Advanced Placement English Language

Advanced Placement
English Language

And Composition

Exam Review
April 28, 2007
Broward County Schools

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A.P. English Language Types of Questions

and Composition • Whole Passage
• Specific Parts of the Passage
Multiple-Choice Questions

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Format of MC Section Whole Passage Questions

• There are typically four passages • The diction in the passage….
• There are on average 50-55 questions • The passage most directly resembles…
• You have 60 minutes to respond • Which of the following best describes the
• Accounts for 45% of your exam score
passage…
• The intended audience for the passage…

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Specific Parts Questions Level of Difficulty

• Analysis of a paragraph’s style • MC questions vary in level of difficulty
• Analysis of a primary purpose • Questions are NOT arranged by order of
• Analysis of tone
• Analysis of words or phrases difficulty as in some other tests (PSAT,
• Grammatical constructions SAT)
• Antecedents
• Relating one part of the passage to another
• Vocabulary in context

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1

Answering the Questions New for 2007

• Complete all the questions that you intend • Recognize the contribution and/or
to answer on one passage before rhetorical purpose of footnotes used in a
proceeding to the next one. passage

• Only return to unanswered questions if • NOT required to have memorized any
you have enough time remaining particular styles (for example, MLA,
Chicago, APA, etc.)

• Responsible for gleaning information from
citations

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2

Types of Multiple-Choice Questions

Questions on the whole passage

Which of the following best describes the passage?
(A) An appeal for the reader’s sympathy and admiration
(B) A brief overview of the methods that the author used
(C) A summary of the principles according to which the author worked
(D) A warning to the reader about the complexity of the ensuing work
(E) A challenge to those who would doubt the accuracy of the author’s work

The diction in the passage is best described as
(A) technical and abstruse
(B) lofty and learned
(C) pedestriasn
(D) colloquial
(E) scientific

The intended audience for this passage is most probably
(A) pious readers
(B) educated adults
(C) amateur writers
(D) professional poets
(E) book publishers

The passage most directly resembles the speaker’s sense of Parker’s style in its
(A) juxtaposition of disparate elements
(B) lyrical description of religion and art
(C) blatant mimicry of other writers’ techniques
(D) relentless insistence on a single theme
(E) reliance on abbreviated, staccato phrases

Questions on specific parts of the passage

Analysis of a paragraph

One prominent stylistic characteristic of the first paragraph is the use of

(A) metaphor (B) understatement (C) parallel syntax

(D) personification (E) euphemism

In the third paragraph, the speaker’s primary purpose is to
(A) assert her own qualifications
(B) develop an argument for more honesty in writing
(C) create an elaborate analogy
(D) introduce a new topic for consideration
(E) establish a hypothetical situation for analysis

The tone of lines 59-72 can best be described as
(A) tentative and prudent
(B) detached and ironic
(C) fervent and emphatic
(D) defensive and self-aware
(E) supportive and reassuring

Analysis of words or phrases

Which of the following best describes Johnson’s use of the terms “slave or
science” and “pioneer of literature” (lines 10-11)?
(A) The contrast between the two terms emphasizes the variety of possible responses to the

dictionary.
(B) Both sensationalize the difficulty of the lexicographer’s research.
(C) The difference between the two terms illustrates the range of the lexicographer’s experience.
(D) Both exaggerate the public’s lack of admiration for lexicographers.
(E) Each illustrated what is meant later in the sentence by “Learning and Genius.”

The “arrow” in line 38 is a metaphorical reference to
(A) unrequited love
(B) the envy of other female writers
(C) the self-doubt that writers sometimes experience
(D) a painful memory
(E) criticism from men

Grammatical constructions

In line 12, “who” refers to

(A) “unhappy mortals” (line8) (B) “mankind” (line 9)

(C) “pupil” (line 10) (D) “the slave” (line 10) and “the pionier”

(line 10) (E) “Learning and Genius” (line 12)

Which words, when inserted between “but” and “capable” (lines 7-8), best clarify the meaning of the
second sentence?
(A) as if
(B) becoming more
(C) by being
(D) which were
(E) that are

Antecedents

In line 17, “this negative recompense” refers to
(A) freedom from criticism
(B) gratitude from future generations
(C) personal satisfaction
(D) diligence as its own reward
(E) absence of recognition

Relating one part of the passage to another part

How is the second paragraph related to the first?
(A) It qualifies the generalization made in the first paragraph by challenging the scope of the

assertions.
(B) It refutes the assertion made in the first paragraph by presenting a contrary example.
(C) It continues the generalization made in the first paragraph by giving it a particular

application.
(D) It supports the assertion made in the first paragraph by citing the testimony of authority.
(E) It reiterates the ideas in the first paragraph while noting a possible exception.

Vocabulary in context

As used in line 46, “wanting” is best interpreted to mean

(A) desiring(B) capturing (C) lacking

(D) faulting (E) hunting
Use of Footnotes

The purpose of footnote 4 is to inform the reader that the quotation in line 49

(A) has been attributed to three different designers
(B) was first cited in 1918
(C) was the inspiration for an exhibit at the Brooklyn Museum
(D) is an article in The Machine Age in America 1981-1941 written by Harry N. Abrams, Inc.

Terminology from past AP Tests Multiple Choice Questions

D. Fettrow

Literary Terms/Rhetorical Strategies/Analysis/Purpose

abstraction diction parallelism
parody
action verb digression pathos
personal observation
alliteration discussion personification
praise
allusion (literary, distinguish proposal
pun
historical) emphasis qualifying
rebuttal
analogy enumerate refute
reveal
analysis enunciate scientific term
simile
anecdote expand on speculation
subordinate clause
antithesis expository summary (ize)
symbol
appeal to authority extending an example thesis
transitions
apostrophe fallacy undercut
understatement
argument extending a metaphor unfold
taking exception
assertion generalizations unqualified assertion
verbal irony
characterization hypothesizing

citing of authorities illuminate

colloquial expression illustrate

commentary image

comparison implies

concrete examples irony

context issues

counterbalance justify

critique juxtaposition

criticism narration

data onomatopoeia

deduction overstatement

description oxymoron

developing an argument paradox

Tone/Style Words brusque diffident
candid earnest
abashed celebratory effusive
abhorring choleric elegiac
abstract combative empathetic
admiring complex emphatic
adoring confusing enigmatic
affectionate contemplative entrapped
agitated confident erratic
ambiguous conciliatory euphoric
ambivalent condescending fatalistic
angry contemptuous fateful
annoyed cynicism fervent
antagonistic dangerous flippant
anxious defensive foreboding
apathetic derisive gloomy
apprehensive despairing growth
arch desperate hopeful
awkward detached hopeless
biting didactic hostile
blunt
boring

Terminology from past AP Tests Multiple Choice Questions

D. Fettrow

incisive nostalgic self-aware
indecisive objective sentimental
inflammatory ornamental skeptical
informative parochial solemnity
innovative passionate speculative
insolent personal straightforward
intimate pessimistic struggling
introspective pointed subtle
ironic prudent supportive
isolated reassuring sympathetic
jocund refined suspicious
jovial reflective tentative
laudatory resigned vitriolic
lethargic resentful vivid
lugubrious respectful whimsical
lyrical reticent wistful
mock solemnity sanguine wry
modest self-assured zealous
naive self-deprecating

Grammatical Construction parallel structure
prepositions
antecedent
subject of sentence

General Vocabulary emitting pervasive
entrepreneur phenomena
admonitions erratic preceding
advisability exalted predecessors
amplifying exclusive pretext
appease fateful profound
ascertain foreknowledge regal
awesome futility relentless
barrenness hostile resolve
blatant inanimate sensibility
burdensome interlocked serenity
concept intimidate staccato
conspicuous invalid subtle
contradictions linguistic subjective
contrived jeremiads surpass
depiction magnanimity tentative
definitive mimicry treachery
digressive monarch undaunted
discredit nomenclature undercut
discursive objective unique
dispense with particular unrequited
diverse perspective unsophisticated
dubious
dyspeptic









Sample Footnote Questions

1. Which of the following is an accurate reading of footnote 2?

(A) An article by John F. Kasson appears on page 427 of Engineering.
(B) “Machine Tools at the Philadelphia Exhibition” was published in New York.
(C) The article “Engineering” can be found on page 427 of “Machine Tools at the

Philadelphia Exhibition.”
(D) “Machine Tools at the Philadelphia Exhibition” is an article published in the May

26, 1876, issue of Engineering.
(E) Engineering is an article cited by John F. Kasson.

2. The purpose of footnote 4 is to inform the reader that the quotation in line 49

(A) has been attributed to three different designers
(B) was first cited in 1918
(C) was the inspiration for an exhibit at the Brooklyn Museum
(D) is an article in The Machine Age in America 1981-1941 written by Harry N.

Abrams, Inc.
(E) appears in a book written by Wilson, Pilgrim, and Tashjian and published in 1986

3. Taken as a whole, the footnotes suggest that

(A) the author of the passage wants the text to present highly technical material
(B) the author of the passage relies heavily on Kasson’s book
(C) very little was written about the topic of machinery and ornamentation prior to

1976
(D) engineering magazines are an essential source for technical writers
(E) except in rare cases, it is best to use the latest published work when documenting

an idea or concept

Answer Key:

1. D 2. E 3. B













A.P. English Language The Prompt

and Composition • The most wonderful essay ever written
CANNOT score in the high range if its
Effective Essay Writing for
Rhetorical Analysis and content is OFF PROMPT.
Argumentation
• Make sure you are reading the prompt
correctly and addressing what it is asking
of you.

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Types of Prompts 1. Read the Prompt

• Analysis (Rhetorical/Argument) • Read the prompt
• Argumentation • Read the prompt again
• Synthesis • Underline key words/phrases
• Number those elements that must be
“Students should read essay prompts as texts,
making certain they have understood what they are accomplished in the essay
• Do everything the prompt suggests;
being asked to do.” ~ M. Elkins
address every part of the prompt

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Sample Prompts w/Notation Analysis

• See Handouts • Rhetorical – consider tone, attitude, point
• Annotate the Prompt to discover and stay of view, techniques, diction, imagery,
syntax, language level
focused on your TASK(S)
• Annotate the passage according to the • Argument – consider tone, attitude,
strategies, emphasis, diction, imagery,
TASK(S) syntax, appeals
• Determine the Author’s Intent/Purpose in

the passage.

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1

General Analysis Terms Specific Terms

(Recent Exams) • Arguments
• Assumptions
• “Crafts the Text” • Sentence Structure; Syntax
• Rhetorical Strategies • Tone
• Most Compelling (Observation/Argument) • Point of View
• Strategies Used (to Satirize) • Detail
• “Conveys the Effect/Feeling/etc…”

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Consider Your Task Authorial Intent

• Analyze techniques • Consider Purpose
• Convey/Define Attitude • Consider Audience
• Achieve Purpose • Consider Occasion
• Effect on Audience/Reader • What is the RHETORICAL purpose of the
• Reveal Differences in Purpose
passage?
• What techniques of LANGUAGE does the

writer use to achieve that purpose?

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2. Read the Passage 3. Organization

• Annotate as you read • Think before you write
• Identify subject and examples used • DO NOT begin by restating, i.e., parroting,
• Mark diction – connotation and irony
• Use of/Choices in Imagery – parallel the prompt word for word
• Thesis need to be specific – how do the
themes and symbols
• Unusual Syntax and/or Punctuation purpose and language interact
• Connection and/or Organization of ideas, • Characterize the elements under analysis,

paragraphs, sentences don’t just list them

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2

Use Details/Examples Write about what you know

• Quote from the passage liberally • You cannot possibly explore every
• Use examples of diction, details, rhetorical device/technique the author has
used
assumption, figurative language, etc…
• Use short quotes – embed into your own • Select those for which you can explain the
function and purpose
statements
• Always explain the writer’s purpose in • Look for connections between the various
devices/strategies
including these devices

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Writing the Body ¶’s Focus on Function

• Be thorough and specific: ANALYZE • Don’t guess about the name of a device
• Do not simply “point out” strategies
• Explain how they are used • If you aren’t sure if the name is
• Provide examples from the text onomatopoeia or oxymoron or metonymy,
• Speculate as to why the author included then don’t use the term

them; what is their effect? • But do include the “buzz” and “loud
• How do they support the purpose? silence” and “the crown” …

• And then discuss HOW they contribute to
the selection

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A Good Length Style and Voice

• No magic number of paragraphs • Write to express, not to impress – use
• Divide into paragraphs – don’t write one long natural language

paragraph – find natural breaks and indent • Demonstrate that you understand style –
• Find a pattern of organization: order of show how the author developed the
selection to create a desired effect
appearance; words to phrases to paragraphs…
• WATCH YOUR TIME – you want to include • Maintain an economy of language – say
much with few words - CONCISION
language from the WHOLE passage

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3

Style and Voice (cont’d) Verbs that contribute

• Best to use third person (he, she, they), • Chronicles • Portrays
rather than first person • Delineates • Reflects
• Demonstrates • Specifies
• Try to use present tense when discussing • Depicts • Suggests
literature/written text • Exemplifies • Illustrates
• Features • DO NOT USE
• Write legibly – the readers cannot reward • Illuminates
you for what you do well if they cannot – goes, shows, tells
read it

• Let your work stand on its own merits – no
pity notes (“I was up all night,” etc…

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Argumentation Step One

• Defend – Support – agree completely • Determine the point of the author in the
passage
• Challenge – Dispute – disagree
completely • Develop you own position on that point
(Agree, Disagree, Qualify)
• Qualify – means to agree or disagree
except in certain circumstances • Choose the side for which you have the
most detail for support
• Choose the approach for which you can
find the most evidence. Take a stand. • This provides the details for you
Don’t straddle the fence. introduction

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Finding Evidence (details) Be Specific with Details

• If appropriate, find details from a variety of • Reasons – use illustrations
sources • Examples – include names, titles
• Incidents – include dates, places
• Use history • Facts/Statistics – DO NOT make them up!
• Use science • Personal Experience – don’t generalize;
• Use literature
• Use current events use names, places
• Use personal observation

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4

Use Quality Detail Organize the Argument

• Avoid inaccuracies – BE RIGHT!! • Write a strong thesis – state your position
clearly
• Add as many specifics as possible –
specific names, specific dates, specific • Formulate 3-4 paragraphs
titles • Admit the opposition – acknowledge the

• Be coherent – include only RELEVANT opposing argument
details….more is NOT necessarily • Make your points relevant and accurate
merrier…don’t include details that don’t • Add a conclusion
directly support your point

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Argument Intro Concession

• Write a short intro in which you… • Think of the argument the opposing side
might propose
• Explain the position of the author
• Be willing to concede a point
• Present your position and any background • Think of ways to acknowledge those
the reader needs to know
arguments and refute them
• Include a strong thesis – one that clearly • Might place after your introduction; don’t
presents the position (defend, challenge,
qualify) spend more than two sentences

• Do NOT repeat the prompt

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The Body Conclusion

• Start with the weakest and end with the • Write a brief conclusion in which you
strongest return - with force - to your position

• Divide your assertions into paragraphs • Try to come full-circle – return to idea you
with the appropriate support in each used/mentioned in your introduction

• Apply effective transitions to match the • Consider analogies to your point in the
organization of the content introduction to avoid merely repeating the
introduction

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5

Voice and Style - redux Answer the Question

• Generally, use a less formal style than • Look for key words
with analysis essays • Choose only one approach
• Use a variety of evidence
• Use first person, if it seems natural • Be specific
• AVOID second person - “you”
• Write naturally, past tense is okay
• Use exact diction (avoid non-specific

language “one,” “thing,” etc…)

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6

The study of rhetoric stretches back to classical Greece. Today the term is most commonly taken
pejoratively, meaning bombastic or exaggerated language. But rhetoric also has a neutral
meaning,—rhetoric as the art or science of persuasion by means
of stylistic and structural techniques. The study of rhetoric is
useful because it encourages us to think of writing (and speaking,
for that matter) as a series of strategic choices. Every attempt to
put words together includes choices about which words to use
and how to arrange them. In this sense all writers, like it or not, use rhetoric.

Even simplicity is a rhetorical and political choice: George Orwell, for instance, was a master of the
plain style, and used it to devastating effect in his political journalism and novels like 1984 and

Animal Farm (for more on the rhetoric of
simplicity, see Hugh Kenner, “The Politics of
the Plain Style,” in Literary Journalism in the
Twentieth Century, ed. Norman Sims [New
York: Oxford University Press, 1990]).

Rhetoric is also useful because it encourages thinking about one's audience. Different audiences
require different rhetorical choices. In the following section, I'll list some of the most pertinent
rhetorical techniques, or tropes, when writing for academic audiences.

Diction

Perhaps the first rhetorical choice a writer makes—and all writers make this choice, whether they
realize it or not—is diction, or what words to use. Different words, even if they ostensibly mean the
same thing, have different connotations, as the poet W. H. Auden well understood. And different
audiences have different expectations about appropriate diction. Academic writing requires a more
formal diction than everyday talk or journalism, and within academe writing in the natural sciences
requires a more formal diction than writing in the humanities. I'm no great fan of formality in
writing, but on the other hand one does need to know and respect the conventions of academe and
other professional forums for serious writing:

ORIGINAL REVISION

The layers of dirt were not messed up at all. The sedimentary levels were undisturbed.

In general, the more specialized training a profession requires, the more it develops its own jargon
as a way of differentiating those who have acquired the proper training from those who have not.
Twist a policeman's arm, for instance, and you still probably couldn't get him to say car or robber
or gun or hit or saw: long professional training has habituated him to vehicle, alleged perpetrator,
firearm, strike, and observed. This kind of Official Style diction is all around us. Students tend to
learn it as the epitome of "adult" discourse, and to go too far in incorporating it into their own
writing.

My general advice regarding diction is to prefer plain
to fancy unless the scholarly field expects a particular
word. Since appropriate choices vary within specific
disciplines, and sometimes between individual
scholars, my suggestion to students is to locate model

authors within their chosen fields, and study those authors' diction and other rhetorical strategies.
Your professors can help you find good models: ask them to recommend respected scholars who
write well. There are always at least a few in every field.

Parallelism

Parallelism is one of the most useful and flexible rhetorical techniques. It refers to any structure
which brings together parallel elements, be these nouns, adjectives, verbs, adverbs, or larger
structures. Done well, parallelism imparts grace and power to passage:

The prince's strength is also his weakness; his self-reliance is also isolation.

In Machiavelli's world, Sheldon Wolin observes, moral ends have been replaced by
ironies; answers have been replaced by questions.

The characters are all watching one another, forming theories about one another,
listening, contriving . . . .

One side sees Lincoln as a bold and shrewd leader, sincerely committed to abolishing
slavery; the other sees him as an opportunistic politician, concerned only to defend the
union in any way possible.

Problems with faulty parallelism are very common, because many people know (or think they
know) what they want to say, and don't scrutinize what they actually write. In the following
examples the parallel elements in the revisions are emphasized:

ORIGINAL REVISION

Someone acquiring knowledge is similar to Acquiring knowledge is similar to finding a new
finding a new path in a dense forest. path in a dense forest.

Machiavelli advocates relying on one's own Machiavelli advocates relying on one's own
strength, leaving as little to chance as possible, strength, leaving as little to chance as possible,
and the need to get rid of sentimental and ridding oneself of sentimental attachments.
attachments.
Touchstone satirizes courtly manners, woos
Touchstone satirizes courtly manners, woos Audrey, and tries to avoid marriage.
Audrey, and he tries to avoid marriage.

One frequent source of trouble is nested lists—when one sublist occurs within another list. The
writer of this sentence lost track and thought the final comma signaled the last item in the main list:

Open faculty positions are advertised in all regional city and community newspapers, in
national outlets such as the Higher Education Journal, the publications of the Hispanic
American Association of Colleges and Universities, and the African American

Association of Colleges and Universities.

The trick is to recognize that this is actually a nested list and maintain parallelism within each list:

Open faculty positions are advertised in all regional city and community newspapers and
in national outlets such as the Higher Education Journal and the publications of the
Hispanic American Association of Colleges and Universities and the African American
Association of Colleges and Universities.

The list is technically okay, but its complexity makes it a bit hard to read. One could rearrange the
list to emphasize different elements and allow some pauses.

Open faculty positions are advertised in all regional city and community newspapers, in
national outlets such as the Higher Education Journal, and in targeted outlets like the
publications of the Hispanic American Association of Colleges and Universities and the
African American Association of Colleges and Universities.

Note that among other changes the revision adds the word targeted, which makes it easier to get the
list's logic. As ever, revision is equal parts rewriting and rethinking.

One other problem with parallelism is fairly common, though this is a stylistic rather than a
grammatical lapse. Writers often repeat too much in the parallel elements, detracting from
parallelism's economical elegance:

ORIGINAL REVISION

Socrates led a private life, as opposed to a public Socrates led a private rather than a public life.
life.

Parallelism can be employed in many different ways. One spin is inversion or chiasmus, in which
parallel elements are carefully reversed for emphasis. A famous example comes from President
John F. Kennedy's inaugural address (1961):

Ask not what your country can do for you—ask what you can do for your country.

Inversion often gains power by focusing attention on the ends of sentences, where readers and
listeners naturally pause. Kennedy's example shows this, as does the next example, from a 19th-
century religious leader defending his honesty despite his change of religion:

I have changed in many things: in this I have not.

By putting the prepositional phrase in this at the beginning of the second clause, the speaker is able
to end on that emphatic final not.

Repetition

Repetition is one of the most useful tools available to writers. Repetition allows a writer or speaker
to hammer home an idea, image, or relationship, to force the reader or listener to pay attention. Two
classic examples of the incredible power of repetition are Mark Antony's "They are all honorable
men" speech in Shakespeare's Julius Caesar (3.2), and Martin Luther King, Jr.'s "I have a dream"
speech at the steps of the Lincoln Memorial in 1963.

But many writers, especially young writers, fear repetition, apparently believing that repeating a
word within a single sentence or short passage is bad style. H. W. Fowler, author of the old but still
recommended Fowler's Modern English Usage (1st ed., 1926), called this tendency elegant
variation, and observed, "There are few literary faults so widely prevalent."

Here's an example of a student working hard to avoid repeating words within a sentence. It doesn't
work well; the revision repeats words and reads more easily:

ORIGINAL REVISION

The test group got an average of seven test The test group averaged seven correct answers;
questions correct; the mean for the control the control group averaged thirteen.
category was thirteen valid responses.

The original's nervous avoidance of repetition (for instance using first group and then category)
makes it a bit hard to follow. The revision, by contrast, is easier to follow because it repeats words
and syntactical structures. Note that repetition allows the writer to cut some repeated elements and
focus attention on the key information, the contrast.

Practiced writers will also employ all sorts of variations on this pattern of repetition:

The test group averaged seven correct answers, the control group thirteen.

The test group averaged seven correct answers to the control group's thirteen.

Another example of a writer afraid of repetition:

ORIGINAL REVISION

First the North Koreans made an incursion First the North Koreans drove almost all the way
almost all the way down the peninsula; then down the peninsula; then American and South
Americans and South Korean forces drove back Korean forces drove back into the north.
into the north.

In the revision, the writer realizes that repeating the verb drove helps reinforce the passage's
symmetry.

Let's close with one of the classic
instances of repetition, from a speech
by Winston Churchill after the British evacuation from Dunkirk in 1940. France had fallen to Nazi
Germany, the United States was still neutral, and Britain stood alone:

We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans,
we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend
our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the
landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills;
we shall never surrender. . . .

Churchill's thundering we shall fights fall like hammerstrokes, building to that emphatic, defiant,
and irresistible we shall never surrender. In 1940 Churchill's rhetoric was perhaps the most
important weapon deployed against Adolf Hitler.

Using tenses consistently

Tense refers to the time (past, present, or future) in which actions occur. If you start a passage in
one tense, don't change the tense without reason:

ORIGINAL REVISION

Though Machiavelli has said that religion is Though Machiavelli says that religion is vital to
vital to politics, he dismisses Christianity as politics, he dismisses Christianity as harmful.
harmful.

The historical present

One convention in academic writing that often gives students difficulty is what tense to use when
discussing a text. One's first inclination is probably to use the past tense when discussing a book
written in the past. But that's not what is usually done. Most textual analysis and commentary is
written in the present tense, a convention sometimes called the historical present:

ORIGINAL REVISION

Machiavelli also said that Christianity made Machiavelli also says that Christianity makes
people slothful. people slothful.

Hamlet told Ophelia he never loved her. Hamlet tells Ophelia he never loved her.

But just to complicate matters, you don't always use the present tense in discussing a work. When
you're presenting facts on its composition, you should use the past tense:

ORIGINAL REVISION

Machiavelli writes The Prince in 1513. Machiavelli wrote The Prince in 1513.

This also often holds if you're simply mentioning a work in passing, as support for some other
argument:

ORIGINAL REVISION

A century before the U.S. Constitution was A century before the U.S. Constitution was
written, John Locke articulates a vision of written, John Locke articulated a vision of
liberal government in his Second Treatise of liberal government in his Second Treatise of
Government. Government.

But if you went on to discuss Locke's Second Treatise in some detail, you might then switch to the
historical present after this initial mention:

Efforts to safeguard individual liberty have a long history. A century before the U.S.
Constitution was written, John Locke articulated a vision of liberal government in his
Second Treatise of Government. In this famous work, Locke locates the origins of
government in the desire to safeguard individuals and their property against the violence
and insecurity of the state of nature . . . .

Alliteration

Alliteration means beginning two or more stressed syllables with the same letter or sound:

Throughout the play we are made to witness the force of politics to shape and shatter
lives.

As with any rhetorical techniques, alliteration doesn't make an argument more intelligent. Done
well, however, it can please your reader and help make him more receptive to your argument. Like
a strong spice, alliteration should be used sparingly.

The rule of three

This is an old trick of the trade that doesn't get mentioned a lot nowadays (it's called tricolon in
classical rhetoric), but that crops up all the time in good
writing. The idea is simple: lists of all kinds (of things,
qualities, actions, reasons, examples, etc.) tend to come
across most powerfully when they contain three items. Of course that doesn't mean you should
manipulate your material to make it fit. Sometimes you'll want to put two, four, or more items in a
list. But when you've got flexibility in what to say, keep the rule of three in mind:

Coriolanus doesn't hide his contempt for the commoners, he doesn't flatter them, he

doesn't try to soften his image.

A generation ago most scholars believed that an overarching worldview—conservative,
deeply Christian and essentially medieval in its commitment to order and hierarchy—
shaped the concerns and defined the intellectual limits of Shakespeare and other
Elizabethan dramatists.

The third term is often slightly larger in its focus than the first two, enfolding them to make a more
general point.

Humor

Humor and other flourishes like slang should be used sparingly. Academic writing has room for wry
observation and ironic observations, but belly laughs and outright jokes don't tend to go over very
well. Something that seemed hilarious when you were writing it will likely seem foolish in the cold
light of day.

First and second person

Are the first and second person (I, me, my; we, us, our; you, your) appropriate in academic writing?
As for the first person, yes, as long as it is used properly. It occurs in much writing even in the hard
sciences. Scientists frequently speak of "our research" and "our findings" (though some teachers and
editors agree with Mark Twain's disdain for the editorial "we"). As for the first person singular, one
finds it even in the most serious scientific writing. E. O. Wilson, a prominent Harvard biologist,
notes his formal use of the first person, but also the limits he observed: "very little emotion was
expressed beyond the occasional 'I was interested in the problem of . . .' or 'It turned out, to my
surprise, that. . . .' " Thus both sides of the debate over the propriety of the first person are in a
sense right: it's okay to use I even in the most formal settings, but not to venture into editorializing
and emotion. In less formal academic settings (including student writing, by and large) and in some
fields like literary studies, it's even acceptable to write with a certain amount of personal reaction
and feeling. The right amount of "me-ness" in one's
writing will vary from field to field, journal to
journal, teacher to teacher: as you gain expertise in
a particular field, you'll learn what the rules are.

You is rather a different kettle of fish. It really doesn't belong in the most formal academic writing.
Directly addressing the reader changes the dynamic of the essay or paper. In the hard sciences this
would rarely be appropriate, though in the humanities one finds the second person more often. I
happen to use it a fair amount (in part because one of my favorite old authors, Machiavelli, used it
very cleverly), but others will see it differently.

Questions and exclamations

Direct questions work well in academic writing, but exclamations don't. See the discussion in
Punctuation for further thoughts.

Placing emphasis

If you want to summon up emphasis, a far better technique than exclamation marks is to take
advantage of the natural rhythm of English sentences. Here's an important rule good writers know
explicitly or implicitly: he end of a sentence packs the most wallop. The most common sentence
patter puts familiar information at the beginning of sentences, and new information at the ends of
sentences. Thus each sentence can be seen to be a kind of little bridge to what has already been
presented: the sentence starts out on familiar ground and then takes a step forward. Good writing
consists of linking these many little steps into a sustained argumentative journey (of course with a
few bold exceptions every so often).

These two paragraphs are identical except for their final sentences:

ORIGINAL REVISION

True capitalists distrust governments, and don't True capitalists distrust governments, and don't
think they make good arbiters of morality. They think they make good arbiters of morality. They
believe that individuals are best qualified to believe that individuals are best qualified to
manage their own lives and pursue happiness in manage their own lives and pursue happiness in
their own way. Freedom is what capitalists their own way. In other words, capitalists
believe in, in other words. believe in freedom.

The original throws away its energy in that last sentence because freedom comes right at the
beginning of the sentence. The revision saves its new mention for the sentence's natural emphasis
point, its end. The principle is of fundamental importance: start sentences with familiar material,
end with new.

There is much more to be said about rhetoric. If this brief introduction has piqued your curiosity, I
urge you to study the topic further, to read lots of good published writing (I recommend, for
instance, William Safire's scintillating style in
his op-ed columns in the New York Times),
and to experiment with your own prose. At its
best rhetoric is not "phony" but a worthy art
that recognizes the beauty and power of
words. Writers who know how to use rhetoric
understand that audiences want to be enchanted at least as much as they want to be taught. Rhetoric
can help you persuade. Take advantage of it.

Rhetorical Strategies

Argument: All texts contain an argument, whether implicit or explicit. Finding it will
depend upon identification of the author’s motive and his audience.

Explicit argument: an obvious argument
Implicit argument: a less obvious, often hidden, argument

Themes: Linking devices that hold a text together structurally; e.g., the battle between
good and evil.

Repetition of certain words: Why, with all the words at his or her disposal, does a writer
choose to repeat particular words?

Counterpoints: contrasting ideas such as black/white, darkness/light, good/bad.

Imagery: Strong visual impressions created through words, frequently using color.

Introduction and conclusion: framing strategies.

Narrator: Usually first or third person. Is the narrator the same as the author?

Style, tone, voice: Gut reactions are useful here. Examine your own response. What is
it that makes you respond as you do? Are you the author’s intended audience? If not,
who is?

Rhetorical Modes

Each mode suggests questions that can spark ideas by opening up different
approaches.

♦ Description: How does the subject look, sound, smell, taste, and feel?

♦ Narration: How did the subject happen?

♦ Example: How can the subject be illustrated?

♦ Division or analysis: What are the subject’s parts, and what is their
relationship or significance?

♦ Classification: What groups can the subject be sorted into?

♦ Process Analysis: How does the subject work?

♦ Comparison and Constrast: How is the subject similar to or different
from something else?

♦ Definition: What are the subjects characteristics and boundaries?

♦ Cause-and-Effect analysis: Why did the subject happen? What were its
consequences?

♦ Argument and Persuasion: Why do I believe as I do about the subject?
Why do others have different opinions? How can I convince others to
accept my opinion or believe as I do?



Great Books/AP Language Annotation
Ms. Walz

Annotating Text

Annotate: v. an·no·tat·ed, an·no·tat·ing, an·no·tates v. tr.
1. To furnish (a literary work) with critical commentary or explanatory notes; 2.
add explanatory notes to or supply with critical comments; "The scholar
annotated the early edition of a famous novel" 3: provide interlinear
explanations for words or phrases; "He annotated on what his teacher had
written.” n. an-no-ta-tion

Possible elements to “annotate” in a text: • connections to current events
• connections to your own life
• figures of speech • connections to other things
• tone
• shifts in tone you’ve read
• shifts in thought • symbols
• conflicts in scenes • recurring images
• goals and motivations • color imagery
• describing the import of • thesis (non-fiction)
• main ideas
statements and actions • provocative statements
essential to understanding a • character descriptions
character • points of contention
• discriminating between stated • multiple meanings
(or assumed) intentions and • voice
concealed intentions • syntax
• identifying and explaining • effective use of language
instances of irony • anything else that the reader
• rhetorical devices/strategies
• author’s use of diction (word intuits is of significance to
choice) understanding the text
• vocabulary (unfamiliar words)
• dialect

(Source: Warren J. Bowes, Chippewa Falls Senior High School, Chippewa Falls, WI.)

SYNTAX

Syntax is the arrangement of words in meaningful patterns. The arrangements normally follow
the accepted rules of grammar usage (the patterns of grammar). We generally don't need to pay
much attention to syntax in conversations and writing because following the rules is so basic to
the use of language that we have a breakdown in communication if the patterns of grammar are
not observed correctly, thus resulting in a "what did you say?" response. However, knowledge of
how syntax works can help us understand how it affects communication We need to examine the
concept of syntax in two ways:

1) Analyzing our own use of syntax to correct or improve our writing.

2) Analyzing an author's use of syntax to achieve a particular effect.

Words are symbols of ideas, but they do not begin to "say" anything until we put them together.
Sentences, which are syntactical units composed by words, "say" something, partly because of
the lexical content (the meaning) of the words and partly because of the grammatical forms that
govern words put together in patterns. If a basic grammatical competence has been established,
you are ready to develop the rhetorical competence to compose effective sentences. Rhetorical
competence plays its part in the writing process when there are choices to be made from among
two or more grammatical possibilities. Stylistic variations in the syntax of the sentence cannot
ignore the grammar of the language. Any changes you make must be grammatical (Cohen).

Improving writing

Analyzing our own use of syntax is probably the more difficult of these tasks. As we learn
language when we are very small, we internalize the rules of grammar. For example, we learn
that saying "Me up, Mama" is more likely to get us held by mother than "Up, Mama, me." By the
time a student is in high school, s/he has been speaking English for quite a number of years, and
is quite effective at basic communication tasks.

The problems surface when we begin formal writing tasks and a teacher tells us we have
"misplaced modifiers" or "dangling modifiers" or that our sentence structure isn't "parallel."
Many students have no idea what these terms mean, and therefore have difficulty identifying
these problems in their own writing. These messages generally mean that the student needs to
look closely at the way s/he has put together the words in a sentence to evaluate how clearly the
meaning is being communicated.

A major cause of scrambled syntax is a bad connection between the beginning and ending of a
sentence - an ending that seems to have forgotten how it began. For instance, in the sentence,
"Depending on how the vote goes will determine if our side wins," if we respect the beginning,
our result will go along these lines: "Depending on how the vote goes, our side may win." If we
respect the ending, the result will probably be: "The vote will determine whether our side wins."
Consider this sentence: "To a conscientious student is a desire to get the assignment done,"
which we might revise as "To a conscientious student, getting the assignment done is very
important" or "A conscientious student always wants to get the assignment done." (Sherbert)

Consider the following sentence: The dog bit the man. The meaning is clear; the dog performed
the action of biting and the man received that action. Now add in these words: Ferocious,
uniformed, baring its teeth, delivering the daily mail. The first two words are easily
incorporated into the sentence: The ferocious dog bit the uniformed man. But the two phrases
can be easily inserted in places that confuse the meaning of the sentence:

Delivering the daily mail, the dog bit the man.

OR –

The dog bit the man baring its teeth.

Both of these are examples of misplaced modifiers. The first example says that the dog was the
one who was delivering the daily mail. The second example says that the man was baring his
teeth. These errors are easily corrected, as long as the student is thinking as s/he reads what s/he
has written and paying attention to the structure and meaning of his/her sentences.

Analyzing syntax in literature

When we examine an author's use of syntax in order to achieve a particular effect in his/her
writing, we are evaluating tangible devices which the author may have manipulated to create an
emotional or intellectual effect. How the author organizes the words creates meaning and effect.
Analyzing the way in which the meaning has been communicated to us and the effect it has on us
allows us to more fully appreciate the author's work in crafting that piece of literature.
Examining the author's choices in his/her arrangement of words allows us to better understand
the author's message. Sentence length and patterns&emdash;rhythm, parallelism, word order--all
contribute to the emotional effects of a literary passage. They create connections between the
words, which creates meaning.

What do you look for? The following are common techniques for manipulating syntax:

• unusual (inverted) or unexpected word order. Poets in particular are fond of inverting
word order to make it sound "poetic", rather than just ordinary speech. Look at the
opening line of Robert Frost's poem "Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening": "Whose
woods these are I think I know." Frost has avoided conventional word order by reversing
the two units of four words (I think I know whose woods these are).

• sentence length (especially variations in the length of sentences)
• punctuation. Where do commas, semi-colons, and periods fall within the sentence? What

is the relationship between punctuation and stanzas in a poem?
• perspective (point of view)
• interruptions
• parallel structure (creates balance and emphasis - "I came, I saw, I conquered.")
• use of similar words (for example, a series of sentences or lines of poetry beginning with

participles - running, jumping, sliding - give a sense of continuous motion)
• a shift in word order (generally signals an important idea)

• word order that imitates the action the words described (mimetic syntax). Notice how
E.E. Cummings uses mimetic syntax in this poem:

o Me Up At Does

Me up at does

out of the floor

quietly Stare
a poisoned mouse

still who alive

is asking What
have I done that

You wouldn't have
In order to make sense of this poem, we must first rearrange it in conventional syntax. We
can begin with the subject of the sentence in something like the following manner: "A
poisoned mouse, who, still alive, is asking what have I done that you wouldn't have, does
quietly stare out of the floor up at me." By inverting and fracturing syntax the way he does,
Cummings surprises us into looking more closely not only at his language, but also at the
experience it conveys.
The emotional and intellectual experience in reading Cummings' original poem and our
revision differ significantly. Cummings' redistribution of words on the page and his unusual
syntactic arrangement compel us to look more deliberately at his subject. We are made to see
much more clearly the mouse's point of view. Instead of a speaker looking down at a mouse,
Cummings creates a perspective in which the dying mouse is looking up at his executioner.
The reversal of perspective is accentuated by the reversal of grammatical subject and
predicate, the dispersal of phrases in short poetic lines, each of which focuses on one small
aspect of the experience. (Sherbert)

Bernard Cohen breaks down evaluation of writing style into two main sections: choice of
diction and arrangements of words in sentences. He gives the following list of items for
examining diction and syntax:

A. Kinds of diction
1. General or specific
2. Abstract or concrete
3. Formal or informal
4. Latinate (usually polysyllabic) or Anglo-Saxon (usually monosyllabic)
5. Common words or jargon
6. Referential (denotative) or emotive (connotative)

B. Length of sentences (measured in number of words)

C. Kinds of sentences
1. Grammatical: simple, compound, complex, compound-complex
2. Rhetorical: loose, periodic, balanced, antithetical
3. Functional: statement, question, command, exclamation

D. Variety of sentence patterns
1. Inversions
2. Sentence openers
3. Method and location of expansion

E. Means of articulating sentences (coherence devices)

F. Use of figures of speech

G. Paraphrasing
1. Length (measured in number of words and number of sentences)
2. Kind of movement or development in paragraphs
3. Use of transitional devices

Syntactical patterns such as words organized around the mental associations of the poem's
speaker, rhetorical persuasiveness which suggest a carefully worded argument to persuade
the audience, syntax designed for poetic smoothness or abruptness - all are intended to be
expressive. "They intensify our experience in reading poetry and prose; they alert us to
meanings that go beyond individual words and sentences to include the intellectual and
emotional implications of unusual verbal arrangements" (Sherbert).

Works Cited
Cohen, Bernard. Writing About Literature. Bev. ed. Glenview: Scott, Foresman, 1973.
Sherbert, Pat. "Structure in Syntax." Handout for A.P. English-Literature and Composition
Institute. 2000.

Diction and Tone

Diction is defined as a writer's choice of words. The particular words an author uses will affect
not only the message the audience (reader) receives, but the way in which we interpret that idea.

Words have two meanings:
¾ denotation; the dictionary definition; the literal meaning of the word as a representation
of a person, place, thing, idea, or action.
¾ connotation; the implied meaning of a word. An author's communication of connotative
meaning is usually made clear through context (the surroundings of a given word or
image and its relationships to specific elements in its verbal environment) (Sherbert).

Douglas Hunt gives us a clear explanation of the difference between denotation and connotation:
¾ The denotation is the direct, specific meaning of a word or phrase: the literal meaning.
¾ The connotation is everything else: the implications, the suggestions, the associations, the
overtones. When [William] Stafford [in his poem "Traveling Through the Dark"] says
that his car "aimed its lowered parking lights," the denotation is merely an image of a car
with its parking lights on, but aimed implies (for me, at least) an intention on the car's
part, and lowered suggests the lowering of eyes. Combine this with the next line;"under
the hood purred the steady engine" and you have language that denotes a car but connotes
an animal.

Diction is classified into four levels:
(the following definitions are taken from "Glossary of Literary Terms: A-E")

1. Formal diction; a dignified, impersonal, and elevated use of language. It is exacting in its
adherence to the rules of grammar and uses complex vocabulary.

2. Middle diction; still follows the rules of correct language usage, but is less "elevated." It
reflects the way most educated people speak.

3. Informal diction; the plain language of everyday use. This often involves idiomatic
expressions, slang, contractions, and simple or common words.

4. Poetic diction; Poets sometimes use an elevated diction that is significantly different from
the common speech and writing of their time. These can be words that are chosen (or
sometimes created) by the poet because they have a special "poetic" quality - an ability to
communicate a complex thought in a word or phrase.

Note that words have both denotative and connotative meanings at all four levels of diction. The
level used by an author to communicate his/her message will depend a great deal on the message
to be communicated, the intended audience, and the form of communication (i.e., formal
speech/address, story with characters and dialogue, or poetry).
The connotations of words have great rhetorical value; for example, in prompting the emotional
appeal of a discourse. Robert H. Thouless has ably demonstrated the emotional value of
connotations in his analysis of the diction in two verses by John Keats:

In THE EVE OF ST. AGNES, Keats has written:

Full on this casement shone the wintry moon,
And threw warm gules on Madeline's fair breast.

These are beautiful lines. Let us notice how much of their beauty follows from the proper choice
of emotionally colored words and how completely it is lost if these words are replaced by neutral
ones. The words with strikingly emotional meanings are CASEMENT, GULES, MADELINE,
FAIR, and BREAST. CASEMENT means simply a kind of window with emotional and
romantic associations. GULES is the heraldic name for red, with the suggestion of romance
which accompanies all heraldry. MADELINE is simply a girl's name, but one calling out
favorable emotions absent from a relatively plain and straightforward name. FAIR simply means,
in objective fact, that her skin was white or uncolored; a necessary condition for the colors of the
window to show; but also fair implies warm emotional preference for an uncolored skin rather
than one which is yellow, purple, black, or any of the other colors which skin might be.
BREAST has also similar emotional meaning, and the aim of scientific description might have
been equally well attained if it had been replaced by such a neutral word as CHEST.

Let us now try the experiment of keeping those two lines in a metrical form, but replacing all the
emotionally colored words by neutral ones, while making as few other changes as possible. We
may write:

Full on this window shone the wintry moon,
Making red marks on Jane's uncolored chest.

No one will doubt that all of its poetic value has been knocked out of the passage by these
changes. Yet the lines still mean the same in external fact; they still have the same objective
meaning. It is only the emotional meaning which has been destroyed.

Consider this example, in which H. L. Mencken in prose is seeking to influence our attitude
toward a certain kind of teacher:

Such idiots, despite the rise of "scientific" pedagogy, have not died out in the world. I
believe that our schools are full of them, both in pantaloons and in skirts. There are
fanatics who love and venerate spelling as a tom-cat loves and venerates catnip. There are
grammatomaniacs; schoolmarms who would rather parse than eat; specialists in an
objective case that doesn't exist in English; strange beings, otherwise sane and even
intelligent and comely, who suffer under a split infinitive as you or I would suffer under
gastro-enteritis. There are geography cranks, able to bound Mesopotamia and
Baluchistan. There are zealots for long division, experts in the multiplication tables,
lunatic worshippers of the binomial theorem. But the system has them in its grip. It
combats their natural enthusiasm diligently and mercilessly. It tries to convert them into
mere technicians, clumsy machines.

We cannot examine all the techniques that Mencken uses in his satirical writings, but we can
note here the subtle way in which he influences our reactions simply by his choice of words. A
good deal of the effect of this passage is produced by Mencken's "namecalling." The "names"
that Mencken used here are heavily freighted with emotional overtones; IDIOTS, FANATICS,

SCHOOLMARMS (one of Mencken's favorite derogatory epithets), CRANKS, ZEALOTS,
LUNATIC WORSHIPPERS. All of these words carry the discrediting connotation of extreme,
irrational commitment to a cause; the taint of "enthusiasm" that many critics ascribed to the
evangelical sects in the eighteenth and nineteenth century England. Where Mencken fails to find
an emotional epithet to suit his purpose, he invents one; GRAMMATOMANIACS. Most readers
do not know what GASTRO-ENTERITIS means; but they do not have to know; the word just
sounds awful.

Notice how Mencken, in the second sentence of this passage, indicates that he is talking about
both men and women teachers; "in pantaloons and in skirts." PANTALOONS was an especially
clever choice. PANTS would have been the word that most of us would have chosen as the
counterpart of SKIRTS. But Mencken detected an extra connotative value of the word
PANTALOONS, suggesting to a modern audience something archaic, slightly feminine. Note
too how Mencken uses a simile in the third sentence to deprecate the object of his satire,
comparing devotees of correct spelling to the lowly, back-alley TOM-CAT. One of the deadliest
words in the English language is the word MERE.

Mencken uses this word with devastating effectiveness at the end of this passage, where he
begins to shift his ground attack, warning us that these "enthusiastic" pedagogues are now in
danger of being turned into dispassionate machines as a result of their exposure to "teachers'
college" bunkum. What is more chilling than to be called a "mere technician"? (Sherbert)

The relationship between diction and tone.
Diction is a tool an author uses to communicate his/her feelings about a subject. Pat Sherbert
defines tone as follows:

In a literary work, tone is the attitude the author projects. That attitude is revealed
through his choice of details, through his diction, and through his emphasis and
comments.

Although tone and attitude are frequently used in textbooks interchangeably (defined: tone is
attitude), they can differ….Tone only reflects attitude. The writer, through his choice of devices
such as diction and syntax (style), implies a tone; as a result, the reader infers an attitude.

Tone is a musical metaphor for the writers' relationships with readers that result from writers
making two decisions: (1) how they will express their feelings about the subject, and (2) how
they will place themselves socially, intellectually, or morally with regard to their implied readers
- as their superiors, looking down; as their inferiors, looking up; or as their equals, addressing
them eye-to-eye.

Tone as the expression of feeling should not be confused with the description of feeling. Tone
expresses or implies the writer's emotional state, the feeling about the subject that the writer
desires to share; it will often differ markedly from the feelings expressed by characters who
appear in the writing. A writer, for example, can describe the cheerfulness of the airline flight
attendants in a sarcastic tone, the self-dramatizing gloom of a spoiled child in a scoffing tone, or
the pompous pontifications of a political candidate in a tone of good-natured joshing.

Clearly, writers need not say what they are feeling; tone emerges as a quality of the whole
utterance, whether spoken or written. An indignant speaker might say with deep sarcasm, "I'm
delighted that you show such contempt for my efforts. Nothing pleases me more than to find
honesty where I might least expect it." The speaker does not need to say, "I'm indignant." When
Wordsworth says, "But yet I know, where'er I go,/ That there hath passed away a glory from the
earth," his sense of loss can be heard without his having to say, "I'm sad." It is reported that Mark
Twain would never smile as he delivered popular speeches that kept his audiences in stitches.

Tone, then, is the quality of voice that conveys feelings, whether they are stated directly or
indirectly. With variations of tone, we can express love or hate, happiness or grief, comradeship
or contempt, compassion or loathing, humor or seriousness, anger, indignation, outrage, or
forgiveness. And these tones are only a beginning. Writers usually present not only tone, but also
a mixture of tones: anger and pity, sorrow and hope, and so on….

An analysis of tone will depend on a precise and accurate understanding of the author's attitude
toward

(1) the subject
(2) the audience
(3) himself

In order to investigate tone and attitude, we use the acronym DIDS:
¾ Diction: The purposeful selection of words for their denotative or connotative value.
¾ Images: The words and phrases that appeal to one or more of the five senses.
¾ Details: Concrete words used to call up an image, sometimes called concrete imagery and
not to be confused with a sensory image; a referent.
¾ Syntax: The author's arrangement of sounds, phrases, and clauses that becomes a
rhetorical effect.

Tim Averill says, "tone is an end of rhetoric, whereas diction, imagery, selected details and
manipulated syntax are tangible means that can reveal an author's tone." Averill breaks
tone/attitude into the following categories, which he identifies as language we can use to
describe tone:

Positive:
lighthearted, hopeful, exuberant, enthusiastic, complimentary, confident, cheery, optimistic,
loving, passionate, amused, elated, sympathetic, compassionate, proud

Negative:
Anger; angry, disgusted, outraged, accusing, condemnatory, furious, wrathful, bitter,
inflammatory, irritated, indignant, threatening.

Humor/Irony/Sarcasm; scornful, disdainful, contemptuous, sarcastic, cynical, critical, facetious,
patronizing, satiric, condescending, sardonic, mock-heroic, bantering, irreverent, mock-serious,
taunting, insolent, pompous, ironic, flippant, grotesque

Sorrow/Fear/Worry; somber, elegiac, melancholic, sad, disturbed, mournful, solemn, serious,
apprehensive, concerned, hopeless, staid, resigned

Neutral:
formal, objective, incredulous, nostalgic, ceremonial, candid, shocked, reminiscent, restrained,
clinical, baffled, sentimental, detached, disbelieving, questioning, urgent, instructive, matter-of-
fact, admonitory, learned, factual, didactic, informative, authoritative

Averill's three simple categories can provide a starting point for analyzing tone in many works of
literature, but author's often use a combination of attitudes. You may need a more comprehensive
list of categories in order to adequately describe an author's attitude in a specific manner.
Sherbert's list is as follows:

Attitudes of logic
explanatory, didactic, admonitory, condemnatory, indignant, puzzled, curious, guileless,
thoughtless, innocent, frank, sincere, questioning, uncertain, doubting, incredulous, critical,
cynical, insinuating, persuading, coaxing, pleading, persuasive, argumentative, oracular

Attitudes of pleasure
peaceful, satisfied, contented, happy, cheerful, pleasant, bright, joyful, playful, jubilant, elated,
enraptured

Attitudes of pain
worried, uneasy, troubled, disappointed, regretful, vexed, annoyed, bored, disgusted, miserable,
cheerless, mournful, sorrowful, sad, dismal, melancholy, plaintive, fretful, querulous, irritable,
sore, sour, sulky, dismal, sullen, bitter, crushed, pathetic, tragic

Attitudes of passion
nervous, hysterical, impulsive, impetuous, reckless, desperate, frantic, wild, fierce, serious,
savage, enraged, angry, hungry, greedy, jealous, insane, wistful

Attitudes of friendliness
cordial, sociable, gracious, kindly, sympathetic, compassionate, forgiving, pitying, indulgent,
tolerant, comforting, soothing, tender, loving, caressing, solicitous, accommodating, approving,
helpful, obliging, courteous, polite, confiding, trusting

Attitudes of comedy
facetious, comic, ironic, satiric, amused, mocking, playful, humorous, uproarious

Attitudes of animation
lively, eager, excited, earnest, energetic, vigorous, hearty, ardent, passionate, rapturous, ecstatic,
feverish, exalted, breathless, hasty, brisk, crisp, hopeful

Attitudes of apathy
inert, sluggish, languid, dispassionate, dull, colorless, indifferent, stoical, resigned, defeated,
helpless, hopeless, dry, monotonous, vacant, feeble, dreaming, bored, blasé, sophisticated

Attitudes of self-importance
impressive, profound, proud, dignified, lofty, imperious, confident, egotistical, peremptory,
bombastic, sententious, arrogant, pompous, stiff, boastful, exultant, insolent, domineering,
flippant, saucy, positive, resolute, haughty, condescending, challenging, bold, defiant,
contemptuous

Attitudes of submission and timidity
meek, shy, humble, docile, ashamed, modest, timid, unpretentious, respectful, apologetic,
devout, reverent, servile, obsequious, groveling, contrite, obedient, willing, sycophantic,
fawning, ingratiating, deprecatory, alarmed, fearful, terrified, trembling, wondering, awed,
astounded, shocked, uncomprehending

VERBS TO USE IN AP WRITING (and possible tools & effects)

WRITER OR differentiates alters
NARRATOR maintains describes
evokes shows (weak) enhances
uses (weak) implies paints
utilizes (weak) connotes prone to
elicits explains produces
manipulates elucidates reveals
alludes to emphasizes ignites
twists enunciates asserts
ignites clarifies stirs
suggests repudiates inspires
hints at refutes explores
creates tackles dispels
depicts compares demonstrates
conveys shifts constrain
conjures changes masters
up evokes construe
juxtaposes invokes transcends
portrays delineates solidifies

TOOLS details setting
imagery figurative lang. plot details
syntax foreshadowing point of view
diction symbols diction
comic details irony
tone

READER EFFECTS impact contrasts
pathos shock mood
intensity anger images
empathy awareness imagery
laughter connections tones
images

Linking words and phrases

The following words and phrases will help you show how one idea relates to another. They help create flow.

Addition and Conclusion

and equally important in the same way

moreover much more interesting then, too

of even greater appeal next consequently

in fact just as surely thus

likewies at the outset again

as a result as I have said for

further more specifically inasmuch as

also undoubtedly so that

therefore indeed it is certain hence

too in truth for this reason

accordingly last[lastly] under these conditions

in other words over and above in addition to

furthermore to condlude another

besides finally in summary

in conclusion second[secondly] to summarize

on the whole at the same time

Contrast and Comparision

but rather or

however conversely nor

yet although neither

whereas though either

on the contrary as quite as evident

as if on the other hand equally important

much more interesting as though still

notwithstanding in spite of of even greater appeal

in contrast to otherwise likewise

nevertheless similarly in the manner

at the same time just as surely for all that

despite

Emphasis and Repetition

for for example in particular

for instance in other words in fact

in the same way that is to say certainly

indeed undoubtedly as I have said

more specifically of course to be sure

on the account thus therefore

naturally obviously emphatically

most important in truth

soon Time when
not long after immediatly whenever
at length instantly next
at last at this instant as
finaly suddenly once
some time now since
later without delay occasionally
afterwards in the first place henceforward
presentaly forthwith then
from this time on straitaway meanwhile
from time to time quickly thereupon
a few minutes later at this point in the meantime
before after sometimes
until formerly in a moment
at present yesterday shortly
all of a sudden later in the day whereupon
in the futur since then during
while