Thesis submitted in partial fulfillment of the ...

Awakening Through Story: Buddhist Chaplaincy and the Power of Narrative

Thesis submitted in partial fulfillment of the requirements for
The Upaya Buddhist Chaplaincy Training Program
Upaya Zen Center, Santa Fe, NM

Trace Tessier
March 2012 - March 2014

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 2

Table of Contents 3

Abstract 4

Acknowledgements 5

1 Introduction and Motivation 10
10
2 Study and Learning – Literature Review 14
2.1 Applications of Story in Chaplaincy and in the Healing Arts 23
2.2 The Essence of the Contemplative Approach 27
2.3 Compatibility with Buddhist Practice
2.4 Healing the Distress of Modernity 35

3 Inner Chaplaincy – Spiritual  Formation  and  the  Articulation  of  a  ‘Theology   40
of  Ministry’ 42
45
4 Outer Chaplaincy – A Pilot Project 49
4.1 Choosing a Narrative and Initial Insights
4.2 Deepening the Inquiry and Finding Closure 52
4.3 Reconnecting to and Conversing with the Sacred
53
5 Narrative Contemplation and Practical Chaplaincy – Identifying General 53
Principles 55
56
5.1 Unpacking the Format of the Workshop 59
5.1.1 Permission 60
5.1.2 Autonomy
5.1.3 Perspective 64
5.1.4 Validation
65
5.2 Future Directions – Narrative Contemplation and Elder Care
66
Appendix A (Workshop participants group photo)
67
Appendix B (Mollie’s  picture)
69
Appendix C (Kelly’s  excerpt  from  Same Kind of Different as Me)
70
Appendix D (Sandi’s  list  of  friendship  quotes)
71
Appendix E (Mollie’s  short  story)
72
Appendix F (Meg’s  quilt)
73
Appendix G (Kelly’s  poem)

Appendix H (Susan’s  painting  and  life-story  ‘rewrite’)

References

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 3

Abstract
The Buddha saw clearly the vital importance of cultivating the capacity to recognize, appreciate,
nurture, and be nourished by the deeply mysterious, often painful, and yet strangely complete
and harmonious nature of phenomenal existence; an invaluable endeavor both in the context of
individual spiritual practice, and in terms of our fundamental engagement with the world as
chaplains. Toward this end, I propose that contemplative study, active reinterpretation, and
creative expression of our ever-evolving understanding of the narrative strains that call to us on
an intuitive level gives rise to an intimate process that can be practiced in solitude or readily
shared with others, and which in either case excels at creating and strengthening a profound
sense of connectedness and wholeness. After highlighting and synthesizing relevant
observations from the current literature, the potential of this approach will be investigated in two
complementary and yet mutually supportive ways. First, I will argue that a direct and ongoing
dialogue with the foundational stories, myths, and legends of Buddhism (as well as that of other
philosophical and spiritual traditions), can be invaluable in clarifying, supporting, and enriching
both  one’s  personal  practice  and  one’s  service  in the world as a chaplain. Second, I will report
on the results of a seven-week   ‘pilot   project’, during which time I guided five volunteers
participating in a combination of tai chi exercises, mindfulness practices, and the contemplation
and eventual reinterpretation of personally meaningful stories or other narrative-provoking
experiences of their choosing; all culminating in individual creative expressions of their insights.
The format of this mini-workshop is then further unpacked in terms of four discernible stages;
each of which is found to have engendered a fundamental and advantageous shift  in  our  group’s  
relationship to the realm of story. Finally, I end by proposing several directions for potential
future research along these lines, focusing in particular on the field of elder care.

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 4

Acknowledgements
First and foremost, I would like to express my gratitude to everyone who helps to sustain
the nurturing and transformative container of Upaya Zen Center’s Chaplaincy Training Program.
Special thanks especially to Roshi Joan Halifax, the architect and heart of the program, the
inexhaustibly patient Program Director Maia Duerr, and Sensei Hozan Alan Senauke for his wise
and grounded presence and teachings. Many thanks also to the amazing residents and staff.
I am also indebted to the many faculty members and visiting teachers from whom I have
had the privilege of learning including: Irene Bakker, Stephen Batchelor, Joseph Bobrow, Brian
Byrnes, Ram Dass, Malka Drucker, Norman Fischer, Bernie Glassman, Merle Lefkoff, Laurie
Leitch, Noah Levine, Cheri Maples, David Martinez, Fleet Maull, Richard Murphy, Shinzan
Palma, Ray Olson, Peggy Patterson, Erika Rosenberg, Javier Sicilia and the Caravan for Peace
and Social Justice, Kazuaki Tanahashi, Robert Thomas, Sarah Vekasi, and Pierre Zimmerman.
I offer my gratitude to everyone in cohort 4 for your welcoming presence and guidance,
to my compatriots in cohort 5 for your generosity of spirit and companionship along the way,
and to cohort 6 for your contagious enthusiasm. Special thanks to my program mentor Donna
Kwilosz for her unwavering support, wisdom, and kindness, and to the other members of our
mentoring circle (Anya, Pamela, Ted, and Wade) for your insight and friendship. My deepest
appreciation also to the members of cohort 6 (David, Gillian, Judy, Karin, and William), whom I
have had the great fortune of serving as mentor, and who have taught me so much.
Finally, a very special thank you to my teacher Sensei Beate Stolte, who’s wisdom,
encouragement, relentlessly questioning mind, and genuine kindness are constant inspirations to
me; to the courageous women (Kelly, Meg, Mollie, Sandi, and Susan) who participated in the
narrative pilot project; to my parents, family, and friends; and especially to my wife Lori, my
best friend and the love of my life, for her enthusiastic support, friendship, and love. Thank you!

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 5

Awakening Through Story: Buddhist Chaplaincy and the Power of Narrative

1 Introduction and Motivation

“Stories…readily   incorporate   themselves   into   our   felt   experience;;   the   shifts   of   action  
echo and resonate our own encounters—in hearing or telling the story we vicariously live
it,  and  the  travails  of  its  characters  embed  themselves  into  our  own  flesh.”

– David Abram

Everyone knows the feeling of being gripped by a compelling story. From our first

bedtime story to campfire tales, epic poems, TV news magazine programs, the enviable obituary

we hope to leave behind, and everything in between, at one time or another each of us has been

captivated by a plotline, discovered that we were strongly identified with a particular character or

scene, or simply came to recognize how we continually tell ourselves and others the story that is

our life. Maybe it is a book, a film, a play, or a yarn told in a hushed voice by a conspiratorial

grandparent that strikes some inner chord. Or maybe a storyline somehow subtly insinuates

itself in the mind; inspired by a piece of music or art.

Regardless of the source or the medium, certain narrative forms possess formidable

power to command our interest. Though the specifics of exactly what speaks to each of us may

differ in terms of topic, genre, style, presentation, and a host of other factors, upon a little

reflection each of us can probably list several stories that we consider to be deeply and

personally meaningful – even if we cannot immediately put into words exactly why we feel this

way. Far from simply being an interesting albeit harmless idiosyncrasy, such strongly felt

identifications might hold the key to unlocking a deeper understanding of the unconscious

metaphors and narratives that shape and inform our attitudes and relationships; both toward

ourselves and toward others.

While we all have our own favorites, cherished in large part because of our unique

experiences and individual temperaments, there is no denying the existence of certain recurrent

themes that run through the myths, legends, fables, poetry, art, and song of humankind as a

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 6

whole. Not only does this observed commonality imply the possibility of creating healing and

nourishing relationships through the medium of story-telling and story-sharing as it has been

practiced since antiquity in the process of council (Zimmerman & Coyle, 1996, pp. 72 - 75). It

also suggests that, as we glean insights about ourselves by deeply contemplating the stories that

hold meaning for us, we are also learning profound lessons about our world and those with

whom we share it. In this vein, David Loy highlights the unique capacity of stories to inspire,

lend insight, remind us of those oh-so-important lessons that we already know but so easily

forget, and do grave damage when we mistake them for reality, in his suggestively titled book

The World is Made of Stories (2010).
Yet there is also the ever-present danger that the stories we tell ourselves and others

could easily become an escape mechanism; a means of avoiding the painful realities of our lives.

According to Zen teacher Norman Fischer, it was just this recognition that led the Buddha to

devise   the   doctrine   of   ‘no-self’, not as he puts it, because the self does not exist, but because

“every  story,  by  hooking  us  to  its  plotline and shaping us through its narrative structure, says far

too   much   that   is   not   true,   and   far   too   little   that  is”   (2008, p. 15). It is important to point out,

however, that this admonition forms just one small portion of an entire book dedicated to the

transformative and healing power of story; in this case, a reinterpretation   of  Homer’s   epic tale

The Odyssey as a roadmap of the spiritual journey.
In any event, we must acknowledge that the mistaking of our internal narratives for

reality is, for most of us, a deeply ingrained habit. Fortunately, the Buddha also proposes a

corrective to our automatic tendency to unquestioningly believe our thoughts: mindfulness. As

meditation teacher Sharon Salzberg so clearly puts it,

Mindfulness helps us get better   at   seeing   the   difference   between   what’s   happening   and  
the  stories  we  tell  ourselves  about  what’s  happening,  stories  that  get  in  the  way  of  direct  

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 7

experience. Often such stories treat a fleeting state of mind as if it were our entire and
permanent self (2010, p. 13).
In this thesis, I propose that consciously, mindfully, and purposively engaging with
narrative as a lens through which to better understand and appreciate our lives – and ultimately,
like meditation, as something that wields a capacity to point beyond itself – offers another way
of seeing through the veil that is cast over direct experience when we  ‘mis-take’  our thoughts,
concepts, and stories for reality. Elaborating upon this framework, I go on to consider how we as
Buddhist practitioners might learn to skillfully tap  into  the  timeless  current  of  humanity’s  great  
narrative flow without becoming caught in a whirlpool of self-cherishing or self-denigration,
being pulled out to sea by a riptide of worry or regret, or finding ourselves endlessly floundering
on the shores of daydream and fantasy. Likewise, from the perspective of chaplaincy, I inquire
into the ways that an increased appreciation for the role of story, grounded in meditative practice
and complemented by a cultivated ability to identify and actively work with the metaphors which
guide our lives, can inspire, inform, and enhance both our work as agents of change, and our
relationships with those we serve. Said another way, this paper is an inquiry into how the
intersection of various ancient and modern narrative forces can shape and inform the vision,
motivation, and modes of worldly engagement of   today’s   Buddhist   practitioner   and   chaplain,
while simultaneously yielding a simple technique that invites people of any (or no) faith to
embark on their own personal journeys of insight and discovery.
As a means of lending structure to this investigation, while at the same time rooting the
discussion firmly at the crossroads of time-honored wisdom and contemporary knowledge, a
substantial portion of this work will consist of an integrative literature review, presented in Sec.
2. Here I combine insights gleaned from recent research on the role of metaphor in shaping
human understanding and behavior with key findings in such diverse fields as: critical and

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 8

contemplative approaches to reinterpreting mythic and religious texts, the science of cognition

and the biological roots of knowledge, spirituality and its connection to the process of

maturation, and investigations into the relationship between concepts, language, and the natural

world – all of which will be seen to have surprising and informative correlates in the Dharma.

Whereas Sec. 2 is envisioned as the learning piece of this work, the following two

sections are meant to illustrate, respectively, possible inner and outer chaplaincy applications of

these ideas. Specifically, Sec. 3 considers the potential efficacy of contemplatively studying

those myths, legends, and stories that call to us – both as practitioners and as chaplains – in a

personal way. In addition to presenting some of my own thoughts arising from these

considerations, this portion of the text will illustrate how a cyclic process of interpretive

engagement with the foundational tales   that   shape   one’s   chosen   spiritual tradition can prove

invaluable in at least two ways. First, it can provide the inspiration, direction, and ongoing

support that lend vitality and freshness to one’s  personal  practice.  Second, it can aid the chaplain

in (and perhaps even guide the chaplain through) an individual process of self-assessment and

definition; culminating in what has been referred to in the literature as the articulation of a

“theology   of   ministry” (Fisher, 2013, loc. 339), and providing the impetus to deeply consider

what one most wants to bring to the world.

By its very nature, this is a personal inquiry – one that is perhaps best engaged in directly

and privately in order to receive full benefit. Yet, it is also conceivable that such an endeavor

proceeds just as well, and maybe even better, when shared and accomplished with others. For, as

Norman Fischer contends, to contemplate something deeply, especially in the context of a group

or community, is one of the greatest activities that we as human beings have ever devised (2012).

In either case, the required ability  to  ‘look  deeply’  when engaged in such study implies

the need for an underlying and supportive meditative practice in order to achieve best results.

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 9

Conversely, this same observation can also be taken as a strong recommendation in favor of

contemplative study and investigation as being an ideal complement to the type of pre-

conceptual awareness one seeks to directly experience in meditation. Finally, the serendipitous

concordance expounded in Sec. 2, unifying the seemingly diverse areas of knowledge alluded to

above, suggests the possibility of developing a structured program, suitable for use in both

individual and group settings, for relating to life-shaping stories and events in increasingly

reflective and mindful ways. Such an approach would, first and foremost, be supportive of an

open-ended encounter with   one’s chosen narrative; holding out the possibility of an ever-

widening and ever-deepening exploration. Yet, at the same time, it would include methods for

marking and valorizing those realizations and breakthroughs in understanding that inevitably

occur as the process unfolds. Ultimately, the resulting techniques might one day hold promise

both as personal growth practices and as chaplaincy-type interventions.

As a tentative first step in this direction, I report in Sec. 4 on the results of a seven-week

‘pilot  project’. Throughout this time I guided a group of five volunteers who participated in a

combination of tai chi exercises, mindfulness practices, and the contemplation and eventual

reinterpretation of personally meaningful stories/narrative-provoking experiences of their own

choosing. The capstone of this mini-workshop was a presentation to the group of each
individual’s creative/artistic expression of her1 personal insights, enhanced understandings, and

meaningful encounters with forgotten or long-ignored interior landscapes; all facilitated by the

power of narrative. In this brief period of time our group discovered that awareness brought to

ingrained and previously unconscious thought and action-shaping metaphorical processes can

encourage certain liberating shifts to occur – from reactivity to responsiveness, from a feeling

that   one’s   life   story   is   fragmented   and   incomplete   to   an   ever-evolving sense of coherence and

1 All five workshop participants are females that have studied tai chi with me.

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 10

purposefulness, and from a generalized sense of resignation to a newfound appreciation for the
vicissitudes of daily life – all by combining mindfulness practices with the willingness and
cultivated ability to see old stories in new ways. Finally, in section 5, I attempt to identify a set
of general principles arising out of the pilot project in support of chaplains who might wish to
utilize narrative contemplation and interpretation as a possible intervention in their own work,
and suggest several directions for future research along these lines.
2 Study and Learning – Literature Review

2.1 Applications of Story in Chaplaincy and in the Healing Arts
“May   you   be   happy,   and,   in   being   happy,   spread   happiness   to   others.     May   you   be   well,  
and, in being well, tend to those who are not well. May you be peaceful, and, in being
peaceful,  cultivate  a  more  just  and  loving  world.”

– Rev. Danny Fisher
From what has been said so far, it is apparent that our first goal must be to glean deeper
insight into what it might mean to formulate a coherent a vision of chaplaincy that is capable of
incorporating narrative in a personally meaningful, nourishing, and inspiring way, while at the
same time retaining a sense of broad inclusivity and openness. Although such an approach is by
no means novel, it is perhaps only in the last two decades that inquiries of this type have
garnered much attention. In fact, it was not until the  1960’s  that  the medical establishment as a
whole even began to recognize the phenomenon of reminiscence, often exhibited to a high
degree among the elderly, as a natural and healthy activity, rather than as a sign of senility
(Butler, 1963). Fortunately nowadays, in addition to broad-based seminal works on the key
societal roles played by myth and legend in traditional oral cultures, the comparative study of
which highlights humanity’s basic sameness and “compels   us   to   view   the   cultural   history   of  
mankind  as  a  unit” (Campbell, 1991, p. 3), one also readily encounters a multitude of focused
studies detailing the successful application of story and remembrance in disciplines such as the
healing arts and chaplaincy care. Some of the specific techniques investigated in these areas

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 11
include: the construction of ‘personal legacies’   (either   scrapbooks or audio recordings of
meaningful stories) which are found   “to   decrease   caregiving   stress   and   increase   family  
communication among individuals with chronic, life-limiting illnesses and their family
caregivers”   (Allen,   Hilgeman,   Ege,   Shuster,   &   Burgio, 2008, p. 1029), the development of
‘ethical   wills’  (written  statements  that  capture  “one’s  values,  wisdom,  hopes,  and  advice”)  that  
show promise as a method for reducing suffering at the end of life (Gessert, Baines, Kuross,
Clark, & Haller, 2004, p. 517),  and  various  methods  for  facilitating  the  telling  of  one’s  life  story  
that  often  lead  to  “catharsis,  integration,  meaning-making,  and  the  enhancement  of  relationships”  
among individuals confronting death (Brady, 1999, p. 176).

Another novel intervention that culminates in the creation of a tangible record  of  one’s  
life story is dignity therapy; a psychotherapeutic technique that invites terminally ill patients to
discuss those issues that are deemed most important, or that they wish to have recorded for
posterity. The result is a final transcript of the sessions that can be bequeathed to a loved one. In
keeping with the other studies mentioned above, the investigators involved in this particular
project likewise conclude   that   “Dignity   therapy   shows   promise as a novel therapeutic
intervention  for  suffering  and  distress  at  the  end  of  life”  (Chochinov  et  al.,  2005,  p.  5520).

It is noteworthy that the transcripts of the dignity therapy sessions are available for and
even encouraged to be edited by the patient, with the goal of arriving at a clear and cohesive final
version. The vital importance of such overall coherence in our personal narratives has been
studied in detail by James W. Pennebaker who notes that, in sessions consisting of writing
exercises performed with people who have experienced traumatic events, those who experience
the greatest benefits are those who do not simply write, but construct stories:

On the first day of writing, they would often tell about a traumatic episode that simply
described an experience, often out of sequence and disorganized. But day by day, as they

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 12
continued to write, the episode would take on shape as a coherent story with a clear
beginning, middle, and end. Ironically, participants who started the study with a clear,
coherent, and well-organized   story   rarely   evidenced   any   health   improvements…Just as
we are drawn to good stories in literature or the movies, we need to construct coherent
and meaningful stories for ourselves. Good narratives or stories, then, organize
seemingly infinite facets of overwhelming events. Once organized, the events are often
smaller and easier to deal with (Pennebaker, 1997, p. 103).

In other words, one of the most important uses of story is to help us to effectively deal with the
fragmentation that we find in our lives and our stories; a sense of fragmentation that is often
exacerbated by the contemporary, pluralistic society in which we find ourselves.

Yet this is not to say that the multitude of theories, beliefs, and opinions that interleave to
undergird our modern worldview is inherently problematic. In fact, it is one of the great
strengths of the Upaya chaplaincy program that a vast array of different strains of thought,
involving ideas arising out of most if not all of the disciplines herein considered, are continually
being woven together in ever-evolving ways; and always against a backdrop of sustained
meditative practice. Thus, it is no surprise that some important work along the lines I am
proposing has already been done within the context of this program. In particular, cohort three
graduate  Bruce  Cowgill’s  thesis,  Completing the Enso, presents an inspiring synthesis of insights
from  the  point  of  view  of,  as  he  puts  it,  “general systems theory, Zen Buddhism, shamanism, and
neuroscience”  to  examine  “the general domains of metaphor, archetype, embodiment, and voice
as  a  means  of  sketching  some  of  the  features  of  the  chaplain’s  character  and  education”  (2012,  p.  
2). In the course of this inquiry, he even manages to use the much-loved story Pinocchio and an
example   from   the   world   of   puppetry   to   skillfully   illustrate   metaphor’s   power   to   fundamentally  
transform  one’s  way  of  being  in  the  world  (Cowgill,  2012,  pp.  50  - 57).

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 13
There is no question that the present work exhibits a good deal of  overlap  with  Cowgill’s  

thesis concerning many of the areas of knowledge considered, and perhaps even among the
motivating questions and goals guiding the two projects. Yet, in the end, two very different
approaches are being taken right from the start; with each emphasizing certain insights while
downplaying others, identifying those connections deemed particularly relevant by the author in
question and, ultimately, arriving at conclusions that exhibit a fundamental interdependence
between the questions being asked and the perspective of the questioner.

All of this turns out to be a powerful illustration of one of the most important claims put
forward by George Lakoff and Mark Johnson in their groundbreaking study of metaphors and the
roles they play in structuring human thoughts, attitudes, and actions – an observation that
underpins a great deal of what follows. In short, they propose that metaphor is not simply a
feature of language but, being more basic, actually underlies language itself. As they put  it,  “Our
ordinary conceptual system, in terms of which we both think and act, is fundamentally
metaphorical  in  nature…[and] plays a central role in defining our everyday realities”  (Lakoff  &  
Johnson, 2003, Chapter 1). What this suggests is that metaphors not only determine, in large
part, how we understand what we understand, but that they also constrain the range of ideas and
concepts we are capable of understanding, as well as the insights about ourselves and our lives
that we might conceivably experience; all dependent on the current state of our underlying
metaphorical structure.

Further, because this pre-linguistic apparatus normally operates in the realm of the
subconscious, the powerful influence it exerts on our attitudes, worldviews, modes of perception,
and learning tends to go unnoticed. Only when such limiting factors are brought to light can they
be transformed or abandoned, as necessary. Given this context, I suggest that contemplative
engagement with story can help to uncover here-to-fore unrecognized and unquestioned

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 14
metaphorical assumptions; in other words, to learn something new and unexpected about
ourselves and our world by working with, and perhaps altering, the very structures that shape our
attitudes, understanding, and knowledge. It is to an investigation of those features of narrative
interpretation, criticism, and study which are conducive to such discoveries and transformations
that we now turn.

2.2 The Essence of the Contemplative Approach
“In short, it is by interpreting that we can hear again.”

– Paul Ricoeur
Perhaps the most well-known  etymology  of  the  word  ‘religion’  derives from a translation
due to the early Christian author Lucius Lactantius (and later popularized by St. Augustine) of
the Latin religare – “to  reconnect” ("Religion," n.d., para. 1). But how is this reconnection to be
accomplished, and to what might we endeavor to reconnect? These are important questions to
consider, both from the point of view of individual spiritual practice, and in terms of how
chaplains are perceived by the wider community as representatives of ‘faith-based’ traditions.
The   world’s   various   religious inheritances, Buddhism notwithstanding, all include their own
doctrines, mythologies, shared beliefs, and recommended techniques as proposed answers to
these fundamental questions. However, in the present context, an earlier interpretation of the
word   ‘religion’, first attributed to the Roman philosopher and statesman Cicero, offers an
intriguing alternative viewpoint. His proposed etymology, tracing back to the Latin relegere,
yields instead the translation “to  reread”  in  the  sense  of  “go  over  again”  or  “consider  carefully”
("Religion," n.d., para. 1).
Exemplifying the suppleness and incisiveness possible given such a shift in perspective,
Buddhist teacher and commentator Stephen Batchelor both extols, and then proceeds to
demonstrate the virtues of an approach informed by this lesser-known etymology in his
presentation of what he terms “a secular   approach   to   Buddhism” (Batchelor & Halifax, 2013).

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 15
By emphasizing the value to be found in a critical rereading of the earliest texts from the Pali
Canon, always with an eye toward questioning and reevaluating certain doctrinally held ideas in
the light of our modern worldview, he arrives at an unorthodox and yet profoundly relevant
interpretation of the ‘four  noble  truths’. Specifically, Batchelor contends that in formulating his
most foundational teachings, the  Buddha’s  original  intention  was  not, as it is often presented, to
outline a description of the world and its rules of operation in terms of four articles of faith, i.e.
the  ‘truth  claims’  that  (i)  life  is  suffering,  (ii)  craving  is  the  origin  of  suffering,  (iii)  the  cessation  
of suffering is Nirvana, and (iv) the eightfold path leads to the cessation of suffering.2 Rather, he
sees the concerns of the Buddha as having been much more pragmatic; in effect, reinterpreting
the four noble truths as set of four tasks to be practiced and accomplished as a way of living
wholeheartedly in the here-and-now. These tasks are, to: Embrace suffering; Let go of craving;
Stop long enough to experience and valorize the cessation of craving whenever it happens to
subside; and finally to Act (from this place where craving has subsided) in accord with the
eightfold path – a formulation captured in the mnemonic ELSA (Batchelor & Halifax, 2013).

Such an exploration, which undoubtedly amounts to nothing less than heresy in the eyes
of many adherents  of  the  Buddha’s  teachings, nevertheless highlights an ongoing movement that
is  crucial  for  today’s  Buddhist  chaplain  to  be  cognizant  of  – the tendency towards secularization.
Identified as one of the most fundamental differences between the time in which the Buddha
lived and our own era, it has been argued that “the scientific and social innovations that have
restructured our world are the result of a shift from supernatural explanations to an empirical
rationality   that   casts   doubt   on   all   religious   beliefs”   (Loy, 1997, p. 2). In this context “the  
contemporary world seems to have a decreasing need for increasingly dubious forms of

2 The four noble truths are offered here in a commonly encountered form that unfortunately does not do justice to
their depth and subtlety. For an in-depth analysis from a more traditional perspective, please see His Holiness the
XIV Dalai Lama’s  insightful  book  The Four Noble Truths (1997).

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 16
transcendence”, giving rise to “[a] dualism…between   the   natural   and   the   supernatural   [that]   is  
generally alien to pre-modern  societies” (Loy, 1997, p. 2).

Postponing for a moment a discussion of the  vital   importance  of  a  chaplain’s  ability  to  
remain open to any and all beliefs or opinions about the appropriate way to interpret the four
noble truths (or, for that matter, any religious doctrine), we find that the foregoing discussion
also exemplifies a fundamental and far-reaching  interdependence  between  one’s  worldview and
one’s  way  of  encountering some of the more mysterious elements of existence. It might seem
remarkable to someone raised in a scientifically and technologically informed society, where
rationality is so highly regarded, to learn that not so long ago (on the timescale of human
civilization), there simply did not exist any notion of, nor language around, the distinction
between what we now commonly refer to as ‘natural’ vs. ‘supernatural’ explanations of events.
The contrast between these ‘primitive’ and modern depictions thus provides evidence both of a
continual and ongoing shift in the direction of increasing fragmentation of worldview, and of the
phenomenal power wielded by the metaphorical context in which a particular culture is
immersed (and may not even realize it has imbibed) to shape what its members are capable of
perceiving, thinking, understanding, and imagining.

Accordingly, with our interest piqued by this first encounter between the mysterium and
our contemporary need for rational explanation, we reconsider the activities of contemplative
reading and study from a somewhat different perspective; by pondering the potential efficacy of
cultivating an attitude of ‘Beginner’s   Mind’ i.e., a stance characterized by vastness,
boundlessness, and self-sufficiency (Suzuki, 1993, p. 21 - 22). As Shunryu Suzuki Roshi puts it,
in encountering and contemplating experience

You should not lose your self-sufficient state of mind. This does not mean a closed mind,
but actually an empty mind and a ready mind. If your mind is empty, it is always ready

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 17
for   anything;;   it   is   open   to   everything.     In   the   beginner’s   mind   there   are   many  
possibilities;;  in  the  expert’s  there  are  few (1993, p. 21).

Making what appears to be a very similar point, albeit in a more focused context, Norman
Fischer counsels us to “not simply assume that we will be able to understand what we are
reading, at least not fully or in our usual way”  when engaged in the contemplative study of the
writings of Zen master Eihii Dögen (2012, pt. 1). Instead, we are encouraged from this point of
view to allow insights to emerge on their own, as natural outcomes of our deep involvement with
a particular narrative, rather than to constrain what we allow ourselves to think based solely on
what happens to fit with our current worldview or system of beliefs, or to rely too heavily on
rational analysis and logical reasoning. This is not to say that the rational mind has no role to
play in this type of study; only that the narratives most amenable to contemplative investigation
are often not trying to explain something as much as to help us directly experience their
teachings for ourselves. Fischer nicely captures Dögen’s  perspective on the appropriate way to
relate to this perceived tension between intuition, rationality, and direct experience when he
states that “The  truth  is  not  some  transcendent  epiphany.    It  is  right  here,  right  now.    It  is  bigger  
than the logical mind, but includes it. It does not transcend or lie beyond it”  (2012, pt. 5B). In
other words, if we abandon our language and throw away our capacity to think logically, we are
misunderstanding  the  Buddha’s  teaching  as  well  as  our  own  lives. Yet, at the same time, we also
need to be cognizant of and open to other ways of ‘knowing’.

As alluded to above, this ability to see beyond our own preconceptions is also vital to
chaplains since, ideally, “Chaplains help those they serve draw upon their own unique values,
views and beliefs as beneficial resources—whether those same values, views and beliefs are held
by  the  chaplain  or  not” (Fisher, 2013, loc. 92 - 99). Thus, if we can recognize and appreciate the
metaphors, stories, beliefs, and other ways of knowing that are already in place in any given

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 18
encounter as valuable, preexisting resources, we will have already gone quite a ways toward both
finding a common language, and coming to a better understanding of the situation. In this sense
the  cultivation  of  ‘Beginner’s  Mind’  supports  efforts  to  skillfully  engage  with  the narratives that
shape our own thinking and perception, as well as with those favored by the individuals and
institutions which we serve as chaplains.

This is not to suggest that the critical style of reflection often employed in secular
contexts is in any way incompatible with the openness of approach being recommended by
Suzuki Roshi and Norman Fischer; only that it perhaps results in a slightly different flavor of
interpretation. Compare, for example,   Stephen   Batchelor’s   explication   of   the seventh century
Indian scholar-monk Dharmakirti’s  philosophical views on reality, emptiness, and meditation:

To   be   real,   in   Dharmakirti’s   terms,   means   to   be   capable   of   producing   effects   in   the  
concrete world. Thus a seed, a jug, wind in the trees, a desire, a thought, the pain in
one’s   knees,   another   person:     these   are   what   are   real.     Emptiness   of   inherent   existence,  
by contrast, is just a conceptual and linguistic abstraction. It may serve as a strategic
idea, but   it   lacks   the   vital   reality   of   a   rosebud,   the   beating   of   one’s   heart,   or   a   crying  
child. The aim of meditation, for Dharmakirti, was not to gain mystical insight into
emptiness, but to arrive at an unfiltered experience of the fluctuating, contingent, and
suffering world (2010, loc. 563).
I for one would be hard-pressed to argue that, at least in this particular case, any of these
teachers is saying something fundamentally different from the others. And yet each presentation
has a distinctive feel, based as they are on personally unique combinations of life experiences
and embodied metaphorical structures which, at first glance, may appear antithetical or
incommensurable to one another. Taken together however, the preceding examples of diverse,
yet mutually supportive and complementary ways of encountering a text, doctrine, tale, or

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 19
moment of experience with fresh eyes yield a broad foundation upon which profoundly
transformative shifts in attitude and understanding become possible.

Importantly for our purposes, in the course of laying out a methodology that nicely
combines these hallmarks of a critical, open-minded, and self-sufficient approach to the
discipline of narrative interpretation, philosopher Paul Ricoeur extols the virtues of adopting a
very specific stance, deemed crucial to the success of a reflective and hermeneutical encounter
with myth, legend, and story, which he dubs a ‘second  naiveté’ (1986, p. 351). Moving beyond
our first naiveté, characterized by an unquestioning acceptance of religious text and lore as literal
truth, while simultaneously avoiding the looming pitfall of a simple-minded, mocking skepticism
that is incapable of shedding any further light, the  second  naiveté  aims  at  “an interpretation that
respects the original enigma of the symbols, that lets itself be taught by them, but that, beginning
from there, promotes the meaning, forms the meaning in the full responsibility of autonomous
thought”  (Ricoeur,  1986,  p.  349  - 350).

This recommended mode of engagement is to be envisioned as a cyclic process, one
which we can choose to begin at any point, and to proceed with indefinitely; an ongoing
encounter in which both story and interpreter continually coevolve as a result of their mutual
interaction. In   Ricoeur’s   own   words, this recurring pattern emerges because “We   must  
understand in order to believe, but we must believe in order to understand. The circle is not a
vicious circle, still less a moral one; it is a living and stimulating circle” (1986, p. 351). Hence,
like the cycle of the breath, our ongoing attempts to reinterpret and continually seek new
meanings in the stories that call out to us can have both a sustaining and a revivifying effect; on
the tale as well as on ourselves and our larger world. As Jungian psychologist Marie-Louise von
Franz   views   it   from   the   perspective   of   her   chosen   field,   “The   religious   dimension   in   analysis   is  

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 20
nothing  other  than  finding  new  meaning…that  sometimes  brings  already  existing  religious  ideas  
back to life, and sometimes transforms them”  (Von  Franz,  1993,  p.  183).

The harmonizing influences of such cyclical modes of engagement are also well known
among various indigenous and oral cultures. For example Navajos, who through particular rites
wish to reawaken the hozho of their surroundings, must first establish this same sense of natural
alignment and peacefulness within themselves. Then only does it become possible that,

After a person has projected hozho into the air through ritual form, he then, at the
conclusion of the ritual, breathes that hozho back into himself and makes himself a part
of the order, harmony, and beauty he has projected into the world through the ritual
mediums of speech and song (Witherspoon, 1977, p. 61).
Perhaps surprisingly, this same basic process of cyclical interaction can also be recognized as
occurring  in  the  minds  of  many  of  today’s  cognitive  scientists  as  they  attempt  to  discern  features  
of, and articulate theories concerning the nature of, the mind-body connection:
We reflect on a world that is not made, but found, and yet it is also our structure that
enables us to reflect upon this world. Thus in reflection we find ourselves in a circle: we
are in a world that seems to be there before reflection begins, but that world is not
separate from us (Varela, Thompson, & Rosch, 1991, loc. 141).
And so it is that we never enter the circle naked, like a blank slate awaiting the wisdom of a
particular narrative to simply be writ upon us. Even the commonly held assumption that there is
something called   ‘information’,   residing   ‘out   there’ and waiting to be learned or discovered,
must be looked at anew. For, “When we include in our reflection on a question the asker of the
question   and   the   process   of   asking   itself…then   the   question   receives   a   new   life   and   meaning”
(Varela et al., 1991, loc. 478). All of our questing and questioning, all of our attempts at deeper
knowledge, all of the conclusions we are capable of drawing at a particular time, are shaped and

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 21
conditioned by our current level of understanding; in turn dependent on our prior experience and
learning, even on our biological and cultural evolution, ad infinitum. It is in this vast sense that
we appreciate Ricoeur’s  “We  must  understand  in  order  to  believe.”    

But then, given this relationship between understanding and belief, how are we to
cultivate the faith necessary to complete each full revolution around the hermeneutic circle?
According to Ricoeur, the interpretive process  he  has  in  mind  requires  “a kinship of thought with
what the life [of the interpreter]   aims   at”   (1986,   p.   352). Thus, it appears that intimate
connection with our aspirations, motivations, most pressing questions, and greatest doubts – to
paraphrase Ricoeur, those things toward which we might most fruitfully orient our lives – when
nourished and sustained by continual efforts to understand and appreciate ever more profoundly
that which is most intuitively meaningful to us, can be more than enough to nurture faith and
allow it to deepen our understanding.

Of course, this is easier said than done. The Buddha himself acknowledged the
challenges inherent in the kind of deeply reflective life he recommends by vividly describing the
practice of the Dharma as going ‘against   the   stream’   (Levine, 2012). For example, the four
noble truths alluded to above, whether upheld as dogma or interpreted as four tasks forming the
practical basis of a program for human flourishing, ask us to live in a way that is in some sense
diametrically opposed to the direction that cultures, civilizations, and societies, as well as our
own minds that have been strongly conditioned by these forces, tend to move.

One current that is particularly strong in our own day and age, which I suggest both arises
from and actively supports the perverted exploitation of an ever-increasing sense of alienation
among both individuals and larger societal structures, and which is in turn made possible by the
aforementioned fragmentation of worldview, is that powered by the story of  ‘progress’:

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 22
With the rise of the modern world, a distinctly modern faith—faith in progress—arose to
make sense of, and give ultimate meaning to the new notions and institutions that were
now dominant. Our deep reverence for science and technology was inextricably linked
up with this faith in progress. The universal enforcement of the nation-state was carried
out under the banner of progress. And increasing conformity with the rule of economics,
and intensified beliefs in its laws, are still shadows of this enlightened faith (Sbert, 2010,
p. 212).

In this light we can interpret the following quote by Norman Fischer as a telling commentary –
both pointing out the tremendous cost to our sense of meaning and purpose, and suggesting a
potential way through – on what happens when we trade a faith rooted in our deepest aspirations
and most penetrating questions for one based on the prevailing metaphor of ‘more is  better’:

Present-day  society  doesn’t  offer  us  much  in  the  way  of  vision.    Instead  of  vision  we  have  
consumption, in place of the journey we have the mortgage. We are enjoined to go to
well-lit, merchandise-rich stores to shop for our true satisfaction, rather than to
rummage   around   for   it   in   the   obscure   corners   of   the   soul…To   sail   out   onto   the   sea   of  
stories, ride the inner waves of fear, courage, and endurance, so that we can come home
with some sense of joy and grandeur, we need a vision more meaningful than what the
mundane, present world has to offer (2008, p. 56).
And so, like   the   old   adage   ‘fight   fire   with   fire’, we once again find ourselves faced with the
possibility that the best way to remedy the effects of a narrative gone awry – in the present case,
the loss of vision that results from being swept up by consumerism and the concomitant impact
that this has on our aspirations for and actions in the world – is with another story; one that is
thoughtfully and contemplatively interpreted or crafted.

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 23

2.3 Compatibility with Buddhist Practice
“Wonder  of  wonders! All beings are perfect, whole, and complete, just as they are! But
because the minds of men and women are turned upside down through delusive thinking,
they  fail  to  perceive  this!”

– Siddhartha Gautama, on becoming awakened
Of particular relevance to Buddhist chaplains is the fact, reported throughout the
mindfulness/awareness tradition, that the “openness and sensitivity”   experienced   during  
meditation, which frees the practitioner (at least temporarily) from the constraints of
conditioning  “encompasses  not  only  one’s  own  immediate  sphere  of  perceptions;;  it  also  enables  
one to appreciate others and  to  develop  compassionate  insight  into  their  predicaments”  (Varela et
al., 1991, loc. 1494). The proposal being put forward here is that contemplative reinterpretation
of narrative, a technique which, as we have seen, is evidently well suited to the conscious
shaping   of   one’s   attitude   and   vision,   provides   yet another way of transforming intention and
freeing the practitioner from the shackles of past conditioning and ego-driven behavior. Not
only does this method offer an approach to study and learning that is a well-suited complement
to meditation practice; it also holds promise as a stand-alone intervention for those individuals
who, for one reason or another, find traditional meditation practice unappealing or
discomforting.
Of course, we might reasonably  ask  at  this  point,  “How  does  it  work?”    After  all,  if  it  is  
true that meditation, by teaching us how to loosen our grasp on conceptual thought so  that  “the  
mind’s  natural  characteristic  of  knowing  itself  and  reflecting  its  own  experience  can  shine  forth”
(Varela et al., 1991, loc. 419), then why should we expect our deliberate engagement with mental
constructs such as symbol, metaphor, and story to elicit anything but the opposite effect?
As it turns out, Varela, Thompson, and Rosch consider this question in a slightly
different, and yet closely related context; that of the role of reflection in the analysis of direct
experience. Their recommendation is a conscious shift, away from our typical mode of abstract

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 24
thought that often maintains little connection with our perceptual field. Instead, they propound
an embodied and perceptually grounded activity in which “reflection  is   not   just   on experience,
but reflection is a form of experience itself—and that reflective form of experience can be
performed with  mindfulness/awareness”  (Varela et al., 1991, loc. 427). Applying this approach
to our topic of narrative interpretation suggests that, to the extent that the (unavoidably abstract
and often linguistically-based) contemplative process is nonetheless capable of leading to a direct
experience of itself, the reflective/interpretive activity of the mind can be thought of simply as
another object of meditation; albeit one that is now potentially well-endowed with symbolism,
inspiration, and meaning.

In many ways, the method being recommended here is strongly reminiscent of that
employed in the practice of phenomenology,   which   “seeks   not   to   explain   the   world,   but   to  
describe as closely as possible the way the world makes itself evident to awareness, the way
things  first  arise  in  our  direct,  sensorial  experience”  (Abram,  1996,  p. 33). The main difference
in the present case being that, what we seek to know through direct experience is the very
activity of mind that engages with abstraction, symbolic thought, and story, as a way of
accessing and becoming familiar with the linguistic and pre-linguistic metaphorical structures
that encode so much of our conditioning.

This recognition of a possible connection between narrative contemplation, bare
attention, and meditative insight can also shed light on the common experience of  ‘getting  lost  in  
a  story’; an occurrence during which, I would suggest, what we temporarily lose track of is our
separate sense of self as we merge with our object of contemplation – be it novel, film, painting,
or play. Of special relevance in this context, as we attempt to draw parallels with the
foundational teachings of Buddhism, are those instances referred to in several different texts
from the Pali Canon, when disciples of the Buddha become enlightened simply by listening to

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 25
the Dharma. Commenting on this phenomenon, Buddhist teacher Gil Fronsdal cites a passage
from the Anguttara Nikaya that enumerates no less than five   ‘bases  of  liberation’; only one of
which, he notes, involves meditation in the traditional sense (2009). These five (listed in the
order in which they are presented in the sutra) are: (i) hearing and experiencing the meaning of
the Dharma, (ii) teaching the Dharma as it has been learnt and mastered, (iii) reciting the Dharma
as it has been learnt and mastered, (iv) pondering, examining, and mentally investigating the
Dharma, and (v) meditative concentration (Sati Center Website, 2009).

From what has been said so far, we might be tempted at this point to lay particular
emphasis on the fourth of these modes of engagement, sounding as it does very much like yet
another description of the contemplative/interpretive process being promoted herein. While
doing so would certainly be legitimate, it might also obscure the fact that every one of these
different   ‘methods’   requires a high degree of involvement and immersion on the part of the
practitioner. Thus, it is perhaps more important here to simply acknowledge that, to the extent
that our attention is capable of being captivated and focused by something; whether the Dharma,
a contemplative object such as the breath, or a narrative within which we become absorbed, any
of these may serve as a powerful vehicle for transformation.

Finally, as a way of bringing this portion of our study to conclusion, we consider a
helpful illustration of some of the implications that such transformations have for the
development of the ego-self. In attempting to clarify precisely this relationship, Varela,
Thompson, and Rosch make use of an evolutionary metaphor as a way of drawing attention to
the enormous reach of karma (volitional action). Specifically, they assert that the traces left on
the psyche by intentional volitional actions compose

one’s   experiential   ontogeny   (including   but not restricted to learning)…a   process   of  
becoming that is conditioned by past structures, while maintaining structural integrity

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 26
from moment to moment. On an even larger scale, karma also expresses phylogeny, for it
conditions experience through the accumulated and collective history of our species
(Varela et al., 1991, loc. 1472).
A similar sentiment is echoed by Lakoff and Johnson who, in considering the effects of

those values upheld and imparted by a particular culture, also recognize the importance of some
ongoing sense of cohesion among our metaphorical structures.    As  they  put  it,  these  values  “are  
not   independent   but   must   form   a   coherent   system   with   the   metaphorical   concepts   we   live   by”  
(Lakoff & Johnson, 2003, loc. 466). A contemplative approach to working with narrative
therefore not only holds out the possibility of freeing oneself from the tyranny of unexamined
and ingrained metaphors, including those instilled by the culture in which we live. It also
suggests that such a practice can become a way of actively taking part in the ‘evolution’  of our
ego-self, i.e. in the ongoing process of maturation.

This last is, in itself, no small matter, and forms a crucial observation for both the
practitioner and the chaplain alike, as Norman Fischer explains in his book Taking Our Places:
The Buddhist Path to Truly Growing Up.

Spiritual   practice…is   in   essence   the   practice   of   maturity.     The   spiritual   path   leads   us   to  
the places we are meant to occupy in this world. Robes, chanting, ceremony, meditation,
text study, and all the rest may be valuable in their own right, but their real purpose lies
in the service of the path toward maturity. In spiritual practice we use these traditional
techniques and practices as vehicles to warmly connect us so that we can help each other
to  find  the  true,  lasting,  and  ongoing  maturity  that  each  of  our  lives  requires…In  the  end,  
secure happiness comes only with the solid feeling we have when we know that we have
become the person we were meant to be in this lifetime—that we have matured and used
the life we have been given in the best way we could (2003, p. 4).

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 27

2.4 Healing the Distress of Modernity
“The   question   is,   how   can   we   unify   the   things   that   are   analyzed   by   our   consciousness,  
things that were never separate in the first place?”

– Dainin Katagiri Roshi
If the process of spiritual maturation is, at least in part, an ongoing shift in the direction
of an ever more inclusive recognition of and appreciation for the intrinsic wholeness of
existence, then why does a sense of fragmentation seem to permeate life so completely, and on
so many levels? We have, for example, already noted the ever-deepening entrenchment of the
mythos of progress in our increasingly secular world – a development both fueled and sustained
by our strangely deluding capacity to imagine ourselves as separate from and independent of our
surroundings. While certainly a powerful and contemporarily relevant example, implicated as it
is in the ongoing destruction of the environment and the ravenous consumption of   the   Earth’s  
limited natural resources, it is far from unique. Nor should it be taken as suggesting that such
fragmentation of view is a strictly new development (although I contend that it has emerged as a
particularly salient feature of the modern world), or even that it is limited in scope to cultural and
societal issues. Rather, such behavior seems indicative of a fundamental misapprehension of our
true situation; one that ultimately has roots in how we tend to relate to our concepts, metaphors,
and language.
This insight, arising as it does in a secular context, is nonetheless perfectly commensurate
with the Buddhist worldview. Indeed, some Buddhist teachers contend that consciousness is
none  other  than  “that  which  divides  what  is  otherwise  a  seamless  Whole” (Hagen, 2012, p. 158)
by forming   concepts   “that   divide   and   define   the   world   in   an   effort   to   make   things   clear”  
(Katagiri, 2000, p. 20). It thus appears that our situation as human beings, which requires that
we repeatedly make use of and live according to “acts  of  distinction”  (Maturana  &  Varela,  1987,  
p. 40), and in which we are permanently and unavoidably enmeshed, is inseparable from our

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 28
conscious awareness. Accordingly, the illusory appearance of fragmentation that consciousness
necessarily engenders (often yielding practical utilitarian and functional benefits, as well as a
sense of clarity and at least some degree of understanding) seemingly only becomes problematic
when we forget, or simply remain unconscious of, what it is that we are doing. It is therefore all
the more heartbreaking to have to acknowledge our dogged propensities; both to extend these
acts of distinction beyond the limits within which they are effective and useful, and to
continually mistake these imagined fissures in what is otherwise undifferentiated Wholeness as
denoting essentially existent phenomena or objects. As Roshi Steve Hagen sums up our
dilemma, “the physical and mental objects of consciousness, i.e., concepts—are merely
appearances resulting from the working of consciousness. Our most grave, albeit our most
common error, is to take these objects for Reality” (2012, p. 158).

Part of what makes this ubiquitous jumbling of concept and reality so compelling,
perhaps even coming to seem indispensable in our lives, is the false sense of security it offers.
Enabling us to put off indefinitely the ‘awe-ful’ recognition of an element of inescapable
uncertainty in human life, and simultaneously to turn a deaf ear to the fascinating call of that
which is ultimately unknowable, our tenacious habit of confusing idea with essence can,
paradoxically, result in a shaky sense of stability. Yet even this spurious feeling of
groundedness, precarious as it is, comes at a price; a loss of contact with and growing suspicion
of the sacredness of life:

In a culture such as ours, in which emphasis is placed on power and the profitable
management   of   nature,  the  “irrational,”  uncontrollable  aspect   of   the  sacred  is   equated  
with   evil…it   is   anathema   to   the   patriarchal   dream   of   steady,   chartable   “progress”
(Edelman, 1998, p. 75).

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 29
As we have already alluded to above (Sec. 2.2), throughout history, so-called ‘primitive’  

peoples have consistently recognized no meaningful distinctions between natural and
supernatural explanations of events. But with the rise of modern society, with its emphasis on
science, technology, and rationality – undeniably responsible for countless beneficial and awe-
inspiring breakthroughs in numerous areas of human knowledge – an unanticipated rift has also
been introduced into our thinking. The result being a fragmentation of perspective that has
fundamentally altered our relationships: to the numinous aspects of existence, to the natural
world, to one another, and to ourselves.

As historian of religion Mircea Eliade understands it,  “The  first  possible  definition  of  the  
sacred is that it is the opposite of the profane”  (1957/1987,  p.  10).    And  so,  contemplating the
Buddhist image of reality in which all is perfect, whole, and complete, we may ask how it is even
possible to profane what is essentially sacred or holy, given an understanding that  “To  be  holy  is  
to  be  whole,  to  be  one;;  holiness  is  unity,  integrity,  perfection”  (Douglas,  1970,  p.  68). For, if we
can understand how this odd situation comes to be, and the confusion which brings it about, we
can perhaps also mitigate our part in it.

Remarkably, in considering this question we come to appreciate a subtle interplay
between the wholeness that underlies all of the conceptual distinctions created by consciousness,
and the uncertainty and unknowability of the mysterium. Seemingly addressing this point
directly, clinical psychologist Paul Pruyser states,

As long as the Holy remains a mystery, it is a tremendum. The moment it loses its
mysterious features it ceases to be holy; it is then a concept or a rational insight. Power
is always of its essence, for the Holy is not a concept but a symbol, charged with energy
(1968, p. 336).

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 30
And so it seems that our desire to know, the basic human drive to understand ourselves and our
world, and to dispel the murky darkness of uncertainty, is itself implicated in the process of
desacralization; often taking the form of a conceptual carving up of reality that, ironically, we
then try in vain to piece back together.

Fortunately, this same recognition also suggests another, by now familiar, way of
engaging these symbols that are ‘charged with energy’. One that is conducive to healing our
pervasive sense of fragmentation (in the etymological sense of the word health having derived,
as   does   ‘holy’,   from   the   Old   English word ‘hale’   – meaning   ‘whole’); that of narrative
contemplation. Specifically, once again following Ricoeur, we find that interpretation   “is   the  
‘modern’ mode of belief in symbols, an expression of the distress of modernity, and a remedy for
that distress” (1986, p. 352). While the effectiveness of this remedy is, in turn, born of the fact
that  “hermeneutics,  an  acquisition  of  ‘modernity,’ is one  of  the  modes  by  which  that  ‘modernity’
transcends itself, insofar as it is forgetfulness of the sacred” (Ricoeur, 1986, p. 352).

In addition to the crucial recognition that much of the distress of modernity arises from
an increasing sense of alienation from aspects of life long held sacred, the above emphasis on
symbols (as distinguished from concepts arising in consciousness, which as we have seen
inevitably lead to a fragmented view of reality that is often problematic) is also telling.
Promisingly in this regard, while extoling their relational and unifying virtues, the French
historian and anthropologist Jean-Pierre Vernant simultaneously illustrates various ways in
which symbols touch upon, in a uniquely healing way, many of the main points we have herein
been considering when he writes

In contrast to the sign, ideally univocal, the symbol is polysemic; it can become charged
with   a   limitless   number   of   new   expressive   meanings…[S]ymbols   possess   a   fluidity   and  
freedom that enable them to shift from one form to another and to amalgamate the most

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 31
diverse domains within one dynamic structure. They can efface the boundaries that
normally separate the different   sectors   of   reality   and   convey…the interpenetration of
human   and   social   factors,   natural   forces,   and   supernatural   Powers…[T]he   symbol   is  
never at rest, never in a state of equilibrium. It possesses a constant impulse aiming
toward something beyond what it immediately expresses (Vernant, 1974/1990, p. 238).
In this context, the protean fluidity of the symbol can provide a viable expedient for

seeing through and eventually leaving behind the false sense of security which accompanies our
normally unconscious tendency to accept thoughts, theories, explanatory systems, personal
narratives – even perceptions colored by these metaphors and schemas – as factual and true,
rather than relating to them simply as tools that have proven themselves useful in limited
domains. Of course, nothing presented above is meant to suggest that we should in any way give
up trying to learn more about ourselves and our world; just that we honestly and truly let go of
the idea of ever coming to some endpoint or final understanding. For, as we have seen, the
hermeneutic circle requires just such ongoing attempts at furthering our knowledge in order to
function.

Yet, at the same time, this same circle also shows itself capable of fundamentally altering
how we perceive the very objects and relationships we are endeavoring to understand, since

All the different forms of language are a means by which we give substance to our
connection with one another. Through language and story, we weave ourselves into the
world.    It  isn’t  so  much  that  language  and  story  confirm  the  ground  of  reality,  but  rather  
that they constitute the ground itself (Halifax, 1993, p. 139).
In short, having been prompted by the recognition of the harmful effects of a fragmented
worldview to consider novel and productive ways of relating to and engaging with our most

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 32
urgent questions, we find ourselves once again led to postulate a deep connection between
narrative contemplation and the never-ending process of maturation:

There   are   answers   to   life’s   most   important   questions,   but   they   are   never   final;;   they  
change as we change. Maybe true maturity is finding a way of keeping such questions
alive throughout our lifetime. For when there are no more questions, we stop maturing
and merely begin to age (Fischer, 2003, p. 25).
Thus, instead of simply abandoning the noble human quest for understanding and meaning out of
fear of the fragmentation which results whenever we hold to our views and opinions too tightly,
what is being proposed is that we instead gradually learn to keep in mind as best we can what it
is that we are actually doing whenever we engage with the realm of concepts, as well as to
cultivate and refine our skills in this arena.
These, however, are no small tasks, and seem to require that we embark on a completely
different path toward ‘knowing’.     One   that,   recalling   Ricoeur’s   view   that   the   distress   of  
modernity ultimately arises from a  ‘forgetfulness of the sacred', has much in common with the
act   of   ‘remembering’.     Erich Neumann, in The Origins and History of Consciousness, hints at
what may be required of us in this regard when  he  writes  that  “original  wisdom  is  pre-worldly,
i.e., prior to the ego and the coming of consciousness…Man’s  task  in  the  world  is  to  remember  
with  his  conscious  mind  what  was  knowledge  before  the  advent  of  consciousness” (1954, pp. 23
- 24).    Yet  even  this  ‘original  wisdom’  would not have us completely turn our backs on our hard
won conceptual understanding since, in coming to such recognition it appears that, at least in the
realm of narrative contemplation, “[o]ur  first  task…is  to  let  our  imagination  enter  the  mythical  
world—to  “mythologize.”    Our  second  is  to  “demythologize”  and…make  the  earlier experience
a dimension of modern thought” (Edelman, 1998, p. 49).

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 33
This last statement serves as our clearest indication yet that the areas of human

knowledge to which we have been appealing – science, secularism, progress, linguistics, and so
on, as well as Buddhist thought when viewed from such modern perspectives – do not stand
outside the narrative schemas we wish to contemplatively investigate and learn from like
objective tools. Rather, these fields of study are, themselves, some of the metaphors that shape
our worldviews most profoundly. Accordingly, their influence on our thinking must be taken
into account in as conscious a way as possible if we are to alleviate the adverse effects caused by
our giving these stories more credence than they otherwise deserve, and continually falling into
the trap of mistaking ideas for truth, concepts for reality, and unnoticed or neglected subtleties
for certainty.

Importantly in this regard, once a metaphorical structure is recognized as such, one of the
most profound and remarkable insights in this entire field of study can be brought to bear. As
George Lakoff and Mark Johnson so eloquently describe the essence of their thesis,

It is as though the ability to comprehend experience through metaphor were a sense, like
seeing or touching or hearing, with metaphors providing the only ways to perceive and
experience much of the world. Metaphor is as much a part of our functioning as our
sense of touch, and as precious (2003, loc. 4367).
And so, in bringing this portion of the text to conclusion we note that, by recognizing
many of the most vaunted (and often least closely examined) pillars of modern society as nothing
more (or less) than metaphors with a remarkable capacity to shape our thoughts, perceptions,
modes of understanding – our very lives and world – in a fundamental way, we can now more
readily appreciate their impacts on our metaphorical sense fields and consciousness. For,
according to Roshi Joan Halifax,

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 34
The power of language, the force of words shape the landscapes of our minds. The
landscapes of our minds shape our environment. The world around us, culture and the
wilderness, make indelible impressions on our minds. A timeless conversation is going
on among all things, yet we seem to have selected out our next of kin as the only ones we
actually listen to (Halifax, 1993, p. 93).
Of course, at some point, in order to directly see and experience our lives and the lives of

all  beings  as  ‘perfect,  whole,  and  complete’,  we  may  find  it   necessary to employ narrative in a
way that ultimately goes beyond itself; enabling us to temporarily drop all of our stories,
including those concerning suffering and lack, even maturity and perfection. As Dainin Katagiri
Roshi expresses the necessity of, and the recommended approach to, this process

The highest level of human life is not to be found within our commonsense understanding
of things. Still, we cannot ignore or escape these views. So we have to understand our
commonsense ideas thoroughly, and then we must go beyond them (2000, p. 81).
The cultivated ability to see beyond and through our concepts and stories can then lead to the
development of what Katagiri refers to as a  “generous  mind”,  i.e., the capacity “to  receive with
no sense that things are either defiled   or   immaculate”   (2000,   p.   74).     Fortunately, even this
appears possible since, according to author and storyteller Rafe Martin, stories
are a technology, maybe the oldest and most powerful on the planet, real tools for inner
change that can help us see with our minds and hearts, awaken deep aspirations,
enhance our skills, revive the will to leave old and self-centered paths behind as we keep
on working to accomplish the way of the real, fully flowered human being (Reeves, 2010,
loc. 117).

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 35

3 Inner Chaplaincy – Spiritual Formation and the Articulation of a ‘Theology  of  Ministry’
“There is a longing that burns at the root of spiritual practice. This is the fire that fuels
your journey. The romantic suffering you pretend to have grown out of, that remains
coiled like a serpent beneath the veneer of maturity. You have studied the sacred texts.
You know that separation from your divine source is an illusion. You subscribe to the
philosophy that there is nowhere to go and nothing to attain, because you are already
there and you already possess it.

But what about this yearning?"
― Mirabai Starr

As Stephen Batchelor has described it,   “The   Buddha’s   quest begins with certain

questions”   such   as   “Why   are   we   born?”,   “Why   do   we   die?”,   and   “Why   are   we   here   at   all?”  

(Batchelor & Halifax, 2013). These questions are not particular to the Buddha. They were not

first posed by him. They are in some sense timeless, and the longing they express signals the

birth of the contemplative and reflective aspects of all human life. Investigating and grappling

with these questions is arguably the fundamental impetus of all religious speculation, and

perhaps as well an important driving force behind all philosophical and scientific inquiry.

Taking such considerations seriously must therefore inevitably lead us to confront the myths and

metaphors which inform our basic worldview, however subtle or unconscious their influences

may be. For, as Joseph Campbell so evocatively puts it,

myth is the secret opening through which the inexhaustible energies of the cosmos pour

into human cultural manifestation. Religions, philosophies, arts, the social forms of

primitive and historic man, prime discoveries in science and technology, the very dreams

that blister sleep, boil up from the basic, magic ring of myth (Campbell, 1949, p. 3).

That special place, where existential longing and the imaginative/creative energies which

are unleashed by and at the same time harnessed by mythic narrative, intersect, has long seemed

to me a fertile ground for fundamental growth and self-discovery. Accordingly, I resonate

strongly with the words of John  O’Donohue  when  he  writes

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 36
Longing is the deepest and most ancient voice in the human soul. It is the secret source
of all presence, and the driving force of all creativity and imagination: longing keeps the
door open and calls towards us the gifts and blessings which our lives dream (1999, pp.
72 - 73).
From the point of view of spiritual practice, it seems that such longing is always and most

poignantly   directed   toward   that   which   we   hold   ‘sacred’,   whatever   the   term   happens   to   mean   for
each of us. Meaning that can perhaps best be elucidated and clarified by turning to those myths
and legends that call to us in a personal way. For, as Jungian psychologist James Hillman
explains   it,   “The   basic   answers   to   why in a story are to be discovered in myths…the   selective  
logic operating in the plots of our lives is the logic of mythos, mythology” (1983, pp. 11 - 12).

We have already noted in our discussion of the hermeneutic circle in Sec. 2 that, for the
process of contemplative study to bear fruit it is all-important to somehow tap into that which we
already  ‘know’,  even  if  at  first  only  on  an  intuitive  level.    If we can do so, then according to Paul
Ricoeur, the interpretive process (and the fluidity of understanding which it helps to engender)
makes it possible for us   to   “communicate   with   the   sacred   by   making   explicit   the   prior  
understanding   that   gives   life   to   the   interpretation”   (1986,   p.   352). Unfortunately, as we have
seen, this type of communication is proving more and more difficult in our increasingly
materialistic and fragmentary world. One in which the ancient myths that once preserved and
poetically expressed the metanarratives informing the relational worldviews of individuals,
communities, and cultures have steadily given way to rational explanatory systems.

When  a  society’s  agreed  upon  rules  for  storytelling, imagining, and meaning-making are
wholly abandoned in favor of theoretical constructs characterized by an uncompromising stance
of objectivity, or subtly influenced by an unquestioned yet steadfast commitment to mechanistic
realism, the perspective which co-dependently arises leaves little room for the subjective side of

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 37
experience – for characters, plots, and the like. Seemingly commenting on exactly this aspect of
modern thought, Buddhist practitioner and religious scholar John Dunne contends that the
current popularity   of   the   ‘cyborg’   metanarrative   in   films   like   Robocop and The Terminator
expresses our deep-seated “fear that we are being slowly devoured by an impersonal rationalistic
explanation  of  our  cosmos”, and notes that the climaxes of these various tales always occur when
“the  cyborg  stops  operating  only through a rational explanatory system, and begins to incorporate
emotion [emphasis mine]” (Dunne, 2012).

The appearance  of  the  word  ‘only’  in  the  above  quotation  is  crucial.    The  takeaway  lesson  
is not that we should shun valuable ways of knowing our world such as rational analysis,
empiricism, or the scientific method. Only that we must also acknowledge that, as human
beings, we require more than just explanations. We also need stories that engender meaning,
connection, feeling, and purpose in order to experience life in a holistic and satisfying way. For
as James Hillman provocatively argues, in contemplating the   question   “What   does   the soul
want?” (1983), the answer which naturally arises is ‘It wants fictions that heal’.

Of course, what is being referred to here is not some naive or underhanded method
whereby we consciously delude ourselves by telling ourselves and others things that we know to
be untrue just to feel better. Rather, the approach is founded on a deep recognition and
acceptance of the fact that none of our concepts, theories, or explanations can ever be true in any
fixed, absolute, or literal sense. In other words, no matter how hard we try or how clever our
intellection, the conceptual maps we draw can never completely capture all of the nuances of the
territory.

Fortunately, it is here that the powerful symbolism of legend and myth can be most
instructive – both as an aid in loosening the bonds of our tightly held concepts and unexamined
ideas about how things ‘really are’, and as a much-needed invitation to imagine. For,

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 38
“[i]magination   is   the   source   of   story   and   is   fed   by   story.     Without   imagination, we cannot
penetrate   our   psyches,   nor   will   we   allow   ourselves   to   be   absorbed   by   the   world   around   us”  
(Halifax, 1993, p. 110). Alternatively, the skillful use of imagination can reopen the lines of
communication with the sacred: “This  return  to  the middle realm of fiction, of myth carries one
into conversational familiarity with the cosmos one inhabits. Healing thus means Return and
psychic consciousness means Conversation” (Hillman, 1983, p. 80).

Such ongoing imaginative discourses with the formative texts and tales of various
spiritual and philosophical traditions, while of inestimable value to the aspirant, are perhaps even
more important for the chaplain – whose explicit role it is to serve others. This is true if for no
other reason than that any such engagement will be sustainable over the long term only if
performed from a standpoint that resonates deeply with the serving individual. It is primarily
this need that I believe Rev. Danny Fisher is addressing when he writes, “[i]t is imperative that
chaplains of all kinds each go through an individual process of ‘self-assessment and definition’”
(2013, loc. 297). He then goes on to suggest that, as regards the development of the Buddhist
chaplaincy movement as a whole, the greater implications of this process naturally extend well
beyond the individual:

Doing this inner work, and then articulating a theology of ministry (whether publicly or
only for ourselves), are necessarily very personal undertakings. But the latter work in
particular, which   might   be   termed   “Buddhist   pastoral   and   practical   theology,”   can   be  
vital in terms of illuminating a path for future generations of Buddhist chaplains (Fisher,
2013, loc. 339).
Of particular relevance, both in terms   of   Upaya   Zen   Center’s innovative chaplaincy
program, and more generally in our pluralistic and increasingly secular modern world, is
Professor   of   Religion   Malcolm   David   Eckel’s   observation   that   “As   the   Buddhist   tradition   has  

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 39
changed and adapted to new situations and new needs, it sometimes has changed so radically that
it   is   hard   to   know   anymore   what   makes   it   ‘Buddhist’”   (Eckel,   2001,   p.   7).     It therefore seems
likely that a willingness to contemplatively investigate the narrative strains running through
different inflections of Buddhism may prove  indispensable  for  today’s  practitioner  and  chaplain  
alike; enabling each to more clearly articulate his or her own individual relationship with the
tradition at whatever level is deemed appropriate. Professor Eckel himself suggests the potential
efficacy  of  this  approach  when  he  asserts  that  “we  can  find  our  way  best  through  the  complexity  
of  Buddhism  if  we  see  it  as  a  series  of  stories”  (Eckel,  2001,  p.  7).

Such a process of self-assessment and definition via narrative contemplation also seems
to offer the chaplain an ideal opportunity – and arguably one comprising the perfect complement
to the development of a personal ‘theology  of  ministry’   – the impetus to consider deeply what
one most wants to bring to the world. A chance not to be taken lightly since, according to
Jungian analyst Helen M. Luke,

Each of us, as we journey through life, has the opportunity to find and to give his or her
unique gift. Whether this gift is quiet or small in the eyes of the world does not matter at
all—not at all; it is through the finding and the giving that we may come to know the joy
that lies at the center of both the dark times and the light (Parabola Magazine website,
n.d.).
And yet, as necessary as these inward glances and attempted refinements of
understanding and purpose are purported to be, I have also come to feel that such explications
should not be forced. Rather, they should be allowed to emerge naturally, as an integral part of
the exploration. In other words, if I have come to understand anything as a result of completing
this work, it is that adopting an open-ended mindset is essential to contemplative learning and
study.     And   this   is   perhaps   nowhere   truer   than   when   trying   to   make   sense   of   one’s   own  

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 40
spirituality  since  “[t]he  spiritual  life  is  not  about  beliefs in mysterious  or  miraculous  things.    It’s
about learning something immense and profound, something greater than any idea you can have”  
(Katagiri, 2000, p. 84). Thus, in the present context, one important function of narrative
contemplation is to let the myths and metaphors that speak to us come alive through the
imaginative interpretive process, and in turn, to breathe new life into the world:

The way we imagine our lives is the way we are going to go on living our lives. For the
manner in which we tell ourselves about what is going on is the genre through which
events become experiences. There are no bare events, plain facts, simple data—or rather
this too is an archetypal fantasy: the simplistics of brute (or dead) nature (Hillman,
1983, p. 23).
4 Outer Chaplaincy – A Pilot Project
Whereas the previous section is meant to show how contemplative engagement with the
myths and stories considered central to Buddhism can provide structure   and   context   for   one’s  
own inner chaplaincy work and ongoing spiritual development, as well as for articulating a
personal understanding about how practice and worldly service interrelate, the current section
focuses instead on possible outer chaplaincy applications. Specifically, it reports the results of a
seven-week pilot workshop, during which time I guided a group of five volunteers in an
experiential investigation of the potential healing effects of interpreting personally meaningful
narratives, and culminating in some form of creative expression of any insights arising from this
process. Each participant has graciously granted full permission for her story to be shared.
In order to find volunteers for this project, I simply offered a free workshop, described as
“an   investigation   of   the   healing   power   of   story”   to   anyone who was currently studying tai chi
with me. Five people, all women ranging in age from 47 to 79 (group photo in Appendix A),
signed up to meet at my home for seven consecutive weeks. The first hour of each meeting was

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 41
dedicated to our practicing and refining the Yang-style tai chi long form together as a way of
becoming more present and embodied. This was then followed by another hour to hour-and-a-
half which consisted mainly of meditation3, a council-style check-in and sharing opportunity
(Zimmerman & Coyle, 1996), and finally a more free form group discussion.

Having  been  deeply  inspired  by  Norman  Fischer’s  book  Taking Our Places, which tells
the story of him both mentoring and learning along with a group of four adolescent boys as they
embark on an inquiry into what it means to become mature adults, I tried as best I could to adopt
the same open-ended approach which he employs (2003). As a result, the form and process of
our time together was, to a large extent, allowed to take shape more or less organically. I saw
my job as facilitator to be mainly one of creating a safe space for whatever needed to arise in the
context of our group – trying to provide just the right amount of structure to allow each person
the freedom to focus on her own story, and at the same time to benefit from the stories of others.
In addition, I also frequently shared what I was learning at the time about the material forming
the content of the literature review in Sec. 2.

The basic format I proposed for the pilot project, and that we all decided to adopt, was a
four step process (unpacked more thoroughly in Sec. 5) in which everyone would: (i) begin by
touching in with their deeper intentions and motivations for coming to the workshop, and
identify a narrative which seemed relevant or inspiring in that context – even if, at first, only in
some vague, intuitive sense, (ii) immerse themselves in their chosen story in an inquiring and
contemplative way, (iii) attempt to interpret in their own words the import of the story for their
lives at this time, and finally (iv) try to capture, in some artistic or creative expression, the
essence of any insights or understanding arising out of the experience.

3 During our first meeting I gave the group some basic meditation instruction and sent each of them home with a CD
recording (my voice) of guided meditations. Each participant agreed to try as best they could to maintain a daily
meditation practice for the duration of the workshop. We began each of our subsequent meetings with an
approximately 20 minute long seated meditation (guided and/or silent).

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 42

4.1 Choosing a Narrative and Initial Insights
At the end of our first meeting I asked each participant to identify one narrative (or
something that worked to provoke a narrative in her) with which she would like to work over the
coming weeks. When we next reconvened, we were all impressed by the wide range of different
genres, media, and topics chosen by our small group. Sandi, for example, was immediately
drawn to a movie she had seen many times called The Man Who Would Be King (Warner Bros.,
1975); having   always   been   inspired   by   it   as   a   story   of,   as   she   put   it,   “loyalty,   trust, and
friendship”. However, upon subsequently learning that the film was based on a short story by
Rudyard Kipling (1994), and finding the book to be much different – “filled  with  greed, lust, and
betrayal” – she began to have second thoughts. But in the end, she decided to stick with her
choice and to “see where it might lead.”
Mollie, the eldest of the group, surprised herself by choosing an image of a bridge on a
birthday card from her son (Appendix B). Having  “never  been  a  big  fan  of  Japanese  art”,  she
nevertheless found herself drawn to its symbolism: commenting that   she   has   “been   trying   to  
move  from  one  shore  to  another  for  a  long  time”.    Sharing that she had been too afraid to ever
learn  to  swim,  she  further  observed  that  “since  I  can’t  make  it  to the other shore via the water,
maybe  the  bridge  is  my  path.”    Yet she also recognized that even this route is a challenge for her,
both physically – having had both hips replaced in the last few years, and mentally – having been
“teased  for  walking  funny as a child.”
Though you would never guess it simply by chatting with her, Mollie confided to us that
she had become “self-conscious and meek” as a result of being taunted about her gait. And so,
even though she once said to me after a tai chi class, “I’m  walking  and  I’m  vertical.    To  hell  with
what   other   people   think!”   in the container of our group she admitted to feeling that she has
“always  struggled  with  authenticity  and  excessive  worry  about  what  others  think.”

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 43
This sense of a struggle with authenticity rang true for our entire group, and became (like

friendships and relationships in general) an important theme for many. Meg, for example, chose
to revisit web-hosted television   footage   of   the   ‘Little   Rock   Nine’ – those first few individuals
bussed in during initial attempts to desegregate schools in Little Rock, Arkansas in 1957. While
reminiscing about watching these events unfold on TV as a young girl, and about how she had
been simultaneously dumbfounded, inspired, and shamed by their courage, she gradually began
to perceive a connection with her own subsequent struggles as a lesbian. It was also during one
of our meetings that she announced her recent engagement to her partner of more than thirty
years, and shared that what she really wanted was “to be able to enter the marriage with my
whole  person,  not  just  parts  of  me,  in  an  authentic  way.”4

Considerations of friendship and authenticity were also found to be significant for Kelly,
who chose to revisit a book that had been extremely important to her about ten years ago – a few
paragraphs having prompted her to move from the corporate to the non-profit world, and to a
much more satisfying and fulfilling life of service – but one that she had not picked up since.
She read the excerpt (Appendix C) from Same Kind of Different as Me (Hall, Moore, & Vincent,
2008, p. 106 – 107), which she had once found so meaningful and transformative in her
professional life and business relationships, aloud to our group. It speaks of false friendships, or
at least ones that are not highly valued, cherished, and worked at, in terms of the metaphor of
‘catch  and  release  fishing’.    She told us how, upon first reading those lines, she had come to the
decision that she would no longer spend her life in a work environment that encouraged the
fostering of fake friendliness for the sake of selfish gains and profit motives, and at the expense
of true relationship.

4 Meg and her partner were married on November 17th, 2013.

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 44
As the workshop continued she also began to speak about how, as a result of revisiting

the book in the context of our workshop, she had been struck by the realization that, not only had
she once made her living by catching and releasing others. She   too   had   been   “caught   and  
released all throughout her childhood.” Having had a mother who was unable to care for her, she
had bounced around between many different households; the realization giving her an even
deeper appreciation for the preciousness of human connectedness.

The final participant, Susan, initially had a difficult time settling on a single narrative
theme. She felt drawn to investigating the story behind what brought her to live in the
southwest, but recognized that many different valences of this topic were calling to her. These
included:    her  early  relationship  to  her  “cheapskate  father,  who  did  not  want to be tied down to
any   particular   job   or   means   of   support”,   the   pull   of   Native   American   spirituality   and   its  
relationship to the land, and the laid-back lifestyle of the place. In an attempt to help her narrow
her focus, I asked her if she could recall the very first time she felt drawn to a life in the
southwest. The next time our group met she told us how, after thinking about the question, she
“had   a   flood   of   memories   about   her   father.”     She   also   began   to   realize   that,   although   she   had  
been put off by, and had felt deprived as a result of, his thriftiness during her childhood, it had
also instilled in her a sense of safety and security that she has been endeavoring to reconnect
with for a long time. Further coming to understand that she has become quite a bit like him as
regards the manner in which she lives, it dawned on her just how much of his influence was
behind her being drawn to a simpler way of life. As she put it during one of our group meetings,
“I  spent the first half of my life trying to escape my childhood, and the second half trying to get
back  there”.

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 45

4.2 Deepening the Inquiry and Finding Closure
As the workshop continued and each participant became more thoroughly immersed in
her chosen narrative, further insights as well as more general aspirations and overarching senses
of meaning began to emerge. As we neared the end of our time together, everyone worked to
creatively express whatever they had come to understand as a result of their contemplations, and
presented the fruits of their labors at our last meeting. Additionally, in the spirit of the rites of
passage ceremonies of many cultures, and similar to the tradition of presenting one with a
Dharma name when the Buddhist precepts are conferred, in order to mark the occasion, valorize
people’s  insights,  and  provide  some sense of closure I decided to surprise everyone by offering
them each a name that expressed how I had come to see them during our time together.
Sandi,   to   whom   I   gave   the   name   “Benevolent ambition, intrepid resolve”, had become
enthralled by the subtle interplay (“both the good and the bad”) of loyal friendship and fervent
opportunism found in   Kipling’s   tale. She ended up compiling a long list of inspiring quotes
(Appendix D) as her mode of expression, which she later posted in her home to serve as a
reminder of the preciousness of friendships. She mentioned in particular how she was both
awestruck and deeply moved by how far one particular character in her chosen story was willing
to go in the name of friendship, inspiring her to commit to reconnecting with and working to
sustain long neglected relationships. She expressed her newfound aspirations to me in an email
after our workshop had ended: “When I was still working, I let my job and customers take
precedence over friendships and I lost two people who were really good friends – without a
chance to tell them a final goodbye and how much they meant to me. That was a hard lesson to
learn.    Now  I  reach  out  regularly…I  can’t  undo  what  happened  in  the  past,  but  hopefully I can
prevent  a  repeat.”

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 46
Mollie   (“Glides   across   bridge”)   gradually saw her field of view broaden as she spent

more and more time contemplating her picture; shifting her attention first from the bridge to the
water, then to the life within the water, the birds in the air, the people on the bridge, and even to
“those  unseen,  beyond  the  horizon.”    She  spoke  to   us  about   feeling  the  need  to   shift   her  focus  
“from   ‘me’   to   ‘all’.” She also confided that, though she   doesn’t   like “being   seen   as   old   and  
feeble”, like it or not, she knows she is on a bridge that is leading to the end of her life.

A musician and composer, she told us how these contemplations had inspired her to start
playing some of her old compositions that she never pursued. Having long labored under the
self-judgment  that  her  work  is  “not  good  enough”,  and  causing  her  to  be  afraid  of  putting  herself  
out there, she says she is now beginning to realize  that  they  are  “pretty  good.”    Perhaps Mollie
will decide to pursue these compositions, having  “always  dreamt  of  a  life  in  the  arts.”    Or  maybe  
she’ll   decide   to   move   on   to   other adventures. For, as she says in Journey to a Whole Heart
(Appendix E), a touching and very personal short story written as her artistic expression for the
workshop:    “She began to realize that in order to have a whole-hearted life, one must confront
one’s   fears,   know   that   many   others   are   sharing   in   one’s   experiences,   and   making   their   own  
journeys…for   once   the   missing   pieces   of   our   hearts   are   found   life   becomes   a   continued  
journey—of  growth,  to  our  connection  to  the  divine.”

In a similar fashion, Meg also began to see herself as having long been searching for
some direction on the next leg of her journey; feeling that, at seventy, she has already “learned,  
earned, and returned.” At the same time, she acknowledged a nagging sense of fragmentation
and incompleteness in her story as she spoke about how she had always had grand ambitions to
“do  something  big”,  and  yet  was  now  feeling  a  strong  urge  to  “step  away  from  society”  in order
to better tend to those aspects of life long neglected during her working days. As both a scientist
and lover of nature, she expressed regret at how she had taken a job at Los Alamos National

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 47
Labs   in   order   to   “change   it   from   the   inside”   but   instead ended   up   “selling   her   soul.”     As a
lifelong  advocate  for  civil  rights,  she  felt  shame  at  having  “chickened  out”  of  participating  in  the  
March on Washington.

Yet as she spoke it also became clear, first to the rest of us, and then by way of the
group’s  reflections, to Meg herself, that there was more to her story. That, through many one-
on-one encounters, she had indeed worked to try to change hearts and minds during her time at
Los Alamos. And that for several years she had braved hatred and intolerance by volunteering to
teach  black  children  in  1960’s  Georgia. In short, our group helped her to see that her low profile
but continued efforts  certainly  amounted  to  ‘something  big’.    

The name presented to Meg at the conclusion of our workshop, “Gentle   courage sews
harmony”, was inspired both by these reminiscences and by the stunning quilt which she stitched
for her creative expression piece (Appendix F). Heavy with meaning, the quilt brings together
the three important streams in her life that she is working to assimilate: the white and black cloth
representing her ongoing interest in and engagement with Civil Rights, the rainbow colors
symbolizing her life as a lesbian, and the green depicting her love of the natural world.
Committing herself at the end  of  the  workshop  to  “practicing  kindness  and  patience”,  her  resolve  
is woven into the very fabric of her artistic expression; embroidered on her quilt as the mantra
“Living  in  peace  with  myself,  friends,  and  weeds.”

Kelly continued to find more and deeper meaning   in   the   ‘catch   and   release’   fishing  
metaphor,   at   one   point   speaking   of   her   realization   that   we   must   “catch   the   whole   person”;;   not  
just  our  first   impressions  of  those  we’ve  just  met,  nor  the  well-worn  stories  we’ve  constructed  
about people with whom we’ve  long been acquainted. Talking of the need to drop the labels so
easily assigned to others, she seemed to have experienced a profound recognition of the danger

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 48
of,   in   her   words,   “solidifying   people   and   refusing   to   let   them   change,   thinking   I   have   them
figured  out.”    

Kelly’s   workshop   name   “Leads   with   heart”   was   taken   from   a   line   in a poem, The soul
that knows your name, which she wrote as her creative expression piece (Appendix G). The
poem   was   inspired   by   a   friend   of   her’s   – a woman with cognitive challenges who became a
Special Olympian competitor in Tae Kwon Do under   Kelly’s   tutelage   – one whose openness,
enthusiasm, and warmth of feeling she felt best exemplified the genuineness and authenticity she
had come to aspire to as a result of her narrative contemplations. About a month or so after the
workshop had ended, Kelly emailed our group to share some good news. Having found out that
Special Olympics Montana (with whom she had worked several years ago) was preparing a
banquet to honor their ‘Athlete of the Year’, she told   us   how   she   “took   courage   from   [her  
friend’s]  example  and  faith  from  our  group  and  submitted  the  poem  as  her  nomination.” Kelly
then joyfully informed us that her friend had been unanimously selected as the winner, and that
she would be making a surprise visit to the banquet to present the award personally. She ended
by writing “I  am  deeply  grateful  for  the  support  and  encouragement  from  our  group  that  gave  me  
the confidence to be vulnerable and authentic on behalf of a very special friend. Thank you
again  for  a  life  changing  experience.”

Finally,  Susan  (“Dwells  in  Gratitude”),  feeling  all  her  life  that  she  “had  nothing  growing  
up”, and  “living  with  resentment”  for  her  frugal  father,  came  to  realize  that  she  had  actually  “had  
everything as a child.”    Having been struck by a quote from A Reasonable Life (a book she was
inspired to revisit as a result of her contemplations) which  reads  “every  time  we give a child a
toy, we prevent  him  from  inventing  it” (Mate, 2000, p. 145), she was moved to express gratitude:
for growing up close to the land and surrounded by animals, for opportunities to invent and
create her own fun, and for the important life-lesson that happiness is a choice.

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 49
Having  been  inspired  to   ‘rewrite’  her   childhood,  Susan sent me a written distillation of

what she had discovered about herself and her life as a result of the workshop, and also
expressed these insights in a painting (both included in Appendix H) which she shared with the
entire group. The earth tones representing her until now unrecognized efforts   to   “bring  nature  
into   the   home”;;   the   symbols   at   the   bottom   denoting   respectively,   seeking,   peace,   and   rain;;   the  
crops symbolizing nature, the corn and pottery speaking her affinity for Native American
spirituality, and the simplicity of the painting mimicking her efforts to simplify. As she
expresses  this  part  of  her  journey  in  the  retelling  of  her  life’s  story  entitled  Desperately Seeking
Susan

I gravitated toward Native American art and customs because I felt a spiritual
connection   to   their   nature   worshiping   ways   and   needed   to   find   that   “spirit"   world   of  
earth, trees, sky, water, and animals that I had lost touch with. I needed to reconnect with
the solidity of the earth, absorb the life giving energy from the Sun and trees, feel the
cleansing   strength   of   flowing   river   water,   and   speak   to   the   animals   and   nature’s   spirits  
as they guided me towards a renewed life (Appendix H).
4.3 Reconnecting to and Conversing with the Sacred
For my part, much of the guidance I gave during our workshop discussions was informed
by Paul   Ricoeur’s notion that engaging with the hermeneutic circle of narrative contemplation
can help us to reconnect to and communicate with the sacred. So as not to unduly influence
anyone’s   process,   I   tried my best not to impose my own ideas about what the   word   ‘sacred’  
might be referring to, hoping instead that any such insight would arise individually for each
participant in a personally meaningful way. That this approach may have been at least partly
successful was suggested to me by my spiritual friend and mentor Sensei Beate Stolte in a

AWAKENING THROUGH STORY: BUDDHIST CHAPLAINCY AND NARRATIVE 50
private conversation during which I described to her the main results of the recently completed
pilot project.

At one point during our discussion, she enthusiastically brought to my attention some
recent work by Bronnie Ware, a palliative care nurse who has collected and recorded the
epiphanies of patients on their deathbeds in the book The Top Five Regrets of the Dying. Simply
stated, the common themes emerging from her observations are (Ware, 2012):

1.    I  wish  I’d  had  the  courage  to  live  a  life  true  to  myself,  not  the  life  others  expected  of  me.
2.    I  wish  I  hadn’t  worked  so  hard.
3.    I  wish  I’d  had  the  courage  to  express  my  feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
Sensei  Beate’s  input  helped  me  to  see  just  how  remarkable  it  is that most if not all of the
themes Ware identifies as being of utmost importance to those facing the end of their lives
played significant roles in our group’s   discussions and contemplations. In sharing these post-
workshop observations (as   well   as   Ware’s   list)   with   the   group,   I   found   that   each   participant’s  
response echoed this sentiment. Their reactions were perhaps best summed up by Mollie, who
wrote back to me “This  is  truly  amazing!    I  think  that  in  the  work  we  did  this  summer  some  of  
these regrets will be alleviated. We all seemed to be searching for a more authentic life and the
ability  to  express  feelings  honestly.”  
In many respects it is surprising how difficult it can be for us to show ourselves, and
those aspects of our lives which we find most important, motivating, inspiring, and precious, to
others. After all, one might expect such topics to be foremost in our hearts and minds, and
always on the tips of our tongues; ready to burst forth at the slightest invitation. Yet the
reticence alluded to by Mollie seems indicative of a struggle with authenticity that is familiar to