Chapter 1 - how strong is my love for you_

Ch#per 2 Wh#t goes on in my
he#d?

Well do you w#nt to know re#l
b#d? Ugh this is ok#y... I got this
lol
Well in my he#d I picture me ..
#nd you #nd # f#mily ofcourse #ll
the time .. #nd when your not
here I think of you still but very
sexu#lly #t times.. between me
#nd you just m#king love #nd
kissing slowly being inside you..
intertwined.. body full of
sens#tion th#t #re not from this
pl#net .. feeling of oneness.. of
become one .. of Becoming
something so much more th#n
you thought you could be... #nd if
Iʼm not thinking #bout th#t #nd
the w#y you look #t me ...the w#y
you m#ke me feel .. sometimes
the fe#rs get it in but hey we #ll
h#ve them right? .. right?.... you
#re definitely #m#zing b#by #nd
plz donʼt ch#nge ... when I see

you I see # f#mily .. my he#rt
be#ts f#st every time your
mentioned or c#ll or text like if
your #round me you would so
l#ugh lol but in #ll honesty my
fe#rs #re th#t... I m#y not be...
enough for you ... but th#tʼs
ok#y ... itʼs something I h#ve to
work on my self ofcourse #nd I
just w#nt to be there like for you ..
#nd I wonʼt get tired .. just would
love to know how much of me do
you w#nt ...
100% right? Hope so, but in my
he#d thereʼs more D#ily..
including e#ting .... lol not much
milksh#kes but more of how
m#ny c#lories I e#t #nd stuff like
th#t , I know you m#y not c#re
but Iʼll just spill i #ll out now
bec#use when Iʼm in the phone
with you I would tell you #ll this
but you wouldnʼt prob#bly be
like ... oh ... Ye#hh....mhm .. lm#o
I love you but yes then #fter th#t I
think #bout wh#t book I re#d or
finish re#ding .. honestly depends

on how I feel #t the moment , if
Iʼm s#d #nd helpless.. I try to find
# book th#t would m#ke me feel
comfort#ble with being #lone
#lmost To bring me b#ck to when
I w#s # kid no worries before
stress .. #nd I usu#lly try to switch
mood but when I get s#d itʼs kind
of weird like .. I get chills
sometimes.. like no one
underst#nds me.. but you do Iʼm
sure .. th#tʼs the thing.. only you
do.. your body mind #nd soul...
your he#rt.
And then i usu#lly try to write
down my feelings through music
or I get on the l#ptop #nd pull up
some softw#re #nd keybo#rd
controller #nd m#ke Melodys #nd
h#rmonies. Honestly #fter I write
music... I fucking cry.. bec#use I
feel like I just let out # ton but itʼs
when I find the perfect thing to
right th#t kills me.. #nd #ll the
feelings come in.. I get chills ..
te#rs f#ll but h#ppy bec#use I
know it he#ls #t the s#me time.

Music does. So when I he#rd you
pl#yed pi#no I fell in love
If Iʼm not s#d obviously im h#ppy
m#ybe bec#use either I just
worked out .. well depending
wh#t time .. I know you m#y think
my time is b#d but I worked on it
#nd i exercise 5 d#ys # week (but
I try to tell you just know if you
c#re ) I do 150 push-ups in the
morning or when I feel #ny type
of tiredness or neg#tive
thoughts .. my time is usu#lly 2
minutes to get it #ll done .. I try to
squeeze it in but oh god itʼs
excruci#ting.. but ye#h then I lift
to just more in the body weight
tr#ining ..#nd bre#thing but when
I do it I usu#lly put music on very
loud lol #nd zone out for 4min no
bre#k .. just let everything out...
#fter the song is over .. estoy
muerto. But th#t would be it #nd
th#t #lone isnʼt it then I switch
Other d#ys #nd do different
routines but b#sic#lly I found w
compound exercises #re good ..

s#ves time #nd very intense.
And if Iʼm not working out Iʼm ..
thinking #bout my go#ls, dre#ms.
Wh#t #re they you #sk? My
purpose?
Well my in my he#rt I feel my
purpose is to help people , now
ofcourse I study books on
fin#ncing #nd business ,
m#rketing re#lest#te, #nd Wh#t
not #nd my go#ls is to be
fin#nci#lly free to. It h#ve to
worry #bout money bec#use it I
see how it ch#nges people #nd I
donʼt c#re for it #s people do it
just p#per honestly. I just w#nt to
get th#t worry out of the w#y to
tr#vel to h#ve time for my f#mily
#nd wife to grow into something
unstopp#ble. So I know Iʼm
#m#zing #t spe#king to people
well like customer service wise
but I donʼt like working for #nyone
#nd you h#ve to #t points in life
but something in me feels like I
w#s born to do something #lone
like with no one controlling my

#ctions on my ide#s.
So I know th#t those things I
spoke of c#n help me be
fin#nci#lly free And i work on it
d#ily.
So my mind #t times is #ll over
the pl#ce
But you keep me grounded I tell
you..
So if Iʼm not thinking th#t of
Go#ls #nd wh#tnot then honestly
I think of new w#ys to love you..
to expl#in to you how I feel.. to
become # better m#n .. Husb#nd
for you . I love you Kristen
Fern#ndez. And th#tʼs #lw#ys
03/19/19