Five Quests Five Treasures

Five Quests
Five Treasures

The adventure of a life time
Every day

1

Boaz Zippor



Five Quests
Five Treasures

The adventure of a life time.
Every day.

Fight dragons,
Find treasures,
Create your adventures
Create yourself,

And create
Your
World.

3

Five Quests Five Treasures

Writer Boaz Zippor
Proofreader Pom Chotikuntanachai
Layout Paparwarin Sangpradab
Graphic Paparwarin Sangpradab
ISBN 978-616-7961-56-9

Published by Southeast Asian Ministers of Education Organization
Regional Centre for Sufficiency Economy Philosophy
for Sustainability (SAEMEO SEPS)

928 Natural and Environmental Building
Sukhumvit Road Phra Khanong Khlong Toei
Bangkok 10110

Website: www.seameo-seps.org
Email: [email protected]

Printed at VISTA INTER PRINT CO.,LTD.
428/181 Kanchanaphisek Road Dok Mai Prawet
Bangkok 10250
Tel. 02-015-4377

Foreword

In the 21st Century, we often hear the word “sustainabili-
ty” in everything around us. The word sustainability, sustainable
development and the UN Sustainable Development Goals are just
beautiful words or it is important in the daily life of the citizen in
the 21st century? How much do we understand sustainability? Do
we understand the same? Does individual sustainability have to
be the same?

It is internationally recognized that the Sufficiency Econ-
omy Philosophy (SEP) is a guideline for the development of hu-
man capital towards sustainable development. But how much do
we understand about sufficiency? We memorize the terms and
the three-ring chart, two conditions, or we understand the philos-
ophy of sufficiency economy and apply it in our daily life.

Most people want to change the world, want to change
the factors around us in order for the world to step into sustain-
ability. But how many people will start by changing themselves?
By understanding the principles of sufficiency, starts with setting
a new attitude, improves the way of thinking and changes their
own behavior; what we call “3H - Heart Head Hand” to create
balance from within and gradually expand the effect to people
around the family, at work, in the community and the society as
a whole.

The book, the 21st Century Citizen Manual: Sufficiency ...
Sustainability that the Southeast Asian Ministers of Education
Organization Regional Center for Sufficiency Economy Philosophy

for Sustainability (SEAMEO SEPS) together with the network has
organized to encourage the new generation, the world’s citizen in
the 21st century to turn attention to “Sustainability” and self-de-
velopment with the principle of “Sufficiency.”

This book is not full of teachings and does not contain
answers or formulas. On the contrary, this book series is filled
with inspirations and questions for readers to think, explore, and
learn from experience. Try to look at life from a new perspective,
finding your worth, life goal and a balanced lifestyle. Let’s play
with creativity, out-of-the-box thinking to create new innovations
for a sustainable society. Most importantly, to create happiness
for yourself and the surrounding society, which is an important
feature of the citizen in the 21st century “Sufficiency ... Sustain-
ability”.

THE DRAGONS

Dragons have three characteristics to them:
1. They are dangerous and frightening and can destroy and kill
you with one fling of the tail and flames shooting from their
mouth. They are the highest form of horrible monster that will
crush you and eat you up.
2. Dragons are what stands between you and the treasure,
between you and what you want, between you and what you love.
They are the main obstacle that is between you and success, in all
forms, success in career, success in friendships, success in family,
success in being who you can and want and should be.
3. Dragons are not real. They do not exist. The only place they
exist is your head, your imagination. think about it. Dragons are
the “worst case scenario” you imagine, magnified by a million.

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It is not real. If I say this thing people will not love me, if I do this
thing people will laugh at me, if I try I will fail, if I insist on doing
something and getting something people will think I am bad.
No. Most of the time all of these things will not happen. Yes, you
will fail, yes somethings will not go as planned, yes people will
think bad things about you and maybe even laugh at you. So? The
only place this is the “end of the world” is in your head ... Get used
to it.
Dragons are NOT real. So why be so scared of something that is
not real?

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THE PUZZLES

Everything in life is a game, if you want to look at it like that.
Every game has rules, every game has actions that will lead to
either a win or a loss, every game has steps you must pass, levels
you must go through, tasks to complete, enemies to conquer, rea-
sures to win.
The first thing you need to find out is the rules. Is it chess where
different pieces move in different ways? Is it soccer where the
whole team has to run from one side to the other? Is it golf that
you need to calculate the trajectory and distance to sink the ball in
the hole? Knowing the rules is getting you halfway there.
The second thing you need to find out is how to win. Losing is
easy, just do nothing. But winning is different, how do you get to
win? What do you need to do? Run faster? Aim better? Think in a
different way? Are you good enough to win clean so you don’t have
to cheat? Are you smart enough to know what shortcuts are good

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for you and what shortcuts just seem like the right thing but will
cause more problems and delays along the way?
The third and last thing is the puzzle itself. Once you look at it as
a puzzle it is already ‘interesting’, and we all know that interesting
means more fun. It is not some boring thing you have to work hard
at and suffer until you get to see some treasure. No, it is a puzzle,
a challenge, a real part of your quest. Enjoy the puzzle and you
already won.
Enjoy the puzzle and the treasure will show itself when the time is
right, just waiting for you to pick it.

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THE TREASURES

What is the treasure you seek? Do you know? What do you think it
is? The treasure changes, it depends on who you are, what you are,
what you do or want to do and what your position in life is.
The treasure can be a skill you got. You worked hard fighting drag-
ons and solving puzzles and now you have a skill you did not have
before, you know how to work a certain program, you know how
to play a musical instrument, you know how to do accounting for
your new business, you know how to communicate better with
people to get the best results – these are all real treasures.
The treasure can be real treasure, I want to be able to buy a house,
a new car, eat in nice restaurants and go on nice vacations on an
island resort. I want a bigger office and a better title for my job.
These are all simple treasures but real treasures.

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It changes as you move through the game called life, when you are
younger you look for a certain type of treasure, as you mature you
will look for others. When you are thirty your career will hold most
of the treasures you seek but when you are forty you will find that
the treasures are more in your family life.
When you are young you will find treasures in the form of having
good things, when you get older you will understand that treasure
is in having good friends. It changes. It does not mean that one
treasure is better than the other, they are all good, they are all
right and you should and can fight the dragons and the puzzles to
get them. All of them. It is up to you. You just need to understand
the value of achieving your goals and to celebrate the treasures
you manage to get and manage to keep.

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Intro The adventure begins, life IS the adventure.

A game.

There are rules, there are fights, there are
puzzles, there are dragons guarding the treasure,
but there is, and that is the important thing –
those treasures waiting for you.

A series of different treasures that if you manage

to collect all, you will have the best chances to

end up with a full healthy prosperous productive

joyful life.

Quest #1 Finding the treasure that is YOU

The dragons - What people think of you, what you think of your

self, what you believe you can or cannot, what

you fear, what your greed is.

The puzzles - Find out what makes you tick. What you like,

what you dislike and why.

Find out what makes you happy and how you can

use it in real life.

Find out what society expects from you, and what

you expect from yourself.

The treasure - Know thyself – once you understand how your

mind and heart work, you can direct yourself

better and with more confidence in your true

path.

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Quest #2 Finding the treasure that is FRIENDSHIP

The dragons - Society rules, closed cliques, other people, self-

made walls, communication problems, different

expectations, trust issues.

How to handle peer pressure? Bullying? Broken

friendships? Broken hearts?

The puzzles - How to find a common ground, how to establish

trust, how to form connections. One on one inter

action compared to group interactions. How to

keep yourself true and individual as part of a

group.

The treasure - Support on your way, company to celebrate or

mourn with, safety in numbers, sense of

belonging, lifelong loyalty, exchange of ideas,

help in every way.

Quest #3 Finding the treasure that is CAREER

The dragons - What do you want to do? What can you do? What
will they allow you to do?
Can you make a living out of what you love? Are
you worth all that pay?

The puzzles - Find out what is your goal in life, what is your
purpose, what is your calling.
How can you get what you want? Get the right
position, the right job?
What is the difference between working for
others and work for yourself

The treasure - Interesting career that fulfills you and makes you
happy to go to work, financial gains and respect, a
better position in life, getting to your goals in the
most effective way without forgetting who you
are and with the minimum possible sacrifice.

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Quest #4 Finding the treasure that is FAMILY

The dragons - Living with strange people, obeying elder’s rules,

challenging or accepting elders’ advice, sibling

rivalries, problem with parent relationships, your

position in the family, strict expectations and

other people’s dreams and goals.

The puzzles - What really is family? Is it blood? Is it love and

loyalty?

What is my part in the family structure and

mechanism?

What can I learn and get from family, what can I

give to family?

The treasure - A real home, where you belong, and have good

relationships with your parents, brothers and

sisters and the rest of the extended family, to

augment every joy, to sooth every sorrow, to go

together through rain or shine, with endless love

and support from the day of your birth to the day

of your death.

Quest #5 Finding the treasure that is SOCIETY

The dragons - So many rules, so many different people, so much

is changing all the time and so many people are

not keen on playing by the rules, and do not have

society’s best in heart. How do you handle the

less comfortable parts of being in a society?

The puzzles - Find out what are the basic rules. Seek the good
people to help you on the way. Think of the big
ger picture and the bigger goal and then what is
your place in that picture and how can you assist
on the way to the goal.

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The treasure - Working healthy society is the key to any kind

of real progress and prosperity. By being a useful

and productive part of society you are not only

making an impact but also serving as positive

example to people around you.

Bonus Finding the treasure that is BLISS

The dragons - Everybody wants you to be something, everybody

needs you to be something, do you know who you

are? What is your goal? What can you do?

The puzzles - Find out the magic component, that ‘added value’

that living a fulfilled truthful life can bring you.

Solve the big mystery of your place in the uni

verse and what is your contribution to the world

around you.
The treasure - A peaceful mind, a mindful life, a real life worth

living.

Conclusion Tips and cheat codes for the game, sage advice
and a blessing as you start the great adventure
which is life, as you take on roads unknown and
future uncertain, with your head held high, shoul
ders back, a head full of tools to build with and a
heart which knows what to do.

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QUEST #1

Finding the treasure that is YOU

1.1 Selling a chair

Let’s say you want to sell a chair you have. It is not a new chair. It
is not the best chair there is. It is not the most comfortable chair
there is. It is not the most beautiful chair there is.
But you still want, or more accurately you need to sell this chair.
Now, you can go out of the house and stand by your door and shout
“chair for sale! I have a chair for sale!”. Somebody might be passing
by and hear you and come to see the chair. They will look, see a
simple old chair and say no thank you. Yes, maybe you are lucky
and maybe someone will see the chair and buy it, but the chances
are not high.

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If you want to be smart, you take a bit of sand paper, and you
take off the old paint from the chair, and you clean it nice, and
you put a nice new cover of paint on the chair and you take a rag
with some fine oil and rub the chair and polish it until it is shiny
and beautiful.

Is there a better chance to sell that chair? Of course there is. It
is the difference between night and day. You are on your way to
success already.

And if you want to be smart you don’t stand by your door and
shout “chair for sale” but you take the chair and you go to a better
place, maybe a market where chairs are sold. People who look for
chairs will come to that place to buy their new chair, maybe they
will see your chair and love it and buy it. Or even better, you find
out who needs a chair or wants a chair and you go to them, and
tell them you have the chair they need and the chair they want.

Will your chances to sell that chair be higher? Of course, they will.
Yes, it takes a little bit of energy. You might spend half a day
painting and polishing, you might get sweaty and a little dirty, you
might get a little tired carrying that chair to the place where peo-
ple need it, it all takes a little effort. But that is exactly life – you
get what you put in. This is a very simple example, right? Easy to
understand.

So let’s say that instead of the chair, what you need to “Sell” to the
world is you. Yes, you. You need to sell you because the people who
“buy” you will be your friends, the people who “buy” you will offer
you a great job. The people who “buy” you will want to do business
with you and help you earn a lot of money.

Doesn’t it just make sense to take that “you” that you need to sell,
strip off the old ugly paint, clean “you”, paint “you” in a better
quality and more beautiful paint and then spend a little time to

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polish “you” until you are shiny and attractive.

This does not mean that you have to be beautiful, that you have
to diet yourself to death and that you have to put on makeup or
go spend fortunes on plastic surgery. These are all very superficial
things, that yes, will help you be more “attractive” to some, but
are not meaningful, not lasting and not significant to your real life.

If on the other hand you make yourself, let’s see, maybe hard
working? Someone people know will “do the job”…Honest? Some-
one people could trust, with their work, with their money, with
their careers, with their life … How about just being Cooperative
and being able to work with others? We all know team work gets
the best results in the end. Pleasant? that is a big plus in selling
“you”.

Do people want to be around you, do you send out positive energy
or negative one? Do you make people happy, make them smile?
People love that. They will buy a “you” that makes them feel good.
Do you support people? Do you help them in their work and life?
Do you make them feel good about who they are, what they are,
what they do? Everybody knows people like that, and everybody
knows people who are the opposite, student friends who like to
bring everybody down, co-workers who are negative and bitter and
doubt everything and tell you all the reasons why the project will
fail and you will fail and everything will fail because everything is
horrible and the system is against you and and and… who wants to
be near people like that? Who will “buy” them and their attitude?

1.2 Lean on your strengths

I once heard a very good advice – build on your strengths. We
cannot all be good at all things we do. It is a fact. We are different
people and we have different talents and different skills. We offer

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different things to the world. To people around us. To our job and
career.

It is natural, it is not something that we should feel bad about and
something we should feel guilty for. There will be a lot of things
we are just not good at. What are they? For you? What is your best
point, and what are the weakest points?

Just think how basic this is – if you know what your best part is
and what is your least efficient part, if you just know what it is,
you are already on the road to success. If you take a job that asks
for some things you are not good at, because it sounds like a real-
ly good job, or the pay is good, or the title of the position sounds
respectable, you have a good chance of failing. Because the things
needed are not the things you are good at.

If on the other hand you find a career path that embraces and
needs your natural talent and abilities, chances are that you will
shine there and then will get the good pay, the respectable title
etc. And of course, you will be happier and more relaxed because
you will be going with your real self, you will not have to pretend,
you will not have to work hard to be something you are not, some-
thing that you probably don’t even want to be but you think you
want to be.

But, you might say, I do not have any strength. I am just normal. I
am not very beautiful, I am not the smartest in my class, I am not
a hard worker, I am not very driven to success or to money. I am
just another person in the world. I am normal. I am not “special”.
That is a lie. You are a liar. You don’t lie to me, you lie to yourself.
It is a lie that is used as an excuse. Why would you want to lie to
yourself? And why would you want to use a lie like this to block
yourself from being successful.

First rule of getting on the road to win your quest. Don’t lie. To
anyone. Especially not to yourself.

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Everyone has something special. Everyone is something special.
Maybe you don’t see it now, maybe you don’t understand it or
don’t understand who you can be, what you can be. It is not a sin.

Not understanding is the first step to learning and learning will
always make you better. So forgive yourself for not understanding
how you can be better and special but never forgive yourself for
lying to yourself telling yourself you don’t have anything of value
to offer to the world. THAT is unforgivable.

Maybe you don’t see it now, but the word “now” is the key. An
important part of your quest is to find out your “special” thing. It
can be anything. You might not be a genius but you are very good
with people. You might not be the best in your field but you are re-
liable and people want to work with you. You might not be the best
conversationalist but you make people feel good about themselves
so they want to be near you and want you to be near them. You
might not be the best worker but you are the best son, daughter,
husband, wife, parent that you can be.

Special doesn’t mean the best, it doesn’t mean the prettiest. It
means unique, even in a small way, it means being remembered,
leaving a mark on anyone you meet, on anyone you interact with,
anyone you work with or for.

Special is not the opposite of normal. Being normal can be special
too. I worked with many crazy people who were very far from
normal. They were fun to work with and I learnt a lot, but most
of them were only successful thanks to the normal people who
worked with them, because normal is important. Normal gets
things done. Normal is persistent, faithful, and trustworthy. Nor-
mal is not bad. Normal is what makes the whole world run. Do you
have any idea how special it is to be normal?

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1.3 Build yourself up

We all come to this world knowing nothing. We are bald, have
no teeth, cannot stand or walk and cannot talk and say what we
need and want. We start from (almost) zero. And look at yourself
now, isn’t that a miracle? You know so much already, you can do
so much already, you can communicate, you can build things, you
can think and make decisions. All these things? You learnt. Some
by yourself, and some you were taught by others, but remember,
everything you know now you did not know before. Everything
you can do now you could not do before.

It is amazing. But it is also the most normal thing in the world. We
learn. All the time. Sometimes we learn a lot in a very short time,
like when you were a baby and a small child. Sometimes we put a
lot of energy and effort and dedicate time to learn, like when you
were growing up and went to school, sometimes we learn very
slow and have to repeat the lesson many times until you get it, like
any adult will tell you.

If you can learn something, you can learn anything. If you can
learn something, you are worth more, you can do more, you can
be more effective and efficient and can contribute more, to your
family, to your friends, to society.

Everything you learn really does make you better. Everything you
learn brings new opportunities and possibilities, opens new doors.
A new skill can get you a better job, a new language can open new
horizons, even a new sport opens up a new world of friends and
connections.

It doesn’t matter what it Is you learn, as long as you keep learning.
You are building yourself, and building yourself up, to be better
and have a better life.

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A lot of people are just lazy, or find the excuses why not to learn.
I am busy, I don’t have the time, I don’t have the money, I am not
a good student, I am not smart enough, I am not talented enough.

It always amazes me how the thing most people learn to do best
is make excuses. So don’t. just do it, just learn, something new.
Anything new. Start small. Something that you like to do anyway
or something that interests you, go online, read about it, watch
some videos, some lessons, tutorials. You don’t have to be a big
master at it, just start. And then a little more. And a little more.
And in the years you will find you are really good at it and it will
surprise you, because you will forget the work put into it, as it
was really fun.

Whenever I hear someone say “I am bored” I ask them “what
new thing would you like to know how to do?” and they are al-
ways shocked. Learn? But I am bored, I don’t want to learn, I
want to have fun. Learning is for school. It is not fun. That is one
big dragon right there. The idea that learning is for school and
is not fun. Nothing can be further than the truth. And the best
thing? There is no “fail” in learning something new, there is just
“wait and keep working on it”.

1.4 Ask questions

Do you think you know yourself? Really? Stop and think for a
minute. Try to think what is it that makes you YOU. You can
write it down. What do you like? What don’t you like? Why do
you like what you like? Why don’t you like what you like? What
can you do realy good? Why can you do that really good? What
do you want? What do you want to be?

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Make a list of all these questions. Every time you have a minute,
when you are waiting for the train, waiting for a class to start, sit-
ting at home bored, waiting to fall asleep… every time you have a
minute ask yourself one question from the list.

But there is one condition. Don’t lie. Not to yourself. After you an-
swer the question, ask yourself, is this really the answer. I know,
it sounds strange, but never trust yourself without checking twice.
If you are sure? That is good, then you can trust your answer and
trust the decisions you make, but remember, the worst dragons?
They come in form of lies, lies to yourself. Be careful of those drag-
ons. Fight them, destroy them, kill the lies and celebrate the truth
you found.

Never stop asking. Never. It does not take much energy, it does not
take much time, and the result, the treasure you get in the end?
Truly priceless, by asking and checking you hold your truth firm,
and your truth is like a map, if you follow it, you will get to where
you need and want to go.

1.5 The sustainable you

When you think about you, about what you want to be, what you
can be, what you want to do, you must always remember that you
are not living in a vacuum, and you are not alone. Most of our life
is spent in connection and interaction with others. We are, if we
want to or not, part a bigger organism, a living system.

When we plan, when we dream, when we start our path in life, we
must remember that everything is connected, every single thing
affects every other thing, every person affects every other person,
so when you work on building yourself, just keep an eye about
what is going on around you, in your inner circles, but also around
it, your neighborhood, your whole school, your city, your country.
A country, or a city, is a sustainable thing, that works because all

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parts work in a way that makes it survive and grow, and so should
you.

The sustainable you, is a puzzle that you build, like a machine
made of life decisions and actions, that is always changing to be
the best machine it can be, that will work better, that will be more
efficient, in life, in friendships, in relationships, in the career, that
will be truly sustainable on its own in the great big picture.

1.6 Sufficiency and satisfaction

What do you really want to be? But I mean really? Most people
have a dream so big that it is frightening, and that calls the drag-
ons. We would like to avoid that if possible, if you want to move
forward smoothly and with joy.

What do you really want to be? The most important architect in
the world? The most famous actress? Noble prize winner scientist?
The richest businesswoman? Yeah, sure, that is all fun, and you
know what, there is nothing bad about it. Dream big. Aim high.

But remember that if you aim your bow too high, what will hap-
pen? The arrow goes straight up and falls back down on you. Yeah,
we might try to avoid that too if possible.

How about, instead of being the most important artist of the 21st
century, you can be “just” a really good artist? Maybe you will not
be the world best architect, but I think it will be really cool if you
become a really good architect and enjoy your work and your life.
Maybe you will not be a famous international superstar singing
on stages around the world, but that sounds like a big headache if
you ask me. Aiming to be a really good singer should be enough.
Because if you are really good, success will come.

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Maybe instead of dreaming about having the biggest house on the
beach front, it is more healthy to dream of having a really nice
house, comfortable and warm, where you have a real home and
can live a happy satisfied life.
I am not saying, in any way, not to dream big. If it is really want
to do, and be. If you have an Olympiad gold medal winner in you,
it will show and it will happen. If you really were meant to be a
big star, it would happen, or maybe not. Who knows? Think of
what you really want, what will really make you happy. Make you
satisfied. I think you will be surprised, I think that after the first
minute, when it really is fun fantasizing and dreaming about what
can be, when you start looking at the details, you will find you
need very little to be very happy, that you need simple things that
really count instead of a lot of things that don’t.
Less is more? Not always, but when you are full, stop eating. And
that works in most aspects of your life. Being satisfied is one of
the biggest blessings you can get, a real treasure, as it comes with
a sort of internal peace that is hard to describe in words. A real
treasure.

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You are important

Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. And the more you grow and
be a positive and productive you,
the more you will be important.

You are what you do

You create yourself every minute every hour every day. Control
what you think what you say and what you do and you will get
the best you that you can be in return.

You decide what you are

Don’t let anyone paint your path for you, you are in charge, you
are the captain of your ship, the artist that paints the master-
piece that is you.

The best you will always be the sustainable you

When you find your true real path, and how to build a healthy
and productive. You, the best results will manifest themselves
and show themselves to you.

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Quest #1 Finding the treasure that is YOU

The dragons - What people think of you, what you think of
yourself, what you believe you can or cannot,
what you fear, what your greed is.

The puzzles - Find out what makes you tick. What you like,
what you dislike and why.
Find out what makes you happy and how you
can use it in real life.
Find out what society expects from you, and
what you expect from yourself.

The treasure - Know thyself – once you understand how
your mind and heart work, you can direct
yourself better and with more confidence in
your true path.

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QUEST #2

Finding the treasure that is FRIENDSHIP

2.1 Why we need friends

We only need friends if we want to live a happy and full life. If you
are content with just happy and not full, you can do that alone.
Some people will tell you that this option is even better. Who
needs friends? Who needs people around you all the time? Talking
to you, arguing with you, annoying you, disturbing you, wasting
your time. Do everything alone.
Yes, a lot of people really do believe that. These people are in two
groups – people who don’t understand life and people who were
hurt by their friends in the past. Maybe by reading this book you

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will understand life a little better, at least we hope so, but it is
more important to talk about the second group.

Your friends will hurt you. Sometime. They will. The sooner you
learn to live with this fact, the happier you will be. Your friends
will hurt you. Sometimes. And sometimes your friends will bring
you incredible joy, and sometimes your friends will be there to
support you when you are down and feeling bad, and sometimes
your friends will help you if you are stuck without money or need
to move a heavy couch.

Because this is life. This is friendship. Nobody is perfect. Everybody
makes mistakes. Think back, did you ever hurt someone? Without
meaning it, without wanting to hurt them? Of course you did. You
are not Buddha and not Jesus. You are human.

So once you understand that your friends are human too, you will
not be excited if sometimes they do or say something that hurts
you. Just keep the ones who are sorry when they do, do not do it
on purpose, and try to learn and never do it again.

So, now that we passed this point, let’s talk about the good things
friendship brings.

The first is support. It can be an advice or actual help doing some-
thing you need to do, but it can also be just being there. Yes, just
being near you, with you, for you. Knowing someone is on your
side. Knowing you have someone to call if you need anything, if
you want anything, or just to talk and pass the time, that is great
support too.

One of the tests I give myself when I want to know who are my
real friends is the “three three” rule. It is three o’clock in the morn-
ing, and your car or motorcycle breaks down three km out of town.

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Who do you call? Who can you wake up at three in the morning to
come pick you up out of town or help you fix the car? You will see
the list is very short. You might have a hundred “friends” but only
a handful will do that. For you. They will do that for you. Because
it is you. Because they are your friends.

The second test is the “good news bad news” test. Who are the
first people you want to share news with? It can be good news,
you just got a new job, you bought a new car, you found the love of
your life, who is the person you call first to share this experience?
And it can be bad news, you might have just lost your job, someone
close to you is in the hospital, something bad happened to you,
who is the first people you call to share that? And believe me this
is the important one, everyone likes to hear good news and good
stories but it is your real friends who listen when you have bad
news to tell, and it is these people that you feel you need to call
when it happens.

You can also use that in the other direction, who of the people
you know want to share news with you? They are probably your
friends. It is a two way street. Look for it, understand it, and trea-
sure these people.



2.2 Do friends need us?

One of the most important thing for a human being to be happy is
the feeling they are needed. It is great to be wanted, but needed is
more important.

Are you there for your friends when they need you? It is easy to
be with someone who is happy and makes you laugh, but can you
be with them when they are sad and depressed? Can you give a
shoulder to cry on, a warm hug when they feel lost and lonely? Can

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you try and help or give advice when they need someone? If you
learn how to do that, you will find you have much better friends
and more of them.

We all need someone sometime. Understand that and you already
found a treasure. Your friends are just like you, human just like
you, they love like you, they work like you, they play like you, and
they need the same things you need.

Knowing you need friends is nice, but understanding your friends
need you is wonderful. You are needed. You are important. They
don’t want to share the news they just got with just anyone, they
want to share it with you. You. Yes, you. Why? Because you are
special. To them. Really special.

2.3 Together we stand, divided we fall

There is power in numbers. We all know that. A group of people
can do more than just one person. Now, this rule is for society at
large, but it is also for a small group, like friends.

We are stronger when there is someone near us, with us, for us,
we are better when we have people around us to see what we do,
to help us do, to talk to, to exchange ideas, to exchange plans and
talk about what you want to do, what you want to be.

You might be the smartest person in town but you will still benefit
a lot from having others around you, and you will probably also
learn a lot of things you did not even know you needed or wanted
to know.

But how do we get the together? How do we unite? Well, you
start with one person, and then another and then another. Friend-

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ship is the cornerstone of building a society. And also other things,
for example, the best long lasting fruitful and happy marriages
or relationships happen when you find someone who is not only
your lover but your best friend. Doesn’t that sound like something
amazing? Spending the rest of your life with your best friend?

2.4 Next level friendship

If you are lucky, and if you are smart, and if you work really really
really hard on it, you might get a bonus round on friendship. You
already managed to get some nice people to be your friends, you
might even found one or two that are very close to you. But there
is another level above that. Way above.

There are times, and there are people, who send you higher and
make you better because they stop being just friends and become
something more. Like family, but even better because you chose
them and they chose you.

You want to know the secret of how to get to this level? So do I. No
one knows. It might be luck, it might be fate or destiny, it might be
past lives, I really don’t know. What I do know is that you have to
work hard at the lower levels before you get to that bonus round.
And if you are lucky and you got there? Hold on to it like your life
depend on it. Be that friend-family to that person, make sure they
know how important they are to you, see what you can do for
them, support them, help them. Trust me, this is one treasure that
you never ever ever ever want to lose.

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2.5 The sustainable friendship

A friendship is by definition a positive thing. It is not just know-
ing someone, it is being connected, being part of a larger group, a
larger living system. And like any eco system friendship is fragile
and should be kept safe, nurtured, clean, and efficient enough to
survive.

It means cleaning it from poisons and pollution, either by com-
municating and explaining to friends what you find toxic in the
relationship and work on it, or by finding different friends. Usually
long term friendships take quite a bit of time to eliminate all the
bugs, smooth the corners and get on the tracks, but it is worth it
in the long run.

Sustainable in the relationship quest is making sure every friend is
treated well, treats you well, brings positive energy when he cans.
Help each other when he cans, and helps the system not only sur-
vive but thrive and grow.

You need to protect friendships, and you need to water and nur-
ture them. When you do those two things, the result will always
be a sustainable friendship, that drives you forward, that picks you
up, and that most important, survives for many years. You will be
surprised how long life gets, and having good friends through all
of that is wonderful and necessary.

2.6 Sufficiency and satisfaction

How many friends do you want? How many friends do you need?
It sounds like a strange question, doesn’t it, but it really is some-
thing that you need to think about. Some people can have two or
three good friends throughout their life, and some people need to

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have more connections, more groups, more contacts. Having many
friends can be also counted as a status symbol. Oh everybody loves
him/ her. If you really want a lot of friends, you will probably have
them.

If you don’t really want it but some dragon is whispering in your
head that you need to have a lot of friends to feel good with your-
self, you might find the task more grueling. Having a lot of friends
does not necessarily say a lot about you. Having few good friends
does. Pick wisely. A true friendship is a treasure that just grows
and grows every year. It is the best investment anyone can make.

Friendship is part of who you are

You decide who you are, but also who you are with. The people you
spend your time with, that you share your life with, become part
of who you really are.

Friendships help you grow

A good friendship is like a sail on the boat of your life, it will help
you get in the right direction and to move forward along your cho-
sen path.

Friendships help you survive

Friendships bring comfort, bring strength, bring fun. Not only do
you want these things in your life, you need them to survive and
have the best life you can have.

The best friendships are the sustainable ones

Friendship is not a one-way street, it is alive, it is changing, it is
evolving. The more you think about how to make your friendship
work for everyone involved, you, your friends, society, the world,
the stronger will be your friendship and the longer it will last.

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Quest #2 Finding the treasure that is FRIENDSHIP

The dragons - Society rules, closed cliques, other people, self-
made walls, communication problems, different
expectations, trust issues.
How to handle peer pressure? Bullying? Broken
friendships?
Broken hearts?

The puzzles - How to find a common ground, how to establish
trust, how to form connections. One on one interac-
tion compared to group interactions. How to keep
yourself true and individual as part of a group.

The treasure - Support on your way, company to celebrate or
mourn with, safety in numbers, sense of belonging,
lifelong loyalty, exchange of ideas, help in every

way.

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QUEST #3

Finding the treasure that is CAREER

3.1 The rest of your life

First thing we need to do is understand the difference between a
job and a career. A job is something you do to get money, some-
thing you do to pay the bills, buy in the supermarket, go eat out
and have fun, and maybe even save a little for the future. Millions
of people have jobs. Some jobs are good, some are less, some jobs
are interesting, some are less, some jobs pay a lot, some jobs less.
A career is a path, a road you chose to follow, to walk in, to prog-
ress in, to get somewhere, to build something, to be something.
A career is a living thing that responds to you, to what you do, to
what you choose, to what you invest and put in it.

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A good career corresponds to your calling, your vocation, the thing
you were meant to do, or the things you are naturally talented in.
A career, a good career, is something that becomes an important
part of who you are and what you are.

Most jobs are temporary, because they depend on outside circum-
stances and outside influences, where you are, what options you
have at the moment, what is easy and comfortable and a lot of
times it is something you “fall” into, without thinking too much. A
friend tells you there is an opening in the company he works for,
you see an ad in the newspaper or a sign near your house saying
there is work.

A good career is a long term commitment because it evolves with
time, it grows with you, or you grow with it, it is not something
fixed, it is like a river, it flows and it curves and it goes places you
might not expect.

It is wise to think of your chosen career as a marriage of sorts. A
job is dating someone for fun, or for momentary benefits, but a
career is a life partner, a long term partner. So choose it well. Yes,
some people change careers in the middle of their life, but some
people also change life partners in the middle of their life. If there
is a good enough reason to do so, it is not a bad thing.

3.2 Doing and doing and being

What is the difference between doing and being? Isn’t everything
we do part of who we are, of who and what we chose to be? It is
indeed a complicated question.

When talking about careers and jobs, the difference is that in a job
you do what you are told to do, or do what you know needs to be

38

done right now. It is often very clear and can be seen in your sim-
ple job description. In a career a lot of the things you do are more
long term and more elusive, you don’t just do what needs to be
done right now, you do things that will benefit you in the future,
and sometimes this things seem like they are not urgent or not
part of your job description. In a career you do not for the immedi-
ate gain but in order to build a future. In fact a lot of things done
for your career will not only not bring you money, but will cost you
money. But you have to do them so you can get more money in the
future, so you can build stone on stone, build a skill set, build a
name, a reputation, a client base.

In a good career path, you do in order to be, not do in order to do.
What do you want to be? What do you need to do in order to be
that? Find out the answer and your path is clear to success. With
the right path and a right movement forward to build something
new, success will not be denied from you. You are in charge, you
build what you will have, you will enjoy the fruits of your labour.
Do. Do some more. Do to be.

3.3 Work for free but never work for free

How can you work for free but not work for free? That sounds cra-
zy or just stupid. Either you work and get paid or you work for free,
right? Wrong. Try to figure out, in the very early stages of your
work or career life, what you want to achieve, where you want to
go, what you want to be.

When you figured out these answers, you will see that money is
the least important thing to worry about. Money is now. Your life
is out there, in the future. Yes, you need to pay the rent, and you
have debts to pay back, and you want nicer clothes and a better
apartment and car, but if you think long term you might find that

39

doing something for “free” today, will multiply your income next
year, so suddenly instead of paying off debts for ten years you
will need only two years. Instead of saving small change for thirty
years to buy a new apartment, maybe doing a free project today
will bring you two bigger clients next year and suddenly you live in
the house of your dreams without even noticing how it happened.

Work for the future, even if it is sometimes for free, but never
work for free, meaning for nothing. A lot of people will ask you
to work for free, especially at the beginning of your life quest and
road. It is probably wise to say no to most of them. Most of them.
Not all of them. Look at the big picture, look at the hidden poten-
tial benefits of what you are asked to do today. If it is worth it, if it
might bring you good results, if it is part of what you need to do for
your career advancement, it is not working for free.

From my experience it is also sometimes useful to explain it to the
people you do the so-called free work for. I am doing this because
I believe and hope that it will bring xyz in the future, and I hope
you can appreciate it. You will be surprised but a lot of clients and
companies you do so-called free work for, appreciate this honesty
and value your planning and long sight and will even help you get
to these goals in the future if they can. Sometimes people can be
good and help you when you help them. Not all times, maybe not
even most times, but when it happens? It can give an unbelievable
boost to your career.

A wise businessman once said – when I go to a networking event
and meet other businessmen I never ask them how their business
can help me, I ask how can I be of help to their business. That
usually surprise people and they will immediately have a positive
view of you and your work, and that is how you get higher in the
business world, with support, with help, with collaboration, with
connections and contacts.

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3.4 Grow grow grow and grow some more

There is nothing more magical than growth. Personal growth,
growth in your career, growth in your business, growth in your
network, in your circle of friends and co-workers, your clients,
your world.

How do you grow in your life and career? Same way you grow your
garden. You work on it, you water it every day, you put fertiliz-
er, you trim away the dead leaves and branches making sure the
healthy ones have space and room and all the optimal conditions
to grow.

How do you grow in your life and career? You learn new things,
new skills, new points of view, new methods of doing things,
new ways to communicate and to collaborate. Learning is growth.
Learning is pure gain, no one ever lost anything by learning some-
thing.

3.5 The sustainable career

When it comes to career, the word sustainable really comes to
mind when thinking about the difference between success and
failure, between living a happy life or wasting a life, between a
balanced and healthy future and a grim one.

There are two ways you have to create a sustainable path in your
career. The first is the career itself and how it grows and develops,
how you progress and advance, rise up and build. And the second
aspect is being sustainable as part of your life. It is very easy to get
lost in a career and lose that kind of sustainable thinking. If you
are down you will work harder and your life can suffer, if you are
up you will want to work more to go even higher and your life can
suffer.

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Look out for those two aspects, find the right path for you and
your career and understand that friends family and fun are also
an extremely important part of life, and no career is worth living
without them, and if you forget that the end result is always less
than sweet.

3.6 Sufficiency and satisfaction

Being satisfied in general is a pretty nice thing, but being satisfied
in your career is even extra special as it is your, it is something you
are building, that you have built, something that you can and are
allowed to be proud of. A real treasure, and this time even bigger.
But how do you know when you are satisfied? How can you tell?
You will know. If you have a sustainable career, you will see it com-
ing, it will be part of the path. And once again I will ask you, to ask
yourself, what is your path, what is your destination. You know, all
those questions, but this time when you look at your answers see if
you can find at what point you start feeling that happiness we all
wait for, work hard for. That will be your mark. Your sweet spot.
Aim there and you will be in the right direction.

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Career is where you will spend most of your life

You will spend one third of your life, at least, in your career, and in
many cases it will be half of your life or even more. Choose wisely
where do you want to spend your future.

Your career will change you

You grow because of what you do, you change because of what you
do. If you spend a third of your life doing things in your career, it
will change you. Embrace that change and make sure it is a change
in the right direction.

Your career is a living thing

A career is not a lake, it is a river, something that is ever flowing,
ever changing, ever evolving. Treat it as a living organism and you
will get the best out of it. Treat it like a garden, water it, nurture it,
clean it, work on it, and it will grow into something that will make
your life better.

The best careers are the sustainable ones

Careers are tricky, they will suck you in and they will make you
blind to the rest of what you are, if you are not careful. Be aware of
what you do, what you choose, what you decide, and keep yourself
healthy by making the sustainable decisions, building a sustain-
able career that is part of a sustainable life.

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Quest #3 Finding the treasure that is CAREER

The dragons - What do you want to do? What can you do?
What will they allow you to do? Can you make
a living out of what you love? Are you worth all
that pay?

The puzzles - Find out what is your goal in life, what is your
purpose, what is your calling. How can you get
what you want? Get the right position, the right
job? What is the difference between working for
others and work for yourself?

The treasure - Interesting career that fulfills you and makes
you happy to go to work, financial gains and
respect, a better position in life, getting to your
goals in the most effective way without
forgetting who you are and with the minimum
possible sacrifice.

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QUEST #4

Finding the treasure that is FAMILY

4.1 The secret for a good life

Families are annoying. You know it. They really are. They will give
you such a headache, and they will take so much of your energy
and time, and they will frustrate you and sometimes even break
your heart. But all of this means absolutely nothing compared to
the good things families bring. Just ask someone who does not
have any…
When you live long enough, some of the elders of your family will
die and it is only then that you really realize how much you miss
then annoying you. And then you will really understand how im-

45

portant they were to you. Please, don’t make the mistake of wait-
ing that long to understand it.

But why is the family quest, the quest for a good life? Your life is
so much more than just the family, you have friends, you have
hobbies, you have your job, you have your personal projects, family
is just one thing in the long list of things that make your life. But
it is the main thing. It is the base on which everything else will
be built, the foundations of everything that you can do in life, the
ground where you sow the seeds of your success and your achieve-
ments.

We all have three families. The family we were born in, the family
we make with our spouse and children and the unofficial family
of friends we find along the way. All three should be treated as
treasures to keep, but here we will talk only about the biological
family, the one you were thrown into without choosing them, and
the one that you chose and made yourself when you grow up.

The family you were born into are the only ones who will love you
unconditionally, at least in decent families. You can be less than
attractive, you can fail in most of your school tests, you might even
not be a big success in your job, but it does not matter. This is your
family, you belong to them, they belong to you, and the bond and
love is beyond simple facts and every day mundane affairs.

The quest of the family, is how to make your relationship with your
family members and successful one, a positive one, a productive
one, a healthy one. We all have relatives that are problematic, that
are not simple, that have their own defects and make mistakes
and behave badly. Yes, just like you. Your quest? To make it work.
To forgive when necessary, to help improve when you can, to be
part of the tribe, of the household, of the fabric of family.

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Having good family life is half the way to having a good life in
general. The longer you live in this world, the more you will under-
stand how this is one of the basic truths of this world.

4.2 Blood is thicker than water

Yes, sometimes our friends become family. Sometimes we really
do see them as brothers and sisters, or if they are older friends
as uncles and aunts. And sometimes we are right. Let us never
underestimate these kinds of families, these kinds of connections,
this kind of love.

But it is not blood family. Friends come and go. Very few stay
throughout your life, very few are worth it and most of the time
even the good ones drift away because of life, because of career
schedules, because you move to another city, a million reasons.

You will never lose contact with your mother or your brother be-
cause you moved to a new city or even a new country, you will
probably make time for that phone call, that email, that video chat,
no matter how tired you are after a long day at work, no matter
how busy you are, no matter how far you are.

Chances are that when you get old and have your own family you
will indeed find yourself complaining that your children don’t call
enough, and don’t visit enough and are busy all the time, just like
your parents say now. But that is ok, that is natural, that is why
family life is also something that you should always work on, al-
ways invest in, always keep at the top of your priorities.

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4.3 Lessons and advice – basic life tools

The first things you learn in life, you learn from your family. Think
about it, from basic things like how to hold a spoon and get it to
your mouth without spilling all the food on the way, how to tie
your shoes when the rabbit goes through the loop and into the
hole, how to brush your teeth and comb your hair. How to say hello
and goodbye, how to say yes please and no thank you.

If you start trying to count all the things you learn from your fam-
ily you will get a headache and the list will fill more books than
your shelf can hold. Most of these things you don’t even know you
learnt from your family. Not all of these things seem good, you will
learn how to lie from your brother or sister, you will learn how to
fight from them as you jump around the livingroom making a mess
and chasing each other, you will learn how to do naughty things,
how to do fun things, how to do all the things that your parents
don’t really want you to learn. You will also learn about loyalty
when your mom asks who did this, you will learn about sacrifice
when your big sister says she did it when everybody knows it was
you, you will learn a lot. So much. So quickly. Constantly. All your
life.

Maybe this is a good time to stop reading and go to your family and
thank them for all of those things you got from them. The amazing
tool box of things, or instruments that help you build your own
life, your present, your future, your next family. The screwdrivers
of good manners and discipline that help you unscrew things and
tighten others, the hammer of hard work persistence and perse-
verance that will help you get things together in a strong and ef-
ficient way, the mattress of support and love and acceptance on
which you lay your tired head after a bad day outside in the real
world. Tools. For you.

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Think about those tools. Make a list of what you got when you
were growing up, what you still get all the time. See how import-
ant they are and keep that list close. Sooner than you think, you
will need that list to teach your children what they need to know
to succeed. Trust me, the world may change in a fast way all the
time, but these tools have been part of our life, our education, our
upbringing for thousands of years and will always remain import-
ant.

4.4 Your own family, twice

You are young. You probably don’t even think about starting a
family. That is a good thing, there will be time for that and when it
comes, it will come as a surprise to you as well as to others.

But it is always a good thing to start thinking about the future,
even if it is not making real plans, just dreams or some big picture
of what you want to see in your future, what you want to be, in
what kind of a relationship, what kind of husband or wife you like
to have, what kind of children you would like to have.

Look around you. Look at your own family, look at your friends
families. How do they live together, how do they behave, how do
they interact, how do they solve problems, how do they build their
lives together.

It is hard to learn from experience of others, and most of the time
we do not even know the full story behind what we can see or
what we can understand, but like in everything in life, getting a
good role model is a valuable tool in building yourselves.

A lot of people have role models who are rich businessmen, suc-
cessful actors or singers, leaders of countries or political move-

49

ments and such, but in real life, in the things that really matter,
your role models are usually very close to you, sometimes right
under your nose. You just have to look.

This couple are married for thirty years and still walk in the street
hand in hand. Why? How did they do that? What kind of work did
they put into that relationship? What sacrifices did they do to get
there? How did they find the secret to do these sacrifices without
feeling bad and bitter about what they gave up or what they chose
to do?

These parents have amazing children who are considerate, hard-
working, honest, loving, respectful and independent. How did
they do that? What did they teach them? What tools did they give
them? What kind of opportunities did they open for them? Look
and learn.

Soon you will create your second family, your own family. Learn
as much as you can from the first family and try to see how that
will work for you. And remember, when we are young we criticize
our parents. A lot. They are old. They are another generation, they
don’t understand me, they don’t understand how I live my life,
they just don’t get it. Does that sound familiar? If it does , remem-
ber what a wise man once said – when I was twenty I swore that I
would never be like my parents, and when I was forty I did every-
thing in my powers to be exactly like my parents. Just keep that in
mind. That is all.

4.5 The sustainable family

The family is the center of your world, want it or not, like it or not.
At least if you are lucky, but it also is part of your world, not just
a point of reference, and must be treated like the other aspects of

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