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Published by tasch, 2018-12-20 06:53:55

Khuluma January 2019

Keywords: Khuluma,Khuluma magazine,Khuluma online magazine,travel magazine,kulula,kulula magazine

PICASSO HEADLINE take me home please January 2019

And now?
with Tsitsi Chiumya
FOR THE MENU see pages 4 & 5


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S ome things are perhaps best left in the past, never to be resurrected. I grew up with
Magnum P.I. being a macho dude with a big moustache, so was horrified to discover
that he has returned as a manicured metrosexual who most likely drinks flavoured beer,
drives a Prius and uses firelighters. 

On the other hand, Harrison Ford returned after 35 years in the 2017 remake of
the brilliant 1982 movie Blade Runner, which was enough to keep the new version
watchable. Just don’t bring back Arnie as Conan the Octogenarian Barbarian – even if
we no longer need subtitles to understand his English. 

So the message is that it is better to ride off into the sunset while your wagon has four
wheels and some horses, than to be dragged off the set by an emaciated, flea-infested,
three-legged donkey. 

With that sad image in mind, I am handing over the reins of Comair’s
airline division to Wrenelle Stander who has extensive experience in
aviation as well as eight years on our board of directors, and is the ideal
candidate to bring kulula back to the future.

Erik Venter, CEO: Comair Ltd JANUARY 2019 3



17 29 JANUARY 2019


Our CEO says even Arnie knows when This South African movie could win an Our cover star sees the future
to move on. Oscar. Here’s why you should watch it in everything.
even if it doesn’t.
Tsitsi Chiumya wants to do stand-up 35 THE WONDER BOYS For seekers of lesser-known
in space and go back in time to save Meet music makers Morrison parks.
the dinosaurs. and Morbee.
Experience 41 HAPPY HOURS If you’re going to conquer
Food and drink aren’t all that’s that bucket list, you’ve
23 TRIPWORTHY on the menu at these gorgeous got to start somewhere.
Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s a flock Jozi bars.
of kiteboarders. 79 HEARTLAND
45 AND NOW, TO BED Though the soundtrack
25 ON OUR RADAR Because tomorrow is another day. may change, road trips never
If you don’t like Shakespeare in the park, get old.
there’s always heavy metal in the dark,
or champers with horses or comedians Explore 88 THE SHAPE OF WATER
who will make you balk. Or you could sing KwaZulu-Natal’s the place to get wet
along to ABBA, swim with your shoes on, this summer.
or see the man who invented Roxy Music.
Because it’s a new year, another day, and 53 BACK IN THE DAY
anything is possible…
A book that puts 88 99 FIND YOUR HAPPY PLACE
history and Imagine writing a book about the
conservation good things in life. Someone did,
and it’s brilliant.
into perspective.

10 JANUARY 2019




Catch an art show dedicated
to rhinos.

Broadcast yourself and chill.

Hair of the dog? Ice bath?
Maybe a light whipping with
birch leaves in a Russian sauna?

These robots won’t take your jobs or
help you drive your car.

A future controlled by algorithms?
Prepare yourself for an AI takeover.

Can someone please explain why my
car still doesn’t fly?

Who needs friends when you can
go shopping?

Mindfulness over management (and
other ways of being a better boss).

Africa is on the rise.

163 SMART ART 151
When the wall’s your canvas,
you paint big puppies.

12 JANUARY 2019

Editor Keith Bain
Content Manager Raina Julies – [email protected]
Content Co-ordinator Vanessa Payne
Copy Editor Nicci Collier

Head of Design Studio Jayne Macé-Ferguson
Senior Designers Mfundo Archie Ndzo, Lesley-Ann van Schalkwyk

Production Editor Shamiela Brenner
Cover Photographer and retouching Sven Kristian

Makeup Artist Tremayne West

Project Manager Richard White
khlassifieds Project Manager Steve Norval
Sales Consultants Stephen Crawford, Jay Deary, Bonnie Eksteen,
Randall Grace, Nazeem Hoosen, Nikita Moore, Gavin Payne,
Andre Potgieter, Alex Rompelmen, Roman Ross, Clint Smith, Zelda Stein
Advertising Co-ordinators Johan Labuschagne, Peace Guga (Intern)

Paarl Media Gauteng

Business Manager Lodewyk van der Walt – [email protected]

Senior Bookkeeper Deidre Musha
General Manager, Magazines Jocelyne Bayer

CEO Comair Limited Erik Venter
Executive Director - Airline Division Comair Limited Wrenelle Stander
Head of Marketing, Loyalty and Customer Experience, Shaun Pozyn
Marketing Manager, Bridgette Ramuluvhana
Brand Communications Manager, Luane Lavery

1 Marignane Drive, Bonaero Park, Kempton Park, 1619
Tel: 011 921 0111 | contact centre: 0861 KULULA (585852)

To advertise in this magazine, please contact
Richard White (Sales Project Manager) at +27 21 469 2542

or email [email protected]
To advertise in the khlassifieds section, please contact
Steve Norval (khlassifieds Project Manager) at +27 21 469 2435

or email [email protected]

Copyright: No portion of this magazine may be reproduced in any form without written consent of the
publisher. The publisher is not responsible for unsolicited material. khuluma is published monthly by
Picasso Headline. The opinions expressed are not necessarily those of Picasso Headline, kulula or the Tiso
Blackstar Group. All advertisements/advertorials and promotions have been paid for and therefore do not
carry any endorsement by the publisher. While every effort has been made to ensure the accuracy of its
contents, neither kulula, nor the publisher can be held responsible for any omissions or errors, or for any
misfortune, injury or damages that may arise therefrom. We reserve the right to edit interviews for

layout purposes.



I f I could travel into the future, I’d aim for around
2200 – by then, flights into space will be safe
and affordable and I’ll achieve my ultimate goal
of doing comedy in space.
If I could travel back in time, I’d arrive just before

dinosaurs went extinct and figure out how to save

them from being wiped out. I know it’s a bit weird, but I dig

dinosaurs and I’m fascinated by prehistoric times – and how

people lived back in the day. So, yes, I’d like to save at least a

few dinosaur species. Probably only the herbivores – and the

smaller, non-threatening ones.

I know what it’s like to be a small fish in a big pond. I was

born in a small rural Limpopo town and when I moved to

Joburg, I felt like my world was tiny compared to everyone

else’s. I only learned to speak English when I was 14 and

was forced to catch up quickly after moving to the city. But I

did manage, I guess.

Last year was so humbling. Live shows, gigs on TV, a Savanna Comics’

Choice Award, and performing overseas… I never imagined achieving

even half of what I have. Which is why I’m very optimistic about

2019. I’m doing my first one-man show – So Naïve – and it’s Tsitsi Chiumya was the rst black

going to be televised. I have this crazy dream, based on video game designer to graduate from

my love of 50 Cent. I listened to him a lot growing up Wits; he changed tracks to pursue comedy

and am a huge fan. His first album Get Rich or Die thanks to insistent prodding from a friend. He

Interview: Keith Bain, Picture: Sven Kristian Tryin’ sold 12 million copies in its first year – the won the Savanna Comics’ Choice Newcomer of the
biggest debut in hip-hop history. So I have this Year Award last year and has been gigging extensively
dream that when I release my first one-man show,
I’m going to better 50 Cent and sell 15 million units – on page 54 you can read about his experiences in
of that DVD. That’s my ultimate dream. It’s a silly Singapore and ailand where he performed late
dream, but the future is filled with potential and last year. Look out for his rst solo show, So Naïve,
nothing is impossible. Except maybe going back in
time, which is why we need to focus on the here and debuting this year – in the meantime, catch
now, and make the best of what we’ve got. So we don’t him live at the upcoming Johannesburg
International Comedy Festival.

end up like the dinosaurs. 14–17 March, JANUARY 2019 17


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Durban-based Saint&Summer have launched a round-toe, lace-up, wedge
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And they’re designed to provide your feet with extra cushioning. We have
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Saint&Summer is headquartered.

Win tickets to see Lauryn Hill in Jozi

Lauryn Hill, whose solo album won her ve Grammy Awards and who rose to fame
as part of The Fugees, will perform at Joburg’s Ticketpro Dome on 2 February.
The show is part of her The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill 20th Anniversary Tour. We
have 10 tickets up for grabs. For a chance to win, visit, hit
the competitions tab and tell us the name of her debut solo album.


Win a book designed to break Win watches for him and her
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Win with Heart

Four x double tickets up for grabs to The Heart Cape Town Music Festival – a family-friendly
event – on 9 February, 2019 when the Newlands Cricket Stadium will throb with the beats
and music of a stellar line-up of local artists, including Jimmy Nevis, Dr Victor and the Rasta
Rebels, Emo Adams, Freshly Ground and Shekhinah, among many others. For a chance
to win the set, visit, hit the competitions tab and ll in your details.



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If you are looking for a holiday in a great
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Keep a lookout on our #kulula social
pages for travel tips, competitions
and great offers!

20 MAY 2018


Bird? Plane?

Neither, obviously. It’s one of the world’s top big air kiteboarders who made the
cut for last year’s Red Bull King of the Air which happens again this month
at Kite Beach in Blouberg, Cape Town. Last year’s competition was won by
Dutchman Kevin Langeree who returns to face the brunt of the Cape’s summer
winds, along with former champions Jesse Richman and Aaron Hadlow, and
heavyweight kiters Liam Whaley, Lewis Crathern, Steven Akkersdijk, Lasse

Walker, Sam Light and Gijs Wassenaar. These nine top-ranking extreme
kiteboarders will be joined by nine wildcard entrants selected for a spot on
the competition roster by way of videos showing off their biggest and highest
aerial manoeuvres. For the rest of us, a spot on the beach – gazing up as the
champions take to the sky – should be enough to get the adrenaline pumping.
The competition window is from 26 January until 10 February, but precise

dates are wind-dependant.

Words: Keith Bain Picture: Tyrone Bradley/Red Bull Content PoolgetTRIPWORTHY

tout & abou JANUARY 2019 23


Get out & about 4

1 Last year, Cape Town’s annual nationwide on 25 January. It’s a comedy 6 5
Shakespeare in the Park summertime soiree about drama – all the drama, in fact – that
was transformed into the Maynardville goes down during family gatherings. In this 7
Open-Air Theatre Festival. Part of the case, it’s a funeral during which the deceased
expanded programme is Jesters in the Park, man’s grown-up children must share their
a mini-season of comedy hosted by Rob van childhood home along with assorted
Vuuren, seen here berating a mob of southern partners and children in tow – and survive.
suburbs troublemakers. Rob is back from
31 January until 2 February with more 5 Making a name for themselves with
comedians in tow, and then on 6 February, their quality lyrics and a sound that’s unique
actor/comedian Alan Committie will take and rich, Spoegwolf will be bringing their
over the stage in the title role in Richard III. alternative Afrikaans beats to bear on the annual Overhex Summer Picnic Concert
at the Overhex Winery & Bistro in Worcester
2 Since the release of his first record with on 26 January. 023 347 5012, functions@
Roxy Music in 1972, Bryan Ferry has sold
over 30 million albums and is a household
name even among millennials who’ve never 6 The Royal Shakespeare Company has
heard his music. His World Tour touches given The Merry Wives of Windsor a very
down in Cape Town at the Grand Arena, merry Essex makeover, setting the comedic
GrandWest, on 14 February, and at the ribald in suburbia along with all its domestic
Sun Arena, Time Square, Tshwane on silliness, gossiping wives and inflated egos.
16 February. Screening at the Fugard Bioscope on
27 January, the Bard’s delightful comedy is
3 That look of imminent destruction – part of an ongoing season of National
plus the requisite all-black attire – is merely Theatre Live screenings of theatre, opera
a calling card for the kind of hard progressive and ballet filmed on UK stages. Also in store
rock that London-based Temples on Mars are The Madness of George III (6 January),
will be treating their fans to while modelling Julie (13 January), the Bolshoi Ballet’s La
their black T-shirt couture at Mercury Live, Sylphide (20 January) and Comédie-
Cape Town on 25 January; at Pool City in PE Française’s The Misanthrope (3 February).
on 26 January; at Arcade Empire in Tshwane
on 1 February; and at Rumours in Joburg on
2 February. 7 British musician, producer and DJ
Simon Green – better known to the world as
4 Hotties Jonathan Boynton-Lee and Bonobo – has risen meteorically to become
Leeanda Reddy star in 3 Days to Go, a new one of the biggest electronic artists of our
South African fliek opening at cinemas time. While his albums have earned JANUARY 2019 25


9 8 considerable acclaim (and Grammy return to Emperors Palace in Joburg with
12 10 nominations), his live acts are known to be The ABBA Show , their world-touring
11 stupendous. You can see the show in Cape tribute to Sweden’s best-loved music act.
13 Town at Kirstenbosch Botanical Gardens on Relive the best of the 1970s and the sad
14 8 February, or in Joburg’s Fox Junction break-ups of the 1980s and sing along
the following day., to your favourite tunes. 18 January– 10 February,

8 Not for the thin-skinned, easily-offended, 12 Africa’s richest race day, The Sun Met Words: Keith Bain, Pictures: Henry Engelbrecht, Neil Krug, Art Streiber, Marcus Maschwitz, Caleb Bjergfelt
narrow-minded or censorial, unhinged will be luring celebs and socialites and party
Australian stand-up comedian, political divas to dress up, air-kiss and play the field on
commentator, actor, and writer Jim 26 January when Kenilworth Racecourse in
Jefferies will be performing his touring show Cape Town becomes the stage for one of the
The Night Talker at GrandWest in Cape year’s most covetable gatherings. With G.H.
Town on 20 February. Mumm bubbly flowing freely and fashionistas
dressing up to the ‘Precious Metals’ theme,
9 Forget everything you know about your there’ll be entertainment galore and plenty of
favourite fairy tales. Into the Woods is opportunities to win, lose and simply hold
a slightly dark Stephen Sondheim musical thumbs – for a stake in the game, Sunbet is
that throws a handful of beloved Brothers the day’s official betting partner.
Grimm characters together for a mix of
amusing and sublime adventures that unfold 13 If you thought the Swiss specialised
when their paths cross after they go, well, into solely in watches and cheese, banking
the woods. Theatre On the Bay, Cape Town, and skiing, it’ll come as a surprise to
30 January–2 March, know that the landlocked Alpine nation
also produced melodic metalcore band,
10 The Steezies are among the numerous Dreamshade. Anything but neutral, their
cool acts enlisted to keep the soaked masses mastery of the hardcore modern metal
in a breezy mood at Up the Creek this year. rock scene has made them highly sought
They’re on the bill along with Black Cat after. They’re touring South Africa next
Bones, Femi Koya, Grassy Spark, Gerald Clark, month, performing in Cape Town, PE,
Stoker, Jackal and the Wind, Crosscurrent, Tshwane and Joburg from 13 to
Lo-ghost, Stone Jets, Koos Kombuis, and 16 February.
many more. With lilos and floaty things galore
on the Breede River and unbridled fun 14 Slip on your yellow vest and keep your
happening on the riverbank and at various takkies on for the swim – the Torpedo
stages, this water-fuelled festival near SwimRun doesn’t bother with costume
Swellendam remains one of South Africa’s changes nor other technical complications
best. 7–10 February, that can get in the way of a good sprint. While
it’s go, go, go all the way, the new 10km race
11 Calling all Dancing Queens, Super at Val de Vie in Franschhoek on 3 February is
Troupers, and anyone named Fernando… actually mostly about the jol. For many, the
They’re back! Not exactly Agnetha, Frida, most competitive part of the race will be
Björn and Benny, but ABBA sing-alikes, looking good in a fashion-forward combination
Hannah Pocock, Jenna Ball, Brent of yellow vest, lycra shorts and a swimming
McMullen and Zac Coombs who this month cap.

26 JANUARY 2019


ConTHE tender
Keith Bain saddles up for
the cinematic joyride that is
South Africa’s bid for an
Oscar nomination JANUARY 2019 29


Ezra Mabengeza
(this picture) stars as the
sheep rustler, John Kepe;
director Jahmil X.T. Qubeka in
a reflective mood (right); singer
Bok van Blerk (in the sidecar,
below) plays a journalist

who follows the
Kepe trial.

Nominations for the 91st
Academy Awards will be
announced on 22 January 2019. If
Sew the Winter to My Skin makes it onto
the list of Best Foreign Language Film
nominees, South Africa will be holding
its breath for Jahmil X.T. Qubeka and
his crew when they attend the Oscars
ceremony on 24 February. The
movie will be released in local

cinemas next month.

I t’s not the kind of movie you’d pick serious campaigning in Hollywood, getting
for a first date. Although it does have the film noticed – and watched – by those
a few sweet romantic interludes and who get to vote. There can be as many
there’s more than enough heartbreaking contenders as there are countries where
stuff to keep you reaching for your hankie, non-English films are made.
Jahmil X.T. Qukeba’s latest film is more
likely to kick you in the guts – hard – than To be very frank, though, whether or
put you in the mood for love. not the film earns enough publicity and
attention to score a nomination, it is a film
The film is Sew the Winter to My Skin South Africans should make an effort to
and it’s South Africa’s official Oscar entry, see. And you should try to see it on a big
meaning it gets to compete for a spot screen where you can really be swept away
on the shortlist of nominees in the Best by the bold mix of audacious cinematic
Foreign Language Film category. It’s style and unorthodox storytelling.
a tough category to crack – South Africa’s Qubeka’s film is breathtaking in its scope
made it twice before, with Yesterday and and in many ways, it’s groundbreaking.
then, the following year, with Tsotsi, which Although sometimes it verges on
became the first and only South African experimental and doesn’t shy away from
film to have won that Academy Award. challenging the viewer, it’s pretty action-
Making it onto the final list involves some packed and tells an incredible story.

30 JANUARY 2019


The film is also adventuresome – an exploration of the human condition, EMOTIONAL
a kind of man-on-the-run Western set in illuminating the light and dark parts of its ROLLERCOASTERS
the early-1950s. It’s based on a real-life hero and its villains.
Robin Hood-like sheep rustler named Jahmil X.T. Qubeka doesn’t make
John Kepe, marvellously played by Ezra Kepe, who proclaimed himself plodding lms. His desire is to
Mabengeza. Kepe has some heady run-ins ‘Samson of the Boschberg’ and took take you on a rollercoaster ride –
with a bunch of racist nationalists who a certain defiant pleasure in provoking emotional ups and downs, thrills
are trying to catch him, but he seems the whites on his trail, is also portrayed and spills, and action that drives the
to get a kick out of evading them as he as a man who loves deeply, who bleeds, story while the characters get under
hides out in the Eastern Cape’s rugged who endures extraordinary hardship in your skin. Like the great lmmakers
Boschberg Mountains. order to survive, and is ultimately put on who’ve inspired him – Hitchcock,
trial and taken to the gallows. The film De Palma and Spielberg – he uses
It has just about everything you could brings us into close quarters with some images to transport you to a di erent
want from a film like this, including incredibly vile characters, too, including dimension, where he can provoke,
chases on horseback and some a black Wyatt Earp-style lawman with a shock and surprise you, and hopefully
exhilarating (and funny) scenes involving profound moustache, a sinister heart and shi something inside the deepest
a sheep. And while it’s packed to the a mean streak so blood-curdling it stays part of you. e rst feature he
rafters with relevant commentary that with you long after the credits roll. directed was A Small Town Called
sheds light on some of the terrible faults Descent in 2010 – it’s a slick crime
in our social system, it’s overwhelmingly Amazingly, most of the film is drama that follows three Scorpion
wordless. Its real language is images agents investigating small-town
xenophobic attacks. He describes his
second movie, Of Good Report, as ‘a
serial killer origin lm.’ Shot in black
and white, it caused a stir in South
Africa by being temporarily banned.
Initially scheduled to open the 34th
Durban International Film Festival,
the screening was replaced by Qubeka
appearing on stage with his mouth
taped in protest. e ban was soon
overturned, but the experience of
being censored le a bitter taste in
the mouth – ironically, the lm was
hailed for its bravery in tackling
poignant issues and for opening a
debate wherever it was screened. It
also earned Qubeka a reputation for
brilliance. In 2017, he made a short
isiXhosa sci- movie, Stillborn, which
premiered at the BRICS Film Festival
in Chengdu, China, and he’s already
got another feature lm awaiting
distribution: it’s called Knuckle City,
and is an epic boxing story. Look out
for it later this year. JANUARY 2019 31


and taut action and nifty cinematic A FILM FOR FILM FANS Pictures: Supplied
reveals – the film forces you to
experience the anguish of a man almost Sew the Winter to My Skin is a movie for people who love movies – made by
always on the verge of being caught. a filmmaker who has movies in his blood. Qubeka, who hails from East London,
There are so many moments when the says he grew up on a diet of Steven Spielberg movies after being bitten by the film bug
cliff-edge suspense compels you to early in life. He says it was his father’s passionate love for movies that got him hooked.
hold your breath – whether because of ‘I adopted his love of films and got into the habit of watching everything I could lay
the relentlessness of a white-knuckle my hands on.’ He says the films he saw had a deep impact on him, and he knew
chase or Kepe’s hair’s-breadth evasion movies so well that he was ‘a walking catalogue of films’.
of capture.
Once Spielberg had really grabbed his attention, Qubeka became aware of the
It’s what Qubeka likes to call a ‘visceral potential power of cinema – and the opportunity to create other worlds. He says he
language’ and it tends to make you developed some kind of Peter Pan fantasy, largely fuelled by the imagined worlds
experience the story physically and that filmmakers like Spielberg created. ‘I never wanted to grow up,’ he says. That
emotionally rather than intellectually. early passion for cinema is probably why his films are so textured and layered.
The film’s telling is smart too. Qubeka While Sew the Winter to My Skin presents an intriguing history, it’s Qubeka’s
is flexible with time and the editing encyclopaedic knowledge of what cinema is capable of that really takes this film to
deftly weaves between past and present another level. Stealthily flitting between tragedy and drama, comedy and parody, the
bringing an almost dreamlike quality to film possesses an operatic quality – captured with lush camerawork, it combines
the unfolding drama. You walk out of the incredible sound and music, and is poetically edited by Layla Swart who, crazily,
cinema feeling like you’ve been on one also produced the film. The resulting whole is evidence of a collective genius,
hell of a journey. deftly guided by a consummate artist.

32 JANUARY 2019




British singer-songwriter James
Morrison and The Parlotones’
lead singer Kahn Morbee open
their hearts to us JANUARY 2019 35

James Morrison has

been startling audiences with

his soulful presence since breaking

onto the scene in 2006; the following

year, he won the BRIT Award for British

Male Solo Artist – he was just 21 years old.

He’s touring South Africa for the first time

JAMES: THE DAYDREAMER this month, performing at Montecasino’s

In ‘Slave to the Music’, on my 2011 I can’t moan Teatro in Joburg on 22 and 23 January, immediate way for
album, The Awakening, I was sort of about my
taking the piss. Music’s the main thing I’ve childhood because and at Kirstenbosch Botanical Gardens me to express myself.
been doing for the last 10 years but I don’t it’s done now – it in Cape Town on 26 January. Then I discovered music
feel like I haven’t got a choice. I love music
and appreciate the fact that I can do it.,
I never take it for granted. I just mean that
I put everything I’ve got into it. and as soon as I started
I’ve always been pretty good at going
off into my own little world. I was wasn’t great but it got playing, it was a case of,
a daydreamer at school. I always had my
head out the window and didn’t really me to where I am today. ‘Well this is a much easier way
concentrate on what was going on. In
some ways, you’re better off doing that So I don’t look back at it negatively. for me to express whatever it is I’m trying
– looking at life from your own unique
point of view rather than simply taking on I suppose the hardships I experienced as to express.’ When I sing, I really feel some
everyone else’s perspective.
a youngster gave me the drive to find the deep connection to my emotions.

thing that makes me truly happy – and to My idols were people like Stevie

pursue it. Wonder and Otis Redding. Musicians

If I look deeply, I’d say the desire to who could sing real good and stop me in

perform probably has something to do my tracks. They inspired me when I was

with the fact that I didn’t get loads of growing up.

attention when I was growing up. And as I reckon I first became aware of music’s

a kid I was never really good at anything power when I listened to Innervisions by

other than drawing. I was really shy and Stevie Wonder. I’d never really heard music

didn’t really talk much – drawing was an like that before – melodies, strange notes

36 JANUARY 2019


with really weird chords that were unlike becoming well-known and keeping my a night out.’ But I’ve been in a long-term
anything I knew. The way he phrased stuff head on my shoulders without losing the relationship so all I can write about is my
just blew me away. The purity of where he plot. And then adding kids into the mix. relationship. And in that sense, I’m kind
was coming from really struck me, too, as I think it’s real life that I need to try to be of stuck in this world – I can’t really write
did his unique phrasing. It was his freedom brave with – not so much my career. about anything else, because that’s the
of melody and the freedom with which Busking on the street as a teenager reality I’m living. So the only way I can keep
he sang that I latched onto. It’s taken taught me a lot. It taught me to just get it fresh is with the lyrics and the melody
me a long time to understand what it is on with it, to do it because I loved it. And and the production.
about his music that I like. And a lot of it it built up my confidence – I needed that The freshness on my latest album has
is to do with the chords, the metre of the because I was shy. It also taught me how a lot to do with not using any production
tunes, the way the beat runs underneath to pull it out of the bag even when people tricks. It’s a simple band in a room – like it
the tunes. Everything I knew about music weren’t listening. It definitely worked would have been in the 1960s or 1970s,
changed the moment I started listening to because by the time I was 15, I was doing with three-part harmonies. It feels like I’m
him. He’s such a complex musician. pub gigs. And I was a confident 15-year- now finally creating music with a really
I nearly died soon after I was born. I was old, smashing it in front of a crowd. classic sound. I’m really excited because
premature and my sister came into the I try to write songs with heart. Songs that’s what I’ve been working towards the
room and gave me whooping cough. That that aren’t so aggressive lyrically. whole time. Trying to write songs that will
complicated everything for me. It’s a really A lot of songs tend be about negative last forever. That have a meaning to them.
bad infection for babies – I coughed so relationships. They sing things like, And that I’m recognisable in my voice.
much I ruptured my vocal cord and it’s got ‘I don’t really need you around!’ or ‘Oh, Those are the three things I’m always
a little bump in it. That’s why when I talk it was a mistake!’ or ‘I just kissed you on trying to get better at.
or sing, it’s husky. It used to do my head in;
I wanted to sound like Stevie Wonder who It feels like I’m now finally
has a really clean voice. I was constantly creating music with a really
wondering, ‘Why can’t I get rid of that classic sound
noise?’ But it is what it is. I got to grips
with it and realised that plenty of other
singers have husky voices and sound good.
So I listened to the singers who had husky
voices – Rod Stewart, Otis Redding, even
Marvin Gaye’s got a bit of husk to his voice.
Actually, it’s useful to have the choice:
I can go really sweet, but I can go really
hard as well. But that husk meant that it
took me a long time to nail the technical
side of singing.
Music’s just music. I try to enjoy the
music part of life and keep that quite
fun – my real life is where I have to try
and be brave really. It’s not like I jump out
of planes every day, but I do feel that I’m
pretty good at dealing with life when it
gets hard. I had a lot of tough times to
get through as a kid. And then there was
the whole business of becoming an artist, JANUARY 2019 37


After opening for
Coldplay in 2011, Kahn
Morbee said it was the first time
The Parlotones had opened for
a group they were really fans of. Last year,
the band celebrated its 20th anniversary
by releasing a new album, China, along
with a handful of breathtaking music
videos. They’re performing at
Kirstenbosch Botanical Gardens
in Cape Town on 13 January.

KAHN: THE STARGAZER Music started as a hobby. It was just this Parlotones was probably Radiohead’s
cool thing to do – a chance to get together The Bends album. And for me Smashing
New Year’s resolutions? I guess the with some mates and play and create Pumpkins’ Mellon Collie and the Infinite
substance behind them is that it’s a new something and get the occasional gig. But Sadness. More than favourite bands,
year, a fresh start, a chance to begin then, even if we thought it was slightly it’s actually specific albums that have
again. But I don’t think you should pin delusional, we started to harbour greater resonated with me. Sometimes you lose
your aspirations to them or delay positive aspirations. Like playing somewhere out of a band for a while. Like when Radiohead
change until a specific time of year comes town, like in Durban. And then trying to get goes a bit weird for a bit – they’re still cool,
along. If the need is immediate then try to on a festival, even if it meant performing but for a while they lose the melody.
put those steps in place now. at midnight to 200 people. But all of these Not to say that there aren’t moments of
I used to be very good at drawing my things, these small little milestones, lead melancholy in the music, but mostly it’s
goals in sketchbooks I’ve kept. Some of up to that bigger thing you’re actually hopeful and a celebration of the fact that
what I put down has materialised. I’ve always going to be reaching for… When you we get to have this human journey. In the
fallen short of some things. I’m still trying do eventually play that one gig in Durban, context of the universe, this is the only life
to get a six pack. But I probably know it you wonder, ‘What about Cape Town? we know of and it’s a massive privilege
will never happen, because I don’t see the Bloem? London?’ It’s that constant, ‘What even if it’s hard, or perceived to be tough.
point. I’m not an athlete or cover model. about?’ question – or ‘What if?’ That’s what I believe, that’s my personal
And a six pack will come only with a big INXS, The Cure and The Smiths were path, and that’s what I write about.
sacrifice to my lifestyle – I love food and the first bands that made me want to be We’ve mostly done music for ourselves
drink and socialising. Is the six weeks of in a band. And while we all had different – and some people come along for the
sacrifice it’d take to get a six pack really tastes, the common denominator for The journey. I know it’s considered commercial,
worth it?

38 JANUARY 2019


but I’ve always believed that the minute I don’t think I could do weird if I tried
you got out of your bedroom or your
Interviews: Keith Bain, Pictures: Andre Badenhorst, Stephen Segal, Supplied garage and onto a stage, you did it with the I think the music industry is like a long seasons of The Voice. Released two solo
intention of appealing to an audience of snake – the body carries on forever but albums, plus a Parlotones album. A lot of
some sort. Whether it’s a niche audience the head of the cobra is getting bigger and stuff happened. And I turned 40. I’m sure
and a little bit weird, or whether you target bigger. The big stars are bigger than ever when anyone reaches 40 these days they
a wide audience, it still has the purpose before. And all the little guys are hustling wonder if the industry they’re in is still
of appealing to an audience. So I don’t see in a very crowded area. going to be relevant – or around – in three
the point of crucifying musicians who’ve Technology’s also flipped the industry years’ time. And, if not, what the hell am
nailed it. model. Previously, artists would lose I going to do?
We’re bigger fans of music than we are money when they toured. Because they’d You can’t really predict the future, but
musicians. I’ve never been in love with the use the tour to create this grandiose show I can tell you that there are going to be
craft. I’ve been in love with the process of that would lose money so they could sell some crappy moments and some great
creating music, but the craft of learning 20 million albums and that’s how they moments… Over a period of time, life is
scales and that sort of thing has never made their money. Now you’re going to always going to look like the stock market.
excited me. lose money on an album because no-one’s That’s life, really. Ups and downs. You’re in
I don’t think I could do weird even if really going to buy it. Instead, you’ll get it. When you reach 80 – if you get to 80 –
I tried. My music would still sound a gazillion streams, and then you tour and you look back and hopefully you’ll be able
melodic. What’s the point of being weird? make your money from live shows. to say, ‘Sjoe! Between 1995 and 1999, it
In ancient times, songs were how people On reflection, the last three years have was a bit crappy for me, but on the whole
told stories and shared memories. Or been massive. I’ve had three kids. Did two it was a jol!’
they’d be used to mourn or celebrate
something. If it’s weird and discordant, it
becomes about something else. If I was
in it for the love of the craft, I might enjoy
doing some kind of weird jazz. But what
I’m in love with is song and the essence
of song. So, regardless of whatever weird
stuff you might be able to put around a
song, the question for me is always: ‘Will it
move you even if it were just the voice and
a guitar?’ I’m not saying it’s the right way,
but that’s our way.
You do need some sort of courage to
take something that you created and put
it out there. There’s always a little bit of
you that gets exposed. But you also get to
hide behind the work. You can always say,
‘Ag, it’s just a song!’ I always say music’s
a form of therapy. Some people talk to
psychologists, I write a song about it. If
something is really bugging me, I can put it
out there and it’s off my chest.
Technology has lowered the barrier to
entry into the music industry, but it also
means it’s a lot more crowded, noisier. JANUARY 2019 39


Joburg’s love of socialising has spawned
a raft of eye-catching joints where drinking
and dining go hand in hand


Amid the buzz of independent bars and
restaurants on Rosebank’s vibrant Park
Corner, A Streetbar Named Desire sports
plush jade-green interiors and a big terrace
overlooking the galleries on Jan Smuts
Avenue. The bar is done out as a homage to
the Tennessee Williams play from which it
takes its tongue-in-cheek name. Cocktails are
king here and also pay tribute to Williams’s
play – The Kindness of Strangers is made
with gin, lime juice, bitters and spiced rhubarb,
and there are all the classics, from negronis
to good old-fashioned old-fashioneds.
Besides mixed drinks, there are satisfying
bar snacks and tapas inspired by Turkish,
Israeli and Lebanese cuisines – tender pork
fillet skewers, chunky Spanish chorizo and
Manchego croquettes, fried artichoke hearts,
and there’s a harissa-marinated sirloin served
with lemon chimichurri that’s blissfully tart. JANUARY 2019 41


MIGHTY MOOTEE inspiration for their creations which
include a milk-tart brandy, sparkling
Africa’s Big Apple is officially home umqombothi, a koeksister negroni,
to one of the best bars on the planet. and an ubuntu punch. Food’s equally
That’s according to the 12th annual lekker: there are delicious gourmet
Spirited Awards held in New Orleans bunny chows; proper pap and vleis
last year. The competition placed (pulled short-rib beef); samp served
Melville’s Mootee Bar among the with ‘calabash relish’… And there’s
world’s 10 best new cocktail bars. koeksister bread-and-butter pudding or
The main drawcard is of course the malva brûlée for afters, so be sure to
menu of mind-bendy cocktails mixed leave some space.
by the innovative owner-bartenders.
They’ve tapped into African stories as

42 JANUARY 2019



Ferreirasdorp in the inner city is where the
first gold digs were established in 1886 –
Joburg literally grew up around it. Today,
the historic neighbourhood is getting a
shot at a revival thanks to 1 Fox Precinct,
an urban-rejuvenation project that’s
seen warehouses transformed into such
wondrous spaces as Mad Giant,
a craft brewery overseen by Eben Uys.
He’s created a range of labour-intensive
beers with names like True Grit (amber
ale), The Guzzler (Pilsner) and Electric
Light (a weiss beer). Plus his Killer Hop
(an American pale ale) was recently
named Grand Champion (overall best
beer) at the 2018/19 African Beer
Awards. The interior of the adjoining
restaurant, Urbanologi, was designed
by Haldane Martin – it’s next-level stuff
featuring furniture inspired by scaled-up
Meccano pieces, and there’s a huge yeti
sculpture alongside graffiti murals by
Justin Nomad.

Words: Keith Bain, Pictures: Micky Hoyle, supplied NATURE’S CHOICE

Chef James Diack’s Parkhurst bistro, JANUARY 2019 43
Coobs, recently reinvigorated its drinks
menu with various cocktails dreamed
up by Jesse Chinn, a mixologist
with alchemy in his genes.
Inspired by the restaurant’s
focus on seasonality and
freshness, the drinks feature
botanical infusions and fresh
herbs. Chinn rates his old-school
Aviation cocktail – made with gin,
maraschino liqueur, crème de violette
and elderflower – as a standout for which
he prepares his own crème de violette
using locally produced candied violets.
Most of the ingredients he uses – including
lemon curd and ginger beer – come
straight from Diack’s family farm in the


to bedAND NOW,
Kruger sleep-outs at a timeless lodge; a game reserve on
Tshwane’s doorstep; and find out which Cape Town address treated

our cover star like royalty


Founded by descendants of Percy FitzPatrick (who penned Jock of the Bushveld)
within Kruger’s first private concession, Jock Safari Lodge is an old heart-stealer that

has always offered a classic bushveld experience with superb guiding and beautiful
accommodations. A recent refurb, though, has taken the atmosphere of timeless
vintage to a whole new level. The 12 rooms are exquisite – each one is actually
a freestanding cottage with outdoor Victorian bath and shower and plunge pool on
a very generously-sized deck overlooking the riverbed. But what we fell most in love
with were these amazing semi-enclosed salas (day bed pavilions) built at the edge of
each deck. They have screen ‘walls’ that can be rolled down at night so you can sleep
outdoors in total luxury. While not quite under the stars, you get the sounds of the
bush – little snuffling creatures and not-too-distant roaring lions – coming through
in thick, thrilling surround sound. They’re also a great spot from which to watch
elephants traipsing through the riverbed as you laze between game drives. Book now

for May and June and score a 10% discount. JANUARY 2019 45



Just past sunrise: imagine watching rhinos, elephants and giraffes play in a water hole metres from your doorstep, as you sip your
morning coffee, thorny trees silhouetted against a pinkening sky. Birds are calling and the smell of dry grass hangs in the air. Later, as the
mercury climbs and the bushveld sun begins to sizzle, retreat to the sparkling pool (pictured), stopping between laps to admire the view
and laze away the afternoon. At night, gather in a lapa around an African bush fire, listening to animal sounds as stars scatter overhead.
This is the lay of the land at Ritsako Game Lodge, with its mix of rooms and self-catering apartments, its main perk being that it’s
situated just 45 kilometres north of Tshwane, or 100 kilometres from OR Tambo International Airport. Speak to the folks who know
Ritsako, and they’ll share their particular enthusiasm for rhinos. The trick, they say, is to be up for the early morning get-together, when
the animals gather at the water hole to drink. ‘At around 5am,’ one Ritsako staffer told us. ‘Sometimes there are up to three rhinos at
a time.’ Ritsako was established a year ago inside the malaria-free Dinokeng Game Reserve, which is said to be Gauteng’s first free-
roaming Big Five reserve next to an urban area. The reserve’s western border flanks the N1 highway. Other animals include wildebeest,
hyenas, jackal, zebras and various antelope. And there are martial eagles that have successfully bred and raised healthy chicks here. The

reserve has self-drive roads so you can take the game-viewing at your own pace. Ritsako also has a restaurant and spa, and hosts
weddings. If your interests lean towards active pursuits, quad biking and canoeing can be arranged too.

46 JANUARY 2019

EXPERIENCE WAKE UP HAPPY ON POINT IN Words: Keith Bain, Biénne Huisman, Pictures: Supplied
48 JANUARY 2019
When our ceaselessly upbeat cover
comedian flew to Cape Town for his
photo shoot, we asked him where
in the city he’d like to sleep over.
‘Sea Point,’ said Tsitsi. ‘Is that
because you’re keeping Kosher?’
we asked. ‘No,’ he said, ‘it’s because
I like to be close to everything –
the sea, the city, the mountain…
and my favourite restaurant.’ What
we didn’t expect was to find Tsitsi
posting love-struck Instagram and
Facebook stories about the hotel
we put him in for the night. No
sooner had he checked into Premier
Hotel Cape Town than we found
a trail of hashtags leading to videos
of his suite. He was still gushing
when he turned up at the studio,
a big grin etched across his face.
‘Up until now, I’ve had good
experiences with hotels, but I’ve
never ever been given the VIP
treatment,’ he said, while Sven, our
photographer begged him to stop
smiling. ‘You don’t understand,’ Tsitsi
insisted, ‘I’ve never stayed in such
a luxurious room. I mean my room
has got its own rooms…’ Later,
he raved to us about the ‘super-
comfortable’ bed and all the
amenities (‘they even have a proper
gym’). But then he said, ‘You know
what I really liked?’ ‘What?’ ‘I was
really overwhelmed by how friendly
everyone was. I felt at home. I could
see the ocean, too, and smell it and
hear the waves. Being there made
me feel like I was on holiday even
though I was working a little bit.’

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