ADMN 233v11

ADMN 233v11
Writing in Organizations

About ADMN 233

Introduction

Course Development Team

Author: Dr. Pierre Wilhelm
Editor: Shirley Stashko
Visual Presentation: Faculty of Business Web Design Team

Opening Comments

ADMN 233 Writing in Organizations is a course for students who wish to improve their
written communication as it applies to the workplace. Writing in an organization is similar to
other types of writing in that it is a creative process and a communicative act. Writing in
organizations involves a problem-solving process requiring that one analyze situations,
make decisions, and inform others of those decisions.

When you complete this course, you should be able to

 write correspondence for a business reader by keeping in mind your institution’s needs.

 apply a systematic process to plan, organize, and revise business messages.

 write routine messages that answer a reader's specific needs and that conform to
established rules of writing. Such messages include e-mail messages, memos, and
faxes.

 write more demanding messages such as routine letters and goodwill messages,
persuasive and sales messages, and negative (bad news) messages.

 plan and prepare complex messages such as business reports, proposals, and formal
reports.

Course Overview

ADMN 233 is based on Chapters 5 to 13 of your course textbook. The course is divided into
three sections (corresponding to textbook Units 2 to 4).

You should complete Assignment 1, the diagnostic writing assessment, and
submit it for grading before you begin working on Section 1. You will automatically
receive a 6% credit for completing Assignment 1.

All quizzes and assignments are located on this ADMN 233 Web site. You can access the
quizzes and assignments in the Evaluation block on the course home page. However, the
quizzes will not be available until the first day of your course contract.

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Quizzes contain true/false and multiple-choice questions and are marked automatically. You
will complete each of the four assignments by creating a word document and submitting it
according to the instructions provided in the assignment.

Take your time completing this course. Progress to the next chapter only after you have
completed the readings, activities, and quiz for each chapter and compared your writing
with the recommended answers. Consult your Academic Expert if you are in doubt about
course instructions or procedures.

Learning Materials

This course uses electronic materials as resources for learning.

ADMN 233 This course Web site acts as your course study guide. It provides links to
Web Site relevant information and connects you to Athabasca University’s
administrative support services as well. This site also links you to an online
assessment site where you can complete formal quizzes and assignments, as
well as a sample schedule to follow to complete the course, information about
how your work is assessed and graded, a guide to the reading and writing
activities you should complete, and recommended answers to writing
activities.

Textbook Guffey, M. E., Rhodes, K., & Rogin, P. (2010). Business communication:
Process and product (3rd brief Can. ed.). Toronto, ON: Nelson Education Ltd.

Note: This course has transitioned from a print textbook to an electronic
textbook (eText). For this reason, you may notice a discrepancy between the
textbook page numbers given in the course and the page numbers in the
eText.

You can access the eText through the link on the course front page. You can
also purchase a print version of the textbook from the publisher at a
discounted rate.

Textbook The textbook companion Web site provides a practice exercise called Test
Companion Yourself and a Crossword Puzzle for each chapter. You will be directed to this
Web Site Web site within the lessons.

A link to this site may also be found in the centre of the course homepage.

AU's Write Consult writing resources located on Athabasca University’s Write Site to

Site prepare your texts.

As well, if need be, consult a Write Site Writing Coach or your course
instructor to help you better prepare your assignments.

The Write Site provides remedial help, such as

 assistance from Write Site coaches
 grammar rules for review
 remedial writing exercises
 citation rules and exercises

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 remedial help for students whose native language is not English.

In ADMN 233 , you are to complete a diagnostic writing assessment (Assignment 1), three
more assignments, nine quizzes, and a final examination. If you fail to submit an
assignment or quiz, you will receive a grade of 0% for that assignment or quiz. To receive
credit for ADMN 233, you must achieve a grade of at least “D” (50%) on the final
examination and a minimum overall course grade of “D” (50%). The following table
summarizes the evaluation activities for ADMN 233 :

Activity Credit Weight When to
Complete
Assignment 1 6% of final grade
(Diagnostic Writing Assessment) 15% of final grade in Week 1
Assignment 2 20% of final grade
Assignment 3 20% of final grade after Chapter 7
Assignment 4 after Chapter 11
9 Quizzes @ 1% each 9% of final grade after Chapter 13
30% of final grade after each chapter
Final Examination 100% of final grade after Assignment
4
Total

Week(s) Activities
1  Review the material in the online Student Handbook.
 Familiarize yourself with all of your course materials.
 Complete and submit Assignment 1 (the diagnostic writing

assessment).

2–3  Chapter 5: Writing Process Phase 1: Analyze, Anticipate, Adapt. Complete all
Chapter 5 Readings and Activities.

 Complete Quiz 1.
 Contact the Student Support Centre if you have any questions about the

course.

4–5  Read Chapter 6: Writing Process Phase 2: Research, Organize, Compose.
Complete all Chapter 6 Readings and Activities.

 Complete Quiz 2.
 Check Course Updates regularly.

6  Read Chapter 7: Writing Process Phase 3: Revise, Proofread, Evaluate.

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Complete all Chapter 7 Readings and Activities.
 Complete Quiz 3.
 Contact the Student Support Centre if you have any questions about the

course.

7–8  Complete and submit Assignment 2.
 Contact the Student Support Centre if you have any questions.

9–10  Read Chapter 8: Routine E-Mail Messages and Memos. Complete all Chapter
8 Readings and Activities.

 Complete Quiz 4.
 Check Course Updates regularly.

11–12  Read Chapter 9: Routine Letters and Goodwill Messages. Complete all
Chapter 9 Readings and Activities.

 Complete Quiz 5.
 Contact the Student Support Centre if you have any questions.

13  Read Chapter 10: Persuasive and Sales Messages. Complete all Chapter 10
Readings and Activities.

 Complete Quiz 6.
 Check Course Updates regularly.

14  Read Chapter 11: Negative Messages. Complete all Chapter 11 Readings and
Activities.

 Complete Quiz 7.
 Contact the Student Support Centre if you have any questions.

15–16  Complete and submit Assignment 3.
 Contact the Student Support Centre if you have any questions.

17–18  Read Chapter 12: Preparing to Write Business Reports. Complete all Chapter
12 Readings and Activities.

 Complete Quiz 8.
 Check Course Updates regularly.

19–20  Read Chapter 13: Organizing and Writing Typical Business Reports. Complete
all Chapter 13 Readings and Activities.

 Complete Quiz 9.
 Contact the Student Support Centre if you have any questions.

21-22  Complete and submit Assignment 4.
 Check Course Updates regularly.
 Make arrangements to write the final examination. Refer to the Requesting

an Exam page (link is in the Evaluation block on the course home page) for
procedures and deadlines.

23-26  Prepare for the final examination.
 Contact the Student Support Centre if you have any questions.
 Write the final examination.
 Complete the Course Evaluation Survey located near the bottom of the

course homepage. We appreciate your feedback!

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Congratulations on completing the course!

Applying the 3-x-3 Writing Process

This course teaches a systematic approach to writing; these important steps will help you
produce professional texts and documents. With practice, this process will become routine,
allowing you to approach writing tasks with confidence.

Your course textbook uses a model called the 3-x-3 writing process. In this course, the
lessons, assignments, and final examination require that you reflect and think about
prewriting, writing, and revising.

Phase 1: Prewriting (Preparing to Write)

1. Analyze the situation that you confront.

 What do you want to communicate to a reader or to a group of readers?
 What does a reader need to know, do, or think about?
 How can you communicate this information effectively, clearly, and directly?
 Can your reader or readers act on the information you communicate in a way that

provides the results you hoped for?

1. Sort out facts, ideas, and feelings that you need to clarify before you start writing.

2. Gather the information you need.

Phase 2: Writing (Work with Key Information Your Reader Requires)

1. Organize key information into a loose outline.
2. Check your outline to ensure it presents key information most effectively.
3. Write as clearly and concisely as possible.
4. Learn to recognize several styles for writing business correspondence, including

 author-centred writing (“I” view) and reader-centred writing (“you” view)
 direct text construction (to-the-point) and indirect text construction (delayed impact)
 informative style (factual) and persuasive style (opinionated)
 descriptive writing (“as is”) and reflective writing (“as could or should be”)
 formal (professional) and informal (cordial) tone.

1. Learn to format different types of texts into memos, letters, and short reports, including

 internal and external memos
 informative and persuasive memos
 good news and bad news letters

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 request and reply letters
 testimonial and sales letters
 analytical and informative reports.
Phase 3: Revising (Make Your Text Clear, Concise, Organized, and Readable)
1. Proofread your text for grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors.
2. Evaluate your text to consider whether it meets the goal you want it to reach.

Assignment and Quiz Tips

Lesson Quizzes
 Complete all quizzes online. Remember that these are marked quizzes, not practice
ones.
 Click the Save without submitting button after each page of questions to ensure that
the course server registers your answers.
 Click the Submit all and finish button only after you have answered all quiz questions.
Otherwise, your marker will receive an incomplete quiz.

Assignments
 Assignment 1: Prepare as a single word file.
 Assignments 2, 3, and 4: Prepare each assignment as a single word file, using the
assignment template provided within each assignment.

Marking Guide

Your marker will use the following five categories to assess your written assignments:

In determining a grade for Content, markers look for evidence that you

 clearly understand the topic.
 have analyzed the topic completely (given the length and scope of the assignment).
 are aware of your audience and purpose.
 use appropriate quotations (where relevant).
 use original ideas and expression.
 provide appropriate evidence of reading and research (where relevant).

In determining a grade for Organization, markers look for

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 clear, appropriate, and logical structure within each paragraph and within the whole
assignment.

 an appropriate thesis statement and good main ideas at the paragraph level.

 an introduction and conclusion (as sentences at the paragraph level; as paragraphs at
the essay level).

 effective transitions within sentences, between sentences, and between paragraphs.

 a variety of sentence structures.

 your awareness of the audience.

In determining a grade for Mechanics, markers look for

 correct spelling.
 correct punctuation and capitalization.
 legible writing or readable text formatting.

In determining a grade for Grammar, markers look for

 correct application of grammar rules.
 proper syntax.

In determining a grade for Style, markers look for evidence that you

 are sure and in control as a writer.
 adopt an appropriate stance.
 chose a style appropriate to the content, subject, purpose, and audience.
 present an effective voice that is consistent and sustained.
 use imagination, creativity, intent, and innovation effectively.
 use appropriate expression and vocabulary.
 adhere to appropriate rhetorical principles and format.

Questions of Style

What is Good Writing?

Good writing for organizations is clear, concise, simple, and to the point.

Clear communication in organizations demands good writing that

 uses direct sentences. Begin with a subject, followed by an active verb and an object
(subject + verb + object)

 communicates ideas, facts, and feelings to a reader clearly and without overstatement

 communicates information using a minimum number of words to make a point

 uses words for their precise meaning

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 leaves no doubt or confusion in the reader’s mind about the intent of a message

 describes the course of action the writer wants the reader (or group of readers) to
follow

 lets ideas and facts speak for themselves, rather than drawing attention to the writer’s
style

 guides readers through complex information using graphic charts and images

 organizes information with headings as reference points

 uses typography and text formatting to guide the reader

 uses parallelism to create coherent patterns and provide balance to a text.

What is Poor Writing?

Poor writing for organizations

 emphasizes nouns, pronouns, and adjectives, rather than active verbs

 uses indirect sentence constructions, passive voice, and filler expressions such as “there
is” or “it is said that”

 includes vague abstract noun concepts.

Preparing for the Final Examination

Weight: 30% of final grade
Time allotted: 3 hours
Delivery: online
Exam Format: written response

The ADMN 233 final examination is to be taken after you have completed Chapter 13 and
received grades for all nine chapter quizzes and the four assignments. The final examination
is a closed-book examination that covers material from the entire course. There are no
multiple-choice or true/false questions on the examination.

The final examination requires you to complete a series of writing tasks in the form of
e-mails, memos, letters, and business reports based on workplace scenarios. This
examination consists of four parts that test your ability to outline, write, assess, and revise
texts. It covers material from the entire course.

You will write your final examination in an online environment with the same functionality
as Question 5 in the Demo Exam.

This online exam environment provides some formatting tools; you may want to experiment
with these before you write your exam. However, you will not be graded on how you
format your responses. Note as well that since this is a writing course, there is no spell
check feature available in the online exam environment.

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In this examination, you must demonstrate the ability to practise some or all of the
following skills efficiently:

 Apply the 3-x-3 writing process properly.
 Read scenarios carefully to make sense of their key ideas.
 Follow instructions that require you to format and structure texts for a specific purpose

and a specific reader.
 Follow an appropriate direct or indirect style of writing.
 Structure your text to emphasize a “you-view” rather than an "I-view."
 Inform or persuade your reader as instructed.
 Provide recommendations and conclusions that the reader can clearly act on.
 Write in an active or passive voice as the context demands.
 Write clear problem questions and statements of purpose if requested to.
 Assess the strengths and weaknesses of business texts.
 Revise poorly written texts.
 Outline key aspects of a business letter or report.

To prepare to write the examination, make sure that you gain a thorough knowledge of the
main forms of business communication you studied in this course. In particular,

 complete all chapter quizzes.
 complete all course assignments and review the comments your marker sends you.
 complete all assigned chapter exercises and compare your writing to the sample

solutions provided.
 answer the Test Yourself questions on the textbook companion Web site.

To pass the course, you must obtain a grade of "D" (50%) or better on the final
examination and a composite course grade of at least "D" (50%).

ADMN 233v11
Writing in Organizations

Section 1 The 3-x-3 Writing Process

Chapter 5: Analyze, Anticipate, Adapt

Learning Objectives

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After completing this chapter, you will be able to

1. identify three basics of business writing and summarize the three phases of the 3-x-3
writing process.

2. explain how the writing process may be altered and how it is affected by team projects
and technology.

3. clarify what is involved in analyzing a writing task and selecting a communication
channel.

4. describe anticipating and profiling the audience for a message.

5. specify six writing techniques that help communicators adapt messages to the task and
audience.

6. explain why communicators must adapt their writing in four high-risk areas.

Introduction

Unit Two of Business Communication: Process and Product focuses on the process of
business writing. This process is approached systematically using a model called the 3-x-3
writing process. Using this systematic approach will help you to think through the important
steps in producing quality business documents. With practice, this process will become a
routine part of your writing, allowing you to approach any business writing task with
confidence.

In Chapter 5, you will examine the first phase of the 3-×-3 writing process—prewriting. In
particular, you will focus on

 approaching the writing process systematically

 adapting and altering the writing process

 analyzing the writing task to identify your purpose and select the best channel (e.g.,
letter, e-mail, report) to deliver your message

 anticipating the audience to be sure you understand the people receiving the message

 adapting the message to ensure it is appropriate for both the task and the audience.

By paying close attention to the Prewriting Phase, you will be able to plan a message that is
correctly focused on both the writing task and the intended audience. This planning will
help you craft an effective, focused message when you move on to the Writing Phase.

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Readings and Activities

How can you use the reading activity
3-x-3 writing process to
improve your From the print textbook, on pages 92 to 93, read the
documents? following topic:

 Approaching the Writing Process Systematically

writing activity

Complete Critical Thinking 2 from the end-of-chapter
materials in your print textbook and compare your
response with the Recommended Answers to Critical
Thinking.

What are the advantages reading activity
and disadvantages of
increased teamwork and From the print textbook, on pages 93 to 97, read the
technology for you as a following topics:
business communicator?
 Adapting and Altering the Writing Process
Why might you choose
one type of business  Writing Process Phase 1: Analyze
document over another
(e.g., a hand-written writing activity
note rather than an
e-mail)? Complete Activity 5.2 from the end-of-chapter
materials in your print textbook and compare your
response with the Recommended Answers to Activities.

How do business reading activity
audiences (executives,
employees, customers) From the print textbook, on pages 97 to 98, read the
differ from each other? following topic:

 Writing Process Phase 1: Anticipate

writing activity

Complete Activity 5.3 from the end-of-chapter
materials in your print textbook and compare your
response with the Recommended Answers to Activities.

Complete Critical Thinking 1 from the end-of-chapter
materials in your print textbook and compare your
response with the Recommended Answers to Critical

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Thinking.

How might a better reading activity
understanding of your
audience change the From the print textbook, on pages 98 to 104, read the
way you write a following topics:
business document?
 Writing Process Phase 1: Adapt

 Checklist for Adapting a Message to Its Audience

writing activity

Complete Activities 5.4, 5.5, 5.6, 5.7, and 5.8 from
the end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended
Answers to Activities.

How can you minimize reading activity
negative legal
consequences arising From the print textbook, on pages 104 to 106, read the
from your business following topic:
documents?
 Adapting to Legal Responsibilities

writing activity

Complete Activities 5.9 (parts a to e only), 5.10,
and 5.11 from the end-of-chapter materials in your
print textbook and compare your responses with the
Recommended Answers to Activities.

Complete Critical Thinking 3 and 4 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended
Answers to Critical Thinking.

optional activity

On the textbook companion Web site, click Crossword
Puzzles in the right-hand menu and complete the
crossword puzzle for Chapter 5.

Work through these review
activities to review and
practise what you have Read the Summary of Learning Objectives at the end of
learned in Chapter 5. the chapter.
These activities will help

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you prepare for Complete the Chapter Review from the end-of-chapter
Assignments and materials in your print textbook and compare your
Chapter Quizzes. responses with the Recommended Answers to Chapter
Review.

On the textbook companion Web site, locate Student
Resources on the right-hand side of the page and click
Test Yourself to informally test your understanding of
writing rules and key concepts taught in this chapter.

Then locate Quiz 1 by clicking Quizzes (in the
Evaluation block on the course homepage) to formally
test your knowledge of these rules and key concepts.
The mark you achieve on this quiz will contribute to
your final grade in the course.

Recommended Answers to Activities

5.2 Selecting Communication Channels (Obj. 3)

a. Write a letter because it provides a written record of correspondence sent outside your
organization.

b. A face-to-face meeting would be expensive and time consuming. A more efficient
alternative is a video conference or teleconference.

c. Most global transactions such as this are conducted by fax, which is cheap, fast, and
provides a written record. E-mail would also be appropriate if you have the customer’s
address.

d. Because considerable data will be involved, you would write a report to be submitted
internally.

e. Because the training session involves a future date, send a written rather than an oral
message. Use e-mail or a hard-copy memo instead of a face-to-face, telephone, or voice
mail message.

5.3 Analyzing Audiences (Obj. 4)

a. Because the primary reader is your sales manager, you should know what kind of
communication format and content he expects. But he may not know much about the
customer and specifically what the customer is demanding. Since the manager is
familiar with the business, you can use jargon or references that outsiders might not
understand. You can expect the receiver to be receptive to prospective new business;
perhaps he’s willing to make concessions to please this new customer. However, you
should also remember that the sales manager may want to forward your message to a
higher executive. Thus, be sure to fill in details and use fairly formal language.

b. The primary reader will probably be a busy human resources director, an educated,
experienced individual who has doubtless read many letters of application and resumés.
Since the job is advertised, you would expect the reader to be neutral or positive toward

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your letter. Because your relationship is professional, your tone should be formal, yet
friendly.

c. The primary reader is your boss, but a secondary reader may be your boss’s superior, if
further approval is sought. The relationship is both personal and professional. Since
your boss probably has no knowledge of the computer class, you would want to describe
the class in detail and offer well-planned reasoning explaining why your proposal would
benefit both the company and you. You might expect a negative response.

d. A targeted audience of executives means that you have some expectations about their
income, education, status, and interests. You can use language that educated readers
would comprehend. Because the readers probably know little about the subject, you’ll
have to provide persuasive arguments and data. You might expect a negative response.

e. The primary reader is the credit applicant, and the relationship is professional. You don’t
know a great deal about the reader, but you would expect her or him to appreciate
respectful, courteous treatment. The response will be negative; your approach will
probably be indirect.

5.4 Reader Benefits and the “You” View (Obj. 5)

a. For just $300 each, you can spend three days in Las Vegas, where you will enjoy deluxe
accommodations, the “City Lights” show, and selected meals.

b. You can attend the two-day workshop.

c. To improve your writing skills, enrol in our in-house training program.

d. You can now purchase Dell computers at discounted prices at the student bookstore.

e. For your safety, you may rent power equipment when you have demonstrated
proficiency in its use.

5.5 Language Bias (Obj. 3)

a. Skilled assistants proofread their bosses’ documents and catch any errors.

b. CyberSystems hired Jamal Alexander for the position of project manager.

c. Because Kevin uses a wheelchair, we look for restaurants without stairs.

d. All employees must wear their ID badges on the job. OR
Every employee must wear his or her ID badge on the job. OR
Every employee must wear an ID badge on the job.

e. Some restaurants have a special menu for people over 65 (or for senior citizens).

5.6 Positive Expression (Obj. 5)

a. You’ll receive your $50 rebate if you follow each requirement.

b. In the message you left at our Web site, you mention that you returned a printer.

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c. We are sending you a replacement blade for your food processor. Please read page 18
of your operator’s manual to learn how to attach this blade to give you effective
performance.

d. Please send us your social insurance number so that we can process your application.

e. Construction will begin when the building plans are approved.
5.7 Courteous Expression (Obj. 5)

a. Please call this 800 number immediately to activate your debit card.

b. Please record my January 6 payment of $500 to my account. I’ve attached my previous
letters describing the problem.

c. As departmental manager, you can help reduce air pollution by organizing a car pool.

d. To the Staff: So that paper jams won’t prevent your full use of the copier, please review
the instructions for removing jammed paper found on page 12 of the operating manual.

e. You are covered for all accidents that occur within Canada.

5.8 Familiar Words (Obj. 5)

a. The salary we are offering is equal to other managers’ pay.
b. To speed approval of this agreement, we ask you to vote yes.
c. While talking with the manager, I learned that you plan to end our agreement.
d. Did the steering problem appear after the recall?
e. As you requested, we will question our agent.

5.9 Precise Words (Obj. 5)

a. When replying to e-mail, (bring in, include, put) enough of the old message for (
someone, the person, the recipient ) to recognize the original note.

b. For a (hard, long, complicated ) e-mail message, (make, create, have ) the note in
your word processing program.

c. If an e-mail (thing, catch, glitch ] interferes while writing, you can easily (get, have,
retrieve) your message.

d. We plan to (acknowledge, publicize, applaud ) the work of exemplary employees.

e. Ryan’s excellent report has (a lot of, many, a warehouse of ) relevant facts.

5.10 Legal Language (Obj. 6)

a. We have inspected the septic system and will send a complete report. (review, study)
b. Our goal is to assure completion of the project on schedule. (facilitate)
c. We will determine the amount of stress for each supporting column. (evaluate, assess,

analyze)

5.11 Clear Writing

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a. The following two articles provided effective information: Phil Venditti, Let’s Be Clear:
Use Your Head to Make Point, Everett Business Journal , August 2003, and Johan
Rindegard, Use Clear Writing to Show You Mean Business, InfoWorld , 22, November
1999.

b. Clear writing streamlines procedures, makes it easier to train employees, and increases
staff productivity and morale. It reduces confusion, complaints, and claims; and it
improves customer satisfaction. It increases sales and raises a company’s standing in
the marketplace.

Example 1: The Federal Communications Commission rewrote its regulations for citizen
band radios in plain language. As a result, it was able almost immediately to reassign
the five staff members who’d been hired previously just to respond to complaints and
questions from the public.

Example 2: Before Federal Express overhauled its operations manuals in 1995, readers
searched for an average of five minutes to find information and found it only 53 percent
of the time. When the new manuals appeared, organized more logically and containing
lots of graphics and tables, the average search time dropped to 3.6 minutes and the
success rate improved to 80 percent.

c. People can learn to write more clearly by considering their audience, anticipating reader
reaction, outlining the message, writing a draft, and editing the draft. More suggestions
are available in the articles.

Recommended Answers to Critical Thinking

1. Many receivers of business messages are unknown to senders. Writers of
business letters and people making presentations rarely know their receivers. But
senders can learn as much as possible about receivers by asking questions, doing
research, and putting themselves in the shoes of the members of the audience.
Particularly if you are trying to persuade people to take action or change views,
you must strive to find out what stake they have in the idea you are presenting
and what might motivate them. Knowing (or guessing) a reader’s educational
background may tell you what level of language to use. Knowledge of the
professional background of a receiver helps you determine how much detail or
jargon to include. The status of the receiver (job duties, rank, interpersonal
relationship) helps you make decisions regarding how to send the message, what
to include, and the wording. Knowledge of attitudes and values also can guide
you to more effective messages.

2. The 3-x-3 writing process helps communicators solve problems, particularly
those that require a product as their outcome. The three phases of the process
are so comprehensive that they cover, with a few modifications, all aspects of
written and oral communication. To be successful communicators, students will
go through the same processes of analyzing, anticipating, adapting, and so forth,
for all their communication activities.

3. Many business communicators are untrained in the techniques of successful
communication. They are unaware of goals such as analyzing the audience and

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adapting messages to receivers. They are rushed to send messages without time
for thinking of the effect these messages have on their receivers. Some of
today’s technology may also contribute to poor writing in that messages are so
easy to dash off that little time is taken to plan them and revise them.
Communication experts think that we’re seeing more poor writing and
miscommunication as a result of the casualness of e-mail and fax technologies.

4. The English language is experiencing a period of rapid change as it responds to
changes in social attitudes and innovative technology. To avoid alienating readers
and listeners, many businesspeople are trying hard to be particularly sensitive to
avoid the appearance of bias. Bias, of course, is any prejudgment toward another
person or group—on some basis other than fact. At times our language, even if
used unintentionally, suggests bias. Most of us would not use derisive or
insensitive terms knowingly. But some references may include a hint of bias that
we don’t always recognize. Students will want to be alert to those terms
mentioned in the text, as well as to others that may carry emotional baggage.
Examples: cleaning woman (cleaner, custodian); female engineer (omit female );
man-hours (labour hours).

Recommended Answers to Chapter Review

1. Explain how writing business messages differs from writing academic
compositions and term papers. (Obj. 1)

Business writing is purposeful, economical, and reader oriented. Conciseness is
important. The goal is to express rather than impress . (textbook, p. 92)

2. Describe the components in each stage of the 3-x-3 writing process. (Obj. 2)

Phase 1 (prewriting) consists of analyzing the message, anticipating the audience,
and considering ways to adapt the message to the audience. Phase 2 (writing)
involves researching the topic, organizing the material, and composing the message.
Phase 3 (revising) includes revising, proofreading, and evaluating the message.
(textbook, p. 93)

3. Name three instances in which collaborative writing is necessary. (Obj. 2)

Collaborative writing is necessary for big tasks, items with short deadlines, and team
projects that require the expertise or consensus of many people. (textbook, pp. 94–
95)

4. Why is writing shared documents frustrating, and what software tools
make the editing task easier? (Obj. 4)

Writing shared documents can be frustrating because it’s difficult to identify different
versions of a document and it’s hard to recognize who made what comment or
change on a document. Microsoft Word provides the following editing tools to ease
collaborative writing: highlight, change colour, track changes, and insert comments.
(textbook, p. 95)

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5. List five factors to consider when selecting a communication channel. (Obj.
3)

Five factors to consider are

 importance of message
 amount and speed of feedback required
 necessity of a permanent record
 cost of the channel
 degree of formality desired.

(textbook, p. 96)

6. Why should you profile your audience before composing a message? (Obj. 4)

Profiling the audience before composing a message ensures a message that will
appeal to its reader. Thinking about the receiver forces the writer to consider ways
to adapt the message to the receiver’s views, background, culture, education, and
needs. By having a picture of the receiver in mind, the writer is more likely to
produce a message that will be effective and achieve the outcome desired.
(textbook, pp. 97–98)

7. How can a writer emphasize reader benefits? (Obj. 5)

Writers can emphasize reader benefits by putting themselves in the position of the
reader. How is this message going to save the receiver money, time, or effort? The
message should be written from the perspective of the reader. (textbook, p. 99)

8. When is the “you” view appropriate, and when is it inappropriate?. (Obj. 5)

The “you” view is appropriate when it focuses on reader benefits. It is inappropriate
when it is used to manipulate or when it conveys a sense of blame (e.g., You
neglected to include necessary information.). (textbook, pp. 99–100)

9. What is bias-free language? Give original examples. (Obj. 5)

Bias-free language avoids gender, race, ethnicity, age, or disability expressions that
might be hurtful or stereotype people. Bias-free language strives to be inclusive
rather than exclusive. It eliminates words that focus attention on exclusions (e.g.,
lawyer rather than female lawyer ; new teacher rather than new Asian teacher ).
(textbook, pp. 100–101)

10.Name replacements for the following gender-biased terms: waitress,
stewardess, foreman. (Obj. 5)

Waitress = server
Stewardess = flight attendant
Foreman = lead worker

(textbook, p. 100)

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11.Revise the following expression to show more courtesy: "For the last time
I’m warning all staff members that they must use virus-protection
software—or else!" (Obj. 5)

Please use virus-protection software to prevent your computer from being infected.
(textbook, p. 102)

12.What is jargon, and when is it appropriate for business writing? (Obj. 5)

Jargon is specialized or technical language. Use it only when the audience will
understand its meaning. (textbook, p. 103)

13.What’s wrong with using words like commence , mandate , and interrogate ?
(Obj. 5)

Often, more familiar words—such as begin , require , and ask— say the same thing.
You also run the risk that your reader will not understand what these words mean.
(textbook, pp. 102–103)

14.What four information areas generate the most lawsuits? (Obj. 6)

Four information areas that generate the most lawsuits are

 investments
 safety
 marketing
 human resources.

(textbook, pp. 105–106)

15.How can business communicators protect themselves against litigation?
(Obj. 6)

Business communicators can protect themselves against litigation by becoming
aware of laws, being sensitive to how words are interpreted, and being careful with
language. (textbook, p. 104)

Quiz 1

Click Quizzes (in the Evaluation block on the course homepage) to go to Quiz 1 (Chapter
5).

Chapter 6: Research, Organize, Compose

Learning Objectives

After completing this chapter, you will be able to

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1. apply Phase 2 of the 3-x-3 writing process, which begins with formal and informal
methods for researching data and generating ideas.

2. specify how to organize data into lists and alphanumeric or decimal outlines.

3. compare direct and indirect patterns for organizing ideas.

4. discuss composing the first draft of a message, focusing on techniques for creating
effective sentences.

5. define paragraph and describe three classic paragraph plans and techniques for
composing meaningful paragraphs.

Introduction

So far, you have used the first phase of the 3-x-3 writing process to analyze your writing
task, anticipate your audience’s reaction, and adapt your message to match the situation.

In Chapter 6, you will continue to the second phase of the 3-×-3 writing process—writing.
Here, you will focus on

 researching the writing task to collect all the information required to write a complete
document

 organizing the information to group related ideas and to create a logical and appropriate
sequence of information for the audience

 composing the first draft of the document to clearly convey the intended message using
effective sentences and paragraphs.

As you work through these steps, you will learn specific strategies for effectively presenting
information to different types of audiences. You will also examine some basic principles of
creating effective sentences and paragraphs.

Readings and Activities

How do formal and reading activity
informal research differ?
When is each most From the print textbook, on pages 112 to 118, read the
appropriate? following topics:

Why is it important that

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information be presented  Writing Process Phase 2: Research
to readers in an  Writing Process Phase 2: Organize
organized fashion?

writing activity

Complete Activity 6.3 from the end-of-chapter materials
in your print textbook and compare your response with
the Recommended Answers to Activities.

Complete Critical Thinking 1 from the end-of-chapter
materials in your print textbook and compare your
response with the Recommended Answers to Critical
Thinking.

What are the advantages reading activity
and disadvantages of the
direct and indirect From the print textbook, on pages 118 to 121, read the
patterns of organizing following topic:
ideas? When is each
pattern most  Organizing Ideas into Patterns
appropriate?
writing activity

Complete Critical Thinking 2 from the end-of-chapter
materials in your print textbook and compare your
response with the Recommended Answers to Critical
Thinking.

What problems can lead reading activity
to ineffective sentences?
How can these problems From the print textbook, on pages 121 to 125, read the
be resolved? following topic:

What are the advantages  Writing Process Phase 2: Compose
and disadvantages of the
direct, indirect, and writing activity
pivoting paragraph
Complete Activities 6.6, 6.7, 6.8 and 6.9 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended Answers
to Activities.

reading activity

From the print textbook, on pages 125 to 129, read the
following topics:

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patterns? When is each  Draft Meaningful Paragraphs
pattern most
appropriate?  Checklist for Composing Sentences and Paragraphs

writing activity

Complete Activities 6.1, 6.10, and 6.11 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended Answers
to Activities.

Complete Critical Thinking 3 and 4 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended Answers
to Critical Thinking.

optional activity

On the textbook companion Web site, click Crossword
Puzzles in the right-hand menu and complete the
crossword puzzle for Chapter 6.

Work through these review
activities to review and
practise what you have Read the Summary of Learning Objectives at the end of
learned in Chapter 6. the chapter.
These activities will help
you prepare for Complete the Chapter Review from the end-of-chapter
Assignments and Chapter materials in your print textbook and compare your
Quizzes. responses with the Recommended Answers to Chapter
Review.

On the textbook companion Web site, locate Student
Resources on the right-hand side of the page and click
Test Yourself to informally test your understanding of
writing rules and key concepts taught in this chapter.

Then locate Quiz 2 by clicking Quizzes (in the Evaluation
block on the course homepage) to formally test your
knowledge of these rules and key concepts. The mark you
achieve on this quiz will contribute to your final grade in
the course.

Recommended Answers to Activities

6.1 Document for Analysis (Objs. 3, 4, and 5)

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This poorly organized and written memo is hard to read because the major points
are submerged in a mass of wordy, confusing, and ungrammatical sentences.
Sentence 4 is 54 words long! Sentences 1, 2, and 3 contain passive-voice
constructions. Sentences 2 and 4 contain poor modification; introductory verbal
phrases are not followed by words that can logically be modified. In sentence 2 (
After giving the matter . . . , it ), it appears to be giving the attention. In sentence
4 (To make the best possible choice, SDD . . . ), the illogical modifier is SDD . SDD
is not making the choice. Similar faults appear in the second paragraph. Sentences
6 and 8 both have dangling and misplaced modifiers. This memo could be vastly
improved through organization. The writer should outline three steps in a new
procedure.

6.3 Researching and Outlining “How-to” Techniques for Productive
Brainstorming (Obj. 1)

One possible article about brainstorming is Dean Rieck’s (1999) Session Five: AH
HA! Running a Productive Brainstorming Session, Direct Marketing, 62 (7), 78–79.

Your memo should include an outline such as the following:

I. Before your brainstorming session

A. Select a leader.
B. Define your problem.
C. Create an agenda.
D. Set time limits.
E. Set quotas.
F. Select your group and announce a session.
G. Circulate background information.

II. During your session

A. Review the problem and background information.
B. Establish ground rules.

1. Each participant must contribute ideas, accept ideas of others, or
improve on ideas.

2. No one may criticize or evaluate any idea.
3. No one will hold back ideas.
4. The group will encourage wild, outside-the-box thinking.
5. The goal of the session is quantity, not quality.

C. Take detailed notes.

III. After the session

A. Allow time for the incubation of further ideas.
B. Type and circulate all the ideas generated.
C. Organize or classify the ideas in some fashion for later evaluation.
D. Evaluate the ideas and choose the best.

6.6 Sentence Elements (Obj. 4)

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In the following sentences, underscore and identify dependent clauses (DC),
independent clauses (IC), and phrases (P). Circle subjects and verbs in clauses.

a. We hired talented undergraduates in our intern program.

IC: We hired talented undergraduates
SUB: We
VERB: hired
P: in our intern program

b. If you qualify, you should send an application to us.

DC: If you qualify
SUB: you
VERB: qualify
IC: you should send an application
SUB: you
VERB: should send
P: to us

c. In the summer, interns appreciate a program if it offers a learning experience.

P: In the summer
IC: interns appreciate a program
SUB: interns
VERB: appreciate
P: in the summer
DC: if it offers a learning experience
SUB: it
VERB: offers

6.7 Sentence Length (Obj. 4)

a. Firms with a substantial investment in original research or development of new
products should consider protecting those products with patents. Eventually,
however, all patents expire. What were once trade secrets can become common
knowledge in the industry.

b. As soon as consumers recognize a name associated with a product or service,
that name is entitled to legal protection as a trademark. Consumers may even
create a trademark where none existed. They may create a second trademark
by using a nickname as a source indicator. The name “Coke,” for example, was
legally protected even before it had ever been used by the company.

c. Although no magic formula exists for picking a good trademark name, firms
should avoid picking the first name that pops into someone’s head. Moreover,
they should be aware that unique and arbitrary marks are best. Descriptive
terms such as “car” or “TV repair” are useless. Surnames and geographic
names are also weak because they lack distinction and exclusivity.

6.8 Active and Passive Voice (Obj. 4)

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Converting passive to active voice.

a. Our board created programs so that employees could become volunteers.
b. We encourage employees to take up to five hours a month of paid time to

volunteer.
c. We provide café-style restaurants for employees in our corporate buildings.
d. When we realized that transportation was a problem, we established interoffice

shuttles.
e. MacLean’s magazine named our company in its “100 Best Places to Work.”

Converting active to passive voice.

f. Your DVD cannot be authorized for repair since its warranty period has expired.
g. Cash refunds cannot be given for merchandise purchased over 90 days ago.
h. Non-members are not accepted by ValleyView Golf Course.
i. Resumés and cover letters must be submitted by e-mail.
j. The two columns were added instead of subtracted, thus producing the incorrect

total.

6.9 Dangling and Misplaced Modifiers (Obj. 4)

a. It’s hard to understand why employees with software problems would not go to
our technical support staff.

b. Having found the misplaced file, they ended the search.

c. In his hometown of Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, the candidate announced his
intentions to run for national office.

d. Ignoring the warning prompt on the screen, the operator turned off the
computer, resulting in the loss of data.

e. Using a number of creative search terms, we finally found the Web site.

6.10 Transitional Expressions (Obj. 5)

The transitional expressions employed in these sentences depend largely on the
emphasis desired. We show only one possible version here, but many are possible.
Be aware that transitional expressions can be overdone; they should be used only
when they improve coherence.

a. We recognize that giving your time to important causes is just as important as
giving your money. Therefore, we’ve created several programs that make it
easy and rewarding for our employees to get involved.

b. Our computerized file includes all customer data. For instance, it provides space
for name, address, and other vital information. Moreover, it has an area for
comments, a feature that comes in handy and helps us keep our records
up-to-date.

c. No one likes to turn out poor products. As a result, we began highlighting
recurring problems. Now, employees make a special effort to be more careful in
doing their work right the first time. Consequently, it doesn’t have to be

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returned to them for corrections.

d. In-depth employment interviews may be structured or unstructured. Structured
interviews have little flexibility. For example, all candidates are asked the same
questions in the same order. As opposed to this, unstructured interviews allow a
free-flowing conversation. However, topics are still prepared for discussion by
the interviewer.

e. Fringe benefits consist of life, health, and dental insurance. Moreover, they
might include paid vacations and sick pay. Further benefits are holidays, funeral
leave, and emergency leave. Finally, they might include paid lunch, rest
periods, tuition reimbursement, and child care.

6.11 Paragraph Organization (Obj. 5)

a. Please authorize additional budget for my department to hire technicians for
night and weekend service hours. Many of our customers struggle with their
business because of problems with their disk drives, printers, and peripherals.
They can’t go without this equipment long enough for the repair. Consequently,
the only time we can service their equipment is in the middle of the night or on
Sunday. Currently, our entire staff of technicians works every Sunday.

b. Retailers have three options for taking delivery of a shipment of Sturdy Bilt
power mowers and chain saws. The cheapest method is for them to pick up
shipments themselves at our nearest distribution centre. These centres are
located in Regina, Winnipeg, and Thunder Bay. A second option involves having
our trucks deliver the shipment from our distribution centre to their door for an
additional fee. The final option brings delivery by air express. Although fast, air
delivery is expensive.

Recommended Answers to Critical Thinking

1. Why is cluster diagramming considered an intuitive process while outlining is
considered an analytical process? (Obj. 1)

Cluster diagramming calls for us to jot down ideas without censoring or evaluating
them. By freely using our imaginations, we allow intuition to take over. Cluster
diagramming is free form, thus promoting a shower of ideas, some usable and many
unusable. Postponing judgment on this flow of ideas acts as a stimulant to our creative
processes.

Outlining is a methodical, analytical process. It involves ordering items into a hierarchy.

2. Why is audience analysis so important in choosing the direct or indirect
pattern of organization for a business message? (Obj. 3)

What can your letter accomplish if your audience refuses to read it? Absolutely nothing!
You will have succeeded only in wasting your time and possibly making a bad situation
worse. If you truly want your reader to read and accept your message, then you must
carefully choose your letter organization pattern.

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3. In what ways do you imagine that writing on the job differs from the writing
you do in your academic studies? Consider process as well as product. (Obj. 1)

Here are some of the ways that writing on the job differs from writing in academic
studies: audience, goals, deadlines, outcomes, feedback, and collaboration.

In school, the audience for an assignment is generally just one individual, the professor.
On the job, the audience may be customers, peers, superiors, or subordinates. Many
messages will have multiple audiences, some of whom are unknown to the sender.
Encourage students to discuss what effect different audiences will have on a person’s
writing. Discuss how the goals of student term papers and other assignments are
different from the goals of letters to customers, memos to colleagues, and reports to
management.

4. Why are short sentences and short paragraphs appropriate for business
communication? (Objs. 4 and 5)

Business readers want to see the main idea immediately. Short sentences and
paragraphs convey ideas quickly and are more readable than longer ones.

Recommended Answers to Chapter Review

1. What are the three main activities involved in the second phase of the 3-x-3
writing process? (Obj. 1)

The three main activities involved in the second phase of the 3-x-3 writing process are
researching, organizing, and composing. (textbook, p. 112)

2. Name seven specific techniques for a productive group brainstorming session.
(Obj. 1)

 Define the problem and create an agenda that outlines the topics to be covered.

 Establish time limits, remembering that short sessions are best.

 Set a quota, such as a minimum of 100 ideas. The goal is quantity, not quality.

 Require every participant to contribute ideas, accept ideas of others, or improve on
ideas.

 Encourage wild, outside-the-box thinking. Allow no one to criticize or evaluate ideas.

 Write ideas on flip charts or on sheets of paper hung around the room.

 Organize and classify the ideas, retaining the best. Consider using cluster diagrams.

(textbook, pp. 113–114)

3. What is a cluster diagram, and when might it be useful? (Obj. 1)

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A cluster diagram is a drawing of all the ideas that pop into a writer’s mind about a
topic. This technique is useful in generating ideas for a long, complex writing task on
which the writer is having trouble getting started. (textbook, p. 115)

4. Describe an alphanumeric outline. (Obj. 2)

An alphanumeric outline combines letters and numbers. Major components are identified
by Roman numerals or capital letters; subpoints, by numbers. (textbook, p. 117)

5. What is the relationship between the major categories in an outline and those
in a report written from the outline? (Obj. 2)

The major categories in an outline become the major headings in a report. (textbook, p.
117)

6. Distinguish between the direct and indirect patterns of organization for typical
business messages. (Obj. 3)

The direct pattern starts with the main idea, followed by details, explanation, and
evidence. The indirect pattern starts with details and explanation and ends with the
main idea. The direct pattern is useful for audiences that you expect to be pleased,
mildly interested, or neutral to your message. The indirect pattern is better for
audiences that you expect to be uninterested, unwilling, displeased, disappointed, or
hostile toward your message. (textbook, pp. 119–121)

7. Why should most messages be “frontloaded”? (Obj. 3)

Starting with the main idea saves the reader time, sets the proper frame of mind, and
prevents reader frustration. (textbook, p. 120)

8. List some business messages that should be frontloaded and some that should
not be frontloaded. (Obj. 3)

Routine requests, routine responses, orders and acknowledgements, favourable claims
and adjustments, procedure and confirmation memos, goodwill messages, and
information reports should be frontloaded. None of these contains a sensitive message
to upset the receiver. (textbook, p. 120)

Bad news messages (request refusals, claim denials, disapproved credit, declined
offers), persuasive requests, and sensitive messages (especially those travelling up the
communication chain to superiors) should not be frontloaded since these may contain
sensitive information that may upset the receiver. (textbook, p. 120)

9. Why should writers plan for revision? How can they do it? (Obj. 4)

Very few writers can create the final version of a message on the first attempt. Nearly
all documents need to be revised. You can plan for revision by working on a word
processor or by double-spacing a handwritten draft. Most important, though, is your
mindset. Recognize that you will be revising and plan time for it. (textbook, p. 122)

10.Name three ways to emphasize important ideas in sentences. (Obj. 4)

Following are three ways to emphasize important ideas in sentences:

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 Put the important idea in a short sentence.
 Make the idea the subject of a sentence.
 Place the idea at the beginning of a sentence.

(textbook, p. 123)

11.Distinguish between active-voice sentences and passive-voice sentences. Give
examples. (Obj. 4)

In active-voice sentences, the subject performs the action. In passive-voice sentences,
the subject receives the action.

Examples:
Active : Kevin wrote the report.
Passive : The report was written by Kevin.

Tip for detecting passive voice: Ask “By whom?” after the verb. If the performer of
the action is revealed, the verb is passive.

(textbook, pp. 123–124)

12.Give an original example of a dangling or misplaced modifier. Why are
introductory verbal phrases dangerous? (Obj. 4)

Example: To enrol in this class, the instructor is encouraging early registration.

Introductory verbal phrases are dangerous because they must be followed by a word
that can logically be modified. Not doing so creates a sentence error. (textbook, pp.
124–125)

13.Describe three kinds of sentences used to develop ideas in paragraphs. (Obj. 5)

The main sentence expresses the primary idea. Supporting sentences illustrate, explain,
or strengthen the primary idea. Limiting sentences express opposing or contrasting
ideas. (textbook, p. 125)

14.Describe three paragraph plans. Identify the uses for each. (Obj. 5)

The most frequently used plan for business messages is the direct plan. It begins with
the main idea followed by supporting sentences. A variation may include one limiting
sentence followed by sentences that support the main idea. The direct plan is useful for
defining, classifying, illustrating, or describing.

The pivoting paragraph begins with a limiting sentence followed by the main and
supporting sentences. This plan is useful for comparing and contrasting.

The indirect plan begins with supporting sentences and concludes with the main
sentence. This plan is useful for building a foundation of ideas and drawing a conclusion
from it or for delaying bad news until after explaining the reasons causing it.

(textbook, pp. 125–127)

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15.What is coherence, and how is it achieved? (Obj. 5)

Coherence exists when one idea leads logically to another; sentences are coherent when
they stick together. To achieve coherence,

 sustain a key idea
 use pronouns and demonstrative adjectives (this, that, these, those)
 dovetail sentences
 use transitional expressions.

(textbook, p. 127)

Quiz 2

Click Quizzes (in the Evaluation block on the course homepage) to go to Quiz 2 (Chapter
6).

Chapter 7: Revise, Proofread, Evaluate

Learning Objectives

After completing this chapter, you will be able to

1. apply Phase 3 of the 3-x-3 writing process, which begins with techniques to make a
message clear and conversational.

2. describe specific revision tactics that make a message concise.

3. describe revision techniques that make a message vigorous and direct.

4. discuss revision strategies that that improve readability.

5. recognize proofreading problem areas and list techniques for proofreading both routine
and complex documents.

6. evaluate a message to judge its success.

Introduction

After studying the first two phases of the 3-x-3 writing process, you know the basics of
planning and writing an effective business document. But there is more to crafting a great
document than getting the first draft on paper.

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In Chapter 7, you will examine the third phase of the 3-x-3 writing process—revising. Here,
you will focus on

 revising the draft to improve clarity, tone, conciseness, vigour, readability, and
directness—creating a more readable document

 proofreading to catch mechanical errors in spelling, grammar, punctuation, and format
to ensure a professional standard in your work

 evaluating your finished document to ensure it effectively conveys the intended
message.

Remember, just because your first draft makes sense to you does not mean it will
automatically be clear to the intended audience. Take the time and effort required by the
steps of revising, proofreading, and evaluating. This will ensure your communications are
polished, professional, and above all, clear to the intended audience.

Readings and Activities

What two habits lead to reading activity

From the print textbook, on pages 136 to 139, read
the following topics:

 Writing Process Phase 3: Revise

 Revising for Conciseness

writing activity

Complete Activities 7.5 and 7.6 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended
Answers to Activities.

Complete Critical Thinking 1 and 2 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended
Answers to Critical Thinking.

reading activity

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dull and lifeless From the print textbook, on pages 139 and 140, read
documents? What the following topic:
changes could make these
documents more vigorous  Revising for Vigour and Directness
and direct?
writing activity

Complete Activity 7.7 from the end-of-chapter
materials in your print textbook and compare your
response with the Recommended Answers to Activities.

What writing techniques reading activity
make a document difficult
to read? How can you From the print textbook, on pages 140 to 144, read
avoid these problems in the following topics:
your own writing? How
can parallel construction  Revising for Readability
and graphical highlighting
make a document more  Checklist for Revising Messages
readable?
writing activity

Complete Activities 7.8 and 7.9 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended
Answers to Activities.

Complete and Critical Thinking 3 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your response with the Recommended
Answers to Critical Thinking.

What common errors reading activity
should you focus on when
proofreading a document? From the print textbook, on pages 144 and 146, read
Would you use the same the following topic:
process to proofread a
short, routine document  Writing Process Phase 3: Proofread
and a long, complex
document? How might writing activity
you alter your approach to
suit the situation? Complete Activity 7.10 from the end-of-chapter
materials in your print textbook and compare your
response with the Recommended Answers to Activities
.

Complete Critical Thinking 4 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your response with the Recommended

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Answers to Critical Thinking.

How do you know if your reading activity
document has been
effective? How can you From the print textbook, on page 146, read the
use each writing following topic:
opportunity as a learning
experience?  Writing Process Phase 3: Evaluate

writing activity

Complete Activities 7.1 and 7.2 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended
Answers to Activities.

optional activity

On the textbook companion Web site, click Crossword
Puzzles in the right-hand menu and complete the
crossword puzzle for Chapter 7.

Work through these review
activities to review and
practise what you have Read the Summary of Learning Objectives at the end
learned in Chapter 7. of the chapter.
These activities will help
you prepare for Complete the Chapter Review from the end-of-chapter
Assignments and Chapter materials in your print textbook and compare your
Quizzes. responses with the Recommended Answers to Chapter
Review.

On the textbook companion Web site, locate Student
Resources on the right-hand side of the page and click
Test Yourself to informally test your understanding
of writing rules and key concepts taught in this
chapter.

Then locate Quiz 3 by clicking Quizzes (in the
Evaluation block on the course homepage) to formally
test your knowledge of these rules and key concepts.
The mark you achieve on this quiz will contribute to
your final grade in the course.

Recommended Answers to Activities

ADMN233v11 Page 33 of 119 June 12/2014

7.1 Document for Analysis: Poorly Written Letter (Objs. 1-5)

Weaknesses

 Uses trite business phrase (as per your request).

 Fails to use conversational language (the undersigned).

 Transforms verbs into nouns (improvement of security instead of improving
security; make a decision instead of decide; make a recommendation
instead of recommend; obtain protection instead of protect).

 Uses wordy phrases (due to the fact that , because of the fact that).

 Suffers from redundancies (first and foremost, last and final) .

 Fails to express conciseness (in all probability instead of probably; areas
that are to be protected instead of protected areas; initiate a verbal
discussion instead of discuss).

 Fails to use familiar words (contemplate instead of think).

Revision

Current date

Mr. Gene Gorsky
702 9th Street
Meadow Lake, SK S9X 1C2

Dear Mr. Gorsky:

At your request, I am sending you the attached materials about improving
security in your business. To improve your after-hours security, you should first
decide what must be protected. You are probably concerned about your
electronic equipment and about company data.

Because we feel you will want to protect both equipment and data, we can
suggest a number of prudent steps to deter crime. First, install defensive
lighting. Our lighting expert can design both outside and inside lighting. Second,
post security signs. Amateur thieves are often deterred by signs on windows and
doors. Finally, install space alarms. These sensors look down over the areas that
are being protected. The sensors can activate bells or lights, thus scaring off
intruders.

After reading the enclosed materials, please call me to further discuss protecting
your business.

Sincerely,

Enclosure

ADMN233v11 Page 34 of 119 June 12/2014

Alternate Revision for 7.1

Current Date

Mr. Gene Gorsky
702 9th Street
Meadow Lake, SK S9X 1C2

Dear Mr. Gorsky:

At your request, I am sending you the attached materials about improving
security in your business. To improve your after-hours security, you should first
decide what must be protected. You are probably concerned about your
electronic equipment and about company data.

Because we feel you will want to protect both equipment and data, we can
suggest the following three steps to deter crime.

1. Install defensive lighting. Our lighting expert can design both outside and
inside lighting.

2. Post security signs. Amateur thieves are often deterred by signs on
windows and doors.

3. Install space alarms. These sensors look down over the areas that are
being protected. The sensors can activate bells or lights, thus scaring off
intruders.

After reading the enclosed materials, please call me to further discuss protecting
your business.

Sincerely,

Enclosure

Note: Enumerated paragraphs may be indented or typed flush left.

7.2 Document for Analysis: Weak E-Mail Message (Objs. 1-5)

Weaknesses

 Suffers from long lead-in (This e-mail is to inform you that) .

 Includes wordy compound prepositions (due to the fact that, in view of the
fact that, at this point in time).

 Uses redundant expressions (important and necessary, free and clear).

 Includes opening filler (There are).

 Lacks parallelism (space, equipment, and how you should schedule

ADMN233v11 Page 35 of 119 June 12/2014

employees).

 Uses wordy noun phrase (making a consideration of instead of considering).

 Fails to use bulleted lists to improve readability.

Revision

TO: Keisha Love, Sales and Marketing Manager <[email protected]>
FROM: Arthur Pentilla, CEO <[email protected]>
DATE: Current
SUBJECT: IMPROVING SAFETY AND SECURITY FOR TELECOMMUTERS

Since telecommuting is becoming increasingly popular, we must be more careful
in planning for information security as well as for our employees’ health and
personal safety.

Because many of our employees may be considering telecommuting, we have
prepared a complete managers’ guide. Structured agreements in the guide
specify space, equipment, and employee schedules. Please discuss the following
home workspace and security recommendations with staff members who may be
considering telecommuting:

Home Workspace Recommendations

 Create a space with minimal traffic and distractions.
 Make it comfortable but provide sufficient space for computer, printer, and

fax.
 Keep it off limits to family and friends.
 Provide proper lighting and telephone service.
 Install smoke detectors.

Information and Personal Security Recommendations

 Remember that a home office is an extension of the company office.
 Be careful to avoid computer viruses and to protect company information.
 Back up important information and store it in a safe, off-site place.
 Do not schedule at-home meetings.
 Use a postal box rather than your home address for mailing.

These are just a few of our recommendations. You will find a complete guide for
telecommuters at our company Web site. Please read it carefully as soon as
possible, and call Human Resources if you have questions.

7.5 Conciseness (Obj. 2)

a. regarding
b. now or quickly
c. if
d. a diligent manager
e. a time-saving program

7.6 Conciseness (Obj. 2)

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a. As you recommend, we will not try to alter the proposal now.
b. Clearly, monthly meetings are most effective.
c. We will decide soon whether to use the press release you sent.
d. Numerous benefits result from a good customer service program.
e. I now wish to thank all the support staff who helped make this occasion

possible.

7.7 Vigour (Obj. 3)

a. Please consider our latest proposal, even though it conflicts with the original
plan.

b. We assessed $500 in damages, causing us to reduce the claim amount.
c. After we prepare a report, we’ll present our final recommendations to the

Executive Committee.
d. Three staff members are trying to locate your lost order.
e. Whether we continue the sales campaign depends on its success in Calgary.

7.8 Parallelism (Obj. 2)

a. Ensuring equal opportunities, removing barriers, and eliminating age
discrimination are our objectives.

b. The market for industrial goods includes manufacturers, contractors,
wholesalers, and retailers.

c. Last year Amanda Thomas wrote letters and gave presentations to promote
investment in her business.

d. For this position we assess oral and written communication skills,
problem-solving skills, teamwork skills, and interpersonal skills including
cultural awareness and sensitivity.

e. We have three objectives: increase the frequency of product use, introduce
complementary products, and enhance our corporate image.

7.9 Lists, Bullets, and Headings (Obj. 4)

a. HR Plus specializes in the following pre-employment background reports:

 Professional reference interviews
 Criminal reports
 Driving records
 Employment verification
 Credit reports

b. In writing to customers granting loan approval, follow these steps:

1. Announce approval of the loan.
2. Specify the loan’s terms and limits.
3. Discuss the importance of timely payments.
4. Provide a phone number for assistance.

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c. Our lawyer recommends the following to avoid sexual harassment litigation:

 Written policy. Establish an unequivocal (or clear) written policy
prohibiting sexual harassment within our organization.

 Training. Provide training sessions for supervisors regarding a proper
work environment.

 Complaint procedure. Arrange an official procedure to hear complaints
and investigate.

7.10 Proofreading (Obj. 5)

a. English may be the international language of commerce, but that does not
mean that every reader will have a trouble-free experience with messages
written in English.

b. Be especially careful with dates. For example, a message that reads, “Our
video conference begins at 6 p.m. on 7/10/10,” would mean July 10, 2010, to
North Americans.

c. To Europeans, the time and date would be written as follows: “The video
conference will begin at 18:00 on 10 July 2010.”

d. Because Europeans use a 24-hour military clock, be sure to write
international messages in that format.

e. To avoid confusion, give metric measurements followed by their American
equivalents (e.g., “The office is 10 kilometres (6.2 miles) from the train
station.”).

Recommended Answers to Critical Thinking

1. Why is it difficult to recommend a specific process that all writers can follow in
composition? (Obj. 1)

Although general steps in a process are helpful to novices, a rigid plan is impossible for
everyone to follow. Just as people have very different personalities, they also have very
different modes of learning, working, and writing. Moreover, not all tasks are equal. A
routine e-mail differs immensely from an analytical report. Although the general steps
(analyzing, anticipating, adapting, research, organization, and so on) are similar, the
time required, the thoroughness, and specific operations within the process vary
considerably.

2. Would you agree or disagree with the following statement by writing expert
William Zinsser? “Plain talk will not be easily achieved in corporate North
America. Too much vanity is on the line.” (Objs. 1 and 2)

It is unfortunate that few executives have taken specialty writing courses such as
business communications. Some of them believe they are much more impressive when
they use big words, long sentences, and convoluted reasoning. Because their egos

ADMN233v11 Page 38 of 119 June 12/2014

affect their oral and written communication, even simple ideas sound difficult. Zinsser
says, “Executives at every level are prisoners of the notion that a simple style reflects a
simple mind. Actually a simple style is the result of hard work and hard thinking; a
muddy style reflects a muddy thinker or a person too lazy to organize his or her
thoughts” (from William Zinsser's On Writing Well, 7th edition, published in 2006 by
HarperCollins).

3. Since business writing should have high “skim value,” why not write
everything in bulleted lists? (Objs. 2 and 4)

Although listing items in bulleted or enumerated lists does improve readability,
excessive use of such lists prevents the achievement of other business writing goals.
Business writing must be purposeful, goal oriented, and conversational. Achieving a
friendly, conversational tone is difficult or impossible in a bulleted list. It’s also difficult
to be persuasive or to convey a “you” attitude in lists. Bulleted lists are valuable to
improve “skim” value, but they are appropriate only when used occasionally in
presenting related ideas. Used excessively, they begin to look like laundry lists and turn
off readers.

4. Why should the proofreading process for routine documents differ from that
for complex documents? (Objs. 4 and 5)

Complex documents should be set aside for a breather before they are proofread
because they are usually longer. Since they are longer, errors involving numbers, facts,
and other data are a distinct possibility. Be sure to allow adequate time for the
proofreading, reduce reading speed, and read the document at least three times—for
word meaning, for grammar/mechanics, and for formatting.

Recommended Answers to Chapter Review

1. Approximately how much of the total composition time should be spent
revising, proofreading, and evaluating? (Obj. 1)

Experts recommend spending half of the total project time revising, proofreading, and
evaluating. (textbook, p. 136)

2. What is the KISS method? In what three ways can it apply to business writing?
(Obj. 1)

"Keep it Short and Simple" (although some people prefer “Keep it Simple, Stupid”). To
apply this adage, (1) write simply, (2) use active-voice sentences, and (3) avoid
negative, indirect, and pompous language. (textbook, p. 137)

3. What is a redundancy? Give an example. Why should writers avoid
redundancies? (Obj. 2)

A redundancy is an expression that repeats its meaning, such as continue on, reason
why, or true facts . Writers should avoid redundancies because they are wordy.
(textbook, p. 138)

4. Why should communicators avoid openings such as there is ? (Obj. 2)

ADMN233v11 Page 39 of 119 June 12/2014

Fillers such as there is and it is are wordy and add no meaning to sentences. Usually
sentences can be rewritten to achieve more direct openings. (textbook, p. 138)

5. What shorter forms could be substituted for the expressions at this point in
time , for the amount of , and in advance of ? (Obj. 2)

at this point in time now

for the amount of for

in advance of before

(textbook, p. 139)

6. Why should a writer avoid the opening, "I am sending this e-mail because we
have just hired a new manager, and I would like to introduce her"? (Obj. 2)

The opening phrase "I am sending this e-mail because..." says the obvious. It is a long
lead-in and needlessly delays getting to the real message. Omit it. (textbook, p. 139)

7. Why should a writer avoid an expression such as "We expect the executive
committee to give authorization to the merger"? (Obj. 3)

It uses a noun (authorization ) instead of the more forceful verb form (authorize ). Avoid
converting verbs into nouns. (textbook, p. 140)

8. What’s wrong with businesslike expressions such as enclosed please find and
as per your request ? (Obj. 3)

They are trite, old-fashioned, and wordy. Writing is more vigorous when such
expressions are revised. (textbook, p. 140)

9. What is parallelism, and how can you achieve it? (Obj. 4)

When similar ideas are expressed in similar grammatical constructions, they are parallel.
To achieve it, balance nouns with nouns, verbs with verbs, and so forth. (textbook, pp.
140–141)

10.What is high “skim value,” and how can you achieve it? (Obj. 4)

This expression refers to how quickly readers can browse a message and comprehend
its meaning. The following techniques promote high skim value:

 bulleted items
 numbered items
 lettered items
 headings
 bolding, italics, underlining
 capital letters

(textbook, p. 141)

11.What factors determine whether you should use bulleted or numbered items in
a list? (Obj. 4)

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Use numbered lists for items that represent a sequence or for reference. Use bullets to
highlight items that don’t necessarily show a chronology. (textbook, p. 141)

12.Name five specific items to check in proofreading. Be ready to discuss methods
you find useful in spotting these errors. (Obj. 5)

When proofreading, check the following for possible errors:

 spelling
 grammar
 names and numbers
 punctuation
 format

(textbook, p. 144)

13.In proofreading, what major psychological problem do you face in finding
errors? How can you overcome this barrier? (Obj. 5)

Psychologically, we don’t want to find our own errors. To overcome this obstacle,
develop a mindset of expecting to find errors. Congratulate yourself when you do!
(textbook, p. 144)

14.List four or more techniques for proofreading complex documents. (Obj. 5)

Following are techniques for proofreading complex documents:

 Set aside the document for a day.
 Proofread a printed, double-spaced copy.
 Allow adequate time to proofread.
 Be prepared to find errors.
 Read the message twice—once for word meanings, once for grammar/mechanics.
 Reduce your reading speed.
 Have one person read to another.
 Use standard proofreading marks to indicate changes.

(textbook, pp. 145–146)

15.How can you overcome defensiveness when your writing is criticized
constructively? (Obj. 6)

It’s natural to be defensive. But try to consider this criticism valuable advice. Look upon
this training as skill development. Writers, like athletes, need pointers that speed
improvement. (textbook, p. 146)

Quiz 3

Click Quizzes (in the Evaluation block on the course homepage) to go to Quiz 3 (Chapter
7).

ADMN 233v11

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ADMN 233v11
Writing in Organizations

Section 2 Business Correspondence

Chapter 8: Routine E-Mail Messages and Memos

Learning Objectives

After completing this chapter, you will be able to

1. discuss how the 3-x-3 writing process helps you produce effective e-mail messages and
memos.

2. analyze the structure and formatting of e-mail messages and memos.
3. describe smart e-mail practices, including getting started; content, tone, and

correctness; netiquette; replying to e-mail; and formatting.
4. write information and procedure e-mail messages and memos.
5. write request and reply e-mail messages and memos.
6. write confirmation e-mail messages and memos.

Introduction

So far in this course, you have studied the phases of the 3-x-3 writing process, and you
have seen how these principles may be applied to produce effective business documents.
Now it is time to go further by exploring specific types of business documents to learn how
the 3-x-3 writing process can apply to each.

In Chapter 8, you will learn about two short but very important forms of business
communication: routine e-mail messages and memos. You will examine the purpose and
basic structure for routine e-mail and memos, as well as smart practices for safely using
e-mail within an organization. In addition, you will examine the three main forms these
messages take:

 procedure and information e-mail messages and memos, usually written by managers
for employees to direct the operation of an organization

ADMN233v11 Page 42 of 119 June 12/2014

 request and reply e-mail messages and memos, written to seek and provide information
for specific needs

 confirmation e-mail messages and memos, used mainly to create a permanent record of
oral agreements or decisions

By applying effective techniques for writing routine e-mail messages and memos, you will
increase the chances that these documents will achieve their goals, while at the same time
enhancing your own image within your organization.

Readings and Activities

How are e-mail messages reading activity
and memos the same?
How are they different? From the print textbook, on pages 156 and 157, read the
following topic:

 Applying the Writing Process to Produce Effective E–
Mail Messages and Memos

writing activity

Complete Critical Thinking 2 from the end-of-chapter
materials in your print textbook and compare your
response with the Recommended Answers to Critical
Thinking.

What four parts do most reading activity
routine e-mail messages
and memos contain? From the print textbook, on pages 158 to 163, read the
following topic:

 Analyzing the Structure and Format of E-Mail
Messages and Memos

writing activity

Complete Activities 8.4 and 8.5 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended Answers
to Activities.

What are smart e-mail reading activity
practices? How can these
practices help you become From the print textbook, on pages 164 to 168, read the
a more effective following topic:
communicator and avoid

ADMN233v11 Page 43 of 119 June 12/2014

potential workplace  Using E-mail Smartly and Safely
trouble?
writing activity
What are the unique
features of and Complete Activity 8.16 from the end-of-chapter
techniques for writing materials in your print textbook and compare your
procedure and response with the Recommended Answers to Activities.
information e-mail
messages and memos? Complete Critical Thinking 1, 3, and 4 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
What are the unique compare your responses with the Recommended Answers
features of and to Critical Thinking.
techniques for writing
request and reply e-mail reading activity
messages and memos?
From the print textbook, on pages 168 to 170, read the
following topic:

 Writing Information and Procedure E-Mail Messages
and Memos

writing activity

Complete Activity 8.7 from the end-of-chapter materials
in your print textbook and compare your response with
the Recommended Answers to Activities.

reading activity

From the print textbook, on pages 170 to 173, read the
following topics:

 Writing Request and Reply E-Mail Messages and
Memos

 Writing Confirmation E-Mail Messages and Memos

writing activity

Complete Activity 8.15 from the end-of-chapter
materials in your print textbook and compare your
response with the Recommended Answers to Activities.

reading activity

From the print textbook, on pages 173 and 174, read the
following topic:

 Checklist for Writing Routine E-Mail Messages and
Memos

ADMN233v11 Page 44 of 119 June 12/2014

writing activity

Complete Activities 8.1, 8.2, and 8.3 from the
end-of-chapter materials in your print textbook and
compare your responses with the Recommended Answers
to Activities.

optional activity

On the textbook companion Web site, click Crossword
Puzzles in the right-hand menu and complete the
crossword puzzle for Chapter 8.

Work through these review
activities to review and
practise what you have Read the Summary of Learning Objectives at the end of
learned in Chapter 8. the chapter.
These activities will help
you prepare for Complete the Chapter Review from the end-of-chapter
Assignments and Chapter materials in your print textbook and compare your
Quizzes. responses with the Recommended Answers to Chapter
Review.

On the textbook companion Web site, locate Student
Resources on the right-hand side of the page and click
Test Yourself to informally test your understanding of
writing rules and key concepts taught in this chapter.

Then locate Quiz 4 by clicking Quizzes (in the Evaluation
block on the course homepage) to formally test your
knowledge of these rules and key concepts. The mark you
achieve on this quiz will contribute to your final grade in
the course.

Recommended Answers to Activities

8.1 Document for Analysis: Information E-Mail (Objs. 1–4)
Weaknesses:
 Fails to summarize message in a functional subject line.
 Does not immediately reveal the purpose of the message in the opening.
 Suffers from acute wordiness and stream-of-consciousness expression.

ADMN233v11 Page 45 of 119 June 12/2014

 Shows no sign of thoughtful organization.

 Fails to use headings or listing techniques for three recommendations.

 Introduces unrelated topic (Workplace Issues conference in January).

 Ends with cliché and confusion instead of clear statement regarding what is
to be done.

 Makes it difficult to find the end date.

Revision:

To: Ceresa Rothery <[email protected]>
From: Paul Rouse <[email protected]>
Date: Current
Subject: Suggestions for Preventing Workplace Violence

Ceresa:

As you requested, I am submitting the following report with suggestions for
preventing workplace violence in our organization. These ideas resulted from the
November 3 Workplace Issues conference that I attended as our company
representative. Susan Sloan, the presenter, provided many excellent ideas,
which I will summarize in three categories.

PRESCREEN JOB APPLICANTS. Wise companies, said Ms. Sloan, do not offer
employment until a candidate’s background has been checked. Just the mention
of a check often makes a candidate with something to hide withdraw.

RECOGNIZE RED-FLAG BEHAVIOUR. Companies should train managers to
recognize signs of possible workplace violence. Some of these include a rise in
petty arguments with coworkers, extreme changes in behaviour, statements
indicating depression over family or financial problems, bullying or harassing
behaviour, and bringing a firearm to work or exhibiting an extreme fascination
with firearms.

DEVELOP REPORTING PROCEDURES. Companies should prepare a good
employee handbook that outlines what employees should do when they suspect
potential workplace violence. Include a system for anonymous notification.

The recommendation that I think is most feasible is prescreening of job
candidates. Please let me know by November 18 whether you want me to do
more research on prescreening techniques and present a full conference report at
our December 3 management meeting.

Paul

8.2 Document for Analysis: Request Memo (Objs. 1–5)

Weaknesses:

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 Fails to open with the main idea (asking employees which plan they prefer).

 Confuses the reader with unnecessary information.

 Emphasizes the writer’s view rather than the reader’s.

 Forgets to make it easy for the reader to respond.

 Does not provide an end date.

Revision:

DATE: Current
TO: All Employees
FROM: Kim Albano, Human Resources
SUBJECT Floating Holiday Options
:

Would you prefer (a) an individual floating holiday or (b) a company-wide
uniform floating holiday?

Because we’re genuinely interested in developing a holiday plan that pleases as
many people as possible, we’d like your response below.

In the past we’ve allowed 11 holidays plus 1 floating holiday, agreed on by
company-wide ballot. Now, though, we’d like to offer you the possibility of an
individual floating holiday. You would be able to choose the date you wish to
take, subject to staffing needs within your departments. If several requests are
made for the same date, employment seniority would govern.

Please check the plan of your choice:

___ I prefer to retain the current policy of a uniform floating holiday.

___ I prefer an individual floating holiday, subject to the provisions described
above.

To have your choice counted, return this form to Human Resources by January
25.

8.3 Document for Analysis: Confirmation E-Mail (Objs. 1–6)

Weaknesses:

 Does not have a descriptive, functional subject line.

 Fails to open directly with a statement that this message confirms the
previous day’s telephone conversation.

 Does not itemize the main points in the body to make them easy to read.

 Employs wordy expressions and stream-of-consciousness writing.

ADMN233v11 Page 47 of 119 June 12/2014

 Does not close with an action request.

Revision:

To: David Ricci <[email protected]>
From: Jillian Ann Brody <[email protected]>
Date: Current
Subject: Confirming Our Conversation Regarding Commercials for Radio

Bermuda

Dear Mr. Ricci:

This message confirms our telephone conversation of Tuesday, December 2, in
which we discussed the advertising campaign to rejuvenate the slumping tourist
industry in Bermuda. Here are some of the specific points on which we agreed:

 You want me to write a total of 240 one-minute radio commercials to be
broadcast from March 30 through June 30.

 These commercials will be played on three radio stations in five major cities
on the East Coast during morning and evening drive time.

 The commercials will present as much of the colour, character, attractions,
and civility of Bermuda as possible in one-minute broadcasts.

 The scripts will remind listeners that the island is less than three hours away.
I will work in references to tree frogs, royal palm trees, and such local
delicacies as shark on toast, conch fritters, and mussel stew.

If you agree that these points accurately reflect our conversation, Mr. Ricci,
please confirm this in a reply message. I am eager to work with you in
developing a very successful Radio Bermuda campaign.

Jillian Ann Brody

8.4 Openers for E-Mail Messages and Memos (Objs. 1–3)

a. Please send me a copy of your organization’s written Internet policy, which
you mentioned at our last committee meeting.

b. At your request, here are six suggestions for school boards to consider in
regard to current and future sale of soft drinks in school vending machines.

c. Yes, you can attend the Web Site Design Seminar sponsored by Presentation
Planners on February 25 and 26.

d. Because of complaints made by document specialists regarding the inability
to adjust chair height, new chairs have been ordered and they should arrive
in three weeks.

8.5 Subject Lines (Objs. 1–3)

a. REQUESTING COPY OF YOUR ORGANIZATION’S INTERNET POLICY

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b. SENDING SUGGESTED GUIDELINES FOR SOFT DRINK VENDING MACHINES
c. PERMISSION GRANTED TO ATTEND WEB SITE DESIGN SEMINAR
d. NEW CHAIRS WITH ADJUSTABLE BACKS ORDERED

8.7 Information E-Mail or Memo: Driving Less and Breathing Easier (Obj. 4)

Sample Memo

DATE: Current
TO: All Employees
FROM: Your name
SUBJECT TRIP REDUCTION PLAN INCENTIVES
:

To comply with the Air Quality Management District’s Trip Reduction Plan, Mercer
Enterprises offers the following incentives as a means of encouraging employees
to leave their cars at home:

 Full Day Off With Pay. Employees who maintain a 75 percent participation
rate in our ride-share program for a six-month period, beginning May 1, will
receive one day off with pay.

 Preferential Parking. Employees coming to work in van pools get to park
close to the building in reserved spaces. A parking pass is required.

 Bus Pass Subsidy. Employees who use public transportation will receive a
monthly $25 subsidy. A free round-trip transit pass will also be provided by
Mercer Enterprises to employees for the first month they use public
transportation.

 Van Pool Subsidy. Mercer Enterprises will assist in obtaining a van and will
provide a monthly $150 subsidy. In addition, the van pool driver will have
unlimited personal use of the vehicle off company time.

 Bicycle Subsidy. Employees who bicycle to work will receive a monthly
subsidy of $25, and bicycle racks, locks, and chains will be provided.

We’re trying our best to get you to leave your cars at home. For more
information about the program or to sign up for any of the incentives, please
contact Jennifer O’Toole ([email protected]) before June 1.

8.15 Confirmation Memo or E-Mail: Did I Hear This Correctly? (Obj. 6)

DATE: Current
TO: Jayne Moneysmith
FROM: Your Name
SUBJECT Confirming Your Remarks About E-Mail Harassment
:

I enjoyed our luncheon on Thursday, March 19. Among other things, Jayne, we
discussed e-mail harassment. Because I would like to share your comments at
our next management council meeting, I want to be sure that I heard you
correctly. Are the following statements accurate?

ADMN233v11 Page 49 of 119 June 12/2014

 E-mail messages can constitute actionable sexual harassment if they are
severe and adversely affect the receiver’s work environment.

 Even deleted e-mails leave a “meta data” trail revealing attachments, dates
and times of edits and transmissions, file size, conversation threads, and
document file paths.

 “At will” employees can be legally terminated if they circulate inappropriate
and/or pornographic materials on company computers.

These are important points that I want to be sure I have understood correctly. If
I have represented your remarks accurately, please reply briefly before March 25
so that I have an official record of our conversation.

8.16 What to Do About the Junk E-Mail Epidemic? (Obj. 3)

Here are some ideas:

 Legislation. In some cases, existing legislation may be applicable.
Information on how provisions in the Personal Information Protection and
Electronic Documents Act (PIPEDA), The Competition Act, and the Criminal
Code of Canada can be used to combat spam can be found in “Stopping
Spam: Creating a Stronger, Safer Internet” (May 2005), available through
Industry Canada.

 Public education. With more awareness that spam has the potential to
cripple or at least seriously hamper this important communication system,
perhaps the public would put pressure on legislators, the communication
industry, and the big software companies to do something to get this
epidemic under control. The Canadian Anti-Fraud Call Centre (
http://www.phonebusters.ca) offers tips to combat spam, spyware, and
phishing (see below).

 Industry actions by Internet service providers. According to information
at www.antiphishing.org, “Phishing attacks use ‘spoofed’ e-mails and
fraudulent Web sites designed to fool recipients into divulging personal
financial data such as credit card numbers, account usernames and
passwords, social insurance numbers, etc. By hijacking the trusted brands of
well-known banks, online retailers and credit card companies, phishers are
able to convince up to 5% of recipients to respond to them.” An eWeek article
says, “The main way spam, viruses and phishing attacks succeed is by
spoofing senders’ addresses in e-mail messages. A recent study by the
Anti-Phishing Working Group (www.antiphishing.org) found that 95 percent
of all spam and e-mail fraud is propagated through forged e-mail addresses.

 Software solutions. Examples can be found by keying in the search phrase
“anti-spam software” at Google (http://www.google.ca).

Recommended Answers to Critical Thinking

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