BBC Top Gear - 01 March 2022

The car’s a hoot, but he’s
mainly smiling over how

many logos are in shot

Yes, £290k is a lot, but can
you put a price on leather
wrapped bumpers?

A padded wine rack.
The only optional extra
Porsche never thought of

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 101

KALMAR AUTOMOTIVE

Optional petrol cans
and spare tyre ideal
for starting a small riot

body or the addictive short throw 5001... what makes Kalmar think there’s Porsche owners. An elderly Australian
H-pattern gearchange with red anodised room for his Scandinavian upstart to couple on their umpteenth visit. A German
lever – that defines the RS-R. Over the muscle in on the pork rush? car dealing magnate called Bruno. And,
same terrain our Toyota Corolla hire car holding court in the middle of the room,
rumbled across like a skateboard on crazy I squander an opportunity to pose the ‘Mr Le Mans’ himself. Who, I’m delighted
paving, this is phenomenally composed. awkward question. Jan’s phone rings. He’s to say, conforms exactly to my lifelong
What shocks has it got? “Something preoccupied with the imminent arrival of belief you should always meet your
expensive. Suspension is... my thing.” a VIP: Tom Kristensen himself has flown heroes. He’s friendly, knowledgeable,
in to have a go in his personal commission, and more than a tad embarrassed his ‘7-97’
The dampers on this example would and Jan’s off (sideways) in the CS-R to commission will be photographed wearing
set you back £21,000. Per corner. But they greet his business partner. slender WRC-spec spiked tyres, rather
allow extremely clever 911-aiding quirks. than its deep-dished road-spec Fuchs.
Kalmar has engineered in a surprising This leaves photographer Jonny and I
degree of dive under braking, to help that in the 12.30pm twilight with the prototype The numerical name? While Kristensen
unloaded nose turn in on a loose surface, RS-R. Rude not to, really. I might have is most associated with Audi Le Mans
but the travel then stiffens considerably for been more respectful if I’d known then dominance (taking seven wins between
stability, so the nose doesn’t bob or wander that it’s worth £292,000. Plus VAT. And a 2000 and 2013 in petrol and TDI-powered
as you gun it and ride out the drift. donor car. It’s -5˚C, but numbers like that efforts) his first victory at La Sarthe came
really make the blood run cold. in a Joest Racing Porsche prototype. Car 7.
“Speed isn’t really the point,” Jan The year was 1997. His stunning (if
argues. “My clients already have really fast Over lunch in the cosy cabin, Jonny gawkily underwheeled) 911 is a present to
cars. This is about giving them something thaws his cameras and I survey the his 29-year-old self achieving the Le Mans
analogue.” I’ll say. Half an hour sawing at clientele. A couple of LA hydrogen
the wheel, denting his perfectly manicured entrepreneurs – both of them serial
snowbanks and I’m knackered.
“HALF AN HOUR DENTING HIS
And still, if I may, a mite cynical. MANICURED SNOW BANKS
This build-your-dream 911 lark: hardly AND I’M KNACKERED”
a shortage of them, is there? Singer’s the
household name, but if you’re into the
subject you’ll know of Tuthill (a British
outfit that has long been setting up 911s
for road and no-roads), then there’s Theon,
RUF, Gunther Werks, Everrati, Workshop

102 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

Tom Kristensen: 40
per cent Kalmar
shareholder, 100

per cent test driver
extraordinaire

“Yes, you’re very handy
Mr Kristensen but our

snapper is now frostbitten”

dream. And you can have one too, for Even endurance racing’s most decorated car’s carbon footprint comes in its
£333,000. Plus tax. Plus donor car. legend is a big kid when he’s got rear-wheel manufacture. By rebuilding something old,
drive and an ice rink playground. you’re already being greener. Our car will
It runs a 3.8-litre air-cooled flat-six be the ‘cleanest’ new car to build, period.”
from a 996 GT3, with a bespoke intake and The 7-97 is an exquisitely desirable
ECU. Thanks to a carbon-fibre rebody, it object: the diminutive Sixties 911 look, the Client demand is already driving the
weighs under 1,200kg and on tarmac it’ll uprated mechanicals, the peace of mind, project. Kalmar’s still smarting from a
do 0–62mph in under 5secs. But it’s the the uniqueness. Is it, I finally put to Jan, recent deposit cancellation on green
details that delight: the plaid upholstery, a futureproof business? What’s going to guilt-trip grounds.
the unnumbered gearlever tailored to TK’s give Kalmar Automotive a vital USP?
reach, the Danish flag redline and Tom’s “A customer called me back regarding
signature etched onto the tacho. “To overtake your rivals, you cannot a 7-97 order and said ‘I cannot buy it.
walk in their footsteps,” he says, tacitly My daughters will not allow me to buy a
It’s a rolling laboratory testing adaptive referring to Singer and co. “If you follow, combustion car.’ That was the kick to form
suspension and electric power steering you’re never number one. Tom is a number Kalmar ‘Evergreen’ – plant-fibre bodies,
that only assists at low speed “because... one, a winner. So am I. alternative powertrains, and restored
my wife and daughter complained it was shinier-than-new parts.” I silently wonder
too hard to park,” Tom explains. “We need to look far ahead. Four years why US fuel cell magnates are also here...
ago when we started this, the environment
Still spilling humble apologies for the was not the big conversation it is now. It’s not the avenue I’d predicted
car’s knock-kneed stance and standard I don’t like electric cars, because I don’t from a boutique 911 outfit. Ecologically
racing driver excuses (“it’s got the wrong believe the way to save the planet is to dig responsible Porsches for collectors wary
steering rack in for ice driving”), he invites up minerals for batteries that are difficult of being disowned by the heirs to their
me for a couple of exploratory laps. Twenty to recycle, but I like their power and fortunes. “Sharing and upcycling can
minutes later, I have to tell him to stop efficiency.” I reason that the future for change the world. The best thing is, big car
because Jonny’s camera card is full and Kalmar will be plug-in EV restomods. manufacturers can’t do this. They can only
his toes are about to blacken and fall off. encourage you to buy something new.”
“Not just this. If customers say, ‘I
want a green car’, we can build this. We A roll caged 911 is the last place I
can replace a carbon-fibre body with a expected an eco ambush, but Jan has
plant-fibre body that has actually ‘eaten’ healthy orders to back up his convincing
CO2 during its life. It will weigh about pitch. He likes to quote Ferry Porsche’s
12kg more than a carbon body, but be famous line “the last car ever built will be
carbon positive, not even carbon neutral. a sports car”. If Jan’s plan works, the car
A restomod is already green – much of a in question might well be one of his own.

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 103

DAKAR DIARY

OUR
DAKAR
DIARY

104 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

We pay a visit to the Saudi
desert to ask: what exactly
does it take to organise and
observe the world’s most

brilliantly chaotic race?

WORDS OLLIE MARRIAGE
PHOTOGRAPHY MARK RICCIONI

You don’t exactly spectate at the Dakar. There are no marshals here. No boundaries
No. You drive to a point in the desert and either. Trucks, buggies, cars, quads, classics
you wait. And hope. Find somewhere high and and bikes all belting around a desert. Welcome
try to spot a dust cloud. Get excited and then to the Dakar Rally. The daftest, maddest,
realise you’ve been tracking a fast-moving wildest, most beautiful – and unpredictable
Land Cruiser. Again. – motorsport event on the planet.

But when they do come... boy oh boy, are And that’s not even the best bit. Because
you in for a treat. Because against a backdrop each night the race vehicles return to the
of sand and scrub comes a focal point of travelling circus that is the bivouac. The
wheeled fury. First a pinprick of colour, being pulsating heart of the race, home to 3,500
buffeted and pitched around, wheels loose in people for two weeks, a home that not only
the arches. Then the noise. High, savage and provides food, sleeping quarters, water,
thrashy denotes a Hilux, a muscular bellow electricity, communication, medical support,
for the V8 buggies, a steady nasal rasp for the waste disposal and satellite link-ups, but also
range extender in the electrically driven Audi. manages to pick itself up and move hundreds
of kilometres most nights.
They set off three minutes apart, so
provided they follow the same tracks you can It’s there, in the evening, chewing on dust,
work out where you need to be. Provided they lit by head torches, sparks and welding guns,
follow the same tracks. Sometimes you hear listening to stories from the day, looking at
but don’t see. Or watch as two competitors the staggering array of machinery (everything
merge from different directions. Or charge from a Citroen CX to a 10-tonne Kamaz truck)
towards one another. Now throw some camels that you realise Dakar is different. No, it’s not
into the mix. Watch in bemusement as a local as lawless and inhospitable as it used to be
in a pickup tries to join in. Then come the (just imagine...!), but this is racing at its
trucks. Stand. Well. Back. rawest, grittiest and toughest.

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 105

DAKAR DIARY HOW TO
SPECTATE
PUB AMMO
what actually happens: it gets busy in the
. accessible bits of the dunes and after
eye when and where about an hour of watching anyone who
has a car of their own begins to think
you can “there’s nothing stopping me having a
crack at this”. And 10 minutes later there
are cars doing donuts as trucks bear
down on them, pickups attempting to
race competitors, SUVs getting stuck,
revving engines, flying quads, family
picnics. In the dunes there are no rules.

106 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

ECO-FRIENDLY
FUTURE

Aramco one powered by hydrogen, but the most relevant
tech came from Audi’s RS Q e-tron. A Formula E motor on
each axle drawing power from a 50kWh battery pack,
which itself was topped up by a third motor powered by
a 2.0-litre turbocharged DTM engine acting as a range
extender. Audi saw its four stage wins (two of them by
Carlos Sainz, left) as cause for celebration, especially
as the car was around 150kg overweight.

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 107

DAKAR DIARY

THE JOY THAT PUB AMMO
IS DAKAR
CLASSIC This year’s route
was over 4,500 miles
Rover won the first
ever Dakar in 1979. The is done manually,
two-way DAF truck first no satnav
took part in 1984. Two
cabs because twin
engines. Behind that
rear clamshell of the
205 T16 lurks an old
Peugeot van. Only it’s
not, it’s a Mitsubishi
Pajero masquerading
as a 404.

108 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

THE MAN BEHIND
THE DAKAR

His job includes marshalling two ships, three planes, 15 helicopters,
100 trucks and 500 staff. That’s just what it takes to run the event.
Then there are the teams, media, sponsors etc. That’s another 3,000
people and 1,400 vehicles. There are 8,000 meals served a day, a
small town’s worth of equipment, all spread out over a festival site
that covers 50 acres. And it can pack up and go in about three hours.

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 109

PARTING
THE CAMELS

Yes, Kamaz swept the board in the truck class once again.
This was its 18th victory in a row and it won every single stage
– the most dominant Dakar team of all time. The cars are good
to watch, but the trucks are every bit as fast and utterly awe-
inspiring. They run last on stage because the ruts and channels
they dig are lethal for the bikes and quads.

110 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

DAKAR DIARY

PUB AMMO

ki
small teams on even

smaller budgets

DESERT
WARRIORS

Open to pre-2000 vehicles
it’s grown enormously in
the space of a year, from
24 entrants to near 150. It
runs as a regularity rally
(closest to average speed
wins rather than fastest)
but it’s the most compelling
class, packed with diverse
cars and astonishing
stories. The flatnose 911?
Not taking part, just in
the bivouac looking
cool. And powered by
a V8, confusingly.

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 111

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HEADLINER

YOUNG
RUFFIANS

These upgraded American classics could be from a video game,
in fact, they’re from the mind of someone who creates them...

WORDS ROWAN HORNCASTLE PHOTOGRAPHY MARK RICCIONI

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 113

The metaverse. It’s a term that’s currently using the limby tools attached to our bodies. And no one
perched precariously on the tip of the tongue of knows this more than Chris Ashton, the co-founder/design
anyone in tech. And it’s the future, apparently. director of Turtle Rock Studios.
One where we’ll live in the internet going about
our daily lives – doing day to day things – in Cutting a scrawny shape in a dimly lit garage in the
augmented reality, rather than reality reality. shadows of Orange County, California, he has the physique
Sounds like a scary Black Mirror episode, right? One that’ll and pale complexion of a slightly vitamin D deficient gamer.
never happen. But, believe it or not, it’s already here. For good reason, he’s spent his life in the digital world
Last year, people in the Philippines were ditching their day creating famous first-person shooters such as Counter-Strike,
jobs in the real world to take up jobs on Axie Infinity (an online, Left 4 Dead and Back 4 Blood. But tonight he’s not sat behind
blockchain-based game where players can earn tokens and cash a computer, rather the complete opposite: a fantastically
out in local currency), as they could make more money trading analogue and simple tool, the English wheel.
digital pets or becoming dragon blacksmiths/unicorn barbers
than a traditional job in the actual universe. “This is where I come to relax,” Chris says while rolling
But the human mind, body and soul crave physicality and thick sheet metal back and forth into a satisfying curvature.
creativity, something to tickle the left side of our brains while “As humans we need to use our hands. We intrinsically want to
create things. But through automation and digitisation we’re
inherently doing less, so this gives me great satisfaction.”

“PARKED OUTSIDE IS A
MUSTANG HE DESIGNED
AND BUILT HIMSELF, WITH
NOTHING MORE THAN
CURIOSITY AND YOUTUBE”

Remove the VR goggles, Parked outside is the result of his many, many hours behind
you’re about to enter a an English wheel and planishing hammer: a delicious mangetout
metaverse-free zone green 1970 Mustang Fastback that he designed, built and hand
formed himself with nothing more than patience, curiosity, and
a handful of YouTube videos.

“I’ve been very lucky to make some money from running
a software company. I’ve also had lots of cars [a Lamborghini
Gallardo Performante, McLaren 720S, BAC Mono, AMG GT R, C6
Corvette ZR1 and 1969 Superbee to name a few] but it got to the
point where I didn’t want to buy cars, I wanted to build cars. Not
to sell, either. Just something I can enjoy and call my own.”

That’s where the Mustang comes in. Having been obsessed
with both Seventies Mustangs and hairy chested Trans-Am
racing, Chris wanted to make himself an old school racecar
for the road. But with one fundamental caveat: it had to be
functional. What he created is a style that he’s called ‘Ruffian’.

So, a bit of rolling back
forth, and 10 minutes later
you have a car, right?

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 115

Chris spent more time on the GT40’s headlights than the bodywork, it shows. The Mustang’s tweaks aren’t subtle, but who wants a subtle Mustang anyway?

“THE GT40 IS WILD – IT LOOKS
READY FOR THE SET OF MAD
MAX, BUT IT’S FUNCTIONAL”

116 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

“I had absolutely no automotive experience,” Chris bringing the ability to mash the polar worlds of Sixties racecar
says with a chuckle of imposter syndrome. “Sure, I grew with new trends and visions, creating something completely
up working on own stuff – I was the normal grease monkey unique in the process that also doesn’t discredit the original.
teenager buying rubbish cars and working out how to keep
them going when they inevitably broke. But as I got older, Unsurprisingly, Chris’ handiwork, dedication and sickening
I got better jobs – which meant nicer cars. Cars I wanted obsession runs throughout the whole car. Attached to the Ford
to make faster. Then as my business did better, I had more Racing 52XS V8 engine (putting out 580bhp and 445lb ft) are
money to buy tools, so got into fabrication.” headers and a handmade octopus equal length exhaust. It’s a
majestic Medusa-like plait of metalwork that not only looks
Being a keen autocrosser (competitive and affordable stunning but amplifies a classic Americana noise to perfection.
grassroots racing around cones in car parks) for over 25
years, he wanted his Mustang to be capable against the clock. The headlights are also Chris’ loony work. Unhappy with
Which meant, unusually, it was the tyres that dictated the any headlight design he could find, he bought a handheld 3D
build. See, autocross is a relatively slow speed form of scanner at great expense to measure the headlight bucket.
motorsport, one that’s all about lateral grip. So Chris threw He then fed this information into his computer before
a simple solution at the problem: massive rubber – 315mm designing and 3D printing his own signature headlight
for the front and 345mm out back, all wrapped in super sticky utilising a Harley Davidson lamp. He ended up putting more
Toyo R888R track tyres. He then had to hand form three-inch hours into that one part than the whole of the Mustang’s
steel fender flares for the bodywork to make them fit. But this bodywork altogether. Which tells you a lot.
stance also makes this Mustang look the mutt’s nuts – just
like an old Trans-Am racer. What brings these two cars together is an achingly cool
home brew aesthetic derived from racing but made applicable
Chris went further. Having hit the books he knew that back for the street. Adding the autocross element and massive
in the day Trans-Am teams would bend the rules as much as rubber really rubber-stamps the visual ‘Ruffian’ look. But
possible to benefit performance. Sometimes blatantly breaking what’s next? Eight more race ready road Ruffians, all different
them. Some racing Mustangs had chunks hacked out of the and not for sale. First up, a ’64 Ford Galaxie set for big
front struts to lower the front of the car by an inch, making it circuits thanks to hidden aero and – you guessed it – crazy
handle better but also giving it a more menacing look with the 335 rubber all round. So, before we all plug ourselves into the
nose pointing down rather than level with the horizon. So metaverse, let’s take a minute to celebrate the here and now.
Chris did the same. Which dictated the engine he could put
into it, (orthodox Blue Oval fans look away now) a carburetted So... it’s not a restomod, it’s a
LS427 – GM’s aluminium-blocked 7.0-litre beast, now making massively upgraded recreation
625bhp and around 560ft lb of torque. of the original. Our heads hurt

Snooping around, you’re drawn to so many enchanting
details on the car where form follows function. Like grafting
on ’69 rear fender scoops as well as creating some louvres on
the front fenders to help with cooling. Or functional front
scoops flanking either side of the headlights, or the hinged
bar in the full roll cage to make getting in and out easier.
But they’re offset with period details that add authenticity.

Unsurprisingly, the Ruffian Mustang caught some
attention on social media, with NBA players, rappers and
sheikhs with deep pockets all sliding into Chris’ DMs wanting
to buy it. But having put three whole years of his life into
the project, he didn’t want to sell the car. In fact, he wanted
more. So he bought himself a Superformance GT40 Mark I
and set about making another Ruffian.

As you can see, it’s pretty wild – an exaggerated widebody
pseudo-cyberpunk racing slipper that looks ready for the set
of Mad Max or the metaverse. But just like the Mustang, this
one is functional. And unlike the metaverse, it’s real.

Where the Mustang was all analogue techniques and
old school knowledge, the GT40 is a different beast. It’s
underpinned by modern methodology and contemporary
componentry. Being fibreglass there weren’t slavish hours
behind an English wheel making body panels, rather much
midnight oil burnt making carbon moulds with the help of
concept artists on Instagram. See, Photoshop – for all its
failings – is quite the tool when put in the right hands,

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 117

CONCEPTS THAT TIME FORGOT TOP FIVE

TOYOTA DMT, 2001 SUPERCHARGED
CARS
118 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M
1923
MERC 6/25/40 HP KOMPRESSOR
World’s first supercharged

production car featured a
1.6-litre four-cylinder engine

that was connected to a
Roots-style blower

1929
BENTLEY 4.5-LITRE BLOWER
WO Bentley was against Tim
Birkin’s plan to supercharge
his 4½ Litre, saying it would
“pervert the engine’s design
and corrupt its performance”

1998
ASTON MARTIN VANTAGE V600
Aston had already fitted the
V550 Vantage with two Eaton
superchargers, but the V600
was fettled even more for

a 200mph top speed

2002
MERCEDES E55 AMG
Remember when
AMG was obsessed with
supercharging? The E55
featured an all-alloy 5.4-litre
s/c V8 with 469bhp

2009
VAUXHALL VXR8 BATHURST S
In a world of modern turbo
engines, the VXR8 Bathurst

S literally screamed the
benefits of supercharging to
anyone within a square mile

“WHILE IT MAY NOT REALLY
MOVE, IT DOES NOW HAVE SOME
NEW (OLD) AMG PENTA WHEELS”

Rreeapdoyr,tb19u:tTithheaBsragbotussommigehntenwotsbheoerosad

F or the past two weeks I’ve used a bedside More like slippers than which probably takes approximately the
lamp to illuminate my shower. Not in a outdoor shoes, the Merc same amount of time as it would take for
sexy way either; two of the ceiling lights me to fill in the DVLA forms.
have gone pop and they’re a bit of a faff isn’t going anywhere....
to replace. So, while a ghetto solution exists, But, what I have done is something much
I figured a better use of my time would be more exciting...
spent building Lego models from Christmas.
Because while it may not really move, it
This is particularly important because does now have some new (old) AMG Penta
– as an adult – the window in which you wheels tucked under its arches. And in the
can safely build Lego rapidly declines into spirit of keeping things authentically Eighties,
questionable browsing history as soon as the I’ve gone for a set of meaty 50-profile Falken
festive period is over. Unless you can utilise ZE310 tyres in 225/50/16 fitment. There is a
the loophole of having children. time and place for low profile tyres, but this
isn’t the car for it.
Also, for the past six months, my garage
door has refused to lock without it being Technically these aren’t the right wheels
lifted slightly. Rather than try to fix it, for a Brabus W126 either. AMG Pentas belong
I’ve spent many hours working out which on AMG-equipped Benzs, whereas the Brabus
household tool would offer the optimum range of tuning always opted for either Ronal
lift versus effort required to lock it. For the (early models) or ACT (facelift models). Don’t
record, that turned out to be a 3ft axe. worry, I’ve got that covered though.

Priorities are somewhat skewed in my Rather than replace the key battery in
brain. And, unsurprisingly, this has transferred my loved E63 – which now needs manually
into the world of cars too. The Brabus W126 starting each time – I managed to find a set
bought last year is currently sat awaiting work of ACT Mesh wheels on German eBay which
required to get it roadworthy. Namely the should turn up any day now. They’ll need
engine which, once started, sounds like an refurbishing, but it’s dawned on me the
improv jazz drummer being kicked down a boiler is due a service soon. So I’ll have
flight of stairs. plenty of time to orchestrate a diamond-cut
finish rather than worry about hot water
You might also have noticed the lack of throughout winter. Mark Riccioni
numberplates. That requires registration,
something I’ve continually put off despite Internationally renowned photographer Mark has
the fact that every 28 days I have to renew been working with TG for many, many years. When
the insurance cover note on it. Something not taking photos he’s buying inappropriate cars.
Here he shares his addiction with the world

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 119

PROGRESS REPORT

(2022) MORGAN PLUS FOUR vs MORGAN 4/4 (1966)

How does the modern Morgan compare with a car five decades its senior?

I’M NOT SURE I CAN SPOT THE DIFFERENCE AND HOW ABOUT HANDLING? WORDS: STEPHEN DOBIE, PHOTOGRAPHY: JONNY FLEETWOOD
WITH THAN KS TO: CH R IS TOWN ER FO R TH E LOAN O F H IS M O RGAN 4/4
Very funny. But I’ll concede that getting these two Morgans As well as smelling like it was made in the Sixties, the 4/4 brakes
together is a very visual demonstration of both the company’s and steers like it too. Halting for a roundabout needs forward
design language and its evolutionary philosophy. A numberplate thinking and the wheel is overly large. But it twirls around without
swap might just prove enough to divert your attention from the too much resistance and you can drive it with vigour and trust in
56-year age gap between these cars. Oh, and exterior door the chassis. Despite the Plus Four’s heap of extra performance –
handles used to be optional in the Malvern Hills. a 5.2secs 0–62mph time is probably about half its ancestor’s – the
same is true in the 2022 car. ABS helps it stop keenly, too.
SO WHAT EXACTLY AM I LOOKING AT?
SO COME ON – HOW DIFFERENT TO THEY ACTUALLY FEEL?
In period red ’n’ black is a Sixties Morgan 4/4, with a 1.6-litre 4cyl
Ford engine sending 75bhp and 98lb ft to the rear wheels via a There’s less of a gap between them than I’d anticipated, with
4spd gearbox. While its H-pattern is familiar, the lever sprouts from the experience the Plus Four delivers astonishingly faithful to a
under the dashboard and takes a minute to get comfy with. In blue car five decades its senior. Beyond the 4/4’s wing mirrors actually
is a brand new Plus Four, a 2.0-litre 4cyl BMW turbo providing the being on the wings, its glovebox locking like a Victorian dresser
rear axle with 255bhp and 258lb ft via a 6spd manual. drawer and its lack of headrests or three-point seatbelts, the
interior ambience and view up the road (via the twin bonnets) is all
I’M GUESSING THEIR PERFORMANCE DIFFERS but the same as the Plus Four’s. The newer car’s tech – Bluetooth
audio, aircon, heated seats, power steering – largely operates in
With more than three times the power, the Plus Four is the quicker the ether and doesn’t have overt visual cues. And with the side
car. But the 4/4 carries barely more than half its newer relation’s screens removed these two deliver a similar level of refinement
weight, at 660kg, and with skinnier tyres and a surprisingly and sense of safety on a 60mph country road. Which all suggests
torquey old engine, it moves more than swiftly enough. It gives Morgan makes the most tactful progress of any carmaker, keeping
you everything with zero drama, revving with linearity around its its models’ core attributes wholly intact while integrating the tech
quaint dial but delivering so much below 4,000rpm that you can we all secretly want with real subtlety. What ho!
exercise mechanical sympathy without stymying your pace.

120 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

FRONT-
DRIVEN HEROES

R E N A U LT S P O R T LESS
CLIO 172 (2003) THAN
£5K

REMEMBERING

RETRO GAMING
THE CLASSICS

#36

LOTUS ELAN LESS THRASH RALLY
M100 (1991) THAN
£10K ARCADE/NEO GEO, 1991

ALFA ROMEO LESS Has there been a more evocative title for a racing game than
ALFASUD (1975) THAN Thrash Rally? This 1991 top-down arcade racer did exactly what it said:
£15K presented you with a bunch of rally cars and invited you to thrash them.

Given that our mental image of rally driving is of a single vehicle
haring down a muddy forest track alone, Thrash Rally’s stages were
remarkably busy. You’d have to negotiate fellow competitors binning
their own vehicles in front of you, helicopters buzzing the course
and, in Kenya at least, the ever-present danger of colliding with an
unsuspecting elephant. Unconventionally for an arcade racer at the
time, Thrash Rally was designed for more conventional joystick and
button controls rather than a wheel and pedals, but that was still a
suitably precise way to chuck these miniature motors around the
various internationally themed stages.

Having sorted the slip-slidey off-road handling, Thrash Rally then
proceeded to steal absolutely everything that wasn’t nailed down
from the real life World Rally Championship and Paris-Dakar Rally. The
artwork for the game featured the uncanny (and more importantly
unauthorised) likenesses of real-life drivers including Juha Kankkunen
and, as an example, the Toyota Celica GT-Four was cunningly
renamed the Toyot GT-Four. That’ll throw them off the scent.

While Thrash Rally’s natural home was in the arcade, if you were
the sort of early Nineties kid whose dad had a Porsche 930 Turbo
and one of those enormous, boxy mobile phones, you might have
been treated to a copy of this racer for the lavishly expensive and
rare Neo Geo AES home console. A powerful machine for which
arcade-perfect games could be secured for the eye-watering
outlay of several hundred pounds apiece. It’s almost ironic, then,
that you can now pick up Thrash Rally for your Nintendo Switch
for a mere £7. Take that, inflation. Mike Channell

Bargain Corner

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 121

On sale now

Available in store Order online MagsDirect.co.uk

TOPGEAR ’S LONG-TERM CARS. TESTED & VERIFIED

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 123

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Skoda Enyaq

HELLO

£40,130 OTR/£46,850 as tested/£719 pcm

WHY IT’S HERE

Can a bargain family EV convert an electric car sceptic?

DRIVER

Andy Franklin

ONE COULD ARGUE THAT THE SKODA ENYAQ IS ONE OF THE MOST I should probably be honest: I’m a sceptic. I’m not entirely convinced
that electric cars are the future. History shows there tends to be a middle
important EVs produced so far. step before we get to the best way forward. Betamax and minidiscs anyone?
Surely that statement is only reserved for Tesla, I hear you say? Well, no. But I hope running an EV will change my mind. This big value family
bus is the ideal toe in the water for me. The only snag so far is that my
Tesla might have started the EV trend but as soon as the big boys and girls home wall charger is on order, so I have to charge in town... which is
played catch-up it was only a matter of when, not if, the trend would shift a 25-minute walk away. Ouch. It’s the future, they tell me. Honest.
to those manufacturers that are known for family oriented cars. And those
that make them affordable will be right at the front of the queue. SPECIFICATION GOOD STUFF

So here it is then, Skoda’s first purpose-built EV, and the company can’t Electric motor, 77kWh It’s got a spacious cabin
build ’em quick enough. Sadly along with that demand comes long waiting battery, RWD, 201bhp and decent overall size
times, so I feel pretty lucky TG has managed to bag one so early on. 3.7 miles per kWh, 331 miles for family use.
0–62mph in 8.2secs, 99mph
There are three Enyaqs to choose from – 60, 80 and 80x. The Enyaq BAD STUFF
iV 60 has a 58kWh battery, and the pricier 80-badged models have a 77kWh 2,107kg
battery. Everything without an x in its name is a single motor, rear-wheel The charger is far away.
drive car, while the 80x has a more powerful dual motor set-up and 4WD. MILEAGE: 8,320 OUR MPKWH: 3.0 And the indicator sound
is really loud.
We’ve opted for the 80, which has 201bhp and a 0–62mph time of
8.2secs. Skoda says this model has a WLTP combined range of 331 miles
and official consumption of 3.7 miles per kWh: both seriously impressive
stats. I’m fascinated to see if I can get anywhere near that.

We also added 21-inch metallic alloy wheels, head-up display, assisted
drive package and panoramic sunroof, bumping the price to £46,850. Oops.

124 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

Ford Mustang Mach-E

REPORT 3

£57,030 OTR/£58,180 as tested/£1,503 pcm

WHY IT’S HERE

Is an electric family SUV charming enough to be a ‘Mustang’?

DRIVER

Jack Rix

BRINGS INTO FOCUS HOW LOW AND SWOOPY THE MACH-E STYLING IS, Complaints? There’s a bit of light bleed on the left-hand edge of the
screen. Not enough to make what you’re looking at illegible, but if it was
doesn’t it, when you park it next to the Wrangler or Defender? Obviously we my £58k I’d be complaining. And the predicted range is plummeting with
didn’t risk the Mustang on any of the trails at last month’s big off-road test, the cold weather, settling at around 200 miles on a full charge however
even if it does have AWD, but to be fair it acquitted itself surprisingly well carefully I drive it. Setting the timer to preheat the car and battery works
on the cratered path leading up to our bunk house. This is an SUV with a well and probably gives you another 10 per cent, but it does require a little
very small ‘u’, but you can’t beat a bit of ride height. forward planning and for the car to be plugged in overnight.

This month though, I want to talk tech. At first glance this is a car SPECIFICATION GOOD STUFF
ladened with any and all of the technology Ford could get its hands on,
but the application is a lot more thoughtful than that. It doesn’t pretend to Twin electric motors, 4WD, Living with the Mustang is
be more autonomous than it is, but deploys radar cruise and lane keep on 98.7kWh battery, 346bhp proving to be incredibly easy
the motorway smoothly. It has an app which can lock and unlock the car, 3.3 miles per kWh, 335 miles and the image isn’t too terrible.
start it up and show your charging status, but nothing fancier than that. 0–62mph in 5.8secs, 111mph
BAD STUFF
Then there’s the slightly wackier stuff. The push buttons that electrically 2,182kg
pop the doors out instead of handles, to keep the profile of the car blemish But the badge lies. You don’t
free. Thought I was going to hate them, but they work brilliantly when you MILEAGE: 3,912 OUR MPKWH: 2.6 treat it like a Mustang. It’s a
have an armful of bags and only a pinky to spare. sensible person’s car.

The mega-screen smacks of Tesla chasing but the layout is great – the
things you need all the time in winter (heated seats, heated wheel, the
heater) are right there in the bottom right corner where you can find
them without stretching or diving into 16 submenus.

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 125

Nissan Qashqai WHAT WERE HYUNDAI i20N
THEY THINKING?
HELLO REPORT 4
This month:
£36,125 OTR/£37,270 as tested/£450pcm the Golf R’s £24,995/£25,545/£311
reversing camera
WHY IT’S HERE whoopsie WHY IT’S HERE

Can millions of Qashqai owners be wrong? Ollie Kew Is TG’s Car of the Year
Don’t get me wrong: as great to live with
DRIVER Volkswagen’s as it is to drive?
ingenious mechanism
Esther Neve to hide the reversing DRIVER
camera under the VW
SAFE IS GOOD, WE ALL LIKE SAFE. IMAGINE MY DELIGHT, THEN, WHEN roundel and prevent Stephen Dobie
it being coated in
I read that the new Nissan Qashqai has been awarded not just a five star winter crud and filth BY THE TIME YOU’RE READING
Euro NCAP rating but also Euro NCAP’s Best in Class 2021 award. Makes is a superb idea that
heading out on the M25 a less concerning experience altogether. more of the industry this, we’ll know what Hyundai’s
ought to copy. Where 2022 WRC car looks like. In fact,
Which is a very positive start to my burgeoning relationship with VW has shot itself in it ought to have already competed
this much-loved-by-many-UK-families crossover. Back in 2020, I ran the foot is by also at Monte Carlo. But being an
the smallest SUV offering from the Nissan family – the Juke. We got making the flip-up especially impatient member of
on OK, but never really bonded... as much my fault as the Juke’s, I guess. badge the boot the bobble hat brigade, I couldn’t
However, even after just one trip in the Qashqai I already felt more of release. If you reverse wait for a poke round WRC’s
a kinship with it than I ever had with the smaller Nissan. into a space in a all-new Rally1 hybrid tech.
hurry and leap out to So I finagled our i20N into a
I had no hand in specifying the QQ, but whoever made the choices grab something from test session of its rival M-Sport
(thank you Ollie Kew) did a fine job. The Qashqai you see before you is the boot, there’s a Puma in the Lake District.
a Tekna+, which means it has everything as standard – in fact there are tedious delay waiting
but two items on the QQ that are cost options: ceramic grey pearlescent for the camera to It’s been a long time since
paint and two-tone grey and pearl black roof, costing £745 and £400 fold away before top flight rally cars accurately
respectively. To be brutally honest, if you were looking to save a grand, the boot release represented something you can
you could easily get by without either of them. If you did that, the OTR un-jams. Sounds buy on the road and 2022’s new
cost would be a somewhat startlingly good value £36,125. trifling, but in drizzle, rulebook only exacerbates the
hail or a blizzard of point. An FIA-vetted steel
Two (cold) weeks into running the Nissan and, so far, my absolute frowns from queueing spaceframe chassis and 530bhp
favourite feature would have to be the Heat Pack, comprising heated drivers behind hybrid powertrain mean safety
seats, heated steering wheel and a heated windscreen – essentially a you in the station and performance are in another
winter survival pack. Closely following that on my Love List is the noise drop-off car park, realm to a stock i20N, but perhaps
the satnav makes to warn you of impending traffic cameras – highly it’s an annoyance the most immediately tangible
appropriately, it’s very similar to the noise Road Runner makes! No doubt that’d be solved with difference is actually in ride
I’ll find that very useful on several upcoming trips I need to make out to a separate boot quality. Hyundai’s hench little
the Cotswolds and into good old London town. release button. road car nearly shook my eyeballs
out as we limped over neglected
SPECIFICATION GOOD STUFF potholes. The rally ready
Puma shuffled over them
1332cc, 4cyl turbo, FWD, Loads of space in the cabin, like a hovercraft.
158bhp, 200lb ft and loads more in the boot. Full
43.8mpg, 146g/km CO2 leather interior very smart. SPECIFICATION
0–62mph in 9.2secs, 124mph
BAD STUFF 1598cc, 4cyl turbo, FWD,
1,511kg 201bhp, 203lb ft
Too soon to have complaints
MILEAGE: 7,050 OUR MPG: 41.3 yet, to be frank. Give me a month 40.4mpg, 158g/km CO2
weeks and let’s reconvene!
0–62mph in 6.2secs, 143mph

1,220kg

MILEAGE: 4,842 OUR MPG: 41.3

126 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

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Cupra Leon Estate

REPORT 5

£40,535 OTR/£42,305 as tested/£644pcm

WHY IT’S HERE

To expose “sports crossovers” as the silly idea they are.

DRIVER

Paul Horrell

I’VE BEEN HAPPY WITH THE CUPRA LEON WAGON. BUT THEN I HEARD I have actual switches on the steering wheel – I keep accidentally
brushing the Golf’s inconsistent spoke touchpads.
Ollie Kew was getting his mitts on a Golf R. The real thing, if you will.
FOMO’s baleful shadow cast itself across my contentment. Over the months, I’ve also been ensnared by the Leon’s extra
usefulness. Its longer wheelbase, 2,683mm versus the Golf’s 2,636, adds
He’d have a vast 320bhp, versus my car’s weakling 310. Kew also gets rear legroom, and the boot is beyond comparison, at 620 litres versus 374.
his cornering smarts enhanced by a torque vectoring pair of rear clutches,
and because he has the Performance Pack, the software for an actual drift I knew I liked the Cupra, but I didn’t expect it to be as good to drive as
mode. I have to get by with a so-yesterday passive rear diff. Oh and that the vaunted Golf R. Today I’ve stared down the green-eyed monster.
option allows his car to burst up to 168mph, while I’m limited to 155.
SPECIFICATION GOOD STUFF
Bar that absent 10bhp, we both have basically the same VW Group
engine, seven-speed twin-clutch transmission, all-wheel drive, multi-link 1984cc, 4cyl turbo, 4WD, As proven in this exercise, it’s as
rear suspension and a 15-stage control slider for adaptive damping. 310bhp, 295lb ft good on the road as a Golf R. And
32.8mpg, 186g/km CO2 it’s roomier and less obvious.
Down one of my favourite byways, I start in the Golf, he in the Leon. 0–62mph in 4.9secs, 155mph
The VW is impressive. The engine pulls hard and with useful bite. Its BAD STUFF
steering is sharp, well weighted and reasonably informative. But it really 1,640kg
doesn’t do anything different from my memory of the Leon. Even his On track you could make the Golf
expensive optional Akrapovič titanium exhaust doesn’t really sound that MILEAGE: 6,010 OUR MPG: 30.2 do its drifty party piece. From
great, any more than the Cupra’s electronic enhancement does. where I stand, that’s no biggy.

On the motorway, there’s nothing to split their driving positions,
comfort, refinement. It’s all terrific. They share the VW Group’s
infuriating control interface, except it’s a small win for me because

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 127

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Mercedes S500

REPORT 4

£110,325 OTR/£110,325 as tested/£1,841pcm

WHY IT’S HERE

It’s the world’s default super limo but is it too clever for its own good?

DRIVER

Jason Barlow

IT FINALLY HAPPENED. WHILE DROPPING A FAMILY MEMBER OUTSIDE low-speed brittleness that I detected over the numerous imperfections
on our roads has mostly gone. It’s still not Rolls-Royce Ghost good, but
Papworth hospital, an elderly gentleman extended a frail hand towards me then few cars are. Subjectively, I’d say it rivals the Rolls in terms of rolling
and said, “Ah, you must be my taxi driver.” refinement, and there’s negligible mechanical, tyre or wind noise on the
move. Even with the brilliant Burmester audio at serious volume, the
There’s no question I feel slightly fraudulent driving the S500. Almost S500’s sense of calm pervades everything, and that tends to percolate
all cars in this sector are bought and run by chauffeur companies or into your whole being. Kind of a mobile luxury hotel and spa, then.
high-end private hire outfits. If I’m wearing a hoodie, jeans and trainers,
I get some funny looks when I get out of the Mercedes’ driver’s door. SPECIFICATION GOOD STUFF

But it’s useful training otherwise: a good chauffeur is a very good driver 2999cc, 6cyl turbo, AWD, Hugely comfortable,
indeed, and the S500 is all about precisely engineered poise. Although it’s 429bhp, 384lb ft outstanding refinement,
5.3m long, has considerable reserves of power and can seriously hustle if 32.5mpg, 202g/km CO2 handles well if you need it to.
hustling is called for, this is a car that prefers to stay in its lane. It’s designed 0–62mph in 4.9secs, 155mph
to reduce your heart rate rather than intensify it. BAD STUFF
2,065kg
In fact, its AI can tell when the driver is under pressure or behaving Some of the tech is overreaching
erratically, prompting the car to recommend whichever of its onboard MILEAGE: 10,900 OUR MPG: 32.2 itself and interfering in the
‘well-being’ programmes is most appropriate. Paradoxically, this actually driving experience.
makes me more irritated, as is the case with any software – Spotify, social
media, YouTube – that presumes to know what I want or might like.

No, as unfashionable as this may sound, I actually and actively enjoy
driving it. For some reason, its ride quality seems to have improved since
it arrived in October: its primary ride has always been superb, but the

128 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

FIAT 500 500 Porsche 911 Carrera
NUGGETS
REPORT 3 REPORT 4
Massive 10.25in screen and
£27,995/£30,132/£257 a fairly modern infotainment £84,870 OTR/£93,646 as tested/£1,010pcm

WHY IT’S HERE system on our 500 Icon WHY IT’S HERE

What’s it like to live with This rather unresponsive Can ‘the only sports car you’ll ever need’ turn its hand to anything?
an urban EV without 7.0in unit is the biggest you
home charging? DRIVER
can get in the ICE 500
DRIVER Ollie Marriage
But check out what you get
Greg Potts in the boggo 500 Action EV. “NOT ELECTRIC... YET.” IT’S A PHRASE THAT APPLIES TO THE PORSCHE
Yep, a smartphone holder
HAVING FINALLY MANAGED TO 911 as much as it applies to the ship that takes Extreme E around the
world. But there’s one key difference. Only one of them is likely to go
pry the keys to the baby Fiat from electric. And, despite what’s written on the side, it’s not the one that floats.
Vijay’s hands, things didn’t start
off brilliantly between us. As I had It’s no secret that the 992-generation 911, launched in 2019, has been
a long trip planned that’d need a designed to take a hybrid system. Given that for the last two generations
full tank of electricity, I decided to the 911 has worked on an eight-year cycle with a mid-term facelift
fill it up while I slept using one of halfway through, an enhanced 992 – complete with a hybrid version
the local lamp post chargers that – is likely to be along in 2023.
are so prevalent in my part of
Westminster. I’ve used them Let’s assume a hybrid 911 will be a plug-in. Given it already uses the
before on all manner of test cars 8spd PDK gearbox from the Panamera – which has room for an e-motor
and they’re generally pretty good in it – it would make sense to carry over further elements from that
for a night-time charge. car. Would the benefit of being able to do short journeys on electric
outweigh the drawback of the extra weight on the dynamics? No.
At 5.52kW they should fill the Because as I’ve proved, the 911 is already efficient.
42kWh batteried Fiat in seven
hours. Unfortunately, the Fiat failed But the hybrid will likely be merely a step to full EV. Assuming
to connect to every lamp post that Porsche sticks to the usual 911 timescale, the 992’s replacement will be
wasn’t blocked by an inconsiderate along in 2027. That one will probably be fully hybrid, and EV-ready for
(and completely within their rights the mid-life update. The next one (2035) will have to be EV only.
because the spaces aren’t reserved
for EVs) ICE driver. To make We can pretty much guarantee it’ll continue to be the best car of its
matters worse, Ubitricity took a £6 kind, so I suspect – fear – that that car would find a willing audience. A
fee from my bank account on every new audience for whom history and legacy means less and technological
failed attempt, though this was progress means more. An audience that sees driver involvement as
eventually refunded. The end result tiresome rather than the be all and end all. And because it sold well and
meant the next day’s journey was Porsche is a business, the firm would just move on. And there’d be us,
split by doing half in the Fiat and left in the dust bemoaning better days.
then swapping into the long-term
Golf R for the remainder in order
to make a photoshoot on time.

SPECIFICATION Except Fiat doesn’t reengineer SPECIFICATION GOOD STUFF
it for the UK so your phone
Electric motor, 42kWh faces the passenger side 2981cc, 6cyl twin-turbo, So well engineered, stands
battery, FWD, 118bhp RWD, 380bhp, 332lb ft as a reminder of why engines
4.7 miles per kWh, 199 miles Action does still get the 27.4mpg, 233g/km CO2 are great.
7.0in driver display. Can 0–62mph in 4.2secs, 182mph
0–62mph in 9.0secs, 93mph also show maps or music BAD STUFF
1,505kg
1,465kg It will probably one day go
MILEAGE: 7,141 OUR MPG: 28.4 electric. And go hybrid much
MILEAGE: 7,125 OUR MPKWH: 4.0 sooner than that.

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 129

ASTON MARTIN DBX POLESTAR 2

REPORT 8 REPORT 2

£158,000/£185,000/£1,899 £45,900/£58,900/£660

WHY IT’S HERE WHY IT’S HERE

It’s the car to save Is the Polestar 2 the thoughtful
Aston Martin – is it and better alternative to a
good enough? Tesla Model 3?

DRIVER DRIVER

Adam Waddell Tom Ford

ASTON MARTIN HAS ANNOUNCED WINTER IS NOT ELECTRIC

a new, more powerful DBX called car friendly, slowing battery
the DBX707 (see p22). It’s called chemistry to the point where it
that because 707 is the amount feels like the range is hibernating
of metric horsepower its 4.0 turbo along with the world’s tortoise
V8 motor puts out. This gets it to population. But the P2 hits
62mph in 3.6secs on to a 193mph roughly 180 miles of real-world
top speed, which is 0.9secs and range if you don’t change anything
12mph faster than the standard about your driving style. You’ll
car, making it the world’s fastest get 200 if you’re driving super
production SUV. Compared with carefully, about two-thirds of
our car, it has a larger grille, slightly the possible WLTP range of 299.
bigger 23in alloys and a small
carbon spoiler on the rear wing. With my eclectic driving
We shot it alongside our test car for requirements, I’ve spent more
a film (look on topgear.com) and than my fair share of time
as you can see, the two cars aren’t investigating the UK’s charging
dramatically different. No doubt network, from a variety of
plenty of DBX buyers will go for the suppliers. The results have been
new range topper, and given that mixed. There’s more over on
the DBX already handles like a GT TG.com, but suffice to say I
car, it should be more than capable haven’t so much got range anxiety
of handling the extra power, as much as infrastructure anxiety.
although the suspension and Several bad experiences leading
damping have been tweaked for me to overthink and – on most
good measure. However, don’t be journeys – overcharge my car, just
put off the standard car – I can so I maintain options whenever I
report that it’s more than spritely get to a public unit. And don’t get
enough for a 2.2 tonne SUV, and I me started on queueing, signage
rather like it as it is... and actual deliverable charge
speeds. It’s a lot of learning...
SPECIFICATION
SPECIFICATION
3982cc, V8 TT, AWD,
542bhp, 516lb ft Twin electric motors, 4WD,
19.8mpg, 323g/km CO2 75kWh battery, 405bhp

0–62mph in 4.5secs, 181mph 3.3 miles per kWh, 299 miles

2,245kg 0–62mph in 4.7secs, 127mph

MILEAGE: 10,125 OUR MPG: 20.1 2,188kg

130 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M MILEAGE: 5,933 OUR MPKWH: 2.6

Citroen C4

REPORT 5

£26,605 OTR/£27,200 as tested/£321pcm

WHY IT’S HERE

Is this the comfiest family car you can buy?

DRIVER

Sam Philip

THIS MONTH I HAVE MOSTLY BEEN CURSING THE LACK OF BMW X6s ON

Britain’s roads. Not a situation I ever thought I’d find disappointing, but
hey, here we are.

See, some of the crueller members of the TG editorial team have taken
to referring to the Citroen C4 as the ‘baby BMW X6’ – a comparison that,
it’s fair to say, isn’t meant as a compliment to the French crossover.

Thus, in a bid to prove how very different the subtle(ish) Citroen and
brash Beemer really are, I have taken to trawling local neighbourhoods
in search of an X6 next to which to photograph the C4.

Thus far – despite the UK containing some 15,000 X6s – not a sausage.
I’ve spotted a couple out on the road, but I’ll be honest, not an easy pitch
to convince an X6 driver to pull over and allow you to photograph their
car for the purpose of demonstrating how offensive it is.

So you’ll just have to take my word for it: yes, there might be some
similarity to their tall-coupe silhouettes, but the C4 is several thousand
per cent less offensive than the X6.

Part of that, I think, comes down to simple size: while the X6 is a
hulking great snouter of a machine, measuring nearly five metres from
nose to tail, the C4 is, in the flesh, a deceptively compact specimen: over
half a metre shorter than an X6 and 170mm lower in the roofline too.

And then there’s the badge. Does any marque have a less in-yer-face
image than Citroen? Stick the double chevron on the front of an assault
rifle, and everyone would go, “Ahh, I bet it’s comfy though, isn’t it?”

When not fruitlessly hunting X6s, this month I have also mostly been
discovering how the C4 handles the mean, muddy roads of rural Devon.
And the answer is: really quite nicely, thank you very much. The C4
absorbed Dartmoor’s terrible roads with impressive competence and
impressive lack of terrible-noises-of-underbody-scraping-against-tarmac.

I’ve also long held that anything with a faintly crossover-ish
persuasion looks better caked in a proper spray tan of road grime, a
theory that has absolutely nothing to do with me being too lazy to keep
my cars spick and span. And I reckon the C4 again proves the point, its
careful patina of mud, muck and horse manure adding a pleasing hint
of WRC to its complicated bodywork. OK, OK, I’ll get it cleaned.

SPECIFICATION GOOD STUFF

1199cc, 3cyl turbo, FWD, Economy is on the up. Previously
129bhp, 170lb ft very-early-forties, I’m now into
44.7mpg, 131g/km CO2 the mid-forties.
0–62mph in 9.4secs, 130mph
BAD STUFF
1,278kg
I have literally no rational
MILEAGE: 8,050 OUR MPG: 44.1 explanation for why economy
is on the up. A helpful tailwind?

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BMW M3 Competition BMW M3 Competition xDrive

GOODBYE HELLO

£75,660 OTR/£86,745 as tested/£1,260pcm £78,425 OTR/£95,370 as tested/£1,640pcm

WHY IT’S HERE WHY IT’S HERE

Is BMW’s mighty M3 still the performance saloon benchmark? The M3 has gone 4WD. Is it good enough to steal sales from the RS4?

DRIVER DRIVER

Rowan Horncastle Rowan Horncastle

HOW DOES THE OLD INSTAGRAM ADAGE GO AGAIN? NEW YEAR, NEW with a decent-sized boot and an aspirational badge on the front. This one
is no different. It’s just the G80 blends its performance and day to
me? Well, here’s TopGear’s take: new year, new M3. day functionality in a more cohesive way than before.
For 2022 our M3 has magically changed colour. And VIN number.
At first, I thought this would be an issue – a 500bhp super saloon
Why? Well, having racked up 15,000 miles in a few months, a slightly that didn’t feel special enough as it didn’t obnoxiously display its
shocked BMW has politely put out a summons notice for the return of performance. But trust me, there’s plenty of violent shove and go.
YA70 TWW. We’re told it’s required back at the Bavarian mothership Yes, it can be dialled up and down via various menus – summoned or
before we batter the odometer further and it becomes “difficult to silenced with synthesisers in the Harman Kardon speakers – but if you
remarket”. AKA, stop driving the bloody thing otherwise we’ll never want a demonstration of what it’s capable of just keep your right foot
be able to resell it. pinned and have the audacity to tell me it’s not fast when you hit
0–62mph in under four seconds.
But there’s a reason it’s riddled with so many miles: it’s just so easy
to pile them on. I’ve not been trying to complete some sadistic endurance You can probably tell I’ve become remarkably fond of the emerald
challenge either. It’s just so damn good at doing the day-to-day car thing weapon. Don’t get me wrong, it lacks emotional awareness and character
and has slotted into my high-mileage lifestyle fantastically. so isn’t pulling at my heartstrings in the same way other cars would. But
it is German after all. And there is that controversial front end that some
The word ‘daily’ gets on my nerves. I am convinced you can ‘daily’ people still can’t get over (I can and have). So without wanting to sound
anything; it just requires an adequate mindset and an aversion to like a selfish brat (while sounding like a selfish brat with a short temper
meaningful friendships. But the M3 is a fantastic daily (two secs while and low blood sugar) I didn’t want to give the car back early. Especially as
I vom) because it’s just a 3-Series. But faster. And BMW’s 3ers have been it’s still on the same set of tyres it arrived on, making me think I haven’t
hacking around getting silly miles on them since they were invented. In
my eyes, they’ve always been the definitive mid-sized four-door saloon

132 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

been trying hard enough. So we reached a compromise to see out the rest A large chunk of that is taken up by the M carbon ceramic brakes with
of the loan. A lovely 500bhp wine red compromise. blingy gold calipers (£7,995) and I’m looking forward to seeing what
difference they make. The already hefty 1,730kg G80 M3 Competition
For the next four months we’ll be running YC71AVK . There is a very needed all the help it could get. And this 4WD has an extra 50kg piled
fundamental difference between the two cars though. Where the green on top. Other than that, the only differences are the £1,100 paint (a
car sent all its power to the rear wheels, the red one splits it between all wonderfully sophisticated and brooding ‘Aventurine III’ that adds a
four. Yep, controversially, it’s a four-wheel-drive M3 – the first xDrive subtle, pseudo statesmanship to what can easily be labelled a chav’s
M3 ever. I’m here to see if that’s a stroke of genius or sacrilege. car), a black interior (still with all the carbon trimmings and those
awesome seats) and – oddly – the deletion of the wireless charging.
Still being a Competition model (the only M3 we can get in the UK,
remember) the engine is identical to the green 2WD car, a 3.0-litre The car is currently on winter tyres, which, as you can read in Ollie
twin-turbo straight-six with over 500bhp paired with an 8spd automatic Kew’s test on page 86 is a wise choice at this time of year. But when the
gearbox. There is a difference in price though as you have to think of weather starts warming up I’m keen to try the car on the optional, sticky
BMW’s xDrive 4WD system as an option you fit to the car rather than Cup 2 track tyres. Four-wheel drive and those bad boys means this could
a separate model. It costs £2,765 to add to the £75,660 M3 saloon or be an absolute traction-tastic rocket ship. The training to get in shape for
£76,990 M4 coupe. Which is a lot to begin with. Because when you the potentially brutal g forces it’ll deliver begins now because – as the old
throw a load of options at it the price jumps to – wait for it – £95,370. Instagram adage goes – “summer bodies are made in winter”, right?
Making it £10k more expensive than the green car. Sheesh.

SPECIFICATION GOOD STUFF SPECIFICATION GOOD STUFF

2993cc, 6cyl twin-turbo, Controversy has followed the 2993cc, 6cyl twin-turbo, A four-wheel-drive M3? On winter
RWD, 503bhp, 479lb ft G80 M3 since its reveal. But the AWD, 503bhp, 479lb ft tyres! Could this be the ultimate
27.7mpg, 234g/km CO2 proof is in the pudding: it’s still a 27.7mpg, 234g/km CO2 performance winter hack?
0–62mph in 3.9secs, 155mph proper everyday super saloon... 0–62mph in 3.5secs, 155mph
BAD STUFF
1,805kg BAD STUFF 1,855kg
Adding two more driven wheels
MILEAGE: 14,743 OUR MPG: 26.4 We have to give it back. But MILEAGE: 4,040 OUR MPG: 28.6 and expensive brakes means
we don’t want to. this is near enough a £100k M3!

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 133

Peugeot 508 PSE SW

REPORT 2

£55,795 OTR/£55,795 as tested/£830pcm

WHY IT’S HERE

Fast Peugeots are best kept small. What about a fast PHEV wagon?

DRIVER

Vijay Pattni

THE FIRST 508 THAT ARRIVED BACK IN 2010 WASN’T, LET’S SAY, But what I really wasn’t prepared for was point three – the admiration
thrown the 508’s way. Some anecdotes: a couple of young gentlemen leapt
particularly easy on the eye, which made it all the more surprising when out of a C-Class while at a petrol station specifically to pore over the PSE’s
Peugeot seemingly leaped a chasm of styling choices in a single bound and details. “Is that a Peugeot?” one asked. I nodded. “Looks great,” he said.
launched this lovely second-generation car.
At another service stop further up the motorway, the same routine –
It’s a smart design, only enhanced by the estate guise that TG is lots of stares, a few points of the finger, even a thumbs up – basically the
running. The distinctive lines seem to fit the booted 508 just that little bit kind of fare usually reserved for those piloting supercars.
more. Long story short, facing a 500-odd mile trip to the Lake District and
back, I wanted to, let’s say “further investigate the charms” of this SPECIFICATION GOOD STUFF
delightful design. Definitely not because BabyCar – TG’s electric Fiat 500
– would have needed a few long-winded charging stops along the way. So 1598cc, 4cyl turbo, 4WD, Under the radar and all the better
I pinched the Pug from regular keeper Charlie. 355bhp, 384lb ft for it. You can keep your shouty,
138.9mpg, 46g/km CO2 aggressive, German wagons.
Humans and retriever packed into the 508, we embarked on our odyssey 0–62mph in 5.2secs, 155mph
north. A few things became immediately clear. One: the driving position is BAD STUFF
comically eccentric. You have to either sit super low and jack the steering 1,850kg
wheel height up, or vice versa (sit high, wheel low) to stand any chance of Back a while, Peugeots weren’t
properly viewing the dash. I opted for the latter. MILEAGE: 9,832 OUR MPG: 35.7 the best looking. Some just can’t
get past that. We can.
Second, the ride is good, but I found it to be a touch busy on a long haul.
But then it’s going up against German competitors, and of course boasts
20in alloys and a suspension set-up that’s 50 per cent stiffer than a standard
508. Not a deal-breaker – or back-breaker – but something to note.

134 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

EXHAUST
BECAUSE KNOWLEDGE IS POWER

BEGINNER’S
GUIDE TO
CITROEN

From greatest hits
to lowest moments,
everything you ever
wanted to know...
and a fair bit you didn’t

WORDS SAM BURNE T T,
CRAIG JAMIESON, GREG POTTS

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 135

GO TO IMAGES: MANUFACTURER

TOPGEAR.COM

FOR MORE
MIND-BLOWING
MANUFACTURER

GUIDES

What’s Citroen, and
when did it start making cars?

Citroen is the brainchild of André Citroën, born as good for the common man as it would be the first one two months later and put it in a
in Paris in 1878. He started the car company in bad for his business. As far back as 1916, André showroom a month after that. On the Champs-
March 1919, right after a momentous war that was already planning a switch to car building, Élysées, of course. Where else?
you might remember from your history books drawing on his experience at Mors (an early
as World War One. car manufacturer) and enlisting the help of Sadly Citroen went bankrupt in 1934 but was
a series of proven engineers. snapped up by Michelin. Founder André died the
The reason we mention this particularly following year, but the Citroen brand became
unsavoury chapter is that Monsieur Citroën So that’s why, just four months after the synonymous with pioneering engineering. The
built armaments for France during WW1 and end of one of the deadliest conflicts in history, French government brokered a merger with
soon realised that the end of the war would be Citroen was able to announce its first car, build Peugeot in 1974 and the rest is history.

136 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

EXHAUST

Citroen’s greatest hits

01 02 03

04 05 06

07 08 09

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 137

What’s the cheapest car FACTOID
Citroen builds... and what’s
the most expensive? Did you hear about
how Citroen left
The new Ami is set to go on sale in the UK in If we’re going to go for the most expensive, the US market in
2022, and although prices for the tiny electric car it’s – as you’d expect – at the other end of the
haven’t been confirmed, it should sell for around spectrum, among the more barge-like offerings. the Seventies? The
£6k. In terms of cars you could go out and buy If we still consider DS under Citroen’s purview company was in full
now, the cheapest Citroen is the deceptively tiny (even if it’s ostensibly a ‘standalone’ brand now tech overload mode
C1. That car starts at £12,495, for which the under corporate overlords Stellantis), the DS9
company will supply essentials such as wheels, will fit the bill for most expensive. You can expect with the updated
two doors and a roof. It might take 14secs to do to pay £57,200 for the PHEV 4x4 saloon in Rivoli DS, equally divine
the 0–62mph run, but it’s rated at nearly 70mpg. trim. Just try and ignore the depreciation. SM and forward-
thinking GS. The DS
wasn’t selling well
in the USA because
some of its best
features were nixed
or watered down by
US legislators (Citroen
had to use brake fluid
in the hydropneumatic
suspension). The many
changes enforced by
US regs across the
range meant Citroen
was forced to abandon
sales. Triste fois.

What is Citroen’s fastest car?

Up until recently, Citroen’s 2018 that “performance is only makes our choice that specialist, which kitted out
fastest car would have been not as big a focus anymore much more thrilling – the the car with a twin-turbo V6
one of its lovely rally efforts, – because of CO2 regulations specially tweaked 1971 SM and set the 202mph speed
but sadly the French and customer demand”. Oof. that hit a frankly terrifying record. The coolest part
carmaker pulled the plug on 202.3mph at the Bonneville was the second SM modified
its WRC campaign in 2019. Really, asking after the Salt Flats back in 1987. into a pickup complete with
Citroen chassis engineer, fastest Citroen is like finding trailer for carting the record
Nicolas Berlinger, said in the wettest desert or the least It was developed by a breaker about.
talented guitarist. But that Los Angeles-based Citroen

138 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

NOTABLE EXHAUST
PEOPLE
Where are Citroens built, and
André Citroën how many are sold a year?
His Traction Avant of
1934 set the template for 760,876
the modern family car
Citroens are largely built in France, as you’d expect. At last count
Pierre Michelin there were no fewer than four French factories dedicated to
Tyre heir died young, but put building various examples of Citroens and sister brand, DS.
family firm and Citroen on the
There are also factories in Spain, Turkey, India, Brazil , Slovakia
right track while in charge and Argentina as well as joint venture plants in the likes of China,

Paul Magès India, Iran and so on. In terms of numbers, Citroen sold 760,876
Impressive engineer invented cars in 2020 (including DSes), an almost 30 per cent drop in a year
hydro-pneumatic suspension
beset by production stoppages, supply issues and the impact of
that set Citroen apart COVID-19. Still, it was over 100,000 more than Opel/Vauxhall, in
case there happens to be any internal PSA Group competition.

What’s the best concept
Citroen’s made?

Sébastien Loeb You’d think it’d be the GT by Citroen, given a) from 1972 that sits atop the Car of the Year-
The most successful rally it looks incredible and b) we actually managed winning platform of the GS. It had as much
driver of all time won his to drive one – and park it in front of Harrods, chance of actually being made as the sequel
outdoing the manifold sons of industry who to Battlefield Earth. But, unlike that, the GS
titles driving Citroens parked up beside us. But it isn’t. Carmargue was something we actually wanted
to see more of. The Bertone/Citroen relationship
Carlos Tavares Instead, we’re going to hand it to the GS developed further, leading to the BX in 1982.
Current Stellantis boss will Carmargue, a Bertone-designed masterpiece
want to maintain Citroen
identity in new megacorp

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 139

What’s been Citroen’s What’s been Citroen’s

best moment? worst moment?

It’s quite subjective – ask someone in an anorak and bobble hat and it’s Well, probably when it went bankrupt that one time. And then that other
the basically unimpeachable career of Citroen’s WRC team. For others, time. We’d say it would be the second time it went broke, after the people
it’s the non-stop (well, until Peugeot took over, at least) innovation and in charge decided that technological innovation at all costs was the path
invention. Or that time that technology literally saved a president’s life. to Citroen’s success. So they invested in all kinds of stuff, including a
series of all-new bespoke models, rotary engines and even buying Panhard,
Or, for history buffs, how about the French Resistance’s affinity for Berliet and Maserati. That’s the most bitesize GCSE Bitesize version of
the Traction Avant, which helped give more than a few officers in Nazi- Citroen’s activities in the Sixties and Seventies.
occupied France sleepless nights. Or when Citroen hid the plans and
prototypes of the 2CV from the Nazis, lest they get their mitts on the And the results were some lovely cars, like the GS, CX and loveliest GT
French people’s car and ‘pay homage’ to the car, like with the Tatra V570. of all time, the SM. Then some abject failure and incredible expense for
rotary engines. The end of Panhard and Berliet, and subjecting Maserati
Citroen destroyed, hid or literally buried the 2CV to keep it secret from to the De Tomaso era, which saw brilliance like the Bora and Merak give
the occupiers, and Citroen VP Pierre Boulanger was so unhelpful to the way to dross like the Biturbo. But then, as the dearly departed Purple
Nazis that the Gestapo reportedly labelled him an “enemy of the Reich”. Prince once said, “Life is just a party and parties aren’t meant to last.”
So Citroen’s best moment was its Indiana Jones-esque foiling of the Nazis.

140 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

What’s Citroen’s most EXHAUST
surprising moment?
LOGO
To be fair, Citroen basically existed for surprising moments. Completely EVOLUTION
revolutionising suspension, delivering such incredible ride quality that
Rolls-Royce asked to licence the tech for its cars. Front-wheel drive, to 1919
keep the weight of the engine pressing on the driven wheels to aid traction
and improve cabin space. Four-wheel independent suspension and unitary Double chevron logo
bodies when rivals were still using body-on-frame and solid axles. was based on a fancy

But the most surprising part for us was not of Citroen’s own making. gearbox design
After Peugeot bailed out Citroen, it didn’t set Citroen back to doing what
it did best – dreaming big and thinking differently. Instead of keeping 1959
Peugeot as the sensible, reliable car and Citroen as the outlandish inventor
(that Peugeot could nick the best bits from for its cars), Peugeot ditched A bit of texture as the
being sensible or well built and made Citroen as Peugeot-ish as possible. brand moved into the
It’s like hiring Frank Zappa to play 12-bar blues.
swinging Sixties

1966

Yellow and cobalt blue
were the Citroen colours

for a long time there

1985

Eighties redesign
coincides with the
brand’s angular peak

2009

A softer, more metallic
look for the chevrons in

the new millennium

2016

Monochrome matte
look is all the rage in

the digital age

T O P G E A R . C O M › M A R C H 2 0 2 2 141

EXHAUST

Now you’re a Citroen expert,
it’s time to buy one...

Citroen DS / 1955–1975 / £10,000–£60,000

What is it? roof made from lightweight fibreglass. The Dreaded rot
front brakes were mounted inboard to reduce Rust will form where
If humans one day leave Earth and decide to ship unsprung weight. Citroen was way ahead of seals have been
only 10 automobiles from history to our new rivals on installing radial tyres. All this in 1955, allowed to perish –
home in the stars, a Citroen DS will have to be when we still had steam trains and a black ’n’ check around the pillars
there, nestled among the Ford Model T and white TV was a luxury. and windscreen frame
Ferrari F40. Citroen at its absolute maddest.
The whole car was suspended on hydro- Driving
pneumatic, automatically levelling independent
suspension that would absorb the bumps from Drive another classic from the era, an E-type
France’s notoriously rough roads, and even raise or old American muscle car, say, and the reality
the car for more clearance. Range Rovers of elderly brakes, suspension and steering may
wouldn’t be able to do that for decades. Heck, crush your fantasy. The DS isn’t like that. It’s
they weren’t invented for another 14 years. quite simply one of the most comfortable cars
ever made, yet also handles gamely, and is
The power steering and semi-automatic extremely relaxing and beguiling to drive.
gearbox were hydraulically operated and the

WORDS OLLIE KEW Don’t be intimidated
There’s nearly 70 years of expertise built
up in keeping these on the road. So take
a big gulp and go in with your eyes open

142 M A R C H 2 0 2 2 › T O P G E A R . C O M

Old hands tell newbies not to bother slowing On the inside Phone a friend
for speed bumps to avoid having to change gear. These are specialist
Sounds brutish, but the hydraulic suspension The DS was updated throughout its life, and cars, so it’s worth having
completely irons out the bump. A modern steadily inherited more conventional features a specialist check over
giant-wheeled Merc S-Class or BMW 7-Series like round instrument clocks, a more usual dash your potential buy
will get nowhere near this level of ride comfort design and easier to operate vents. The driving
and control. Only a Rolls gets anywhere close. position is more upright than you might expect,
because the plump seats are close to the large
The semi-automatic transmission takes wheel. It’s eminently comfortable, mind. The
learning – there’s no clutch pedal, but you still wraparound front screen is close enough to feel
select a gear using the slender stalk that sprouts more like a visor, but the swept-back, ultra-slim
from the dash. It’s not to be rushed, so you don’t pillars allow for a panoramic view.
wear out the clutch. Lift off, move the lever one
notch, wait for the engine to settle, then proceed The DS is worthy not only of its reputation
with accelerating. It takes tender teamwork and as one of Citroen’s great cars, but as a machine
builds a relationship. that changed the landscape. And it’s impossibly
cool to boot – drive one before you die.

Servicing niggles
To replace worn brakes you’ll have to
disassemble the driveshafts, calipers, and
radiator, because they’re mounted inboard

Suspended disbelief Next
The car should take 10–20 seconds to rise month:
into its driving stance. If it doesn’t settle on Kia
the level, you’ve got a dud. Run away

CITY CARS SUPERMINIS FAMILY HATCHBACKS

These small cars are perfect for urban life, You drive mostly around town, with occasional A good electric family hatch needs decent
but the trade-off is a much lower range need for longer distances? Try these for size range without compromising interior space

1. HONDA e 1. BMW i3 1. HYUNDAI IONIQ 5

PRICE: £34,365–£37,465 RANGE: Up to 136 miles PRICE: £33,805–£34,805 RANGE: Up to 189 miles PRICE: £37,420–£47,890 RANGE: Up to 298 miles

This TG favourite has retro styling and a brilliant Remember when BMWs used to be cool? Well the Hyundai’s newest addition is much bigger than it
interior, but it’s a smidge expensive and the range i3 does. Perhaps the only model in the company’s looks in pics, but comes with solid range, loads of
isn’t great. Somehow we can’t help but love it... range where everyone else will be tailgating you. space and a host of life-enhancing touches inside.

2. MINI ELECTRIC 2. PEUGEOT e-208 2. POLESTAR 2

PRICE: £27,000–£35,050 RANGE: Up to 145 miles PRICE: £28,225–£33,875 RANGE: Up to 232 miles PRICE: £39,900–£45,900 RANGE: Up to 337 miles

The electric version of the home-grown favourite The e-208 is competent and stylish, but ultimately Undercover Volvo offers Scandinavian attention to
squeezes the BMW i3’s powertrain into a familiar you’ll fall into one of two camps: outraged about the detail paired with a level of build quality that would
package. Range not massive, but the car’s still fun. tiny steering wheel or you don’t understand the fuss. shame a number of much more expensive cars.

3. FIAT 500 3. RENAULT ZOE 3. KIA EV6

PRICE: £23,835–£33,835 RANGE: Up to 199 miles PRICE: £27,595–£30,495 RANGE: Up to 245 miles PRICE: £40,945–£51,945 RANGE: Up to 328 miles

The latest version of the 500 offers sharper looks, They grow up so fast, don’t they? The Zoe’s not long It’s not just Volkswagen that can do platform sharing
good value and decent range – and a parcel shelf turned eight, but a recent refresh has given the car – Hyundai/Kia’s efforts are pretty solid. The EV6 is
full of soft toys shouldn’t hurt the battery too much. a boost. The entry model is a touch underpowered. smaller than the Ioniq 5 but still massively impressive.

4. VW e-Up 4. VAUXHALL CORSA-e 4. RENAULT MEGANE E-TECH

PRICE: From £24,085 RANGE: 159 miles PRICE: £25,805–£29,410 RANGE: Up to 209 miles PRICE: £tbc RANGE: Up to 292 miles

It’s always been one of the finest city cars out there, A Peugeot e-208 in a Vauxhall suit – the EV’s gone Renault hopes to bring a bit of va va voom (French
but you’ve got to be sure you could cope with all of fully mainstream. This is the one to buy if you don’t for increased car sales) to its electric line-up with this
the Yorkshire-accented jokes that plague the e-Up. want anyone to notice you’ve taken the plunge. larger electric Megane. Early signs are promising.

FOR ALL THE FACTS, STATS AND IN-DEPTH REVIEWS FOR EVERY NEW CAR ON SALE GO TO TOPGEAR.COM/REVIEWS

READY TO MAKE THE SWITCH?
WE SEPARATE WHAT’S HOT FROM WHAT’S NOT

COMPACT SUVS FAMILY FRIENDLY SUVS PREMIUM SUVS

Small, but perfectly formed. These cars are a Slightly larger electric cars that are designed Go big or go home, we say. Wafting along
perfect second motor or teeny family wagon to cope with everything you can throw at them in style is perfect for an electric powertrain

1. PEUGEOT e-2008 1. FORD MUSTANG MACH-E 1. JAGUAR I-PACE

PRICE: £33,230–£38,380 RANGE: Up to 206 miles PRICE: £41,330–£67,225 RANGE: Up to 379 miles PRICE: £65,245–£76,695 RANGE: Up to 286 miles

Wait, when did Peugeots become so desirable The Mach-E isn’t really a Mustang at all, or a men’s The I-Pace is the electric vehicle you’ll want to
again? The e-2008 is surprisingly fun to drive and razor, but it looks pretty good. It’s definitely a Ford show off to your neighbours. If they’ll listen to you.
offers a chic interior with lots of nifty touches. though, so relentless competence is guaranteed. Decent range, solid performance and great looks.

2. HYUNDAI KONA ELECTRIC 2. SKODA ENYAQ 2. BMW iX

PRICE: £28,950–£37,200 RANGE: Up to 300 miles PRICE: £34,850–£47,035 RANGE: Up to 336 miles PRICE: £69,905–£96,905 RANGE: Up to 380 miles

The Kona is highly specced, offers a solid slug As usual, Skoda offers a down-to-earth and slightly A lovely cabin and it’s not too bad to drive – which is
of range and looks pretty sharp too. Good value, cheaper alternative to whatever Volkswagen is great, because inside the BMW iX is one of the few
good range and good looking. What’s not to like? pumping out. To great effect, as it turns out... places where you don’t have to look at the outside.

3. VOLVO XC40 RECHARGE 3. VOLKSWAGEN ID.4 3. BMW iX3

PRICE: £43,550–£56,050 RANGE: 249 miles PRICE: £34,995–£56,380 RANGE: Up to 320 miles PRICE: £60,970–£63,970 RANGE: Up to 282 miles
VW’s new electric SUV gets the basics right and
‘Normal’ XC40 is a peach, and electric version adds offers impressive range – just depends which side Slightly stealthier than some of BMW’s more
Polestar 2 powertrain to great effect. Expensive, but of the buttonless interior fence you sit on, really. aesthetically challenging EVs, this car is essentially
you won’t have to explain to everyone what it is. an electric translation of the bestselling X3 SUV.

4. VAUXHALL MOKKA-e 4. AUDI Q4 e-tron 4. AUDI e-tron

PRICE: £29,365–£30,495 RANGE: 201 miles PRICE: £43,115–£66,145 RANGE: Up to 316 miles PRICE: £62,025–£94,925 RANGE: Up to 252 miles
Audi’s version of the ID.4 matches solid powertrain
We’re not exactly sure how to feel about finding a with predictably decent interior. Low-profile exterior Audi’s effort is the safest premium bet if you’re
Vauxhall stylish, must be the pandemic strain. New too, if you don’t want to shout about going electric. worried about switching, but overall it’s a fairly
Mokka-e gets PSA undercrackers, so it’s decent too. conventional EV, just with cameras for mirrors.

FOR ALL THE FACTS, STATS AND IN-DEPTH REVIEWS FOR EVERY NEW CAR ON SALE GO TO TOPGEAR.COM/REVIEWS

PERFORMANCE EVs SPECIAL MENTIONS “I’VE BOUGHT ONE!
WHAT NOW?”
For when money’s no object and the sky’s The EVs that have caught our eye, for all the
the limit on car performance right reasons. Who said they aren’t cool? You have a home charge
point. Don’t you? Well, get
1. PININFARINA BATTISTA BEST FOR TOWING HEAV Y STUFF one. There’s a grant, so it’ll
cost you less than £500. If
PRICE: £2m RANGE: 310 miles People only seem to talk about the BMW iX’s looks, you don’t have a driveway,
but not the fact that it can tow 2,500kg. Finally, an EV to get an overnight or all-
The ideal plaything for a billionaire with a private that can lug a massive caravan. And if it’s a problem day recharge check zap-
race track. Maybe a spot too fast for everyday use, you can put a sheet over the car once you get there. map.com for posts near
but you probably have another 10 cars on the drive. home or work that give
between 5kW and 7kW.
2. RIMAC NEVERA BEST FOR CHEAPSKATES Always make sure that
you know in advance the
PRICE: £1.7m RANGE: 340 miles Fancy driving the cheapest EV on the market? It supplier for the post you
might come with some trade-offs, mind. The Smart want to use, and register
Brain-scrambling performance from the Croatian EQ Fortwo coupe has a meagre 60-mile range from on its app or get its
entry, and £1.7m might be a lot, but it’s a bargain next its 17kWh battery, but it’s a relative snip at £20,725. dedicated RFID card.
to the Pininfarina Battista that nicked its underpinnings.
Rapid (DC) chargers,
3. PORSCHE TAYCAN BEST FOR PITSTOPS at a slightly higher price,
are best used for long trips,
PRICE: £72,850 RANGE: Up to 301 miles Could 640mph be an electric speed record? Well like you’d stop for fuel.
that’s how fast the Audi e-tron GT quattro can charge They take roughly as long
The entry level ‘affordable’ Taycan RWD is pick of at, even if it can’t drive that fast. All thanks to its spicy as filling with petrol and
the range – still a great powertrain and top notch 265kW charging rate and 3.1mpkWh efficiency rating. having a full English.
interior, but it’s more laid back and easy to live with.
In winter, keep plugged
4. TESLA MODEL 3 PERFORMANCE BEST FOR CARGO in until you drive away, as
pre-warming the battery
PRICE: £59,990 RANGE: 352 miles Not only does the XL version of the Citroen e-Berlingo and cabin increases range.
have seven seats inside (surprisingly there’s not too When possible, choose
Ignore all of the Tesla hype and what you’re left with many EVs with those), but it also has a stonking 3,500 heated/cooled seats over
is a solid car with impressive performance. Tesla’s litres of space inside with the seats folded down. cabin heating and aircon.
charge network means it isn’t just for early adopters. Try to drop your motorway
speed by 10mph: it’ll hugely
increase range, getting you
there far more quickly if it
avoids a recharging stop.

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BAFFLED BY ELECTRIC CAR JARGON?
YOUR GUIDE TO DECODING THE FUTURE IS HERE

EV Volts, amps plug. Fast or level 2 refers accurate than the old NEDC Supercapacitor
and Watts to the wall mounted AC standard, but still optimistic.
Let’s start with a simple one. charging boxes you can Supercapacitors can charge
EV means electric vehicle, as We’re going to go full science install in your house or office, Regen and discharge more quickly
opposed to one powered by teacher on you and use an which go up to 7.4kW on than regular batteries – good
petrol, diesel, used chip oil, analogy. Imagine a river: the normal 240V single phase Shorthand for ‘regenerative for bursts of speed – and can
Chanel No 5 or magic. Volts are how fast the river AC, or 22kW on industrial braking’. Electric motors work tolerate more charge and
flows, the amps are how three phase. Rapid or level 3 by using electricity and discharge cycles, but they’re
BEV much water is flowing, and is the high-power, DC supply, magnets to spin a shaft. So, still not as energy dense as
the Watts are how easily it’ll this is the sort you’ll find at if you were to spin it manually, batteries, so you’re unlikely
Must not be pronounced carry you downstream. motorway services and say, by coasting, you will then to see them as direct battery
‘Bev’, like your favourite lunch dedicated charging areas. generate electricity, because replacements. More likely
lady, but ‘B-E-V’. It stands for kW generators are basically to supplement a petrol
battery electric vehicle. As CHAdeMO motors operating the engine’s performance.
opposed to what... steam- Logical, metric countries use opposite way. See Lamborghini Sián.
fuelled? Just call them EVs kilowatt to measure power CHAdeMO is not the result
like everyone else. from petrol and diesel of a cat walking across a Range CCZ
engines. For the rest of us a keyboard. It’s basically the
ICE kilowatt is 1,000 Watts, and is fast charging standard How far you’ll get in your car The Congestion Charge
the most common measure Japan came up with. from the amount of energy Zone in London. From 7am
The internal combustion of power in an EV. A kilowatt Competing standards you put into it. So, it’s been to 10pm, it’s £15 to drive in this
engine. Confusingly, ICE is equal to about 1.34bhp. include CCS and Tesla fuel from a tank for most of zone. Used to be cheaper
can also stand for in-car Superchargers, which all your life, now it’s a battery. and apply over fewer hours,
entertainment (ie the stereo, kWh look reaaaaally similar. but it’s been ‘temporarily’
touchscreen and so on). Range anxiety hiked to cover post-COVID-19
Stands for kilowatt hours and CCS costs for the authorities. But,
PHEV can cut two ways – how much The fear of being very far with an electric car you can
power you’ve used (which The DC charger you’ll most from home, on a dark and pay a one-off £10 for an
Plug-in hybrid electric a utilities bill does), or how likely use across the UK and cold night, without enough exemption that lasts a year.
vehicle, or a hybrid with a much capacity there is in a Europe. Works in everything power to make it to a
bigger battery that you can battery. For instance, a Tesla from a Tesla to a VW. charging station. In the ULEZ
plug in to charge, giving you Model S has 100kWh of short term, the solution is
a short, say 20-mile, electric- capacity, of which you’ll Supercharging more rapid charge stations, The CCZ is there to ease
only range. Amazing tax- be able to use about 90, in the long term, better traffic; London’s Ultra Low
dodging mpg figures in the because fully depleting If it looks like a CCS charger energy density and more Emissons Zone is to ease
official tests, not so amazing a battery is a great way and works like a CCS charger, efficient cars should ease pollution. The ULEZ is in effect
in real life... unless you plug in to ruin it forever. it could very well be a Tesla our furrowed brows. every hour of every day, and
every night and use the car Supercharger. But you can’t will rain down with great
exclusively for short trips. AC and DC use it unless you’re in a Tesla. Li-ion vengeance and furious
application of a £12.50
MHEV AC stands for alternating mpkWh A contraction of lithium-ion, charge if you drive into
current, and DC stands for which refers to the chemical the zone in a petrol car
The mild hybrid EV, or MHEV, Batman comics... er, wait... Not content with the unholy make-up of a typical battery that doesn’t meet Euro 4
the very bottom rung of the direct current. AC’s better for union of litres of petrol and pack. The 12V brick used to standards or a diesel car
electrified vehicle ladder. A long-distance transmission, pints of milk, the UK’s uneasy start your petrol powered car that doesn’t meet Euro 6
small electric motor assists because it can easily be blend of metric and Rees- is a lead-acid battery, but standards. The good news
the engine, but doesn’t have transformed (to higher Mogg leaves us measuring lithium-ion is now the global is that full EVs are exempt.
enough gumption to push the voltage, lower current, EV economy in miles per norm for powering new EVs.
car on its own. MHEVs usually so fewer heat losses). kilowatt hour. So, if you have FCEV
manage a fuel saving of Transforming DC power 50 usable kWh, and run at Solid-state
about 10 per cent compared is a faff but, because DC 4.0mpkWh, you’ll do 200 miles battery Fuel cell electric vehicles, like
with a pure petrol car. charging stations can be as before you’re stranded. the Toyota Mirai. Separating
big as they need to be, they The next big step in battery hydrogen and oxygen takes
REX can employ high-voltage W LT P tech – holds more energy a lot of energy, but reuniting
power, giant transformers than an equivalent-sized them in just the right way
Refers to range extenders, and rectifiers and get huge Stands for Worldwide li-ion battery, or the same releases energy. You can
or small internal combustion power – up to 350kW. Harmonised Light Vehicle amount of energy but in burn hydrogen, but in a
engines used as generators Test Procedure. A way to test a smaller and lighter pack. hydrogen fuel cell you
to recharge EV batteries on Slow, fast and new cars to see how much They’re easier to cool, too, generate electricity to drive
the move. Engine can be rapid charging fuel, or energy, they use, how which means you can charge an electric motor. It’s also
run at its most efficient rpm, much greenhouse gas they them quicker before they get easier to move H2 over long
converting fuel to electricity, Slow or level 1 charging is expel, and how far they get too hot. At least five years distances than electricity.
which is fed to the motors when you use a regular wall on one tank/charge. More until any come to market.
that supply the motive force.

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