She Rose Interior Proof

she rose

again. He said “Cousin! Thank you Jesus! Hallelujah! I hear it cousin.”
I tried to tell him what happened in my room. I told him God was
there. “I saw HIM cousin! I am getting back to the church. God showed me the
church I am supposed to go to. I just spoke with my sister, and she is going to
go with methis Sunday.”

My sister called me back later to check on me to see if I was still good.
She asked me what church I wanted to go to. I told her I wanted to
either go back to NJ to our cousin’s church or the big church on the hill
where we went to the funeral. She said our niece Keo told her she had
been visiting the same church. Now, Keo had been taking mydaughter
to church with her too on some Sunday’s if my sister didn’t take her. I
didn’t realize she was going to that church. I told my sister not to tell her,
it would be a surprise.It was Sunday, July 23rd, 2006. My sister was very
early picking me up for church. I hadon all white. I have a V-neck short
sleeve knit blouse, and a white mini shirt and black striped six-inch
sandals. My breast was showing a little cleavage, but I didn’t let it stop
me. I was going to church, and nothing was going to stop me.

I am back at the huge church on top of the hill. I always said I never want
to go toa big church because your pastor will not know you. My family
church was small compared to this mega church. It’s cool because no one
will know me. I can get my Wordand go home. They had the greeters at
the first set of doors. It was the brothers opening the doors for everyone.
The gentleman who opened it looked right at me and said, “Welcome
to the House of The Lord. Have you been here before?” I looked at him
and said, yes. I was not lying because I was here a few months ago for
a funeral. He said, “Welcome back. If you want to dance, dance. If you
want to shout, shout. This is where we worship Him.” I am still trying to
get across the vestibule. What I didn’t know was that he knew my sister.
He thought I was her. When she came in behind me, he said, “Hey! I
thought you all look familiar.” They went to high school together.

79 |

she rose

The energy in the church was live. I didn’t know it was the Bishop’s
anniversary. I also did not know my second oldest sister Sandie, my
brother, one of my male cousins,my niece, her daughter, and best friend
were all there. Everyone was surprised! God led all of us to church on
this day. Since it was the Bishop’s anniversary his best friend preached.
When he finished preaching, he did the altar call. I knew it was my first
time there for church service. I knew I was not going up to join. Everyone
was getting up fromtheir seat running to the front. I was in the back of
the church, two rows from the back. It’s almost over. I am leaving out
and coming back next week. I could not see. My eyes were so full of
tears, but I did not want to look left or right. I did not want the people
walking around to see me or come ask me if I am saved or if I have a
church home. I stopped and eased back to my seat. The preacher gave
the mic to the Bishop. He told themusicians to stop the music.

“I can feel it. There is someone else. You fought to get here. You know this
is whereyou are supposed to be. God already showed you.” My eyes are
so full of tears I can’t see.I grabbed my daughter’s hand and pulled her
out of the row. The church went off. He said “Uh huh… I felt tugged.
They sat me on the first bench on the right-hand side andthrew a sheet
over my lap and a tied one around my neck. You will not be showing
thosegirls on this front row. When, they walked everyone who just
joined or wanted to besaved to this conference room in the back. I look
around and see both of my sisters havejoined as well. I knew it was God
moving. We all have not been in the same church asmembers since I
was a teenager.

I go back home and tell my babe I joined the church. “You got to come with me.
Itwas cool. Besides, you know your buddy was a faithful member there. So, we
will be fine.”

She said, “Okay baby you go. I will be right here. You know I love the Lord.”

| 80

she rose

“I know babe. Okay.” My life changed, and with my birthday month
approaching,we had plans to travel and party, but I wanted to be at church.
One night at Bible Study, Bishop began teaching on spirits, status, and pictures
in your home. He told the media team to bring up the pictures. He taught
about geisha women. A geisha is a woman highly trained in the arts of music,
dance and entertaining. In some cases, they would seduce men. It was their job.
They would sell their bodies. The teaching was so deep. It made me go back
to my childhood. Where did this spirit come from of same sex attraction? I
thought about pictures and images in my house I was going to get rid of when
I got home. He taught about a couple who were married a long time. They
traveled to Japan. When they returned, they had a spirit of perversion on
them. They wanted todo things they had never done before. It was this night
I bound the spirit of perversion. Itold satan he had to go. When they did the
altar call, I went up for prayer, some reinforcement. I meditated on God’s word
day and night.

On Friday, Spark called. She was excited like always. She said, “Hey, Babe!” I was

quiet. I took a deep breath. I said, “Babe I love you and you are my best friend,
but I canno longer do this. I know my birthday is coming up and we had plans.
I must live for God. I need my relationship right with him.”

“Babe I know. I knew for a while.”

“This is what we are going to do. I am leaving out early tomorrow morning.
I wantyou to take your time and go through every room in the house and
get your belongings.Please do not make this hard. I want us to be friends. It’s
nothing you did. You are a sweetperson. I want to be with Christ. I love you. I
pray you can join me. Your mother wouldbe happy. We can do this. If not,
take whatever you want. If you feel we broughtsomething together and you
want it, it’s yours. Leave the keys in the house. See you.” When I returned home
it felt different. I had to get used to my new relationship.

81 |

she rose

Chapter 9

CLASSIC PUMP

WHEN I THINK OF MY MOTHER

I went to church faithfully every Sunday and Wednesday. My life was hungry
forthe Word. I was learning and excited. I didn’t want to do anything yet, but
my sister, on the other hand, dragged me to choir rehearsal with her. I did not
want to sing anymore. My singing days are over, but my girl from high school
was on the praise team. We sangalto together, and she knew I could sing. She
came over to me and said, “I know you aresinging.”
“No ma’am, I am here with my sister.” Before I knew it, I was in the choir and
wasattending rehearsal on Tuesdays. God was opening doors. I was listening to
the preaching and teaching. I opened Let It Go Spa! I was so excited when I got
the keys to my suite. Two of my cousins are hairstylists and owned suites inside

83 |

she rose

of a salon. The onein Lanham Maryland had this space in the back hall. God
gave me the vision to ask if wecould build two rooms back there for Massage
Therapy. The owner said yes.

Although it was a great idea for me to come out of my basement doing
massages,the people either wanted me to do it free or they did not want to pay
my reasonable price.Honestly, people did not know the benefits of getting a
massage. Massages reduce stress, improves sleep, helps in pain management,
detoxification, and strengthens immune system. People associated self-care with
getting their hair, nails, and feet done. As a result, I was robbing Peter to pay
Paul. I was paying my mortgage and my lease as a single mother. I was taking
my funds from my salary, and my jewelry business to pay my booth rent. I love
being an entrepreneur, however, you must plan for every aspect of the business.

I was so thrilled when it came to going to church. I knew I would hear a Word
to get me through my week, my month, and my year. It took me a few years to
get settled into a megachurch being my church home. I was truly loving being
in the choir. We would open the service up in a high praise. Most of the time
the choir made the atmosphere conducive and easy for the preacher to preach.

Although, my pure intentions were to worship God, it never fails that I wear eye
catching jewelry. I was mostly known for rocking my 5” shoes. I absolutely love
my heels.I would get dressed based on the shoes first. I would build my outfit
for the day around my shoes, jewelry, then clothing. In that order.

Our church was known for celebrities dropping in. Our pastor had the
opportunity to impact Steve Harvey. Well, guess who came to our church? You
got it! Here I am looking at Uncle Steve. I couldn’t do anything but remember
the morning I had the encounter with God. Uncle Steve shared his heartfelt
testimony. It was as if Godwas confirming to me my encounter and the message,
I heard on the radio the morning when I rededicated my life to Christ. It was
surreal.

I was living my best life. However, I still wanted more. I was standing in
the grocery store in the checkout line and noticed an Essence magazine with

| 84

she rose

Monique on thefront cover looking so fabulous. What captivated my mind was
the bold letters, Your 30- Day Financial Fitness Plan - How to take control
of your life in one month - Make EXTRA Money, Get out of Debt and
Fix Your Credit.

I went on and grabbed the copy to read it later. What I did not know was that
it was about to change my life. I have always been a network marketer. At the
time, however, I didn’t think I still had it in me. I was looking at each business
they listed for you to make extra money. I could not see myself do any of them
but one. It was Lia Sophia. I was no longer a jewelry person. Remember, I used
to sell jewelry, handbags, accessories, etc. I explored Lia Sophia jewelry website
and I really like the pieces. I had toenter my contact information for the nearest
person, and in no time my cell phone rang. The person on the other end was
an Independent Consultant with Lia Sophia. We had a great conversation. She
invited me to her house to take a closer look at the pieces. This woman had
the store in her house. There were so many gorgeous pieces. I knew I wouldbe
successful.

I jumped all in! I wrote my list of 100 people. I invited everyone to come to
my house to begin my newest business venture. Once again, I hit the first level
of manager in record breaking time. It was not long before I hit the next level. I
was excited and on fire. My personal incentives were to make at least $500 extra
every month to buy shoes. Everyone who knows me knows I love high heel
shoes. I went from living paycheck to paycheck to being able to pay my bills,
save some money and buy me a cute heel every now and then. I was recruiting
and teaching not just my team but anyone who came to our team meetings to
duplicate. We were moving fast and having much success. A lot ofwomen have
been very successful. I personally worked my butt off. I was booking at leastone
party a week. In most cases I had three parties every week. I was building a
relationship with the hostess making them my friends. I did not see dollar signs.
Our connections always started with the jewelry. By the time they got to know
me they knewI wanted them to earn money and get free jewelry.

85 |

she rose

Then, here comes the devil. There were several jealous women who started
questioning my intentions. They were lying and talking about me. They were
creatingstories in their small, minded head which were far from the truth. I still
tried to show loveand keep it holy. My now best friend, Shorty Redz, on the
other hand was not having it. Let me introduce you to Shorty Redz. Shorty
Redz showed up to one of my team meetings. She was on my second level. I
didn’t personally recruit her. Every month I hadMs. Redz’s name come up as
one of the Top Sellers. She was always number one or two.However, she was
not at the meetings. The day she came, I am conducting my meetingwith all
of this unbelievable high energy. I mean I was hilarious. All my jokes were funny!
I am not just saying this. The people in the room were cracking up. I had
everyoneengaged. It was a true gift. By this point I had some great leaders.
One of my personalrecruits was a Jehovah’s Witness. I met her at one of the
parties I went to. I once had aparty where my girlfriend Bella was the hostess.
Her one party carried me over one year of weekly home parties, because of
the power of networking. Today, I am still friends with many of these people I
met twenty-six years ago in Direct Sales/MLM. The lady who was a Jehovah’s
Witness called me after the party I met her at and said she wanted to schedule
her party. It was around Christmas. She let me know she would have a lot of
people there, but I couldn’t mention Christmas or Jesus. Do not, Do not, and
Do not! Sheassured me, however, that we were going to have fun!

In my mind, I was wondering how I could not talk about Jesus who is the
reason for the season. I prayed and God told me to go. It was not about money
for me. I was being stretched, shaped, and molded. I did not change who I
was. In my presentation I was authentic. I told them upfront who I was and
what I believed. I am not here to offendthem. I love and respect them. We had
a ball. She booked six parties that night, and her team alone grew to over 100
women. They were coming to my team meetings. I have theChristians, Jehovah’s
Witnesses, and The Too Live Crew! The Too Live Crew… It’s whatever! I had
hundreds of women from all walks of life. Redz sponsored The Too LiveCrew.

| 86

she rose

Redz went from being untrusting with me to us becoming close. I was able to
bounce ideas off her, and she respected me as her leader. We eventually found
out she was four days older than me. We knew we had a connection. While
I am the one who loves and trusts everyone upfront, Redz would say, nope
I do not trust her. She would say, you need to watch this one, too…and she
was ALWAYS RIGHT! Wow! Redz is married, with a bonus son. She had a
crew of her own. Her older best friends and family. She would invite me to
their cookouts. Of course, they only knew me as her business partner, but we
were getting closer and closer. This woman knew everything! I was livingmy best
single life with my teenage daughter. She was Auntie Redz to my baby girl.
Shestarted being my right hand helping me through big team events such as
Blingo. It was Bingo, but you won jewelry. We would find the venues, create
the flyers, get the caterers,and buy the decorations. We would host team award
events. We created the best team meetings.

One day at one of our meetings The Too Live Crew started sharing ideas to
get new customers. One of them yelled out, “well I am not knocking on no
doors like a Jehovah Witness.” I am standing in the front of the room. My team of
Jehovah’s Witnesseswas on my right. They all turned their heads to their right,
my left, where the comment came from. I am offended! What do you mean?
It was crazy. I had to gain order in the room and manifest conflict resolution.
I had to get everyone to respect everyone’s differences. You don’t have to agree,
but you must respect it. In this moment, I understood why God had allowed
me to rise in leadership. He showed me how much Hecares for all of us. Of
course, everyone wanted to be divided. It was crazy. If we had prayer everyone
would join in a circle holding hands. But the Jehovah’s Witnesses would be
on the outside circle in a semicircle. They did not want to say, “in Jesus’ name,
Amen.”It was a true experience.

I kept recruiting, doing parties, and traveling. I earned so many trips. I was
singleso I took my sister on many of my trips because she kept my daughter
most of the time as I was building my empire. Hawaii was my dream vacation,
and when I earned the tripto Hawaii, it was for ten days FREE! I wrote what

87 |

she rose

it took to get there. I set my daily, weekly, and monthly goals. I was so proud
of myself. I took my sister Tee on her first cruise. It was all expenses paid. She
did not have to pay for anything, not even taxes or gratuity. It was around her
birthday. So, we partied for her birthday.

I eventually invited Redz to come to my church. I would be in the choir singing
and shouting. I would look in the congregation and what did I see? My best
friend, Redz,finally came. She was not an outwardly worshipful person, but I
could see her being moved by the Holy Spirit. She still was a firecracker. She is
another one who is 5’2” likemy older sister with a big attitude. You know these
short people don’t play. They say what they mean and mean what they say. It
was a blessing to know I was influencing herto come to church. She gave her
life to Christ. She even was bringing her husband. He was brought up in the
church. We found out later he went to my childhood neighbor’s church.

You know my dresses, shoes and of course my jewelry was always on point.
Oneof the deaconesses at the church gave me a compliment about my watch.
We called the watch a booker hooker. She said, your watch is so cute. I said,
I can tell you how you canget it FREE. She said, how? I said, “Book a party!”
She immediately booked a home party.As usual, we became good friends. She
started inviting me to her house for other gatherings. I noticed a few familiar
faces from our church. I didn’t know any names; I barely knew all the people
in the choir. What I noticed, most of them went to the old church which used
to be down the street. All you heard everyone say, “I am from 227,” which was
the address of the old church. It was as if 227 was a smaller, tighter knit, good
old fashion Baptist church.

The Pastor is a preaching machine, so he was called to so much more. He built
a new mega church on the hill, 007 Hilltop Way. It was no longer a Baptist
church; it was now a non-denominational church. He was preaching the Bible.
He preached the people out of hell. He had a way to captivate the congregation
as soon as he stepped into the pulpit, after we sang praise, worshipped, and more

| 88

she rose
praise. In most cases we were able toset the atmosphere to make it conducive
for him to preach. He would step up to the mic and throw his hands up. He
would give the command for everyone to worship God. When he opened his
mouth, he said “Throw your hands up, throw your head back and give God
some praise!” This happened every Sunday and Wednesday.
By this time my sister Tee and I were getting our hair styled by our big little
brotherDarius. He was on the praise team. He was one of the 227 crew. We
became so tight with him. He was married and she was blessed to have a
husband who knew fashion. He knewhow to do make-up, and hair. One
year for Mother’s Day, he and his wife hired me to domassages for the
mothers in their life. His mother who is an Elder at our church, his
grandmother who is one of the mothers at the church, his godmother
who is a busy body,his wife’s mother, and her bonus mother. I gave all
of them the best one-hour massagethe day before Mother’s Day. My gift
of massage therapy was making room for me.

89 |

she rose

Chapter 10

MULE

PARDON ME

`It’s not our usual Wednesday night Bible Study. This was the day some of
our Deacons and Deaconesses will be ordained as Ministers. They were being
elevated to preach the Gospel. Whenever we had an ordination, the candidates
would invite their family and friends. So, the church was always extra packed.
It was cool because I was inthe choir. I sat in the alto section, in most cases
I was in the front row. All the sermons were good. Well, look who is one of
the candidates. Robin’s husband’s best friend, Mr. Security. Of course, Robin’s
husband is standing right at the altar pushing his best friend.I was standing
because he was preaching on the Power of the tongue. He preached outof the
book of James chapter three. You have what you say. He was preaching about
owning the bank. You are Bank of America. He preached about owning yachts,

91 |

she rose

airplanes,and helicopters. This is my love language. I believe in wealth. I know
the God we serve owns the cattle on a thousand hills. It was a blessing to see so
many people being elevatedin The Kingdom.

On the following Tuesday, we had choir rehearsal like normal. It’s nothing like it
when you are in choir rehearsal and the presence of the Lord comes in. We were
praisingGod like it was Sunday morning service. A few of our choir members
were elevated lastweek in the ordination service. Rehearsal was so good! As I
walked out of our rehearsal,who did I see in the vestibule? SECURITY! His
hazel eyes. He is 5’11”, a big bald shinyhead, his beard, and moustache had the
jet black Bigen on it. It was perfect. He was veryhandsome. He was sexy! There I
said it. He was sexy! No, I am not lusting. I am a singlefemale calling a handsome
man sexy. He smiled and said, “Hey, hey how are you doing?I was shocked a few
days ago when I got the head nod. Today, I am having a conversation.”

It took a few seconds before I came back to myself. I said, “Hello
Minister. Congratulations to you. I really enjoyed your sermon, The
Power of The Tongue, it was so good. You are a dreamer huh? You’re
going to own banks huh? I love it.” He gave mea smirk. He was trying to
be soft spoken. He said, “Thank you!”

“You’re welcome! Have a good day.” As I was still walking out of the door
to goto my car, he said “Aye, I will see you Thursday?” I was puzzled
because there is no church on Thursday.

“Bible Study is tomorrow, and the Women’s ministry has their service on
Friday.By the way, my sister, Min. Brown asked me to do the opening
scripture for Friday. Ineed to prepare which scripture I am going to
open with.” I am still wondering what heis talking about.

He said, “It’s comedy night at the lounge.”

“Oh! Robin did send me an evite for the event on Thursday, but I thought she
saidit was going to be at her lounge in Clinton, MD.”

| 92

she rose

“Yeah, it’s our event together.” I told him I am probably not going to make
it because I do massages on Thursday. “I have a standard client who comes
faithfully everytwo weeks on a Thursday.”

“So, you are a masseuse?”

“No, sir… I am a Massage Therapist. There is a difference.” He told me I
neededto reschedule, and I responded that he and Robin were trying to mess
with my money. Isaid, “See you tomorrow at Bible study, Minister.” He smiled
and said, “Alright, young.”

I listened to Bible Study from last night while I was at work. After Bible Study I
goto the bookstore and purchase the CD to listen to it again. My client hit me
up this morning. He was going to have to cancel his appointment. On my way
home from work,I thought about the call from one of my favorite male cousins.
We called him Deac. Deacinvited me to meet him at the club called The Park
after work today. It is located downtown in DC. On Thursday’s they went for an
afterwork dance workout. Of course, you know it’s Happy Hour. By this time
in my life my choice of drink was a light glass of wine. Every now and again
a cute cocktail with an umbrella in it. I was done with the hard liquor. I told
Deac I was not sure. In my heart I was really working on my relationship with
God. My client had canceled. The sun was shining bright. It was so beautiful! I
had a cute dress. I knew my cousin’s friends would be just getting off work too.
I would not be too overdressed. It was a hot summer day. My dress was black,
grey,mauve and purple. It was fitted at the top. The twins are showing just a
little. Around thewaist it opens to like an A line. It’s so cute and flirty. My shoe
game is always on point. Ihad on a 5” black stiletto with a cute French manicure
on my cute toes. Across the top ofthe shoe, it was crisscross straps. A Sexy Shoe!
I would have on my 5” all day every day.I knew my cousin was going to be there
no doubt.

I love to dance, I love music, and I love people so here we go! Although it was

crowded, I saw a group of fine-looking men. All flavors! Some of them had on
business suits. Some had on shirts and ties. Oh wow! It was like a candy store.

93 |

she rose

Then, I see the onewho was the life of the party. Everyone was around him as he
was hyping the crowd. AllI saw was teeth! He was cheesing! It’s my cousin. He
was getting it. It reminded me whenwe went to Miami for his 40th a few years
ago. He already knew I am going to party withhim. They made a circle around
us on the tight dance floor. It was Thursday! Yes, FridayEve. His friends were
asking him if I was his wife. He told them I was his cousin. Okay,this cutie pie
grabbed my hands. My cousin told him you don’t want none. She has enough
time for you. We danced and danced all evening. They were taking shots. Cutie
pie asked me what I was drinking. I told him I was good. We all went to sit
down to eat some of their delicious food. All I wanted was their jerk wings. They
were the best. I lovemy Caribbean food. Cutie pie came back to check for me
to see if I was good. I told himno, I’d have a drink since he insisted. I am not
easily influenced, but it was hot. So, I gota Sexy on the beach. I knew I had to
drive home and go to work early tomorrow. I was not going to have another.
One was more than enough. We went back on the dance floorto dance it off.

Once I was ready to go home, my cousin and his friends walked me to my car.
Thenight was beautiful. My daughter was fifteen hanging with her friends. She
was going tomy parents’ house after they came back from H Street. I am headed
home on H Street from downtown. As I was approaching 9th Street NW, I
thought about the comedy event tonight. They should just be ready to start. The
doors opened at 6:30pm. By the time I getthere it should be started. I don’t want
to be too late. I do not need the comedian makingjokes about me being late.
Alright, I am going to go. I hit the 9th Street tunnel. It put me on the highway,
it took me around to I295 South, then I495 north. I got off at exit 7 Branch
Ave, Route 5 South. I was only minutes away. The lounge was off Old Ferry
Alexander Road. It was hard to find a spot. I am so glad someone was coming
out of a space directlyin front of it. It was packed. There was nowhere to park.
All the windows were tinted. I could not see inside. A gentleman was walking
up towards the door at the same time. Hespoke and said, “I got it beautiful. You
look very nice.” I looked him and said, “Thanks so much.”

| 94

she rose

As soon as I stepped in the door… Boom! Here comes the jokes. “Colored
people time, huh?” The comedian on the stage started running his mouth.
Robin was sitting rightat the door collecting the money. I only had $20s on me.
I gave Robin my $20 and she gave me my change. The comedian did not care.
Robin started yelling back at him. “That’s my sister!”

He said, “Your sister is cute and late. Do your sister have a man?” Oh my! Why?
What were you all talking about before I came in here? She said, “No, she is single
and a businesswoman!” He said, “She has a pretty smile too and chocolate.”
Robin had me sit next to the stage with her. The comedian walked over to the
end of the stage and said, “She got cute feet too.” I was so embarrassed. All I
could do was laugh with them. I am glad I am dark. If I was lighter everyone
would see me red hot. It was cool. Once the spotlight was off me, Robin and I
were able to talk. Robin was smiling eye to eye. She could not believe I made
it. I told her I wanted to support and that my client canceled hisappointment. I
told her about meeting my cousin at The Park. She said, “Well I got yourdrink.”
I am puzzled. She said, “You like Moscato. We talked about the wine you drink
at my house.”

“I didn’t realize you remember.”

“I have it for you at the bar. I have to sit here, but I want you to go tell Jermaine
togive me your drink. He knows what it is because I told him I brought it for
you. Tell himto give you two glasses. I walked through the crowd and noticed a
few faces from the church. When I got to the bar, I saw who was standing there.
SECURITY!

“Minister! Hey, Minister!” He started smiling.

“What’s up young? I see you came.”

“Yeah, my client canceled his appointment, so I was able to come. Anyway, Robin
told me to tell you to...” This joker is not paying me any attention. He is getting
a bottle of wine. He opened it and started pulling the glasses. I said, “Oh so you
knew what I wanted.” The way the bar area was built he was standing way over

95 |

she rose

my head. So, he is looking straight. It almost felt like he was ignoring me. He was
very attentive; I just didn’trealize what he was doing. I thought about having a
blingo jewelry pool sheet in my purse. I went in there to pull out money to pay
him. It was so weird, he kept looking straight at the wall. He said, what am I
going to do with that?

“How much do I owe?” He didn’t say anything. He was talking my head
off at church. What is going on here? I pulled the Blingo jewelry pool
sheet out and asked himto purchase a box for $5 for ALL the women in
his life. Jermaine looked at me in my eyesand said “I DON’T HAVE ANY
WOMEN! There is no ALL!” Of course, I did not believe him.

“Boy you are fine. You are lying. I said we have a few pieces for me. One
of themis called Mr. W1derful. Buy your boxes now for $25 you will get
5 boxes. I will call youwhen you win. Think about it. Let me take Robin
her drink.”

It was a cool event. In the back-room Robin had some of her purses she
was aboutto sale. She took me on a tour of the lounge. She told me it
was four of them who ownedit. I told her it was a really nice place. Now,
we could have her jewelry parties here insteadof her house. I informed
her it was getting late, and I had to go and would see her tomorrow. We
had service for The Women’s Ministry. As I was walking by the bar area
to leave, Jermaine and Robin’s husband were standing there talking. Her
husband spoke and said he was glad I came. Minister asked for a business
card so he could call me aboutthe pool. I whipped out my card and gave
it to him. Our hands touch as if we were holding hands on purpose. This
is when I realized the color of his eyes because the lightsare up a little
more. I told him he had nice color eyes. His reply was, “Don’t look in
my eyes, you might get in trouble!” Huh? I went on my way. I did not
think about it no more.I played my music and made it home safely.

I told Redz about my fun night. She was happy I was able to have some
fun. She said I didn’t have a social life and all I did was take care of my

| 96

she rose

daughter, work, go to church, do massages, and sell jewelry. I also told
her about the guy on security who walksout with our pastor. I invited her
to come out tonight, but it was her date night with her husband. After
work, I headed straight to church because my sister was bringing my
daughter with her. I wanted to see if my sister, Minister Brown, needed
help with anything. I know all of us who were going to have a part in the
service had to be there a little earlier to pray together before the service
started.

My phone rang, but I did not recognize the number. I answered because
I am a businesswoman.

“Hello!”

“Hello, can I speak to ReCe, please.”“This is ReCe.”

“Hey, what’s up with you? What are you getting into tonight?” I am trying to
figure out who this is. All I know it is a male on the other end, and the number
is not in my phone.

“I am on my way to church!” “What’s happening at the church?”

“I am sorry who is this?” I don’t even know who I am speaking with.“This is
Manny.” I was so lost.

“Who?”

“Manny. I am calling to talk about all these women I don’t have. What is
happening at the church tonight?”

My eyes got big. I was like, “Oh! Hey Minister! How are you? What? You called
me? So, you are ready to purchase your five boxes. Great! Now, today is a new
day I amnot thinking about yesterday.” I was still talking business. “I need to sell
all my boxes onmy blingo jewelry pool sheet so, what’s up brother?”

“Nah! I am not your brother.” I am looking in the mirror like did this joker just
saywhat I think he said.

He said, “Hello?” “Yes, sir. I am here.”

97 |

she rose

“What’s up when you get out of church?” I told him we were stopping
at a birthday party as soon as church was over. I would be with my
daughter, sister, and niece. I asked him what he was doing tonight.

“I was trying to see you, but I see you are busy. Can you at least call me
when youget out of church?”

“Sure, I can do that I am about to pull up. I will talk to you later.”

I arrived at church and Minister Brown is looking like she is so happy to see
me. Iasked her what she needed. She had to make some changes because people
were calling her at the last minute to tell her they could not do their assignment.
We decided not to worry because the service was going to be great. She had to
make sure everything was set-up for our guest speaker. The female Apostle was
a part of our church organization. She was elevated to an Apostle a few weeks
prior. She is a beautiful lady from the Caribbean. We are ready to start the
service. The Women’s Ministry Team prayed in theback. Then we all walked
out to open service. We had someone singing. Then, it was myturn to give the
scripture. My sister Tee and I was thinking earlier what would be best fortoday.
She gave me a few to choose from. I went to the mic with my excitement.

Psalm 100 – KJV 100:1-5 “Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands.
Serve the Lord with gladness: come before his presence with singing.
Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we
ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture. Enter into his gates
with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise be thankful unto him and
bless his name. For the Lord is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth
endureth to all generations.”

Robin was sitting next to me on the 2nd row. Anyone who knows me know I
love to sit in the front. It helps me to be attentive and less distracted. Robin
jumps up after meto pray. We are waiting and waiting. She has the mic in her
hands. We are thinking she is about to break-out in a prayer. She breaks out
in tears. People start walking towards her. She opens her mouth and apologize
and to give her a minute. She told the devil he was a liar, and she would pray.

| 98

she rose

She told us she had an argument with her husband beforeleaving home. She
finally got the prayer out. We all were praying and setting the atmosphere for
the woman of God to preach.

Apostle came out the gate swinging the bat. She was not playing and preached
thehell out of all of us. My God. Then she started prophesying. She was calling
people up toher. We were standing, watching, and praying. I am still on the
second row and second seat from the center aisle. Apostle reached over Robin
and pulled me into the center aisle.She said, “You are wealthy. You will travel the
world and speak to Nations. You are goingto lead generations to Christ.” She
had her hands on my belly. All I could hear was Minister Brown saying Yes!
She makes this noise when someone is saying something good that she agrees
with. My eyes were closed. I was receiving her words of confirmation. God
had already showed me in a dream everything she was saying. I was already
a presenter. I was speaking to people in their homes from all walks of life. I
praised God for using her to confirm. The service was good.

When we left church, we went to where my sister’s best friend was. She
was having a birthday party for one of her family members. My sister wanted
us to go with her. In the back of my mind, I was trying to figure out what was
up with the Minister. Hecalled and asked me what I was doing later. I told him
it was late, and I was going to bed.He asked me if I was busy the next day and
if he could take me out. I told him, yes and asked him some questions? I found
out that he was single, had four children, and had been married before. I did
not disclose all my history in this conversation. He came to pick me up in a blue
vehicle that looked like minivan. We went to grab something to eat.He took me
downtown to the walk around the monument. We went to The World War
II Memorial, then we walked across the street to The Washington Monument.

The people at the church did not know we were dating. Our relationship moved
very fast, and we fell in what I thought was love very quickly, going from a
dating thingto a fully committed relationship in which we were talking about
marriage. It was at thistime he revealed who the mothers of his sons were and
that he was at some point marriedto them. I was utterly shocked to find that he

99 |

she rose

was still married to the last wife who is thePastor’s niece and was in the process
of getting a divorce. He told me she left him and moved to another state. I
know this may sound wild, but I knew all his ex-wives and we all had a
mutual respect, so I thought.

Prior to knowing him, I bought two tickets to see Raheim DeVaughn, Anthony
Hamilton, Jaheim and many great R&B singers from the 90s and early 2000s
perform liveat Pier 6 in Baltimore on August 31, 2010. Usually, I would invite a
girlfriend or take mydaughter, this time I decided to ask him if he liked concerts
and wanted to go. I was shocked the Minister said yes. We left my house and
he drove my car. As we were ridingon Baltimore Washington Parkway, it was a
beautiful summer day, the music was right, the conversation was good, and we
were still getting to know each other. So now is the time I decided to tell him
about my past, and to my surprise he said he already knew. When I asked him
how he knew this about me, he said one of the associate pastors told him. It’s
cool, because I am not ashamed of my past, however, when I shared it, it was
ina sacred place where what was discussed was not supposed to go any further.
It was the only place I had shared my story. I was a mentor at our church’s
transitional home for women coming out of incarceration and moving into
apartments awarded for them and their children to restart their lives. Many of
the women were battling the spirit of homosexuality. I shared my story of being
delivered because I knew it would help someone in that room.

We enjoyed ourselves at the concert and ran into a lot of people I knew. He got
thechance to see that I was not a wall flower and was well connected. He saw the
impact I had in people’s lives from these encounters. I can remember us standing
at the monumentgazing at the sky, we were standing at the top and all the flags
were flying around us. It was the perfect night as he stood behind me and held
me in his embrace. It felt like we were already one. At the end of the night, he
drove me home to drop me off with a simplegoodnight, not even a kiss. He
called me when he got home to let me know he made it safely and we stayed
on the phone talking a little longer before ending our call, since weboth had
church early the next morning. I was in the choir, and he was a minister and

| 100

she rose

our Pastor’s Armor Bearer. He was very consistent and dated me intentionally
even withboth our schedules being busy. He made sure to make time to see me.

The following weekend after our first date, he set a date for our children to meet.
He took us all out to dinner to this restaurant in Crofton, MD named Nautilus
Diner. Mydaughter and I met three of his sons for the first time. We sat at this
huge round table andthough we rode there together with good conversation,
we sat at the table in an awkwardsilence. He and I were sitting next to each
other, so I whispered to him, “Are you going to say something?” And he just
laughed. Since I was used to home parties all the time inmy businesses, I was
used to breaking the ice. I pulled out one of my ice breakers and had everyone
go around the table, say their name, age and what they were thankful for. The
youngest one that was with us (sidenote, not his youngest child at the time)
made it known he was thankful for his mother. We all laughed. Minister
and I started talking back to each other. Then my daughter started talking
to the second oldest that she was sitting next to and the youngest there
and oldest son were talking to each other as we waited on our food to
come to the table. Eventually the food arrived, and we all continuedto
share in conversation and enjoy our time together. On the ride home I
discovered that the second oldest child was a rapper, so I had him in the
car spitting bars while I beatboxlike Doug E Fresh. I had everyone in the
car laughing as they took us home.

We decided to go to Moe’s Seafood which happened to be located adjacent to
theparking lot where my car was parked. We stopped in to get a bite to eat. We
had a good time, and I was cracking up laughing in my head because, though he
was oh so fine withhis bald head, and hazel eyes, he was dressed a little country
and not for the weather. The waiter could feel the chemistry oozing between
us because even though the place was packed our energy for each other was
strong and kept taking our photos all night. Our beautiful night had to come
to an end because I had to get home to get ready for a 6AM flight to Jamaica
for my daughter’s sweet 16 birthday. We left the restaurant and walked to the
parking lot adjacent to the restaurant only to find that the parking lot was

101 |

she rose
closed with my car locked inside. My mind went into overtime trying to figure
out a solution to get out of this situation. The attendants were gone, the lot gate
was closed andlocked, and there was no one around to help nor a number to
call. All I knew was I couldn’t miss this flight to celebrate my baby. I went into
panic mode while Jermaine, theCalm and Collected reassured me it was going
to be okay. And we started calling the number on the building to find out the
owner of the garage. I started praying to God asking for a miracle. There was
no way I could tell my daughter I wasn’t going to make it on this trip. He called
911 to see if they could assist us. And minutes later someone walked out of the
building’s side door. We both screamed, “HOLD THE DOOR!” We startled
the man, but he so kindly held the door until we ran up the steps to get inside.
And there she was, Blackberry sitting there all by herself. We jumped in the car
and triedto get back in date mode but by this time, I started questioning God
is this a sign. I have NEVER had my car locked in the garage after a date. God,
is this a sign?

| 102

she rose

Chapter 11

STILETTO

STAND AND STILL STAND

My family and I left from my parents’ house so they could drop us off at
theairport. And when we arrived at the airport, I asked my father to give me his
phone. Yep,I took my father’s phone because he had AT&T and I had Cricket.
I knew I would not beable to talk to my new man for a whole week. When
my dad got back home, I had himturn his international service on so I could
make phone calls from Montego Bay, Jamaica.A small close group of us went
to celebrate my daughter. It was me, my daughter, her best friend, my niece
and her man, and my niece’s daughter. We were picked up by the driver who
took us to the resort. The ride was not smooth. It was a one lane road in each
direction with huge potholes causing a very bumpy ride. There were so many
nice people we met going to the same resort on the ride. I had my jokes and was

103 |

she rose

making everyone laugh. We got to the resort and were greeted with a refreshing
beverage. Whenwe got to our room, we went to freshen up and change clothes.
While I was waiting my turn, I called Mister. Of course, he was at work, but he
answered the phone. He had a soft, but masculine spoken voice over the phone
like he was trying to be sexy. I was like“Hey.” He asked if we made it, I told him
yes. Then I said, “I’m glad we just connected because you could’ve been on this
trip with us.” We continued to talk for another thirty minutes. At the end of the
call, I told him I needed to go so I could see what all was goingon and what we
were getting into. I told him I would call him back when we returned. Since we
were at the resort, there were several different restaurants on site, so we booked
a reservation for the first couple of nights for dinner. One night we had hibachi
and the next night we had Italian.

The day of my daughter’s birthday, we went off the property. I met a taxi
driver and talked him into giving my family a tour and I negotiated a cost he
agreed to. He showed us the countryside and areas where the native Jamaican
frequented, the non- touristy areas. He allowed us to stop, take pictures, and see
how they did their day to day. We saw people washing their clothes on the side
of the road. We saw the houses with their electricity draping from one house to
the next. Some houses were so small youcould look right through and see out
back. We saw goats everywhere along the road. I was able to get our driver, Alex,
to agree to come back and pick us up the next evening to take us to a very nice
restaurant on the water which turned into a club later that evening.

We went back to the resort to sit by the pool. Then we all decided to go and rest
for the evening. As we were walking to the room, my niece’s man pulled me to
the side and asked if he could talk to me for a minute. Everyone else went to
the room, while we stayed back at the bar. He proceeded to tell me how much
he was in love with my niece and how he cared so much for her daughter. He
asked me if I gave him permission to marry her. He wanted to propose to her
that night. I lit up with excitement and asked him, “Are you prepared to take
care of her and her child? They better not want for nothing. Are you prepared,
are you going to protect her, provide for her, and love her no matter what?”

| 104

she rose

Then I said, “You want to do it today, then you need to pull my daughter to the
side to get permission to propose on her birthday. We had to create a situation
so my niece wouldn’t be wondering what was going on. My daughter said yes,
absolutely that he should propose to her cousin that night.

We got dressed and everyone wore all white except my daughter who wore
a cuteshorts romper that was olive, brown with accents of white. We got to
the restaurant and started ordering our drinks. I ordered a rum punch. My
fourteen-year-old niece was sitting next to me. No one was paying attention
when she said I want what she’s having. Our driver was sitting off to the side
enjoying himself and hanging out with us. My daughter, her best friend and my
fourteen-year-old niece got up to go to the bathroom and I noticed my niece
was pimp walking like George Jefferson as she swung her long braids over her
shoulder. We were laughing at her and what we didn’t know was shewas a
little intoxicated and the waiter had brought her a real drink. My niece’s man
got up from the table and walked over to the DJ booth and was talking to him
for a while. My niece and I were left at the table, laughing, and enjoying the
Jamaican vibe by the water.

We hear the DJ say can we have everyone’s attention. The girls were just getting
back to the table. I was sitting where I could see everything from every angle.
My niece was on the right side of me with her back to the DJ booth. She could
hear him but did notsee so she had to turn her chair around. The DJ said we have
a special announcement andhe started playing some American slow jams that
her man requested. As the music dropped, we turned her around and he
was walking out with the mic in his handserenading her with these songs.
He put on a full concert singing Luther Vandross’ ‘If This World Were Mine,’
then followed up with ‘I’m Going to Make You My Wife’ and ‘Chocolate Girl’
by the Whispers. All my niece could do was sit there in complete shockwith
tears just streaming down her face. She didn’t know what was going on, but
you could see the joy in her face as her man walked toward her pouring out his
love through song to her. They put a spotlight on her as he got down on one
knee and pulled out a ring. You could hear the gasps of shock and sounds of

105 |

she rose

excitement from those around us.He looked her in her eyes and said, “Baby, I
love you. I want to marry you. Will you be my wife?” She sat there crying tears
of complete bliss as she answered him and said “Yes!” The entire room erupted
into cheers of congratulations.

Soon after, our attention was back on my younger niece while we questioned
the waiter about him giving her a real drink. He looked at us and
told us her drink was avirgin drink and that she was just acting. Next
thing we know the cleanup crew came in and started clearing tables
and clearing space to make room for the dance floor. We thought
they were trying to put us out. We forgot the restaurant turned into
a club. Ourtrusty ole driver was still hanging in there with us. I even
danced with him. We partiedand had my daughter in the center as
we surrounded her in our all-white dancing, winding, and enjoying the
atmosphere. Jereese’s father is a Jamaican, so the vibe is in herblood. Everyone
was watching and cheering her on as she got her groove on. We celebrated
and created wonderful memories she will never forget. People were coming up
asking if she was Jamaican because she was grooving so good, they just knew she
hadto be. She said no, but it’s in my blood. All of us danced the night away and
enjoyed hanging out with the natives.

At the end of the night our driver took us back to the resort. As promised, I
calledJermaine as soon as we got back to the room. We talked for about an
hour on my dad’s cell phone. Throughout the trip we spoke several times for
extended lengths of time. When we got back from Jamaica, I was headed right
back out of town to Myrtle Beach. But first, I had to return my dad’s phone and
change out bags for my next trip. I won theMyrtle Beach trip from the business
I was in at the time, and I had less than a day to get everything done between
trips. My sponsor and I were driving down and had some stops to make so
Jermaine made his way to meet us at one of our stops so he could see me before
leaving town again so quickly. A few weeks later my dad hit me with a $800
cell phone bill that I ran up while in Jamaica. All the calls were with Jermaine.
I had a good time in Myrtle Beach with my Lia Sophia family. We stayed in a

| 106

she rose

beach house with an elevator. Everyone enjoyed the entire week. While there we
celebrated the September birthdays. It was four of us being celebrated and we
partied good. We finally came backat the end of the week, and I was so glad to
finally be back home and find time for Jermaine.

Our routine of dating and seeing each other continued. Still, no one at the
church knew about us. Only our families knew we were dating. During
our dates, we wouldalways run into people I knew, and they all greeted
me with the same love and energy.It was because of this he suggested I
should throw my birthday party at the lounge wherehe, Robin and her
husband owned. It was a great idea, a nice place. I usually celebrated
my birthday out of town, but what the heck...let’s throw a party. I
immediately went intoevent planning mode and reached out to one
of my brothers who is a caterer. We set adate to meet to go over my
vision and do a tasting of different options I would have served at
my party. When we arrived at the tasting, we had to wait in the foyer
for mybrother Kevin, who was the caterer, to come and get us. I met
him when I was with myex. He had a flair for the extraordinary and
elegant. You tell him your budget and hework it all out. When Kevin
came out the elevator walking toward us, his eyes were wideand had a
grin stretched from ear to ear. I thought he was excited to see us, but
it wasbecause he knew Jermaine through a mutual friend of theirs and
he was shocked to seethat this is who I was dating.

When we got on the elevator, we went to the rooftop, and it was all set up
at a niceintimate table with tablecloth and decorations with the food options
ready for us to taste. It made me more excited about my actual birthday.
Kevin told me to bring photos of myself. He didn’t tell me what he was going
to do with them, but I knew whatever it was, it was going to be amazing. I
was turning thirty-nine and the celebration was going to beone for the record
books. I immediately started sending out the invitations for my birthday party.
Everything was set. The party was the Thursday before my birthday, comedy
night at the lounge.

107 |

she rose

I woke up excited. It’s party day. I still had to get my hair and nails done. I
laid out my outfit for the party. I decided to wear a little red wrapped dress
that fit every curve on my body. My heels were a cute classic pump in gold. My
hair style was so cute.My stylist spiked my short hair. The party started at 7:00
that evening but the doors opened at 6:30. So I arrived at 6:45 so I could get a
full look at everything before the nightstarted jumping and so I could greet my
guest. Low and behold to my surprise, the place was packed, standing room
only. The three owners were surprised that one person could bring so many
people out in one night. They never had a night with so many people, including
their grand opening according to my man. The host comedian was like family.
His niece and my nephew have children together. When he got on the mic, he
made jokesabout how the place was packed and so many people came out to
celebrate and support me. He was like “Whoa, we never had a turnout like this.
Only ReCe!” The food table was so eloquent and beautiful with black and white
linens. The table was in an L shape and my photos were strategically placed
throughout the setting. My cake was at the veryend. It was three square tiers
going up into a pyramid. The night went off without a hitch.All the comedians
were funny. I walked around greeting and mingling with all my guests. I went
from table to table ensuring I spoke with everyone. My cousin from New York
told me that my birthday present was two tickets to go see Eric Benet the next
day at The Birchmere. The night came to an end after midnight. I was ready to
go home and go to bed. I wanted to call out from work the next day, but since I
just took two weeklongtrips back-to-back, I couldn’t take off another day. I had
to build my leave back up.

I woke up the next morning and was ready for the day. IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!
I got up and said my morning prayers and thanked God for allowing
me to see another year.I moseyed on to work and to my surprise, my
team was throwing me a surprise birthday party. However, I had a lot
of work to do playing catch up on my orders from when I was on
vacation. My manager called me into his office to discuss the status of
my ordersand go over the monthly cell phone statements for the team. I
managed the purchase, billpay, and upgrades for all the team members’

| 108

she rose

cell phones at Washington Gas. My dayended up being so busy I didn’t
have time to enjoy the celebration. Everyone was pullingme in different
directions. I started getting frustrated and irritated. I left work two hours
early so I could beat the traffic and get ready for my evening. I went
home got dressedand the day just kept playing back in my mind how
everyone at work was doing thingsto get under my skin.

I went to Jermaine’s mom’s house to meet him for the concert, and I started
ventingto him at how crazy my day had been and how I felt my manager
was coming for me. Hetook me to his room and was trying to get me
to calm down. He sat me on the ottomanand told me to just relax and
not worry about it. He said it’s your birthday, you are supposed to be
happy. That is when he got down on one knee, looked me in my eyes and
said once he got everything clear with his situation, he wanted me to
be his wife. Hepulled out a ring and I was like, “Are you for real?” It only
took me a second to say YES!I was shocked because we had only started
dating 30 days prior, but I knew this was the man I wanted to spend the
rest of my life with.

Over the next few days and weeks, I was telling my friend Redz how tired I
have been. I would come home from work and take long naps. She said, “Girl,
you’repregnant!” My response to her was, “Nooo, I just need to detox and get
some rest.” Aftermy Lia Sophia team meeting one evening, I stopped at the 24-
hour CVS and got a pregnancy test. While I was there, I decided to get an I’m
thinking of you/I love you cardfor Jermaine. When I got home, he was sitting on
my porch, smoking a cigar, enjoying the beautiful night while waiting on me.
I kissed him, went into the house, and went straight to the bathroom. I pulled
out the package and the whole time in my mind, I knewI was not pregnant, I
just had to prove Redz wrong. I bought a two pack. I peed on the first one and
waited patiently for the negative sign to pop up. But a positive sign poppedup
in seconds. That can’t be right. It’s only been seconds. I took the second one,
and it came back positive too. It seemed like it came back quicker than the first
one. It’s just notpossible. I can’t be pregnant. These tests must be faulty.

109 |

she rose

After a few minutes I called Redz and was whispering in the phone, “Girl,
I just took two pregnancy tests and they both came back positive.” She just
burst out laughingand said, “I told you.” I responded, “Why did you jinx me?”
I told her to give me a minuteso I could go upstairs to figure this out. How was
I going to tell this man I was having hisbaby? I took the card out and wrote a
note on the inside of the card saying, “Thank you for coming into my life and
changing it. Thank you for making me your future wife. Today I want to say
congratulations, Dad. I love you.” I put the stick inside the card. Hewas still
outside playing soft music. I went outside, gave him the card, and watched him
as he opened and read it. He smiled and said, “For real?!” I was still in disbelief.
So muchwas going through my mind. My daughter just turned 16, he had
four sons. It was a lotto process. I have always been good about going in for my
wellness visits with my doctorannually around my birthday, so I already had
an appointment scheduled and didn’tneed to make a new one. Even then, I
was still thinking the doctor was going to tell me itwas negative and the tests
I took at home were faulty and giving a false positive reading.Unfortunately,
that was not what happened. My doctor told me I was very muchpregnant. I
said, “For real? Y’all sure?” They knew I was a joker, but at this moment I wasvery
serious. I just turned thirty-nine and my daughter just turned sixteen. I didn’t
have any plans to start over with a new baby. So, to confirm, they took the test
again and said,“Ms. Wilson, it’s positive.”

It was Halloween, all the kids were at the house and Jermaine was excited to
tell the kids about the baby. The boys and my daughter were sitting downstairs
in the diningroom. We were upstairs getting ready to go riding. Jermaine was
excited to go show us something he saw while he was working as the cable guy.
Jermaine went downstairs before I did. You could hear the laughter of the kids
coming to a halt. I stopped getting dressed for a minute and sat at the top of the
steps to eavesdrop. Jermaine said, we got something to tell y’all. The boys said
at the same time, “I hope it’s not another baby!” Mydaughter looked up at me.
Her stare was confusing. She waited for the announcement. Jermaine said we
are expecting a baby. Then, my daughter looked at me and said, “as long as my
lifestyle doesn’t change.” I assured her that her life will not change.

| 110

she rose

While I was pregnant, I was still selling Lia Sophia jewelry. I met a
young lady who was selling candles. I am a massage therapist and love
candles. I built another team with over 200 people in a few months. I
was working as a contractor for Washington, Gas,a Massage Therapist,
consultant for Lia Sophia and now Scentsy. It was not enough money to
keep my house. I was in over my head. I refinanced a few years ago. If I
can behonest. I was not being a good steward over my finances. I had to
sell my house. As youcan imagine, there were so many things and stories
that happened to us.

We have been going back and forward to prenatal care. They called
me High Riskbecause of my age. Jermaine was there for every doctor
appointment. Today is a big onefor him. We get to find out the sex of our
child. He has four sons. We are in the room, andI am laid on the table
ready for the sonogram. Jermaine is leaning on the wall all nervous.He
put his head back then looked over to me and said, “I want a girl, but
I know it’s aboy.” I looked at him with confidence and said, “I’m the
girl carrier.” The doctor cameinto the room and asked if we were ready
to find out the sex. We both took a deep breathand said Yes at the same
time. The doctor told me to relax as she put the cold gel on my stomach.
I shivered a little and then relaxed as she put the machine on my stomach
to seethe baby. Jermaine came over and held my hand as we looked
at the screen. We bothlooked at the screen at the silhouette and tears
started streaming down Jermaine’s face ashe leaned over and kissed me.
It’s a GIRL!

Though the doctor said I was high risk, I went through my pregnancy
without anycomplications. The day came to celebrate the coming of our
little girl and my sister, her godparents and a few friends threw me a
baby shower. So many people came out and Jermaine was so excited
because he was finally getting his little girl. We received everything we
needed to prepare for a newborn to be in the house. The baby shower
wasin February and three months later came our little joy, Jada. The day

111 |

she rose

I went into labor, Jereese was going for her Driver’s License. Jermaine,
Jereese and I got up and went to theMVA. She didn’t pass so we decided
to take her out to eat to cheer her up. After we ate, I told Jermaine I
wanted to stop at Target in Brandywine, Maryland and return some of the
duplicate items we received. While walking the aisle of Target looking to make
exchanges, my water broke, and I went into labor. I was in denial, but the water
kept trickling down my leg which I couldn’t ignore. The three of us left the store
and jumpedin the car to get to the hospital. We had to come from Brandywine
all the way to my attending hospital in Washington DC. Jermaine was driving
as fast as he could to get meto the hospital using all safety precautions. Good
thing there weren’t any police in sight.He was my personal ambulance while her
big sister was in the back holding on for dear life. Once we got to the hospital,
they took me through intake and immediately rushed me into a birthing room.
That is when they discovered my baby was breech which calledfor an emergency
C-section. Given the fact I had just eaten, I had to wait eight hours andthey
put me in a room and before they could take me to labor and delivery. Finally,
my beautiful chocolate baby girl was brought into the world. We were sent
home a day laterboth healthy and ready to live life. For the next six weeks, me
and my newborn stayed inthe house other than to go to the doctor’s office for
appointments. I am very old school and raised in the school of thought that you
do not go out and take your newborn aroundwhile you heal from giving birth.

I was glad when our six weeks was up so we could attend service on Sunday.
I’m a church girl, so I missed going to service and praising the Lord. See this is
before churches were streaming their services and you could watch from your
phone or computer. I had to get ready. I went to get my hair and nails done
Friday before service. I was going to make sure I showed up in ReCe fashion
with my newborn on my hip. AsI was on my way to get pampered, I realized I
left my cell phone in the house and turnedaround to go back to get it. I walked
in and went to my side of the bed. Bent over to unplug my cell phone from the
charger. I decided I wanted to grab something to drink before I left. I walked
out the room into the living room and looked into the kitchen and noticed all

| 112

she rose

of my drawers and cabinets were open. It startled me and I was confused not
realizing that maintenance was coming to the house. That is when I pivot to
turn around to go ask Jermaine who was sitting out in the car, a way down from
the door, if he realizedmaintenance was coming. That is when I saw an unknown
man, a robber, run from my oldest daughter’s room into my newborn’s room.

I had called Jermaine from my cell phone and hung up at the same time
picking up the house phone to call 911. 911 answered saying, “911 dispatch,
how can I help you?”The house was pitch quiet and the robber could hear the
911 dispatcher. As a former dispatcher, I knew to call back several times to get
the police rushed to my house. But thefemale 911 dispatcher was so loud, it
made the robber run from the bedroom with his face covered, running toward
me screaming RAAAHHHHHHH!! I started swinging my fist, kicking, and
yelling some ungodly words at the robber. He ran around me and ran out the
door. As I stand there trying to gather my nerves, Jermaine runs in, grabs his
gun, and starts running down the street looking for the robber. He was already
gone. The police finally arrived and took our statements. We were confused at
how something like this could happen. We lived in a secure building with no
front entrance. To get on or offany floor, you have to have a key fob to push the
button on the elevator and get to any floor. We lived on the sixth floor which
was the top floor. So how did he make it all the way up to our door? Was it
somebody in the building? Was it someone working for the complex? Since the
robber’s face was covered, I couldn’t even give a good description of what
he looked like. This was so unnerving and left a feeling of not being safe
where welived. You could only imagine I was angry. I didn’t want to stay
there or sleep there. My16-year-old daughter could have been there by
herself, and anything could have happened. I was ready to go. I could
not stay here any longer. We went on vacation to Myrtle Beach for a
week. When we returned, we moved to a new place.

Getting settled into our new place and this new life of raising my two
daughtersand being with my man. By the time my 40th birthday came,
I was ready to celebrate. Wewent to Jamaica to celebrate and two days

113 |

she rose

after my birthday we got married while stillin Jamaica. I was so elated,
I’s married now! We returned from Jamaica and it’s time forhim to go
to work...as a truck driver. He started his new job as an over the road
long distance truck driver. He started off working for a company
and we sat down and decided he would be better off starting his own
trucking business. We did the paperwork,purchased him his own truck,
and I gave him the name for his new business, J6 Enterprisewhich stood
for our four sons and two daughters which all except one name start
with a J. He began getting runs under J6 Enterprises and the business flourished
or so I thought.While Jermaine was on the road, I was a dutiful wife taking care
of home and ensuring our children were well.

I started noticing that the finances were not adding up. Bills were going unpaid.
I was hosting a Scentsy parties and had to change the venue at the last minute
to my goodgirlfriend’s house because the lights in the house we were renting
got cut off. At this point, I was frustrated, so we decided to start selling all my
stuff. I sold my brand-new grill, chaise lounge, dining room table, and so much
more. This cycle kept happening with different bills and living arrangements.
So, we moved, then we moved again. We thought we would move to Atlanta,
but instead we moved to the basement concrete floor of his mother’s home
sleeping on top of aerial rugs. His mother’s home was full. Other than me, my
husband, and our youngest daughter, there was his mother, his aunt andher
son, his niece, and her son. For a full year, every night I would put a blanket,
sheets, and pillows down to create some padding and cushion between us and
the cold concrete floor. In that year, his aunt passed from cancer which his mom
then had us move from the cold basement floor to the small upstairs bedroom
next door to her room. Now let mebe clear, no one knew the hell I was dealing
with. No one knew the hell I was going through. Every day, I got up, got
dressed, and walked out with my head held high. I wasat the lowest point in my
life with so much that was going on.

The team I grew in Scentsy started throwing daggers in my back not realizing
whatI was going through. I didn’t have the strength to be what they needed me

| 114

she rose

to be because I was too busy trying to cover my husband and save face allowing
him to lead. There were people on the team spreading rumors, tarnishing my
name and character. I was overwhelmed and trying to fight for the financial
security of my family. I took on extra jobs to help my family through. I wanted
to go home to my parent’s house, but my fatheris very old school and felt since
I was married that my husband should be responsible to find a place for us and
that a grown man was not welcomed to live under his roof, so on the floor it
is. On top of all of that, the number one person in my life was going through
mental deterioration known as Alzheimer’s. That person was my mom. At the
most critical time in my life when I would go to her and she would counsel me
and be there for me, I didn’t even have that. I was devastated and felt alone.

It was a season of one thing after another falling apart. My husband’s older two
sons’ mother decided it was time their dad took on more of a hands-on position
in their life. Mind you the oldest two are now young adults. To add insult to
injury, I received word from my job that our contract was not being renewed
and would end November 2015. When I shared this with my husband, he
assured me everything would be ok. So, Itrusted him. Why wouldn’t I? He’s my
husband, the head of our household. Though things seemed bleak, I wanted to
believe we would be ok and soon moving out of his mother’s home into our
own place. I was partially right. My husband’s brother decided to move back
home with his wife and sublease his rental home to us. I packed the little bit
of stuff we had fast and moved into the house. So now I just had to focus on
ensuringI had a new job to move into once the contract was up. By God’s grace,
the contract endedup being extended. Everything was working out. We had
enough room for the two oldersons to have a room, my baby girl had a room,
and space for our oldest daughter when she came home from school. I thought
things were starting to look up and I was making this house a home for us.

That is when the disrespect began. The boys did not respect me as their stepmother
and the woman of the house. They didn’t work and they ran through the house
like they owned it. If I went out with friends and bought back leftovers, they
would eat them without permission. The truck I purchased for my husband,

115 |

she rose

he was allowing the oldest son to take out and he repeatedly got stopped by the
police receiving ticket after ticket. Finally, the police impounded the truck and
my husband had to go to get it out. The oldest son would also stay out all hours
of the night coming into the house two or three o’clock in the morning. This
would break my sleep and they knew I had to get up early to get baby girl ready
and out to daycare so I could get to work. Both boys would call themselves
sneaking girls in the house. However, every time they came in and out,
especially in the middle of the night, the alarm would ring out front door open
or the sliding glass open. I knew every time they came in and out. I expressed
to my husband that he needed to get them under control, and they needed to
respect me. He said he would talk to them, but the behavior did not change.

One day I came downstairs and there was a girl standing in the middle
of my living room. I was there in my robe; it was three o’clock in the
morning and she waswearing a hooters uniform. She said she had just
got off work and I was standing therewith a look like you need to run
now in my eyes. I opened my mouth and in a motherlyway as I would
my daughters and told her to go home. She was about to walk out the
door and the oldest son jumped on the phone to call his father saying,
“You hear her, sheput my friend out.” I said, “You cannot have people
in MY house at three o’clock in the morning. And you’re about to
take her downstairs for what?” His father on the end ofthe phone just
saying “Alright, okay. Okay, alright.” All this craziness, now it’s time for
me to get Jada ready for daycare and myself ready for work.

After dealing with our family turmoil with the boys, new drama crept
up. My brother-in-law must have known how my husband was
and decided to no longer want to sublease to us. The owner of the
rental house stopped by and showed up with a new rental agreement
for us to sign. So, we moved out all of my brother-in-law’s furniture
and replaced everything with our choice of decor. Our agreement was
that my husband would take care of the rent and I would take care
of the household bills which had us being equal in what was put out

| 116

she rose

in our living arrangements. One day my husband showed up at my
job. I got excited. I thought he was there to surprise me, so I thought.
Later, I found out the joint bank account we had, he removed his name
and stopped his payroll from going into the account. This is the same
account I paid our daughter’s daycare from.

Eventually, the owner started coming by our house regularly for what
I thought was maintenance and upkeep of the home. I later found out
when a lawyer contacted us that our rent had not been paid in several
months. That is when it came to light that my husband was telling the
owner not to tell me anything because I was overwhelmed, stressed out,
and dealing with a lot on my plate. However, the owner was stopping
by looking for the rental payments and I welcomed him into the home
each time without knowing the truth.

A few months later after being overwhelmed I went to look for an
apartment. A two bedroom and I was approved to move in immediately.
I sat down with my husband and had a courageous conversation. I told
him that I was not going to go through an eviction. I told him about
the apartment and that I was taking our daughter with us, but his adult
sons could not go because they were grown men and wanted to live by
their own rules. I asked are you going with us or not? He said yes. On
September 14, 2016, wemoved into our new two-bedroom apartment
which was five minutes from the house we just left. Finally, I can get back to
some normalcy and my marriage can now grow. This should be a new beginning
for us. For a few months, things were turning around. We were in a better place,
but things still felt a little off. I was seeking guidance from listeningto spiritual
upliftment on periscope from Apostle John Eckhardt, Apostle Kimberly
Daniels, and a few others who were shedding light and enlightenment. Every
night I would fall asleep listening to the audio of Prayers That Rout Demons on
YouTube. Well,you know the old saying, just wait for the other shoe to drop. It
dropped and it dropped hard.

117 |

she rose

I woke up on Resurrection Sunday 2016 singing ‘Like the Dew’ by Judith
ChristieMcAllister. I hadn’t heard it anywhere, but I woke up with it
in my mind and started singing the song. We got up to get ready
for church. My husband and I attire would usually complement each
other. He would wear a bowtie that would match the colors of my dress.
When I asked him if we were going to coordinate, he stared at me with
a blankface and in a stern voice said NO. At this moment, it dawned
on me he was checked out.I didn’t know why, but I could sense he was
checked out. On our way to church, it wasquiet, and I just kept singing
Like the dew in the morning… When we arrived at church,the choir
went into praise and worship, and you wouldn’t believe what song they
startedsinging. Yup, you guessed it, ‘Like the Dew.’ As long as I have been
attending this church,the choir had never sung this song until this day.
On our way home, it was a quiet rideagain. He had a whole plan that
he was going to drop me off at home, change his clothesand leave back
out in my car. Not today! His car was sitting outside but he claimed it
wasinoperable. He wanted to justify leaving me in the house without
transportation while hewent to the Cigar Bar. Oh Baby! He was upset I
switched the game. I dropped him off atthe Cigar Bar after we all went
home to change our clothes. We went to one of my sister’shouses. We had
a ball! The children were finding Easter eggs in the backyard. The adults
were inside having a great time. My sister Tee & her daughter Nique
took my daughterhome with them because I had to work the next
day. On my way home I called my husband to let him know I was
on my way home and could pick him up. He did not answer. I called
back several times because I knew the bar could be loud. He eventually
called me back and said one of his friends is going to bring him home
around 11:00 pm. After I showered, I went to sleep because I had to get
up early for work. I woke up a littleafter midnight and realized he was
not home. I called him again with no answer. He called me back and
said he was with one of the guys on the security team about to go and

| 118

she rose

pick up our youngest son because his grandmother was being rushed to
the hospital.

Hours later, I had not heard back from Jermaine, so I called back again
with no answer. I called my youngest son’s mother to one make sure her
mother was okay. Also,to make sure Jermaine had him and they were on
their way. Then, it started to feel like alie. I started to think this man is
lying and I am going to kill him. I went to grab his gunand went to sit
in my car. I was ready for him and whoever was going to drop him off.
I was going to get them. Then I started to think he is not worth it. I am going
back to the house. When I got in the house, I stood at the kitchen counter with
his gun in my hands.I put the gun on the counter. I was facing the door waiting
to hear him unlock it. I didn’twant to hear any excuses. I was sick and tired of
him. I was not clear on what was goingon, but I knew it was not right. I picked
the gun back up. I am going to shoot him. He is going to die today. I was glad
my daughter was not home. You liar! You Cheat! You thief!You are a fraud. I came
to myself and put the gun back in the lockbox.

I called one of my pastor friends. I knew it was early, however, her husband
usually leaves for work around 3:00. She picked right up and asked me was
I okay. I saidNo, I was about to kill my husband. He is not home, and I had
his gun in my hand. She asked, where is the gun now? I said Pastor, I put it
back. I’m not going to do it because he is not worth it. She asked me where my
daughter was. I told her she was at my sister’shouse which gave the Pastor some
relief. At that moment I felt overwhelmed and began crying. I told the Pastor I
was going to be alright, and I was going to read my Bible. I turned to the book
of Job. Remembering that Job lost everything and even his wife wanted him
to curse God. I was at the lowest point in my life and married to a minister.I
could barely see the words on the pages because my tears were so big and just
welled my eyes. Pastor just wanted to make sure I was alright and in a better state
of mind. ThenI heard the door. Here he comes stumbling into the house. I said,
“Are you crazy!?” He walked into the closet area straight to the bathroom. He
took a shower, came back out and said, “I do not want to be married anymore.”

119 |

she rose

I said “Oh yeah. What’s her name?” Hereplied “No, it’s not nobody. I just don’t
want to be married to you.” He got in the bed asI continued to lay on the other
side. An aura of peace overcame me. I got up, walked to the other side of the
bed. Took his legs to the floor and told him “Get out!” He said he was not going
anywhere. I went to the washer machine and took his wet clothes out and put
them in a trash bag and gave it to him. I told him he was going out of here one
of twoways. Either you are going to walk out of here or I am calling the police.
He looked at meand said “Oh, so it was set-up? That is why you didn’t put my
name on the apartment. So, you could put me out.” He went on and left. On
his way out I told him he had a weekto come back and get the rest of his stuff. I
was done. He kept making up excuses of whyhe couldn’t come and get his stuff.

A few weeks later it was Mother’s Day. Jermaine hadn’t been back to the house,
and I was ready for his stuff to be gone. I woke up ready to take my girls
to the eight andten o’clock service so we could go to my mom’s church
by noon because they were honoring her for Mother’s Day. We were
walking out of service and my phone rang.

Me: Hello

Caller: Hi, may I speak to ReCe. I’m the woman that is sleeping with your
husband.

Me: What do you want with me?

Caller: Oh, I wanted to introduce myself to you. I am here at the church.

Now being who I am I wanted to knock her out, but by the time we got face
to face, I just asked her “What do you want?” She proceeded to tell me her
name was Dee. I am looking at her crazy and in disbelief because who comes to
somebody’s church to confront them. She asked me, “Do you know Donya?” I
replied “Donya Lofton?” She said, “Oh you know her?” I said, “I’m Jermaine’s
wife.” She proceeded to tell me that heis sleeping with Donya too. I said “Okay,
so what do you want with me? Y’all do what y’all do.” Then I decided to go back
inside the church because he was still inside. I wentto the back pass security

| 120

she rose

outside of the pastor’s study where he was standing. He lookedcrazy because
he saw me then he saw her hot on my trail. I asked him “Is this who you left
me for?” He said, “Uh hmm.” She was busy yelling at him saying Donya’s name
andasking him if he told me that he asked her to marry him? I paused because
I started thinking when we got together, he was still married, and I assumed it
was over because he told me it was. But this was sounding too familiar. I looked
at him and said, “So you’redoing the same thing to her that you did to me?”
Dumb dumb cosigning saying “Yup. Yup. He is doing the same thing.” Then
she threw out there asking him why he was cheating on her with Donya?

I told them, “I’m done. Y’all can have each other. I am not doing this.” I told
him to come get his stuff and I walked away. I went to find my girls so we
could leave. Clearly,he knew my job was coming to an end at the end
of the month. Instead of him believing in my entrepreneurial goals, he
just jumped to the next woman who thought would beable to take care
and fund his life. I found out later that she was also a truck driver. Now
I am without a job, without my husband, and not clear on what to
do next. I went to Detroit to be healed from all this pain. I was told by
a good friend I could come back andstay as long as it took. I came back
home from my visit. I decided that I would just moveto Detroit for a
fresh start, which would be in a few weeks.

On Father’s Day, the church was packed because it was the return of our
Pastor coming back after recovering from a major surgery. My oldest daughter
remembered the woman who stopped me on Mother’s Day as I was leaving
church. She came to the frontof the church, second row where I always sit and
said “mommy do you see this. He got that girl in here.” I had my hair pinned
up in a beautiful, elegant ponytail with some beautiful, studded earrings, and
a blingy necklace with my red satin baby doll dress accented with a belt to
accentuate my shape and some five inch bedazzle heels. I was looking like a real-
life black barbie doll. I jumped up out of my seat because enough wasenough.
You already have three ex-wives, and you think you are going to make this more
of a circus. She saw me coming and ran across the hall to the women’s bathroom

121 |

she rose
and locked herself in the stall. I walked in and told her to come out of the stall.
Everyone waslooking at me because I was a deaconess-in-training, and this was
way out of character for me. They had never seen me so worked up and angry
before.
A few seconds later Robin walked out of the stall to wash her hands and saw
me. She said “I thought that was your voice. Are you alright boo?” I looked
at her and said “you and your husband know what is going on. Don’t talk to
me.” Next thing you hear is a bunch of women screaming it’s a man in here,
it’s a man in her. Jermaine walks in like heis the captain save a hoe. He makes
her open up her stall and he walks her out like thatis going to save her. Not
today. I’m following behind then walking next to my husband as he is walking
his girlfriend out of the bathroom. Service started but you see so many people
standing around trying to get at him and her, including my sister, my niece,
and my daughter. I went to swing over him to grab her as I noticed that someone
was reachingfor him. He pushed my hand back and my nail scraped her. Out of
nowhere, one of my nephews came and lifted me off the ground with my feet
kicking. I was screaming for him to put me down. He said, “No auntie,” as he
took me back to one of the associate pastor’s offices and three pastors were in
there talking to me. A gentleman who was alsoan attorney told me “If you hit
her, she is going to press charges on you. Leave now and don’t come back. We
heard you were going to Detroit. Go and don’t come back.”

| 122

she rose

Chapter 12

RED BOTTOM

COVERED BY THE BLOOD YOU CAN’T
GO UNDER THE BLOOD

Get to the root of your issues. It is me! I was a thorn in my side. You have read a
lot of my life issues. The root is a seed of perversion planted at a very young age.
It was not the intent of God. A person who had sexual acts done to them did it
to me. Did she get help? I do not know. However, I called her and forgave her. I
was not covered by family members who allowed sexual acts to happen around
and to me. No, they did not do it to me. Well, a few exposed their genitals.
I didn’t understand the craving I had come from my first sexual encounter. I
realize I kept searching for it whether it was by myself,or with a woman or man.

123 |

she rose

I gave my issues to God. I put all of it on the altar. I asked Godto forgive me for
every sin! He has cast all my sins into the depths of the sea.

I truly loved the men I chose to marry. I wished it was unto death do us part.
In hindsight, it was unto death. I died to my old self. I forgive you for the hurt
and pain youcaused me. You chased me. I chose you. My self-esteem was so
low I did not realize myworth. However, I thank you both for giving me two
beautiful daughters. If it was notfor you, they would not be here.

No more choosing an emotionally unavailable person. I do not need a man or
woman to complete me. The love I was once looking for, only God can give it
to me. People of God… Repent. If you have never given your life to Christ, do
it now. Stop looking at the people who go to church and say they are the reason
you won’t go. They are the same ones in the club.

Here is my Prayer, Father in the name of Jesus, I thank you for everyone who
reads this book. Father, I thank you for the bread of deliverance. Your word
says we should notbe bound. We should not be controlled, manipulated, or
dominated. You have given us the power and authority to have dominion over
everything, except other people. I thank you Father God today, I decree and
declare great freedom to your people. The ones whohave been under the weight,
yoke, bondage, oppression, possession, and depression of the enemy. I let every
demon know right now as I ministered to God’s people who have read this
book, I ministered to them by the authority of Jesus Christ of Nazareth. I did
none of this on my own. I only do that by which the Holy Spirit gives me by the
name ofJesus. That authority is not of myself. The authority is from the King of
Kings and the Lord of Lords. Therefore satan, jezebel, every demonic host, every
prince of principalitiesmust flee. With God as our strength and our guiding
light, we can overcome and rise above our hardships 1 Corinthians 15:57
“But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”
In all these events all I ever wanted was love. No one and nothing could love
me like God’s love.

Seek God! Have a personal relationship with God.

| 124

she rose
I ROSE because HE ROSE!
In the natural = ReCe On Something Else!
In the spirit = I am going to Run On to See what the End is going to be.

She ROSE!

125 |