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Published by Aman, 2019-05-30 01:27:03

Life Positive June Magazine

Life Positive

www.lifepositive.com ` 100

YOUR PERSONAL AND SPIRITUAL GROWTH COMPANION June 2019

Identify your Guru gyan by
emotional DADASHREEJI
triggers
PAGE 40
PAGE 26

Heal The ‘real’ secret
transgenerational to weight loss
trauma
PAGE 74
PAGE 64
PSYCHO NEUROBIC
PROGRAMMING
(PNP) - SERIES XI

PAGE 82





June 2019 Vol. 23  Issue 03  Price ` 100 Healing our subconscious

Chairman: Aditya Ahluwalia Dear Reader,
President: D R Kaarthikeyan Life Positive brings you a bouquet of carefully selected, in-depth articles
Director: V Venkat that promise to touch your heart, make you reflect, and bring impending
Editor: Shivi Verma changes to your life in the month of June.
Technology CEO: Aman Chandra The lead story is on emotional triggers and what they reveal to us. All
of us have some soft, touchy spots that flare up on being even slightly
EDITORIAL nudged. Though on the surface it appears that the one instigating is
responsible for our outburst, in reality, they have only pressed the
Senior Correspondent: Annesha Banerjee buttons of our underlying programmes that are based on unfounded
Correspondent: Rashmi Rawat fears and negative self-beliefs. On studying our triggers carefully, we can
Correspondent: Rishi rathod exhume the programmes subconsciously running and affecting our lives
Graphic Designer: Sandeep Kumar and replace them with self-affirming thoughts.
Although it requires courage to go on a self-inventory, the dividends it
MARKETING gets us are undeniable and huge.
The second lead is on transgenerational healing. “We are our own
Assistant Manager, Ad Sales: Santosh Pandey ancestors,” says sister BK Shivani. As we progress on the path of healing
our inner wounds, we come to realise that our pain is not only individual
PRODUCT MARKETING but an accumulation of all the unresolved karmic backlog of our
ancestors. Hence it becomes our sacred responsibility to heal and bring
Manager, Circulation & Subscription: Dharamveer Singh to resolution all that was left unheard and unacknowledged by people of
our previous generations. Through modalities like family constellation,
SUBSCRIPTION the spirits of the deceased are invited, and gently, empathetically, and
lovingly, complicated emotional entanglements are resolved through
Executive: Swetnisha Sharma, Tripti Dubey, forgiveness work. The article softly draws the seeker into the inner circle
Ankita Sharma, Vikash Prasad of healing, where deep work is done and old traumas are released.
Another fascinating article is on relationships and their karmic
FINANCE & ADMINISTRATION implications. Our life is delicately woven in a web of relationships. Though
we are in relationship with each and everything in our surroundings, it is
Deputy General Manager: Ambika Sharma our close relationships that reflect to us our relationship with ourselves.
Executive: Jyoti Khatri Whether good or bad, they all have something to teach us and carry the
code of our freedom from karmic bondage, if we are able to learn the
Advisors
lessons embedded in them.
Parveen Chopra, Suma Varughese, Mark Tully, From this month, we are starting a new column on mudra
Kiran Bedi, M Madhavan Nambiar, SD Saxena,
Ameeta Mehra, Manisha Verma, Shruti Nada Poddar, therapy by Abhay Kumar Shah, and we hope that you will
Hamid Ahmed, Shovana Narayan, Ritika Goyal benefit immensely from his knowledge.

Editorial & Advertising Office Wishing you a soul-satisfying June.

Delhi: F1/9, First floor, Okhla Industrial Area, LP mascot: Laughing Buddha - Editor
Phase - I, New Delhi-110 020
Ph: (011) 49563777 Fax: (011) 49563773
E-mails: [email protected]

U.S. REPRESENTATIVE: Life Positive
P.O. Box 65, Colts Neck, NJ 07722, USA; e-mail: [email protected]

Readers are requested to make appropriate enquiries before
sending money, incurring expenses or entering into commitments in
relation to any advertisement in this publication.
Life Positive or Life Positive Pvt Ltd do not vouch for any claims
made by the advertisers of ­products and services. The printer,
publisher or editor of Life Positive or any employee of Life Positive
Pvt Ltd shall not be held liable for any consequences in the event of
such claims not being honoured by the advertisers.
All rights reserved. © Life Positive Pvt. Ltd.

losZ HkoUrq lqf[ku~%] losZlUrq fujke;k%
losZ Hknzkf.k i’;Urq] ekdf’pn~nq%[kHkkd~Hkosr!

May all beings be happy, May all be healthy,
May people have the well-being of all in mind,
May nobody suffer in any way. — Vedic prayer

Edited by Shivi Verma. Printed and published by
Aditya Ahluwalia on behalf of Life Positive Pvt. Ltd. from
F1/9, First floor, Okhla Industrial Area, Phase - I,
New Delhi-110 020
Printed at M.P. Printers, B-220, Phase 2 Noida, 201305
Member, Indian Newspaper Society

4 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

26

26 LEAD STORY
What triggers reveal

Our emotional triggers are an indicator to a deeper
underlying issue, says Sharmila Bhosale

18 CLOSE ENCOUNTER
Steeped in gratitude  

Manoj Lekhi explains to Rishi Rathod why he
quit his multi-crore business

14 HEARTSPEAK
One lucky Mother!

Kamalini Natesan shares what it is like to bring up
a child with gender dysphoria

42 FOOD
Summer Sustenance

Some cool dietary advice to follow this summer

Cover photo: Adobe Stock, Photo credit: Adobe Stock, Cover design: Sandeep Kumar

06 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

48 EVOLUTION
The threads of karma

Relationships are founded on the bedrock of karma

56 ALCHEMY
64 The world of crystals

Crystals are laden with immense healing and
rejuvenating properties

HEALING
Healing our ancestors

How to heal karmic complications that travel
from one generation to the other

74 MIND MATTERS
Forget ‘weight loss’

How to trick the brain to facilitate weight loss

78 SHARING REGULAR COLUMNS Mudra Column 72
The outcaste Response 08
Mandala 10
An encounter with a hijra left the author Guruspeak 40
dumbfounded with admiration and respect Aha-moments 54
Journey 62
Positive focus 80

Revelations 86

Banyan tree 88

Total pages 92, including the cover page and the back cover

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Contents 07

RESPONSE

www.lifepositive.com ` 100 Mail from our readers,
online fans and subscribers
YOUR PERSONAL AND SPIRITUAL GROWTH COMPANION May 2019

MEET How to
ELITOM: overcome

The man who trauma
lives on breath
alone PAGE 74

PAGE 18

Surrender Guru gyan by EDITOR’S COLUMN, READER’S DELIGHT!
to your DADASHREEJI This is with reference to the Journey column,
inner guide Getting off the pendulum swing, in the May 2019
PAGE 64 issue of Life Positive. While reading it, I felt like it
PAGE 26 was my story being narrated here. It’s only after
PSYCHO NEUROBIC 38 years that I have now actually acquired a bit
PROGRAMMING of control on my ‘mood pendulum.’  Earlier, I used
(PNP) - SERIES X to ride my mood swings. Even today, my mood
pendulum swings, but I am at the centre, simply
PAGE 82 watching it swing. 
 
Letter of the month It’s not that I don’t feel anything. On the contrary,
it’s a challenge to control these moods. How I
GOLDEN EDITION! want to scream at somebody! How I itch to throw
Congratulations to the editor, Shivi tantrums and run away from a situation! Yes, these
Verma, for the priceless April 2019 things still happen—but only in my mind. I don’t let
anniversary issue of Life Positive. I just them happen in real life.  Instead, I excuse myself
finished reading the lead story written by and vent out all my feelings in seclusion. I let the
her, The journey home; and I think it was pendulum swing as hard as it wants to and then
great! Browsing  through the rest of the it happens—the pendulum stops swinging and
pages of the issue, I conclude that this is calms down at the centre. And then I come away
the best issue that has been published in feeling better and lighter.  I realise this exercise
recent times by Life Positive. It is more saves your relationships; you handle yourself,
valuable than gold!   and when you do this, you can handle people or
situations better.
Very few people are blessed by a real  
guru who can lead to the divine light Another important thing, as Shivi mentioned, is to
within;  the rest struggle and fumble on avoid riding other people’s mood pendulums. If
the way, often falling prey to fake god- somebody else is shouting or showing irritation,
men. don’t shout back. Don’t swing with their pendulum! 
Self-attunement is a gift we have forgotten
amidst our busy lives. “Only I didn’t know that the Divine worked in
Thank you, Life Positive, for the guidance. mysterious and unfathomable ways. He breaks
Arun P Talpade via email and demolishes you completely in order to rebuild

08 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

your life.” These lines by Shivi are close to my Everest. Self-realisation is like reaching the
life experience!  top of Mount Everest. There are many who
Thank you, Shivi, for such a wonderful article. have reached base camp or half the distance. 
Shipra Singh, New Delhi What are their experiences?  It will be very
interesting and educative to know what they
SADHANA feel.
The April 2019 issue of Life Positive on Self- A S Dandekar, Mumbai
realisation was extremely good. Many of us
wonder what kind of experience people get SOULFUL SADHGURU
and how they feel when they reach the final In the article Memories of  Mysore, in the
stage of Self-realisation (enlightenment). This April 2019 issue of Life Positive, it was great
issue throws light on it.  to read about Padma Vibhushan Sadhguru Sri
  Jaggi Vasudev’s moments of enlightenment in
However, it seems that the realised ones his own words as he describes his experience
must have done a lot of sadhana in their past on the 23rd of September 1982 at a rock on
lives, which resulted in their present state. In Chamundi Hills, Mysore. It’s true that such
almost all cases, it seems that Self-realisation life-transforming experiences (along with
came as a Big Bang! their time, place, and date) can’t be forgotten.
  Sadhguruji is really an enlightened soul. I
I understand that when earnest seekers have watched him on various TV programmes;
perform sadhana, they get many experiences his simple, jolly, and knowledgeable nature
that are uniquely different and which serve as reflects on his face and in his soul. I wish I
guideposts. These show that they are on the could get a chance to meet him. 
right track and are progressing. Let us say S S Vinayak, Kharagpur, West Bengal
that one is trying to climb the peak of Mount

Response 09

MANDALA Soulful cultivation

CV Prakash dreams of popularising soilless cultivation in India

With the advent of organic and decided to learn the science
farming, suddenly a spurt
can be witnessed in highly of soilless cultivation.
educated people leaving
their cushy jobs and After working and
embracing agriculture.
Because of them, new, learning under his guru,
more efficient and cost-
effective methods of he returned to his
farming are rapidly
entering the agricultural motherland to pioneer
scene both in India and
abroad. CV Prakash, a the concept of soilless
retired Navy personnel
is passionate about making cultivation in 2008.
soilless cultivation, popular in India.
Based in Dharwad, he left the Indian “When plants grow
Navy prematurely in 1997 and started
his own consulting business in Australia. just in water it is called
One day a company that was interested in
importing a soilless medium named cocopeat hydroponics and when
(a multipurpose growing medium made of
coconut husk) from Sri Lanka reached out to they grown in solid medium
him. The company wanted him to find cocopeat
manufacturers in India with whom they like cocopeat it is referred to
could collaborate to meet the demand of its
customers for cocopeat. Presented with an as media culture,” he says.
opportunity that he could not miss; he burnt
the midnight oil to know all about the cocopeat Hydroponics is a method of growing
industry. In 48 hours, he had shortlisted 23
companies who could be prospective joint plants without soil by adding mineral
venture partners. Three weeks later, he was
in India and found not just one, but three nutrient solutions to a water solvent.
excellent partners.
His turning point, however, came when he met His vision is to teach people how to grow their
an Australian company’s chairman and saw
two greenhouses growing flower and vegetable own pesticide free nutritious vegetables and
crops using cocopeat. At that very moment, he
dropped all ideas of being a general consultant herbs, which will eventually lead to a healthy

and happy planet.

His student, Manisha Sebastian from

Bangalore says, “Plants can be taken to their

genetic best thus mitigating the problem of

shrinking agricultural land due to steep rise

in urbanisation. All one needs is sunlight and

clean water. I would recommend people to

do a basic training workshop in simplified

hydroponics and then set up a small garden of

100 to 200 sq ft”.

Hydroponics consumes much lesser water

than traditional agriculture and can designed

to beat the challenge of impending water

shortage.

Says Prakash, “Find your passion, live your

passion. You won’t ever go wrong.”

10 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

When the Manipadma bloomed 

March 23, 2019, saw the birth of the “Manipadma is the only foundation in the
Manipadma Foundation, a corporate world that will remove human suffering from
style organisation that aims to wipe out the root. Humanity is suffering! Despite the
human suffering from the face of the earth. honest efforts of many spiritual and religious
Founded by Manish Paliwal, about three leaders, government organisations and
hundred attendees comprising corporate NGOs, engaged in evolving human life, there
professionals, television producers, is still no peace. The problems of humanity
directors, film actors, astrologers, software are not reducing. In fact, newer problems
engineers, and sports personalities had keep springing up.” said Paliwal.
gathered to celebrate the event at hotel
Orchid, Mumbai. He said that since long society has been
Manish Paliwal, Founder of Manipadma, said, developing solutions to reduce human
“Our main task is to help people find their suffering but most of us don’t get any
life purpose and then support the person to support during traumatic times as we don’t
reach their supreme self. That’s the only way get access to help. “The problems pile up
you can create a happy family, and happy and suffering turns into crisis resulting in
society.” unhappy and unfulfilled individuals who can
never contribute towards the wellbeing of
Darryl D’souza, Co-founder, Manipadma society. Thus, society too suffers as a result,”
Foundation, explained how the foundation he explained.
intended to achieve the stated goal. “To help
individual and society, in general, we are The Manipadma Human Development
coming out with 300 hundred world-class
programmes, out of which only three Foundation aims to be the missing
are paid and the rest are completely
free. No other organisation or solution for all of humanity
foundation is doing this.”
Manish spoke about how for 2500 years to come.
his mother’s suicide due
to depression made him According to the founders,
promise to himself that he
would do something for Manipadma identifies
the suffering humanity. He
added that it took years of problems at their root
contemplation, hard-work
and research before the and resolves them
foundation saw the light of the
day. through preventive

and curative

solutions and

services that are

permanent in nature.

Manish Paliwal (First from left)
aims to eradicate human suffering

from the face of the earth.

Mandala 11

NAET—A pain-free panacea

An allergy can be a source of acute suffering meridians, disrupting the normal flow of
for an individual. Its symptoms can range from energy through the body’s electrical circuits.
coughing, sneezing, skin rashes, and diarrhoea These energy blockages cause interference
to swelling, fatigue, and fever. In some cases, in the communication between the brain and
allergy can be life-threatening too. the body that happens through the nervous
system. This unleashes a chain of events that
Technically, an allergy is a damaging immune can develop into an allergic response.”
response of the body to a particular substance.
But right after encountering the source of the Explaining the procedure of this therapy,
allergy, all we do is to avoid the allergen (the Sister Naina said, “NAET is a synthesis of
substance causing the allergic reaction). We various medical disciplines such as allopathy,
deny the fact that untreated allergies are often acupuncture, chiropractic, kinesiology, and
the cause of common or chronic illnesses, nutrition.” The NAET treatment stimulates
which, when left untreated, can become pressure points along the spine, from the neck
serious or critical. to the sacrum, while the patient is holding
an allergen. After the treatment, a strong
To treat such diseases, Dr Devi S. Nambudripad, MRT (Muscle Response Testing) procedure
licencedacupuncturist,MD,PhD(acupressure), is done, which indicates that the allergy has
discovered NAET (Nambudripad’s Allergy been removed. Specific acupressure points
Elimination Techniques) in 1983 and began are then massaged, or acupuncture needles
an extensive research programme for a may be inserted for 20 minutes to stabilise the
new, effective approach to the diagnosis and treatment. Then the patient is asked to avoid
elimination of allergies. Her knowledge of the substance completely for 25 hours for best
Eastern and Western medicine gave her the results. Allergens are treated and cleared one
ability to develop this unique treatment. at a time in a specific sequence,” she added.

Dr Sister Naina, SND (Sisters of Notre Sister Naina has been practising NAET
Dame), who came across this therapy while since 2003 very successfully at her clinic at
researching on the possibility of eliminating Koramangala in Bangalore. Through NAET,
allergies in children with autism, got herself people have been treated successfully for
directly trained under Dr Devi S. Nambudripad. conditions like arthritis, asthma, depression,
Talking about the effect of allergy on a person, migraine, thyroid problems, autism, etc. So
she said, “The allergen is viewed as a threat why wait for the allergies to play with your
by the brain of the person. So, when our body well-being when NAET can treat them all?
comes in contact with an allergen, it causes
blockages in the energy pathways called

12 LifePositive | JUNE 2019



HEARTSPEAK One lucky
mother!
14 LifePositive | JUNE 2019
Kamalini Natesan shares what
it is like for parents to bring up a
child with gender dysphoria and
to have the conviction to give their
whole-hearted support to what is

seen by many as an anomaly

I’m one lucky mother, I’ve
realised. But you might ask,
“Aren’t all mothers lucky?”
The very fact that they’ve been
able to birth an infant or more, makes
them special, truly special, and it does
make them lucky. There are many women
who have had to resort to surrogacy, in-
vitro, and what have you, the yearning to
parent a child being what it is. So, what
makes us parents extra special, gives us
the extra edge over other mothers and
fathers? The fact that we first birthed a
daughter and then a son? Nope, that’s not
it, certainly not. It’s because my partner
and I did indeed birth two children, a
female and a male child, but then we

got extra lucky, not simply because I had It was humungous actually—and it wasn’t
two perfect surgeries to deliver these two painless.
but because we, as parents, have had the
pleasure and privilege of a daughter and I read books, met a few other beautiful
a son for twenty-one years, and now two transgenders who had already arrived on
daughters! My second kid came out and told the other side, i.e. had had their surgeries
us he has gender dysphoria, that he suffered and led a far happier existence afterwards.
and wondered why he suffered, till he came I wrote about it on my blog. I was cited as
to terms with a fact: he was trapped in the brave and amazing to the world. And why
wrong body; his sensibilities were feminine, would that be courageous I asked myself,
and he yearned to be a girl. He explained to and a dear friend enlightened me, saying,
us that he was always more comfortable “It’s cause most folk are unwilling to accept
with girls, as opposed to macho boys. We their child’s truth and deny that Nature can
had known him to always be surrounded by make mistakes in allotting a body.” Well,
girl friends and found it perfectly natural for Nature does and has made what one might
our attractive young fella to have girls fawn call mistakes—conjoined twins, a hole in
over him. It did shock us then because, while the heart; what might these then be? It’s a
we believed our little one to be a perfect miracle when a child is born whole!
little boy, we had failed to perceive that he
was just a girlie fella, who enjoyed all the I did find a lot of mail in my mailbox when
gossiping and giggling. He was driven by a I posted on my blog about Chaithanya’s
need for female company, which he himself gender dysphoria. I was secretly messaged
called ‘my lot.’ We grappled with it some by many a troubled parent. They didn’t
more; he was not bisexual, he wasn’t gay, he want the world to know; they couldn’t
wasn’t like you or me—he just was a she! So, acknowledge this ‘horrific’ fact. There was
our son’s a transgender. How cool was that! so much shame attached to it, much to my
Well, not so cool. It meant up ahead on this chagrin. Their kid had also kept this crucial,
path, a painful re-assignment surgery would basic fact to themself and suffered in silence.
need to take place, and plenty of therapy, and
docs and hormones. It was a lot to take in.

Heartspeak 15

This community is looking to exist, really mostly to being
acknowledged. At the core of this ‘voice’ is a wish to belong
and to be permitted to flow in the mainstream, not be stuck in
a hurtling current, which drowns rather than carries along.

I wept copiously on reading some horror out every nuanced nervous move. It is just
stories about how the trans person ran from not like that, we realised, in the years that
home, sought solace from strangers, and we spent hoping and loving, and believing
sometimes had to sell themself for a meal that some day the child will ‘settle down.’ The
but couldn’t go back ‘home’ to continue to be father and I had our share of differences in
tormented by either jibes or a life of pretence. the manner we wished to ‘handle’ the child:
It shattered me repeatedly. I began to see to be hard or soft, to boycott when caught
my offspring in a new light, with renewed stealing or cutting classes, or to have a
affection, with a deeper understanding and straight talk and continue being kind? There
love above all. All I wanted was to protect was many an occasion when we would
my child from this cruel world, from folk that squabble bitterly. “Was love not enough?” we
would rather not know. “Ask me if I care,” asked ourselves when done.
asks the world.
There are days when one is left gaping
Aanya, as she now calls herself, underwent into vacant spaces and your heart is being
her own trauma and torment before coming ripped out of you, and all you do is stare at
out to us. She was also diagnosed with your child, love bursting its seams, yet the
bipolarity around the same time, which heart is rent with anxiety: “How will this kid
made this whole thing rather complex. So I survive, in this world, where differences
asked myself, “Is the occasional psychosis abound, yet these very differences make
because of the gender dysphoria or is the or break a person’s confidence. Either you
gender issue the underlying cause for all the revel in it, or you drown in it, and live a life of
obsessive and strange outlandish behaviour falsity, of duality, or worse. There’s no easy
of an addictive personality? Who really and sure shot solution to finding everlasting
knows? The psychiatrist who writes the happiness, is there?”
prescription to help subvert psychosis? The
therapist who we’ve been seeing for years This world is rife with a rising outbreak
to help our kid and save our souls? Does of the LGBTQ community, and I use the
anyone have clarity—complete, unflinching word ‘outbreak’ because, at long last, this
clarity of the whys and wherefores of such community is making itself visible, is being
like?” Nope, nah, not nearly enough. Yet, we heard, and is speaking up undeterred, at the
bought it all, hook, line and sinker. This is risk of being sidelined, even though its voice
not something that can be calculated and is neither brittle nor weak. This community
rationally explained and have pills to sort is looking to exist, really mostly to being

16 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

acknowledged. At the core of this ‘voice’ is
a wish to belong and to be permitted to flow
in the mainstream, not be stuck in a hurtling
current, which drowns rather than carries
along. If only the world would nurture this
community and aid its becoming what it
is meant to—not stand in its way and have
it spend its life, simply fighting for its very
existence. It’s as if they were invisible, the
LGBTQ folk, and by snuffing their voice,
the narrow and closed minds of the world
at large make it so obvious, that one is not
willing to coexist in accord. The world would
rather have a robotic disharmony than a
diverse harmony, right?

My child, my beautiful son-daughter will
have a place under the sun, we’ve promised
ourselves. We are clinging to our own sense
of fairness and are ready to take on anyone
who dares say it’s odd, and it’s not okay to be
born in one body, and then say, “Give me a
different one, better suited to my ethos.”

The fact is that no amount of reading helped
quell the angst in our parental veins. What
did help was conversations with other
trans folk, some contact with her kind, to
understand what it is to live trapped. How
constricting and how torturous it can be,
made us see more and more clearly what
our Aanya may have suffered over the
years, unbeknownst to her. Today, we find
ourselves solidly steering in a direction we
are all comfortable with as a family—onward
ahoy—we and our two daughters! The world
has far more interesting people than we are
willing to admit or even acknowledge.
I’m just such a lucky mother, I am!

We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article.
Mail us at [email protected]

Heartspeak 17

CLOSE ENCOUNTER

Steeped in gratitude

Manoj Lekhi explains to Rishi Rathod why he quit his multi-crore
business to further the cause of Siddha Samadhi Yoga founded by his

guru Rishi Prabhakar

18 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

When my editor asked me doubting every ritual. There were loads of
to interview Manoj Lekhi, questions in my mind but no answers. During
an educationist, author, my college time I was into smoking, drinking
spiritual teacher and life- and even doing drugs. After college I started
skill coach based in Mumbai, I was curious. my own business which flourished rapidly
She had attended his gratitude workshop and so did my party life.  Since money was
and was all praises for his brilliant methods, not a problem, I partied and enjoyed every
deep insights and razor-sharp techniques weekend. Yet since college times while doing
that were helping people vault out of their all of this, there was an underlying voice
painful life-situations. that kept nudging me. While puffing smoke
into my lungs, sipping alcohol or inhaling the
She had seen major turnarounds happen in powder, the voice kept telling me that there
the lives of people before her eyes and was was something more to life than all this.
impressed by Manoj’s kindness, empathy as  
well as his deep understanding of the human So, what changed for you? What was the
condition. turning point?
Once I happened to attend the SSY (Siddha
I met Manoj Lekhi in Hotel Suba International, Samadhi Yoga) programme.  When I met
a suburban hotel in the crowded Andheri my Guru, Rishi Prabhakarji, something
area of Mumbai, which is alive for most part connected me to him deeply. The more he
of the day with the bustle of traffic, heat and talked about life and living, the more I fell in
dust from the hurried feet of office goers. love with him. I knew I had found my heart, I
Inside, Lekhi met me calm, composed and knew this was my place, my home. By the end
unmoved like a yogi, a centered being in a of the programme I was a different person.
chaotic world. Dressed in a green kurta, white  
pajama and a laptop bag on his shoulder, he I attended more programmes and learned
also wore a gentle smile as people touched simple yet powerful principles of living
his feet in reverence. His manner suggested a happy and blissful life at the feet of my
that he was more of a friend than a guru. I beloved Guru. 
walked up to him and we began talking.    
At 28 I made a sankalp (decision) that by 35
Have you always been a spiritual person? I will quit my business and focus on self-
In my early years till about 10 years I was transformation, reading, meditation and
a very religious child who participated in seva. And the beautiful part is that I moved
artis, and poojas on a regular basis. After out at 32, three years earlier than I planned.
this phase I became rebellious and started  

Close Encounter 19

Whether it is gadgets, vehicles or houses, if you complain that
a particular gadget is not right or a vehicle is not right or a
certain house is not proper, you will limit yourself. You will feel
constrained because you have not mastered the art of enjoying

what is in front of you.

What prompted you to disengage from astonish you when practice correctly. We
your business to serve SSY? help you see what happens in your body
My company was generating crores in and mind when you practice “gratitude” and
revenue and I was making lakhs every “taking responsibility.”
month. I was leading a really good life as  
far as money was concerned. But vairagya We are living in a very challenging time.
(disenchantment from the world) was Attention spans are dropping rapidly,
knocking at the door. Somehow I was losing instant gratification is the default normal,
interest in going to office at 9 and coming and people who pursue spiritual practices
back in the evening. I wanted to feel and are questioned every day. How does one
discover more in life. I wanted to read books, stay happy in such a situation?
meditate and discover more about myself. To deal with this situation we at the SSY
And then one day my Guru told me to take the have created a programme called SSY
plunge. I took my chance with complete faith Expression, where we have combination of
in my Guru and since then there has been no five-six segments of one day programmes.
looking back. I am still discovering and it has Our methodology is simple. We don’t give
been a deeply satisfying journey so far. talks but provide practical tools to deal with
   these current epidemics. We see that it’s
Does SSY’s spiritual practices include the not the issue of good or bad but of low and
use of mantras? high vibration. The issue which our society
We do not encourage any kind of chanting at is facing today is of people operating on low
SSY. We believe in the scientific approach. vibration. For this, the solution is clear. With
All our tools and practices are based on our practical tools and techniques we make
quantum mechanics that can be used in people shift to higher vibrations. We have
day-to-day practical living. So let’s say we created an app called Liya app (Life Yessence
tell you to practice “no complaint.” We take Academy) where you practice the suggested
you through the process to show you what techniques for few minutes every day.
happens in your brain when you complain You start seeing the results from the first
and how it poisons your system. Similarly, month itself if you sincerely practice them.
how things change in you when you stop Gradually you start operating from high
complaining and how the results can vibrations most of the times and all these

20 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

Close Encounter 21

issues disappear like they never existed. In Manoj Lekhi has transformed thousands of lives
some time you come to your normal state of by showing them the magic of being in gratitude
being happy effortlessly.
end your day by practising gratitude. We
Also most people are in complaining zone. have numerous examples and testimonies
We help them come out of it and increase of people who have practised gratitude, and
their range of happiness.  Take for example reaped its benefits. They are more relaxed,
material wealth. Whether it is gadgets, calm and composed while going about their
vehicles or houses, if you complain that a daily work. Balance is the byproduct of
particular gadget is not right or a vehicle is living in gratitude. With this practice things
not right or a certain house is not proper, you have fallen in place for me too. I have loads
will limit yourself. You will feel constrained of work to do, there is often a shortfall
because you have not mastered the art of of money and I have to manage the Rishi
enjoying what is in front of you. Gurukulam Ashram Vidyalay as well, but
while facing all this I flow with happiness.
If you are able to be in tremendous gratitude By being in gratitude we recognise the gifts
for whatever you have, you increase your life has given in small-small things which we
range of happiness. In other words, the usually take for granted, such as our body,
more “Ok” you are with the way things are, our relationships, children, and things and
the happier you will be. people we are interdependent upon.

What is the purpose of life?
There is no purpose to life. You are completely
relaxed when life’s events don’t increase
your blood pressure whether it is politics,
spouse, parents or events in general. When
you are unmoved by these then you can see
the game of life and just to play the game of
life, you choose the purpose.
 
I have gotten 400 people to commit to play
this game. We are regularly in touch and
have chosen the purpose that suits each
one of us. We call this rising together in
consciousness, where we learn, help,
support each other and earn too.

For many people who want to follow the
spiritual path its’ difficult to manage
family, work and spiritual sadhana. How
can one strike a balance?
My answer to this is gratitude. Start and

22 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

We make people see their behavioral falter a couple of times but when you take
patterns and their habit of complaining all responsibility for yourself, then you keep
the time. Complaints lead to more complaints. at it even if you fail multiple times. We even
We can’t see the solutions because we are provide you a guide to make your journey
vibrating at low level. To tackle this we give less cumbersome. In every situation and at
people the tool of being in gratitude every all times you have to remember that you are
day. responsible for your own happiness. You can
  take charge of your life, health, relationship
Is gratitude the only spiritual practice you and help others do the same.
make your students do?  
No it is one of them. Through all our The reverse is also true. You start teaching
programmes we give participants the or doing seva and at some point in the
techniques to be free of complaints and be journey you get it clearly. We are students of
in surrender. These are important spiritual life. Guruji says, “Everyone can be a teacher.”
practices but the key to success is taking  
responsibility. When you begin the practice I noticed you instructing people on what
of being in gratitude and not complaining to eat and how to eat. Is there anything
it takes time to see the results. You may specific you recommend?

Close Encounter 23

Every time we complain about how the world works, the
government works, the society works; we add poison to our
body. Every time we shout at our staff, employees, or curse our

boss, we add deadly poison to our system.

Yeah! We recommend not eating non- The reality is when they get those comforts
vegetarian foods as they takes 72 hours to they realise something is amiss. True
digest but it has nothing to do with religion. happiness comes from within and we have
We tell our fellow students to plan their never taught them how to sit quietly with
meals 50 per cent raw and 50 per cent themself, how to introspect and dig deeper
cooked. Generally speaking our suggestion within yourself. Loneliness, emptiness
is that the lesser we eat the better we are. and anxiety are the fruits of what we are
  feeding ourselves with. We are not against
What is your take on controlling vasanas/ material comforts or wealth but practising
desires? detachment and gratitude can give people
According to me we must master our senses the fulfillment they are longing for.
but not control them. Controlling comes from  
will power which makes you vibrate on low You have been a successful entrepreneur
level, whereas mastering the senses come and are now completely devoted to
from the higher chakras. It elevates you and promoting your Guruji’s work. What
makes you operate on a higher level. People is the difference between running a
confuse happiness with pleasure. Senses spiritual organisation and commercial
give you pleasure but are always dependent organisation?
on others whereas happiness comes from I was doing my business for myself which
within. made me and my family wealthy but not
  necessarily happy. The spiritual path not
Despite the increase in worldly comforts, only gives me immense satisfaction and
a large part of the population feels tense, happiness but also benefits my fellow human
and unhappy. Many look lonely. What is beings. I realise that it is a drop in the ocean
the solution for this? but the welfare of fellow human beings
From the beginning we are taught to earn is paramount and in the end that’s what
our living through the rat race. We teach our matters.
young ones to grab bigger and bigger pies.

*Manoj Lekhi will be conducting the gratitude workshop at the Coimbatore International
Spiritual Festival on August 24, 2019.

We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article.
Mail us at [email protected]

24 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

Talking.Tales.v05C.pdf 1 28/03/17 3:07 PM Cursed_at_Kedarnath_Cover.pdf 1 23/03/17 2:12 PM

What do tales speak about Hauntings
when they talk? Cursed At Kedarnath & SOtothrieers
Reincarnation
Is it of wishing spells, vfuy HkVukxj jsdh ‘kj.ke~xPNkfe
or the way dinosaurs walk? True stories from recent times

What falls out Spirit Communication Possession
when you turn a page?
A woman in Delhi remembers the hell which surrounded her at
Is it dwarf's wisdom, an old sacred site in Kedarnath.
or a giant's rage?
Pick up the book, A radio in a Kolkata apartment reaches out and contacts spirits.
and hear it speak.
A murdered courtesan from centuries ago appears in a
Maybe it has answers mirror at a Jaipur hotel.
that you seek.
These and many more stories delve into the deepest
About the Author parts of man and spirit, bringing together science
Bharat Shekhar lives in New Delhi. and the supernatural with legend and lore.
He tries to write when he can, and doodles when he can't.
Psychic researcher and lawyer, Cursed
Deepta is the daughter of Indiaʼs best at Kedarnath
known Wiccan Ipsita Roy Chakraverti. & other Stories
Deepta holds a first degree in
Mathematics from the University of
Delhi and a degree in law from Kingʼs
College London. She is working in a
legal capacity with an oil and energy
major in India and is also General
Secretary of The Wiccan Brigade.
Deepta is the author of Bhangarh to
Bedlam: Haunted Encounters.

Author Photo by Srabasti

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Riki cover.pdf 1 21/10/16 10:16 AM jsdh ‘kj.ke~
xPNkfe
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LEAD STORY

WHAT
TRIGGERS REVEAL

ANGER
ANXIETY
GUILT
JEALOUSY

Our emotional triggers are not merely our reactions
to unpleasant situations but are an indicator to deeper
underlying issues related to self-worth and self-acceptance

says Sharmila Bhosale

26 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

You are passing by on a street shop and start walking towards your home,
on a lazy afternoon, humming he suddenly flares up and tells you that you
happily to yourself when the always try to dictate things to him, how you do
aroma of freshly baked biscuits not respect his wishes, and how you always
wafts by from a nearby bakery. They smell of like to dominate him. You are aghast, upset
roasted chocolate, cashews and something and close to tears. How did a suggestion turn
unmistakable that you cannot pin down. into an angry tirade? Spilling into the entire
You inhale this delicious medley and pause evening and sullying the entire atmosphere
in your tracks as a wave of a deep and at home.
undefinable sadness washes over you. You Can you spot the common factor in these
seem to dissolve in this feeling of gloom as the instances?
aromas mingle around you, finding that your
feet have a leaden, heavy quality to them. Triggers: Short-circuits in the mind
Running through all these seemingly diverse
You have worked extremely hard on a project examples are experiences of something
report. You are proud of the outcome and coming by without warning and taking you
as you clip it in a file; you feel a sense of hostage. Shooting you down actually, without
fulfilment. You couldn’t have done better. You giving you any time to defend yourself against
stride into your boss’ cabin and hand it over its sharp onslaught. Like a bullet finding its
to him, on target, on deadline. He smiles, and mark.
reads it, pausing on certain pages to mark
something with his pen. He hands it over to Srilatha Srikant, Psychotherapist and REBT
you when he’s done, saying good job, but also practitioner says, “Something occurs, you
pointing out that there are some areas which react, and then you automatically make
need changes and improvements. He says up a reason that seems to justify why you
he has marked it and asks you to work on it reacted that way. For example, your child
and bring it back tomorrow. You feel a slow tells you he got poor marks in a weekly math
flush of anger building up within you, and test and you explode angrily. You blame
something throbs in your head. At the same your boss for making you work overtime,
time you feel rejected and criticised. thereby preventing you from monitoring your
son’s studies. You feel as if you are being
You go out festival shopping with your treated unfairly or unjustly by the world in
spouse. As always, he overspends, buying general. Much later, you feel guilty that you
more sweetmeats than necessary. While overreacted and wonder why you did so.”
he is making the purchase, you tell him that
there is no need to buy so much, and to cut Little wonder, that these emotions that hijack
down a few things. He doesn’t listen and you your senses and moods are called triggers.
give up while he pays the bill. As you leave the

Lead Story 27

Triggers are like little psychic explosions that
crash through avoidance and bring the dissociated,
avoided trauma suddenly, unexpectedly, back into

consciousness. - Carolyn Spring

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Emotional triggers are people, words, “If my emotional trig9gteh r&s10wtheFreeb,a2n0g1e9r an09dth & 10th Mar, 201
opinions, circumstances, or environmental
situations that provoke an intense and irritation, physically I could feel the adrenaline
excessively emotional reaction within us. It is
any topic that makes us feel uncomfortable. rush to my hands and legs and I would grit my
They reveal or try to alert us to those
aspects in our life we might feel frustrated or teeth and even curse the concerned person,
unsatisfied with.
which would be followed by a headache. I
Quoting Epictetus, an early Stoic philosopher,
who said, ‘People are disturbed not by would feel physically drained. I would either
things, but by their views of things,’ Srikant
says, “Our emotional problems are closely lash out at the person or do the same alone. I
linked to how we think about ourselves,
others and the world and how we act, based ended up cribbing and complaining the whole
on such thinking. Our emotional triggers
may be reminders of past hurts or wounds day to people who were not even related to
that haven’t healed; they may be threads
of past stories or relationships that are the incident. The environment around me
still left hanging. They make us feel stuck,
psychologically threatened and often caught would be chaotic and gloomy as a result,” she
in dysfunctional behavioural patterns. These
are our ‘hot buttons’ and we often display says.
a primal ‘fight or flight’ reaction to these
perceived threats.” Kinds of triggers
Triggers can take many forms. They may be a
Like many of us, Bhakti Vora, a homemaker, physical location, for instance a place which
was, for many years, an emotional evokes strong feelings which are tied to an
‘matchstick’. Her (over) reactions to situations incident or the anniversary of the traumatic
and people left her emotionally burnt out. She event. A person could also be triggered by
used to get inflamed at (in hindsight, a pattern internal processes such as stress.
of) perceived provocations. She would burn
inside at what she would consider slights and Sometimes triggers are predictable, or
insults. apparent. For instance, a soldier may have
flashbacks while watching a violent movie.
In other cases, triggers are more subtle. A
person who smelled a particular perfume
during a sexual assault may have a panic
attack when they smell the same perfume
in a store. But most times we are cognitively
not aware that our outbursts are related to a
particular unpleasant memory.

More often than not, the brunt of our
reaction is borne by people who are not
linked to the original trigger at all. In fact

28 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

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Lead Story 29

We often over react when we feel that our deep-seated beliefs are being challenged

after our outburst, we often feel a sense of There are several apparent reasons:
embarrassment and guilt, and wonder, as Contradictory beliefs and values: When
do people around us – ‘where did that come we align ourselves strongly or are deeply
from’? attached to a way of thinking we find it difficult
to be tolerant of other beliefs. That’s because
The entire build-up from being triggered to we feel a certain comfort or acceptance in
acting out occurs very swiftly, blurring the our beliefs. When they are opposed, we feel
distinction between the physical sensations challenged and attacked. We get triggered
and psychological resonance. It seems like since we think they are calling into question
a single reaction to the incident or person in what we identify with. Rethink of all the hot
front of us, but looking back we realise it was buttons that religion has pressed over the
an over- reaction and are puzzled as to why years. So much so that people often steer
we reacted that way. clear of discussing religion or politics since it
evokes strong reactions.
Why do we get triggered?
But why do we get triggered? How does an Previous trauma: When we have experienced
incident which could have happened years any kind of trauma and haven’t integrated it
ago carry a charge so much time later? A into our system, a residual unresolved charge
charge which we don’t even seem to be aware of that event remains in our body. We may
of. What causes people to react so differently have suppressed strong feelings which arose
to the same situation? that time, and these feelings remain locked

30 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

The people who trigger us to feel negative emotion
are messengers. They are messengers for the
unhealed parts of our being. -Teal Swan

in our system, coming out at unexpected a minor event involving my mother-in-law,”
moments much to our horror. When we see, says Srikala Srikant.
hear, touch or smell something that reminds
us of that experience, we get triggered and Perceived inadequacy: Since triggers are
a strong reaction tumbles out. A man who often linked to a perceived inadequacy about
was assaulted by his alcoholic mother as a ourselves, any comment or action linked to
child might be triggered whenever he smells that space triggers a reaction. For instance,
alcohol. An adult who never fit in as a child while growing up I was among the first in
may feel triggered when seeing groups of class to get spectacles, and children being
people having fun. children, often was at the receiving end
of jokes like ‘double eyes’ and ‘chasmis’. I
Safeguarding the ego: The ego is an inherent spent many moments thinking of a smart
self-built proof of identity that we carry comeback, trying to push away the feeling of
around like a badge of honour. Depending hurt, staging imaginary scenarios in my head
on the extent to which we identify with it, we about my looks, and yet could not help feeling
get triggered when it is hurt or challenged less than others in some ways. This sense of
by others. We then argue, belittle, defame, unease with my physicality remained with
demean, backstab, sabotage and even me for a few years, and any remark about
assault people who we feel pose a threat to my spectacled look produced a revulsion
its survival. within me, so much so that I would label and
judge that person as someone not worthy
Suppressing feelings: If we suppress our of having as a friend. The feeling of being
original feelings because of any fear, they attacked persisted for a significant amount
are likely to burst out unwittingly at the press of the day. Likewise, if, for example, if I am
of any unconscious button. feeling very insecure about my performance
at work, a mere suggestion by my boss that
“We sometimes deny or suppress our feelings she is slightly concerned about my project’s
because they are so painful. For example, if I progress may cause a trigger reaction in me.
get angry when I argue with my mother-in- And another colleague who is confident of her
law, I may tend to stuff that anger or pretend work will not react or retaliate in the same
that things aren’t really so bad. So, I may way if the boss makes a similar comment to
withdraw physically or emotionally from that her.
situation. But feelings can’t be bottled up for
long. They boomerang at unlikely moments. What triggers reveal
For example, I may tend to overreact at even Our triggers are indicators to our pain body,

Lead Story 31

the hurt inner child that we continue to carry Dr. Brené Brown: “Wherever perfectionism is driving us,
within ourselves long after we have grown shame is riding shotgun.”
up.
within ourselves for answers, instead of
We often carry an unhealed negative belief indulging in blame-game and pointing a finger
about ourselves that gets triggered by an at external factors, is the key to disarming
external stimulus. Once we get to the origin the triggers.
of this belief it is not difficult to control and
overcome out triggers. Identifying triggers
Identifying your triggers is the first crucial
But the question is how do we get to the root step in bringing them to the fore. They can
of our discomfort, to the hot seat of our hot be dismantled through recognition and
buttons, which may be buried so deep within attention. They can be dissolved in the
that it might take many layers to excavate? crucible of attention and acceptance.
How do we manage our triggers and stop
being hijacked by our emotions? A close friend tells you that she has landed her
dream job. You feel you should be happy for
In Brené Brown’s book, Dare to Lead, she her, but instead find a strong undercurrent
mentions, “Wherever perfectionism is driving of envy coursing through you.
us, shame is riding shotgun.” The truth is,
most of our emotional triggers stem from There’s someone you follow on FB with whom
perfectionism. We feel ashamed to admit you are constantly comparing yourself.
that we’re angry because we have see a co- Maybe because you want the amount of likes
worker get a promotion. Or when we see that that the person receives.
our best friend is more popular, while we What’s the thing that bothers you the most
might still be struggling with being accepted. about their posts? How do you handle it?

Embrace vulnerability
Whatever the ‘theme’ or ‘topic’ that fosters
these unpleasant feelings in us, it’s important
to put shame aside. Brené Brown motivates
us to embrace vulnerability and truly ask
ourselves: “What is it about this person’s
experiences or opportunities that make me
so angry?” If we allow ourselves to ask this
question, we can begin to spot our emotional
triggers. Bring them into focus, bring them
out in the open so that we may see them,
understand them, for that is the only way we
can deal with them.

Disciplined self -work
Engaging in disciplined self-work, which
includes introspection, being aware of our
feelings, noticing our reactions and looking

32 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

When we are more aware, we begin to take
responsibility for the way we manage our emotions,
how we self-regulate as opposed to letting emotions
get the better of us. We learn to not be at the mercy of

our emotions.

What about a certain topic of conversation of our own mental health. It offers us valuable
that triggers you every time–whether emotional literacy, a currency that brings a
you’re hanging out with your friends or in a wealth of benefits to the quality of our life.
family setting? What do they talk about that When we are more aware, we begin to take
always raises your hackles, keeps you on responsibility for the way we manage our
the edge, leaves your bristling for some time emotions, how we self-regulate as opposed
afterwards? to letting emotions get the better of us. We
learn to not be at the mercy of our emotions.
Answering these questions openly and It’s when we can’t manage or process them
honestly can bring you closer to spotting appropriately, we end up reacting with
your emotional triggers. others.

“Acknowledging and accepting our feelings, Pay attention to your bodily reactions
no matter how negative, and developing How do we know we are being triggered?
the capacity to tolerate intense emotions, is How do we know we are acting or reacting
important.” Says Srikant. out of a buried upset? The best place to
look for an answer is within our body. In
“At all times, asking ourselves, ‘What was our physiological changes. That is the first
going on in my mind when I was experiencing place our trigger shows up, throwing open
that feeling of anger/anxiety/guilt/jealousy our festering wound. For instance, common
and the like’ is key to understanding our symptoms of being under the influence of a
triggers,” she adds. trigger include trembling, a racing heart,
choking or trouble breathing/swallowing,
Some themes behind our triggers could be: hot flushes or chills, dizziness or nausea,
• Feeling humiliated chest discomfort, a feeling of detachment/
• Feeling rejected unreality (known as dissociation), sweating.
• Feeling invalidated These are followed by a full-blown attack
• Feeling helpless which consists of intense emotions such as
• Feeling small hatred, disgust, anger, fear, terror, grief,
• Feeling unloved/unlovable/unworthy resulting in self-protective behaviour such
as shouting, arguing, insulting, hiding, crying,
The important thing about identifying our or otherwise emotionally reacting.
triggers is that it allows us to be more aware

Lead Story 33

Journaling regularly can help you identify your emotional triggers

Notice any tensing of muscles, increased everyday. Physical ailments like acidity and
heart rate, hot or cold flushes, tingles, or skin allergies made me rethink and realise
any physical change that generally indicates that they were in fact connected to my
contraction (or physically recoiling from psychological triggers i.e. anger and fear.”
what you’re experiencing). Turn it into
a game: what is the first reaction your Notice your thoughts
body has? Do your fists clench? Does your Look for extreme thoughts with polarised
breathing accelerate? Does your face turn viewpoints (i.e. someone or something is
hot? Mentally note these reactions and even good/bad, right/wrong, nice/evil). You just
write them down to journal about. Remember have to be aware of these thoughts without
that physical reactions can be subtle all the reacting to them. Let them play out in your
way to extreme – so don’t rule out anything. mind. What story is your mind creating about
the other person or situation? I recommend
Says Bhakti Vora after years of deep work simply listing these thoughts in your journal
in identifying her underlying patterns, to enhance your self-awareness.
“My emotional trigger was fear, and I felt
butterflies in my stomach. In the long run Who or what triggered the emotion?
it culminated in chronic acidity which in Once you have become aware of your physical
turn affected my skin and I became prone reactions and thoughts notice who or what
to throat allergies. I would not be able to has triggered the extreme physical and
confront the actual people but removed my emotional responses within you. Sometimes
frustration on close family. Over a period of you will discover a single object, word, smell
time I started realising that I wasn’t at peace or another sense impression that triggers
and I wasn’t motivated or looking forward to you. Other times, you will notice that you are

34 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

We are not a victim of our emotions or thoughts. We
can understand our triggers and use them as tools to

help us respond more objectively.
–Elizabeth Thornton

triggered by a certain belief, viewpoint, or an Here are some effective techniques to disarm
overall situation. For example, your trigger your triggers. What is crucial is consistent
could range from anything like loud noises, practice and awareness.
to men who are overly dominating and
opinionated. Not only that, but you may have Journal
a whole series of triggers (most people do), As discussed before, to pinpoint your
so be vigilant and open to perceiving a whole patterns, and see your reactions, putting
spectrum of things that set you off. As always, them down in black and white, shows up your
it’s important that your record these triggers triggers in a clearer light. Write down your
in some kind of journal (whether printed or feelings and reactions in a para or more,
digital). Writing down these triggers will every single day. After every fortnight go
help to sear them into your mind so that you through the pages. You will get insights into
remain self-aware in the future. your thought patterns and behaviour. You
will also be able to spot certain common
How to handle triggers undercurrents that run through all your
Once you are able to identify your ‘raw nerves’ diverse situations. Once you spot them make
or ‘hot buttons’, a few exercises may help a note of them too. A few months later you
you lessen, and then dissipate their impact. will get to know yourself in a deeper way.
“With a combination of regular meditation,
nature walks and pranic healing; I was able Being emotionally triggered always goes
to work on my triggers and bring about a back to not having one or more of our deepest
considerable change in my behaviour and needs/desires met. Take some time to think
my outlook towards life,” says Bhakti Vora, about which of your needs or desires are
who feels more at peace with herself and being threatened.
calm during her interactions with others. Her
close friends have noticed the change in her Srilatha Srikant says, “Emotional triggers
over the years. “When faced with situation could relate to negative or painful experiences
that would earlier have made me angry I now that we may have had in the past. The origin
end up responding instead of reacting most of our triggers may be scripted by our earlier
of the times. In terms of fear I have worked relationships. However, it’s not past events
hard on courage. I no longer feel that fear that cause us present misery. We maintain
when faced with a situation. I stay calm the current disturbance by the unhelpful
and try to think rationally. Result being the self-talk and things we say to ourselves about
situation isn’t that huge at all. that past event. If I’ve been treated badly

Lead Story 35

Some typical emotional triggers. See which one you most identify with:
• You feel anxious when someone leaves you.
• You think that a person is not listening to you.
• You feel helpless over situations where you have no control.
• You do not feel valued or appreciated.
• You feel that you are not good enough.
• You think that you are being judged all the time.
• You feel belittled and worthless.
• You feel controlled by someone.
• Someone is making you feel guilty about leaving them.
• Someone is never happy to see you.
• Someone is harassing you sexually.
• Someone is being too needy and wants to cling to you.

or cheated upon by boyfriends in the past, Restore
I may well have trust issues and may keep Remove yourself from the situation. By
telling myself that I am essentially unlovable. walking away from a potentially heated
This causes my disturbance.” situation you distance yourself physically
from the event, restoring a degree of
Refocus distance. If you are speaking with someone,
Remove your attention from the person or excuse yourself temporarily. Return when
situation and focus on your breath. Not only you are feeling more centred and calm.
will it centre you, but also help you view your
reaction in a detached manner as if viewing Accept your feelings, but don’t act on them
yourself from afar as one of the players in an Repressing or trying to “control” your feelings
exchange. Keep focusing on your in-breath will only enhance the triggers. However, you
and out-breath for a few minutes. If your can delay your emotions. For instance, if
attention goes back to the triggering person you’re feeling enraged by someone, instead
or situation, pull your attention back to your of exploding at them, consciously set those
breathing. feelings aside to experience and unleash
later in a healthy way. You might choose to
36 LifePositive | JUNE 2019 express this anger by screaming in your room

or punching a pillow or throwing darts. Whatever the case, be very mindful of repressing your
emotions. There is a fine line between consciously delaying your emotions and unconsciously
suppressing them.

As Peter Hollins says in his book The Hidden Influences Behind Our Actions, Thoughts, and
Behaviours, “A psychological trigger is something that causes us to act out of urgency – not
correctness or even happiness. It’s a switch that is flipped outside of our consciousness.” And
this acts as a fertile ground for some of the worst decisions of our life. Managing our triggers
could well be a game changer for us. Instead of firing in the dark, and being a hostage to our own
self, we can learn to defuse the triggers, see the light, and set our selves free.

We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article.
Mail us at [email protected]

Lead Story 37

From Passana to Vipassana

(Translated from Pali—From seeing to seeing with a new perspective)

Melt the ego of I and mine,
Merge with all, don’t draw a line.
Trees are your lungs if you would know,
Would you ever cut, or let them grow?

Your body is a garment your soul wears,
Disembodied, it could be assigned to a new-born bear.

In him is your chip, your memories, your thoughts,
In awareness, won’t you love him with all you’ve got?

What is this life and how do we know,
The technique to live and be liberated as we go?

Texts have all the theories,
Religions have rituals for every query.

What one is saying is nothing new,
Only a solution with a different view.
The path was there but with darkness and fear,
The technique holds a torch for the path to clear.
Steeped in craving, aversion, immortality,
In futile clamour for material prosperity.
We deny the truth that this life is temporary,
Where birth and death are the only finality.

38 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

There is a way to live it right,
Whatever be your current plight.
To clear the debris and start anew,
All you need is your breath and you.

The nature of temporary holds the clues,
To unlock knots and clear your dues.
It can’t be told, experience you must
In an ambience created to trust.

If tomorrow morning you were not to see,
Would you not keep your ledger, balance free?

With that awareness lead your life,
This deep understanding evaporates strife.

It’s not that miseries will disappear,
Joy and sorrow will appear.

This too shall pass, will be so ingrained
Equanimity will see you through pleasure and pain.

It’s simple, straight, logical and fair,
Buddha holds your hand to get you there.
A lifetime he strived until enlightenment dawned,
Vipassana he named it, a new way to see was born.

Mithu Basu

This poem is inspired by my Vipassana experience, a stringent 10-day silent retreat held by the 225
Dhamma Centres across the globe.

Lead Story 39

GURUSPEAK

Do away with depression

Worries are inevitable, but one should not become a slave to
depression, as there’s always a way out, asserts Dadashreeji

Opening your eyes every at last, enters sleep. A few health. You will be shackled and
morning after a good night’s hours of uneasy, broken sleep, will remain far from your strong
rest brings you back to the same and you are back to reality the qualities. My friends, it’s okay
unwanted reality. Problems you next morning. Blessed are those to be depressed for a while but
wished to run away from, the who sleep well, take a deep dive, not for long. Depression can be
previous day, reappear and so and wake up fresh! a chapter in your life but not a
does your anxiety. Your choices book. It should not be the only
do not change the reality of the These daily worries impact story of your life.
day. your mind and gradually bring
about a change in you. It can Depression is an unwelcome
Soon, you realise that every only go in two directions: guest in your house. You have
day is the same as the previous they either strengthen you or to stand up strong and ask this
one—the same morning, the weaken you as a person. If it’s guest to leave immediately.
same people, the same place, the former, life is good, and it Remember! There is always a
and similar problems. Worries blesses you with abundance. way to come out of any difficult
are unending. You keep asking But if it’s the latter, instead of situation. Keep your hopes
the same questions to yourself being boosted with energy, you alive! If you want to see a quick
again and again: “Is this the are drained. You are constantly and positive change in yourself,
life we desired or is this what being hammered by the ever- start truly expressing your
life is all about?” “Did God want increasing demands of life. emotions to someone close to
me to remain unhappy in this Your close ones find you guilty you. If you can’t, then express it
life?” “Will I remain devoid of every time of not meeting their to the closest one—your Inner-
love?” “Why is life unfair to me?” expectations. For some, the Divine, your God.
“Is God punishing me?” “Will I physical body is in a bad state
able to experience a good and due to medical reasons. Life is eternally beautiful.
happy life?” All these questions Explore and experience it!
are asked by your perplexed You get bogged down with
mind every night before you your worries, leading to stress A profound Master and the Founder of
sleep or when you are alone. and anxiety. Under stress and Maitribodh Parivaar, Divine Friend Dadashreeji
Almost every night, the mind unable to solve your problems is a sublime blend of ancient wisdom and
futilely worries about the for long, you unknowingly invite modern insight.
future and ceaselessly thinks, depression. If you remain in this
contemplates, and analyses state of depression for more We welcome your comments and
everything. After some time in than three months, it will visibly suggestions on this article. Mail us
this internal struggle, the mind, start affecting your physical at [email protected]

40 LifePositive | JUNE 2019



FOOD

Summer sustenance

To get through these scorching days, Naini Setalvad gives us some cool dietary
advice which is simple and easy to follow

42 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

It’s the end of summer and, difference when you sip on water throughout
throughout the country, it is the entire day for a couple of days. I certainly
either hot and dry or hot and saw a change; my fatigue levels dropped.
humid. This is the worst period. Water also ensures a moist environment for
How I am looking forward to the raindrops the ear, nose, and throat, thus helping you
falling on my head! As usual, one hears of breathe freely. It also keeps sore throats at
heat strokes, heat boils, coughs, bad throats, bay.
dehydration, itchiness, and colds. From the
young to the old, nobody is spared this woe. Other cooling drinks
I am constantly guiding people on how to Water is not the only beverage you should
prevent succumbing to the aforementioned consume during the day. Swap it for a glass
diseases, or giving curative advice. of lemon juice and water along with some
rock salt and roasted cumin powder. This
Prevention, of course, is better than cure. concoction will help prevent sunstrokes
It is important to understand that just like and the Vitamin C-rich lemon juice will give
you change your clothes with a change in your immune system a boost. Buttermilk
weather, you have to change your food too. made from yoghurt, mint leaves, coriander,
The key factor in boosting your immune ginger, roasted cumin powder, and rock salt,
system is eating according to the laws of mixed with water, is the best Indian way to
nature. cool down. Since buttermilk is rich in friendly
probiotic bacteria, it helps keep irritable
So, let me educate you on how to sail through bowel syndrome and diarrhoea away.
the end of summer without falling prey to any
of the summer diseases. Understand that our Losing salt, sugars, and minerals during this
body is directly linked to the temperatures time is very common. So, it is necessary to
outside. So, when the outside temperature is see that your electrolytes are balanced.
rising, the body automatically wants to cool, Coconut water is one of the highest sources
and the summer food comes into play here. of electrolytes found in nature.
To remain energetic and not feel limp and
lethargic, I am going to share with you the Water-based fruits
advice that I constantly give my clients and Mother Nature has truly blessed us with
which I too follow. the perfect seasonal fruits for the summer
months. Truly, this is the time to savour
The key to surviving the summer is hydration some of the local water-based fruits that can
and electrolyte balance. It is very easy to do be sweet or tangy. My mouth melts when I
this if you just include certain beverages, think of mangoes, raw and ripe. Melons like
fruits, and vegetables. Water should be watermelon and muskmelon, palmyra (ice
treated as if it were a separate organ in apple), black plum (jamun), lychees, and
your body. Start your day with two glasses peaches are some of our summer fruits.
of water and see how you perk up! I suggest They are rich in natural sugars, fibre, and—
you keep on sipping room temperature water most importantly—are full of water. I make
the entire day as it will help cool down the sure I eat at least two of these daily to cool
body almost instantaneously. Just see the me down and quench my thirst.

Food 43

Munch on cucumbers (which are full of water) with lemon
juice and rock salt. For salads, onions and tomatoes with
chaat masala, lemon juice, and mint leaves are refreshing.
It is a common practice in dry regions of India to put a raw
onion below one’s headgear to take away the heat. The onions
also help stimulate the mucous linings, which helps prevent
summer coughs, colds, and sore throats.

Eat the gourd family
Vegetables cooked in rich gravies are impossible to digest in
the summer months without discomfort. One needs to opt for
the entire gourd family, pumpkins, cluster beans, and sword
beans, lightly seasoned with herbs and spices. Thank God,
India is rich in cooling spices, which keep us cool in the summer
months! Mint, roasted cumin seeds, coriander, fennel seeds,
and natural salts are some of the cooling summer spices and
herbs.

Whole wheat, unpolished rice, and millets like pearl millet
(jowar), barnyard millet (verghu), and occasionally, amaranth
(rajgirah) are good options. The potato is a great grain
replacement in the summer months; it is easy to quickly toss
up a potato chaat.

Go for sweet-sour
Instead of aerated drinks, go for the raw mango juice (panhaa)
or cumin water (jaljeera), and buttermilk. Complement your
food with mint chutneys and raw mango pickles. The sweet and
sour (khatta-meetha) taste makes your food more palatable,
automatically preventing you from reaching out for junk.

I would opt out of non-vegetarian foods as well as eggs in the
summer months as they are very heaty and difficult to digest.
Common sense tells you to avoid fried food, processed food,
white flour, white sugar, and creamy gravies.

By the way, I still recollect my childhood days when we used
to bathe in water in which dry neem leaves were soaked
overnight, to reduce the itching caused due to heat boils.

Just follow what I have told you and be cool this summer. The
secret is to feed your body with foods that keep you hydrated
and cool you down, helping you sail through this scorching
summer.

44 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

Mock Sev Puri
Ingredients:
100 gm potatoes, boiled
100 gm tomatoes, thick slices
100 gm cucumber, thick slices
50 gm onions, finely chopped
3 tbsp raw mango, finely chopped
¼ tsp cumin powder
2 tbsp coriander, finely chopped
2 tbsp dates (khajoor) chutney (optional)
2 tbsp green chutney
Salt and lemon to taste

Method:
• Mash the boiled potatoes and add lemon juice, salt, cumin, and finely chopped coriander.
• P lace the sliced cucumber in a plate, put tomato slices on top of it, add a few mashed

potatoes, some chopped onions, and then some chopped raw mango.
• Add both the chutneys, sprinkle cumin (jeera) powder, and lemon.
• G arnish with coriander and serve.

We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article.
Mail us at [email protected]

Food 45

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EVOLUTION The ktharremaads of

What is karma? It can be described as the law of cause and effect. Your actions
in past incarnations impact your current dispositions and conditions. This
influence may be subtle or direct, depending on the intensity of your past life
experiences. It is perhaps surprising for some people to know that much of our
personality and the choices we make in life are influenced by karmic predispositions.

48 LifePositive | JUNE 2019

Charles Shahar lucidly explains how relationships
are founded on the bedrock of karma and its impact

on our consciousness

We have all reincarnated many times before. birth and death. This is not an easy task, but
Before our human incarnations, we lived an when we reach enlightened consciousness,
earthly life as lower forms of consciousness, it is no longer necessary for us to return. This
such as plants and animals. With each state, known by the yogis as kaivalya, is the
incarnation, our consciousness has evolved, ultimate liberation from material existence.
and it is still evolving. Each lifetime brings new The soul has learned all the lessons it needs
lessons and insights. In each lifetime, we have to from its earthly experiences, and finally,
a special destiny to fulfil. has dropped its identification with body,
mind, and ego.
Karma is the basic thread that ties all our
incarnations together. It is also what binds us
to this world. It is possible to transcend one’s
karma and therefore break free of the cycle of

Evolution 49

Our karmic connections is brief, it is inevitable.
What is a karmic connection? It involves When you first meet someone, you will
anyone with whom you have had shared know there is karma between you and them
experiences in a past life and who has had because they will feel familiar. In some cases,
an impact on your consciousness. This you might feel that you had known or met this
impact may be positive or negative but is person before, or you might feel that you
usually strong and deep, and forms seeds know them now, even though you had only
of memories that remain dormant until spent a few minutes together. You may also
your next encounter with the person. The feel deeply touched by them. The encounter
connection then usually resumes where you might feel momentous, as if your life will
both left off. somehow be changed by it.

Every significant person in your life Sometimes, a parent and child will seem
represents a karmic connection. This is particularly close. It is interesting that they
difficult for some people to accept. But you may have been a married couple in a past life
usually have a karmic link with your parents, and decided to change their roles in order to
children, significant relatives and friends, learn new life lessons. Their closeness will
important teachers, and so on. You may also have an added element of endearment to it
have it with a business partner or a next-door (I am not implying an incestuous element).
neighbour. Not only do you have a karmic link Before we incarnate, we choose who we will
with them, but your connection continues to meet in our lifetime and our roles in relation to
evolve. Thus, you may be perpetuating karmic them, to maximize opportunities for growth.
trends started in a past life or perhaps
starting new ones in this lifetime. What is the point of our karmic connections?
We are all evolving together on this planet.
Sometimes you may even have a karmic The aim is to learn lessons that life has to
link with someone whom you just meet for a offer. We are also all mirrors for one another.
couple of moments or even pass by on a busy We reflect the best and worst aspects of each
street. You may just glance at one another for other. We grow through such reflections, or
a brief time. I have had the experience of being at least, they present us with opportunities
profoundly affected by such an encounter, for growth. It is up to us whether we want to
and I still think about it. The person and I expand our self-understanding or not. This is
weren’t meant to develop a relationship in often a function of the level of awareness we
this lifetime, but even such a brief encounter have.
was memorable.
Karma and problematic relationships
If you are sensitive to it, you will know when We walk along this road of life with a
you have a karmic connection with someone. certain group of people with whom we have
You may meet them while travelling on a plane experienced life before. People who present
or train and simply have a discussion on the conflicts or difficulties in our current
way to your destination. Or you may meet lifetime are often those with whom we have
them at a bar, club, or party, or they may be unfinished business to attend to. Unless we
introduced by a friend. These are not chance resolve our issues with them, we will likely
or random encounters. You were destined to meet them again in the next incarnation and
meet one another, and even if the encounter have to try once more to achieve resolution.

50 LifePositive | JUNE 2019


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