2013 Series Writing - Online Psychic

2013 SERIES WRITING





THE COIL

PART I: A VISIT BY GREY BEARD

PART II: A MISSED OPPORTUNITY





OUR SACRED BLOOD
PART I: REMEMBERING OUR SACRED BLOOD

PART II: THE FEMALE BODY, SEXUALITY, AND THE EARTH

PART III: THE REST OF THE BLOODY STORY

PART IV: A TRUE RITUAL – SHARING YOUR HEART AND BODY WITH

THE UNIVERSE



CONQUERING ILLUSIONS

PART I: THE MANIPULATABLE HUMAN MIND

PART II: THE LOST HUMAN GODS AND GODDESSES OF THE EARTH

PART III: THE WORLD TODAY, THE ILLUSIONS, AND HOW THIS

LEADS INTO THE TRUTH BEHIND THE SHADOW THAT LINGERS HERE


DEPRESSION AND THE MIND

PART I: INTRO TO DARK ENTITIES AND HOW TO HEAL

PART II: MY SELF HATRED AND MENTAL ILLNESS

PART III: MY RELATIONSHIP WITH DARK AND LIGHT ENTITIES

PART IV: TAKING ANTI-DEPRESSANTS AND WALKING THROUGH

TIME PORTALS








1

THE COIL





PART I: A VISIT BY GREY BEARD


POSTED ON MARCH 20, 2013 WRITTEN BY ABBEY NORMAL




So last night (early this morning), I was visited by Grey Beard and had


multiple dreams which are foggy, but I will share the very short bits I


can remember.





So in my dream state I was traveling at high speeds through outer


space. One thing I can tell you, as you develop a greater relationship


with your psychic mind and with the spiritual realms, you’ll start to


realize that traveling through outer space is fairly common. Anyway, I

was shown a spiral coming out of my feet, it was in the form of a coil


that was rotating so fast I can’t even begin to explain what the


sensation of the speed was. I was so taken aback by the speed that I


asked Grey Beard why I can’t visualize it being slower? He reminded


me that the speed of the coil determines the vibration. So, higher

speeds mean higher vibrations – going further into the ‘light,’ lower


speeds mean lower vibrations – going further into the ‘dark.’ He


continued to explain that I can use this coil to travel to different


realms and dimensions and he reminded me of a vision I had during a


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meditation. In this vision I saw myself walking through a house that


was so filled with purple light it was glowing. I walked through the


door and I felt my physical body become hot and suddenly I was

propelled through a spiral through outer space at immensely fast


speeds. I can’t begin to tell you where I went, one minute I’m seeing


my body flying through space, the next minute, the vision went


completely blank.





Anyway, this is the best I can remember from Grey Beard’s message.











































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THE COIL





PART II: A MISSED OPPORTUNITY


POSTED ON MARCH 21, 2013 WRITTEN BY ABBEY NORMAL




So last night, I was woken up several times by my three children who


share a bedroom with my fiance and I. My children are like little


spiritual alarm clocks for me, so when they start getting agitated in


their sleep, I know there is an energy that I need to pay attention

to. And last night, after retucking my son in, I layed back down and


connected with the universe. I went into a calm relaxed state (which


is easy to do in the middle of the night) and I allowed my body to take


over my mind and suddenly I was taken back to the coil


phenomenon. I decided to take this coil for a spin, if it was truly going

to take me somewhere, why not? So I directed my thoughts and


energy on turning the coil super fast. Before I could even get through


the intention, the coil was suddenly spinning unimaginably fast and I


was suddenly taken to a chart on a ‘wall’ which was really outer space


but somehow there was a projection of an image in front of me. This

image was everywhere my coil could take me. It was like looking at a


map of the Earth, except it was a star map and extremely bright


and full of intense pink colored star systems with maybe 100 actual


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circled dots at every possible location. I remember thinking this map


was strange as it seemed to not be a map of infinity but a map of a


finite number of locations within one giant region but not the totality

of everywhere / anywhere throughout all space and time. Regardless,


I was still curious to see where I could go with my coil and there were


so many locations I felt compelled to ask Grey Beard where I should


visit first. There was no response and the image faded and I fell


asleep.





One thing I am confident of, I will be getting to the bottom of this coil


phenomenon. Next time, I’m just going to pick a place and know that


whatever choice I make I have made exactly the right choice, as there

is truly no such thing as a ‘mistake’ or making the wrong choice. That


is all the human mind for you, and I’m certain that is the reason why


the image faded, because I wasn’t ready to go somewhere yet, or


perhaps it was because I wasn’t believing in myself to decide. The


universe will always honor your intentions, and my question for Grey

Beard to choose was enough to satisfy the reality that I had nowhere


to go at that particular time, or at least was not ready to go anywhere


by my own choosing.








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Moral of the story: Make a choice already, don’t allow anyone else to


make that choice for you, or you will miss out on opportunities. I will


be honest with you, I wish I could go back and try this again, but alas,

there is only moving forward, so I trust when the time is right, another


opportunity will present itself. Maybe in the exact way or maybe in


some other way, but one thing I do know, next time I will be ready to


make a choice!

















































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OUR SACRED BLOOD





PART I: REMEMBERING OUR SACRED BLOOD


POSTED ON MARCH 22, 2013 WRITTEN BY ABBEY NORMAL




I will begin Part I by telling you something that I’ve noticed, and what


I’ve noticed is that much of the ancient wisdom of the past has been


lost to time and lost to a dream that has become the corrupt world of


today; and yes, let’s be real, it’s pretty corrupt and horrifying.

Humanity has truly lost its connection with sacredness and its


connection with being natural.






So, on my quest for wisdom, I never thought I’d delve into the subject

of blood, but it’s happened. Before now, I had learned many things


about blood. Most of those things were about how blood was


contaminated and diseased, and how humanity can’t survive without


vaccines and blood transfusions and now we have AIDS and Hepatitis


and Flu shots. How strange it is to feel that blood can be so dirty and

yet we watch tribal people drinking blood on TV; we can watch as two


men cut their wrists and put them together and become blood


brothers, or flip the channel and be introduced to human beings who


actually think they are vampires who need to drink blood to sustain


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their life. Isn’t it amazing how TV tells us one thing and our education


tells us another and then human behavior tells us a whole new story?


So much doesn’t add up and so much is so inconsistent. I can’t

explain why blood became so of interest to me, but when it did, I


thought of these things and I had to discover truth.






I have found that the most accurate and enlightening way of finding

truth is to find it for yourself, to discover it through yourself. So I


chose to connect with the universe, to absorb information, expand my


mind, and become prepared for the most unexpected answers. And


that’s when my explorations of blood went to a strange and


unexpected place which I feel very compelled to share. So please be

prepared for the strange and unusual to come forth as it truly takes


going outside the box to discover what is most natural about being


human and being in oneness with the universe.





So, I will speak plainly and tell you, the first most important thing to


know about blood is that it’s sacred. It possesses the most sacred blue


print that is entirely you. Each and every human being is special and


we are all special because we are all uniquely created and uniquely

designed by the universe. The universe created a dream that became





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your physical self. There is nothing more special than to know that


you were uniquely designed and perfect in every way. I know that


saying that will probably create some back draft because there are

many human beings who will insist that not everybody was created


perfectly, or that we are not a perfect species. The one thing I can tell


you is that there are no coincidences and no mistakes ever made in


the universe. Everything is exactly as it’s meant to be and that our


physical forms are also connected to spiritual forms that are also

connected to the totality of everything that exists in both physical and


nonphysical worlds. Knowing this truth is the first step to


comprehending blood.





The next most important thing to know about blood is that it is made


up of living cells. Cells are like a community of tiny living beings that


possess a sacred purpose for sustaining life. Cells sustain the life of


their cell community, which in turn sustains blood life, which in turn


sustains human life, and you as a human sustain the life of the Earth

and the Universe – amazing, huh? Cells are also the sacred keepers of


your DNA strand – this DNA strand that is unlike any other DNA


strand in the entire universe. Cells are also communicators – cells can








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talk to one another. As you can see, cells are special little creatures


and we must honor them and their purpose for us.





Knowing these simple facts about blood was all I needed to take my


wisdom quest to a whole new level, which is exactly what I did and


exactly what happened when i decided to keep myself ’open’ on the


subject. Suddenly the universe spoke to me and I was seeing blood

everywhere. The ‘everywhere’ part started when I stumbled upon a few


Discovery Channel episodes about blood and blood rituals. Then you


get that man, Andrew Zimmerman, who will eat and drink anything,


sharing a drink of blood with us on TV, then, yes, I’m a woman, I got


my period, and then I cut my finger three times in one week. After the

third time I cut my finger, I watched the blood surface into a droplet


and I thought about all the thousands of cells, like tiny little treasure


boxes, holding onto my DNA, holding onto this memory that is me and


only me, just sitting there on top of my finger about to die soon, and


then a strange wind came over me and I was suddenly compelled to do

something strange. So I took my tiny drop of blood and snuk it outisde


to share it with the Earth. It just seemed to make sense. And as I


watched that tiny drop go into the soil, I felt a strange sense of golden


energy around me and this intesnse fulfillment in knowing that, even




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for this short moment, the Earth knew me in a more sacred way than


ever before. The Earth knew me through my blood and my exact


genetic blue print. And this is where my explorations of blood decided

to go, and when I went back inside, from this ever holy event, I noticed


something unexpected a even stranger. I saw , within my third eye


mind, an extremely tall man standing in my living room like a giant


statue, just staring at me. As though he was acknowledging what I


had just done. He had, what appeared to be a warrior type of outfit on.

He only stood there for, maybe a minute, and then he was gone.






So this is Part I, the beginning of a quest to understand blood and


then to understand blood in the context of a ritual. Say what you

want, but yes, it was a blood ritual. I had an intention, and it was to


share my being with the Earth and I had an action, and it was to give


my blood to the Earth and use my blood as a vessel to experience a


bonding sensation with the Earth, and then, the even stranger part


with the very tall man. But from that day forth, I started a whole new

chapter in my strange life which is exploring blood and what blood is


and my connection with the universe simply by sharing my blood with


it. So, for right now, this is all I can share in Part I. Hopefully you’ll


come back for Part II, which will be far more bizzare and interesting.




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OUR SACRED BLOOD





PART II: THE FEMALE BODY, SEXUALITY, AND THE EARTH


POSTED ON AUGUST 18, 2013 WRITTEN BY ABBEY NORMAL




Now that I’m delving into Part II, I’m realizing this could be a long


series of blood discussions. The below post I wrote several months ago


and it’s very centered around blood, the female body, sexuality, and


the Earth. I can’t always explain what possesses me when I write

certain things, but I seem to have been possessed by something when


I wrote this. So I will try not to alter the writing and just share it as it


is:





I’m sharing this post on blood as I deeply desire to revive our human

relationship with blood with the rituals of our ancient ancestors. I


can’t begin to tell you I’m an expert, but what I can tell you is that I


have a sacred history that I possess within my soul, and that history


desires to have a voice in today’s world where so much has been


forgotten. When we can reconnect our human bodies with what comes

most natural and what is then most sacred, we can start to free


ourselves from a world that has truly imprisoned us and led us astray


from our rightly heritage as living, breathing, organisms in the


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universe. Mankind deserves to take the power back and one way you


can empower yourself is by revitalizing your memories with the sacred


wisdom of blood.





I wish to share further insight into this, especially as I am a female


and feel that we as human beings have forgotten the sacred properties


of the female body and the sacredness of sex, which I feel has become

misguided and abused, deranged and vile in today’s world. Our bodies


we must remember are electric and when we engage in sexual activity,


it charges our blood, it heals our bodies, and it allows us to reach


extremely high spiritual vibrations which, orgasms truly take us to


God energy. The female body is most sacred of all, as within the core

of a woman is the most beautiful sacred womb where creation takes


place and where creation is developed and where creation is birthed


forth into this world. The female womb is literally like the universe


that births forth new planets and stars and like the universe the


female womb births forth new living breathing creations. Within this

sacred space is sacred blood. This blood is charged through sexual


acts. This blood is also freely let go each month a creation has not


taken place. What has been lost to time is that this sacred, charged


blood is healing for Mother Earth and healing for the female body. I




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can’t begin to express how important it is that this blood be given


back to the Earth. We have forgotten a time when mankind was most


natural and lived closely with the Earth. Mankind no longer lives in

this close, loving relationship with the Earth, in fact, mankind is


abusing the Earth as it is abusing the women of today.






Blood is our human heritage; it is our sacred blue print. Blood speaks

to us and it speaks to the universe. Our bodies are sacred and the


female body, as too the Earth, must be cherished once more to sustain


the life of man. When women can become empowered and release


their sacred blood to the Earth, a great and profound healing will take


place that will alter time and space as we human beings have come to

comprehend it.






From this point forth, I will share the voice of the Earth as it has been


spoken through me. It is time for a change. It is time for the

awakening of mankind. It is time for the gifts of the universe to be


shed once more upon us, that we may remember our sacred origins,


breath sacred air, and taste the sacred fruit. That we may become in


balance and suffer no more. That the blood of war no longer be shed,

but the blood of the sacred womb, may it take its place.





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This is where my voice ended several months ago. I took the final


paragraph and altered it into a poem as I thought it was too beautiful


not to be shared poetically. You can find it in my ‘Soul Stories and

Poems’ section. I will attempt to write a Part III which will share the


actions I have taken to comprehend blood in a more profound way. It


may seem strange, but I truly believe our connection to our blood is a


connection to us as a creation, and it can also be used as a tool in our


connection to the very universe itself. It may also seem strange, but I

truly believe women need to share their blood with the Earth once


more. There is a reason women go through a period, there is a reason


blood is shed during childbirth. If this blood is suddenly taken out of


context of our current reality and put into the context of an alternate


reality where women are natural and one with the Earth, suddenly

you start to see how blood is special food for the Earth and can have a


magical component to it. Women, Blood, and the Earth have a very


special relationship that needs to be remembered and redeveloped and


in so doing will change the course of our current timeline. I truly


believe this and I can’t emphasize this enough, women need to share

their blood with the Earth once more.











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OUR SACRED BLOOD





PART III: THE REST OF THE BLOODY STORY


POSTED ON AUGUST 22, 2013 WRITTEN BY ABBEY NORMAL




I think it’s time I followed through on my Part III. It’s strange and


weird, I know. I’m just about your most ordinary person and who


would ever have thought this regular girl does these strange things. I


sometimes do wonder about me but that is the mind at work and not

what truly possesses this body which is an ancient light that has


memories that date back to times and places long forgotten. I can


only be who I am and I can only follow my heart, even if my mind can’t


comprehend it.





So it began with a series of events that got me thinking about blood. I


believe I delved into this in Part I and I truly never know where I’m


going with anything I have to say, but it’s time I brought the truth full


circle. Once I placed my blood on the Earth that day I cut my finger,

and then the strange tall man appeared, I can’t deny that I felt


changed in some way. I felt my body change and my heart and soul


change. It’s something you can only feel it’s not something you can


fully describe. Sometimes I wish I could take my hands and place


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them upon the hands of others and share the truth through sharing


my memories and my feelings, but we are a race that interacts


through the spoken and written word and I have to do what I can to

share what I know between the boundaries of words – a very difficult


thing for me to do at times.






So from that day forward I had an ever growing thought in my mind. I

truly wanted to share a portion of blood, more than just a drop, but I


certainly wasn’t willing to cut myself to accomplish this and how else


could I get this blood to share with the Earth. That’s when a thought


quickly entered my mind. I know these thoughts are not from me but


from somewhere else as it entered even before I could finish my

thought. How strange thoughts are that answer thoughts can enter


even before we finish asking our question thought. But regardless,


the thought reminded me of what women do every month and how


there is no reason for me to hurt myself to share my blood with the


Earth; a thought that took less than a second and told me all of this.

And yes, it was a eureka moment, and I was ever prepared to do


something absolutely strange with the blood of my next period. So


men, don’t go getting all weirded out yet, the thing about a menstrual


cycle is that it’s all natural and totally normal and yes, you can trust




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something that bleeds for seven days and doesn’t die. And at my next


period, again, I was prepared to do something absolutely strange with


that blood.





Obviously a series of weeks passed and then the time came and yes, I


collected blood, I admit it, in a cup, and it was around 4 in the


morning, because strange things always happen around 4 in the

morning. I was very sneaky because I couldn’t possibly let anybody in


this house know what I was up to (they still don’t know). And I took


this cup of blood and I went outside with it and very quickly dumped


it on the Earth near our front door. I stood there for a few moments


and watched the blood just sitting at the top of the ground and it was

strange but all of a sudden, it disappeared into the Earth like the


Earth literally drank it. I didn’t know what to do or think, I was truly


in outer space and filled with excitement and wonder by what I had


just done and what that meant and I quickly went back into the


house, which is when I saw that tall man again. He stood there,

probably 7 feet tall and he had shoulder length wavy blonde hair and


seemed to be dressed in what I later would recognize from, Spartacus


Blood and Sand, something like a Roman soldier outfit. I still don’t


have an explanation for it, but it’s what I saw and I’ve seen this man




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many times since because I’ve been doing strange things with blood


ever since. I know now who he is better than I had at first, but I don’t


know that I’m prepared to talk about that as of yet, maybe when I’m

110 years old and about to die, but probably sooner than that.






This monthly blood sharing with the Earth later developed into a


desire to share my blood with all the elements, to share it with air,

water, earth, and fire. Each element I’ve shared blood with has a


distinctly different physical response. When I shared my blood with


fire, I actually felt a burning sensation inside of my body. Late one


night we were at a friend’s house and he had a fire going, it was so


strange, but I felt as though I was also the fire. Instead of just

observing and feeling the fire, I was the fire itself and I know that I will


always be fire because this element is remembered in my cells. My


cells and the fire have become one and each new cell is part of this


memory, it will forever be in my body. It’s the only way I can describe


it. Water has a very cleansing feeling to it, when I gave my blood to

the air, I was visited by a spirit who called herself the Goddess of the


Four Winds. She’s visited me several times since, even at times when I


didn’t share my blood with the air.








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The first time I shared my blood with the Earth, well, the second time I


guess, the time I just told you about, sneaking around the house and


out the front door, after the Earth drank my blood, the feeling I

experienced was this overwhelming sense of pain and agony, a deep


sadness. I felt as though there were things that lived inside of the


Earth that knew me now, that could find me, that saw me, because


this deposit was my name and origin, my birthright, it’s my entire


exact blue print in the universe. Anything connected with the Earth

was now also connected with me. I can’t say I felt particularly


comfortable with that, but I knew I was safe and protected and that


my body was only sharing the information it received from the Earth.





I have shared my blood with a very special place in Des Moines, Grey’s


Lake. Many people find this place special, but not everyone knows


just how special it is there. I can’t always put my finger on everything,


but there is a secret that lies there. It has spoken to me before and


I’ve been often drawn to the water itself. I’ve shared my blood with

that lake there so that I could uncover its secrets. That I did on the


most sacred day in Earth’s old and new history, the Last day of the


Mayan Calendar. Regardless of whether this day is correct or not, I


think the energy of humanity around this time made it very




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special. Day’s are only days, but when we share global energy,


suddenly these days are transforming. I wanted to use that energy in


sharing my blood with the Lake on this very special day on Earth. I

can’t begin to tell you that I felt something amazing, in fact, it was


quite frankly, horrible. It was so cold that day, and we had just


experienced a terrible snow storm. My blood that I carried all the way


from home and all the way to a special spot was nearly an ice cube by


the time I got there. It took what I would say was 20 minutes before I

felt anything. I think it took that long for the blood to dissolve and for


the lake to consume it because the lake too was frozen. When it hit


me, I was overwhelmed by this sensation of sickness. Extremely


nauseous feeling and I thought I was going to puke. I was dizzy and I


felt this overwhelming depressing encompass me. I felt so severely ill,

mentally and physically. It was not what I had expected at all. I don’t


have an explanation for why this happened but it did. Regardless, I


can now say my body is a part of Grey’s Lake and that land calls to


me. I can’t explain what it means but there is a spirit there that


knows about me and the energy there and the natural world there

knows me, my body and the body of this nature there are now the


same. I often feel a sadness, like a separation sadness when I have


not been there for a while. And since I have been working full time




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again and now working overtime I have absolutely no time for


anything at all, not even to go to Grey’s Lake and find healing in


nature. My heart aches to be there a lot of the time.





Anyway, I have to put my Part III of this series to a close. As you


know, I have life that is very possessive of me and my website doesn’t


get the attention I’d love to give it. Anyway, I hope whoever reads this

finds it enlightening and interesting.













































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OUR SACRED BLOOD





PART IV: A TRUE RITUAL – SHARING YOUR HEART AND BODY WITH


THE UNIVERSE

POSTED ON AUGUST 24, 2013 WRITTEN BY ABBEY NORMAL





One thing I never took mention of in my Blood Saga, which surprises


me now, is that I never went through what it is to be a part of a ‘ritual’


or part of what it is that I am doing, or why I’m doing it. This is about

sharing something and receiving something extraordinary, and doing


this in a most sacred way.





When you become a part of the universe, which is taking notice of how


you are alive like the tree and the flower and the bumble bee, taking


notice of how you are alive like the very stars and planets that exist in


space and how you are alive like the wind, the water, the fire, and the


Earth, suddenly you start to notice how you are a part of all creation

and thus a part of a great dream. When you can feel yourself


expanding and growing and becoming the very universe itself,


suddenly you realize that you are the master of your own world, the


master of all worlds, and that you are one with creation, one with the


creator, and you too are the creator.


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When human beings defile our very birthright by saying we are


viruses, we are imperfect, and basically that we need controlled, we


are transforming and degrading our dreams, belittling our dreams,

destroying our dreams for ourselves and dreams as a creation. We are


not viruses and we are not imperfect. We became this way because


our dream as a creation was somehow corrupted by a different dream


that become one with us. Regardless of how mankind got to where it


is today, it doesn’t matter, all that matters is that this place of hell

that we are all living in right now at this very moment, is exactly


where we are all meant to be and we are all in the very right place at


the very right time. Now let’s show the universe, show our human


history, show our birthright that we can take back what is ours which


is our connection with the universe and with our hearts and our blood

and purify ourselves and strengthen ourselves again, let’s become


mighty human beings again.






I share this because so few people even go there in their minds

today. There is something on TV to watch, there is Pizza Hut to order,


and we all just want to go to bed or drink ourselves wasted or just try


to manage this hell of a life as best we can in this imbalanced and


absolutely psychotic experience of life. I’m sorry, but this world is




24

completely deranged and confused. One thing I always used to say


while I was in college was that I felt like I was a blind person in a


world of confusion. How can I ever find truth or understanding or

even myself, find even love in this corrupted world that everyone


seems to believe in. It’s mass confusion and it needs changed, which


is what this ordinary girl is trying to do.





So, that being said, I will very quickly touch base on how you can


reconnect with the universe. You don’t have to share your blood or do


a crazy dance around a fire, all you have to do is share your heart. All


you have to do is connect with your inner most sacred dreams, go to


the natural world and tell the universe, tell all that is, was, and ever

will be, what your inner most sacred dream is. Feel that dream as


though it has a spirit and a breath and a life of it’s own. That your


dream has it’s very own existence, the same as you are existing, that it


is alive like you are alive. Watch as your dream become a part of all


the universe and know that your dream and your will and your

intentions are now a part of the very dream of the universe; the very


dream of creation and life and love itself. It’s that simple. It’s taking


your heart and will and sharing it in a natural place with all that is,


was, and ever will be. If you want to get real crazy with it, you can




25

share your tears with the earth; the Earth loves to know your heart


through your tears. You can share your saliva with the Earth, as we


all know – thank you Law and Order – saliva possesses your DNA as

well. You can seal your dreams with your tears and the DNA from


your saliva and share this as a gift to the Earth. When we give gifts


we receive gifts. The universe is all about balance. It’s not about you


give something and getting nothing in return. The Earth will desire to


give back to you in some amazing sacred way.





This is all I can tell you for now on rituals. So get the whole ‘ritual’


word out of your head now and know that what this is about, is doing


something completely natural, sharing your dreams with the universe,

and if it is your will, sharing a part of your body with the Earth and


knowing that you too are a part of creation and a creator as well and


that this sharing is also creating wonderful new dreams in your life.




















26

CONQUERING ILLUSIONS





PART I: THE MANIPULATABLE HUMAN MIND


POSTED ON OCTOBER 14, 2013 WRITTEN BY ABBEY NORMAL




It’s been a while since I’ve been able to develop anything on my


website. My whole world has become overrun by sickness and


overtime. I’ve taken one son to the Urgent Care only to come home to


my daughter throwing up, and then the next week I’m taking my

littlest one to the emergency room and over the course of these weeks


the whole house has become infested with sickness, and despite my ill


health I’ve been pushing extra hours at work and feeling nothing but


exhausted and tired. But this morning I actually woke up feeling alive


and well and it was strange because I was laughing about something

to myself and it was as if I hadn’t laughed about anything to myself in


way too long. See, if I’m talking to myself and giggling to myself, that is


a very good sign and here I’m writing on my website again and all


seems to be balancing back out in a way that I remember from a long


time ago, which would be like two weeks ago, which, I realize now was

actually three, but it only feels like two. This recall really doesn’t


surprise me, and is oddly the whole point of this story, which is about






27

the human mind and manipulation, even the sickness aspect bleeds


into the whole point of this story, so let’s get to it, shall we?





You ever notice how our human brains seem to have a memory span


of about two weeks? I don’t care what anybody says, yes, you may


remember back to when you were five, but I have found that our adult


minds have a vivid recall that lasts only about two weeks before we’ve

lost the full sensation of recent memories and are moving on to


something new, and we really don’t notice this or do we even care.


That’s why we are so good at forgetting terrible tragedies in the media


because they only last in our system for a short period of time before


we are distracted by something else. Isn’t that pathetic? The oil spill in

the Gulf is a wonderful example of this and I truly believe that oil spill


should have been enough for all human beings on the planet to


overthrow all government systems and bring the downfall of the oil


tycoons, but no, we got pissed, we You Tubed, we Facebooked and


then we went back to sleep again. In my day to day life, I bitch and

complain about speed cameras until I give up and just take notice of


making sure I’m driving the speed limit and now I hear that cops can


just pull you over for no reason at all, just to make sure you aren’t up


to anything. I’ve bitched and complained about this for a short period




28

and then become numb to my feelings of it and just go with it. Again,


isn’t that pathetic? We humans have become so pathetic, and I feel it’s


worse now than it ever was, so let’s start at the beginning and talk

about where this problem originates, this problem with our memory


span.






I start by pointing fingers at our televisions with a 1000 channels and

then our newspapers with 100 pages of meaningless information, and


yes, politics, war, and sports are all meaningless information. And


now You Tube and Facebook which makes everybody feel like they are


somebody with something important to share, and then the sex


industry which degrades our natural instinct as a man and woman,

our corporate world and pharmaceutical companies with all their


advertisements and miracle garbage, and then the bonus seller of


professional sports and all the electronics and fancy gadgets to


complete your tailgate experience, and then let’s throw in some


alcohol, tobacco, and pharmaceutical and non-pharmaceutical drugs,

and it all feeds into our fancy for drama and the way we live our


exciting lives in this advanced technological world which is really the


equivalent of a shit dump of toxins, garbage, meaningless junk, and


wastes of time and expression. Now doesn’t that seem to sum up the




29

problem with our brains? Because, let’s be real, our short memory


spans, attention spans, and choice to get angry and not do anything


about it, and then forget, is all based on this chaotic and wonderful

advancing technological world of bullshit we live in.






There is so much constantly going on all the time that nobody can


keep up with anything and it numbs our brains in the midst of our

busy chaotic lives, which leads me even more to the point of this story,


which again, is about the human mind and manipulation and why we


forget about great tragedy’s like the oil spill in the Gulf. And I truly


hope that what I’ve been conveying has hit a nerve of annoyance in


some of you because when we get annoyed and start insisting that

there is a balance to all of this, that feeling of annoyance is the first


ticket to the fact that you have been manipulated and don’t have a


fucking clue. Cause guess what, who doesn’t like to go to a football


game with their family, who doesn’t like an occasional beer, who


doesn’t like to relax and read the newspaper or feel that their military

life of protecting civilians was for a good and meaningful reason. Trust


me, I get it, I really, really do get it, because I live here too, but the


reality is, that this is all part of the ‘unreality’ and the real reality is


that human beings have really been reduced to cattle being herded by




30

some grander force that has a hunger for pain, agony, and misery


which human beings are expelling exponentially all day, every day.


This is where we have to cross a fine line and expand our minds so

that we can start to see the truth of the matter, which is much, much


harder to believe than what we live and breathe every day, our way of


life which is actually destroying the Earth and all human beings who


live here. But let’s ignore that fact because that’s what we do every


day, ignore the fact that we are destroying the Earth and the future of

all children and their children and their children and then the future


for all human beings on the planet because tailgating is a sweet ass


time.





Moving on, I’m going to expand this story to a new story which begins


with my mind, which keeps dwelling over and then dwelling over this


certain topic that we are discussing, and I try very hard not to write


about it, mainly because it falls into the conspiracy theory category


and I try very hard not to fall into categories. I hate falling into

categories because categories create imbalance, they create one side or


the other, yes or no, and all of this imbalance is the reason for all of


our human problems today. Everybody is always on one side of the


fence or another and nobody can agree on anything so we just take




31

the tide and go with the flow and forget about the oil spill and the


speed cameras or the nightmares that are constantly breaking out all


over the world so we can live our lives in harmony until the new thing

breaks out that we bitch about and then the flare dies down and we go


with the tide again so we can stay afloat in our own chaotic lives. So,


let’s slow down and back up a moment here because I’d like to ask


you a question which reverts back to your human mind and your


capacity to follow and keep track of information. Now, let’s start with

something easy, can you tell me about something that happened that


was so important in the media three weeks ago? Okay, simple enough.


I would tell you about the cops that can pull you over now without


rhyme or reason and it still pisses me off but, guess what, I’m not


doing anything about it so the information is only information that

has not changed the course of my future or anybody’s future and what


is really more important to me right now is just going to work, trying


to feel better, and trying to figure out what I will make for dinner


tonight. Can you tell me now about something that was so big and


important to you two years ago in the media? Can you even do it? And

if you have done it, can you tell me what this big horrible thing, that


meant something to you two years ago, can you tell me what it means


to you now? I have a fairly good feeling it hasn’t meant shit to you




32

because it probably took several minutes to even think of something


and now you can start to understand what I mean, because giant


tragedies are happening every day and nobody is changing the world

because all we can keep up with is going to work and figuring out


what we will do for dinner each night and all of this while our world is


being destroyed about our human minds are being easily manipulated


and controlled which is why nothing changes on this planet and only


gets worse and all of this is really starting to lead us into that topic

that brinks into the conspiracy theory world (pause, cause that was a


long sentence…okay begin) yes that very topic that I haven’t even


begun to tell you about and yet I have already begun proving a point,


about our pathetic human mind which is, unfortunately, where I leave


off (deep breath), so more to come later this week, and hopefully

sooner than that.



























33

CONQUERING ILLUSIONS





PART II: THE LOST HUMAN GODS AND GODDESSES OF THE EARTH


POSTED ON OCTOBER 15, 2013 WRITTEN BY ABBEY NORMAL




I suppose a Part II is in order, so enough of the funny business, the


name calling (pathetic humans) and the lists of examples (in short,


society today), let’s get to the nitty gritty of the real story that exists


here, the hardest story for us to see and even harder for us to

believe. Now again, I try hard not to delve into the conspiracy theory


category so I’m going to avoid it by telling you right now that I don’t


have a fucking clue what I’m talking about. Now that I have disproven


myself, I fall into the category of a bumbling fool, but you may


appreciate some elements of this bumbling fool’s young chaotic mind;

it may just be sharp and clever enough to open some doorway of


truth, to shed some light on the shadow that lingers over this planet


and has enslaved mankind of uncountable years.





So the real story as I see it. I’m going to start by telling you something


I’ve always known to be true in my heart. I have no proof of its


existence, but it’s always lingered there and I’ve sensed and felt it to


be true. Believe me or don’t believe me, but I’ve always felt as though


34

human beings were a magical species with extraordinary


capabilities. And when I say, extraordinary, I mean extraordinary,


capable of appearing and disappearing at will, traveling the

parameters of space through the use of the mind and creating whole


new universes with our sheer will and desire to dream of bigger and


better things. Furthermore, I have always related well to the Adam


and Eve type vision. I have always felt that human beings were one


with nature and one with their bodies in a way that humans never

needed to wear clothes or even feel ashamed by their nudity, that they


were as natural as the animals. This understanding of mankind has


been with me since I was a little child. As you can imagine, from this


view, it can be very difficult for me to relate to the world and even to


myself which has been dummied down to the equivalent of a goldfish

with a two week long memory span. I take walks on my breaks at


work and I walk the sky walks like a hamster in a cage. I go back to


my desk where I have been reduced to the capacity of a robot, a


nonhuman form, that processes and processes and processes until I’m


so exhausted that by the time I leave I don’t have much energy to

spare. I often have to take headache medicine because this job is so


unnatural to my eyes and my body that it physically hurts me. It


trains my form to adjust to sitting in chairs for extremely long periods




35

of time, staring at a computer screen which is very hard on my eyes


and doing absolutely nothing useful with my brain. Where has the


magic gone I wonder? And it really comes as no surprise to me as

twice as much time is spent working my job than is spent


sleeping. Four times as much time is spent at my job than is spent


with my children and I can’t even begin to tell you how much time is


spent at my job than is spent doing something I actually want to


do. What this basically means is that human beings are living for

somebody else’s cause and no longer our own. Whoa, I’m hearing it,


I’m feeling it, those thoughts that human beings need to go to work as


the structure of our society depends on it. That’s the problem, this is


a lie and the structure of society can always be changed and at the


rate we’re going, it HAS to be changed.





Don’t you ever wonder what happened to days where human beings


lived in small Earthy communities and where we worked together to


harvest all our own food, healed one another, and where we didn’t ask

money of each other, we shared with each other and took care of each


other. Don’t you ever wonder what happened to having days of


laughter and joy with your family and your community and where


people sang songs and danced and told stories that came from their




36

dreams and their hearts? The direction we are headed is taking us


further away from the true nature of our bodies which is to connect


with human beings with our hearts, to connect with the Earth with

our hearts, to breathe fresh air and drink fresh Earth water that is


clean and pure, and to laugh and dance and sing again. To fall in love


in ways that human beings seem to have forgotten about because


three men fucking one bitch is way hotter anymore. Don’t you see the


difference now between today and yesterday? We are not moving

forward, we are only moving behind and in the process we are


poisoning ourselves, our water, our air, our minds and we are all


miserable every fucking day, and for some reason this is convincing


and an okay standard for living which is why nothing changes and it


is only getting worse. And if you just so happen to fit into that

category where you aren’t miserable because you have a perfect life, I


guarantee something stresses you out and it’s probably money, or


politics, or your parents, or that bitch Irene. There is always


something in this world to piss us all off because we already have


enough to deal with as it is. We are all wound up, worn out, and our

bodies are decaying exponentially so we can all become slaves to


fucking medicine and if it’s not for a headache, it’s for the pain from


your new breast implants, or from your dick not functioning because




37

you did too much blow in your life, or let’s just say it’s the common


cold which everybody suffers from several months a year because our


water is toxic along with our air and let’s just take a flu shot to cure

us so the flu shot itself can make us sick. There is a local girl who


took the flu shot, it was a few years back when there was a scare of


some kind like bird flu, I can’t remember because my mind only has a


two week memory span. But anyway, it was a higher powered flu shot


that year and she went to get this flu shot and it had a reaction to her

nervous system and now she can’t even walk, for the rest of her


life. What truly are we putting into our bodies, you ever wonder?






And now that I’ve said all of this, let’s go back to my vision of what

human beings are; we are extraordinary Gods and Goddess of the


universe, beautiful and perfect in form, and connected with all of


existence in all realms and dimensions and in all space and time. Do


you see this the way I see it? It brings tears to my eyes to see how


human beings have been raped, defiled, and abused; manipulated

right under our noses, but I’m just a bumbling kid who doesn’t know


shit about anything. And human beings really are this pathetic and


stupid to allow cops to run the town so they can police the civilians


and do whatever the fuck they want, like speed through the speed




38

cams and not have to pay their ticket cause they are above the


law. This tiny little moment in my life erupts this rage and guess


what? It is a stupid thing to get mad about, because it is part of the

illusion. It is a setup, like a holographic image that is playing out in


my world and irritating the hell out of me and putting me in my place


which is right where the shadow wants me to be, stupid,


manipulatable, and expelling lots and lots of anger, rage, frustration,


and being exceptionally pathetic in the eyes of the Goddess I truly

am. Can’t you hear laughter in the background? I know I can. The


laughter that comes from the shadow that exists here, because the


funniest part about me getting mad about police, is that I’m settling


and doing shit about it, and all I’m doing is getting mad and frustrated


and allowing this type of activity to continue and to grow and to get

worse and to further imprison this Goddess into my cell of


frustration. How many of us can’t stand the fact that the only person


in the US that can become a president is some rich asshole who can


afford to advertise? No run of the mill Joe can be a US president and I


don’t give a shit what anybody says, have you ever seen a run of the

mill Joe become a US president? Exactly. How is it the only people


who know what’s best for all of us, the only people in the government


who know how to lead the lambs are the ones with all the fucking




39

money? And guess what, we all know the truth, we all know that yes,


this is the way of the world, but why aren’t we doing anything about


it?





“Why aren’t we doing anything about it”: Yes, this magical, magical


question…”Why aren’t we doing anything about it”: Yes, again, this


magical, magical question. It’s because we are pathetic,

manipulatable human beings. And by now, I hope you hate every time


I say that human beings are pathetic. I hope it drives you freaking


nuts to hear me call human being pathetic. Because that rage and


that frustration toward it is the true will of your natural origins


coming forward. It’s the song in your heart that speaks the truth to

you that human beings aren’t pathetic and that we are amazing


creations of the universe and that we are exceptional and poetic and


the God’s and Goddesses of the Earth.





But we have to stop here because it’s important that we don’t start


hating each other because the hierarchy of today’s society is all part of


the manipulation and imprisonment of mankind. It’s all about


separation, degradation, rape, abuse, and the standards of living. If

you have all the money, who gives a shit about the one’s who don’t





40

and the one’s who don’t are working their ass off to one day attain a


better life and nobody is correlating and relating to one another, all we


are doing is hating one another, starting senseless wars to give poor

people jobs in this country and all for the sake of the golden dollar


which nobody has but government assholes and beautiful fucking


celebrities. But that is where we stop because it’s the hierarchy that


has been created, it’s a manipulation, a hologram that creates hatred


between us and divides us all.





This is the point where we take a deep breath and we learn to accept


that we are all assholes and we are all screwed up and now that we


know this we are all suddenly the same and on the same level and

now that we are all the same we can take down our swords and our


battle gear and start to love one another and that is how we begin to


change the whole reality of the Earth today; that is how we begin to


win our battle against the shadow that has enslaved our kind for


uncountable generations. To win this battle, we have to learn how to

love and love exponentially. To see each other as equals because there


is no rich and no poor, there are only human beings. We have to learn


how to let go of all of our fears and angers and all of our shortcomings


and downfalls and let go of all the divisions and degradations, the rape




41

and the abuse and the manipulation of all of mankind. We have to let


all of this go and as we do this we start to go back to our old ways of


life, which is living in joy and peace and harmony and balance with

our community of friends and family; much like the Hobbits in the


Lord of the Rings.






Trust me, what you understand now as ‘fun’ doesn’t even compare to

what fun is when your heart is singing every day, when you don’t have


to go to work anymore to do some mindless, meaningless job, because


we are laughing and dancing and connecting with each other, and


suddenly you meet the most amazing person in the universe, and all


day, every day you get to make love to this person for the rest of your

life because that is what love is, a deep sexual connection where two


souls entwine and the universe rejoices in an ecstasy that your body


can feel and it’s such a delicious feeling you can never get enough of it


as you are surrounded by a beautiful organic garden that is Earth.





When nobody cries anymore the tears of sadness, when people only


cry tears of love and joy, this is the battle gear that wounds the


Shadow of the Earth. These are the memories the Shadow, the Great

Manipulator, wants us to forget. And the most amazing part about





42

this story is that the closer we get to letting go, and the closer we get


to living in this beautiful Earthy community, the further backward we


go and the closer we are getting to opening that old forgotten door to

our paradise past where we live and breathe as Gods and goddess


once more.






This is all I can say for right now, but I feel a Part III is in order as we

all need to have a comprehension of what ‘The Shadow’ is. This will


probably be the most difficult for me to share because it’s even harder


for me to explain. I am like a goldfish you know so expanding beyond


my parameters takes a great deal of time and thought, but I feel it’s


important to share as best as I have come to understand of it.


































43

CONQUERING ILLUSIONS





PART III: THE WORLD TODAY, THE ILLUSIONS, AND HOW THIS


LEADS INTO THE TRUTH BEHIND THE SHADOW THAT LINGERS HERE

POSTED ON OCTOBER 17, 2013 WRITTEN BY ABBEY NORMAL





Precursor: Okay, so I attempted, and yes attempted some more, to get


to the point of ‘The Shadow,’ but it’s a very wide spread discussion for


me and the hardest part, like I’ve been saying, is trying to depict

exactly what ‘The Shadow’ is. But below is what I started and ended


with and decided to call this A middle Part III, like a ‘Middle Earth’


Part III, and leading into a Part IV which would be like the


‘Destruction of Mordor’ Part IV, and I have no clue what that is

supposed to mean but I was thinking about the Lord of the Rings


while I was writing all of this so it just seemed to make sense.






Okay, so, Part III, the deep dark shadow, the shadow that is in and

around everything here and that goes right under our noses and keeps


us in our state of mental numbness. Yes this dark shadow…






Okay, so since I’m on a roll here, I might as well delve into this deep

dark shadow part of my series. I can’t deny this part is particularly



44

difficult to delve into. Maybe it’s because my simple goldfish mind


just wants to magically know the whole truth; to see it with my own


eyes and understand it in its entirety and complexity, like I could

watch the Lord of the Rings and learn the history of Middle Earth in a


three part series. I think all of us humans love to learn in this way, by


interacting with pictures and visual images. And perhaps the story of


the Lord of the Rings is very similar to the story of Earth except that


the Orks are an alien species and the ‘Eye of Sauron’ is, well, ‘The

Shadow’ that is very difficult for me to explain. It consumes the world;


it’s the energy itself here. It is the darkness that exists in all


things. Is it Alien? Is it spirit? I don’t know, but now I’m starting to


sound a lot like and old Christian priest, leading up to the point of


Revelation and suddenly throwing out images of demons and angels

and Heavens and Hells, so perhaps I should move back into the


tangible reality that is much easier to build from. Nope, can’t do


it. I’m talking about a shadow that nobody seems to notice to begin


with, so what tangible reality can I possibly go to?





I think the goal of this commentary is not to bring in religion, it’s not


to go all Sci-Fi on you, but at the same time, the reality is, it is all


these things; it’s the truth I’m trying to reveal, energy that exists




45

within my heart that tells me ‘yes’ and ‘no’ without explaining why,


and that is what I am trying to translate into written language from a


place where language doesn’t exist. I live each day seeing the reality of

the world. I live each day noticing how miserable we all are and yet we


all accept the reality we live in because it’s all we’ve ever


known. We’re used to it and we put our trust in assholes in politics


and rich corporate leaders to make the right decisions and when there


are devastating oil spills in the Gulf that progress for months, God

forbid any natural, instantaneous decisions to stop the oil from


spewing for months on end could be made because it’s much more


difficult to make the right decision and much easier to allow the


problems to continue, killing all animal life and eventually killing all


humans in the process. Don’t you see how accustomed we are to not

solving problems? Don’t you see how accustomed we are to allowing


more absurd destruction to come to the planet while remaining


completely and utterly numb to it all, as though we’re all saying, “Hey,


I’m just one little tiny person in a great big world and it’s not effecting


me any.” The problem is, billions of people are saying that exact same

thing and the worst of it is, this oil spill isn’t the worst of it!












46

I’d like to start now by asking a question, because it’s so easy to point


out the problems, but what about all those invisible people trying to


solve problems? Don’t they deserve a round of applause, and yes,

they truly do and I mean that from my heart because their intentions


are good, but unfortunately, if you haven’t noticed, all these problem


solvers have not solved a single problem, because look at the world


today. It is worse than it’s ever been and don’t even go there with me,


because guess what, we are all fucking miserable here and no, no

problems have been solved. And no amount of anybody trying to solve


the problems of the world are going to solve anything until we all can


start stepping completely and utterly away from society and the world


that is society today.





I’m going to pick out one topic, and I always think about women’s


suffrage when I think about legitimate differences that had a rhyme


and reason to be made but only ended up causing more problems in


the long run. The problem was always society itself, it wasn’t voting

because, guess what, voting is not real, government is not real,


politics, money, all of these things are not real, they were convincing


illusions that become physically manifested because we idiots all


agreed to them, but these dreams can be as easily destroyed as they




47

are created; so let’s get back to women’s suffrage. I know it only


started with voting, but it’s more than that, this is about women


becoming equal with men, equal in politics, equal in the workforce,

equal, even in sexuality. The reality is, nobody is free in this world,


nobody was ever free, there was never a such thing as equality, it was


always an illusion that created a division between women and


men. And now all we see today are women and men getting to vote


between one rich asshole and another rich asshole, thank you

women’s suffrage which really accomplished nothing. And if we want


to move into equality in the workforce, yeah, let’s go there, cause in


my young life, I’ve gotten to enjoy being a pregnant woman going to


work to support a family; I’ve gotten to enjoy having a newborn baby


and in six weeks getting dumped back into the workforce because I

can’t afford not to work. And I’ve gotten to enjoy being a breastfeeding,


working mother and instead of feeding my newborn baby, I got to


enjoy the reality that I’ve now been reduced to a cow, pumping out


milk in a back room, and putting it into a frozen storage so it can be


reheated and placed into a bottle for someone else to feed my baby

while I’m working. Don’t you see, there was once a time when it was


absurd for women to work, well guess what, I’m one woman who


would love to be supported by a man and get to be a woman




48

again. And I’m one woman who would love to see the men of the world


walking away from their useless desk jobs and connecting with women


again, and nature, and the Earth and the sensation and instinct to be

a protector, a real man. Money has now become the protector, not


gentle strong arms. And the further away from natural we get, the


closer to destruction we all are, and all of this is part of the


illusion. The world of today with all this money that we are all hungry


for, it’s all an illusion that separates us from our natural

instincts. I’m sorry, you women of the past, for all your suffering so


that we women can vote, but none of this suffering made any


difference, in fact, it has only made the problems worse. And now that


we have all this equality, we might as well have equal sex rights so


let’s just shoot down chivalry cause women can pay for themselves

now and give it up without men even having to try. This is the worst,


upon worst, circumstance for our natural instincts. Women are


supposed to be Goddesses and treated tenderly and sacredly by


men. When we women choose not to open up our bodies as sacred


flesh, when we just throw our ass out there and asked to get fucked

we aren’t being hot, or sexy, or ‘bad girls,’ we are being idiots, we are


confusing men from their natural instincts, and suddenly both sexes


are losing all rights as a sacred species. This is like pissing on the




49