Students Occupy Conservative Offices Representatives of AUSA force the Tory premises on West Mount Street to close in an action described by one party member as “deplorable.” News, Page 3 University Honours National Rugby Player 52 times capped scrum half, Chris Cusiter has been awarded an honourary degree by the University of Aberdeen News, Page 3 The Best Of Film, Music, And More The latest releases are reviewed, whilst our columnists have their say and we take a look at the university’s own Centre Stage production. Arts, pages 7-11 The Best Dressed On Campus We take a look at some of the stylish students around the university, as they try to mix warmth and practicality with fashion. Life and Style, 13 Inside this edition >>> FREE G WWW.GAUDIEONLINE.COM AUDIE The Aberdeen University Student Newspaper 6th December 2010 Est. 1934 Biffy Clyro take AECC by storm Aaron Murray watches the Scottish trio live Arts pages 8 and 9 On Saturday 27th of November Aberdeen Sports Village (ASV) suffered severe structural damage to the north end of the athletics hall. The damage is thought to have been caused by the recent adverse weather conditions. The subsequent closure of the building for a number of days raised concerns among students and customers about the health and safety standards of the building. ASV Business Development Manager, Kenny Gunnyeon, explained that, “a number of cladding panels blew off the north end of the athletics hall,” and consequently this “caused a pressure surge within the building which “sucked out” a number of the internal panels.” Although no staff members were in the area at the time it raises serious concerns about the structural safety of the building. In a recent health and safety assessment however, the facility was noted with abiding to good health and safety standards and concluded “[t] here is a good health and safety culture with staff recognising the importance of health and safety management and of their individual roles in ASV’s arrangements.” The contractors started work on a temporary solution to the damage and wooden panels were in place, covering the destructed areas. Mr. Gunnyeon explained that although there is no timeline for the repairs there will be an investigation towards the actual cause of the damage and if the was due to a construction error. As of Friday December 3rd all facilities were once again fully opened. Gunnyeon said that the ASV will make sure these kind of disruptions do not happen again in the future. Health and safety questioned as ASV closes Xander Brouwer King’s lawn is covered in snow as students emerge from the graduations Photo by Joseph Blythe
2 GAUDIE 6th December 2010 GAUDIE Editorial EDITORIAL TEAM Editors: John Braid, Joseph Blythe Head of Production and Photography: Leo Stockford News: Stuart Hewitt, Naomi Mills Opine: Jonathan Kerr Life & Style: Johanna Faust Arts: Anne-Claire Deseilligny Listings: Aaron Murray Sports: Ryan Ross Online: Michael Lockhart Copy editor: Emma Lowe Featured Columnists: Fanny Johansson, Eoin Smith, Xander Brouwer, Conor Riordan Advertising: Ross Brechin [email protected] EASY MEDIUM HARD SUDOKU We voluntarily adhere to the Press Complaints Commission Code of Conduct (http://www. pcc.org.uk/) and aim to provide a fair and balanced reporting of local, national and international affairs. Do YOU want to get involved with GAUDIE? We are looking for students with good work ethic and enthusiasm to pass the torch onto at the end of the academic year. This means training people NOW. At least 4 of our staff will be leaving in May as they reach the end of their university career, including our two editors, freeing up editorial positions. On top of this, we always need contributors to write, take photographs and generally help put the paper together. EDITORS; WRITERS; PHOTGRAPHERS; DESIGNERS [email protected] Whilst Robin Parker holds the title of Editor in Chief, he does so only for legal reasons, and has no input to the content of the newspaper. Get the tissues ready: this is the last Gaudie of 2010! I most of all am emotional about that fact, probably due to lack of sleep and prolonged exposure to the Gaudie computer screens. End of term means essay deadlines and that has certainly taken its toll on the volume of content in this fortnight’s paper. But if I hear one more time a student express surprise or disappointment that the paper is only a measly sixteen pages, I will lose another few valuable hairs on my ever balding head, as it is not I, or the other ten editorial staff, or the top contributors of this paper who are to blame, but those students who shied away from taking an hour out of their busy lives to write an article. Particularly disappointing is the lack of interest in writing for an opine section which gives every student a chance to have a rant about whatever they want, and god knows that, if ten or so students took the time to put into words what they were probably moaning on about at the pub at some point during the week, that section would be positively throbbing with content. Rather than moan on for hours, I will take the time to thank the people who did write an article or two for this edition, and to the editors who, as I write, still avoid their course work in the name of putting together the final Gaudie of the year. It’s hard to believe that the first half of the session is drawing to a close, but I am confident that the editorial team we have here is the best in my time at university, and we have enough young and promising journalists to ensure that the next few years are in safe hands. In this edition you will find the odd reference to snow, as you might expect in a fortnight when there is very little else to talk about. Personally, I find that the most difficult thing is affording sensible shoes to trek across the city in. As though Converse weren’t bad enough, Primark’s own £6 version must be one of the stupidest shoes a man can wear in heavy snow and ice. I end on a quick money saving suggestion, which I know many people have already adhered to: that is, take this paper, read it, keep it and wrap up presents to loved ones in it. Nothing says Merry Christmas like a pixellated picture and an unforgiveable typo. Have a great holiday and make your new year’s resolution to improve this poor deprived newspaper! JB Gaudie Editor Right now in your hands is free Christmas wrapping paper!
It’s that time of year again where someone drags us to the love/hate theatre performance that is ‘Panto!’ And Aberdeen has some real shows in store! His Majesty’s theatre performance of Sleeping Beauty is set to break a new record for Aberdeen Performing Arts. Its debut on the 4th of December has already made around £763,000 worth of sales. With a top-notch talented cast, including an appearance from Elaine C Smith it is set to see no sleeping beauty’s in the audience. The Lemon Tree, Aberdeen Arts Centre and HMT are al putting on a real festive display of Panto performances this Christmas so stock up on sweets and get prepared to play your part in shouting, “He’s behind you!” Aberdonian born International Rugby star, Chris Cusiter, was awarded an honorary degree by the University of Aberdeen on Friday the 26th of November. Chris Cusiter, born in 1982 In Aberdeen, has gained 52 Caps for Scotland and captained the side 8 times. There can be no doubting he is one of Scotland’s top sportsmen and the University paid homage to his achievements at their winter graduation ceremony. Chris’s scrum half career was established through his rugby success as a pupil at Robert Gordons College. Despite his sporting talent Cusiter pursued the sensible option of academia and went on to graduate with a law degree from Edinburgh University. Cusiter made his debut for Scotland back in 2004 at the Six Nations championship match against Wales in Cardiff. This turned out to be an excellent year when he went to on to score his first try in the second Test of the tour in Australia. As well as being renowned for his part in the Scottish team he has played with a number of clubs including Watsonians, Boroughmuir and Borders as well as making the team for the British and Irish Lions in 2005. 2007 saw Chris make a move to France where he signed with Perpignan team Stade Aime Giral for two years. On his return to Scotland he signed with Glasgow Warriors who he still plays with. Chris Cusiter, now 28, has gained 52 Caps for Scotland and captained the side 8 times. There can be no doubting he is one of Scotland’s top sportsmen. Not only does his recognition by the University mark his contribution to the sporting world but also to his commitment for the “pursuit of excellence.” Professor Stephen Logan, senior vice-principal, who delivered the laureation address, said: “We are not only celebrating his achievements in sport and his contribution to the development of rugby at all levels, but we also celebrate the enduring value of the pursuit of excellence which his career is an example of.”Chris added, “It’s really important to do something you are passionate about. If you are passionate and you work hard then you will get the best out of yourself.” After he was bestowed with his honorary degree of Doctor Honoris Causa, Chris mentioned how it would have been a proud day for his Father Stan, who died in July from prostate cancer, “It’s a really great day for me and my family. My dad would have loved to have been here. It has been a fantastic day – I’m really humbled by the experience.” News 6th December 2010 GAUDIE 3 [email protected] The curtain goes up for panto season! Naomi Mills Aberdeen students, including members of Aberdeen University Students Association, occupied the city’s Conservative party offices last week as part of a nation-wide day of action against government austerity measures. Around 20 students from the University and Aberdeen College forced the West Mount Street premises to close as they protested the coalition governments proposed tuition fee hike. A Conservative Party representative in the city described the action as “deplorable”. During the “teach-in”, students offered staff wine and mince pies, as well as “one-on-one economics lesson”. Student president Robin Parker and President for Education and Employability Megan McHaney both took part in the action which was carried out under the banner of the Aberdeen Defend Education Campaign. Mr Parker said: “It’s really important we recognise this is a UK-wide issue and that we have solidarity, not just with English universities, but also with the whole of the public sector and the ordinary people who are suffering from a financial crisis that was really caused by the bankers. “Yesterday we made some progress in terms of getting the message across that a lot of people think the economic policies of this government are completely misguided.” However, Aberdeen Tory group leader Councillor Alan Donnelly said office staff had been unfairly “ambushed”. He said: “I think it’s a bit rich picking on one party’s office when the last Labour government is to blame for this economic mess.” “Free speech and the right to demonstrate are the cornerstone of any democracy but that type of behavior is not on. I have got no problem with them protesting outside the office but occupying premises is deplorable.” A police spokeswoman said: “We were called to attend a commercial premises on West Mount Street, Aberdeen, at 9.41am where a demonstration by students was taking place. “Suitable advice was given to the students and no further police action was required.” The involvement of elected student representatives in the protest has caused anger among some students. Plans to occupy the Sabbatical officers office in the Butchart building have gained wide support and sparked lively debate on social networking website Facebook. The event, planned for Wednesday 8th December between 1.30pm6.30pm, has been billed as an ‘anti-NUS Occupation’ and has 23 confirmed attendees already. Aberdeen students occupy Tory party offices Stuart Hewitt Scotland’s greatest scrum half honoured Naomi Mills
www.latasca.co.uk Spain is closer than you think! feast like a king Lunch £10 until 5pm price per person Unlimited tapas from this menu. Monday and Tuesday Dinner £15 5–9pm price per person News 4 GAUDIE 6th December 2010 [email protected] The past months have witnessed the controversy of Aberdeen City Council’s plans to axe the city’s music service in a bid to make necessary cuts. Tuesday, 30th November witnessed the rallying of pupils, teachers and parents over their frustration. They presented a petition bearing over 3,260 signatures to the councilors as they braved the freezing cold. In the council’s report two days later their petition had been heard. Plans to close the city’s music school service had been shelved along with other controversial plans to end free personal care, increase primary school class sizes, hit drivers with a congestion charge and close Aberdeen’s public parks and toilets. Although the future of the city’s music tuition service looks more positive the nature of school music tuition is an ongoing battle. Senior councilor’s have plans to issue another report on the matter but stated that although likely to continue the predicted outcome will be for an increase in charges; with an exception for the poorest families. The councils finance convener Kevin Stewart said: “No one enters elected office to make cuts but unfortunately the depth of savings we are required to make in these extremely difficult economic times gives us no choice but to do so.” The city council’s ruling Liberal Democrat-SNP coalition has laid out a fiveyear programme of savings to eliminate the risk of becoming ‘bankrupt.’ The finance committee drafted a report including 178 options to which in total could rescue £71million. The recommendations will be made on the 15th of December to a meeting of all key elected members. Mr. Stewart went on to say, “We have got some extremely difficult decisions to make over the next few weeks and months. What I don’t want is for this council to reach the point of bankruptcy. “Everybody is going to suffer because of these budget cuts. No one in our society will remain untouched. “We must get through this and ensure that the most vulnerable are protected and that the city’s economy is protected.” Some of the other cuts proposed by the administration will see: Number of pupil-support assistant jobs halved, leading to 290 job losses. Withholding of £9million assumed to be needed to meet growing number of pupils with extra needs, raising fears that special-needs bases could close and 27 specialist teachers be made redundant. Hotels to be hit with a “bed tax” Parking charges to see an increase every two years Privatisation, or “mutualisation”, of entire council departments, including its finance and legal functions. On top of this the council has prospects for a further £43.5 million of cuts but the committee requested further information before making these final. The meeting on the 15th will help to determine the city of Aberdeen’s future. Music protests heard by council Naomi Mills
6th December 2010 GAUDIE Opine [email protected] 5 This past week has been absolutely glorious to me and anyone else who had been bored with local political developments and terrified by the impending humdrum of recession. Finally, something of international proportions to distract out attention! For me, as a Swiss citizen with a constant eye on the developments in my homeland, November 28th provided a familiar feeling. The Swiss people voted in favour of a right-wing referendum to implement a practice of automatic deportation for foreigners who commit crimes of violence, drug sale and social security fraud on Swiss ground. The atmosphere around this particular initiative, and the implications for the geopolitical attitudes of the Swiss populace that the results show, reminded me strongly of last year’s referendum to ban minarets, that was launched and campaigned by the same party, and that likewise garnered international condemnation as going against human rights and international law. Now, I don’t intend to deliberate too much on what I think of the initiative in itself (I’ll give you a clue- I voted in favour of the minaret ban last year). Rather, it is the message that it sends within the European community that I find fascinating. Switzerland has always been an island of political neutrality, keeping to itself and not getting sucked in much by European conflicts. Yet this initiative, coming only a few years after the Swiss government agreed to bilateral deals with the European Union, allowing freedom of movement, is not simply an avoidance of interaction- it is a deliberate withdrawal from interaction, a clear sign that the country has every intention of retracting within itself and leaving Europe to deal with its own problems. Recession? Not in our banks. Criminals? If they came from your country, you take them back. So the question we must be asking ourselves is not how many xenophobes does it take to screw in a clockwork mechanism- we need to ask ourselves what on earth happened to Europe to scare off a country that has always been the focal point of political compromise and progress. When the country that founded the Red Cross, hosts the United Nations, and makes the best damn chocolate in the world decides it’s time for some quiet time, maybe it’s time to stop for some introspection. There are a variety of issues that obviously come to mind. Not long ago we saw Sarkozy deport quite a large number of Roma from France. In Holland, Geert Wilders currently stands trial for incitement to hatred because of pointing out some of the more violent tracts of the Koran. In Germany, left-wing financier Thilo Sarrazin published a book a few months ago, denouncing the Turkish population of Germany for their failure to assimilate. Shortly afterwards, Angela Merkel echoed the sentiment by publicly declaring that the German multicultural assimilatory experiment of “Multikulti” had failed, and while she did not mention any group in particular, it is highly probable that she was talking about the Turkish population as well. Meanwhile, tensions run high even between central European states. German exasperation with Greece’s infrastructural situation despite repeated financial contributions, the correlated devaluation of the Euro, and now, just as Iceland manages to prop itself back up somehow and stay out of the continental headlines, the same thing happens to Ireland. The Italian government is still corrupt; Scandinavia is still very happily minding its own rise of xenophobic internal politics; here in Britain, some of the worst politicians to ever befoul Albion and Alba are going so far as to provoke violent riots. And as if that weren’t enough, the current wikileaks bombshell is sending international diplomacy into frenzy. My favourite revelations so far have been the American assessment of Russia as “a corrupt, autocratic kleptocracy centred on the leadership of Vladimir Putin, in which officials, oligarchs and organised crime are bound together to create a ‘virtual mafia state,’” the disturbingly homoerotic relationship between Berlusconi and Putin involving payoffs for energy deals in exchange for diplomatic support, and the fact that practically every country in the Middle East wants to nuke the hell out of Iran. So fair enough, there’s not much we can do to affect international diplomacy. But as far the European issues go, those that have scared Switzerland into hiding, there seems to be a common underlying theme. Everything, from Geert Wilders’ anti-Islamism to Sarrazin’s anti-Anatolianism to the economic shitstorms in Greece and Ireland to the budget cuts in Britain, comes down to two elements: naïve multiculturalism and naïve conservatism. Thinking that postenlightenment secular countries could maintain their standards of religious tolerance in the face of medieval middle-eastern fanaticism was naïve. Thinking that the problems in the economy were as easy as greedy people using social benefits to spend beyond their means was naïve. The result of the first is the presence of fundamentalist faith schools all over Britain, paid for by the taxpayers, that spit out children with a level of general knowledge entirely derived from a four-century year old book put together by an illiterate, paedophile shepherd, and an excuse for European governments to limit our freedoms by way of CCTV and things like the Patriot Act by playing on a fear of terrorism not quite unjustified given the general media image that certain communities give themselves. The result of the second act of naïveté was the acceptance of conservative economic policies, which caused, first of all, the economic recession in the United States through a severe lack of government intervention on banks, and much more painfully poignant to us, the election of politicians who put the ‘n’ back in ‘cuts’, slashing the backbone of British excellence, its universities. You know what? I think the Swiss are right. Let’s follow their example. First up for deportation – the Camerons. Political Round-up of the Week Elias Eiholzer-Silver
Have you ever been shuffling through your iPod, trying to find the perfect song to listen to, and nothing appeals? Have you ever got twenty seconds into the introduction of a track, before deciding that you would rather listen to something else, which in turn you only listen to for twenty seconds, and so on? I think most people of the iPod generation have the same experience once in a while, but this week I became quite nostalgic over how I used to enjoy music. At the age of fourteen, I was given a cd player and with it, my first cd (Travis, Good Feeling). This album is altogether unspectacular, but I listened to it hundreds of times, given that it was, at first, my only cd. This may sound a little bit sad, but I genuinely miss playing and over playing an album ad nauseam, until the only thing left to do is scrape the pennies together and head off to HMV to buy a desperately needed and much appreciated next album. It used to be so much harder to access music. I didn’t have my own computer, and would never have dared download from my parents’ one, and I didn’t have the money to do or buy much. Now that I have accumulated ten years’ worth of music from my own collection, friends and family, accessibility is hardly a problem. There is always so much choice on a computer or mp3 player that it becomes inherently difficult to actually want to listen to anything. Typically I end up listening to a mix of songs from various artists, which can still be good, but it lacks the same charm, and the end result is that you don’t have the same intimate knowledge of the bands and the albums that you used to. I wanted to buy The Strokes’ Is This It for weeks, possibly months, but never quite got round to it. I remember when I finally bought it; I ran straight to my room to put it in the player and listened to it on repeat, long into the small hours of the morning. That remains until this day one of my favourite albums from which I know all of the lyrics (or at least my own personalised version of them) all of the guitar solos and all of the drum fills. I may be getting too nostalgic and in a moment where new music doesn’t interest me that much and my ipod is broken, but I have vowed that my own new year’s resolution is to make an effort to regress back to how it used to be. Life without an ipod served me well and it’s worth trying to recapture the magic of music for myself again. Opine 6 GAUDIE 6th December 2010 [email protected] I yearn for the days when music was exciting Brad Majors © 2010 Deloitte LLP. Deloitte LLP is an equal opportunities employer. Find out where we could take you Join us in our Aberdeen office for a 2011 Autumn start and you’ll get one of the finest and fastest business educations around. Our large UK audit practice covers a wide range of industries and markets, from financial services in multinational corporations to smaller, owner-managed businesses. We will provide training and development programmes tailored to your needs, allowing you to work towards achieving your CA qualification. Visit www.deloitte.co.uk/graduates to find out more. It’s your future. How far will you take it? Dear Editor, February 2011 is National Heart Month and I am asking the people of Aberdeen to help British Heart Foundation (BHF) Scotland fight our biggest killer by organising a red event this February. It’s so easy to get involved with Red for Heart. You can join National Wear Red Day on Friday 25 February or choose your own fundraising event – anything goes as long as it’s red! All you need to do is order your free fundraising kit at bhf.org. uk/red or call 0845 241 0976. There’s never been a better time to get involved in Red for Heart, and join the BHF Scotland celebrations as the nation’s heart charity celebrates its 50th birthday in 2011. So please join us and be a part of Red for Heart this February - because together we can save the life you love. Best wishes Kathryn McIlwaine Fundraising Volunteer Manager, BHF Scotland PO Box 11532 HUNTLY AB54 6WZ Dear Editor, Today (Tuesday 30/11/10) members of AUSA occupied my office. Despite their calls for us to change our policy towards university finance, I can confirm that the Scottish Conservatives remain committed to not introducing tuition fees for Scottish Uniiversities. Yours sincerely, Stewart Whyte Scottish Conservative Scottish Parliamentary candidate Aberdeen South and North Kincardine Dear Editor, Your coverage of AUSA’s involvement in the student marches in London (22nd November) is very one-sided and fails to mention the events leading up to the protest. It was decided by the Executive Committee, including the president Robin Parker, that buses down to London would be booked at the expense of £3600, before Student Council had been consulted. This expense was charged to the Education Committee budget, which has been slashed by 20% since the last academic year. This was also done without the knowledge of Education Committee members, and it came as quite a shock to them during their second meeting of term to discover that 90% of their annual budget had been spent this way. At this point in time there were absolutely no reassurances that the money would be recouped from other sources within AUSA or the university. Alongside this revelation, it was also disclosed that only two of AUSA’s one hundred places on the buses had been booked by students. You also state that “AUSA’s involvement in the march was helped by a deal which allowed £5 coach tickets down to London to be secured.” Basic arithmetic would tell you that 100 tickets at £5 each would leave AUSA with a deficit of £3100. Surely this money could have better spent helping students up here in Aberdeen than allowing Student Council an oversubsidised jaunt down to London? I trust that you will publish this letter in full to allow all students of this university to see where their fees are going and how the Exec Committee can exploit their powers. Kind Regards. Letters to the Editors
6th December 2010 GAUDIE Arts [email protected] 7 Paranoid and existential angst The American DIRECTED BY: Anton Corbijn STARRING: George Clooney, Irina Björklund, Thekla Reuten Paranoia and existential angst are the key tenants of this understated thriller, which follows custom weapon maker Jack (George Clooney) from a brutal escape from assassination in Sweden to provincial Italy, attempting to survive and make sense of his life. Director Anton Corbijn keeps the pace positively glacial after the feverish introduction, imbuing every word and action with meaning. No movement is spare, and the cinema- tography and locations are as stunning as you could hope for. Jack is quickly por- trayed in an unsympathetic light, though throughout the film slowly redeems himself somewhat in the viewers’ eyes through his friendship with an elderly priest and his burgeoning relationship with prostitute Clara, played with a touching vulnerability by Violante Placido. After this the plot quickly degenerates into standard fare, with varying betrayals and paranoid episodes leading to the inevitable conclusion. In total the film is reliant on the performances of Clooney and Placido to carry it through, and thankfully they are up to the task. The sparse dialogue is slightly lacking in meaning, turning what could have been a taciturn thriller into an angst ridden drama. Thankfully, Herbert Grönemeyers fantastic scoring lends almost every scene a palpable sense of tension and dread. Even the most mundane of moments is given meaning by this undercurrent, always on the periphery, and never afraid to disap- pear and allow the Pinteresque pauses in dialogue to impact their full meaning. This is a beautiful film, but if you were ex- pecting nonstop action then it might be best not to bother. Ian Green The most important thing? I could be Justin Beiber.... This is our last issue of the semester, and thus you will find this section filled with the quasi-obligatory Christ- mas articles. We could have packed it with our summary of the best [insert what you will here] of the year, and in- deed we have yielded to a bit of that. We have also indulged in some mainstream pop, no doubt to the horror (or guilty delight) of some of you. The season demands it. But I think that Eoin and Fanny’s columns do a marve- lous job of reminding us of a few important things. I might have misread them com- pletely, but Fanny’s struck a chord, putting before my eyes the command to value the beautiful things of this world: carpe diem and all of that. Eoin’s complemented that by reminding me that even the smallest, most shameful of artistic pleasures is valuable. IF listening to Justin Bieber brings you one of those small moments of delight and hap- piness which we seek in the Arts, then good for you; by all means, keep on listening and don’t let us nosy people interfere with your quest for beauty. The romantic aspect of me might be getting carried away here, but it seems to me that more than searching for gifts for our families and friends, during Christmas, we should be seeking this beauty. Good- ness knows Aberdeen in win- ter can usually be a dreary place, but we have been bless- ed this time with a meteoro- logical phenomenon which has the virtue of transform- ing a dark town into an urban wonderland. How easy it is now to follow Fanny’s advice and see pretty and comforting things everywhere! The approach of the holi- days facilitates this also, as the rate of artistic releases is accelerated. You can laugh at a pantomime, cry at the cinema, savour the writing of a new book, and hide in your room, carried away by the dul- cet tones of Andrea Bocelli, Justin Bieber, Kanye West, or whatever else you want. I like to think that this is what Art is all about, this odyssey towards the ideal of Beauty. And in that quest, there is no shame to be had. I urge us all to look for it in everything around us, the snow-covered city, teenage popstars, cheesy films, and of course The Gaudie (ain’t we pretty?). So I would like to thank Eoin and Fanny for faithfully writing thought-provoking columns for every issue, as well as all the other writers, whether regular or not. I hope they will continue regaling us with their ideas about Art next semester, and that some of you will find it within your- selves to start doing so also. Equally, I beg you to forgive the ridiculous sentimentality of this article; seemingly that is what Christmas does to me. Enjoy your holidays, I hope they will bring much artistic happiness. Merry Christmas. Anne-Claire Deseilligny Arts Editor Editorial Arts Sub-Editors Art: Josh Lee Film: Molly Burlingame Games: Grant Collier Literature: Elias Eiholzer-SIlver Miscellaneous: Alex Downing Music: Jessica Cregg Theatre: Mhairi Parr
Biffy Clyro Aaron Murray at the AECC Press and Journal Arena 8 GAUDIE 6th December 2010 As their star continues on its blissful, vertigo-inducing ascent to rock heaven, hirsute Ayrshire trio Biffy Clyro have embarked on their new Only Revolutions tour around the UK. The first stop on this sold-out tour just so happened to be Aberdeen and I was very grateful to witness this incredible spectacle. Despite the fact that weather conditions outside the AECC arena were more akin to Siberia than Scotland, many young fans inexplicably braved the snow in cotton vest tops and T-shirts. To warm them up, Biffy provided two support acts – Holy State and the better-known The Futureheads. Holy State’s set proved to be forgettable and, for the most part, inaudible due to sound issues. Further insult was added when it appeared that their set was cut short to bring the superior Futureheads onstage. Floppy-haired frontman Barry Hyde’s charismatic vocals helped energise the crowd and set-closer ‘Hounds of Love’ prompted a raucous singalong. Half an hour after the applause had faded, the arena was plunged into darkness and excited screams erupted as a video of marching white silhouettes played across the gigantic screens. Several minutes later, Simon Neil and twins Ben and James Johnston sprinted onstage and smashed a proverbial champagne bottle of the tour’s hull with a fantastic rendition of The Captain. The snow outside was soon forgotten. You may be intrigued to know that Mr Neil no longer possesses the bleach blond hair/beard combo that once made him look like a tattooed Zeus. He debuted this unusual look at Reading and Leeds festivals in August but has since returned to his dark brown roots. In addition, the band stormed through most of the tracks from their latest album Only Revolutions during the first half of the 25-song set, leaving plenty of room for older material. In front of the backdrop of a huge shattered mirror surrounded by billowing white sails and red candle-lit curtains, the band played tracks like 57 from as far back as their 2002 album Blackened Sky. Given that the majority of those around me seemed to be 16 or 17 years old, this was perhaps a crafty attempt at plugging the old stuff yet delighting with the new. While the sonic riot of songs like There’s No Such Thing As Jaggy Snake and That Golden Rule sent the crowd into a frenzy, it was the quieter numbers that really shone brightest. Perched at the end of a platform projecting into the crowd and armed with nothing but an acoustic guitar, Simon Neil provided the concert’s chief Kleenex moment with a hauntingly beautiful performance of Folding Stars, along with sister track Machines from the band’s third album Puzzle. During the latter song, a massive chandelier of flickering light bulbs descended from the ceiling and encircled Neil like some kind of oversized divine halo. As if we didn’t know already that the man is an absolute god. The Revolution Has Begun Arts [email protected] Fanny Johansson Columnist Today I was walking through town, be- ing bombarded with the sight of big bellied Santa dolls and blinded by not only green, red, gold and silver but also orange, purple, pink and electric blue Christmas lights. All this did nothing whatsoever to enhance my Christmas mood. Then I got home, took off my shoes, lit some candles to heat up the room, and caught a glimpse of my feet in woollen socks, on a woollen blan- ket. And suddenly it was all there, the Christmas feel. I will take this as proof of the power of images. This antipathy for, and later affinity with the seasonal mood was brought on without the aid of good/ bad music, smells of cinnamon or taste of mince pies. This reminded me of try- ing to decorate our flat for a Christmas party last year with my flatmate – walk- ing around in Sainsbury’s debating the proper look to go for. Needless to say I had to give up my own preference in Christmas style as it mainly consists of handed down family decorations from years gone by, and a real Christmas tree. None of which were accessible as a stu- dent in Aberdeen. It seems that it doesn’t take a lot but it takes specifics to make me feel Christ- massy. As noted earlier all it took was the sight of woollen socks and a blan- ket to make me go all warm inside. I then spent an hour doing psychological ‘visual exposure’ tests on myself, look- ing through photos, going through my wardrobe, arranging random things in groups on various pieces of furniture to see what did the trick. Based on my careful, scientific study, here’s what makes me feel Christmassy: • Woollen socks, both knee-high ones with lace and red-and-blue ones made by my grandmother. • A mug of something steaming (can be just hot water, it works as well), next to a window through which you can see the snow outside, and preferably a street light. • Candles. All kinds, anywhere in the flat (yes, I tried many locations). • A photo of me and my siblings watch- ing TV in pyjamas. • A snow covered lantern next to the cross on my cousin’s grave. • The pile of logs next to the fireplace. With a fire in it, of course, otherwise it just feels like summer. Odd though that the logs do more than the fire itself… • Christmas lights in a clear glass vase. They’re more effective in a vase than hanging on the wall or around the win- dow for some reason. • Thinking of hyacinths and cinnamon sticks. • Winter boots with a bit of snow on them, standing in a little pool of melted snow in the bathtub. • Doing laundry. Although this may just have been because I was put in the mood by all the other things. • A photo of my car, outside my grand- parents’ house, covered in 15 inches of snow. The ultimate proof that no one has been to town in a few days. I did find it rather interesting that the piles of baubles in the cupboard, the mince pies and the pictures of Christ- mas trees did very little to get me in the mood. If someone has an explanation to the how’s and why’s of what makes people react in specific ways to various seasonal visual stimuli, I’d be fascinated to hear it. In anticipation of those rev- elations I will make myself some more hot water, light some more candles, sit by a window and introduce the audio element to this concoction in the form of Andrea Bocelli’s ‘Adeste Fideles’. The visuals of Christmas I’m cold. It’s the 1st of December and I’m clutching a steaming mug of hot chocolate having just cleared the driveway of snow using the world’s brightest orange shovel. My hands are at that stinging stage somewhere between being warm and frozen, my fingers are so swollen I’m struggling to type, and I can’t feel my toes. I am in a decidedly un-Christmassy mood. As I sit here sipping my chocolatey beverage, I check out the little package the postman dropped off a couple of hours earlier: a copy of 5 Cold Swings: The Fifth Kilau Kristmas Kompilation, available in Kilau on Little Belmont Street. Perhaps this will soften my Scrooge-like demeanour and put me in the festive mood? I’m doubtful, but I’m willing to give it a shot and so I reach towards my stereo… As soon as the first ethereal notes burst forth from my speakers, I knew that this was no ordinary Christmas album: no Slade, no Wizzard and certainly no Shakin’ Stevens in sight. Rather, it is a collection of eighteen of Aberdeen’s finest musicians presenting their take on the Christmas song. Packed full of folksy indie tunes, the album has a delightful DIY aesthetic throughout, from the artwork to the production, and proves to be the perfect antidote to the cancerous Christmas cheese that city-centre shops have been pounding us with over the last month. Although most of the songs here are originals, some familiar tunes do make an appearance including Ryan Simpson’s brilliant cover of the Beach Boys’ Little Saint Nick which nicely sets the mood for the following album. Meanwhile, Dusty Valentino’s smooth voice harks back to a bygone era populated by crooners as he glides through R. Alex Anderson’s Hawaiian masterpiece Mele Kalikimaka. Elsewhere, The Oxbow Lake Orchestra and Les Pelicans bring their distinctive sounds into the mix with Winter Blues and The Road is Frozen respectively, two pleasurable acoustic offerings which amble gently through the middle of the album while Seas, Starry soar through their instrumental composition, River for Joni. As with any compilation, 5 Cold Swings has its oddities, not least represented by Curry for Christmas, a brilliant festive offering from indie rockers Min Diesel which defies description, and rather strangely an affecting acoustic version of Sum 41’s Fat Lip from Huw Gurden. But unusual as they might seem, these tracks fit perfectly within the context of this seasonal outing; of the eighteen tracks included here, each and every one is deserving of its inclusion. So, empty mug in hand, I’m sitting in the warm confines of my bedroom, the CD on repeat. As I gaze out through the window, snowflakes daintily traverse their way through the air towards the frozen ground, Kitchen Cynics’ hauntingly beautiful arrangement of traditional ballad The Snow It Melts The Soonest capturing the serene beauty of the moment. And all of a sudden, it feels like Christmas. Kilau’s kreates Khristmas mood Eoin Smith Various Artists 5 Cold Swings: The Fifth Kilau Kristmas Kompilation “Packed full of folksy indie tunes, the album has a delightful DIY aesthetic throughout.”
‘The Promise’, set in the notorious winter of 1942 in Leningrad, was aptly complimented by the icy weather conditions of its second performance last Sunday night. The thick snow and biting wind simply added a romantic and pathetic fallacy to the production. Fortunately for Centre Stage theatre society, the basic and drab setting for their play was an asset and really added to the mood of the audience. Lika, a fifteen-year old temporary war orphan is hiding in an abandoned flat in the city trying to live on two bread coupons a month. Marat is a seventeenyear old orphan also who returns to his flat after the last of his family dies just because he has nowhere else to go. He finds Lika there who had burnt all his photos and furniture in an attempt to stay warm. A passionate relationship develops between them but as it climaxes into their first kiss, in stumbles Leonidik, a fever-struck, frostbitten boy, complicating their budding love affair. They spend the winter of 1942 together, innocently sharing their hopes and dreams, as young people like to do, more enthralled with one another than concerned by their lack of food. Troubles arise however as Lika becomes more annoyed by Marat’s penchant for lying and Marat cannot face his jealousy for the intimate and easy bond that Lika develops with Leonidik. The tension results in Marat leaving for the army followed soon after by the dutiful Leonidik. The lasting friendship and passionate love triangle remains strong even years after the war and leads to Lika having to choose her lover. Fast forward fifteen years and she and her chosen husband live a spiceless, dull life. They reminisce on the hopes and dreams they shared in the winter of 1942 and wonder where it all went wrong. Meanwhile, one of the dear friends schemes to bring their youthful spirit back to life. The actors were in general well suited to their parts. Lika moved beautifully on the stage. She acted in a classical style that worked well with Leonidik but clashed with Marat’s down to earth style. Their passionate relationship was hindered because it seemed that the two were in different worlds, due to their acting styles that made me cringe at their intimate embrace. For me Leonidik was superb. His acting was virtuoso and added humour, presence and I suspect one or two impromptu lines. The relationship between Marat and Leonidik demonstrated the best chemistry, timing and was the most realistic. Overall the production was professional despite the distraction of the lighting technician who at several points, let out a burst of laughter unjustified by any intended humour from the play. 6th December 2010 GAUDIE 9 Centre stage keeps ‘The Promise’ alive SIMON NEIL: blasting through “Bubbles”, and everything else Photo: Aaron Murray The Setlist 1. The Captain 2. Booooom, Blast & Ruin 3. 57 4. Bubbles 5. Born On A Horse 6. God & Satan 7. Whorses 8. Joy. Discovery. Invention 9. Liberate The Illiterate / A Mong Among Mingers 10. That Golden Rule 11. Living Is A Problem Because Everything Dies 12. Shock Swhock 13. 9/15ths 14. Folding Stars 15. Diary Of Always 16. Machines 17. Who’s Got A Match? 18. Saturday Superhouse 19. Know Your Quarry 20. There’s No Such Thing As A Jaggy Snake 21. Many Of Horror Encore 22. Glitter and Trauma 23. Justboy 24. As Dust Dances 25. Mountains [email protected] Arts What does your music taste say about you? Are you loud and brash? Or timid and quiet? There are plenty of websites that claim to be able to analyse your Last.fm account or iTunes library and tell you all about yourself; intri- cacies about your personality that you might otherwise have missed. But are their claims founded in any kind of truth? The short an- swer is no. Your taste in music evolves throughout your life: it runs deep within your veins and cours- es through you, shaped by your experiences and encounters in life. There are certain gen- res and bands that have greater significance than others; those that make the hairs stand straight on the back of your neck, and those that make you reach for a box of tissues. Here are some of mine… The first CD I ever remember owning was - wait for it! - an S Club 7 album. As shocking as that may seem to those who know me now, back in 1999 S Club 7 were undoubtedly my favourite ‘band’ in the entire universe. Oh how times have changed! At that age, the fact that they were a manufactured pop group didn’t matter to me. All I cared about was that they sang catchy songs that I loved to listen to. In a way, that aspect of my music taste hasn’t changed: I’m still a sucker for catchy hooks and riffs that draw me into a song or an album. Some of my favourite bands today - bands like Muse, Biffy Clyro, Foxy Shazam, The Dark- ness, Wheatus - have an incredible ability to write songs that are simply impossible for me to get out of my head. At the age of 16, despondent at failing to get tickets for a sold-out Travis gig, my friend Rus- sell and I decided to wait outside the back of the Music Hall, in the cold, on the off-chance of meeting the band. As it turned out, our 3-or-so hours of shadily hanging around be- side the tour bus paid off, as not only did we meet the guys, but they also got us into the show! Now, whenever I hear a Travis song, I am reminded of that fantastic day. There are so many more bands than these two that hold a special place in my heart for a multitude of reasons: I remember sitting lis- tening to LPs of ‘Phantom of the Opera’ with my dad when I was wee, sitting listening to the Rat Pack with my grandparents, and laughing as my mum rocked out in the car to the White Stripes in front of my friends. Don’t look back in anger Eoin Smith Winter’s Tales Ian Green It is too cold and too snowy to spend too much of the day tramping around the slush and ice. For the sake of your health it seems vital to retire somewhere warm with a nice book for some respite. As far as locations go, few can surpass ‘Books and Beans’ on Belmont Street. Finagle yourself a lovely seat amongst the many second hand books for sale upstairs with a nice hot drink (and maybe a snack) and happily let the day disappear. Equally superb for passing the frozen hours is ‘Kilau’ on Lit- tle Belmont Street, resplendent with comfortable chairs, high windows, hot crepes, and good music. On campus the Taylor library is always far too warm to be conducive to study, but just about right for some light reading. Alfie’s café in the old games hall of Butchart has so many beanbags it is practically criminal to let them go to waste, and cheap tea to boot. Now that the locale is settled, the only question is what to read? Christmas (nay, Winter!) is a time of indulgence, so per- haps its time to put away those hefty tomes you’ve been strug- gling with and allow yourself the literary equivalent of a hot chocolate and a comfortable chair. The Harry Potter series is always a good festive fallback, with little effort required rela- tive to the comfort attained (Harry Potter can in this regard be equated to Swallows and Amazons, Famous Five etc). Perhaps some Pratchett or Roald Dahl is your thing, or may- be this is an excuse to dig out dear old Bridget Jones and her kin. Detective novels (Ian Rankin especially) can provide just the right mix of intrigue and nonchalance to maintain your attention as the darkness draws in. Whichever way your favour falls, light entertainment is the order of the day (as your mind will doubtless be sluggish from the early onslaught of festive food). Happy reading! Sophie Pigot Theatre The Promise CENTRE STAGE The Blue Lamp
Elias Eiholzer-Silver And once again, ‘tis the season of good cheer, when Americans celebrate what they think to be the birth of an Armenian carpenter, and everyone else uses as an excuse buy their girlfriends a very revealing red negligée, usually with a fake white boa to complete the look. While I admit that the notion of Christmas holds very little appeal to me directly, I do enjoy it for two things- the eggnog, and the plethora of either hilarious or awesome holiday-based commercial goods that emerge every year. Be it the holiday special from a TV show, a cheesy, overplayed holiday film, or a record company trying to capitalize on the naïveté of consumers, over the past I have come across some truly remarkable examples of creativity, inventiveness, bad taste, and just plain pathetic stupidity. 5. It’s A Wonderful Life The Frank Capra classic comes in at number 5, just within the realm of relevance for the holiday, and not quite yet into the “do you want a bottle of rosé to go with that?” category. Sure, it’s probably the most overplayed and overhyped Christmas film ever, and whenever I hear that kid talk about bells and angels and wings I want to punch the screen, but at the end of the day, it really isn’t that bad a film. If you watch it in July, you won’t feel like a tool. 4. Twisted Sister – A Twisted Christmas Ok, so the idea of mean, crossdressing rockers recording a Christmas album is funny by itself. What makes this album worth the purchase, though, is the fact that Twisted Sister rock out no matter what they play, and this is no exception. It doesn’t even sound like a Christmas album, unless Dee Snider sounding like he’s mocking every instant of it counts. Get drunk and blast this at a party, and there is no way you will feel like a tool. 3. South Park’s Christmas Specials While I’m not usually that big a fan of South Park, their Christmas specials have always been a source of wonderful blasphemous hilarity. Whether it’s Jesus and Santa having a showdown over what the true meaning of the holiday is, or Al Qaida kidnapping Santa until Jesus shows up, guns a-blazing, to rescue him, or a speech endowed excrement bringing faecal Christmassy miracles to South Park, one can always rely on Stone and Parker to do what they do best, and take the absolute piss out of anything. My personal favourite involves woodland critters attempting to summon the antichrist, and I’ve never felt like a tool at all. 2. We Wish You A Metal Xmas And A Headbanging New Year Now, I know that Heavy Metal isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. I know that many of you find it utterly inconceivable as to how anyone would enjoy to be pummelled with aggression and testosterone by their loudspeakers. I also know that the lack of ability to appreciate what is objectively awesome by some does not detract from that awesomeness at all, which is why this compilation album comes in second place as being the least tool-inspiring Christmas product. I mean, hell, it’s got Alice Cooper, Lemmy, John 5, Dave Grohl, and even goddamn Ronnie James Dio. And they’re playing Christmas tunes. And it sounds amazing. Of special note is the Girlschool version of Auld Lang Syne. 1. Anything Trans-Siberian Orchestra have ever done At number one comes the most epic and unbelievably cool Christmas-themed piece of media to ever grace the earth. An off-shoot of 1980’s rock band Savatage, Trans-Siberian Orchestra is basically Christmas carols and classical music being played by an orchestra (duh) and a rock band. Taking the best of both worlds, the music is so gnarly you forget that it’s actually about such a lame topic as Christmas, and dramatic crescendos abound with electric guitars and huge string sections being just as damn cool as anything I’ve ever heard. Not only will this not make you feel like a tool- it will increase your dopamine levels exponentially. Arts 10 GAUDIE 6th December 2010 [email protected] The top 5 christmas products (That Don’t Make You Feel Like A Tool When Consuming Them). Justin case you were wondering... Justin Bieber My Worlds Collection Ian Green This is about as good as you might think for an album whose title is miss- ing an apostrophe. This collection com- prises of songs from My World and My World 2.0, as well as acoustic versions of his biggest hits and one new song (Pray). As far as these things go, one thing that couldn’t be faulted is the production level. Every song is produced to within an inch of its life, each guitar chord or bass loop perfectly planned to work its way into the minds of children and sim- pletons. The lyrics are sub-standard R and B fare, toned down perhaps to target a younger audience but the same nonsense that could be found on any Usher/ Taio Cruz/generic artist’s album for the last ten or fifteen years. This is most ap- parent on the acoustic numbers, where the lyrical simplicity of the songs is laid bare without the usual distractions pro- vided by well practiced producers. Bieber can sing, but the fact is he is an entertainer groomed for big lights and large audiences. Nonetheless, this col- lection will surely sell ludicrously well. It is vital to remember that playing two chords on your guitar and looking wist- ful does not a troubadour make. The lyrics are what rankle again and again, and in paring down the sexual references and occasional swearing of ‘grown-up’ R and B (if there is such a thing…) they seem to replace them with sickly sweet sentiment and slang which surely nobody actually uses. If you are looking for a nice acoustic set of songs, rather than typing ‘Justin Bie- ber’ acoustic into Youtube, try replacing Bieber with ‘Bon Iver’, ‘Bob Dylan’, ‘Bro- ken Social Scene’, ‘Brand New’, ‘David Bowie’, ‘Belle and Sebastian’- and those are just a few of the B’s… Kanye West My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy Ross Sutherland After last year’s now infamous “Imma let you fin- ish” incident with teen pop princess Taylor Swift, the biggest ego in mainstream music seemed to realise he should maybe pipe down for a bit. After months off the radar it’s evident he’s been putting his time out the spotlight to good use, with the release of his latest piece of work this autumn. My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy encompass- es the best elements from Kanye’s back catalogue such as Late Registration’s hook-laden production and previous effort 808s and Heartbreak’s vulner- ability and lyrical portrayal of a tortured soul to result in a piece of art that deserves the attention currently being lavished upon it. Enlisting a host of acclaimed guests to help out (including rap be- hemoth Jay-Z, comedian Chris Rock and even Jus- tin Vernon of Bon Iver fame) Kanye keeps strong company to assist in what is quite possibly the most groundbreaking release in mainstream hip hop this year. Highlights include the minimalist ‘Runaway’, which, with its genuinely gorgeous melodies and bleak, heartfelt but witty rhymes makes for a com- pelling listen. The usually abysmal Nicki Minaj delivers a show stealing verse in ‘Monster’, which is an anthemic addition to the album with its in- fectious production and attitude-laden lyrics. Mimicking the vocal melody of Black Sabbath’s ‘Iron Man’ on ‘Hell of a Life’, the listener is treat- ed to an insight into Kanye’s perverse and devi- ant sexual fantasies. Featuring the line “No more drugs for me, pussy and religion is all I need” in the chorus and with a bassline as filthy as its lyri- cal content, the whole song is enough to make even the most promiscuous listener blush. Kanye’s fatally skewed sense of self worth is something that should really detract from the album, but thankfully Mr.West’s frighteningly large ego, combined with a genuine aspiration to become the world’s greatest artist translates mu- sically into a fantastic album that even hip hop purists and those who normally scoff at the genre would be able to appreciate. (No teen sensations were interrupted during the composition of this review). Kanye really do it again?
ww Spotlight Aberdeen Santa Run Sunday 12th December @ 1pm Pittodrie Stadium The famous annual Santa run returns to Pittodrie. 6K run along Aberdeen’s balmy beachfront, followed by a lap of honour round the stadium. All competitors receive a Santa suit as part of the £15 registration fee. International Hug A Stressed Uni Student Day Tuesday 14th December until midnight Everywhere Show some love and support for your sleep-deprived friends. AUSA Charities Fashion Show Wednesday 15th December @ 7.30pm Liquid The seventh annual Aberdeen Student Charity Campaign Fashion Show. All proceeds raised go towards forty-four different charities. Tickets available from Butchart reception, price £6. Admit it, you know you want to see AUSA Sports President Drew Leitch giving his best ‘blue steel’ look on the catwalk. Peter Andre Thursday 16th December @ 6.30pm AECC Arena The biggest star in the world (FACT) returns to our humble city for a virtuoso performance of his hit single Mysterious Girl. Tickets are a non-pleb price of £25-£30. We are not worthy of his mancleavage. Christmas Societies Events Law Mooting Society Christmas Ceilidh Elphinstone Hall, Kings College Thursday 9th December @ 8pm Tickets cost £9 and include a free drink on arrival. AU Christian Union Carol Service Kings Community Church Friday 10th December @ 7pm In association with RGU Christian Union. Free mince pies! History of Art Society Christmas Drinks The Athenaeum Friday 10th December @ 7pm Last social event of the year. Revelation Rock Gospel Choir Christmas Concert Saturday 11th December @ 7.30pm MacRobert Lecture Theatre Sing, dance and clap your hands along to Christmassy tunes at this free concert. Childreach International Christmas Music & Comedy ExEv-aganza! Sunday 12th December @ 8pm Tunnels, Carnegie Brae Christmas-themed fundraiser with live music & comedy, a raffle and some extra special surprises. All proceeds go to Expedition Everest. Marrow/Friends of MSF Merry Christmas Party Tuesday 14th December @ 9.30pm Korova Klub Snow, fancy dress and prizes, along with a special guest appearance from Santa. AU Royal Naval Unit Xmas Party Wednesday 15th December @ 7pm Gordon Barracks Theme - Heroes and Villains. Prizes for best dressed. Comedy Society Funnukah Thursday 16th December @ 8.30pm Cafe Drummonds Puntastic yet non-religious evening of stand-up comedy. Tickets £2 in advance and £3 on door. Intellectual Pursuits Cafe Controversial: Boy or Girl - You Choose Satrosphere Science Centre Monday 13th December @ 7pm Professor Neva Haites, Head of College of Life Sciences and Medicine at our University discusses the ethics of choosing a child’s gender in a test tube. Aberdeen Art Gallery - The 2000s Aberdeen Art Gallery Wednesday 15th December @ 12.30pm Curator Olga Ferguson talks about the most recent developments in the gallery’s 125 year history. Free entry. Monday 10am - Planet Hazel 12pm – ASR Daily Show with Aylissa & Nat 2pm – Eoin and Emma’s Mixtape 4pm - Mellow Magic 5pm - Alex and Janaka’s Champion Vibes 6pm - Och Aye Choons 7pm - ASR Official Gig Guide 9pm – AU Electro Propaganda Tuesday 10am - Marcia 11am - Rio 12pm - ASR Daily Show with Michael & John 2pm - That European Guy 3pm - Meg’s Moments 4pm - Gary Marshall 5pm - Electronic Battle Weapons 6pm - TA’s Americana Shindig 7pm - SRA- Super Randy Ashleigh 8pm - Punk’s Not Dead Yet! 9pm - The Thomas Show Wednesday 10am - Day Release 11am - The Fever 12pm - ASR Daily Show with Rikki & Michael 2pm - The MJ Show 3pm - THE GAUDIE SHOW 4pm - The Steel Mill 5pm - Mr Mojo Risin 7pm - ASRock! 8pm - Possible Spoilers 9pm - Mosh On The Radio Thursday 10am - Alphabetti Spaghetti 11am - Save It For The Radio 12pm - ASR Daily Show with Reuben 2pm - Shifty Rocker 4pm - Rikki and Holly Show 6pm - Grill The President 7pm - Aylissa’s Remix Show 8pm - Euan’s Awesome Show of Doom 10pm - Nightmare at 20,000 Feet Friday 10am - Post-Apocalyptic Boogie 11am - Patchwork Radio 12pm - ASR Daily Show 2pm - Johnny Whitehead 4pm - Time For Thomas 5pm - Ibiza Show 7pm - Audio Rehab Sessions 9pm - Big City Lights Live Music Pendulum Friday 10th December @ 6.30pm AECC Arena The hyperactive Australians stop by Aberdeen on their new ‘Immersion’ tour. Tickets £22.50. The Hostiles w. The Hijacks Sunday 12th December @ 8pm Cafe Drummond Ska/punk. Tickets - £4 Drum Eyes w. PVH/Matricarians Thursday 16th December @ 8pm Tunnels Notable for using Game Boy sound effects in their music. Tickets - £6. Acoustic Ladyland w. Min Diesel Saturday 18th December @ 8pm Cafe Drummond See them one last time before they change their name and style next year. Tickets - £10 from One-Up, £12 on door. Listings Editor: Aaron Murray Theatre Sleeping Beauty His Majesty’s Theatre 4th December - 9th January Pantomime starring Elaine C. Smith. Club Nights Octopussy @ Liquid Snow Baw Thursday 9th December @ 11.30pm The usual madness, with added snow. UV Neon Bubble Party @ Liquid Friday 10th December @ 10.30pm Drinks promos all night. Admission - £5 Mothership @ Snafu Dave Clarke Monday 29th November @ 11pm DJ branded as ‘The Baron of Techno by the late John Peel. Tickets - £15. Christmas Ball @ Pearl Lounge Saturday 18th December @ 10pm First 200 people in have the chance to win £100 cash and other prizes. Santa’s Grotto and free hot chocolate until 2.30am. Weekly Radio Guide Cinema Chronicles of Narnia: Voyage of the Dawn Treader Vue Cinemas Released 9th December New movie adaptation of the C.S. Lewis novel. The Tourist Vue Cinemas Released 10th December Stylish action flick starring Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp. Tron Legacy 3D Vue Cinemas Released 17th December Visually stunning update on the original Disney classic. Any social events planned for the start of next term? Get in touch! [email protected] http://usnewstrend.com/news/megamind-3d-user-reviews.html Listings [email protected] 6th December 2010 GAUDIE 11
Winter of Foregone Gents Life & Style [email protected] Now in the thick of the Aberdonian winter, you’ll need to be layered up just to brave the conditions outside, but you’ll also need to know how those layers should be made up. With the emergence of a quirky take on conservative styles this winter from the likes of “Polo Ralph Lauren”, a new sensible gent is born; snug, smart and sartorial. It seems with many trends this season, the country gent is becoming an urbanite, from woodcutter and walking boots, to tweeds and corduroy. None of these would be considered out of the norm if seen on Union Street or somewhere near the Grampians, but worn the right way, they can look pretty peng. Corduroy was once considered the soft option for winter; it did its job but was nothing out of the ordinary. However, maybe this winter corduroy could do with a second look, especially with some of the choices on offer. “Polo Ralph Lauren” was one of many who developed a more refined view of corduroy, which can be seen in their “Cord Spencer Jeans” available for a steep £100, showing what this seasons take on cord is all about; sartorial. Luckily, there are a few cheaper options; TOPMANs “Stone Cord Side Button Chinos” coming in at £40 are another example of how this look should be worn. But, cheaper than that, are the cords I got from H&M in Union Square, which only cost about £16, and although they may not be as tailored as the other options, they do a good enough job for me. Don’t think that corduroy has to be worn just below the waist, this season designers such as Margaret Howell and Hiroshi Awai show us that cords look just as good up top. For an idea on the look, check out “Creep by Hiroshi Awai Corduroy Jacket” on ASOS. Even better would be a corduroy shirt, however, you’d probably struggle to find it in most places around Aberdeen to be honest. But Carhartts “Job Corduroy Shirt” coming in at £55 on ASOS is a really nice example of which way you should be heading. For something a tad cheaper, try looking on TOPMAN.com, my pick of the bunch would be the “Light Stone Cord Shirt” at £32. Remember, don’t be afraid to double up cords, just be careful it doesn’t look ridiculous, and keep it smart. Forget cotton and wool this winter it’s too cold. This season, the look of a woodcutter has been given a certain je ne sais quoi, so don’t be afraid to don a flannel shirt for your smart casual, even plain old smart night out, for something a bit more chic. A good example would be TOPMANs “Brown Brushed Flannel Shirt” now on sale at £13, so be quick! Boots are back just in time. Traipsing through the snow in a pair of flimsy trainers or brogues won’t get you far I’m afraid... believe me, I’ve tried. After a decade of watching boots get a pointier toe, it’s important to (excuse the pun) “point out” that this season, it seems as though boots should be rounded. Whether walking or Chelsea, a good pair of boots is essential, and my pick of the bunch would be a pair of Dr. Martens “Chelsea Boots” for £75. Regarding accessories, well I’m not 100% certain myself yet, but I’ll tell you what I’ve noticed. A lot of fashion bloggers seem to be sporting a flat cap, and it seems to be catching on. I myself have once or twice sported a flat cap once owned by my granddad, so it’s pretty vintage. But, walk into any shop such as H&M or New Look and you’ll find one for about £10...only problem is it doesn’t keep your ears warm. Other than that, I’ve noticed that there has been a depart from the over sized beanie hats that we’ve been seeing over the past few years, and an emergence of the mini beanie. I first noticed this through a friend, and for an idea, look at the “Ignite Multicolour Cuff Beanie” at £16 from ASOS. Ultimately this look is about being smart, and being warm. Remember, smart no longer means matching, and a jacket which doesn’t match, but compliments the trousers is a better, quirkier option this season. Colours should be focused around brown (it’s even been said that brown is the new black) and the best tone to go with would be camel, you should try and own at least one camel item. With these clothes you’re not going to get cold, and you’re going to look smart. But as it’s Aberdeen, don’t forget a shearling jacket...just in case. Conor Riordan fashion. First of all, I have urgent news to report: there has been an outbreak of pandas on our university’s campus. Everywhere I look there are panda’s faces. Unfortunately, I am not talking of the animal but of the sudden trend of panda hats. People are wearing hats with eyes and ears on them. I feel like I’ve arrived at Disneyland or the toy department in Harrods. Yes I strongly recommend hats on cold, wet and windy Aberdonian days, of which there are many, but please can you do this in a stylish way that doesn’t make you look like a lost and confused cartoon character. For example, girls, try a cute Fedora or a floppy hat from the 70s era. There are a few constraints and guidelines for hats- please follow accordingly. Girls, for effortlessly chic, try a French beret. Or, sticking to the French theme, try a ‘cloche’ hat, which means ‘bell’ and looks like one too! This look is becoming quite popular and celebrities such as Blair Waldorf from Gossip Girl and Paris Hilton have been seen wearing them. However, if you want to avoid looking like a French person, try a trilby or stick to the fall back fedora. For the boys: beanies are back! This hat is a great one for keeping your head warm and can be squashed into your bags during lectures. Please only wear trapper hats if you are Swedish or are a lumberjack in your free time. Also, caps should only be worn when running or doing other sports, not everyday. If like me, you hate it when a hat flattens your hair, the fashion world has cooked up some pretty alternatives! Ear muffs are a firm favourite but also making an up and coming appearance is the special hair band which covers the ears and doesn’t rest on the head, thus keeping you warm and your hair volumised! Apart from students, hats are very popular due to their functionality and their style. Policemen, firemen and sailors....need I say more?! The hat may not be the main focus point but it sure contributes to the outfit. John Wayne frequently wore a cowboy hat and even the Monopoly man has a bowler hat. Fighting for the girls, Zara Phillips is always photographed with a hip head piece and Lady Gaga, whose choice of a slab of meat as a hat at the MTV Video Music Awards in September was probably not the sensible choice. Even though she does have a certain ‘je ne sais quoi’ when it comes to fashion. So if you are looking for something to complement your suit or smarten up a casual outfit, pick up a hat. They never go out of style and will help keep you warm. Just watch out for any strong gusts of wind! Are you a mad hatter or just mad for hats? Rosalind Stevenson 12 GAUDIE 6th December 2010
Photo: Robin Parker fashion. Best Dressed on Campus Adam McIlroy and Rosie Dodd model their winter fashions Photos by Leo Stockford Did you know that in Medieval representations of Moses, be that sculpture or painting, Moses is depicted with horns? Yes, horns, two of them, sprouting from his head. Yes, like the Devil! Moses is a biblical figure, said to have lead the ‘Children of Israel’ out of slavery in Egypt. During this exodus, once the Hebrews escaped the following Egyptians through the red sea, Moses climbed Mount Sinai. There he encountered God in the form of a burning bush and was given the Ten Commandments. The Tem Commandments are a list of rules by which one should live according to god. Moses is acknowledged as a prophet in Judaism as well as Christianity and the Islam. The devil has horns because he is a grotesque animal, man-like, fallen angel, ghoulish, supernatural being. The King of the underworld, ready to lure you into evil deeds. Why would a major prophet of Judaism, Islam and Christianity have horns like the Devil? Apparently, when the Hebrew texts of Exodus 34 where translated into Latin by Saint Jerome, in circa 386 A.D., the patron saint of translation made a mistake! The Hebrew text illustrates Moses descent from Mount Sinai, and as Moses came down the mountain he is described as having ‘rays of divine light coming from his head’. The word for ray and the word for horn in Hebrew are very similar and St. Jerome chose the wrong one. So his Latin translation described Moses coming down the mountain with horns growing out of his head. Thus from this mistranslation artists for hundreds of years later, probably the most famous of which is Michelangelo, would depict Moses with horns like the Devil. - To Claire, for whom knowledge, language and words are the greatest pleasures. Gaudie begins a new column focussing on bizarre little known facts Johanna Faust Did you Know? MY TOP5 Christmas Gifts Benny Harvey SUBMIT YOUR TOP FIVES! gaudie.editor@ abdn.c.uk Life & Style 6th December 2010 GAUDIE 13 [email protected] With the weather taking over everyone’s lives over the last fortnight, we give some thought to positives that can be taken from the snowy period. 1An ideal excuse The travel chaos caused by the snow is a great excuse to get out of uni commitments. “Yeah sorry I’m stranded on a bus between Glasgow and Perth, can’t make it in for that presentation I’m meant to be doing. Blame the snow” 2Destroy the hard work of others Kicking over snowmen under cover of darkness is one of the best ways to relieve stress. Just thinking about the poor idiots that toiled in the cold for hours making that misshapen lump only to find it destroyed is so fucking funny. 3Assault Cyclists If you hate cyclists then you have an infinite supply of non-lethal material for pelting them with. I saw a guy doing this the other day, and he seemed to be having the time of his life. 4Block cars in to driveways After watching people spend ages trying to dig their cars out of parking spaces, why not have some fun shovelling snow around as many cars as you can find? That is, if you’d rather pick on drivers than cyclists. 5Create a moment of romance, and then ruin it Go for a romantic walk with your special sweetheart, and enjoy the feeling of silence and solitude that comes with a fresh blanket of snow. Then smack them in the face with snowballs. Repeatedly.
Life & Style 14 GAUDIE 6th December 2010 [email protected] New Years resolutions, they are always the same. How long do you manage to hold to yours? Not long? Well honestly that is not because you don’t want it enough or because you don’t have enough will power. Its because your initial resolution as inadequate, not you! When making a resolution, lets say to exercise more, you need to specific! If you say ‘My new years resolution is to exercise more’, well what does that really mean? So lets get specific. If you never ever go to the gym, or just very irregularly, how about making a resolution to go to the gym twice a week. Don’t make extreme goals like ‘I will go to the gym everyday’ or ‘I will not eat any junk ever again’ these are just not realistic and your setting yourself up for failure. It is vital that you are realistic about your goal. If you hardly go to the gym, then going regularly twice a week is an accomplishment. (I would also avoid making a whole list of resolutions, pick what is most important to you and focus on that.) Don’t say ‘I will go to the gym at least twice’, this is an opportunity for you to be ambiguous, and will also make you feel like you should be doing more, but your not, thus making you feel disappointed with yourself. It cannot be stressed enough that being realistic is your number one priority. If you find you have under estimated yourself, move your goals up a bar. But if you set your goals to high, like vowing to go the gym four times a week or every day, and you then don’t manage, you will get disgruntled and disappointed with yourself, ultimately leading you go give up. Set yourself realistic deadlines and goals along the way. Make it fun, reward yourself when you reach the mini goals along the way. Set a timeline for when you’re going to do something by, deadlines are an aid not a burden. Make goals with friends. That way you have someone to support and be supported by. Next you must make a strategy for when the little devil on your shoulder whispers in your ear. Make a coping strategy for when you don’t feel like it, for when procrastination strikes! These strategies should also include what-to-do-plans for when you don’t make it to the gym twice in a week and you feel like giving up. Remember to be realistic. Part of keeping a resolution is breaking old habits. Yes this is very difficult but it comes down to making a decision. And once you have a consistent routine down for meeting your goals, you will realize it is no longer stressful but it has become natural to go exercise, and you end up missing it when you cant go! The more individual, specific, realistic and developed your resolution is the greater your odds for success! NOTE: 5. Be happy – Remember this is really your responsibly, no one can make you happy. They can add to your happiness, but they alone will not ever be sufficient to make you happy, only you are. 6. Find true Love – Is there such a thing? I am not sure there is much of a strategy for this other than being open to the mysterious workings of the universe. How is Christmas celebrated across the globe? Anisha Sood New Zealand Christmas in New Zealand is less about snow and more about sun, sand and barbecues in the garden. Christmas falls into the summer holidays, so as well as buying presents and decorating houses, families are preparing for trips to the beach. Many towns have a Santa parade with decorated floats, bands and marching girls. Whilst many New Zealanders still cook a ‘traditional’ Christmas roast on Christmas Day, picnics and barbeques at the beach are becoming just as popular. Traditional Christmas pudding and mince pies are still a favourite, but dessert for Christmas lunch is often pavlova. Food left out for Santa by children is usually a glass of sherry and a mince pie but can also include apple pie, cookies and a glass of milk. Spain The Christmas season in Spain begins on 8th December, with a weeklong observance of the Feast of the Immaculate Conception. This is held in front of the Gothic cathedral in Seville. In Seville’s great cathedral, an ancient dance is performed called Los Seises to honor the Virgin Mary, the patron saint of Spain. On Christmas Eve known as ‘Nochebuena’ or ‘the Good Night’, tiny oil lamps are lit in all the houses with the appearance of the stars in the sky. There is a festive Christmas dinner for family members who gather around the Nativity scenes in their homes after the Midnight Mass. Sweden Christmas begins in Sweden with the Saint Lucia ceremony. It is celebrated by a girl dressing in a white dress with a red sash round her waist and a crown of candles on her head (watch out for burning hair). The crown is made of Lingonberry branches which are evergreen and symbolise new life in winter. Children in Sweden look forward on Christmas Eve to gifts brought by Jultomten. They leave him a bowl of porridge by the fireplace and also put candles on windowsills, so he can find his way to the children’s homes. The main Christmas feast in Sweden is served on Christmas Eve. People traditionally enjoy a smorgasbord feast, which includes dried fish, Christmas ham, boiled potatoes, pork sausage, herring salad, spiced breads, and many different kinds of sweets. It is said that whoever finds the almond in the special rice pudding will marry in the coming year. The Netherlands Christmas traditions in the Netherlands revolve around the celebration of Saint Nicholas (which the Dutch call Sinterklaas) and takes place on 6th December. Holland has long been a country of sailors and Saint Nicholas, who is believed to be the patron saint of sailors, is regarded very highly. Children here believe that St. Nicholas sails from Spain on his feast day, along with his helper Black Peter. Black Peter is believed to slide down the chimneys and fill the little wooden shoes left by the fireplace with gifts. Amsterdam and other cities hold great celebrations to herald Sinterklaas’ arrival by holding parades and ringing church bells. Dinners on Sinterklaas Avond (St. Nicholas Eve) usually include roast goose, vegetables, and homemade breads. Boiled chestnuts, fruit, an almond paste bread (kerststol) similar to marzipan, and cookies are also popular. Many families bake letter cakes shaped like the first letter of each family member’s name to add a personal touch to the festivities. Los Seises in Seville health. The same old New Year’s resolutions and how to keep them this time around Rachel Mauro 1. Exercise more 2. Go on a diet 3. Quit smoking 4. Drink less 5. Be happy 6. Find true Love 7. Be more organized 8. Spend less/ save more 9. Stop procrastinating 10. Eat a lot less junk! “Breaking old habits is very difficult but it comes down to making a decision.”
Life & Style 6th December 2010 GAUDIE 15 [email protected] Overheard all over the world As New Year fast approaches, people around the world will be planning for the coming year, eager to get off to the best start as possible! The 1st January offers us the opportunity to forget the past and wipe the slate clean. Many people will eat certain foods believed to bring good luck and prosperity. Traditions vary from culture to culture, but there are striking similarities in what’s consumed in different parts of the world: The main groups of auspicious foods are grapes, greens, pork and cakes. An old Spanish tradition is to eat twelve grapes at midnight— one grape for each stroke of the clock. Each grape represents a different month and the flavor represents how that lucky that month will be. Cooked greens are consumed at New Year’s in different countries for one simple reason — their green leaves look like folded money, and therefore symbolise good fortune. Danish people eat stewed kale sprinkled with sugar and cinnamon while the Germans eat cabbage. The principle is that that the more greens you eat the more prosperous you will be in the coming year. The custom of eating pork on New Year’s symbolises progress. The idea behind it is that the pig pushes forward, rooting itself in the ground before moving. It’s generally served in Cuba, Spain, Portugal and Austria. In some countries such as in Greece, a special coin is hidden inside a baked cake and the person who finds it will be lucky in the New Year. Sweden and Norway have similar customs whereby they hide a whole almond in rice pudding—whoever gets the nut is guaranteed great fortune in the New Year. As well as auspicious foods to eat, there are certain ones to avoid too! For example, eating lobster is a bad idea because they move backwards and could therefore lead to setbacks. Chicken is also avoided because good luck could fly away at any time. So why not try (or avoid) some of these foods at your New Year’s dinner! They are quick and simple to prepare and could give you a helping hand in having a happy and prosperous New Year. Anisha Sood Lucky New Year Foods! food & drink. Where to start with this piss-poor café. Situated just round the corner from Kilau Coffee (where I have retired to write this review), it should be hoped that they would draw on the skills and presentation demonstrated by their neighbours. They have not. I would go so far as to say that they have taken note of all the things that Kilau does well and decided to do the opposite. Where service in Kilau is rapid and assured, the servers who run about the Coffee House have the panicked looks of deer caught in headlights. More often than not, food and drinks are delivered to the wrong people. Speaking of the food and drink, two things must be noted. Firstly, come with your wallet fully stuffed, because a sandwich and a black coffee will set you back £7.00. Whilst I appreciate that this is not an entirely university town, to apparently purposefully set your prices above those that the average student can afford seems a trifle foolish. Of course Kilau is hardly cheap; £2.40 for the same sized coffee seems to make my ranting about prices contrary. But then again, Kilau delivers. If I ask for an Americano - which, incidentally, I did - I expect to see a crema floating on top of a dark drink. What one recieves in the Coffee House is a mug full of hot grit. Immediately, it is obvious that many of the baristas have received little or possibly no training at all. On to food. Here, at least, the Coffee House is comparable to Kilau. The food is of a similar quality and the two cafés offer their overpriced goods at approximately the same prices. So then to the clincher. Service. The baristas in Kilau are friendly. They are helpful. They are knowledgeable. Their counterparts in the Coffee House are, in a single word, not. Furthermore the management at Kilau are eager to help and happy to solve any problems, few and far between though they are. The manager at the Coffee House - or at least, the manager on the day I had the misfortune to venture in - is rude at best and offensive at worst. His rudeness is not merely limited to his customers; his staff, too, appear to suffer the brunt of a man apparently possessed of the notion that all people aside from he are idiots and a burden to his shoulders. He is, in short, a man one would expect to find his niche in employment which requires no contact with the public at all - a Tube driver, or a dustbin man. Time will tell, but with the comforts of Kilau just round the corner, I wonder how long the Coffee House can survive. Overheard Aberdeen The Bobbin Girl 1 in toilet stall: That was a big drink! Girl 2 in another toilet stall: yeah, I hear you on that! In Crombie Hall’s TV Room, 2001: Q:”Have you any sisters?” A: “No...but I’ve gotta mum!” Overheard Sydney Girl #1: I just love the fashion right now Girl #2: yeah, it’s like knocked-up schoolgirl chic Overheard at Bondi Junction By Lexi W. Overheard New York Dominican girl #1: Yo, when you go to the Dominican republic, everyone is mad nice to you because they think you are rich and can help them out. Everyone there thinks people in the US are all rich. Dominican girl #2: Yeah, but they don’t know we got poor people here, too. Dominican girl #1: Word, they think the whole country’s rich, like Ireland. Overheard in Toronto Girl 1: “He bought an old house, like 100 yrs old or so, cause you know how English people like old things.” Girl 2: “No, not necessarily. That’s racist!” Girl 1: “Yeah they do! You know, like the Antiques Roadshow.” Overheard in London Large woman pacing up and down tube of males reading papers getting very annoyed no one would give her a seat and exclaimed: “oh for goodness sakes, are there no gentlemen on this train?” cue anonymous paper reader to reply: “there are plenty of gentlemen my lady, there are just no seats”. Overheard by Robbi, Victoria line Overheard in Paris Dans la file d’attente d’un fast food à Reuilly-Diderot, un jeune couple discute de ce qu’il va commander : - Tu devrais prendre ce sandwich la, il est vraiment trop bon! - Ah non, je n’aime vraiment pas le goût américain de cet hamburger. Entendu par Pierre The Coffee House, Gaelic Lane Jonathan Kerr Overpriced and Underwhelming The Coffee House: struggling to live up the standards set by Kilau Photo: Leo Stockford This elegant Indian Restaurant is tucked away in a side road off the top end of Union Street. Its outward appearance is unspectacular, but it’s not what’s on the outside that counts. If you’re an Indian cuisine novice, as we were, you may take half an hour or more to decide what to order. Whilst mulling over the vast and varied menu on offer, we enjoyed poppadoms with a selection of dips and a pint of Indian Kingfisher Beer. Picking a main course was a lottery to say the least, but we took our chances and it paid off. Most choices on the menu were around the £9 mark, give or take. The menu consisted of a standard selection of dishes, with which you could have chicken, lamb, king prawn or the vegetarian option. Rice, naan bread and any other side dishes had to be ordered separately, and cost two or three pounds depending on what you fancied! Alternatively there were a selection of speciality dishes which included rice in their price of roughly £10. We settled for a shared mixed starter of different types of pakora and chicken wings and for main we ordered one of the speciality dishes, the Chicken Biryannie, a Roghan Josh curry with rice, and garlic naan bread. The starter was good value and offered a selection of different tastes, which was a practical idea for clueless rookies such as ourselves, but altogether was unnecessary in a meal that had us stuffed half way through the main course. The chicken pakora was especially delicious though and is probably worth spending another few pounds on! The main course, supported by the rice and the naan bread, easily fills up one person, and could probably be shared by two smaller eaters, which sadly, we are not! The Roghan Josh was spicy but not overwhelmingly so, and was complimented perfectly by the side dishes. The Chicken Biryannie was equally tasty, and came with a curry sauce which added considerable spice, but could be requested in a milder form. Our total bill came to £40, including drinks, and could have been cut down on significantly if we had had a better idea of exactly what we were ordering. This has to be put down to our lack of experience in this genre of cuisine, and we will order much less when we return to Shahbaaz, which will be sooner rather than later. Shahbaaz Rose Street Jack Brady & Penelope Bones Food which is second to naan
GAUDIE 6th December 2010 Sport [email protected] Gaudie’s search of the University of Aberdeen’s lesser known sports clubs continued this week with two of its journalists heading to a nice dry indoor sport, floorball, to investigate what it involves. John Braid and James Valentine found themselves on opposing teams, battling for bragging rights in their floorball debut. Floorball is a peculiar sport that combines ice hockey, field hockey, five-a-side football and sprint training, or at least that’s what it feels like. Each team has six players, including a goalkeeper, who has no stick and is padded up to his eyeballs and is required to throw himself around fearlessly. The other five players are split into two defenders and three attackers. The playing area is constructed much like an ice hockey rink, with two small sets of goals, and short walls around the edges of the pitch to make an enclosure. JOHN James was roped into playing goalkeeper, whilst I gratefully went to practice my outfield skills. Warm up consisted of various passing and dribbling drills, and culminated in a satisfying shooting exercise, where the outfield players all fired in shots at the bewildered James. I learnt that the sound of a floorball hitting a keeper’s helmet makes a surprisingly satisfying noise. As with most sports practices I have ever been to, the players quickly became impatient with the drills, instead desiring to get a taste of a match situation, and we were split into two sides. Although there are technically two defenders and three attackers on a team, the positions seemed to be interchangeable- playing as a forward didn’t help you to escape the fact that you had to run back and provide support for your defenders, and then sprint forward again. I was soon struggling to keep up with the pace of the match, but proudly provided two goal assists over the course of the game. The ball ricocheting off your stick into the path of one of your team’s good players counts as a deliberate pass, right? The sport was fast paced, energetic, and with so many begginers there, great light hearted fun! JAMES John was approached to play in goals: he said he would rather play outfield but I could see the fear in his eyes. I stepped up to the plate- my lack of coordination and an old sweaty kit made for a shoddy performance. I wasn’t the best goalkeeper on pitch, but as some of the new players showed the sport is difficult all round. As a keeper, you have to spend the game on all fours and use any part of your body possible to prevent the ball from hitting the back of the net. Luckily, the ball is light and the helmet on my head was almost excessive, but as they say, you should always wear protection. The sport is energetic, fun and exciting. It’s like combining ice or field hockey with five-aside football, which to those of you that want to keep fit or to those who wish to take part in a serious and growing sport, means it is an ideal activity. The University Floorball team formed recently and as a result is in need of members. It began last year when the core of the new team split from the Aberdeen Floorball Club the ‘Aberdeen Oilers’ due to lack of funding and issues regarding females playing for the team. The team’s base is made up of about 4 or 5 experienced players who love their sport and want to show the University that it deserves recognition amongst more traditional sports. Floorball is typically a Scandinavian sport, but since the mid 1980s it has expanded rapidly and the governing body the IFF (International Floorball Federation) now has 49 members worldwide. In the UK the sport has been growing at a steady pace since the 1990s with teams forming all the way from the south coast up to Dundee and Aberdeen. The British team is currently ranked 18th for Men and unranked for women, which means there is massive scope for improvement in the sport. If you are coordinated, athletic and agile this sport could be for you. Floorball in the UK Training: 6pm, Saturday Aberdeen Sports Village I don’t give a puck about ice hockey, this sport has balls feature. Training at Aberdeen Sports Village: players are put through their paces at University training whilst, inset, professionals play the game. Photo: Penne Bones Get free publicity for your sports club>>> Email [email protected] to have your club featured in our next edition.