’s degrees as well. However, there was a surprise. Among us was a woman who for some reason didn't travel to North Carolina to participate in her Ph.D. graduation. Instead, she walked in our ceremony. As she stepped onto the stage, the entire building erupted in thunderous applause. At that moment, while clapping alongside the crowd, I made a silent promise to myself that I would attain my Ph.D. degree for Susan. After the ceremony, a lively party awaited me at my sister's house. I felt an immense sense of accomplishment as if I were the President on that glorious day. Being the first in my family to achieve a master’s degree filled me with immense pride. Interestingly, the regalia we received impressed me even more than the degree itself—particularly the cap and gown. The graduate gowns exuded a distinguished aura that set them apart from their undergraduate counterparts.
145 CHAPTER THIRTEEN Doctoral. Program Myth 9 Learning disabilities are only academic in nature. They do not affect other areas of a person’s life (Sharma, 2021). Reality. Some people with learning disabilities have isolated difficulties in reading, writing, or mathematics. However, most people with learning disabilities have more than one area of difficulty. Dr. Larry Silver asserts that “learning disabilities are life disabilities (Sharma, 2021).”
146 School of Advanced Studies DOCTOR OF MANAGEMENT SPECIALIZATION ORGANIZATIONAL LEADERSHIP
147 School of Advanced Studies Admissions Having applied for the Ph.D. program with little hope of acceptance due to its highly competitive nature, receiving the acceptance letter left me in disbelief. I must have read it about a dozen times, seeking validation. Curiously, I asked my fiancé to read it as well to ensure I wasn't mistaken. With a smile, she confirmed, "You've been accepted into the U of P Ph.D. program." Still, in disbelief, I wasn't satisfied with just her confirmation. I quickly captured a picture of the letter and sent it to my Supervisor, Mark Hooper from the Mayor’s Office of Employment Development, seeking his input. Shortly after, he called me back, congratulating me and affirming that it was a remarkable achievement. Eager to share the incredible news, I called my mother. However, her response was a surprise. "You just graduated two months ago," she remarked, "and now another school? How many more degrees are you planning to pursue?" Chuckling, I reassured her that this would be the final one, explaining that I couldn't pursue any more degrees beyond this point; there simply wasn't any more to obtain. Ma, this one is for Susan.
148 Our first assignment was to compose a letter of intent during our orientation. This personal declaration would serve as a source of motivation whenever we encountered frustration or felt demotivated during the program. The facilitators explained that we should revisit and read this letter whenever such moments arose. As I faced periods of depression, low self-esteem, and a sense of loneliness, due to the absence of fellow students in my program within my state for collaborative work, I found solace in reading this letter. My classes were online, so I lacked a physical campus to visit to study or complete assignments. In those challenging times, I turned to the letter, finding the need to read it over twenty times throughout the program, seeking strength and renewed determination to persevere. Letter of Intent
149 For a student to be a doctoral candidate, they must have completed all their coursework in the program. The remaining courses allow one-on-one meeting time with their dissertation committee, allowing them to receive guidance and support for completing their dissertation. I received an email informing me of my progress and eligibility as a doctoral candidate, I was excited. It felt as though I had already crossed the finish line and graduated. Fueled by this accomplishment, I began signing documents. My name is with the title, proudly displaying my achievement in the paperwork and Curious about this change, my supervisor questioned me about the inclusion of the title on my paperwork. In response, I explained that my school counselor had advised me to do so, as I had successfully completed all my required coursework. It was an expression of my milestones and progress within the program. (c) Doctoral Candidate Status Approved
150 As students, we were responsible for assembling a Dissertation Committee that would provide essential guidance throughout the completion of our dissertation. This committee comprised a chairperson and two committee members who supported the Chair. The Chairperson held the final decision making authority throughout the process, and their role was crucial. The school maintained a comprehensive database of experts specializing in various research designs to ensure a well-rounded and knowledgeable committee. It is imperative that we select a dissertation team that possesses expertise aligned with our specific research design. If at any point we feel that a committee member is not actively contributing to the team, we have the option to terminate their involvement. The letter mentioned above is an example of how committee members responded to the advertisements placed Search for Dissertation Committee Dissertation Chair Committee Member Committee Member
151 by students in the database, attracting potential committee members who were interested in and suited for the research project.
152 I was taken aback by the realization that, as students, we were responsible for assembling a Dissertation Committee that would provide essential guidance throughout the completion of our dissertation. This committee comprised a chairperson and two committee members who supported the Chair. The Chairperson held the final decision-making authority throughout the process, The school maintained a comprehensive database of experts specializing in various research designs to ensure a well-rounded and knowledgeable committee. It is imperative that we select a dissertation team that possesses expertise aligned with our specific research design. If at any point we feel that a committee member is not actively contributing to the team, we have the option to terminate their involvement. The letter mentioned above is an example of how committee members responded to the advertisements placed by students in the database, attracting potential committee members who were interested in the research project. First Dissertation Challenges Q Q Q
153 First Dissertation Proposal Failed PERSONAL PERCEPTION AND EXPERIENCE OF MINORITY BUSINESSES WITHIN MARYLAND’S PROCUREMENT PROCESS By Raymond Holmes University of Phoenix PROCESS... Money Down the Drain I spent over $800 for the edits only for the editor to tell me that I wrote an owner’s manual on doing a dissertation as opposed to research. I had
154 First Chairperson Terminated The editor I consulted advised me to consider replacing my chairperson due to the unprecedented nature of the proposal I had submitted. While reaching out to participants for my study, I proceeded with a proposal that had not yet received approval from the review board. Considering this recommendation, I decided to change my dissertation topic as suggested, and my chairperson acknowledged the editor's assessment. This revelation left me feeling furious and disappointed. The comments provided above are from my first Chairperson regarding my second attempt at the dissertation. Having completed five chapters for my second dissertation, I took the difficult decision to terminate my association with the Dissertation Chair. It was disheartening to realize that I had invested a year with this Chairperson, only to find myself with nothing substantial to show for my efforts. Second Dissertation Challenges
155 Second Dissertation Proposal Failed THE PERCEPTIONS OF MARYLAND’S MINORITY AND WOMEN'S OWNED BUSINESSES BURDEN OF PROOF AS A VICTIM OF DISCRIMINATION By Raymond Holmes University of Phoenix April 20 Second Chairperson Hired PROCESS... My second Chairperson had a conflict with the previous Chairperson's handling of my dissertation. Recognizing the need for the Chairperson's handling of my dissertation. Recognizing the need to address this situation, she took the time to educate me on the proper process of completing a dissertation. During our discussions, she informed me that the second dissertation I had initiated would not contribute any valuable insights to the research. Her guidance was invaluable, as she provided me with a deeper understanding of the dissertation process and the importance of conducting meaningful research. I appreciate her expertise and the clarity she brought to the situation.
156 Third Dissertation Proposal Attempt WORK PARTICIPATION SPECIALISTS’ EXPERIENCE OF BARRIERS TO CUSTOMER SERVICES ON PHYSIOLOGICAL FUNCTIONING, SOCIAL SERVICES DEPARTMENT Back to the Drawing Board After facing setbacks with my previous dissertation topics, I found myself back at the drawing board for the third time. It took me approximately one month to finally develop a research topic that both my Chairperson and I were satisfied with. One of the challenges I encountered was my inclination to include abundant data to address every question the readers might have. However, my chairperson explained that my primary task was to demonstrate my competence in conducting scholarly research. She advised me to focus on displaying my research skills in this dissertation and suggested that if I wished to expand my study, I can consider doing so once this dissertation is approved. I was relieved when my chairperson approved my third dissertation topic, marking a positive step forward in my academic journey.
157 First Submission of Quality Review Failed
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159 PROCESS... During the orientation for the program, we were informed about the challenges that many students face with their dissertation proposals. The facilitators shared stories about the high rate of rejections from the Quality Review Board (QRB), stating that over 80% of submissions fail due to the rigorous requirements set by the panel. One facilitator even mentioned that winning the lottery seemed easier than having a proposal accepted on the first in my case, it took four attempts before my proposal finally passed the review process. After ensuring that the correct forms were included and addressing any previous shortcomings, I resubmitted the proposal, which was then approved. However, I understood this was only the beginning of a challenging journey in the next phase of the process. Second Submission of Quality Review Passed
160 I’m Dropping Out of the Doctoral Program Finding an organization that would allow me to conduct interviews for my dissertation was one of the most disappointing challenges I encountered. I couldn't move forward with my research process without securing an organization's cooperation. Despite acknowledging my talent and creativity, even my current employer declined to be a part of my study, adding to the disappointment. Numerous organizations turned me down, and I sometimes felt like giving up. However, I made a final attempt by contacting a prominent government agency in Maryland. After explaining the purpose of my study, the chief of staff, who didn't possess a Ph.D., expressed his admiration for my goals. He couldn't fathom why anyone would refuse to assist someone in achieving such an important milestone. Permission to Use Premises
161 In a heartfelt moment, he signed my paperwork and granted me full access to conduct my study within the state government agency. Overwhelmed with gratitude, I couldn’t hold back my tears of joy. After three months of rejections, I was finally on my way to start my research.
162 Internal Review Board Failed Second Dissertation Chair Terminated Committee Member Resigned As I mentioned earlier, the two committee members play a supportive role to the Chair. They independently review my work and provide recommendations for changes. Unfortunately, a conflict arose between my chairperson and one of the committee members regarding comments from the IRB and the reasons for rejecting my proposal. The conflict escalated into an exchange of emails, with both parties having valid points. Eventually, my chairperson exercised their authority over the committee members, leading to their resignation. Despite my pleas, I couldn't convince the committee members to reconsider. Due to medical issues concerning my mom, I had to postpone the next course with my Chair. This decision upset her, and she expressed her unwillingness to provide further assistance. I and had no choice but to terminate her.
163 Ph.D. Program Time Expired I made the necessary changes as required by the IRB, but I faced a hurdle in resubmitting the proposal without a chairperson. To address this, I placed an advertisement seeking a new Committee Chair. Most Dissertation Chairs do not like to accept candidates after their proposal is approved. I searched for a chairperson for over one month. My anxiety level had increased. Furthermore, I received a letter from the college notifying me that my allotted time to complete the program would expire in two months. I am ready to drop out of the Ph.D. program. I opened my email to send my academic advisor an email on my decision and saw the email (above). I reached out to Dr. Henry and expressed my frustration about the possibility of Reg ina Henry, MBA, MEd, EdD Welcoming of New Chair ---------- Forwarded message ---------- From: <[email protected]> Date: Sat, Aug 11, 6:36 PM Subject: Request for Mentoring To: [email protected] Greetings RAYMOND HOLMES, This is an automated message from the University of Phoenix School of Advanced Studies. Please do not reply to this message. REGINA HENRY has accepted your request for mentorship. Please login to SASWeb to verify that this faculty member is listed as your mentor. Please make sure that you maintain ongoing communication with your mentor in regards to your dissertation status and any schedule changes that occur during your program. This Email is only intended for Email Address: [email protected]
164 being dismissed from the program. Considering how far I had come, Dr. Henry reassured me that I wouldn't be dismissed from the program. 80% My dissertation and oral defense were approved by October 20xx. Due to medical setbacks and personal family issues with my mom’s health, most of my time was consumed traveling to Florida. In addition, I was working on finding another Dissertation Chair and had further delayed my completion date. About 80% of my dissertation was completed when Dr. Henry came on board. Two weeks later, we filed for an appeal to continue the Doctorial Program. On my mother’s birthday, I submitted a letter to my Academic Advisor requesting a program extension. Program Extension Letter Submitted
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166 The significance of this day was that it fell just one day before my mother's birthday. Dr. Henry, understanding the urgency of my situation, kindly write a letter of support for me to continue the program. She provided valuable suggestions on creating a project management plan that would outline a timeline for the completion of my dissertation. This plan would be submitted to the Dean's office, pending approval, demonstrating my commitment to finishing the program within the extended year. Letter of Support from My New Chair
167 Program Extension Requirements I had to undergo the daunting process of applying for a program extension, along with a detailed matrix outlining my plan to complete the program within one year. This process induced significant stress and resulted in numerous panic attacks. Fearful of the worst-case scenario, the thought of being rejected from continuing the absence of a Dissertation Chairperson added to the stress, intensifying the situation. Consequently, I faced the difficult decision of terminating my relationship with my previous Chair, as our meeting schedule had been reduced, exacerbating the challenges I faced.
168 On September, I received a letter from the Dean's office, bringing the long-awaited news that my program extension had been approved. I sat on my bed for days, anxiously awaiting the outcome, my fingers crossed in hopeful anticipation. Despite having accomplished a great deal, there was always a lingering sense of readiness to accept defeat and surrender if my request was denied. - Program Extension Approved
169 IRB Correct a Thon PROCESS... Once I received the feedback for this proposal, I was astounded to find 174 problems that required correction. I vividly remember receiving the email on a Thursday night, prompting me to take a day off from work on Friday and initiating a correct A Thon for the entire weekend. As I immersed myself in the task, I was so engrossed in the work that I was asked to leave both the county library and the University of Baltimore library, which closed at 2:00 am. Undeterred, I sought refuge at an IHOP around 2:30 am, securing a booth with access to a power outlet. I ordered food and tirelessly worked until the sun began to rise. Throughout the night, Despite my anxiety attacks and frustration, I vowed to complete the correction marathon, I addressed all the identified issues and successfully completed the corrections by Sunday night. Second Internal Review Process Failed
170 I opened this email and was disappointed after seeing the word “Deferred.” I did not know the meaning of deferred, because of all my other failures. I assumed that it was a dreadful thing, so I panicked with anxiety. Dr. Henry called me and congratulated me. I asked her “what was she talking about?” She stated that my dissertation had advanced to the Dean’s office for final review and approval. I immediately felt the excitement. It seemed as if I was undergoing a rigorous examination, akin to a utility test for a law enforcement agency, as I navigated through the dissertation judges while addressing the identified issues. Each time I thought I had made all the necessary corrections; another judge would return it with additional revisions required. This back-and-forth process persisted for about four attempts before I finally succeeded in passing this crucial second phase of the dissertation process. The Internal Review Board Process Deferred
171 I was at work when my Chair called me, asking if I had read my emails. I replied that I hadn't yet and inquired if something was wrong. To my relief, she responded, "No, actually, it's good news. You are one step closer to the Dean's approval." Once I arrived home around 8:30 pm, I eagerly opened the email. I read and reread it about 15 times to ensure I understood its contents correctly. Unable to contain my excitement, I called my hair at 9:30 pm; unintentionally waking her up, to confirm if the email was legit. She assured me, “Yes, Mr. Holmes, work on those edits and submit them back within three days.” I stayed up all night diligently, making the necessary corrections. By 7:00 am, I had completed the task and promptly submitted my revised dissertation to my Chair by 8:00 am. Around 5:00 pm, she called me and humorously asked if I ever slept, commending me as one of her hardest working mentees.
172 Dean’s Office Approval
173 Oral Defense After receiving approval from the Dean's Office for my dissertation, the oral defense was the next crucial step. I dedicated over two hours to rehearsing my notes for the defense. It felt as though my entire life was at stake. The fear of putting in so much effort only to fail at this final stage weighed heavily on my mind, resulting in tremendous stress. I had invited my family and friends to join the conference call, and I felt particularly concerned about my three mentees, whom I had been guiding through their dissertations. I wanted them to witness the process they would have to complete.
174 The Shocking Phone Call While enjoying a game of spades with my siblings on a Saturday night around 9:00pm, my Dissertation Chair unexpectedly called me. I created a transcript capturing the conversation and the background scene during the call to provide a vivid account of the situation. RING, RING: I answered my phone. “Holmes” Dr. Henry: Is this Dr. Raymond Holmes? Me: I paused and said, “Who is this (with noise in the background of my siblings yelling “It’s your turn Raymond, play your hand boy”? Dr. Henry: “This is your Chair, Dr. Regina Henry. Congratulations Doctor, you are now officially Dr. Raymond Holmes. Me: Are you serious? You are playing, right? Dr. Henry: No, I’m not. I got an email from the dean’s office. right here. Me: I yelled out to my siblings “A y’all I just got my Ph.D. D! Neicy (sister): Uttered “Boy, whatever. Play your hand…” Neicy: she paused and looked at me and asked, “Did you say what I think you said?” Me: My chairperson is on the phone right now; she said I got my Ph.D! Neicy: Hey y’all, our little brother just got his Ph.D.! Dr. Henry: Well, I am going to talk to you tomorrow, Dr. Holmes. I’ll send you the email. Siblings: Started shouting their congratulations to me, hugging and kissing me (eww). Dr. Regina Henry Neicy
175 CHAPTER FOURTEEN I am an Author “Competence goes beyond words." It’s the leader’s ability to say it, plan it, and do. it in such a way that others know that you know how— and know that they want to follow you.” ~ John C. Maxwell
176 Approved Dissertation
177 The smiles kept coming. It seemed like a fairy tale. I received my published dissertation in the mail. I unpacked my book and stirred at it for about five minutes. I was flipping through the book to verify if it was really mine. I even took books off the shelf to compare the formatting for consistency. It was defiantly real. I even returned about five hours later and repeated the investigation of the book again.
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182 Saying I Do to Your Career My Second Publication My ultimate aspiration was to become a professor, and I understood most universities required their professors to have published scholarly articles or books in their field. Given my expertise in workforce development, I set a goal to self-publish a textbook. This book was carefully crafted to provide job seekers with valuable insights, best practices, and practical tips for securing employment. This includes a wealth of resources and recommendations from experts in the field of workforce development. What sets this book apart is the thoughtfully designed assignments presented at the end of each chapter. These assignments offer readers the opportunity to apply their knowledge, practice critical skills, and showcase their understanding of the subject matter.
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185 Future Publication Front Back Help Wanted This book promises to be intriguing, especially for individuals in leadership positions, including those in human resources. It will undoubtedly captivate those who are already familiar with my character and experiences. The primary objective of this book is to provide managers with valuable insights and best practices for effectively managing a diverse workforce. While diversity is often associated with race, it encompasses factors such as age and gender, which are external characteristics. Drawing from my own
186 employment history as a point of reference, I will candidly share untapped skills and abilities. CHAPTER FIFTEEN The Degree Is in the Mail “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.” ~ John C. Maxwell
187 Please do not respond to this auto-generated email. Hello Raymond Holmes, Congratulations on completing your program with the University of Phoenix and reaching an important educational milestone! This is a courtesy email to inform you that your diploma/certificate has just shipped. Your tracking number is: Tracking Number: 1Z6W3A59YN41652097 Delivery times vary based on destination. Please allow a minimum of 14 days for the delivery of your diploma/certificate. (Non-Rush shipments). If you have any questions please contact the Admissions and Records Service Center at Thank you, Office of the Registrar Click here Join the Alumni Association today! Click here University of Phoenix 4025 S. Riverpoint Parkway Phoenix, AZ 85040 1- 800-866-3919 I had the school send a copy of my doctorate to my mother through Fed-Ex. She called me and started shouting “My son is a Damn doctor! Is this for real son?” and started laughing with excitement. She said, “I am so proud of you." I knew you could do it.” She said, “I always told you, do not listen to what people say about you." You were bad as hell, but I knew you could do it.” I said, “No ma, we did it.” She said, “NO, you did it." I never had that kind of education.” I said, “Well we got it now.” “You are the first Doctor in the family. She said, “And one of my children did it first.” That statement was meant to be directed at my aunts who called my mother the thrift store mother and labeled me as a bad kid because I stayed in trouble. I had flashbacks of my hospitalizations as a child playing Connect Four with nurses and patients. Similar to the anxiety I felt when my mother left the hospital because visiting hours were over. I felt that same feeling when she was not there when I turned around to see her.