Surprise Me by Sophie Kinsella

My Dan. He’s haloed in the golden light. His eyes are all crinkly and loving.
And I thought I was on top of this, no problem … but suddenly I can’t speak.

As though sensing this, Dan draws breath, and I can tell he’s choked up, too.
Why the hell did we decide to make emotional vows to each other in front of
other people? Why did we think this was a good idea?

‘Sylvie,’ he says, his voice a little crackly. ‘Before I make my vows, I want to
tell you one thing.’ He leans forward and whispers in my ear, ‘We’re going to St
Lucia tomorrow, it’s all fixed up. All four of us. Familymoon. Surprise.’

What? What? I thought we were done with surprises. He was not supposed to
do that. Although, oh my God, St Lucia! I blink a couple of times, then lean
forward and whisper in his ear.

‘I’m not wearing any knickers. Surprise.’
Ha! His expression!
Dan seems temporarily to have forgotten about making his vows, so I’m about
to launch in with my own set, when there’s a slight kerfuffle from the entrance
hall. The next moment, Dr Bamford is making his way into the room. He waves
at us cheerily and takes his place on a chair.
‘Surprise,’ I say to Dan. ‘I thought he ought to be here. He started this all off,
after all.’
‘Good call.’ Dan nods, his eyes softening. ‘Good call.’

And then somehow we’ve said all our vows and not cried or tripped up, and
everyone has applauded and we’re all on the champagne. Clarissa is playing jazz
records on the old gramophone and some of the volunteers are dancing in a
makeshift dancing space. I can see Robert talking intently to Mary – hmm,
there’s an idea – and Dan’s parents are doing a rather flashy quickstep. Neville’s
eyes are fixed on Sue’s, and the sight of them moving in perfect time with each
other makes me blink. Then, as if she can sense me watching, Sue meets my eye
and smiles over Neville’s shoulder and I wave back.

I catch Clarissa’s eye as she changes a record on the gramophone and give her
a fond smile. Clarissa has been another revelation. Three months ago she
stunned us by revealing she’d written a ghost story set in Willoughby House and
recorded it as a podcast! Without telling anyone! She said she’d heard me
suggesting it and it had stuck in her mind and had thought she’d ‘have a bash’.
It’s up on the website now, and keeps being downloaded, and we all know that
Clarissa will end up going into writing full time one day. She just doesn’t seem
to know it herself, yet.

As I’m standing there with Dan, watching everyone, he leans over and
murmurs, ‘Have you told Mrs Kendrick yet? Or Clarissa?’

I know what he means and shake my head. ‘Not the time,’ I say quietly. ‘After
we get back.’

I’m so proud of everything we’ve achieved at Willoughby House. And I love
the place more than ever now it has a new lease of life. But nothing changes if
nothing changes. I saw that slogan on a T-shirt the other day, and it really
resonated. I’ve changed. My horizons have shifted. And if I want to keep on
growing and changing, I need to challenge myself.

It’s taken a while to work out what to do next, but I’ve finally found the
perfect thing. I’m masterminding the campaign for the new children’s wing at
the New London Hospital. I saw the advert for the post and instantly I thought:
Yes. It’s a big job, and I had to persuade Cedric and his board that my skills
would transfer from the world of art history, but every time I think about it I feel
a surge of adrenaline. I’ll be helping children. I’ll be achieving a whole new
level of fundraising. And someone else can take on my work here – someone
with fresh eyes and energy.

Sometimes you need to poke things with a stick. If I hadn’t poked our
marriage with a stick, what would have happened, long-term? I don’t like
thinking this much, because it’s irrelevant now, everything did come out and
we’re OK. But let’s just say … I don’t think it would have been great.

When I look back at ourselves, I feel that the Dan and Sylvie who were
married for all those years, were so pleased with each other, who thought life
was such a breeze … they’re different people. They had no idea.

‘Congratulations!’ A booming voice greets us and I see Dr Bamford
approaching, glass in hand. ‘How nice to see you again, and thank you for the
invitation! I’ve always meant to visit this place but never have. Wonderful
collection of books. And the basement kitchen! Fascinating!’

‘You probably think it’s strange that we invited you today.’ I smile up at him.
‘But as I think I said in my letter, you really started something when we saw you,
all those months ago.’

‘Oh dear!’ exclaims Dr Bamford, and I can tell, he doesn’t remember at all.
‘No, it was good,’ Dan reassures him. ‘In the end.’
I nod. ‘In the end. You told us we would have another sixty-eight years of
marriage and it kind of kick-started … Well, we didn’t react brilliantly …’
‘We freaked out,’ says Dan honestly. ‘I mean, sixty-eight years. That’s a lot of
box sets.’ He laughs at his own joke, but Dr Bamford doesn’t seem to hear. He’s
peering thoughtfully at Dan. He transfers his gaze to me, then back to Dan.
‘Sixty-eight years?’ he says at last. ‘Dear me. Hmm. I may possibly have
overestimated a tad. I tend to do that. My colleague Alan McKenzie is forever
chiding me on the matter.’

Overestimated?
‘What do you mean, “overestimated”?’ I say, staring at him.
‘What do you mean, “overestimated”?’ Dan echoes, only half a second behind
me.
‘Dr McKenzie recently advised me to shave a good half per cent off my
calculations. Which would mean you have closer to, let’s say … sixty-four
years.’ He beams cheerfully, then notices a tray of canapés passing by. ‘Ah,
smoked salmon! Excuse me a moment …’
As Dr Bamford pursues the canapés, Dan and I stare at each other, stricken. I
feel cheated. I had sixty-eight years and now I only have sixty-four.
‘Sixty-four years?’ I gulp at last. ‘Sixty-four? That’s no time!’
Dan looks equally traumatized. He seizes me to him as though we’re counting
every second, crushing me against him. ‘OK, so we only have sixty-four years,’
he says. ‘Let’s make them count.’
‘No more wasting time,’ I agree fervently.
‘No more petty arguments.’
‘Live every moment.’
‘Set the alarm earlier,’ says Dan urgently. ‘Ten minutes a day. We can claw
back some time that way.’ And he looks so worked up that something inside me
says, Wait a minute. We’re overreacting again.
‘Dan …’ I say more gently. ‘No one actually knows. We could have seventy-
two more years together. Or two. Or two days.’
My gaze travels around the room, suddenly seeing everyone here in a different
light. There’s Mummy with her brittle smile, who thought she would be with
Daddy for a lot longer. John, facing a future without Owen, his eyes sad even as
he talks to Tilda – who herself had to cope with a life that didn’t pan out the way
she hoped. Dan’s parents, still dancing, faces determined, making it work. Mary
and Robert, chatting closely with shy smiles, maybe at the start of something?
And my girls, dancing joyously in their Chelsea top and Gruffalo costume. Out
of all of us, they’ve got the right idea.
‘Come on.’ I put a hand on his arm and squeeze it fondly. ‘Come on, Dan.
Let’s just get on with life.’
And I lead him on to the dance floor, where everyone breaks off to applaud us.
Dan throws some shapes and Tilda whoops and the girls spin round and round
with me, laughing.
And we get on with life.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

While writing this book, I reflected a lot on longevity, loyalty and partnership.
I am lucky enough to have been writing books for many years, for which I’m

endlessly grateful to my wonderful and loyal readers. Writers don’t really have
the facility to ‘renew their vows’ with their readers – but I’m lifting a glass to
you all, anyway. Thank you so much for reading.

I would also like to take this opportunity to acknowledge and thank my
publishers around the world. I am, again, lucky enough to be published in many
countries, from the UK, US and Canada, throughout Europe, to South America,
Asia and Australasia. I have worked closely with many of my publishers and
have built up fantastic long-term relationships with them. Other countries I’m
yet to visit – but I’m still very aware of how much energy and enthusiasm goes
into publishing my books. I will be forever grateful.

I would like to thank in particular my agenting team – a group of very talented
and supportive people, who could only ever surprise me in a good way. (This is
not a challenge!) Araminta Whitley, Marina de Pass, Kim Witherspoon, Jessica
Mileo, Maria Whelan, Nicki Kennedy, Sam Edenborough, Katherine West,
Jenny Robson, Simone Smith and Florence Dodd: thank you.

Thanks also to The Board, which has been in my life nearly as long as I have
been writing. Can’t imagine doing it without you.

Jenny Colgan, thank you for being my Doctor Who expert.
And finally, as this is a book about marriage, I would like to credit my
constantly amazing husband Henry and our children Freddy, Hugo, Oscar, Rex
and Sissy, for supporting me, cheering me on, making me laugh and teaching me
what long-term love looks like.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Sophie Kinsella is an international bestselling writer. She is the author of many
number-one bestsellers, including the hugely popular Shopaholic series. She has
also written seven bestselling novels as Madeleine Wickham.

She lives between London and the country with her husband and family.

Visit her website at www.sophiekinsella.co.uk and find her on Facebook at
www.facebook.com/SophieKinsellaOfficial. You can also follow her on Twitter
@KinsellaSophie and Instagram @sophiekinsellawriter.

OTHER BOOKS

Sophie Kinsella’s hilarious, heart-warming
standalone novels

Certain she’s going to die in a plane crash, Emma blurts out her deepest, darkest
secrets to the sexy stranger next to her. But it’s OK, because she’ll never have to

see him again … will she?

Samantha works all hours, has no home life and thrives on adrenaline. Then one
day it all falls apart. She finds herself a new life as housekeeper in a country
house. Will her old life ever catch up with her? And if it does, will she want it
back?

What if you woke up and your life was perfect? Somehow Lexi’s life has fast-
forwarded three years, and she has everything she’s ever wanted – the job, the
house, the man. Or does she? What went on in those missing years, and can she

cope when she finds out the truth?

Lara has always had an overactive imagination. But even she finds it hard to
believe when the ghost of her great aunt Sadie shows up, asking for her help. Is
Lara losing her mind? Or could two girls from different times end up helping

each other?

First Poppy loses her engagement ring – a priceless heirloom – and then she
misplaces her phone. The only alternative seems to be to take a mobile she finds

in a bin. Little knowing that she’s picked up another man in the process …

Lottie is determined to get married. And Ben seems perfect – they have history,
he’s gorgeous and he’s willing to do it now. They’ll iron out their little

differences later. All that’s left to do is seal the deal. But their families have
different plans …

Katie looks like she lives the perfect life, with her glamorous job in London and
stunning Instagram feed. But her reality is not-so-perfect: a tiny flat, and a
hideous commute, and then she’s given the sack. Moving home to Somerset,

Katie helps her dad with his new glamping business. Then Demeter – nightmare
ex-boss and the woman who has everything – books in for a holiday with her
family … Will Katie get her revenge? Does Demeter have such a perfect life
after all? And what’s wrong with not-so-perfect anyway?

FOR YOUNG ADULTS

Audrey can’t leave the house. She can’t even take off her dark glasses inside.
But then Linus stumbles into her life.



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First published in Great Britain in 2018 by Bantam Press
an imprint of Transworld Publishers
Copyright © Madhen Media Ltd 2018
Cover design by Richard Ogle/TW

Cover illustration by Lucy Davey/The Artworks

Sophie Kinsella has asserted her right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents
Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.

This book is a work of fiction and, except in the case of historical fact, any
resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

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copyright material, both illustrative and quoted. We apologize for any omissions
in this respect and will be pleased to make the appropriate acknowledgements in

any future edition.

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Version 1.0 Epub ISBN 9781473510623
ISBNs 9780593074800 (cased)
9780593074817 (tpb)

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