Liza [rising, terrified] Sixty pounds! What off as anything. We'll start to-day: now! this because we are now recognizing that some of
are you talking about? I never offered you moment! Take her away and clean her, Mrs the revolting attitudes towards sex and towards
sixty pounds. Where would I get— Pearce. women which became popular . . . have
become popular over the last couple of decades
Higgins Hold your tongue. Tapescript13c have had a number of seriously sad side
Liza [weeping] But I aint got sixty pounds. effects, not least the tragedy of AIDS and so
Pygmalion: Extract 4 on. So I personally am offended by that, but I
Oh— would say that the association is probably
Mrs Pearce Dont cry, you silly girl. Sit See pages 68-9. slightly more concerned, particularly about
violence, - violent language, violent activity,
down. Nobody is going to touch your Tapescript14
and the idea that sloshing out at somebody,
money. A monologue engaging in really savage, barbaric er . . . er. . .
Higgins Somebody is going to touch you, Quite honestly, I don't know how you've put up activity is a normal even a praiseworthy,
with it for all these years. Personally, I would have heroic, manly thing to do. I'm thinking, for in-
with a broomstick, if you dont stop left after a few weeks. After all, it's not as though it stance, of films like Sebastiane, and Jubilee,
snivelling. Sit down. was your fault, 1 mean to say, he was the one that that disgusting film where policemen were
Liza [obeying slowly] Ah-ah-ah-ow-oo-o! was so keen on it in the first place. Actually, he had seen erm . . . being the victims of cannibalism
One would think you was my father. to work really hard to persuade you, if I remember and somebody was roasted alive on a spit. . .
Higgins If I decide to teach you, I'll be rightly. Frankly, I think you should remind him of
worse than two fathers to you. Here! [he that a bit more often. You are still speaking to each ugh . . .
other presumably? I wouldn't blame you if you I Was this shown on television?
offers her his silk handkerchief} weren't! Seriously though, enough is enough. JB Er . . . Yes this was shown on Channel 4.1
Liza Whats this for? Admittedly he wasn't to know, but he should have
Higgins To wipe your eyes. To wipe any part made it his job to find out! After all, he always regard that as unacceptable . . . grossly violent,
prides himself on his thoroughness! Ideally, he sadistic er . . . with the most horrible and
of your face that feels moist. Remember: should have had it surveyed properly. Of course it depraved of overtones. I think there's a case for
thats your handkerchief; and thats your costs a bit, but it's always worth it. Obviously he saying that some things don't really have a
sleeve. Dont mistakethe one for the other if trusted his own judgement. Well, all I can say is it place on the small screen at all. and belong to
you wish to become a lady in a shop. certainly let him down badly this time! Let's hope the private cinema club for those who really
Liza, utterly bewildered, stares helplessly at he's learnt a lesson from it ! Next time - and I hope like that kind of thing.
him. it's soon for your sake - maybe he'll listen to you. I But don't people realize the difference betweea
Mrs Pearce It's no use talking to her like Surely he will? Incidentally, do you know the fantasy and reality?
that, Mr Higgins: she doesnt understand Tumerg'afe thinking of moving to the same estate? JB Ah . . . I don't actually think people do know
you. Besides, youre quite wrong: she doesnt As a matter of fact, Jane was telling me they've the difference between fantasy and reality, not
do it that way at all [she takes the already viewed a couple of properties. In all fairness that that always matters it can even be quite
handkerchief]. we'll just have to warn them. Perhaps you should amusing. On BBC radio, the programme The
Liza [snatching ;'t] Here! You give me that get Jack to tell them! Archers, the popular everyday tale of farming
handkerchief. He give it to me, not to you. folk, they wanted to write a new bab> into the
Pickering [laughing] He did. I think it must Tapescript15 story at one point. . . they'd had a young
be regarded as her property, Mrs Pearce. couple getting married and er. . ., a couple of
Mrs Pearce [resigning herself] Serve you Dialogues for completion years later they thought 'time to introduce a
right, Mr Higgins. See page 72. baby into the script' and they decided against it
Pickering Higgins: I'm interested. What because they didn't have the staff at the BBC at
about the ambassador's garden party? I'll UNIT 7 the time to cope with the flood of little white
say youre the greatest teacher alive if you knitted woolly things that would be arriving for
make that good. I'll bet you all the expenses Tapescript16a
of the experiment you cant do it. And I'll this non-existent baby! They had to wait until
pay for the lessons. Interview with Joanna Bogle, they'd got the secretaries and so on to cope
of the National Viewers' and with it! So people do believe in it. It's
Liza Oh, you are real good. Thank you, Listeners' Association ridiculous, people write to Coronation Street
Captain. I = Interviewer for the imagined wedding anniversaries and
JB = Joanna Bogle birthdays and funerals and so on that crop up.
Higgins [tempted, looking at her] It's almost I Joanna Bogle is a member of the National Fantasy is ... is . . . very difficult to remove
irresistible. She's so deliciously low - so from reality.
horribly dirty — Viewers' and Listeners' Association, which I What evidence is there that, um, the violence
aims to monitor the output of both television or indeed sexual behaviour that is seen on
Liza [protesting extremely} Ah-ah-ah-ah-ow- and radio. Joanna believes quite firmly that TV television is reflected in behaviour . . . I mean
ow-oo-oo!!! I aint dirty: I washed my face stations should recognize more fully the power isn't it the other way round?
and hands afore I come, I did. and influence of television, and exercise JB This of course is the big debate and it is true
stricter control over programme content. I that television both reflects and influences. I
Pickering Youre certainly not going to turn asked her what kind of thing she personally think we've all had the experience of being
her head with flattery, Higgins. found offensive on television. enormously inspired by magnificent music or a
JB Well . . . this would be difficult to say. First I stirring speech or a call to courage. We've all
Mrs Pearce [uneasy] Oh, dont say that, sir: don't think one wants to say so much been moved by some impressive event on
theres more ways than one of turning a personally as what our association would find television and certainly we can even see
girl's head; and nobody can do it better than offensive and it's not only offensive but harm- within a whole country that you can create a
Mr Higgins, though he may not always ful. I do think that I personally find a great deal mood or a climate by the way in which you
mean it. I do hope, sir, you wont encourage of the exploitation of sex and sexuality present an . . . an activity, and I think that it's
him to do anything foolish. offensive. Perhaps this is particularly as a rather silly to imagine that people who are
woman. And I find it very irresponsible too uplifted by er . . . a lovely piece of pageantry or
Higgins [becoming excited as the idea grows by stirring music are not depraved by
on him] What is life but a series of inspired something that's disgusting. Clearly we're
follies? The difficulty is to find them to do. both. It is true tha . . . that the mixture between
Never lose a chance: it doesnt come every what influences you and wha . . . and how you
day. I shall make a duchess of this draggle- influence the screen is . . . is a blurred area and
tailed guttersnipe. everybody in the mass media knows this, but I
would say that by and large one of the major
Liza [strongly deprecating this view of her} influences on all our lives is television, and
Ah-ah-ah-ow-ow-oo! people wouldn't spend thousands of pounds on
advertising on it if it didn't influence people -
Higgins [carried away} Yes: in six months -
in three if she has a good ear and a quick
tongue - I'll take her anywhere and pass her
151
'Persil washes whiter' says the voice over and I So you're saying that there are certain people UNITS
over again and millions of housewives are who may be influenced?
absolutely convinced that it does and they go Tapescript19
out and buy the product. So 1 think the KA Of course there are.
influence is mostly that way round. I But they (unclear) . . . majority. little Red Riding Hood and the
KA There are . . . they . . . of course there are Wolf by Roald Dahl
Tapescript16b • • See page 86.
people who are influenced by anything.
Interview with Kate Adie, I In the course of your work you deal with issues Tapescript20 , .'"'•
a BBC journalist that contain real violence. There's also a lot of Sounds
fictional violence on television. Do you feel
I = Interviewer that viewers can understand the difference 1 A lion roaring
KA = Kate Adie between fantasy and reality? 2 A door creaking
KA Most can. First of all I think it's up to the 3 A church bell chiming
I What evidence is there that, er, television television erm . . . companies, for a start, to 4 Fingers tapping on a table
influences behaviour? bear some responsibility for saying 'This is 5 Someone crunching an apple
fictional; this is a fantasy', and to say 'This is 6 A car horn blaring
KA There is quite a lot of evidence that it reality'. I think television companies have a 7 Someone gasping in amazement
influences behaviour in a manner of life- responsibility on one side, on the other side I 8 A boot squelching in mud
styles, images, popularity of fashion. Whether think that most viewers do distinguish. Some 9 A stone plopping into water
it's a deep influence on behaviour is question- don't. There are hordes of people, you know, in 10 The click of a camera
able, because it could be seen as both a force this country, who . . . are . . . are deeply in 11 A door banging
for good and a force for evil, and many of the search of Coronation Street in Lancashire. 12 Someone groaning in pain
grey areas in between, and it's certainly not They actually . . . you know . . . people go and 13 A wolf howling
one nor the other, because television, for try to find the Archers. They want to know 14 A fire crackling
example, has endless images of heroism, of where Ambridge is. They spend their lives 15 Someone shrieking in terror
good, of . . . of grandeur, of charity, of loving, crawling round Yorkshire looking for Emmer- 16 A squeaky toy
which . . . and we have a world which dale Farm. All of these fictional places. 17 A sandbag thumping onto the floor
certainly doesn't emulate that one hundred per I What do you personally find offensive on
cent of the time. Also television has images of television? Tapescript 21
violence, of unpleasantness, of evil,of cruelty, KA I find gratuitous violence extremely offensive.
and . . . again you find that in society, but not I don't like violence. I don't like it in real life. I Interview with Barbara Cartland
one hundred per cent. I'd almost reverse the am actually physically sickened when I see
remark and say that I think that television is a people fighting. I do not like it. Erm . . . I . . . I I = Interviewer
reflection of the society in which you live, as also find horror where there is a sort of . . . BC = Barbara Cartland
long as that television is free to be that where the human body is chopped up,
reflection. ^fluashed, generally exploded and extruded. I I Your first novel was published in 1923, and
find this appalling. I don't like it myself. I since then you've written over four hundred
I When you say 'free to be that reflection', in would not stop other people watching it. and fifty books. In fact, you hold various world
what ways is it constrained from doing that? records. Can you tellme a bit about that first?
Tapescript17
KA ! suppose we take the view in this country, BC Yes. At the moment I hold the world record for
where television has . . . on the whole been run A poem on English pronunciation the amount of books I've sold, which we say is
by people of a certain amount of education, and forty-five million, but we don't really know,
a certain social background for many years, Seepages 80-1. because when I went to I . . .Indonesia the
that television has, on the whole, been what a other day, the children kept coming up for
certain group of people think other people Tapescript18 autographs, and I said 'What's all this? I don't
ought to have. It certainly hasn't been a publish in Indonesia!' What a surprise! I found
straightforward television being people . . . The meeting they'd plagiarised every book, including the
what people would like to have. Television last two from America, and every publisher
being what people would like to have, in other B = Alice Barren printed them! So er . . . my son spoke to the
words, a lowest common denominator . . . er D = James Dunlop ambassador and he said he could do nothing
attitude to television, would for example, er, limply, so I'm . . . I'm in Indonesian, I'm in ...
introduce a great deal of pornography onto B Well, James, the best I can do for a pay rise this I found a book of . . . mine written in Thai,
television. You would also have a much larger year is five per cent. Sorry. You see, it can't be which they hadn't paid on, and all these
percentage of . . . low-challenging pro- more because, well . . . quite simply, profits have Indians always plagiarise everything. So I
grammes. By that I mean pap, really non-chal- been lower than expected. mean I've no idea how much 1 really sell, it's
lenging, unintelligent, soap opera, quiz pro- absolutely extraordinary! And it's very
gramme . . . D Five per cent! But at the beginning of the year interesting because, as you know, I'm very
you said it would be at least eight per cent! Do pure, and my heroine is never allowed to go to
I You recently made a television documentary you realize that the rate of inflation this year is bed until she has the ring on her fingers, and
on the subject of violence on television. To running at ten per cent? Most of the work-force erm . . . I sell more than anybody else. And
what extent did this change your views? can hardly afford to pay their bills. what I've done is also . . . that is the amount of
books I've sold, according to the Guinness
KA I'm going to sound a very obstinate, ignorant B James, I know very well that the situation is Book of Records I'm the best-selling author in
hippopotamus and say . . . you know, not a difficult. I'm not having a rise at all. I'm really the world . . . and I've also done the record
great deal, because I work most of the time in sorry it can't be more this time round. But the number of books every year. For the last eleven
this area. I work . . . I spend a lot of my time company must have capital for research and years I've done an average of twenty-three, and
seeing with my own eyes the sort of subject development. Without that, there'd be no future. nobody's argued (laughs). They ke . . . they
which is extremely difficult to put on The company would have to close. keep saying, 'You know, you've done more
television, which I was making the programme than anybody else.' So I presume there it is.
about, about violence. I see quite a bit of death D I don't believe that ! We've got orders for the And now at the moment I'm just starting on
and cruelty and . . . of unkindness and violence next twelve months. You're just trying to keep Monday, I shall be starting my er . . . eight-
and brutality. All of these things. And I have to the pay rise as low as possible. Well, there'll be eenth this year, so I shall have broken the
make regular judgements about what I feel can trouble, you see. You could have a strike on your world record again.
be shown on television, and I by no means hands.
have ever believed that everything can be
shown. I see no evidence, I hear no evidence of B That really would be a terrible thing to happen.
real harm done to people by the mere showing Look, why don't you explain the situation to the
of violent acts on television, with the rider that, staff, and then come back to me?
of course, there are always people who will be
watching who are uniquely susceptible. D All right, but only if you say you're prepared to
negotiate a settlement and not just impose a
figure.
B Well, all right, I'll see what I can do.
152
I Amazing! How do you set about organizing 2 Well. I live in a very large city. It's a port, and it's very wet. It's er. . . usually associated with being
your writing day? I mean, to write so much you on the River Mersey. It's very close to Wales, and very wet up there.
must be very organized about it. in fact locally it's known as the capital of Wales, Erm . . . the accent. There's a bit of a cliche erm
but that's a joke, really. . . . that people use when they're talking about the
BC Oh, I'm very organized. I have five secretaries. It's got several landmarks. One is known as the accent of this county . . . erm . . . they say 'There's
But what I do is, every day that I'm at home, Liver Building, and that's right on the riser. It's a trouble at t'mill'. Now, that't' (of) course stands
like today, you see, (mumble) until you could great big building with two towers, and on each for 'the' - trouble in the mill - but in actual fact,
come at four o'clock, I erm . . . I write between tower there's an enormous bird, which is called it's never actually sounded, so you'd say 'trouble
six and seven thousand words. Yesterday I the Liver bird. There's also . . . we've got two in mill, trouble in ... trouble in mill.' Erm . . .
did eight thousand by mistake, which was cathedrals, and they're at opposite ends of a long there's odd words, like 'lakin", that's messin1
between ten-past one and half-past three. And I street, which is called Hope Street. One's a about, playin' about, lakin' about. And you might
lie on the sofa, and I shut my eyes, and I . . . Catholic cathedral, and it's very modern - looks say 'I'm off whoam now1 - 'I'm goin' 'ome.'
just tell the story. I make very few corrections, like, you know, a rocket that's about to take off. And there's a motto for this county, which sums
actually, I only cut the paragraphs if they're too And the other one is traditional. up another characteristic of the county people,
long. And erm . . . the thing is that when I want The industry, of course, being a port, is mainly which is meant to be a sort of meanness erm and
a plot, I . . . I say a prayer. I say 'I want a plot. shipping and the docks. There's a lot of unem- . . . also a sort of knowingness. Anyway, the
Don't give me two 'cos it's terribly inconveni- ployment in our city and it causes a lot of bother. motto is 'See all, 'ear all, say nowt; eat all, sup all,
ent' (laughs) and er . . . the plot is there ! I It's a depressed area, really. The attitude of people pay nowt; and if thou ever does owt for nowt,
mean, I can't explain why, but instantly I have from other parts of the country is . . . isn't very always do it for thissen.'
a plot. And then I read twenty to thirty history friendly towards us. I mean, there is the north - 5 Where I live there's this huge river called the
books for every novel I write for the simple south divide. There's no getting away from it. Tyne, and now . . . this river is famous for its
reason that I'm used enormously in schools and And they all think we're lazy layabouts and good- bridge - it's got the most er . . . wonderful bridge
universities, especially in America, and so for-nothings, and they think we deserve to be out ever built in this country. It's er . . . a big, metal
everything has to be correct. I mean I take an of work, but it's n o t . . . it's not like that at all. I bridge, you know. It's been there for, oh, a long
enormous amount of trouble. I ring up the mean . . . it's really awful. time. It was one of the first metal bridges ever
Indian embassy if I've got a train going at a People often laugh at our acccent, but it's become built, I think. And er . . . it's called the Tyne
certain date, 'cos I write in the past, you see, very famous throughout the entire world because Bridge, you know, and it's . . . it's famous.
and say, 'Had the trains got as far as Pesha- of four very special musicians, called the Beatles. And er . . . it's one of the great landmarks of
war?' If they hadn't, I don't put it in, you see. Erm . . . it's an accent where we talk through our er. . . this town. And erm . . . on one side it's
And I do all those little things. And the other noses, I think, a lot of the time. I think that might called Tyneside, you know. It's funny that,
day I was doing one er . . . going to er . . . to be the damp from the river! But erm . . . It's because both sides are Tyne side, really, but
Holland, you see, to Rotterdam, and I found called Scouse. anyway just one side is called Tyneside, and
out exactly when they . . . where they went you're actually a Tynesider if you live there. And
from in England, what it cost and how long it 3 Well, there be two parts to where I come from. I would say the main industry is er. . . coal, you
took. I mean, person . . . they don't all There be the moors, and they can be bleak, wild know, you've got mines all over the place.
know . . . but the Americans love it, because places, with mists and howlin' winds, and you can A lot of people, you know, from up there
they say they have a history lesson and a see the smugglers as are used to be. And then we emigrate because the weather is dreadful up there.
geography lesson in everything I write, and I go' (got) lush, green countryside, with palm trees It's all cold and rainy, you know. And er ... a lot
enjoy it because I like to be . . . to have ; and plants and flowers as you don' see elsewhere, of people got to places like well, Canada or
perfection. 'cos you don' ge' (get) no frosts where I comes America, you know. Now, with regard to the
from. Heh . . . it be often wet, though, with grey accent, as you can hear, it's a bit strange, but, you
UNIT 9 sea mists and drizzle comin' off the cliffs. know, it can be even stranger. If you're a real
Where I comes from is famous for clotted cream Geordie, you say things like er. . . instead of 'I'm
Tapescript 22a . . . and pasties. Now there be a meal an' arrf (and going home1, you say things like 'I'm gannin yem;
I'm gannin yem, hinny'. And nobody understands
A variety of accents a half). Men use' take pasties into the fields for what you're saying, if you come south, you know.
lunch - potato, carrot, p'raps some meat, all
1 Hello there! I come fer (from) a large town, and wrapped in pastry. You don' ge' good 'uns now, Tapescript 22b
it's on a very big river, and the big river goes out though.
to the sea, and once upon a time the place where I We be warm folk, we look after usselves, we ain' 'Where I'm from1
come fer used to build ships, and these ships went so keen on formers (foreigners) from up country,
all over the world. And people went everywhere. though. We li' (like) takin' arr (our) time over 1 I'm fer Glasgow.
You could get ships to Ireland, you could get things, there be no poin' rushin' 'bout. If summun 2 I'm from Liverpool.
ships to your Far East, you could get ships to (someone) say 'I do it drekkly (directly) free (for 3 I be from Cornwall.
England. But no' anymore, because the industry's you), m' dear', it mean I do it in the nex' three 4 I'm from Huddersfield, in the West Riding of
all gone now. There's nae mair (no more) o' that month'. Heh. We have arr (our) own accent,
stuff. course we do. We say 'Oh arr!' for 'Oh yes!' We Yorkshire.
Now the town is broken up into two pieces. say 'How you seemin'?' 'I urrai (I'm alright).' An' 5 I come from Newcastle.
You've got the East End, and that's where all the we say Time furra touchpipes' - that's 'time furra
poor people come fer, and you've got the West break, time furra rest'. An' we might have some UNIT 10
End. That's where . . . the university is. You've crib, that's sum'n (something) to eat mid-mornin'.
got all the posh people down that way. You get Tapescript 23
people like . . . talk in funny ways. They talk Ooh, arr. We have us own ways.
posh. 'You ken when I mean?' But, where I come I come from a very big county. Erm . . . there's a A political speech
fer, it's all high-rise blocks and motorways. In the huge variety of scenery in it. There's hills and
old days - do you know what I mean? - there was dales, and there's er . . . sweeping sort of bleak Ladies and er. . . Gentlemen. I would like to talk to
the Gorbals and there was tenement flats, and moors as well er. . . and some sort of rugged you for a moment about the current er . . . situation.
aye! Folks were rough, you ken? But underneath coastline. At one time, there was a huge amount Never before has this country faced such a crisis
all that, it was friendly. You know? You get of industry there - manufacturing, textile and steel point and what is needed is courage and honesty.
people upstairs, you get your friends down the industry, but now of course, a lot of those have Should we fail to deal with the situation firmly, the
close, and everybody going together. And what closed down, and other industries have come in. consequences could be er . . . absolutely disastrous
can you say about the weather? Well, you ken, The people up there have a sort of a . . . a double for us all . It is at moments such as this that the true
there's a great word for it when it's kind of raining reputation. They . . . they're both meant to be character of a nation shines through, but I seriously
and a wee bit damp. It's drich. And it looks drich. er . . . warm-hearted and hospitable, but at the believe that the right action taken now will resolve
I'll tell you, it looks drich. same time you hear they're very suspicious of the problems that have faced us so menacingly.
strangers. And where I come from, we call them (Applause) What we must all realize is that the way
'comers-in'. And you're a comer-in even if you've
been living in the town for twenty years or so.
Erm . . . the weather is . . . is very mixed. It can
be er .. . very . . . very good weather and very . . .
153
ahead is hard, and sacrifices must be made, but on aware of where they are on that class ladder, and Baby Worm . . . and they come to a mound of
no account and in no circumstances must our resolve of course they want to climb, and to climb they sand . . . and each worm goes through the
be shaken. It is quite obvious that those who do not need to know who's above them and who's below mound of sand and when they come out the
firmly believe, as I do, that this is so, are mistaken. them. Baby Worm looks back and says 'Oh that's
Were we to act as they suggest, we would face a I The Royal Family is very widely featured in the strange, there's only two holes.'
Mtuation from which we might never recover, and press in Britain. There seem to be stories about
this must not be allowed to happen. (Applause) I them in the British newspapers, especially stories (pause)
iincerely hope that you will join with me in saying about the younger and more glamorous members
"Yes' to what I am proposing, because saying 'No' of the Royal Family, every day. How do you go Now you can tell that to people and they sit
»ould mean not only that I was defeated, but also about finding new information out about the around wondering and they say 'Well aren't
that I was wrong. Thank you. Royals? worms hermaphrodites or maybe they went
D There are, of course, about thirty-five members of through the same holes . . . " and all sorts of
Tapescript 24 the Royal Family if you take the oldest, the great things.
Queen Mother, down to the youngest. And all of I That's easy . . .
Interview with Nigel Dempster them are doing something every day, and if dB The answer is . . . (laughs) David Brown has
they're not, they should be. And it's very the answer . . . the answer is that Baby Worm
I = Interviewer easy to find out stories because the people around couldn't count!
D = Nigel Dempster them tend to tell you what's happening, so
therefore you've got a filter of information Tapescript 26
I Yo»'re by far Britain's best-known and most coming all the way through. The Royal Family
widely read gossip columnist. Is there a serious have got many staff, many people around them, Interview with Tony Buzan
fMBpose in what you write in the Daily Mail or from detectives, from household staff, who do
are you chiefly concerned simply to entertain gossip wherever they have time off, and stories I = Interviewer
jo* readers? do tend to come out. Therefore, there is a prepon- TB = Tony Buzan
derance of stories about the Royal Family, and
D We're basically concerned with informing our they tend usually to be highly accurate. And This interview was broadcast on LBC (London
readers. Obviously if we entertain them at the of course, we tend to find them amusing because Broadcasting Company) radio.
sane time that's an added bonus. But information they live rich and gilded lives, and they have a
is why people buy newspapers, because they want certain duty to the British public because the I A certain Professor Rosenweig tells us that the
B find what's going on in places where they British public pays them nearly six million brain can take in ten new bits of information
cannot be and they rely on me and my staff and pounds a year reimbursing their expenses, they every second for an entire lifetime and still be
my colleagues in the Daily Mail to bring them have a certain duty to be exposed to the British not more than half full. Well that information is
what actually happens in places of power and public via the Press. a little mindbending in itself. The abilities of
privilege, places where they would like to be but I You often see much more outrageous and explicit the brain and what the job of the brain is, are
obviously can never get inside. stories about the .Royal Family in foreign discussed in a book called The Evolving Brain
newspapers and magazines. Do you have any by Tony Buzan and Terence Dixon. Tony
I Do most of the people whose names appear in the particularly extreme examples of inaccurate Buzan is Director of the Learning Methods
Mail Diary spend their time trying to avoid reporting of the Royal Family by foreign Group and he told me whether our belief that
getting their names in the Diary or are there more journalists? the brain of a young child is more receptive
people who are actually on the telephone to you D All reporting of the Royal Family by foreign than that of an adult, whether our belief that
trying to get you to print their names in the Mail journalists is inaccurate, and in fact it's a total that is the case is true.
Diary? invention. France Dimanche, which is a Sunday
The very nature of a gossip column is that people newspaper in France,based in Paris, has a gossip TB Historically we ... we tend to absorb more
do not enjoy featuring in it because when we column which is one hundred per cent invention. information when we're young . . . more new
write a story it is not to the subject's advantage And the Queen, who reads French, of course, information and then because we've, so to
usually, because they've done something wrong, extrememly well, and is fluent in French, has speak, learned and graduated from school or
something silly, something sexual, financial mis- great fun reading it out to her family, because, in college or whatever we've been studying, we
demeanours, something along that line or treated France Dimanche over a ten-year period, she tend to assume that we don't need to take in
someone very badly like a member of their staff, worked out that she had abdicated thirty- much more. What actually happens in terms of
and they don't enjoy being in the Daily Mail two times, she'd had cancer surgery on both her the brain's potential is that if the brain is used
Diary. Obviously there are people who'd like to breasts four hundred and thirty-two times, her properly, we can continue to learn more and
get into gossip columns - we're not the only mother had been banished to Scotland twenty- more and more the older we get.
gossip column - those people can find somewhere eight times, Lord Snowdon . . . etcetera, etcetera,
like the Express, or other newspapers, which etcetera. There is an amusement value as long I . . . and does it reach the stage though . . . does
don't mind so much what they write about, or as you start with the initial presumption that your brain reach the stage where it is more
who they write about. We take the view that nothing is . . . is true. difficult because the brain is older, to absorb
those who want to get in, don't, and those who new information?
don't want to get in, certainly do. UNIT 11
TB Well that's what has been assumed . . . er ... it
I Is gossip something people in Britain seem to Tapescript 25 can reach that stage if the brain hasn't been
enjoy more than people in other countries, as far used . . . er . . . you know if you don't use it say
as you can tell, is goss . . . is there a special taste Edward de Bono's story for twenty years and by not using I mea . . .
for gossip in Britain? you don't learn any new languages, you don't
of the worms read much, you don't stimulate it much, you
D You've got to have the basic ingredient, which is don't ask many questions and you don't try to
a homogenous society, and of course we've all I = Interviewer get many answers . . .
lived cheek by jowl with each other for nine dB = Edward de Bono
hundred years, more or less, and therefore we all I You just use the information you have in order
know who we are, whether it's the rich man I Usually we think in a straightforward, perhaps to live (unclear)
in his castle or the poor man at his gate. We all we could call it vertical way, using a certain
understand who the Duke of Marlborough is, or amount of logic. Lateral thinking is a different TB Yeah . . . you kind of go on automatic, if you
what he represents, even though we don't know way of thinking according to Dr de Bono, like. If you do that for twenty years and then
the Duke of Marlborough. And therefore we all perhaps demonstrated well by one of his you suddenly say to the brain, you know, 'Now
have an interest in each other, because we stories. work out these problems, learn this do that' . . .
can equate to any story, we can equate to stories and so on and so forth, it goes into shock for a
about people who live at one end of the country, dB The story is of three worms who go for a walk little while because it literally hasn't been used
even though we live at the other end, which you and there's Mummy Worm, Daddy Worm, and to it. But if you continue to stimulate it, it will
can't do in vast places like America. Also we've start to get better. So the only situations in
got a very strictly structured class system, which which brains normally get worse are really the
starts with the Monarchy at the top and goes all kind of major disease or physical damage or
the way down to the lower classes at the bottom. simply non-use.
And everyone within that class system is totally
I What are the things that er the brain is
responsible for that we don't generally
associate with it?
154
TB It seems in fact that our brain is responsible for I That was . . . e r . . . Tony Buzan, Director of extremely small volume, you can imagine the
virtually the whole lot! I mean anything you the Learning Methods Group, talking about galaxies touching. That event is called the Big
can think of that human beings do, the brain is that marvellous piece of machinery you carry Bang, and the key question is not just how did
responsible . . . is responsible for every piece around with you every day, the brain, which it happen, but whether that is the first instant in
of classical music that's ever been written; it's we are assured, is evolving. the history of the universe, because it is
responsible for all the buildings all around the perfectly possible that the universe has so
world; it's responsible for every creative UNIT 12 much matter in it, that the present expansion of
thought; it's responsible for the way in which the universe will one day slow down and stop,
everybody moves. People used to say, for Tapescript 27 the expansion to be followed by a contraction,
example, that the artist or the person who was all the galaxies plummetting in towards each
good with his hands somehow wasn't Interview with Carl Sagan other. In which case it is perfectly possible that
brainy . . . but I mean what is it that's moving we live in an infinitely old universe, in which
the hands? What is it that's creating that, for A = Announcer all the galaxies, stars, planets, and living
example, sculpture out there in space? It's the BH = Brian Hayes organisms are ground to cosmic ashes, at each
brain which is using those hands to recreate CS = Dr Carl Sagan cusp in the cycle. If that is the sort of universe
outside of itself an image that it's got inside. we live in, then there's no need to understand a
A This is an interview that Dr Carl Sagan gave to creation, since it was always here. There's no
I Mmm . . . it sounds as if the brain . . . er ... is the LBC (London Broadcasting Company). beginning.
limitless because if you talk about the history The interviewer is Brian Hayes. BH And is it because the human mind can't cope
of mankind, and you realize that it is only in with that concept that we're constantly trying
the past few thousand years that we've come to BH 'We've examined the universe in space, and to find a beginning?
understand anything about the brain . . . erm seen that we live on a mote of dust, circling a CS Perhaps, but we also can't co . . . cope with the
. . . and when you think about how many years humdrum star, in the remotest corner of an concept of a creation, because I know of no
we've got to go ... obscure galaxy.' Well, they're the words of Dr plausible explanation of how that happened.
Carl Sagan, which put us into some kind of There is a standard explanation, which is 'God
TB ... Yes •cosmic context. The task of communicating the did it', but er . . . it seems to me that logic
I Er ... the mind does tend to boggle a little history of the universe was taken on by requires that we take the next step and ask
Dr Sagan in a television series which we'll see 'Where did God come from?', and somehow
(laughter) . . . and you think w h a t . . . er . . . we later this year, and a book called Cosmos, the theologians all blanch at that er . . . at that
could actually know about the brain, what we published last week. Carl Sagan is Director of question, and say 'God was always here'. Well,
could actually do with the brain in three the Laboratory for Planetary Studies at Cornell that's fine, but why not save a step and simply
thousand years from now . . . University. He's been involved in the Mariner, say that the universe was always here ?
TB That's right, I mean it is the brain 'boggling' Viking, and Voyager projects. There's been
now about its own capacity. much-argument recently, especially in Califor- Tapescript 28
I We've been talking about the evolution of the nia, about Man's origin. Was Darwin right? Do
:: brain. Has it increased in size? the creationists have a point? Why should we Desiderata
TB Er . . . yes it has, it's been increasing over the still be arguing about it?
last little while. That's partly because of the . . . Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember
er . . . obviously . . . improvement in many of CS Because er . . . Darwin is again disquieting. what peace there may be in silence. As far as
the diets. What it has improved in though, is its Er . . . many people who feel that there should possible without surrender be on good terms with all
ability to use the different parts of itself be something special and central about human persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly and
and . . . its awareness of itself and really in beings are unhappy about the quite compelling listen to others, even the dull and ignorant: they too
terms of evolution the brain has only just evidence that we are just another animal have their story.
started. It's a very, very new development, the connected by many powerful lines of evidence, Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are
human brain. Evolution's been going on for in an evolutionary sense, to the great apes and vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with
perhaps some twenty billion years and yet monkeys and the other primates. Um and er . . . others you may become vain and bitter; for always
Homo sapiens, you know . . . us ... has only they're made unhappy by this. But I think it's there will be greater and lesser person than yourself.
been around for one and a half million, I mean so much more elevating to find that we are Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
it's almost nothing. deeply connected with all the other living Keep interested in your own career however
I Well . . . I suppose if it evolves to the stage things on the Earth, than to imagine that there's humble; it is a real possession in the changing
where . . . I mean the head becomes consider- something particularly special. If we want to fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business
ably lar . . . larger to house this larger brain, it make something special about ourselves, it is affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this
is already very heavy indeed, isn't it? ... the within our power to do so. But the idea that we not blind you to what virtue there is. Many persons
head? It would mean possibly there would be are special through some unearned grace seems strive for high ideals and everywhere life is full of
other physical evolution to cope with it. to me a little peculiar. heroism. Be yourself. Especially, do not feign
TB Yes . . . er . . . I mea . . . first of all, at the affection. Neither be cynical about love, for in the
moment we don't need to have it any BH The creationists, though, also now seem to be - face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is perennial
bigger . . . er ... we've got a massive capacity and I don't know how it stands up, but - putting as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years,
in there that we're not even using but if we forward what they claim to be a scientific gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture
could perhaps imagine a time when we are argument for a creation as it was told in the strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
using the brain generally to its full extent, erm . . . Old Testament. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many
there's a large possibility that it will begin to fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a
expand. That may happen in space. There've CS Er . . . they have claimed to do that, but when wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.
been a lot of interesting researches done . . . you look closely it turns out that er . . . nothing You are a child of the universe no less than the trees
I In which case the weight . . . the weight of the sort is being done, and their ideas are and the stars. You have a right to be here. And
becomes less important . . . utterly bankrupt. whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the
TB Yes, and . . . and the various parts of the body universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at
will obviously change because it won't need BH If it didn't begin when the creationists say the peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be;
the bones as it used to, because it'll be in a universe began, when and how did it? and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the
fundamentally weightless environment perhaps noisy confusions of life keep peace with your soul.
and in that case it may be that the brain will CS Well, 'When?' is one question and 'How?' is With all its sham and drudgery and broken dreams,
just continue to expand and expand . . . and it quite another question. Er . . .there seems to be it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be
has been hypothesized that if some humans do er . . . very strong, although perhaps not happy.
leave the planet and they live permanently in absolutely compelling evidence, that the
space and breed and breed and breed and universe is expanding, the more distant galax-
breed, that within a very few generations the ies are running away from us er. . . faster than
creature in space will be very different from us, the nearby galaxies, and if we run this cosmic
and may well have a much larger basic brain movie backwards, we find that some fifteen
capacity. thousand million years ago, all the matter in the
universe, and all the energy, was confined to an
155
Acknowledgements Syndication International (1986) Ltd.: '10 years Sempe Cartoons © Christian Charlton
The publishers and authors would like to thank for mob leader' from the London Daily News Tony Stone Worldwide
the following for their kind permission to use of 11 May 1987. Summerhill School
articles, extracts, or adaptations from copyright The Sunday Times
material: The Economist: extract (television statistics) Jim Thompson © King Features Syndicate
from the issue of 20 December 1986. Topham Picture Library
Aitken & Stone Ltd.: extract from The Murder Transworld Features Syndicate (UK) Ltd.
of Roger Ackroyd by Agatha Christie. Times Newspapers Ltd.: 'Stop being coy' by Trog © Reader's Digest
Bryan Heath from The Sunday Times of 29 John Walmsley Photo Library
Geoffrey Beattie: 'Meet the burglar' from the June 1980. Zefa
Guardian of 20 October 1984.
Times Newspapers Ltd.: 'Test your aptitude for Illustrations by:
The Bodley Head Ltd.: extract from My learning a foreign language' from The Sunday
Autobiography by Charles Chaplin. Times of 6 January 1985. Kevin Baverstock
Keith Bendis
The Bodley Head Ltd. and Ed Victor Ltd.: Polly Toynbee: 'The upper class' from the Jacqueline Bissett
extract from War by Gwynne Dyer. Guardian of 13 August 1979. Peter Clarke
Karen Ludlow
Bucks & Herts Newspapers Ltd.: 'Night Victor Gollancz Ltd. and Curtis Brown Ltd.: Chris Priestley
intruder fined £110' from the Bucks Herald of extracts from Summerhillby A. S. Neill. Axel Scheffler
14 May 1987. Published by Victor Gollancz Ltd. and Harold RDH Artists
Hart Publishing. Copyright © 1960 by A. S. Paul Richardson
Chappell Music Ltd.: 'Mad Dogs and Neill. Brian Walker
Englishmen', written and composed by Noel Paula Youens
Coward. © 1942 Chappell Music Limited. Viking Penguin Inc. and G. T. Sassoon: 'They'
from Collected Poems by Siegfried Sassoon. Location photography by Rob Judges
Chatto & Windus: extract from Cider with Rosie Copyright 1918 by E. P. Dutton Co. All rights Studio Photography by Mark Mason
by Laurie Lee. reserved.
Every effort has been made to trace the owners
The Daily Telegraph'. 'Former judge sentenced The publishers would also like to thank the of copyright material used in this book, but we
over driving offences' from the issue of 9 May following for their permission to reproduce should be pleased to hear from any copyright
1987. photographs, illustrations, and cartoons. holder whom we have been unable to contact.
The Guardian: 'Double rapist jailed for 10 Chris Addams © The New Yorker Magazine The authors would like to thank the writers of
years' from the issue of 12 May 1987. Inc. various standard reference books, especially
Randolph Quirk, Sidney Greenbaum, Geoffrey
The Hamlyn Publishing Group Ltd. for extracts All-Action Picture Library Leech, and Jan Svartvik (A Grammar of
from My Early Life by Winston Churchill. Ancient Art and Architecture Collection Contemporary English); Jake Allsop (Cassell's
Arcaid Student's English Grammar); Michael Swan:
Harper's Magazine: 'Goodbye Dr Spock' by Sally Artz © Reader's Digest (Practical English Usage), and Hugh Gethin
James Traub. Adapted from the March 1986 Nick Baker'(c) Reader's Digest (Grammar in Context). We would also like to
issue by special permission. Anthony Blake thank the people at Oxford University Press for
Butlins their undying help and encouragement. Our
The Independent'. 'Driver jailed' from the issue Quentin Blake © Jonathan Cape Ltd. thanks go too to Richard Carrington for his
of 12 May 1987. Bridgeman Art Library interviews with Graham Greene and the soldiers
Richard Bryant from the 1914 Christmas Truce. Finally, we
The Independent: 'Tarzan of Central Park' by Camera Press would like to thank Tim Lowe, who read the
Alexander Chancellor from the issue of 8 Barbara Cartland manuscript and made most helpful comments.
October 1986. Colorific
Colorsport
Jonathan Cape Ltd., and Farrar, Straus and Dominic Photography
Giroux Inc.: 'Little Red Riding Hood and the Douglas Dickins Photo Library
Wolf from Revolting Rhymes by Roald Dahl. Greg Evans Photo Library
Mary Evans Picture Library
Laurence Pollinger Ltd. and Simon & Schuster: Gloucester Record Archives
extract from The Human Factor by Graham Ronald Grant Archive
Greene. Published by The Bodley Head Ltd. Sally & Richard Greenhill
Copyright © 1978 by Graham Greene. Hoest © Parade
Michael Holford
The London Evening Standard: '5 years for boy BBC Hulton Picture Library
who killed a school bully' in the issue of 19 Women's Journal
December 1986. The Keystone Collection
The Kobal Collection
David Lorimer: 'On the brink of tranquillity' The estate of Fernand Leger, 1881-1955
from the Guardian of 19 December 1985. ('The Red Statuette') © DACS 1989
Magnum
Mail Newspapers pic: 'Exposed! The fine art of Ken Mahood © Punch 1981
Artspeak' by Jonathan Margolis from the Mansell Collection
Daily Mail of 22 February 1987. Marks and Spencer pic
Merseyside County Museum
Michael Joseph Ltd. and Multimedia The estate of Joan Miro, 1893-1983
Publications Inc.: extract from Mindwatching ('Harlequin's Carnival') © ADAGP (Paris);
by Hans and Michael Eysenck. DACS (London) 1989
Mizz
Mills and Boon Ltd.: extract from Marriage in Gene Myers © Good Housekeeping
Haste, 1980 by Sue Peters. Next
Private Eye
Murray Pollinger: 'Parson's Pleasure' from Kiss Ken Pyne © Reader's Digest
Kiss by Roald Dahl, published by Michael Radley College
Joseph Ltd. and Penguin Books Ltd. Rex Features Ltd
(abridged version by Reader's Digest). Ronald Sheridans Photo Library
Science Photo Library
Oxford University Press: dictionary entries from William Scully © Punch 1973
Oxford Advanced Learner's Dictionary, 4th
edition, 1989.
Robson Books Ltd.: extracts from How to Live
to be 100 - or More: The Ultimate Diet, Sex,
and Exercise Book by George Burns.
Rupert Hart-Davis and Random House, New
York: extract fromT/ie Greafesf by
Muhammad Ali.
The Scottish Health Education Group and
Parents Anonymous Inc. USA: 'Children
learn what they live'.
The Society of Authors: extracts from
Pygmalion by George Bernard Shaw.
Reprinted by permission of the Society of
Authors on behalf of the Bernard Shaw
Estate.
156
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