FTHOERRE’S EAVHEEINRZ YKEOTCNHUEP.
Jeannette Kaplun of Hispana Global is a busy mom advertisement
of two, award-winning author, TV host, and blogger.
6 Tips To ReJuvenaTe
Seasonal YouR BeauTY Regimen
skincare Find the best cleanser for your skin.
If your complexion feels dry and tight,
Looking and feeling our best is a year-round pursuit. make sure you switch to a more
But sometimes the shift in seasons calls for subtle hydrating formula. Balms, oils, and
tweaks to our everyday beauty routines. With crisper creams remove makeup without
weather around the corner, we asked Jeannette Kaplun stripping your skin.
to share some of her favorite fall skincare tips.
Use moisturizers with quality ingredients.
POND’S® Rejuveness Anti-Wrinkle Cream
is formulated with Alpha Hydroxy Acids
(AHAs), vitamin E, and collagen to
improve the healthy appearance of
skin and smooth fine lines in two weeks.
Bonus? It’s super wallet-friendly.
Don’t skimp on sunscreen. Even if
the temps are cooler, your skin is still
vulnerable to the sun’s harmful rays,
so continue applying SPF each morning.
This prevents fine lines and dark spots.
Pamper yourself with face masks.
Give your skin extra hydration with a
face mask 1–2 times a week. This beauty
treatment also doubles as self-care,
which we all need.
Hydrate your hands. Apply a good hand
cream every night and nourish your
cuticles with daily oil treatments. In a
pinch, you can use extra virgin olive oil
to keep hands and nails in top condition.
Adjust your makeup, too. You might
need lighter shades for your foundation,
concealer, and blush. Plus, some formulas
might feel too dry for the colder months,
so consider switching to creamier
versions of your fave products.
POND’S® Rejuveness Anti-Wrinkle
Cream keeps your skin hydrated
and reduces the appearance of fine
lines and wrinkles in just 2 weeks.
It’s formulated with Alpha Hydroxy
Acids (AHAs) to gently remove
dull surface skin cells, along with
collagen to support skin firmness
and elasticity. Visit ponds.com
to learn more
about this
dermatologist
tested, hypo-
allergenic, and
noncomedogenic
daily moisturizer.
RAISING THE FUTURE CONTENTS
IN EVERY ISSUE
6 Editor’s Note
9 Playbook
176 Giggles
150 22 139
SPECIAL: 62 134 162
Focaccia Made Fun “No Mama! Just Dad!” Foster a Pet, Nurture
KINDNESS An Insta-worthy version Not the favorite parent? Your Kids
IN 2020 you can bake with littles Don’t fret—it’s not the Even a short-term rescue
judgment you think it is. has long-lasting benefits.
16 67
Raise compassionate kids The Book Nook LIFE 166
today: from talking about Classic fables get an Go Ahead, Get Another
privilege to boosting equal-rights refresh, and 139 Useful products that are
resilience and performing other great bedtime reads A Laid-Back Thanksgiving worth buying in twos
family-wide good deeds. Five stress-free dishes
Plus, profiles of heroes YOU your kids will enjoy AGES + STAGES
who helped us all this year. helping you prepare
123 169
KIDS Relax, It’s “Me Time” 150 Pregnancy
A mom puts self-care Homemade With Love Start good sleep habits.
41 products to the test. Heartfelt and thoughtful
Screen Time You Can crafts for the unsung 169
Get Behind 128 heroes in your life 0–12 Months
We found 23 kids’ learning Beauty While Momming Help your baby get
apps that really shine. Manicure hacks with a 156 moving.
low-maintenance twist A Money Plan for the
48 Holidays 170
News + Ideas 130 Make your pockets happy 1–2 Years
Is it COVID-19 or the flu? Rebalance the Load by budgeting now and Leave the crib behind.
Also, the truth about A more even split of home reaping the benefits later.
artificial sweeteners. duties with your partner 170
3–4 Years
52 ON THE COVER Nix biting and hitting.
What’s Your Child’s
Stomachache Trying Veronica and Luis Licea with their children, 172
to Tell You? Bela, 15 years, Luis II, 15 years, and Mia, 5–6 Years
Doctors decode persistent 4 years. Photograph by Mark Williams + Teach about gender bias.
tummy troubles. Sara Hirakawa. Wardrobe styling by Lisa Moir.
Hair and makeup by Tricia Turner. On Bela: 174
60 Shirt, Madewell. Jacket, Urban Outfitters. 7–9 Years
Animal House! Skirt, Levis. Shoes, Doc Martens. On Luis II: Help kids relate to their
Meet Christian and his Denim shirt, T-shirt, and pants, Zara. Socks, teacher.
Portuguese water dog, Urban Outfitters. Shoes, Converse. On Mia:
Oso Oliver. Romper and shirt, Zara. Shoes, Cat & Jack 174
Target. On Veronica: Scrubs, her own. 10–12 Years
Shoes, Target. On Luis: Uniform, his own. Avoid screen-time
battles.
3P A R E N T S N O V E M B E R 2 0 2 0
What’s the “When a family
kindest thing member passed away
your kid has ever
done for you? unexpectedly,
my kids supported me
with hugs and
affection. Made a
big difference.”
“My firstborn JULIA EDELSTEIN MARK JOSEPHSON
ad-libs songs praising Editor-in-Chief Senior Vice President, Group Publisher
me. I asked Executive Creative Director AGNETHE GLATVED Sales Manager, Meredith Parents Network DONNA LINDSKOG
her to, but it’s still Executive Editor MIRANDA VAN GELDER
Managing Editor PATRICK MOFFITT ADVERTISING SALES
sweet!” Deputy Editor DIANE DEBROVNER
West Coast Director JULIE BANFIELD
Food and Lifestyle Director YOLANDA WIKIEL Advertising Sales Staff ALYSSA CRAMER COHEN,
Beauty Director KATE SANDOVAL BOX CATHERINE DAUN, ANNE GILHOOL,
MOLLY THOMPSON, MARIA TOCCO TORRES,
Senior Editor, Features KATIE ARNOLD-RATLIFF NADINE WAXENBERG
Senior Editor, Books and Travel KAREN CICERO Assistants BRIDGET CORRY, BRITTON FORKER
Sales Director, Direct Media TYLER HUB
Entertainment Editor JESSICA HARTSHORN National Travel Director MELISSA LUEBBE
Staff Health Editor EMILY ELVERU Senior Research Manager ALISON JAYE
Associate Editor, Beauty SHANNON M. BAUER
Editorial Assistant KYLEIGH LEDDY
ART & PRODUCTION MARKETING
“After I had Art Director EMILY FURLANI Group Marketing Director KRISTEN STUCCHIO-SUAREZ “My four kids
a miscarriage, my Associate Art Director JAMIE LEE Senior Marketing Manager JUDY SCHIFFMAN threw us a
5-year-old daughter Senior Designer MARIA FERNANDEZ-DAVILA Marketing Manager MARNIE DOWLER
drew a beautiful Marketing Coordinator DIANA ZULUAGA fantastic surprise
picture that said, ‘Dear Art Assistant AVA BRAMSON Group Creative Director JEANETTE CHOW anniversary
Mom, I hope your Production Director VINCENT M. SPINA Art Director TRACY D’AGOSTINO
uterus feels better.’ ” Associate Art Director DAVID L. TRACY party with family and
PHOTO close friends.”
ADMINISTRATION
Photo Director MARY CLARE CAHILL
Photo Editor JOANNA MUENZ Executive Business Director JANICE CROAT
Business Manager MEGAN WOOD
Photo Coordinator MAGGIE BLATTEL Advertising Business Manager BOB PARLAPIANO
Associate Photo Editor ERIKA THOMPSON Consumer Marketing Manager RACHEL BLACK
Production Director MELANIE STOLTENBERG
RESEARCH & COPY Production Manager COURTNEY PETERSON
Advertising Production Supervisor ALI FELSENTHAL
Research Director BARBARA BRANDON-CROFT Director of Quality JOSEPH KOHLER
Copy Chief JEAN RODIE Quality Analyst BEN ANDERSON
Prepress Desktop Specialist GREG FAIRHOLM
Copy Editor SHELLEY WOLSON
Test Kitchen Project Manager LINDA BREWER, R.D.N.
“I muttered that Deputy Managing Editor TARA LUSTBERG “My son
I was hungry, Executive Operations Coordinator, secretly added a
9 a.m. daily task
and my preschooler Office of Editor-in-Chief ADRIENNE FARR
presented me reminder to
Contributing Editors ANNA HELM BAXTER, my phone that says,
with a shiny red DAPHNE de MARNEFFE, Ph.D.,
apple.” ‘I love you.’ ”
SALLY KUZEMCHAK, R.D., ERIN ZAMMETT RUDDY,
COLBY SHARP, VIRGINIA SOLE-SMITH
DIGITAL MEREDITH NATIONAL MEDIA GROUP
Executive Editor JULIA DENNISON President, Meredith Magazines DOUG OLSON
Deputy Editor MELISSA BYKOFSKY Senior SEO Editor LIZ LASHWAY President, Consumer Products TOM WITSCHI
Features Editor ANNA HALKIDIS Social Media Editor GILLIAN NIGRO President, Chief Digital Officer CATHERINE LEVENE
Chief Business and Data Officer ALYSIA BORSA
SEO Writer NICOLE HARRIS Associate Editor LIBBY RYAN Chief Revenue Officer MICHAEL BROWNSTEIN
Associate Producer FRANCESCA SPATOLA Marketing and Integrated Communications NANCY WEBER
ADVISORY BOARD
Pediatrics ARI BROWN, M.D., DAVID L. HILL, M.D., Senior Vice Presidents
Consumer Revenue ANDY WILSON
HARVEY KARP, M.D., JANE MORTON, M.D., Corporate Sales BRIAN KIGHTLINGER
Direct Media PATTI FOLLO
NATALIE D. MUTH, M.D., M.P.H., R.D.N., IRWIN REDLENER, M.D., Research Solutions BRITTA CLEVELAND
Strategic Sourcing, Newsstand, Production CHUCK HOWELL
MICHAEL RICH, M.D., M.P.H., HARLEY A. ROTBART, M.D., Digital Sales MARLA NEWMAN
The Foundry MATT PETERSEN
DARSHAK SANGHAVI, M.D., JENNIFER SHU, M.D., Product and Technology JUSTIN LAW
WENDY SUE SWANSON, M.D., M.B.E.
Nutrition JILL CASTLE, R.D.N., CONNIE DIEKMAN, R.D.
Mental Health DAVID FASSLER, M.D., HAROLD S. KOPLEWICZ, M.D.,
REBECCA LANDA, Ph.D., TIMOTHY L. VERDUIN, Ph.D. Vice Presidents “My youngest
Finance CHRIS SUSIL daughter
Environmental Health AARON BERNSTEIN, M.D., M.P.H., Business Planning and Analysis ROB SILVERSTONE
Consumer Marketing STEVE CROWE tucked me in and
PHILIP LANDRIGAN, M.D. Brand Licensing TOYE CODY, SONDRA NEWKIRK wished me
Corporate Communications JILL DAVISON
Dentistry LEZLI LEVENE HARVELL, D.M.D. sweet dreams.”
“One year, Child Development and Behavior LISA DAMOUR, Ph.D., Vice President, Group Editorial Director LIZ VACCARIELLO
my four children WAYNE FLEISIG, Ph.D., EILEEN KENNEDY-MOORE, Ph.D., Director, Editorial Operations and Finance ALEXANDRA BREZ
each wrote me WENDY MOGEL, Ph.D., MICHAEL THOMPSON, Ph.D.
a love letter for my Women’s Health ALICE D. DOMAR, Ph.D.,
MARJORIE GREENFIELD, M.D., LAURA RILEY, M.D.,
birthday. I’ll treasure ALEXANDRA SACKS, M.D. MEREDITH CORPORATION
them always.” Education and Child Care DEBORAH STIPEK, Ph.D., President and Chief Executive Officer TOM HARTY
Chief Financial Officer JASON FRIEROTT
CATHY VATTEROTT, Ph.D. Chief Development Officer JOHN ZIESER
Chief Strategy Officer DAPHNE KWON
Allergy WILLIAM E. BERGER, M.D., HUGH SAMPSON, M.D. President, Meredith Local Media Group PATRICK McCREERY
Senior Vice President, Human Resources DINA NATHANSON
Emergency Medicine and Safety MARTIN EICHELBERGER, M.D.,
Chairman STEPHEN M. LACY
WENDY L. HUNTER, M.D., GARY A. SMITH, M.D., Dr.P.H. Vice Chairman MELL MEREDITH FRAZIER
Sleep JODI MINDELL, Ph.D., JUDITH OWENS, M.D.
Dermatology LAWRENCE F. EICHENFIELD, M.D.,
JODY ALPERT LEVINE, M.D.
© Copyright Meredith Corporation 2020. All rights reserved. Parents is a registered trademark of Meredith Corporation, registered at the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office.
Executive, editorial, and advertising offices: 225 Liberty Street, New York, NY 10281. Email: [email protected]. Submission of your material constitutes permission for Meredith Corporation to allow
its use in any media. Subscribers please note: Our subscribers list is occasionally made available to carefully selected firms whose products may be of interest to you. If you prefer not
to receive info from these companies by mail or by phone, please let us know. Send your request and your mailing label to Parents Customer Service, P.O. Box 37508, Boone, IA 50037-0508.
Subscription help: Visit us at parents.com/myaccount, email [email protected], or call 800-727-3682. For syndication or international
licensing requests or reprint and reuse permission, email [email protected]. Printed in the U.S.A.
EXPERIENCE
SKIN CARE INSPIRED
BODY WASH
SCAN TO BUY
Hover phone
camera
over code.
NO APP NEEDED
With ingredients
like vitamin C, collagen,
and hyaluronic acid.
I m p r o v e s S k i n 3 x B e t t e r*
*vs. leading body wash after 14 days of use, based on clinical moisture retention.
EDITOR’S NOTE
IN THIS ISSUE
Kindness Over a math genius or a sports HEROES OF THE YEAR
Everything phenom, but if they lord Our covers often spotlight
their accomplishments over
THERE IS NOTHING that on a bench in our driveway, others, bully their peers, or well-known artists and TOP LEFT: ZOE ADLERSBERG, WARDROBE STYLING BY CONNIE BERG. MAKEUP COURTESY OF MAKE UP FOR EVER.
makes my heart swell with waiting for people (repairmen, turn a blind eye to hardship, athletes—all inspirations, no
pride, in that palpable, delivery workers, his what’s the point? I know
I-might-tear-up-right-here- babysitter) to drive up so he you agree, because when we doubt. But I couldn’t let
on-the-sidewalk way, than can be the first person to say, polled more than 1,200 moms 2020 end without honoring
finding out that one of “Hello, what’s your name?” or and dads (see page 19 for
my kids has been kind. I still “I’m so glad you’re back!” His the full results), 73 percent frontline workers and
kvell thinking about the first friendliness is 100 percent of respondents said they their sacrifice. Cover stars
parent-teacher conference genuine—no ulterior motives, rank kindness as the quality Veronica and Luis Licea
I ever attended, when we no social ladder to climb. they most hope to instill
learned Joey had been Every person is his potential in their children, more than work as a nurse and a
handing out tissues to his new friend. intelligence (51 percent) or a firefighter-paramedic, all
fellow 2-year-olds anytime strong work ethic (51 percent). while raising three terrific
they cried. And I will never Let me pause to assure you Of the many things the kids. Look for our Reasons
forget the morning during that my children are not pandemic has taught us for Hope in America logo,
kindergarten drop-off when angels. In fact, I write to you (beyond the magic of 6 feet of and more stories of families
another parent told me that mere hours after one called distance), perhaps the most doing good, on page 30.
Joey had befriended her shy me “stupid head” and the important is that kindness is
child, helping him over his other refused two pieces of a life-giving force, and we THE PLAYBOOK
fear of school. My son had pizza—one for being too large, need more of it. “Generation EVERY PARENT NEEDS
noticed others in distress the other too small. But I share Kind” (page 16), the
and gone out of his way to their examples of real caring centerpiece of our second As you read this issue,
make a difference. because that’s what matters annual kindness issue, is a I hope you’ll take a minute
most. Without kindness, road map to making that
Then there’s Gabriel. At 3, nothing my kids do counts happen. All kids are kind, of with our new section,
his favorite activity is sitting for much. We can raise course, but while reading Playbook (page 9), and
this incredible package, I become the superfan that I
discovered there’s a lot more am. Part welcome mat for
we can do, big and small, the issue, part highlight
straightforward and subtle, reel, these pages have a mix
to supercharge this trait and of real-life parenting advice,
make sure it sticks around cool ways to keep the
beyond early childhood. kids entertained, items we
want in our shopping cart,
In a time of uncertainty and pops of celebrity and
and worry, it feels good to humor—all in short form for
take positive action. And with parents busy juggling.
that, I wish you a November
full of hope and healing, good
health and gratitude, and
moments of parental pride
that make your heart burst.
P.S. Election Day is November 3. Follow Me on Instagram
Don’t forget to vote!
Simply hover your phone’s
camera over the smart code to
see me raising my boys
while making a magazine.
We’re here to help. Email [email protected] to tell me about
the topics you’d like to see in future issues of Parents.
6P A R E N T S N O V E M B E R 2 0 2 0
MAKE
MERRY
LITTLE
MOMENTS
D
N
E
THI VOELI BLE
OM
AY
H
WFIETEHLS AT
TH E FES D
TAR B UCKS
Available where groceries are sold.
Starbucks and the Starbucks logo are registered trademarks of Starbucks Corporation used under license by Nestlé.
HappinessThe first trash bag Certain trademarks used under license from the Procter & Gamble Company or its affiliates.
worthy of a smile.
Glad Beachside Breeze
fig. 1
Time
The Happiest Trash Bag
With bright colors and scents, plus dual-layer strength,
it’s sure to put your trash in a better mood.
PROP STYLING BY RANDI BROOKMAN HARRIS. playbook
Your guide to making the days easier and the journey sweeter
LET
THERE
BE
DELIGHT!
Chase the Rainbow
A way for kids to get their creativity on and give you peace and quiet? Yesss! Try this trick the next time
you need your crew to entertain themselves for a stretch: Send them on a hunt-and-gather
mission throughout the house and yard, searching for items that match all the rainbow’s colors. (Pot-of-gold
bonus points if they declutter their rooms in the process!)
photograph by J O H N N Y M I LLE R
9P A R E N T S N O V E M B E R 2 0 2 0
P L AY B O O K
/ IF YOU ASK ME /
“My partner and I have
different feelings about screen time.
How to compromise?”
Three moms, no wrong answers
TEACH I can relate. My The partner who Recently, my CHILD WITH PILLOWS: ACHIM LIPPOTH. HEADSHOTS: COURTESY OF THE SUBJECTS.
YOUR husband and I sat prefers less screen time husband and I had a
CHILD down and talked must make an effort to meeting to discuss
TO ... about what was limits for our 4-year-old
driving our different play during the as we both thought
MAKE THEIR BED perceptions. We also no-screen time. My she was spending too
outlined what we husband doesn’t like it
The chore takes only a few agreed on—we both when our daughter much time with
minutes, or the length of your kid’s want our children watches more than an TV and YouTube Kids.
to spend more time hour of TV, but he also But as I was looking at
favorite Blippi song, and can doesn’t take much time TV with her one day, my
kick-start independence—i.e., you reading, being to engage with her husband came in and
outdoors, and doing without me, so she asked when it would
won’t have to help forever. activities that help often resorts to screens
for entertainment. be turned off.
1 their brain grow. However, I enjoy TV I was annoyed because
We’ve noticed that and like to expand on
PULL BACK THE COVERS. certain programs I had already told
Show your kid what their little show topics and our daughter this was
result in bad relate them to our lives.
legs have kicked, untucked, and tangled behavior like acting the last episode;
throughout the night. violent or fighting For example, we I didn’t need someone
and decided those were watching Disney’s
2 to watch over me to
aren’t allowed Descendants 2 make sure I was
LEARN ALL THE LAYERS. at all. Now when my and paused it at several
Have your child do a check around the bed: implementing our own
Is the fitted sheet still snug on the mattress? husband turns on points to ask, “What rules. So I would just
the TV for the kids, it would you do in say that once you agree
Have any pillows or loveys fallen to on terms, try not to
the floor? Then have them help pull up the top helps to know that situation?” and “manage” each other.
that it’ll be a show we even, “What hairstyle
sheet and blanket one by one, smoothing would you ask Dizzy —Linda Litton Davis, mom
as they go. A cheat to consider: Just stop both approve of. to give you?” Watching of two; Tulsa, OK
together can be fun.
using a top sheet. Kids can make —Amanda Gilman-Bogie,
a bed lightning-fast if they have only a mom of three; Berlin, VT —Hillary Fisher, mom of
one; Crofton, MD
duvet or a comforter.
/ LET IT GO /
3
“Never am I more of
GIVE IN ON THE STUFFIE. a fraud than when
Encourage your kid to plop anything I’m wearing my
‘Peace, Love, Yoga’
they desire on top—a unicorn tank top.”
stuffie and poop-emoji pillow are very much
@amomuncensored
welcome. Resist any urge to
redo their work. This helps remind
them it’s their space.
Sources: Marcy Isdaner, owner and director of Camp Mataponi,
a summer camp in Naples, Maine, who has been teaching kids
to make their bed for 27 years; Erin Zammett Ruddy, a Parents
contributing editor and author of The Little Book of Life Skills.
1 0P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
FLUSH-
ACTIVATED
ANTI-ODOR
TECHNOLOGY
STAMP
OUT
SMELLY ODORS
©2020 S.C. Johnson & Son, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
P L AY B O O K
/ THE HIGHS AND LOWS / / TAKE 5 /
Tia Mowry Door Prize for the Stressed
From starring in Netflix’s Anyone regularly hoisting a stroller
Family Reunion, which or slumping over a laptop has their share of
won an NAACP Image Award tight spots and tension. Tasha Holland-
for Outstanding Children’s Kornegay, Ph.D., founder of Wellness IRL, a
Program and has been platform that aims to reduce burnout in
renewed for a second season, health-care providers, recommends
to launching a new line of this simple daily stretch for those looking to
vitamins and supplements loosen up and relieve stress while they’re
at it: Stand in a doorway and extend
called Anser, Mowry has your arms toward the upper sides of the
been on a career roll. But the doorframe. Hold for 90 seconds
mom of Cree, 9, and Cairo, 2, and release.
will tell you that pandemic
parenting is more like, well, / CLICK ON THIS /
a roller coaster. FAC T- C H E C K
HISTORY
I feel like the best mom when ... and have activities to keep them MOWRY: STEVE GRANITZ/GETTY. FIELD: GUIDO COZZI/ATLANTIDE PHOTOTRAVEL/GETTY.
My children show me love. busy and entertained. AS A FAM I LY
Above all, that’s what I want them
to learn from me: how to love I am still figuring this out ... In a timely new guide on
unconditionally. The balance between being my kids’ Parents.com that we’re
best friend and being a disciplinarian. calling Education Reform,
I feel like the worst mom when ... I’m so good at creating boundaries experts explain how to
I lose patience, but I know it for myself, but for them, I just want talk to kids about topics in
happens to every parent. to be the fun mom and make my Black history that schools
children laugh. It’s hard when I need have historically left out or
Activity I love to do with my to be strict.
kids ... Watch movies and TV just gotten wrong.
shows. One of my favorite things
during quarantine has been Simply hover your phone’s
showing my kids all the movies I camera over the smart
grew up on. We also watched Sister,
Sister [her ’90s TV show with code, or go to parents.com/
twin Tamera], and Cree is now educationreform.
obsessed. To see him watch and
love what we did feels good.
Activity I hate to do with
them ... Schoolwork. Mommy
already went to school; she’s not
trying to go back!
Best trait a kid got from
me ... My sense of humor.
Cree is so fun and silly, and
he definitely inherited that
from me. We’re both social
butterflies.
Challenging trait a kid
got from me ... Cairo is so
persistent. She’ll do whatever it
takes to get what she wants, like
sitting with Daddy at breakfast
instead of staying in her high chair.
She never gives up, and neither do I.
Sometimes that’s a good thing,
sometimes it’s not.
I have this down to a science ...
Creating a schedule for my kids.
They eat and play at specific times
1 2P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
AADADCRAAKYPSSFUAPOLDETESS
AWAY.
20% Pure Vitamin C Serum.
High concentration. Proven results.
1 WEEK
for smoother, brighter skin.
4 WEEKS
visibly reduces the look
of dark spots.
#1 dermatologist recommended brand
©J&JCI 2020
P L AY B O O K
THE SHORT LIST
Your lineup of what’s new, novel, and nice to know
S O LV E EAT HOW I DO IT ... CLOCKWISE FROM TOP LEFT: FLOORTJE/GETTY; JJWITHERS/GETTY; COURTESY OF THE SUBJECTS; COURTESY OF THE PUBLISHER; COURTESY OF THE DEVELOPER; COURTESY OF THE BRAND.
When your fridge seriously can’t
fit another dish, lay two chopsticks Keep leftover cranberry Raising Kids in the
across the top of any foil-lined sauce from becoming U.S. While
container. It makes an instant the mystery Tupperware Still Learning the
steady surface to cram in that one container you avoid. Language
Instead, spoon the
last pan of mac ’n’ cheese. Eight years ago, I arrived in the United
Thanksgiving staple onto states from Argentina with my husband
BOND oatmeal and swirl it into and our daughters, Violeta and Nina, then
ages 3 and 1. All of us, in a sense, were born
Bust out Family muffin batter. Or get again that day. I had to learn language all
Conversation Cards at snazzy and add it to grilled over again. My husband and I had to figure
out the education and health-care systems.
the dinner table or cheese. (Hey kids, His job brought us to this country, but
the next family Zoom. “Owlette” sandwiches!) being parents threw us into the culture.
Questions like BUY I didn’t understand a single word during
“If you had a superpower, Violeta’s first parent-teacher conference.
Preteen elbowing you in I recorded the whole meeting with my
what would it be?” the kitchen? New York Times food phone and later listened to the audio with
help get everyone out of an English teacher who I hired for myself.
the usual “How’s school?” columnist Melissa Clark wrote To translate the school’s day-to-day
Kid in the Kitchen for ages 7 and up, communications, I created my own network
spiral. $26 for 100; of bilingual neighborhood parents who
boonsupply.com with 100 recipes they can try could help me. They’re still my best friends.
on their own, including granola,
I volunteered to go on as many field trips
burgers, and birthday cake. as I could as a way to be present for my
Extra-credit lessons: measuring kids, and the teachers gave me duties that
didn’t tax my speaking skills. I read to the
ingredients, capturing the girls—and still do—so that they love books
perfect Insta food shots, and—most in both English and Spanish. Homework
remains tough for me to help with. But
important—cleaning up though I might not be able to suggest words
like nothing ever happened. for them to use, I can impress upon them
the universal values of working hard,
$24; out November 10 trying their best, and not giving up. They
see me living those values as well.
DOWNLOAD
If there’s a parent from another country
The Lockitz! app gives your in your child’s school, the kindest thing
phone’s locked screen a set you can do is give them a smile (or a wave,
of colorful images and games that in these times). Make them feel
comfortable and seen. My world changed
keep your kids/phone the day a fellow school parent invited me
bandits occupied, so no more to a yoga class, where I met many more
moms. Never underestimate how much
having to worry they’re you can help just by including someone.
about to FaceTime your coworkers.
Julia Tortoriello lives in Brooklyn, N.Y. She is deputy
$4; iOS or Android editor of Parents Latina.
TANTRUM OF THE MONTH >>> “My kid heard, ‘Without bees, there’d be no food.’ He asked, ‘Even pickles?’ then lost his mind.” —Stephanie Reardon
14P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
Generation
KIND
We want our kids to be happy.
We want them to do well.
But most of all, we want them to be
forces for good in the world.
by M E R E D IT H B RYA N
FOR ANYONE WITH KIDS, 2020 has This year “has given parents an the most important trait to cultivate
been ... a lot. Parents faced a global health opportunity to consider who they want in kids, more critical than intelligence,
crisis, an economic collapse, a movement to be, and who they want their kids to individuality, or work ethic.
for racial justice—all with no child care. be,” says Tunette Powell, Ph.D., head of
We wrestled 5-year-olds into masks, had UCLA’s Parent Empowerment Project. In this moment of crisis, division, and
hard conversations at the dinner table. And it turns out that who—or, rather, our kids constantly sitting in our kitchen,
We became, quite literally, our children’s what—we want them to be is kind. there are signs that we’re putting our
teachers. But despite our (entirely ideals into practice. For one thing, more
forgivable) failings, there’s one way many When we asked 1,227 moms and dads of us are bringing up the hard stuff.
of us may yet succeed. And it has to do across the country what they value “Significant percentages of parents are
with our shifting parenting priorities. most, as part of the first-ever Parents talking to their kids about racism, about the
Values Study, they ranked kindness as police,” says Richard Weissbourd, Ph.D.,
1 6P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
a Harvard psychologist who directs part, with 70 percent of respondents British Columbia who studies kindness PREVIOUS SPREAD: ALEXANDRENA PARKER. THIS PAGE: STEFANO AZARIO/TRUNK ARCHIVE. OPPOSITE: MELANIE ACEVEDO.
the university’s Making Caring Common either sometimes or frequently using in schools and its effects on student
Project, which works with educators, their dollars to support companies that well-being. Teachers are ready to focus
families, and communities to teach give back to the community and on what to do, not on what not to do.
children about kindness and fairness. 46 percent engaging in charitable work.
“My guess is we’ll be seeing more focus Ferial Pearson, Ed.D., a professor at the
on ethical character and on being good That echoes a broader movement to University of Nebraska Omaha, has
human beings. People seem to be getting teach kindness to elementary-, middle-, implemented her Secret Kindness Agents
that we will destroy ourselves if and high-school students that has been project in more than 400 schools
we’re so narrowly focused on our own brewing across the country. Educators worldwide, encouraging kids to plan
self-interest.” Dr. Powell agrees. “I see have implemented kindness campaigns and carry out anonymous acts of
a shift,” she says, “toward teaching a to encourage students to do nice things kindness. (One kid rallied friends to
kindness rooted in social justice.” for others proactively. “People are keen to attend a school sporting event—girls’
invest their energy in the positive aspects basketball—that doesn’t draw a crowd;
The Parents Values Study also of kids’ behavior,” says John-Tyler Binfet, another wrote letters of thanks to the
showed that many of us are doing our Ph.D., a professor at the University of school’s custodial staff.) And there are
others, like the mindfulness-based
Kindness Curriculum, produced by
education researchers at the University
of Wisconsin-Madison, which has been
downloaded by more than 39,000
educators and parents around the world
and counting, and involves focusing
on breath, learning to tune into feelings,
and finding ways to create a cooperative
classroom. Harvard’s Making Caring
Common Project is working with college-
admissions offices across the country
to send the message that ethical character
is important to reduce academic
pressure on high-school students and
to increase equity in admissions.
Gen Z, which includes everyone born
after 1995, is absorbing the message. “The
youth give me hope,” Dr. Pearson says.
“My daughter and nieces and nephews
are giving each other affirmations on
TikTok. The Parkland kids are fighting
for gun reform. Kids are working
against climate change.”
The time for reinforcing kindness—and
not just between individual people,
but a broader sense of fairness, equality,
and empathy for all—is ripe. We have
the opportunity as parents to raise the
kindest generation. In this special section
of Parents, we’re exploring what it takes
to raise kids who greet the world with
compassion and humanity, as well as
spotlighting a few people who are leading
by example. Because, researchers say, while
part of raising kind kids is encouraging
them to show up for people who need them,
another big part is being kind ourselves.
“We can talk to our kids about all the
things that are happening, we can tell
them to be kind,” Dr. Powell says. “But
they’re going to do what we show them.”
1 8P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
What Matters to Parents Now
We asked, you answered: In our first-ever Parents Values Study, we polled more than 1,000
moms and dads of young children to find out what they want for their kids today and
tomorrow—and what hurdles they face in making that happen. Here are the surprising responses.
SOME OF YOU SEE EVEN SO, SOME HAVE FOUND REASONS
A LONG ROAD AHEAD TO BE OPTIMISTIC
of moms rank kindness 76% 58% “I have shown “I think there is
as the quality they most my daughter how to a lot more awareness in
of moms of dads children about bullying
hope to instill in express love and and mental health. They
their children—more than believe today’s kids are less kind kindness to everyone, have more information
than those of past generations,
intelligence (51%) or regardless of on ways to be kind.”
a strong work ethic (51%). pointing to bullying, too gender and ethnicity.”
much tech, and entitlement as — 3 2 -Y E A R - O L D
“I think parents — 3 1 -Y E A R - O L D MOM OF THREE
today have reasons for the shift. MOM OF ONE
a different focus AND MANY MOMS FELT
than our parents THE PANDEMIC HAS
did. It’s not ACTUALLY B EEN GOOD
about traditional FOR THEIR KIDS
success anymore;
67% said it’s strengthened
it’s about their family’s bond.
happiness and
36% think it will boost
kindness.” their kids’ resilience.
— 47-Y E A R - O L D
MOM OF ONE
“With the current 33% felt it’s increased
global situation, their child’s gratitude.
children cannot help
but be exposed LOOKING FORWARD
to the injustices,
and to some degree MOMS ARE DOING THEIR PART TO SERVE AS ROLE MODELS of moms say that
feel they have the maintaining close family ties
weight of the world 70% of moms believe that the key to raising a kind is the most important aspect
on their shoulders kid is to lead by example; 18% feel the best strategy
to fix it in the future.” is to encourage sharing and cooperation; and of their child’s future—far
10% say discussing current and historical kindness more than things like finding
— 3 5 -Y E A R - O L D role models is the most helpful strategy.
MOM OF TWO romantic love (31%) or
earning a high salary (19%).
of moms believe the
most important task of 39% OF MOMS PARTICIPATED IN COMMUNITY-FOCUSED EVENTS DURING THE PANDEMIC
parenthood is showing
“We put out a small shelf and “We made face masks “We’ve helped
a child how to be filled it with essentials. for others, donated elderly neighbors with
compassionate and kind,
People came to get only what to our local food bank, food, cooking, and
placing this above kids they needed. The shelf was and sent cards to grocery shopping.”
learning to be their authentic empty in two hours, and it
local EMS workers.” — 5 0 -Y E A R - O L D
selves (28%), becoming made us so happy as a family.” MOM OF TWO
successful high achievers — 5 1 -Y E A R - O L D
—32-YEAR-OLD MOM OF TWO MOM OF TWO
(16%), or possessing
intelligence (6%). Only 38%
believed that kindness
was what their own parents
felt was most important.
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
The Resilience-Kindness and values. Build this skill by have fewer suspensions,
Connection helping an upset kid dig into which correlate to being held
what’s wrong. Are they cranky back a grade, dropping out,
If you want to teach your child how to make because they’re hungry and or having run-ins with law
the world better, you first have to teach don’t realize it? Angry because enforcement. Black children
them how to make themselves stronger. they flunked a test and are are suspended or expelled
down on themselves? Ask, three times as often as white
by M E GA N B R A D E N - P E R RY “When did the feeling start? children, putting them at
What happened just before?” greater risk.
I WAS A public-school student developed SEL in 1968; it’s now Even if they can’t answer, MATTHIEU DORTOMB.
in the ’90s and a public-school used widely. In elementary orienting them in this way Experts say reinforcing
teacher in the 2010s—and the school, SEL can be taught in can pay off in self-reflective SEL at home is simply a
difference between how I was many ways: Kids might have behaviors as they grow, says matter of being a good parent:
taught and how I learned to a daily roundtable in which David LaViscount, Ph.D., “Everything about helping
teach is striking. When I was they compliment others on principal of Audubon Charter a child to be the best version
a kid, teachers might label a jobs well done. A teacher School-Gentilly, in New of themselves, to be able to
disruptive kid “bad” and eject might hand out a worksheet Orleans, which uses SEL. understand life, understand
them from class. Now kids are with a blank jigsaw puzzle for what’s happening, is
taught to calm big emotions kids to fill in, identifying the SELF-MANAGEMENT dependent on the kindness
through social and emotional pieces of who they are—soccer and love of parents,” says
learning (SEL), an approach player, sister, reader—to A child with strong self- Denese Shervington, M.D.,
used in many U.S. schools. develop self-knowledge. In management is able to cope M.P.H., CEO of the Institute
The thinking is simple: To middle school, a class might with stressors. Help them of Women & Ethnic Studies,
raise kinder kids, we must create a plan for resolving any create an area where they go a health organization. “When
teach them how to be kind to conflicts. These lessons touch to calm down, often called a a child gets their needs met,
themselves. That starts with on the “core competencies” Peace Corner. Providing a when they’re nurtured, they
mastering your emotions. SEL is designed to boost. space for the task of working internalize that as part of
to feel better can help kids who they are.”
James Comer, M.D., M.P.H., SELF-AWARENESS This is focus on actually doing it.
of Yale University School of the ability to grasp and HOW TO GET
Medicine’s Child Study Center, express your emotions, goals, SOCIAL AWARENESS This YOUR CHILD’S SCHOOL
is the capacity to both feel and
show empathy. To increase TO ADOPT SEL
it in your kid, discuss how First, approach the principal
people in life or on the screen with data: SEL has been
are feeling, and what you’d proven to raise math and
say to help them feel better. reading scores, GPAs,
attendance, and graduation
RELATIONSHIP SKILLS rates. (Hard to argue with!)
Next, head to the website of
These help a kid communicate, CASEL (casel.org), a nonprofit
listen, and collaborate. Boost that educates schools about
them by showing your child SEL, where you’ll find info
their feelings matter. At night, to help schools get started
ask what made them happy, with SEL implementation,
sad, scared, or confused that including a PowerPoint
day, and really listen and designed to convince the
respond to what they tell you. powers that be. (It’s on
the “Tools and Resources”
RESPONSIBLE DECISION page.) When your school’s
administration is ready
MAKING This is the ability to to move forward, they’ll
behave in a way that serves find even more assistance
yourself and others. To foster on the site, including an
this skill, model it: Let your interactive online platform
child see you being deliberate that explains how SEL can
in your decisions, taking care be put in place schoolwide,
to weigh others’ needs as well state-specific advice for
as your own. making SEL fit into your
state’s teaching guidelines,
The results of SEL can be and even financial strategies
profound. According to the for making SEL work in
American Journal of Public cash-strapped districts.
Health, schools that use it
2 0P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
Your Year-Round
Immune Support*
Solution for the
Whole Family!
** IRI MULO as of
March 22, 2020
From syrups to gummies, we o er many powerful ways to support your immune system*
with some of the best protection nature has to o er. Add Sambucol to your daily routine!
www.sambucolusa.com
*These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. These products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
The Family Kindness Challenge
Your crew can become more caring today! Here are 15 simple ways to get started.
by M E GA N B R A D E N - P E R RY
1 7 12
Make a chart. Leave an anonymous nice message. Assemble a care package.
Research shows that tracking During the pandemic,
kindness helps you keep it up. Next time you return a library book, tuck a note
FYI, your “chart” needn’t be between the pages. What should it say, you Girl Scout Troop 3743, of Ladera
fancy. Hang a piece of paper on Ranch, California, made
the fridge, then have your kids ask? Anything from “Have a great day” to “I hope
put a sticker beside their name you’re loving this book as much as I did.” self-care bags of bath bombs,
for every good deed they do. candles, and more for
8 10
2 health professionals. Perhaps
Study a new language Spot someone taking a selfie your troop could create a
Talk about what Corduroy together. in front of a local attraction?
the bear might be feeling. Ask if you can snap it for them. soothing bundle for your local
In one study, kids were asked Research shows that kids Or if someone looks lost, offer heroes, like teachers or your
exposed to multiple languages directions. They may seem small,
to discuss the emotions neighborhood delivery drivers.
of characters in books, while can better grasp others’ but these tiny kindnesses
another group just illustrated perspectives. So say bonjour, are rarer than you might think. 13
the story. Two months later, konnichiwa, or hujambo 11 Set up a free-lunch table.
the former group had a stronger to your Duolingo app. In April, a woman in Severna Park,
Take in a pet.
sense of empathy. 9 Maryland, began leaving
Studies show that bagged lunches on a folding
3 Step in mid-meltdown. having a pet increases
If you see a kid having a public empathy. (For info on table at a busy intersection
Give secret mini donations. freak-out, offer them a wave or a how to foster a rescue, anonymously, with a sign saying
Have your child put quarters joke—any distraction—and ask the the free meals would arrive each
in a vending machine’s coin head to page 162.)
return or come with you to frazzled mom if you can shop day at 11 a.m. If you can make
for her while she sees to her child. a few peanut-butter sandwiches
a store’s layaway counter to put and drag a card table out of the
money toward someone’s bill. PRISCILLA GRAGG.
attic, you’re well on your way.
Research has shown that seeing
others give can be contagious. 14
4 Ask your child about “extras.”
Do they own unread books or
Ask your kid to go the extra
mile (or a few extra feet). forgotten toys? Explain that some
kids don’t have enough of
Have your kid trek
to the end of the either, and see if your child will
help by parting with a few
driveway to spare the
mail carrier the hike. of theirs. Studies show that kids
are likelier to help those in need
5
if they understand what
While you’re at it, send others are experiencing. “This
a little snail mail. challenge is best for kids over
Give your kid some postcards, age 5, who better grasp that
stamps, pens, spelling not everyone has as much as they
advice, and free rein to make a do,” says psychologist Dawn
few peoples’ days with a card. Huebner, Ph.D., author of What to
6 Do When You Worry Too Much.
Try a meditation exercise. 15
“Compassion meditation” boosts
Explore the wide world
empathy. Ask your family to of wish lists.
think, eyes closed, about times
they’ve struggled and imagine You likely know that Amazon
offering themselves kindness. lets you make lists of must-haves
Have them repeat the for your next birthday or a baby
visualization imagining people shower, but one of our favorite
in their lives and what they ways to use the feature is
might be feeling, and offering to donate to children’s hospitals
them kindness too. This helps
us relate our troubles to those of and animal shelters all
others. Or try the three-minute over the country. Many maintain
loving-kindness session on the
lists of needed items, from
meditation app MyLife. loveys and educational toys for
hospitals to kibble and
chew toys for rescues. Make
deciding how to divvy
funds a fun family activity. (Just
google “Amazon wish list
children’s hospitals” or “Amazon
wish list animal shelter”
to find places in need.)
2 2P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
CARES HERE.
AND HERE .
M O RE CLE AN IN G RE DIE NT S T O DAY.
MORE RECYCLABLE PACKAGES TOMORROW.
You care about a clean future. And so do we.
Proven nutrition is at the heart of what we do. But it’s not all we do.
See our commitment to cleaner ingredients and a greener planet at
PURINA.COM/CARES.
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
Let’s Talk Privilege with privilege get to avoid bad things
that happen to others, like being treated
To stand up for what’s right in the world, we need to be harshly by the police. That’s wrong.’ ” To
attuned to what’s wrong. That’s where you, provoke their sense of justice, ask your
child how they would feel if, say, you told
your kid, and this essential conversation come in. them they couldn’t have dessert because
they have dimples but gave their sibling
by J U N O D E M E LO ice cream because they don’t.
IF YOU’VE EVE R been around a small Studies also indicate that if children The main lesson is that if someone
child, you know they are excellent realize they’re getting a bigger piece has privileges others don’t, it’s their job
noticers, picking up on even minute of the pie, they not only tend to share but to help level things out by sticking
aspects of their environment. They also inspire others to follow suit. up for people without privilege. Start by
perceive when a person’s skin color differs “When one person acts in a prosocial seizing on teachable moments when
from theirs or if someone is differently way, others do too,” says Dr. Braaten. your kids respond to differences they
abled or a person of size. What they need “Not out of pity, but because they’re see. Though it’s natural to want to
help understanding, though, is how such concerned about someone else’s rights shush them, doing so can reinforce that
factors can lead to differences in how and feelings.” Here’s how to get the “there’s something bad about noticing
people are treated. privilege conversation started. difference, and this is where stereotypes
begin,” says Derald Wing Sue, Ph.D.,
Privilege is a word we’ve heard a lot For preschoolers professor of psychology and education
lately—in books, on the news, in Instagram at Teachers College, Columbia
captions. As you no doubt know, it refers “A 3-year-old understands fairness and University, and author of Race Talk and
to the means by which people are granted unfairness,” says Dr. Tatum. “You can the Conspiracy of Silence. If your
advantages because of how they look, say, ‘Privilege means you’re getting more preschooler calls out someone’s skin
where they live, how much money they goodies because you have light skin color or small stature, try saying,
have, their religion, and more. or you’re a boy. And sometimes people
To those with privilege, it can be nearly It’s never
invisible. Which is precisely why it needs too early to start
to be discussed. The earlier you talk about
the benefits that bias—be it homophobia, tackling
sexism, racism, or ableism—gives some this subject.
and denies others, the better the chances
of raising a child who wants to work to PRISCILLA GRAGG.
eliminate privilege. But even parents who
see themselves as socially conscious may
not know how to broach this subject.
“You may think that if parents are not
expressing negative attitudes, kids will
get the right messages, but children still
pick up on societal attitudes and draw
their own conclusions,” says Beverly
Daniel Tatum, Ph.D., a psychologist and
author of Why Are All the Black Kids
Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? “If you
want your kids to value justice, you have
to shape that value through dialogue.”
Addressing privilege is an integral
part of raising a kind child. “Helping kids
think about what they have makes them
think about what others don’t have, and
awareness shapes prosocial behavior,
or acting in a way that benefits others,
which is basically what kindness is,”
says Ellen Braaten, Ph.D., codirector
of the Clay Center for Young Healthy
Minds and associate professor of
psychology at Harvard Medical School.
2 4P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
Clicks ClosedTM is a trademark of Reynolds Consumer Products LLC.
CLOSE
WITH
CONFIDENCE
CLICKS closed?
CLOSED
Click !
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
“People come in all different shades, How Kids Become Kind,
shapes, and sizes. Isn’t that wonderful?” Step-by-Step
Diversifying their bookshelf, toy chest,
and your own social circle also helps. If you’re aiming to raise an especially gentle, loving child, you might feel a surge
of concern when they refuse to share, get mad when you veto their wish
For Elementary-Schoolers
to swing from the curtains, or scream that they hate you. But here’s the thing
Help your child pick out real-world about kindness: It doesn’t develop overnight. “To be kind requires a pretty
examples of privilege. If you go to the
toy store and almost all the dolls are complex series of thoughts and behaviors,” says Dona Matthews, Ph.D., coauthor
white, or you read a book together in of Beyond Intelligence: Secrets for Raising Happily Productive Kids.
which boys go on epic quests while girls
stay in a castle pining for their return, “You need to be able to identify another person’s emotions, feel a connection
say what’s at play: Someone in this to that person, and then act on it.” While every little one will move
scenario has an unfair advantage over
the other, and it’s not right. through this process at their own pace, here are the major kindness milestones
to look for—and some easy ways to nudge your kid along.
Also, introduce historical books that
celebrate abolitionists and allies—people AGE 3 AGES 5–6
who were not persecuted but fought for
those who were. “In almost any situation, Kids Get Why Feelings Occur Kids Grasp the Idea of
there is evidence of people using their Community
position to help,” Dr. Tatum says. “That While infants can perceive other
story needs to be visible to kids. If we talk people’s emotions by 6 months, it isn’t Compassionate acts don’t occur just
only about racism and not resistance, until well into toddlerhood that a kid’s between individuals; they are also
there’s no model for how to be an ally.” actual acts of kindness start to emerge.
done to benefit a group. At this age,
For Preteens Why? Because they’re still learning your kid might be more eager to do
cause and effect. “By age 3, they’ve
In this stage, it’s important that kids not things like clear the table so the family
only recognize any privilege they have figured out that certain events can head to the couch for movie night.
but also step up when they see the world make someone feel a certain way,”
reinforce it. You need to be the one “Feeling like an important member of
who shows them how. That could mean Dr. Matthews says. “They know a group helps kids feel valuable, which
interrupting microagressions—which that if someone doesn’t get a cookie
Dr. Sue describes as “the slights that leads them to act more kindly,” says
even well-intentioned people make” they want, they feel sad or angry, Dr. Matthews. Encourage this by giving
toward marginalized people—with what and if they do get the treat, they feel
he calls “microinterventions.” Say, happy.” Help solidify this connection them little chores starting from as
speaking up at the family barbecue young as age 2; even having them put
when a relative derides gay marriage. by labeling emotions your child
Or encouraging your kid to comfort a experiences and explaining why they a single toy away is groundwork. This
classmate who’s teased for wearing age is also when your child becomes
secondhand clothes and having a beat-up might feel that way: “You’re happy
family car. Or asking whether they’d like because you wanted to go outside, more adept in showing appreciation.
to attend a school meeting with you to “You’ll notice them speaking in a kinder
argue for hiring more teachers of color. and now here we are!”
tone, saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’
Bottom line: It is important to help AGES 4–5 more consistently,” Dr. Akbar says. As
a child see that whatever privileges they
have were not earned, and so there is Intentional Kindness always, you’ll want to reinforce
work to be done. Namely, they need to use Ramps Up that good behavior to keep it coming.
their privilege to help those who don’t
have it, whether by telling the principal During this period, your child AGES 7–8
if a student of color is mistreated by strengthens what’s known as the
a teacher or asking a differently abled Kids Learn to Put Others First
person if they’d like some help holding theory of mind, or the ability
the door. Not every kid is a born activist, to grasp their own mental state and As children get older, their acts of
says Dr. Braaten, “but you do need to kindness grow more sophisticated, but
ask, ‘What do you want to do?’ It’s not okay that of others. In addition, big, this is the last real childhood milestone,
to sit by. It’s a tough conversation, but exciting connections are being made
this is the age to have it.” and it involves the trickiest task of all.
in brain areas responsible for It’s one thing to be kind when it costs
social awareness. One result of this
perfect storm of neurology? Your nothing, but it’s harder to overcome
your own disappointment or sadness to
child starts to show kindness
consistently. Researchers from the be good to someone else. That’s why
this milestone doesn’t usually happen
University of Virginia found that until age 7 or 8 (thanks to the maturing
after being given a stash of stickers,
of the frontal lobe that occurs
most 3-year-olds won’t share then). A classic example: being able to
with another child—but most 4-year-
congratulate a kid who beat you in
olds will. “Around age 4, kids a game. As in so many instances, this is
make a mental shift,” says Maysa Akbar,
where it’s key for parents to model
Ph.D., author of Beyond Ally and what they’d like to see. “Your kids are
a licensed psychologist with the Yale
watching,” Dr. Akbar says. “If they
Child Study Center. “They want to see you being generous even when it’s
engage in a more meaningful way, and
you see more sharing, holding hands, difficult to do so, they will be more
likely to mimic the behavior.” So the next
and hugging.” When you witness
your child being kind in these ways, time your kid beats you at checkers,
make a show of being a good sport.
really (and vocally) celebrate it.
You’ll all win in the long run.
—Alice Oglethorpe
2 6P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
TODAY’S FORECAST:
100% CHANCE OF
HYDRATED SKIN.
Clinically proven to lock in hydration
with Hyaluronic Acid.
Skin so supple and hydrated,
it bounces back.
© J&JCI 2019
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
But What Do I Do When My Kid Is Unkind?
On the road to altruism, there are sure to be speed
bumps. Here’s how to correct not-so-nice behavior when you see it.
by I N G E L A R AT LE D G E A M U N D S O N
COOKIE S AND MILK. Bert you.) Be sure to practice what Appeal to their that when they do something DAYMION MARDEL.
and Ernie. Discipline and you preach: If you sing the empathy. wrong, they do something
kindness? That last pairing praises of altruism but then Even as kids mature and to make up for it,” Dr. Lickona
may sound like a less-than- hulk out on anyone who unkind acts become more says. “First, they should
dynamic duo—who wants to cuts the carpool line, your verbal and less physical, apologize, then ask, ‘What can
“punish” a kid into being brood’s not gonna buy in. explaining that they’ve hurt I do to make it better?’ ” You
good?—but the two go hand in someone is still your best can help brainstorm—maybe
hand. “The word discipline Tackle infractions. move. “Most kids don’t set out they’ll end up writing an “I’m
comes from the Latin With a solid framework in to do harm,” says J. Kiley sorry” card or use allowance
word for ‘instruction,’ ” says place, you’re armed to correct Hamlin, Ph.D., a psychology money to replace a smashed
Thomas Lickona, Ph.D., missteps. Whether your child professor at the University of toy—but they’ll often hit
a developmental psychologist mistreats you, a sibling, a British Columbia who studies the mark themselves. In some
and author of How to Raise peer, or the family pet, address child behavior. “If they’re able cases, it may be enough
Kind Kids. “In a character- the behavior swiftly and to grasp what they’re doing to request a redo: “Can you
based approach to parenting, definitively. “Use a strong, to the other person, the cost please try that again in a
discipline is used to teach firm, non-yelling statement becomes greater than the kinder, more respectful way?”
habits like kindness and that spells out what went benefit to them.”
respect.” To be truly effective, wrong,” Dr. Borba explains. Enforce consequences.
it takes a multipronged plan “Say, ‘That was unkind. You Help them make Depending on the seriousness
with consequences that differ just pulled your friend’s amends. of the incident, an additional
from the same old time-outs hair. How do you think she Of course, acknowledgment punishment may be required
and talking-tos. feels? How would you feel if isn’t enough; restitution is also to make a lasting impression.
that happened to you?’ ” in order. “Kids need to learn Avoid the impulse to leverage
Set clear expectations. whatever they hold dear, like
It’s not so much laying ground screen time or dessert, in favor
rules, per se, as creating of a tailored response. (If big
a mission statement that brother pushed little brother
establishes kindness as a off a bike, then it tracks
nonnegotiable part of your that his own wheels should be
family’s ethos. “Have a talk taken away; banning video
about what you stand for,” says games is just arbitrary.) It’s the
Michele Borba, Ed.D., author classic “make the punishment
of Unselfie: Why Empathetic fit the crime” approach, and
Kids Succeed in Our All-About- it works. “The consequence
Me World. You can even come should be relevant in both
up with a cute motto like kind and strength,” Dr. Hamlin
“We’re the Caring Carlsons!” cautions. “If it’s unfair,
random, or unnecessarily
Reinforce those values. punitive, it could backfire.”
Look for opportunities to
discuss that ethos—pointing Tell them they’re good.
out scenarios that crop up in No matter what, keep
movies, books, and real life—so reiterating how kindhearted
your kids develop a concept your kids are, even in the
of what’s considered okay. bleakest of moments; the
If one cartoon character message will sink in. “Tell
hurts another, talk about the them, ‘You are a kind person,
implications and why it’s and that wasn’t kind,’ ”
not acceptable. (The kids may Dr. Borba says. “Ultimately,
not love the interruption, kids will act the way they
but trust that they do hear see themselves to be.”
2 8P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
BES T OF BEA
ER 2020
UTY
AWA RD WINN
2020 Allure Best of Beauty Award Winner, OGX Extra Strength Damage
Remedy + Coconut Miracle Oil Shampoo
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
The Kindness
Hall of Fame
We’re shining a light on moms, dads,
and kids who stepped up in
ways big and small during the pandemic,
proving that even when life feels
impossible, we can all still do our part.
by CA R L A B R U C E - E D D I N G S / photographs by M A R K W I LLI A M S + SA R A H I R A K AWA
The Everyday Heroes day,” she says. “He felt like he had to At first, her Oakland hospital was eerily
figure out, ‘How do we protect ourselves?’ calm. “Experts were saying, ‘Don’t go to
The Licea family: Veronica, Luis, I just felt like I was kind of swimming.” the hospital unless you absolutely have
Luis II, 15, Bela, 15, and Mia, 4 to,’ ” Veronica says. “So it was awkward
Alameda, CA Many parents recognize this dread, silence for us. In the E.R. we never say
but for the Liceas, it soon escalated from ‘It’s quiet today,’ because as soon as you
VE RO NICA LIC E A can’t pinpoint when concern to daily reality. A firefighter- do, patients roll in. I remember thinking
she and her husband, Luis, realized the paramedic, Luis is the first port of call it was strange how empty it was—and
pandemic would upend their close-knit for those who need emergency transport then suddenly it wasn’t.”
family. At first, they felt a sense of doom. to a hospital; Veronica is an E.R. nurse.
“Luis anxiously watched the news all
3 0P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
spent as a family were not always easy. PREVIOUS SPREAD: WARDROBE STYLING BY LISA MOIR. HAIR AND MAKEUP BY TRICIA TURNER. ON BELA: SHIRT, MADEWELL. JACKET, URBAN OUTFITTERS. SKIRT, LEVIS. ON LUIS II: DENIM SHIRT, T-SHIRT,
Exhaustion and frustration bubbled AND PANTS, ZARA. ON MIA: ROMPER AND SHIRT, ZARA. THIS PAGE, BOTTOM RIGHT: ON VERONICA: SHIRT, JACKET, AND JEANS, MADEWELL. ON MIA: SWEATER, MISHA AND PUFF. ON LUIS: PANTS, J.CREW.
up—and sometimes spilled over.
“It’s hard that the kids don’t know
what you deal with all day, and you come
home and they’re saying, ‘We’re out of
chips,’ and you’re thinking, ‘I watched
someone pass without their family
today,’ ” Veronica says. “But I had to put
that away. For them, losing school and
their social lives, parenting a little kid, is
huge.” The family began writing to each
other, with the rule that they wouldn’t
speak about the contents of their letters.
“It provides them with a safe place
to communicate, and gives us time and
space to give a well-thought-out
response,” Veronica says.
What has emerged most strongly for
Veronica is pride in how ably the family
met this challenge, and the enduring love
they all share. “It’s beautiful to see
how close our kids are. We’re a blended
family—when Luis and I met, our older
kids were both 5, and now they basically
live like twins.” Veronica and Luis
marvel at how capably the teens care for
Mia and have been moved, Veronica says,
to see their children find the good in
an impossible time: “Every day, we all say
what we’re grateful for. We have this
home. We live near the ocean. We’re safe,
we’re healthy. And we have each other.”
In mid-March, breathless patients crept across Alameda County, which
began calling 911 and arriving at the E.R. would go on to have thousands of cases.
in droves, and both Luis and Veronica (At press time, there have been nearly
saw that they’d be working long hours, 20,000.) To decontaminate, Luis
facing countless exposures, and seeing showered at the firehouse. Veronica “took
little of their kids or each other. They everything off in the garage and put it
worked on little sleep, nerves raw. “We in a designated area. Luis would leave a
were in a state of shock,” says Veronica. clean robe in the garage, and I would
“I looked at my husband and said, ‘We put it on, come in, shower, and change.”
have to do what we can with what we have. Every day, after every shift.
We just have to keep doing our jobs.’ ”
Luis II and Bela provided full-time
Parents to 15-year-olds, Luis II and child care for their toddler sister, all while
Bela, as well as a 4-year-old daughter, coping with the difficulties of virtual
Mia, Veronica and Luis strategized learning and the loss of freedom and
ways to keep their kids safe as the virus friends. The rare evenings the Liceas
3 2P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
HOLIDAY PRELUDE
2020
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
Jahkil’s signature slogan—”Don’t Wait
to Be Great”—adorns T-shirts sold
on his website, OfficialProjectIAm.com.
The Visionary donated items like tissues, Masks, gloves, cleaning
toothpaste, and water—to the supplies, and toilet paper
Jahkil Jackson, 12 city’s street population. “The were all frighteningly
Chicago, IL community has embraced scarce—and all found their
Jahkil,” says his mother, way into Jahkil’s packages.
IN MARC H , just before much Jahkil was 8 in response to Na-Tae’ Jackson. “They think
of the country entered rampant homelessness in he’s admirable and adorable, Now he has higher hopes
lockdown, Jahkil Jackson and his hometown of Chicago, the and we love showing the for Project I Am, including a
his family rang in the fourth project distributes needed good side of Chicago. The plan to build tiny homes in
birthday of his nonprofit, supplies—via “Blessing Bags,” media would have you believe Chicago. “The big picture is
Project I Am. Created when filled with manufacturer- everything in this city is to demolish homelessness,”
negative. That’s not true.” Jahkil says. “It’s a big goal,
but I hope to accomplish it.”
As COVID-19 spread, Ambition comes easily
Jahkil, his family, and their to Jahkil, who’d also like to
team of volunteers, which can mentor kids across the
range from ten to 200 on any country to help them start
given day, shifted their focus. their own projects. “My
In addition to helping those message is: Don’t wait to be
experiencing homelessness, great,” he says. “I believe
Jahkil knew the elderly kids can be change agents just
could benefit from his bags as well as adults can. Find
too. Says Na-Tae’, “Senior something you’re passionate
citizens were not receiving about, and translate that
basic necessities because into making a difference in
local stores were sold out.” your community.”
The Secret Agent the signs when no one was
around, the family found a
Addison Watrous Lowry, 8 way to protect her while still
Andover, KS allowing her to give back.
Addison was caught just once,
I N TH E E ARLY days of the and other workers a small Born at 26 weeks, Addison by a hospice worker who was FROM TOP: SOCKO; COURTESY OF THE SUBJECT.
pandemic, when essential but heartfelt boost. Having has underdeveloped lungs, stunned, then moved. She
workers toiled for hours tackled her neighborhood, says her mother, Stephanie gave one convenience-store
at great personal risk, many Addison kept going, leaving Lowry. So keeping her safe clerk a sign directly, thanking
Americans felt gratitude. signs for friends of friends during the outbreak was him for risking his life to
Addison Watrous Lowry, a who braved the virus at work. crucial—and yet, by placing provide people with goods.
bubbly Kansas 8-year-old, He broke down in tears.
felt it enough to put pen (and
stickers!) to paper, creating When asked how she thinks
signs thanking frontliners other kids can spread joy,
for their service—and, with Addison has plenty of ideas.
a dash of whimsy, secretly “You could call your friends to
installing them on their lawns. cheer them up,” she says. “You
Inspired by her aunt, an E.R. can write letters, and then
nurse, Addison asked her mom you could be pen pals! Or you
to buy supplies, then made can leave letters or pictures
posters that said, “Heroes on people’s cars or doors
Live Here” in rainbow letters, thanking them for their help.
to offer local nurses, doctors, You can just say ‘thank you.’ ”
3 4P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
“The Kicker” “The Flamingo” “The Irish Stepdance”
100%UPTO leak free,
no matter how you sleep
Always Overnight pads have a 2X larger back*
for up to 10 hours of protection while you sleep.
E LEAKGUARULTIMATD™
*vs. Always Maxi Regular with wings 10up to
© Procter & Gamble, 2020 hrs
2X
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
Dr. Blackstock
and sons
Ellington, 3 (left),
and Cameron, 5,
in Brooklyn,
New York
LAST SPRING, AS DROVES The Advocate with health-care companies Twitter. Black maternal COURTESY OF THE SUBJECT.
to help them improve the mortality rates, COVID
of coughing, feverish Uché Blackstock, M.D. care they offer people of vaccines, how worried people
people came to the Brooklyn Brooklyn, NY color, Dr. Blackstock holds should be about in-person
urgent-care clinic where workshops and speaking school: Dr. Blackstock has
Uché Blackstock, M.D., sees across the country, the effect engagements to illuminate the weighed in on all of the above.
patients, the doctor noticed a was troubling: White people reality of racialized medicine
problem. Given how limited were more likely to be tested, and teach ways to address it. Speaking up about systemic
COVID tests were, doctors so only they could know for issues can be a draining task,
were told to test only those certain that they’d been “I see my role as a trusted especially when it feels as if
who had visited a place where around someone with COVID. leader who is compassionate the dangers are compounding
cases were surging or had The criteria’s bias was clear. and thoughtful, and who can by the day. But the Harvard
been in contact with someone amplify the concerns and grad is well poised to muscle
confirmed to have the virus. The pandemic has priorities of my community,” through tough times. Her
Most of Dr. Blackstock’s white disproportionately impacted she says. “I’m also purpose- mother, Dr. Dale Blackstock,
patients met one or both people of color, for whom driven; my work has to align who raised Uché and her
criteria and were tested. Few underlying health conditions, with my values.” This passion twin sister, Oni, was also a
of her patients of color did, higher stress, and a greater is clear in the sage guidance Harvard Medical School
so they were not. But since this likelihood of being essential she’s shared on outlets like alumna; she died at age 47 of
scenario was playing out workers increases risk. This C-SPAN, Yahoo News, and leukemia. Losing her mother
is just the sort of health at such a young age is what
inequity Dr. Blackstock now inspired Uché not only to
fights. The founder of pursue a career in medicine
Advancing Health Equity, a but also to dedicate her life to
consulting firm that partners advocating for better health
outcomes for people like her
mother. (Dr. Oni Blackstock
also attended Harvard
Medical School, making the
pair of sisters the school’s
only Black female mother-
daughters legacy attendees.)
While our ongoing public-
health crisis has wearied
all health-care workers,
Dr. Blackstock included, she
sees the need for a brighter
outlook as we head into the
future. “I’m a parent of two
small children”—her sons
are 3 and 5—“so I absolutely
understand the fatigue
parents are feeling,” she says.
“I miss when conversations
didn’t only revolve around
coronavirus. But by nature,
I’m an optimist. So I’m
focusing on when we get
there again.”
3 6P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
Hospitals choose us first
because we put gentle first.
Formulated for baby’s delicate skin,
which is up to 30% thinner than adult skin.
Pediatrician-tested. Hypoallergenic and
free of dyes, parabens, and phthalates.
©Johnson & Johnson Consumer Inc. 2020
Use products only as directed
SPECIALÑKindness in 2020
The Communicator
Michael Doggett
Frederick, MD
M I C H A E L D O G G E T T always Then the pandemic hit, and The Jokester
knew he’d be a teacher, like his just like that, the burgeoning
mom and grandmother. But it rappers lost their outlet. Ethan LyBrand, 11
was during his pre-pandemic Via Zoom one day, Doggett Decatur, AL
stint at a Maryland middle performed a rap for his
school that he discovered his students to assess how they M U STE RI N G A S M I LE when with the disease seriously. BOTTOM LEFT: COURTESY OF THE SUBJECT. TOP RIGHT: LYBRAND FAMILY/MUSCULAR DYSTROPHY ASSOCIATION.
true teaching talent: hip-hop. were feeling in isolation: “Hey life gets hard can be a tall But not too seriously.
students / What you been order. Unless you’re lucky “Laughing has always helped
“My fellow teachers and doin’? / How many pairs of enough to be in the vicinity of me,” he says. “I use jokes
I were a diverse group, and we pj’s have you ruined?” They apple-cheeked cutup Ethan to reach people, especially in
were committed to changing loved it. It occurred to LyBrand, that is. During tough times like these.”
a system we knew firsthand Doggett that it need not be a the height of the pandemic, Normally, the MDA National
was rooted in systemic one-off; it could help him Ethan made it his singular Ambassador would travel
racism,” Doggett says. After and the Empower Hour kids mission to spread happiness around the country to meet
seeing that many students of stay connected. The Hey to those who needed it (which people and raise awareness,
color had trouble expressing Students raps continued, was, let’s face it, all of us), but in compliance with social
themselves in class, Doggett Hip Hop Empower Hour was posting one goofy joke per distancing, particularly
started a hip-hop-based reborn virtually, and in day on social media. Here’s important for people with
elective course called Hip Hop May, after Chance the Rapper a classic example: “What underlying health conditions,
Empower Hour, in which heard about Doggett’s do you call a fake noodle? An Ethan had to find another
students could analyze music, doings, he gave him a $30,000 impasta!” way of connecting—which is
then write and perform their prize during his Teacher what led to his 42-day streak
own. The course helped them Appreciation Week awards. Ethan, diagnosed with of social-media funnies. As
feel they had both a voice that Duchenne muscular he explains, “I’ve always had
deserved to be heard and a The raps kept Doggett’s dystrophy at 2 years old, is now a knack for making people
place to use it. “Seeing that I students engaged with the Muscular Dystrophy laugh. And I figured the world
was able to change this broken schoolwork—and him. “I had Association’s (MDA) National really needed a reason to
system in a small way was missed the daily interactions Ambassador, and takes his smile, so a joke series just
empowering,” Doggett says. so much, and worried they role as a representative for made sense.”
Kids recorded flows about would become difficult during the thousands of people living
everything from Chipotle’s distance learning,” he says.
burritos to being late for class. “But I made lifelong memories
In advance of the rap showcase with many of my students
each year, the tracks were during that time. It was an
played over the intercom so the experience I don’t think any
whole school could sing along. of us will forget.”
Top: Ethan poses for a photo
with his sister, Chloe, in Decatur, Alabama.
Left: Doggett in his element.
3 8P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
1 in 2 kids is underhydrated.
-American Journal of Public Health
Access to Creative Roots has
been clinically shown to increase
hydration levels in children.
1g of sugar
Taste kids love
Plant-powered hydration
1Harvard School of Public Health article
https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/news/press-releases/study-finds-inadequate-hydration-among-u-s-children/ ,
Kenney E, et al. Prevalence of Inadequate Hydration Among US Children and Disparities
by Gender and Race/Ethnicity: National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey, 2009–2012.
Am J Public Health. 2015;105:e113–e118
2Dr. Douglas Casa, “Nutrition, Urinary Markers and Sleep Habits in Children”
HELP THEM __WHEN TO GET A FLU SHOT____
THRIVE ___BAKING TOGETHER______
IN EVERY WAY
_ _ _UPDATED FABLES FOR KIDS_ _ _ _
Screen
Time You
Can Get
Behind
We tapped tech and
education experts
for their picks in
the crowded kids’
app space, then gave
a panel of junior
testers permission
to play. What we
discovered: Great
learning apps are
almost as hard to
find as disinfectant
wipes—but they
do exist. Here are
some gems to
help you out this
school year.
by K A R E N C I C E R O
photograph by
PRISCILLA GRAGG
4 1P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
K I D S ÑTe c h
Multiple
Subjects
BEST FOR SKILL BUILDING
Khan Academy Kids
Five animal characters guide
kids in hundreds of games,
lessons, and stories vetted by
early-childhood education
experts. Whether your child
needs to learn how to print their name,
take measurements, or count backward,
there’s a lesson in the app’s well-organized
“library.” Beginning readers will also score
a robust set of e-books. “I like that there’s an
option to read the story aloud or listen to
it,” says Dominique Pompey, a kindergarten
teacher in San Diego. Ages 2 to 7, free
BEST FOR TODDLERS BEST FOR LEARNING SHAPES BEST FOR TELLING TIME MOTHER AND DAUGHTER: CATHERINE DELAHAYE/GETTY. APP TILES: COURTESY OF THE COMPANIES.
Hungry Caterpillar Play School Little 10 Robot: Goodness Shapes Tic Toc Time
A calming intro to the digital The fun games work on This Tic Toc deserves more
world, this app features familiar all components of shape than a 15-second shout-out for
characters from Eric Carle’s recognition: matching, making it easier for kids to
books, along with clear identifying, and naming. Our grasp how to read an analog
directions and slower-paced preschool testers felt proud clock, says Wendy Hilton,
play. Many activities focus on math or when they loaded ten shapes (including co-owner of HipHomeschoolMoms.com.
reading, but the relaxation techniques, like a hexagon) onto a Ferris wheel. Woo-hoo! After a beaver shows kids how to read and
using a Brown Bear to encourage mindful Ages 2 to 4, $2, only for Apple devices set a cuckoo clock, the app challenges
breathing, come in handy. Ages 2 to 5, them to press a button when the ticking
free one-week trial, $8 per month to join BEST FOR MATH FACTS clock displays the same time as the digital
readout. Ages 6 to 10, $4 for Apple devices,
BEST EDUCATIONAL VIDEOS Number Run $5.50 from Google Play, $5 from Amazon
BrainPOP Jr. This brainy twist on Temple Reading &
Run helps kids master Writing
After watching a few of these math drills that advance from
three- to five-minute animated single-digit addition to BEST FOR LEARNING TO READ
videos about famous people, division. For each of the more
places, or concepts, you’ll than 50 levels, they have to quickly solve Read Along by Google
realize two things: You forgot problems so their avatar can jump over
a lot of what you learned in third grade, cliffs and dodge monsters to reach a Thanks to advances in speech
and these “movies” are really well done. treasure chest. Our testers liked earning recognition, this new app
“One video introduced my 8-year-old coins to “buy” new avatar outfits, can tell which words kids are
to the Alamo,” says Jeanette Leon Go, of including—we kid you not—a Santa suit. stumbling over as they read
Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. “He likes the whole They also repeated levels to shave one of 500-plus globally
collection because he thinks Moby, the robot seconds off their time. Ages 6+, $3, minded stories. It underlines a word that’s
cohost, is funny.” Ages 5 to 9, free movie of not available from Amazon skipped and awards stars for ones spoken
the week, $6 per month for full access correctly. Kids can click on a word they
don’t know and a “reading buddy” will help.
Math BEST FOR LOGIC BUILDING You can set the app for Spanish, French,
Chinese, or other non-English options.
BEST FOR COUNTING Dragonbox Numbers
Will They Work on
Moose Math Focusing on “number sense” My Device?
rather than memorization,
The Pet Bingo game and this app’s coolest feature Unless noted otherwise,
making smoothies are is puzzles mode. That’s you can download all featured
disguised counting lessons. where kids drag Nooms,
Rewards entice kids to keep various-size characters that represent apps from the App Store,
playing. “During quarantine, different numbers, into spaces to Google Play, and Amazon.
my kindergartner took on increasingly complete a picture. They can also feed
difficult levels so she could expand on the or slice Nooms to watch numbers grow
town she had begun building,” says Tenaya or shrink. For instance, when cut in the
Winkelman, of Dallas. Ages 3 to 7, free middle, the Noom for the number six
breaks into a pair of threes. Kids’ minds
blown. Ages 4 to 8, $8
4 2P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
Has asthma pushed you into a smaller life?
See what could open up for you with FASENRA.*
Helps prevent asthma attacks, lower daily oral
steroid use, and improve breathing.*
FASENRA is an add-on treatment with only
1 maintenance dose every 8 weeks†
and a convenient pen option.
Learn more at FASENRA ts.com.
FASENRA is an add-on treatment for people 12 and
older with severe eosinophilic asthma. It’s not a rescue
medication or for other eosinophilic conditions.
*Results may vary.
†The rst 3 doses are given on day 1, week 4, and week 8.
IMPORTANT SAFETY INFORMATION • are breastfeeding or plan to breastfeed. It is not known if FASENRA
passes into your breast milk. Talk to your healthcare provider about
Do not use FASENRA if you are allergic to benralizumab or any of the the best way to feed your baby if you use FASENRA.
ingredients in FASENRA.
Do not use to treat sudden breathing problems. • are taking prescription and over-the-counter medicines,
FASENRA may cause serious side e ects, including: vitamins, or herbal supplements.
• allergic (hypersensitivity) reactions, including anaphylaxis. Do not stop taking your other asthma medicines unless instructed to do so
Serious allergic reactions can happen after you get your FASENRA by your healthcare provider.
injection. Allergic reactions can sometimes happen hours or The most common side e ects of FASENRA include: headache and sore
days after you get your injection. Tell your healthcare provider or throat. These are not all the possible side e ects of FASENRA.
get emergency help right away if you have any of the following
symptoms of an allergic reaction: APPROVED USE
o swelling of your face, mouth and tongue FASENRA is a prescription medicine used with other asthma medicines for
o breathing problems the maintenance treatment of asthma in people 12 years and older whose
o fainting, dizziness, feeling lightheaded (low blood pressure) asthma is not controlled with their current asthma medicines. FASENRA
o rash helps prevent severe asthma attacks (exacerbations) and may improve
o hives your breathing. Medicines such as FASENRA reduce blood eosinophils.
Eosinophils are a type of white blood cell that may contribute to your asthma.
Before using FASENRA, tell your healthcare provider about all of your FASENRA is not used to treat other problems caused by eosinophils and is
medical conditions, including if you: not used to treat sudden breathing problems. Tell your healthcare provider
if your asthma does not get better or if it gets worse after you start
• are taking oral or inhaled corticosteroid medicines. Do not stop treatment with FASENRA.
taking your corticosteroid medicines unless instructed by your It is not known if FASENRA is safe and effective in children under
healthcare provider. This may cause other symptoms that were 12 years of age.
controlled by the corticosteroid medicine to come back. You are encouraged to report negative side e ects of prescription drugs
to the FDA. Visit www.FDA.gov/medwatch or call 1-800-FDA-1088.
• have a parasitic (helminth) infection.
• are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if FASENRA Please see Brief Summary of full Prescribing Information on
following page.
will harm your unborn baby. Tell your healthcare provider if you
become pregnant during your treatment with FASENRA. FASENRA is a registered trademark of the AstraZeneca group of companies.
©2020 AstraZeneca. All rights reserved. US-42948 7/20
o There is a pregnancy exposure registry that monitors pregnancy
outcomes in women exposed to FASENRA during pregnancy.
Healthcare providers can enroll patients or encourage patients
to enroll themselves by calling 1-877-311-8972 or visiting
www.mothertobaby.org/fasenra.
IMPORTANT INFORMATION ABOUT FASENRA
Read this brief summary carefully before using FASENRA for the first • If your healthcare provider decides that you or a caregiver can give
time and each time you use a new dose. There may be new information. the injection of FASENRA, you or your caregiver should receive
This summary does not take the place of talking to your healthcare training on the right way to prepare and give the injection using the
provider about your medical condition or treatment. FASENRA PEN. Do not try to inject FASENRA until you have been
shown the right way by your healthcare provider. See the detailed
What is FASENRA? “Instructions for Use” that comes with FASENRA PEN for
FASENRA is a prescription medicine used with other asthma medicines information on how to prepare and inject FASENRA.
for the maintenance treatment of asthma in people 12 years and older
whose asthma is not controlled with their current asthma medicines. • If you miss a dose of FASENRA, call your healthcare provider.
When added to other medicines for asthma, FASENRA helps prevent
severe asthma attacks (exacerbations) and may improve your breathing. What are the possible side effects of FASENRA?
Medicines such as FASENRA reduce blood eosinophils. Eosinophils are
a type of white blood cell that may contribute to your asthma. FASENRA may cause serious side effects, including:
• FASENRA is not used to treat other problems caused by eosinophils.
• FASENRA is not used to treat sudden breathing problems. Tell your • allergic (hypersensitivity) reactions, including anaphylaxis.
Serious allergic reactions can happen after you get your FASENRA
healthcare provider if your asthma does not get better or if it gets injection. Allergic reactions can sometimes happen hours or days
worse after you start treatment with FASENRA. after you get your injection. Tell your healthcare provider or get
emergency help right away if you have any of the following symptoms
It is not known if FASENRA is safe and effective in children under of an allergic reaction:
12 years of age. ° swelling of your face, mouth and tongue
° breathing problems
Do not use FASENRA if you are allergic to benralizumab or any of ° fainting, dizziness, feeling lightheaded (low blood pressure)
the ingredients in FASENRA. ° rash
° hives
Before using FASENRA, tell your healthcare provider about The most common side effects of FASENRA
all of your medical conditions, including if you: include headache and sore throat.
• are taking oral or inhaled corticosteroid medicines. Do not stop These are not all the possible side effects of FASENRA.
taking your corticosteroid medicines unless instructed by your Call your doctor for medical advice about side effects.
healthcare provider. This may cause other symptoms that were You may report side effects to FDA at 1-800-FDA-1088.
controlled by the corticosteroid medicine to come back
How should I store FASENRA?
• have a parasitic (helminth) infection • Store FASENRA in the refrigerator between 36°F to 46°F (2°C to 8°C).
• FASENRA may be stored at room temperature between 68°F to 77°F
• are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if FASENRA
will harm your unborn baby. Tell your healthcare provider if you (20°C to 25°C) for up to 14 days.
become pregnant during your treatment with FASENRA. • Once removed from the refrigerator and brought to room temperature
° There is a pregnancy exposure registry that monitors pregnancy FASENRA must be used within 14 days or thrown away.
outcomes in women exposed to FASENRA during pregnancy. • Store FASENRA in the original carton until you are ready to use it to protect
Healthcare providers can enroll patients or encourage patients
to enroll themselves by calling 1-877-311-8972 or visiting it from light.
www.mothertobaby.org/fasenra. • Do not freeze FASENRA. Do not use FASENRA that has been frozen.
• Do not expose FASENRA to heat.
• are breastfeeding or plan to breastfeed. It is not known if FASENRA • Do not use FASENRA past the expiration date.
passes into your breast milk. You and your healthcare provider • Keep FASENRA and all medicines out of the reach of children.
should decide if you will use FASENRA and breastfeed. Talk to
your healthcare provider about the best way to feed your baby if What are the ingredients in FASENRA?
you use FASENRA. Active ingredient: benralizumab
Inactive ingredients: L-histidine, L-histidine hydrochloride
Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you monohydrate, polysorbate 20, ,-trehalose dihydrate, and Water
take, including prescription and over-the-counter medicines, vitamins, for Injection
and herbal supplements. The information provided here is not comprehensive.
Ask your healthcare provider for additional information about
Do not stop taking your other asthma medicines unless your FASENRA. You can also contact the company that makes FASENRA
healthcare provider tells you to. (toll-free) at 1-800-236-9933 or at www.fasenra.com.
How will I use FASENRA? FASENRA is a registered trademark and FASENRA Pen is a trademark
of the AstraZeneca group of companies.
• FASENRA is injected under your skin (subcutaneously) one time © 2019 AstraZeneca LP. All rights reserved.
every 4 weeks for the first 3 doses, and then every 8 weeks. Manufactured for: AstraZeneca LP, Wilmington, DE 19850
• FASENRA comes in a single dose prefilled syringe and in a single 11/19 US-30267
dose autoinjector.
• A healthcare provider will inject FASENRA using the single-dose
prefilled syringe.
For more information, visit FASENRA.com
Or call 1-800-236-9933
K I D S ÑTe c h
How We Picked Ages 5+, free, available only from the 5-year-old learned all the shapes and
the Winners Google Play store locations of all the states using this app,”
says Mike Dawson, a dad of three in State
Teachers and screen-time BEST FOR SPELLING College, Pennsylvania. “The other day,
experts helped us draft I showed him a particular tortilla chip
Montessori Crosswords for Kids and asked him which state it looked like.
the criteria below that apps had He nailed it with his response: Alabama.”
to meet to be considered. For Using picture clues and Ages 4+, $3
every winner we found, we phonics sounds, our testers
moved around letters to BEST ATLAS
ruled out at least five others based spell short words like jog and
on kid testing and parent dog. At higher levels, kids Barefoot World Atlas
do crosswords with longer fill-ins (think
feedback. Borrow these bullet turkey). Kids can even focus on certain It’s so much more than
points to decide whether any kids’ types of words, like those with a silent e a map. Kids zoom across a
or a long i. Ages 4 to 8, $3, available from 3-D globe, playing games
app is worth downloading. the App Store; Google Play and Amazon such as dropping world
versions in the works flags on the correct country.
AD-FREE A University of “We’ve had this app for two years, and it
Michigan study of 135 apps for BEST FOR STORYTIME still holds my 6-year-old son’s interest,”
children ages 5 and under says Katie Caruso, a teacher in Vacaville,
found that 95 percent of them Audible California. “Our family likes that it contains
contained advertising. historical elements, such as the location
Let the pros take care of doing of the Titanic, as well as landmarks and
LIMITED OR NO IN-APP the voices for kids’ books. This cultural facts.” Ages 4+, $5, available only
PURCHASES While we preferred app offers exclusive collabs, from the App Store
free apps or those with a small, like Meryl Streep voicing The
one-time fee, a few of our Velveteen Rabbit and Scarlett BEST FOR PRESIDENTIAL TRIVIA
winners merited the monthly Johansson performing Alice’s Adventures in
membership to buy once the Wonderland. Now you can sit back and listen Presidents vs. Aliens
app was downloaded. We nixed together. All ages, plans start at $8 monthly
options that offered in-app In this high-stakes election
purchases for power-ups, new BEST FOR E-BOOKS year, we can’t think of a better
characters, and the like. time for kids to learn about
Epic! government. After choosing
CLEAR LEARNING GOALS one of 45 presidential avatars,
Many of our picks were Your bookworm will never run kids answer multiple-choice trivia
developed with education experts out of material. More than questions about nicknames, important
and approach the subject matter 40,000 options—from popular dates, quotes, and events. For each correct
from different angles. series like Diary of a Wimpy Kid response, they receive a president to fling
and Big Nate to Newbery Medal at an alien. Ha! When all the aliens are
FUN FACTOR “Often with winners such as Hello, Universe—are smartly off the screen, kids advance to the next
learning apps, it’s like putting organized by age, genre, and even passion. level. “My 6-year-old loved the questions
chocolate on broccoli. Kids won’t There are also sections on dinosaurs and that asked to match the names of the
be fooled,” says Gary Brubaker, comics (shriek!). And the app logs reading presidents to their photos,” says Janelle
director of the graduate program time. Ages 2 to 12, $10 per month after Knight, a mom of two in Santa Rosa Beach,
in game development at one-month trial, not available from Amazon Florida. “She also found it super-fun to
Southern Methodist University, collect the presidents after correctly
in Dallas. We tested our short BEST FOR CREATIVE WRITING answering a certain number of questions.
list with kids to make sure the I learned right along with her.” Ages 6+, $2
games were fun to play over and Write About This
over again. Science
Hundreds of writing prompts,
REPRESENTATION We looked in categories ranging from food BEST FOR BEGINNING CODERS
for apps that offered diversity in to feelings, give kids inspo.
stories and characters. Our testers wrote about fave ScratchJr
artwork, what they’d like to do
GAMES KIDS CAN’T EASILY upside down, and who makes the best pizza. You’ll probably have to help
PLAY IRL “You don’t want Older kids typed out their response on your kid read through the
the main activity to be something the virtual loose-leaf paper while younger instructions at first, but
like dropping and dragging ones recorded it. Ages 7+, $4, iPad only soon they’ll get the hang of
blocks in a pile with no other dragging and dropping
objective,” says Christine Social Studies pieces of programming script. “The app’s
Elgersma, of Common Sense open-ended nature allows kids to create
Media. “Kids don’t need a BEST FOR U.S. GEOGRAPHY their own animated story,” says Monica
screen for that.” Cardella, Ph.D., a program director with
Stack the States the National Science Foundation and
director of the INSPIRE Research Institute
Kids answer multiple-choice for Pre-College Engineering at Purdue
questions about capitals, University, in West Lafayette, Indiana.
flags, and other trivia, earning Ages 5 to 7, free, tablets only
states they can pile on top of
one another like Jenga pieces.
“During quarantine, my soon-to-be
4 5P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020
K I D S ÑTe c h
Music
BEST MUSICAL BASICS
Mazaam
More than a dozen games
teach preschoolers through
first-graders (a time when
their ears are easiest to train)
about musical concepts such
as pitch, tempo, and harmony, using
140 classical pieces. If you wind up with
the next Ben Platt, we expect a concert
ticket. Ages 4 to 6, free to try, $7 for
full version, not available from Amazon
BEST INTRO TO INSTRUMENTS
Melody Jams
Kids choose monster
characters, each playing a
different instrument, to rock
out with in a garage band,
during a big show, or at
the Mars Disco. Our testers loved adding
their own piano, drum, and xylophone
sounds to the mix. Ages 3 to 6, $2, only
for Apple devices
BEST INTRO TO SCIENCE BEST INTRO TO SPACE Making Peace With PRISCILLA GRAGG.
Minecraft
PBS Kids Play and Learn Science What’s in Space?
While the Minecraft app didn’t
Know how your kid gravitates With activities for a range of meet our criteria (too bad about
to the water-play area at your ages, this is an app that
local children’s museum? siblings can share. Toddlers those in-app purchases),
Here’s a virtual, germ-free can build rockets and dress kids obviously love it. Southern
version of those experiments. astronauts, while older kids
Preschoolers can play games that explore can connect the dots to form constellations Methodist University’s Gary
what happens to water when it flows over and see how the sky changes between the Brubaker offers some ways to
and through objects of different shapes and northern and the southern hemisphere.
sizes. Our testers also love the game that Ages 4 to 10, $3, not available from Amazon ramp up the learning.
lets them predict whether objects sink or
float in the water. Ages 2 to 8, free BEST FOR NATURE WALKS BROADEN THEIR VIEW OF
ARCHITECTURE.
BEST INTRO TO ANIMALS Seek by iNaturalist “My son likes to build castles
in Minecraft,” he says. “They
Peekaboo Barn Imagine Pokémon Go all looked like medieval castles
for plants. This app offers until I showed him pictures
Toddlers learn the names of badge-earning nature of Japanese temples and Frank
animals and the sounds they challenges you can complete Lloyd Wright’s buildings.”
make as they pop in and out of as a family. It will also I.D.
a barn. “My 18-month-old gets pictures of unfamiliar flowers, leaves, USE IT FOR A SCHOOL
excited to press the door bugs, or birds. So when your kid asks you PROJECT. Instead of writing
and reveal a new animal,” says Caitlin what something is, take a snap and let a paper on the Alamo, Brubaker’s
Ultimo-Pereyra, of New York City. “Overall, the app figure it out. The app will even tell sixth-grader opted to build it in
the graphics are cute and the sounds you facts about your find and whether Minecraft and annotate where
aren’t irritating, as is the case with some other people have noticed it in your area. each event happened. “He could
apps.” Ages 1 to 3, $2 Ages 4+, free, not available from Amazon have written the paper in a
couple of hours, but he spent a
week and a half working on the
Minecraft version,” Brubaker says.
4 6P A R E N T S NOVEMBER 2020