April 2005

April 2005 THE MAGAZINE THAT KEEPS YOU IN TOUCH Est. 1893

We had 24 members at our welcome club As part of Holy Trinity’s Flower Festival in 2003
several people in the village kindly opened their
meeting on February 15th 2005 and it gardens to visitors. We are hoping to repeat this
was our AGM. Our chairman Mr Tony
Jenkins read out the balance sheets and venture again over the weekend of 18th and 19th June.
thanked the Parish Council and the whist After an event like this, we occasionally hear the
drive members for their donations to our comment, “Oh! If only we’d known, we’d have
club. He then thanked our secretary Jean participated”. Well now is your chance. If you have a
for all her hard work and our president garden, large or small, which you enjoy sharing with
Robin. Also he thanked our ladies who others and would be willing to open it to the public,
collected the subscriptions Barbara doing will you please contact me on 730425 and I’ll tell you
the raffle and giving lifts to members, Julie at the bring and buy more about what is involved.
stall, the tea hostesses and myself for doing the write ups of our
meetings to put in the Village Magazine. Diane Barnett
We had a good year in 2004 with speakers, Harvest Festival
Service and our trip at Christmas to High Wych Carol Service www.hatfield-heath.co.uk
and then tea with entertainment, our hosts being the Rotary
members of Sawbridgeworth. Wayne Fogg has started building the above Village
Jean then held a silence for Mr Burrows who recently died our website, so far he has pages on: Community Issues such as
condolences to Mrs Burrows. Jean read out some episodes of speeding, Useful Links, including phone numbers, local
the first Welcome Club minutes from 1955. These records have groups, local businesses. He is also in the process of
been handed down from secretary to secretary since then till the writing a page on parking issues in the village. There is
present time, which means that our club has now reached its quite a lot of information to collate, he will be writing
50th Anniversary. We saw lots of photographs of previous about the following areas: School not being allowed to use
members whom some of our members knew. It was very Village car park, Parking in front of Broomfields Cottages
interesting to hear the records from that first meeting in 1955. Parking along the Stortford Road near the Thatchers pub
At that time the Club was held in the annexe of the Trinity Parking in Broomfields and the doctors Surgery, Parking
Church. In the winter it was held at 7.30pm and in the summer in front of the shops. Tell us what you think of the website.
in the afternoons. The subscriptions then were 3 pence. It was at Any pictures you have for the gallery, please forward to
first going to be called the Sixties, but in the end was called the us. Address (snail& mail) under magazine details 3 rd page.
Welcome Club. The activities were abounding, there was a
choir, games, outings and Christmas parties, there were prizes HATFIELD HEATH PRE- SCHOOL
of groceries, coal, wood and chocolates. Our present members 2ND CASINO NIGHT AT HUNTERS MEET
enjoy a similar theme.
THURSDAY 19TH MAY 2005 at 7.30pm
In a few months we will be having our 50th anniversary in the Tickets £20 to include hot and cold buffet - £100 Fun
Village Hall this will be quite something. If anyone out there Money & prizes.
would like to come and share our meetings which are held on Please come along and support your local Pre-School, we
the third Tuesday at 2.30pm then do come along, you will be had a fantastic evening last year!
made most welcome, welcome is as welcome does.

Keep Smiling

1

LIST OF CLUBS, GROUPS & CLASSES
WITH TELEPHONE NUMBERS

VILLAGE HALL AEROBICS 07956 827 798

April 730 544 FIT & FIFTY 724 373

3 EASTER 1 INSTITUTE 730 544 LUNCHEON CLUB
08.00 Holy Communion HT
09.30 Family Service and Baptism HT PRE-SCHOOL 730 354 For all Senior Citizens
10.30 Family Service with Communion URC
18.30 Evensong HT (2 ½ -5) 730 581

4 11.30 Luncheon Club URC RISING FIVES 414 238 CONVERSATIONAL
5 14:00 Pre-school Open Day H
6 10.30 Holy Communion – 1662 The Close (4 –5 years) FRENCH 730 741

20.00 Leisure Hour URC HH UNDER FIVES 739 ITALIAN LANGUAGE &
10 EASTER 2
302 SPANISH LANGUAGE
09.30 Holy Communion HT
10.30 Family Service URC (Mother & Toddler) CLUBS 07786 341754
11-22 incl Spring Break for School and Pre-school
12 14.30 Heath Ladies H FRIDAY CLUB (7-12 SPANISH LANGUAGE
17 EASTER 3
08.00 Holy Communion HT years) 01279 731 288
09.30 Matins
10.30 Family Service URC 730 440 & 730 465 AEROBICS 723 125
11.00 Annual Parochial Church Meeting HT
18.00 Service at the Close JO JINGLES FOOTBALL CLUB 734
19 14.30 Welcome Club H
20 10.45 MU Holy Communion HT (6 mths - 7years) 868 410 056
11.30 Luncheon Club URC
20.00 Leisure Hour URC SCHOOL FOOTBALL CRICKET CLUB 730 674
24 EASTER 4
09.30 Family Communion HT CLUB www.freewebs.com/hatfieldh
10.30 Family Service with Communion URC 01279 730 975 eathcc
27 19:45 Gardening Club H
28 20.00 Village Hall AGM CR SCOUTS 812 586 HEATH PLAYERS
30 19.00 Mission Supper URC
May 2005 CUBS Chris Hancock and play reading for
1 EASTER 5 731 646 pleasure 730 825 or
08.00 Holy Communion HT
09.30 Family Service HT BROWNIES 734 391 730 517
10.30 Family Service with Communion URC
18.30 Evensong HT SUNDAY CLUB HISTORY SOCIETY
H-Village Hall / CR-Committee Room H / HT-Holy
Trinity Church / URC-United Reform Church / I- 9.30am Holy Trinity 730 730 530
Institute / S-School
288 ROYAL BRITISH
LUNCHEON CLUB
H.T. YOUTH GROUP LEGION 657 470
COOKS URGENTLY REQUIRED
731 318 Womens section 718 102
even for just 2-3 times a year
KARATE 445 539 URC JUNIOR CHURCH
1st Monday or 3rd Wednesday.
JUNIOR KARATE Sunday 10.30am 730 690
ALSO ANYONE WHO CAN HELP WITH
01992 575 679 BELL RINGERS 730 526

SOSEN GORE JU JITSU CHOIR Canon Tim Potter

07947 599 801 730 288

WU CHI - 07947 599 801 WOMANS LEISURE

SENIOR BOWLS 724 833HOUR

OPEN BOWLS 730 539 730 465

BRIDGE CLUB 723 948 HEATH LADIES 730 421
GARDENING CLUB COFFEE MORNING
730 425
WELCOME CLUB CONSERVATIVE
730 421
OPEN COFFEE ASSOC.
MORNING 730 288
Chairman P Fuller-Lewis

730 587
CATHOLIC CHURCH
Hatfield Broad Oak

SERVING ETC. BRIDGE CLUB 723 948 01371 872 550
would also be most welcome. ART CLASSES 730 281 TALKING NEWSPAPERS

01279 651 270 OR

01279 653 925

2

HELP LINES The Diary of Stephen Green

POLICE 01279 730 388 19th Century Broomshawbury (Hatfield Broad Oak)

Calls are automatically redirected when necessary Farmer and Local Magistrate

DOCTORS Broomfields 01279 730 616 29th April 1845

DOCTOR Sawbridgeworth 01279 723 172 Mr Kearsey & Mr Preston came to
Broomshawbury to mark Timber for falling(sic)in
THE SAMARITANS 01279 421 110 the wood. Mr Richard Burton came to book the
same.
HATFIELD HEATH C.P. SCHOOL 01279 730 382
HATFIELD HEATH U R CHURCH
H/HEATH HALF HOUR HELPERS 07944 748 478 MISSION SUPPER

MAGAZINE DETAILS 30th April 7.00pm U R C Hall
With a talk by Garry Knott on The Michael
DEADLINE 16TH OF THE MONTH Roberts Charitable Trust on its FULLIFE work in
Poland
Email :- [email protected]
Tickets £4
Send your letters /articles/ reports /Photographs, by hand,
Everyone Welcome Ring Jean on 730465
floppy disc, CD, or email. If delivering by hand you can
6th April 8.00pm – Ethiopia - Jeff Webster
either drop it off at PBM printers in the magazine tray or 20th April 8.00pm - Bible Ephemera from the
Wars - Garry Baugh
direct to me :- Bruno(Editor) “Manor Lodge”, Garry has a large collection of Bibles and related
items which he displays around the country. It
Chelmsford Rd, Hatfield Heath CM22 7BD. should be a very interesting evening.

Editor: - Bruno Scheggia 01279 730 498 We meet in the U R C Hall

Bruno’s Mobile Phone number 07932 640 275 All are welcome to come along.

Treasurer: - Mel Sullivan 01279 731 434 HIRE UR CHURCH HALL FOR
BIRTHDAY PARTIES
Distribution:-Barbara Scheggia 01279 730 498
You can hire the hall for children's parties
Produced by- PBM 01279 730 444 £8.50 / hour

DISCLAIMER: The Editor and Printers do not take Tel :01279 730 581
responsibility for the information given or views expressed in
the Hatfield Heath Village Magazine. Nor is any culpability
accepted in work done by advertisers.

DISTRICT COUNCILLOR
Mark Lemon 730 581

PARISH COUNCIL

CHAIRMAN Peter Fuller-Lewis - 01279 730 587

PARISH CLERK Ernie Fenwick - 01279 739 016

3

aralia S.O.S. Pre-School are collecting and
urgently need the stars and hands
Garden design found on boxes of Persil washing
powder if you have any please bring
Local company Specialising in them into the Village Hall
domestic gardens with innovative &
flexible approach. Comprehensive Mon – Fri 9am –12.15pm
service offered including: (during term time).

• Surveying & drafting of site plan
• Design concepts & visualisation
• Sourcing of all landscape materials
• Hard landscaping implementation
• Full planting plans & implementation

Treat yourself Drop in for Tea, Coffee and light refreshments
To a new garden
Monday to Friday mornings
Tel: 01279 730 040 10.00 am – 12 noon
Mobile: 07970 906 233
A chance to meet others and chat All welcome
Studio, aralia garden design,
Clipped hedge cottage
Dunmow road, hatfield heath,
Herts CM22 7EE

The Young lads are waiting to serve you. There are
others that take turns to run the coffee morning, so
there is no guarantee that they will be there, but all
the volunteers are welcoming and eager to serve you.

4

If your Drive or Patio is looking tired
And overgrown, we offer.

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Tennis Courts, Decking, Building Sites,
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th Cambridge Road, Stansted, Essex. CM24 8DB.

URC Hall £5 Has full time vacancies
Nibbles – Bring own Drink 20 years Experience
Hatfield Broad Oak
Teams of 6 Call Diane East
To Book Tel: 01279 718 102

THE HEATH LADIES.

kinds of scenery, the animals, the OVER 50 DISPLAYS 100S OF COMBINATIONS
flowers and of course the people, in
their colourful national costumes, . NATURAL STONE FIREPLACES
who live there. We are grateful to . WOOD & STONE MANTELS
. ELECTRIC, GAS & SOLID FUEL FIRES
next meeting on Tuesday 12th April, . MARBLE, GRANITE, SLATE & TILES

. FENDERS, FIREGUARDS, FRETS,
. COAL BUCKETS
. OIL PAINTINGS, MIRRORS,
. STATUES & LAMPS
. COMPANION SETS, DOG GRATES
. BERRY, DIMPLEX, VALOR,
. MAGIGLO

. Plus a range of catalytic
flueless fires and powerflues
“for that no chimney situation”

5

For all your domestic needs We have just celebrated Easter. Christians around
the world have remembered how Jesus died for us
Established for 6 years - References available.
Please telephone Maxine on all on that awful cross on, what we now call,
Good Friday. Then on Easter Day we
celebrated the historic reality that the tomb
was empty and Jesus had been raised to life. Death
conquered, and hope for eternity
established.

There were Easter eggs and lots of fun too!

When I remember the story I am challenged about my own
commitment to what I believe in. Jesus gave everything for us.
He was so committed to love us all. He suffered unimaginably
and died for us. Mel Gibson’s “Passion of the Christ” has shown
us what it must have been like. Am I as committed to anything
or anyone like that? Perhaps the world needs a few more of us
to be willing to be that committed to work for the good of all in
society.

When I celebrate Easter I am encouraged. Not only does God
love me enough for Jesus to die for me but He has also given me
wonderful hope for the future which nothing can take away.
Here is what I need in order to go on living in
this confusing and, frankly, evil world.

May we all find these events from 2000 years
ago as challenging and as encouraging.

Yours sincerely

Tim Potter

Alzheimer’s Society A True Village Stalwart
Grace Clark
Dementia care and research
Many of the people who have
Uttlesford Branch lived in the village for some
Help, support and advice for people with dementia years will have memories of
Grace Clark. Well Grace died
and those who care for them
12 Stortford Road, Gt. Dunmow, Essex, CM6 1DA in February of this year at the
ripe age of 92 years. Grace had
Telephone: 01372 872 519 moved to Cornwall over
E-mail:- [email protected] twenty years ago to be nearer
her daughter Carol. However
Registered Charity No 296645 we at the Heath have lots of
good memories of Grace. As a
dedicated parishioner at Holy
Trinity Church, active member of
the Women's Institute and Heath Players (often as a
Pearlie Queen at Old Tyme Music Halls). In fact Grace
was to be found in nearly all the clubs and groups around
the village.
I feel we all benefited from Grace's stamina and
enthusiasm. Great to have known you Grace.
Love
Jude Foster

Jude has suggested a “Village Characters” Column.
If you have anything to contribute to rekindle memories I
would love to hear from you. Photo’s, letters, articles etc.
can be scanned and returned.
Bruno (Editor)

6

WE ARE SO FORTUNATE TO HAVE SUCH AN HOWE GREEN HOUSE SCHOOL
EXCELLENT DOCTORS PRACTICE AND ACORNS NURSERY
IN OUR VILLAGE.
An Independent Day School and
A couple of weeks ago I was stupid enough to get Nursery for boys and girls
something in my eye. After an hour of cursing and Optrex from 2 – 11 years
it was no better, and I was just about to head off to casualty
when my wife told me to go to the surgery first, as they Headmaster: Mr. Graham R. Gorton
might well be able to help. B.A. (Hons) P.G.C.E.
I did as she suggested (for once!) and was seen within
minutes of my arrival by the practice nurse Do you wish for - A school that offers children the
A quick eye test soon ascertained that my sight was no opportunity to enjoy that sense of childhood so often
worse than usual and some very deft usage of a marking missing in today’s target driven world of education?
fluid verified that the offending object had already come
out. What was hurting was the resulting scratching on the We offer- 
eye's surface. academic achievement balanced with emotional
Some chloramphenicol ointment, (prescribed and development - small class sizes
dispensed on the premises) soon had me sorted and back at
work again. friendly, family atmosphere - broad based curriculum
My thanks and praise must go to all the staff at our Creative emphasis:- music, drama, ballet, art
Broomfields surgery; surely this is our grass roots NHS at skills for life love of learning
it's VERY best!
Michael Hockley Set in 7 acres of beautiful countryside only five minutes
drive from Bishop’s Stortford, ten minutes from Great
Dunmow and twenty minutes from Saffron Walden.

I have noticed in other Village Magazines the surgery For further information please telephone the
produces an article on latest information I hope I can Headmaster’s Secretary, Mrs. Lesley Hubbard on 01279
persuade our surgery to email matters of interest to
villagers through the Magazine 657706.

E-mail: [email protected]

Attn: Bruno Scheggia (Editor) – LEARN TO IMPROVE YOUR LIFE –
Dear Bruno
I have now been living on the Heath for over 20 years but I Uttlesford Learning Centres offer a huge variety of
cannot recall the publication of the Village Magazine being courses – just for you. Whether it’s getting to grips with
of such a high quality in every respect, not only for the computers, a foreign language, improving your
content but the layout of the magazine, and this last month knowledge or ways to develop a business as well as
has been no exception. your own skills.
I would like to add my thanks to, I am sure, the thanks of so
many in the Village. The magazine is not only attractive but It’s all here – just ‘round the corner’ from you - or even
the content each month appears to be of great interest to on your doorstep, with your own computer at home.
those who consider themselves very fortunate in living in the Now, how EASY is that?
Village. With a number of FREE courses and many more
May I take this opportunity of thanking you, the editorial costing only a few pounds - there is really no excuse.
team, and those who are involved in whatever way in the So, why are you waiting!
publication, also not forgetting those who continue to add
interest by producing material for publication. Look for the nearest centre to you and give them a
Please feel free to publish this if you feel it is appropriate. CALL NOW:
* Dunmow & Thaxted Areas:
Maurice Lawrance
Clarance House 01371 830245
Thank you for your kind words. As you say we mustn’t forget * Saffron Walden Area:
those who send material and we would love to have more
villagers becoming involved, sharing information, a moan, a Fairycroft House 01799 527109
joke, . and the learndirect centre at
I am surprised I don’t have more from children. With their Saffron Walden High School 01799 513030
ability with computers it would be a breeze for them to * Stansted Area:
compile stuff for the magazine. I am sure they have a school Stansted Airport learndirect 01279 656532 and
newsletter and probably written for it. I would like to have Peter Kirk Centre 01279 813319
information on events that are due to happen at school or view full details on-line at www.uttlesford.gov.uk
before hand rather than after the event
After all, learning does not stop when you leave school.
7 Learning is for life, and it can be fun as well!

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The ‘Handy Man to know’

Phone: 01279 718 329 or I was intrigued at the photo's in the last magazine to do
07881 601 365 with parking and pulling out of turnings in the village.
Why wasn't there one of pulling out of Broomfields??
JASPER TAXATION SERVICES LTD After all this is the hot topic at the moment, with the
Qualified professionals offering advice to yellow line issue. In my opinion however, the visibility
when pulling out of Broomfields, (which I do on a
sole traders/small businesses daily basis) is far worse to the left, than it is to the
Self Assessment & Payroll right. I know that there are cars parked in front of the
houses to the right, however now that the cars are
Fees agreed in advance - Free Initial Consultation parked near the houses rather than the curbside, there
Stonehall Business Centre, Matching Green is no longer a visibility issue (in my opinion). The
Tel: 01279 739315 & 739324 view from the left on the other hand, is another matter.
Email: [email protected] There is far less visibility from the left with the tree
overhanging the pathway reducing visibility even
The Inheritance Tax Trap further. Recently there was an accident when someone
was pulling out of Broomfields, however the cause of
Don’t get caught out the accident was not the visibilty to the right. The
Many people pay large amounts of Inheritance Tax actual cause was that a car was travelling too fast
unnecessarily. If only they had received expert advice, coming from the left, and the driver of the car pulling
their tax bills could have been reduced or completely out of Broomfields didn't see the car until it was too
avoided. late. Therefore the real cause was the visibility to the
The death tax rate on a person’s estate above the Nil left and the speed the other car was doing (don't get me
Rate Band is at present 40%. There are many started on speeding through our village). Anyway, just
exemptions and reliefs available, some of which may wanted to rant and rave a little, and get my opinion of
apply to you. With careful planning it is possible to my chest. Thanks for your time,
reduce your tax liability significantly and ensure that
your beneficiaries inherit the result of your lifetime’s Wayne Fogg
work and not the Inland Revenue.

Take independent financial advice and secure your future.

Barrie R Ekins M L I A( dip )
Partner

Swinnerton Ekins Independent Financial Advisers

Office Tel: 01727 868 677 Along this section, shown above, which runs past the
Home Tel: 01279 739356 school a 20mph zone would be very appropriate. Last
year travelling through Devon these zones were very
Mobile: 07960 418573 common. Bruno

Swinnerton Ekins Independent Financial Advisers is an appointed 8
representative of Inter-Alliance (Group Practices) Limited which is
authorised and regulated by the Financial Services Authority.
Inter-Alliance (Group Practices) Limited is a wholly owned
Subsidiary of Inter-Alliance Group PLC

CO – OP BREAK – INS

Tel / Fax : 01279 739 357

I have received a few queries as to why the Parish Please call or fax us on the number above
Council did not approve steel shutters at the Co – op for further details on your requirements of
shop in our village. In July 2002 the Parish Council
supported an application for the installation of 2 NEWSPAPERS,
perforated shutters at the front and one at the rear JOURNALS AND MAGAZINE
especially in view of the possibilities of further break
– ins. The only query was over the proposed colour of 2 Manse Cottages, Chelmsford Road,
the shutters. However the District Council’s Planning Hatfield Heath Bishop's Stortford CM22 7AE
Dept. then refused the application.
Peter Fuller Lewis WE ARE HERE TO SERVE YOU
Chairman Parish Council

9

Parish Plan –Local Businesses Directory
Notes of First Meeting held 18 January 2005 Initially a simple directory is required
Advertising listing local businesses and their
'A' boards are considered essential for retail shops contact details. Brendan will request
dependent upon passing trade. An acceptable design the details from the local businesses
standard is required together with agreement as to where via the Village Magazine and then
they may be placed. Additional signs are needed to arrange publication of a combined list
provide direction towards the shops off the main and map. Additional copies will be
thoroughfare. A large parish map with business locations published for handouts / reference at
is required centrally in the village e.g. adjacent to the local businesses. The Post Office
village notice board at the White Lion. insistence on giving shops along Pond
Lane an address of The Heath" is
causing confusion for delivery drivers
and customers.
Networking
Chris has many contacts with local
Chambers of Commerce and is
prepared to share his knowledge of
various events which may present
business opportunities e.g. Stansted
Airport and Harlow expansion plans.
This inaugural meeting was
considered a useful networking
exercise and a next meeting is planned
for 1 March 2005 at either the Institute
or Hunters Meet.
Parking
Parking is a major issue for staff and
customers of local businesses.

Signage to existing car parks needs improving. Village
centre car park precludes parking because of time
restriction and lack of lighting late at night. Consider
using village green; parking opposite the Thatchers was
apparently along whole length of green before posts were
installed; similarly for the parking along Pond Lane,
Consider lay-bys along the Heath to the east of Holy
Trinity church. Consider permit system to avoid airport
customers dumping cars for the duration of their holiday.
Local residents and staff are blocking service roads for
whole day-consider 1 hour parking restriction to
encourage passing trade. Consider renting individual
village hall parking spaces to staff in local businesses.

 Learn Spanish in relaxed surroundings
with an experienced tutor.

 Small classes £6.00 per week,
refreshments included.

 All levels taught. Help with GCSE and A
level studies.

 Beginner’s daytime class starting Easter.
Contact

Anne Whale (MA, BA Hons. Spanish)

10

To anyone who OPERATES a business in the village and M.I. HOLLIS - IRON DESIGN
would like to make a difference. We are holding our next
one hour meeting at the Hunters Meet at 10am on CUSTOM MADE HAND CRAFTED
Tuesday12th April. WROUGHT IRONWORK
If you are unable to attend but would like more
information and lend your support please phone Ann or GATES  FENCING  RAILINGS  SECURITY GRILLS
Sue at Courtyard Flowers on 01279 730 700 C AT  BIRD AVIARY  PLANTERS HANGING BASKETS

THE PROBUS CLUB OF FYFIELD. 07831 317 535 or 01279 734 507
Although named the Probus Club of Fyfield this club has e-mail : [email protected]
for the last few years held its luncheon meetings at the
Hunter's Meet, Hatfield Heath, on the third Wednesday of www.wroughtironfab.co.uk
every month. We have, at present, a membership of over
40 members but still have a few vacancies for new 8 PRIMLEY LANE SHEERING BISHOPS STORTFORD HERTS CM22 7NJ
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retired professional or business men and are not service HIGH HOUSE
clubs, although originally having been founded by Rotary. Montessori Day Nursery
After our lunch we usually have a speaker. If anyone is
interested in coming to one of our meetings with a view to (opposite Stansted Airport Terminal )
joining I would be pleased to give them further
information. Accepts Children from 3 months to 5 vears

Fred Bard. Hon.Secretary Tel: 01279 731501

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11

JESUS’ MARRIAGE, DA VINCI’S PAINTINGS Harvard Professor Robert Langdon, whose early adventures
AND THE DIVINE PROPORTION are documented in Brown’s ‘Angels And Demons’, along
with French cryptographer Sophie Neveu travel the world
All of the aforesaid are delved into in great detail in the in search of the Holy Grail, which is said to have been in the
worldwide best-selling book, The Da Vinci Code, from the possession at one time of famous artist Leonardo Da Vinci,
hand of Dan Brown. In this, one of the highest-selling who incorporated the Grail’s secrets into his artwork, most
books in recent history, Brown explores and questions the obviously his work entitled “The Last Supper”, which
origins of Christianity, whilst leading his readers on a depicts Jesus’ last documented consumption of a meal.
mind-bending fictitious trail.

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12

The person sitting to Jesus’ right-hand-side in the painting ‘B’ TEAM FIXTURES
appears to be a woman, not one of Jesus’ twelve male
disciples. The question ‘is Dan Brown an atheist?’ seems to The following matches are scheduled for the Hatfield
be answered as he claims in his novel that this woman at Heath CPS FC ‘B’ Team:
The Last Supper was in fact Jesus’ wife, namely Mary
Magdalene. Tuesday 22 March 2005
(Away) vs. Howe Green
The intrigue continues as Brown explores the divine
proportion, 1.618, more commonly known in this country May 2005
as the golden ratio. According to Brown, the divine (Away) vs. Reedings
proportion is a measurement used to create the universe,
from human bone-length down to the designs on flower THIS PARROT IS DECEASED
petals. A woman brought a very limp parrot into a veterinary
hospital. As she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out
Whilst some have suggested that the last one-hundred pages his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a
of the novel are in desperate need of editing, The Da Vinci moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, " I'm
Code remains one of the most fascinating and thought so sorry, Polly has passed away."
provoking books in recent history. The distressed owner wailed, "are you sure? I mean, you
haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just
THINKING CAPS be in a coma or something."
The Vet rolled his eyes, shrugged, turned and left the room
A quick question we’d be intrigued to know the answer to: returning moments later with a beautiful black Labrador. As
the bird's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on
As reported last month, Hatfield Heath CP School is to his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table
field a team of eight football players to face and sniffed the dead parrot from top to bottom. He then
Sawbridgeworth side, Reedings School, a match which has looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet
been re-scheduled for May. Can anybody tell us, when was then led the dog out, but returned a few moments later with
the last time the school played Reedings in a football a cat. The cat jumped up and also sniffed delicately at the
match? bird. The cat sat back, shook it's head, meowed and ran out
of the room. The vet looked at the woman and said, " I'm
Answers can be e-mailed to [email protected] or sorry, but like I said, your parrot is most definitely, 100%,
sent in by writing to this magazine at the usual address certifiably dead."
(found near the front of the magazine). He then turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and
produced a bill which he handed to the woman. The parrot's
owner, still in shock, took the bill. “£150.! " she cried.
"£150. just to tell me that my bird is dead?!"
The vet shrugged, "If you'd taken my word for it, the bill
would only have been £20. But with the Lab report and the
Cat Scan...what did you expect?

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PaintingandDecorating Hatfield Heath Gardening Club

If you are Looking for an “NOT ANOTHER BUY AND DIE PLANT”
Excellent Standard of Decorating Dendrobium, miltonia, phalaenopsis, pleione – some of the
names sound forbidding but orchids are appearing more and
by a more in garden centres and are taking over from bulbs and
Professional Tradesman other pot plants as presents for that special occasion. There
are said to be over 70,000 species and hybrid orchids and the
Exterior/Interior number is always increasing as new ones are found in the wild

Then look no further and new hybrids are cultivated by man.
Please call John for a free estimate The hybridisation and micro-propagation
of new varieties is a major money earner
for the countries of south-east Asia.
Orchids are found in every part of the
DENDROBIUM world and in almost every climate. Said to
possess mystic, usually evil, powers and to have a host of
medicinal qualities including those of an aphrodisiac the only
commercial use seems to have been of the vanilla plant and
even that has now been superseded by artificial flavourings.

Perhaps because of this orchids have had the reputation of
being very difficult to grow and therefore very expensive,
another “buy and die” plant. This
is not the case and modern
varieties can do very well in the
home rewarding a little care and
attention with months of flowers
of great beauty and interest.

There are two types of plant, MILTONIA,

epiphytic orchids which grow in the

wild on tree branches or rocks and which obtain nourishment

through clinging roots and moisture through aerial roots.

Terrestrial orchids grow in soil or leaf mould and gain

nourishment and moisture through root systems or tubers. Of

the epiphytic kind are dendrobiums in which each of a

number of growing canes becomes festooned with delicate

and brightly coloured flowers, miltonias or Pansy Orchid

which bears sweetly scented pansy like flowers, sometimes

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14

several times in a year, and phalaenopsis or Butterfly Orchid,
perhaps the most commonly encountered today, which can
bear up to seventy flowers on a single spike. Of the terrestrial
kind are pleiones or the “windowsill orchid” which bears a
single spike with one or two spectacular flowers in delicate
pink with intricate veining and a lacy petticoat.

Remember that these orchids are plants from the rain forests
and need warmth and moisture. Epiphytic types will grow with
minimal support so, in the home, keep them in a light and
warm place and ideally place their pot into a second container
and on a bed of gravel which is always kept moist, this will
create the humid conditions in which they will thrive. Keep
them out of too much direct sunlight and occasionally give
them a weak foliar feed with a specialist orchid fertiliser.
Phalaenopsis will reward you by putting out new flower spikes
from the old stem once the first flush has died back or even, if
you are lucky, put up entirely new flowering stems from the
base. Dendrobiums and miltonias should be rested after
flowering and once started again will flower from the previous
year’s growth. Terrestrial orchids such as pleiones flower the
once and then set new bulbs which can be removed and
re-potted in orchid compost in early spring to restart the cycle.

Neither must we forget our own British orchids of which there
are a large number. Whilst they are not as big and showy as
others from around the world, indeed some are difficult to
distinguish even when you have them pointed out to you,
many have their own unique structure and colouring. Now a
cautionary tale – one night last July one of only two known
plants of our Lady’s Slipper orchid was stolen from its closely
guarded habitat in Lancashire. The plant, which is said to be
our rarest wild flower, produces several flowering stems each
crowned with a golden slipper held
by four long purple petals.
Fortunately seed from this plant has
been grown at Kew but it is still too
early to know whether they have
been successful. Suffice it to say that
if you do find a native orchid please
do not attempt to lift it and take it
home in a pot as it will certainly die
and you may have reduced another of PHALAENOPSIS
our native species to danger level.

Brian Prosser

At their next meeting which takes place on

Wednesday 27th. April the Hatfield Heath
Gardening Club will hear a talk by Ian
Torrance on “The Wild Flowers of the
Andes” in which orchids are expected to
figure prominently. Meetings take place in
the Hatfield Heath Village Hall and start at 7.45 p.m. Just
come along, everyone is welcome, or if you would like to
know more about the Hatfield Heath Gardening Club contact
the Chairman, Ian Murray, on 01279 724836.

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- Marathon Day!!! Personal Assistant/ Carer Required
Enjoy the day out in London!!
To offer personal care & support to independent,
We’ll have a good drink after outgoing young mother with disabilities, living in
to numb the aches and pains! Hatfield Heath
All my love
Janice xxx Minimum 25 hours per week
(Ideally, mornings and evenings)
Hours would suit a Mum with school kids
Hours very flexible for right person
Weekend work also be available Very good rates of pay
(with increased hourly rate for weekend work)
Experience of working with people with disabilities
desirable, but not essential, as training will be given

If you are interested, please contact Samantha Kirk

Tel: 01279 730791 for more details

QUALITY PRE-SCHOOL EDUCATION
FROM 21/2 YEARS* TO SCHOOL AGE

(*where places available)

ALL ENQUIRIES PLEASE CALL

01279 730 354

Registered with Ofsted and
member of the Pre-school Learning Alliance

THE VILLAGE HALL, HATFIELD HEATH
BISHOP'S STORTFORD, HERTS CM22 7EA

Tel: 07748 970 657

(Registered charity number 1070995)
www.hatfieldheath.org.uk
[email protected]

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