WATER AND ME
Water takes shape and draws
the colour of its receptacle
So am I ................
content to fit in any mould
Water glitters jewel-like
Once set free
So am I ..................
Scatter radiance of my true personality
Once break free of my fetters
Water turns into pools
When interrupted in its natural flow
So am I .....................
Closing all my rosy petals
When confined to narrow compartments
Only water has the power of
Bringing out the sandalness of the sandal
So am I ..................
Having the potent to bring out
the youness of you
Hopes in Ashes 41
STITCHED
On my birth , Tied in knots of marriage,
my cry had made without being asked like
my mother tearfully smile; a slave following a master;
Fed me till the Next morning, find my lips
last drop in her breasts stitched tightly and totally,
to keep me alive; still relish food, a mystery;
As soon turned young, Wait for day when an eve
I find my lips getting learns how to cut stitch
sticthed one by one; to liberate from slavery;
Lived a life without What a pity,
raising a query on the conceiver of universe, still
my status in our society; needs an approval 'to be or not to be'
In my almamater felt as if
I were a sheep in big herd,
running one after other;
Hopes in Ashes 43
STITCHED
On my birth , Tied in knots of marriage,
my cry had made without being asked like
my mother tearfully smile; a slave following a master;
Fed me till the Next morning, find my lips
last drop in her breasts stitched tightly and totally,
to keep me alive; still relish food, a mystery;
As soon turned young, Wait for day when an eve
I find my lips getting learns how to cut stitch
sticthed one by one; to liberate from slavery;
Lived a life without What a pity,
raising a query on the conceiver of universe, still
my status in our society; needs an approval 'to be or not to be'
In my almamater felt as if
I were a sheep in big herd,
running one after other;
Hopes in Ashes 43
THE BODY IN STONE
This stone has undergone a series
Of strange mutilations and contortions
My sculptor cast me in a category
The silent female self has been fashioned
To suit my Maker's culture
Powerful I may be, but not of my own making
This Stone in Body signifies
A curiously ambiguous non-self
The only way out from this gilded cage
Is to maintain a hurt silence
Oh, no! my words create a counter factual world
Where in I can deny the
Unnaturalness of my body
Hopes in Ashes 45
THE BODY IN STONE
This stone has undergone a series
Of strange mutilations and contortions
My sculptor cast me in a category
The silent female self has been fashioned
To suit my Maker's culture
Powerful I may be, but not of my own making
This Stone in Body signifies
A curiously ambiguous non-self
The only way out from this gilded cage
Is to maintain a hurt silence
Oh, no! my words create a counter factual world
Where in I can deny the
Unnaturalness of my body
Hopes in Ashes 45
A CRY !
I am a cry .,
an isolated cry
behind the bushes;
No one listens to ,
No one dares to shield,
I cry alone and alone;
Nothing visible ,
except deepest dark
dead silence all around;
death I am in a living body,
breath I am in a deadly body,
seal wiggling before wolves;
Would that I were made brave,
than being weaker sex;
to kill the vultures daring before.
Hopes in Ashes 47
A CRY !
I am a cry .,
an isolated cry
behind the bushes;
No one listens to ,
No one dares to shield,
I cry alone and alone;
Nothing visible ,
except deepest dark
dead silence all around;
death I am in a living body,
breath I am in a deadly body,
seal wiggling before wolves;
Would that I were made brave,
than being weaker sex;
to kill the vultures daring before.
Hopes in Ashes 47
WHEN I LOOK WITHIN
When I look within.................. When I look within.................
I know............................ I feel..................................
I have never been trained I am still learning
To feel comfortable with To fit myself in phallocentrism
The idea to take care of myself
When I look within.................
When I look within................. I feel..................................
I know.................................. I am still learning
I have never been trained To answer back to Patriarchy
To feel comfortable with
The idea to stand up for myself Years pass by ........................
In this process...................
When I look within................. Knowing, feeling, learning
I know.................................. And I find myself
I have never been trained Caged as a part of
To feel comfortable with Male-Chauvinism
The idea to assert my own self From where there is no exit
When I look within.................
I feel..................................
I am still learning
To cross the road
Hopes in Ashes 49
WHEN I LOOK WITHIN
When I look within.................. When I look within.................
I know............................ I feel..................................
I have never been trained I am still learning
To feel comfortable with To fit myself in phallocentrism
The idea to take care of myself
When I look within.................
When I look within................. I feel..................................
I know.................................. I am still learning
I have never been trained To answer back to Patriarchy
To feel comfortable with
The idea to stand up for myself Years pass by ........................
In this process...................
When I look within................. Knowing, feeling, learning
I know.................................. And I find myself
I have never been trained Caged as a part of
To feel comfortable with Male-Chauvinism
The idea to assert my own self From where there is no exit
When I look within.................
I feel..................................
I am still learning
To cross the road
Hopes in Ashes 49
I COULD HAVE !
I was not born I was not born
to sustain the to be undressed
social abuse of ; for an enjoyment,
divorce! in front of so called
divorce!! brave knights,
divorce!!! in a king's parliament;
I was not born Would that I were
to be lost made a brave than
in gambling woman of weaker sex,
just for a game, being sexualy abused
just for men's at every step,
recreation ; at every moment;
I was not born Could have crumbled
to make sit the culprits before
on the thigh they had dared to;
of a cruel man, Or had sacrificed
just to disgrace my life in defending
my husbands; my virginity, my respect !
Hopes in Ashes 51
I COULD HAVE !
I was not born I was not born
to sustain the to be undressed
social abuse of ; for an enjoyment,
divorce! in front of so called
divorce!! brave knights,
divorce!!! in a king's parliament;
I was not born Would that I were
to be lost made a brave than
in gambling woman of weaker sex,
just for a game, being sexualy abused
just for men's at every step,
recreation ; at every moment;
I was not born Could have crumbled
to make sit the culprits before
on the thigh they had dared to;
of a cruel man, Or had sacrificed
just to disgrace my life in defending
my husbands; my virginity, my respect !
Hopes in Ashes 51
AN ERUPTION!
I can see
many women,
still dying
a daily death;
Like a volcano
she expells her
smelting lava in
her silent cries;
Her pains burn
her body, as if
thousand crackers
erupt together ;
Being seeded
with her blood,
but how harvested,
she only knows!
Hopes in Ashes 53
AN ERUPTION!
I can see
many women,
still dying
a daily death;
Like a volcano
she expells her
smelting lava in
her silent cries;
Her pains burn
her body, as if
thousand crackers
erupt together ;
Being seeded
with her blood,
but how harvested,
she only knows!
Hopes in Ashes 53
COLONIZER AND COLONIZED
You and I both make the world exist
You and I both constitute
Half and half of the human race
Equal forces of Indigenous
How it happened then?
You holding the prime position
And I only relative to you
In the hierarchy of sexes
Why this distortion of Nature?
You looming large as 'Absolute'
And I 'secondary one'
In the co-existence of two genders
Where this colonization come from?
You in the role of colonizer
And I the colonized one
In the formation of mankind
Hopes in Ashes 55
COLONIZER AND COLONIZED
You and I both make the world exist
You and I both constitute
Half and half of the human race
Equal forces of Indigenous
How it happened then?
You holding the prime position
And I only relative to you
In the hierarchy of sexes
Why this distortion of Nature?
You looming large as 'Absolute'
And I 'secondary one'
In the co-existence of two genders
Where this colonization come from?
You in the role of colonizer
And I the colonized one
In the formation of mankind
Hopes in Ashes 55
HOPES IN ASHES
I did stand up I keep on hanging like an appendix
But every time I found I feel all disjointed inside
Everything pulling me down But the moment I am in demand
Education, Politics, Art, Love I gather all of me together
I expected so many things I spend days stubbed in ashtray
To have happened to me I spend nights devoid of everything
But nothing ever happened to me But the moment I pick up a pen
Except the two children and one marriage To write myself, to put myself into text
I looked through the barred window There I try to recover the expenses
The crimson colour of my hopes To shatter the framework of institutions
Slowly dwindling down To break up the silence with laughter
Like the setting sun There I feel myself
A Newly Born Woman
I tried to grab my real self in dark room
But the artificial lights embraced me
I wonder at the emptiness
Where work is work's on defeat
Hopes in Ashes 57
HOPES IN ASHES
I did stand up I keep on hanging like an appendix
But every time I found I feel all disjointed inside
Everything pulling me down But the moment I am in demand
Education, Politics, Art, Love I gather all of me together
I expected so many things I spend days stubbed in ashtray
To have happened to me I spend nights devoid of everything
But nothing ever happened to me But the moment I pick up a pen
Except the two children and one marriage To write myself, to put myself into text
I looked through the barred window There I try to recover the expenses
The crimson colour of my hopes To shatter the framework of institutions
Slowly dwindling down To break up the silence with laughter
Like the setting sun There I feel myself
A Newly Born Woman
I tried to grab my real self in dark room
But the artificial lights embraced me
I wonder at the emptiness
Where work is work's on defeat
Hopes in Ashes 57
A BIRD OF GRANITE
I crave to have wings
Open them and fly around
As often do petals
When tossed in open air
I long to sing joyously
Each note rising out of water
As often do waves
When tossed in open air
I wish to think seamlessly
Each thought rising out of innocence
As often do doves
When tossed in open air
I find the dove inside me
Surrounded by shabby world
I find my notes
Rising out of sad aching night
I find my wings
Motionless as of A Bird of Granite
Hopes in Ashes 59
A BIRD OF GRANITE
I crave to have wings
Open them and fly around
As often do petals
When tossed in open air
I long to sing joyously
Each note rising out of water
As often do waves
When tossed in open air
I wish to think seamlessly
Each thought rising out of innocence
As often do doves
When tossed in open air
I find the dove inside me
Surrounded by shabby world
I find my notes
Rising out of sad aching night
I find my wings
Motionless as of A Bird of Granite
Hopes in Ashes 59
FONDLING AND CARESSING
We entered into each-other’s world
Wistfully with dreams in eyes
I longed for pats and caresses
My wish crumbled down
As you could unleash nothing more than skin
The young womanly energy inside
Assisted me and refrained
My being from being crushed.
We entered into the world of fertility
Bringing forth our offsprings into creation
I longed for cooperation in their upbringing
My wish crumbled down
As you fondled them as per your fondness
The young motherly energy inside
Assisted me and refrained
My motherhood from being crushed.
Now when we entered into the world of wrinkles
Circumscribing our lives around each other
We both longed for togetherness
Our wish redeemed fully
As your need made you
Sensitive and perceptive
Your patting strokes and touches
Rejuvenate and refrain
My young spirit from being crushed
Hopes in Ashes 61
FONDLING AND CARESSING
We entered into each-other’s world
Wistfully with dreams in eyes
I longed for pats and caresses
My wish crumbled down
As you could unleash nothing more than skin
The young womanly energy inside
Assisted me and refrained
My being from being crushed.
We entered into the world of fertility
Bringing forth our offsprings into creation
I longed for cooperation in their upbringing
My wish crumbled down
As you fondled them as per your fondness
The young motherly energy inside
Assisted me and refrained
My motherhood from being crushed.
Now when we entered into the world of wrinkles
Circumscribing our lives around each other
We both longed for togetherness
Our wish redeemed fully
As your need made you
Sensitive and perceptive
Your patting strokes and touches
Rejuvenate and refrain
My young spirit from being crushed
Hopes in Ashes 61
GROWTH
I have tried to grow
By living up my dreams
I have moved out
From domestic sphere
Now I know enough commerce
Of the daily give and take
I have developed
A new relationship with the cosmos
I thought I would sing
Of day bright with glory
And Lo! I am empowered
By loss of Grace
My identity and My Face
Hopes in Ashes 63
GROWTH
I have tried to grow
By living up my dreams
I have moved out
From domestic sphere
Now I know enough commerce
Of the daily give and take
I have developed
A new relationship with the cosmos
I thought I would sing
Of day bright with glory
And Lo! I am empowered
By loss of Grace
My identity and My Face
Hopes in Ashes 63
VOICE EMBEDDED IN SILENCE
My silence guards the memory of unknown
Speech of my mind makes me aware of Myself
Wisdom of my body warns me of the barbed wires
This state of silence is my grit
Empowering me with a perfect equilibrium
My preoccupation with my own self
Is intense and profound
I celebrate the power of wordlessness
And express Myself Nonchalantly
Hopes in Ashes 65
VOICE EMBEDDED IN SILENCE
My silence guards the memory of unknown
Speech of my mind makes me aware of Myself
Wisdom of my body warns me of the barbed wires
This state of silence is my grit
Empowering me with a perfect equilibrium
My preoccupation with my own self
Is intense and profound
I celebrate the power of wordlessness
And express Myself Nonchalantly
Hopes in Ashes 65
MY PREVALENCE
I pervaded in the covers of Poetry
All absent from the history
I dominated the lives of kings and knights
But a slave of one whose ring parents forced upon my finger
In literature, most profound
Most inspired words fell from my lips
In life I could scarcely spell or hardly read
In thoughts deified as the mother earth
In house a property of husband
Hopes in Ashes 67
MY PREVALENCE
I pervaded in the covers of Poetry
All absent from the history
I dominated the lives of kings and knights
But a slave of one whose ring parents forced upon my finger
In literature, most profound
Most inspired words fell from my lips
In life I could scarcely spell or hardly read
In thoughts deified as the mother earth
In house a property of husband
Hopes in Ashes 67
A WOMAN OR A GENIUS
I am equally adventurous and
Imaginative as you are
As agog to see the world as you are
But I know
I cannot stroll the street at
Mid night as you can
Nor can I have a dinner
In a tavern as you can
Chastity, A Fetish prevents
Me only from expressing
Myself freely not you
Is my spirit destined to be
Buried at the domain of home
Oh! Yes I know...........
Women are women first,
Genius second
Hopes in Ashes 69
A WOMAN OR A GENIUS
I am equally adventurous and
Imaginative as you are
As agog to see the world as you are
But I know
I cannot stroll the street at
Mid night as you can
Nor can I have a dinner
In a tavern as you can
Chastity, A Fetish prevents
Me only from expressing
Myself freely not you
Is my spirit destined to be
Buried at the domain of home
Oh! Yes I know...........
Women are women first,
Genius second
Hopes in Ashes 69
VOCATION
I also wanted to have vocation
Vocation I thought Heaven has set me
I also wished to gratify
My intellectual and creative self
How foolish was I?
To have the wrong notion of vocation
Slowly it dawned to me
The real meaning of a women's vocation
A woman's true vocation
To further the interest and
Honour of man self effacingly
My passivity is an applauded quality
Submission in a cheerful and humble manner
Is the highest valued feminine vocation
Hopes in Ashes 71
VOCATION
I also wanted to have vocation
Vocation I thought Heaven has set me
I also wished to gratify
My intellectual and creative self
How foolish was I?
To have the wrong notion of vocation
Slowly it dawned to me
The real meaning of a women's vocation
A woman's true vocation
To further the interest and
Honour of man self effacingly
My passivity is an applauded quality
Submission in a cheerful and humble manner
Is the highest valued feminine vocation
Hopes in Ashes 71
EQUAL SPACE
I donot want to run
Legging you behind
I donot want to take long strides
Making you a chaser
I donot want to raise my voice
To suppress your words
I donot want to make
Your absence My Monsoon
I only want to walk beside you
I only want to have an equal space
I only want to express my soul
I only want to make you my Spring
Hopes in Ashes 73
EQUAL SPACE
I donot want to run
Legging you behind
I donot want to take long strides
Making you a chaser
I donot want to raise my voice
To suppress your words
I donot want to make
Your absence My Monsoon
I only want to walk beside you
I only want to have an equal space
I only want to express my soul
I only want to make you my Spring
Hopes in Ashes 73
MOUTH SHUT !
The weeping
words
of my verses,
The creeping
abstracts
of my thoughts;
Like woman of
my land
being a draught
of sand;
Sigh secretly,
scream silently,
and speak the
language of
mouth shut with
stiched lips.
Hopes in Ashes 75
MOUTH SHUT !
The weeping
words
of my verses,
The creeping
abstracts
of my thoughts;
Like woman of
my land
being a draught
of sand;
Sigh secretly,
scream silently,
and speak the
language of
mouth shut with
stiched lips.
Hopes in Ashes 75
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