ECHOES VOL 38
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ECHOES
ROCKVILLE HIGH SCHOOL
210 0 B A L T I M O R E R O A D
R O C K V I L L E , M A R Y L A N D 2 0 851
[email protected]
RHSECHOES.COM
ARACHNID NEST BY JOSH ABUNDO (FRONT COVER)
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EDITOR’S
PREFACE
We’ve been hit with a whirlwind of unexpected events that has altered social norms. These changes
have severly impacted our lives as individuals, communities, and Echoes as a whole. Last year, we were
excited to present the many pieces submitted to us by Rockville’s talented students. We got to the point where
we were beginning to create and publish our actual magazine. It was during this time when schools closed
and the whole country slowly began to shut down. Initially, we had hoped for a return to school where we
could finish our magazine and school year. Due to the drastic spread of the coronavirus, the remainder of
the school year was cancelled and our efforts were brought to a halt. These unexpected events impacted the
entire student body. Personally, I (Tiffany) was a senior when everything hit. I felt as though the magazine
was taken away, Prom was taken away, graduation was taken away, and seeing our friends one final time
was taken away. These unexpected changes affected the mental health of so many young students including
myself. I felt as though I lost everything. We knew something had to be done to commemorate all of the hard
work put into the magazine last year by the artists, writers, Echoes section staff, as well as Sam and I.
A few months after leaving school, Mr. Pang, Sam, and I got back together and began brainstorming
how we could celebrate everything we accomplished. Knowing we would not be able to publish a hard copy
of the magazine, we embraced the challenges presented. We chose to preserve our work and push all of our
efforts to the following year. Mr. Pang, Sam, the new Junior Managing Editor, Daniela, and I would discuss
how to incorporate last year’s work into this year’s magazine almost daily. However, with the virus still
preventing a return to school when fall came around, we were unsure if it would be possible to have a return
to Echoes. Once again, we were determined to figure out a solution. Knowing we could not create a
physical production, we decided to create an online magazine showcasing two years’ worth of student work
and Echoes’ diligence. As you can see, this specific magazine has allowed for the Rockville community to
connect once again to display the talent and greatness of its students and alumni. Even after being away from
school and our friends for an extended period of time, we have learned to adapt to the challenges we’ve
faced and still come back as Echoes to bring you this magazine.
Written by,
Tiffany Ashley Reyes, Senior Managing Editor 2019 - 2020
Sam Brami, Senior Managing Editor 2020 - 2021
Daniela Colombi, Junior Managing Editor 2020 - 2021
#4#E#CHECOHEOS ES
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Touched by Madison Dieffenbach
ECHECOHEOS E#S#5#
STAFF ART Brian Vu
Josh Abundo
2019 Daniela Colombi Khang Tran
2020 Ruslana Bukalo Yahan Chang
Lily Grigor Byron Orantes
SENIOR MANAGING EDITOR Bryant Rivera Oscar Diaz
Celeste Shiflett
Tiffany Ashley Reyes Narai Maldonado Lily Natchipolsky
Rahma Ahmed
JUNIOR MANAGING EDITOR POETRY Sarah Carey
Sam Brami Casey Majewski Olivia Teitelbaum
Gabe Santiago Patrick Cutter
DESIGN MANAGERS Kristen D’Souza Shane Hawkins
Stella Shanker
Olivia Turner FICTION Sue Goh
ART EDITOR Liesl Ament Jileen DeGuzman
Alex Rios Nic Bloom
Daniela Colombi Daniel de Leon Rachel Warren
Ethan Santiago
POETRY EDITOR Ezekiel Hernandez
Marissa Hartman
Casey Majewski
NON-FICTION
NON-FICTION EDITOR
Mary Pankowski
Liesl Ament Drew Roane
Catherine Corbin
FICTION EDITOR
Mary Pankowski
WEB DESIGN
Nicholas Shpiece
ADVISOR
Sean Pang
6 ECHOES
2020 ART STAFF
2021
Daniela Colombi Sayeda Hasni
SENIOR MANAGING EDITOR Adi Elfassi Colleen Kelly
Dayle Joseph Narai Maldonado
Sam Brami Ruslana Bukalo Ayah Guedda
Byron Orantes Brendan Kalinock
JUNIOR MANAGING EDITOR Oscar Diaz
Rahma Ahmed
Daniela Colombi POETRY Sarah Carey
Jazmin Lee
DESIGN MANAGER Casey Majewski
Lily Natchipolsky Maya Barney
Olivia Turner Gabe Santiago Alexia Moser
Zachary Abundo Ethan Santiago
ART EDITOR Hanna Alsakir
FICTION
Daniela Colombi Drew Roane
Alex Rios Will Holland
POETRY EDITOR Lili Bao Kayleigh Scholes
Olivia Teitelbaum Ezekiel Hernandez
Casey Majewski Shane Hawkins Stef Barrios
Julia Carter
NON-FICTION EDITOR
NON-FICTION
Jileen DeGuzman
Jileen DeGuzman
FICTION EDITOR Gabby Diaz
Bryant Rivera-Cortez
Alex Rios Kaitlyn McMahon
Catherine Corbin
WEB DESIGN
Nicholas Shpiece & Catherine Corbin
ADVISOR
Sean Pang
ECHOES 7
CONTENTS
VOLUME 38
POETRY 22 Packing Up and Moving by Suhyun Goh
33 Senior Year by Kristina Mobley
11 The Girl Who Flew by Cecilia Funk 34 The Monster Within by Victoria Padgett
12 The Ruins by Casey Majewski 30 Mine Angel by Erin Swan
15 Faraway by Casey Majewski 18 We Stand Together by Julia Carter
61 The Beer Bottle Breaks by Fatima Mahmoudi 27 Him by Casey Majewski
43 The Vultures by Lilly Natchipolsky 63 Probability of You by Camila Radin
29 Circles by Gabe Santiago 40 Her Perfume by Mary Pankowski
53 Do You Know Fear by Casey Majewski 44 On the Clock by Maccio High
36 Stargazer by Josephine Stahl
38 Nude by Oni Tomiwa
21 Loneliness by Casey Majewski
NONFICTION FICTION
91 Fear by Daniel Covino 86 The Rise and Fall of Padrarkovan by Liesl Ament
47 Thinking About Sorrow by Daniel Covino 76 Bucket List by Julia Carter
48 The Kallie Khronicles by Liesl Ament 94 Life and Death by Liesl Ament
66 A Short Work on the Nature of God by Daniel Covino 80 Mahatma Khandi by Stella Shanker
82 It’s Just Like Riding a Bike by Alexia Moser 89 Amelia Earheart: Woman of Mars by Liesl Ament
54 My Story by Farhia Mohamed 70 Moving On by Alexia Moser
74 Bugs by Daniel Covino 56 Monster by Mackenzie Jones
58 A Wild Side of My Own by Camilla Rivera 78 Snow Angels Josephine Stahl
84 What Happened in Eighth Grade by Julia Carter 92 The Long Road that Never Ends by Nick Stillwell
8 ECHOES
ART CONTENTS
16 The Sands of Time by Madison Dieffenbach 46 Self Portrait by Jakob Novara
32 No Arms, No Legs by Cecilia Funk 81 Lilith’s Retribution by Josh Abundo
35 The Lion Sleeps Tonight by Madison Dieffenbach 31 Swimmingly by Josh Abundo
83 Han by Bryant Rivera 67 Escape from the Ground by Josh Abundo
51 Background Noise 1 by Cecilia Funk 1 Arachnid Nest by Josh Abundo
87 Berceto by Daniela Colombi 23 Red Hat by Josh Abundo
5 Touched by Madison Dieffenbach 62 Imminent Threat by Josh Abundo
52 Erin by Bryant Rivera 88 The Uprooted by Josh Abundo
38 Tundra by Liesl Ament 55 Eyes on Me by Josh Abundo
39 Ladybird by Brian M Vu 42 She Approaches by Josh Abundo
77 Shimmering Rain by Madison Dieffenbach 93 Always Something by Christina Belluscio
13 A Minor Inconvience by Liesl Ament 19 Out of the Ashes by Christina Belluscio
74 Flutter Bye by Madison Dieffenbach 10 Breath of Beauty by Christina Belluscio
49 Background Noise 2 by Cecilia Funk 90 Nature’s Eyes by Christina Belluscio
60 Kalamari by Liesl Ament 70 Soul Essence by Christina Belluscio
95 Icarus Flew by Cecilia Funk
72 Spring in the Wardrobe by Madison Dieffenbach
26 Dancing Lights by Madison Dieffenbach
45 Cake by Liesl Ament
64 Lost in the Stacks by Madison Dieffenbach
59 Cream Puffs by Liesl Ament
79 Athens by Liesl Ament
14 Sunrise Departure by Liesl Ament
85 Remember When You’d Sing by Cecilia Funk
28 Wonder by Mary Pankowski
37 Fantasy by Mary Pankowski
24 Crossbeams by Madison Dieffenbach
20 Window by Jakob Novara
57 Cage by Jakob Novara
ECHOES 9
POETRY
BREATH
OF BEAUTY
Christina
Belluscio
10 ECHOES
POETRY
THE GIRL WHO FLEW
Cecilia Funk
Watch as she sails
on the wind like a sheet
hung out to dry
in the summer sun
The billowing
fabric of her dress
changes color as
she spins
like a helicopter seed
flying up
towards the clouds
and then
She falls
Not as Icarus fell
drunk on freedom and sunlight
But like a butterfly
clipped in the wing
by a stone thrown
Falling
As gracefully as she flew
Her wings catching
sun and wind
before she lands in the dust
And there she lays
Another pretty dead thing
to be examined
by curious eyes
ECHOES 11
POETRY
THE RUINS
Casey Majewski
The ruins you left my soul in
Are no longer visible
It truly must be a sin
To not even be plausible
The ruins you left for me
Are so useless that even an architect would sigh
The broken statues and buildings are a sight to see
As I stand up and once again, I try
It seems that everytime I construct a new building
You find a mistake
It’s already breaking, falling, tilting
And as you destroy it, I lower my head and pick up my rake
There are few buildings that have remained upright
You knocked over the ones I had built closest
And even the strongest material could not outstand your bite
And as your venom pulsed through those structures, I looked at the situation and tried to find a bonus
The monumental walls are the only ones that are still standing
They are the small ones I created behind your back
And I built them higher until you could not ignore their expanding
Even as you tried to burn them, they all returned with a clapback
Believe it not, some structures have an almost impossible will to remain
Stronger than your will to destroy
Those monuments don’t give into erosion, destruction, or rain
They don’t burn like you want them to, like you enjoy
These monuments are the structures that keep me safe from you
They use their strong material and willpower to protect me
They know don’t have to question who
They are fighting for, they know who has the key
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POETRY
A MINOR INCONVIENCE
Liesl Ament
ECHOES 13
SECTION SECTION
SUNRISE DEPARTURE
Liesl Ament
14 ECHOES
FARAWAY
Casey Majewski
Another bruise had appeared
She knew what it meant
She cried as her mascara smeared
She cried until she was spent
She knew he was suffering
Somewhere very far away
And she knew there was no buffering
The pain in the grey
She wanted to hug him
But didn’t yet know who he was
All she knew was the grim
But she could guess the cause
She knew that he was hurting
And there was nothing she could do
Because she didn’t want to be asserting
If only he knew
If only he knew how much she cried
She cried for him and his pain
As her eyes opened wide
And let out the rain
ECHOES 15
Madison
THE SANDS OF TIME Dieffenbach
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POETRY
WE STAND
TOGETHER
Julia Carter
Can you feel it?
The ground trembling, quaking under our feet
The strength of a resistant nation crumbling
A newfound unity of thousands
Battling with truth, not hate
On the hunt for justice
For humanity
For freedom
For safety
We have no more trust
We have no more faith
We make our own path
Shape our own future
We stand our ground
We stand together
We shouldn’t have to be brave
We shouldn’t have to live in a dystopian world
We aren’t heroes in a book, yet we are faced with powerful villains
It is insane that safety is a fantasy
Our lives are not disposable
We are not puppets
We will not be silenced
You will hear us cry out together
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OUT OF THE ASHES
Christina Belluscio
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POETRY
WINDOW Jakob Novara
20 ECHOES
POETRY
LONELINESS
Casey Majewski
Loneliness is unmarked territory
It has no boundaries, it crosses all borders
It can make the modest and honest fall from glory
It can trap the liars and criers in small corners
Loneliness is never positive, as it is always negative
It is the judge of justice, serving the innocent and guilty
It harbors in the orphan and the relative
It appears when they are warm or chilly
Loneliness is not exclusive to any one person
If there is one feeling the entire population experiences at least once
It would be this dreaded, awful emotion that has the ability to worsen
And defeat all from the strongest beings to the weakest runts
Loneliness enters lives in many ways, shapes, and forms
It creeps in when one is alone, in a state of peace or grief
It overwhelms when one is sheltered in another’s arms
It crowds the minds of the brief, and invades the relief
Loneliness can be the origin of discouragement and motivation
It is cause and effect, step after step, minute by minute
It isn’t patient, it is brazen with a hint of agitation
But the best part is it isn’t absolute
ECHOES 21
PACKING UP
AND MOVING
Suhyun Goh But home was not merely a place to be.
Crossing the Pacific to an alien land,
Each time she felt, as though, New to the language and the cultures
She was leaving a part of her behind, She sat listening; the birds’ unfamiliar song in hand,
Her life there dying, although An explorer of an unknown forest filled with pressures.
They’d never leave her mind, She was confined in the small space,
Again and again she complains, And even with the large park and laughing children,
With every move and with every, Her heart was stuck in a case,
Memory that has trapped her in chains, Depression wherever she ran.
Leaving her fevery.
Packing up and moving one last time,
First was the place, To a house with a park just out the door,
She considered home from birth, Perhaps it was time she started to climb,
And from her mind it will never erase, And in her eighth year here decided to venture,
Gardens filled with rich earth, Reaching out, breaking the cage that confined her heart,
Covered in cherries, peaches, roses, She became lighter as she lost the heaviness from her chest,
The house stood tall, hand-built by her pop, Edging out of her shell, her life took a turn, a new start,
Trees bearing fruit, their scent caught on noses, Starting to find the truth of how she is blessed.
One step in the house and happy nonstop.
Home was not just a place to stay,
Introduced to her first apartment, It was where she was given healing,
She started to feel dreadful and insecure Where she was loved there and away,
22 floors up too high, and at the moment, And she welcomed the feeling,
She had become homeless, her place unsure. Realizing she was home again.
The crashing ocean waves the only familiar sound,
But even that was from a different sea.
Living with work and a partner, yet still bound,
22 ECHOES
RED HAT Josh Abundo
ECHOES 23
CSECTION SECTION
R
O
S
S
B
E
A
M
S
Madison
#D#ie#ffEeCnHbOaEcSh
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DANCING
LIGHTS
Madison
Dieffenbach
HIM
Casey Majewski
The light in his eyes can be seen for miles
It shines through when he smiles
When life leaves you screaming
He can make everything as simple as breathing
He is the unusual one
He is the best choice in the long run
He stands out in certain settings
But he is the one to be around for the endings
His optimism was hard to handle at first
Especially on the days when I felt absolutely cursed
But now he can make me laugh on my worst days
And still manages to make me feel amazed
He has unknowingly taught me how to be a better person
And that listening matters most in a conversation
He has taught me that being positive is the best way to go
And that sometimes it’s okay to be slow
His loyalty rivals mine in the best way possible
To the point where mistakes are impossible
And his kindness toward everyone is so uncommon
That sometimes I wonder if he actually is the average man
He is the rays of sunshine on rainy days
And his mind is an intelligent maze
He is what keeps my head above water, the one who helps me swim
And I now know, I could never live without him
ECHOES 27
POETRY
WONDER
Mary Pankowski
28 ECHOES
POETRY
CIRCLES
Gabe Santiago
To you I applaud,
For it was you who left me completely awed, With your sickening simplicity.
All dots equidistant on a plane,
Tied to the center by an alloy steel chain.
No room for a single misplaced point.
Its circles I can only see,
All three hundred and sixty degrees.
With no true start or end,
Just pick a place and watch it bend.
A circle is not unity nor harmony,
But a mere symbol screeching,
“Nowhere is your destiny.”
Around and around, watch it go.
You never get too far
Before you find yourself back where you are.
I am dancing in circles.
I am walking in circles.
Bad choices,
Same mistakes.
How many times and chances will it take? Inane circles.
The last thing I see before I drift to sleep.
ECHOES 29
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MINE
ANGEL
Erin Swan
“Why did you fall?”, I asked one night
To mine own angel fair
“I’d tell,” she said. “But it isn’t nice”
As she combed her raven hair
“For I was built to only serve
By those who live above
But soon I found my mind had changed,
When I met you, my love.”
“The powers that be did not approve,”
Said mine own angel fair
“They believed that I’d destroyed my fate
Which left them in despair”
“They thought my fall would be a curse
And my fate I would bear
But they were proven wrong again.”
Said mine own angel fair
“For I had you right by my side
As I began to fall
And though I was afraid, my love
I knew I would be fine”
“For wings can only do so much,”
Said mine own angel fair
“In your arms I feel I can fly
Without the open air”
### ECHOES ART:
SWIMMINGLY
Josh Abundo
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POETRY
NO ARMS, NO LEGS Cecilia Funk
32 ECHOES
POETRY
SENIOR YEAR
Kristina Mobley
Oh, what a time to be alive
Racing deadlines and college applications
Life isn’t bad, if I don’t think or speak
Avoiding miscommunications
The expectations set upon me
To be a 4.0 student
But I am more of an absentee
Oh, what a time to be alive
I never thought I would be here
Standing at graduation
My dad always screamed “you lack determination”
Trained me to persevere
With deadlines approaching
All the walls are enclosing
Shocked I could get these words out
My soul cowers with self-doubt
Anxiety rising
Moods sinking
Will-power rapidly depleting
Oh, what a time to be alive.
ECHOES 33
POETRY
THE MONSTER
WITHIN
Victoria Padgett
Beating quickly while tossing
And turning my thoughts are whirling
The pulse is rolling now it’s crossing
Heads a twirling; oh wait it’s swirling
The monsters keep growing
My fear starts showing
I can’t stop, my thoughts
I think I’ll be shot
Beating quickly while tossing
And turning, I hear the voices
And their lurking, time for me
To make some choices
My silence is key
If I don’t want to bleed
Thanks to the trees I’ve fallen
Down a hole I hear voices calling
Beating quickly while tossing
And turning, my mind is blurring
The real from the fake
It’s all a mistake
I can’t seem to shake the feeling
Of my impending doom as I slip
Into my man made tomb in the ceiling
Now my heart is beginning to skip
I shoot straight up
It’s my mother’s rule
I grab my stuff
I might be late to school
34 ECHOES
POETRY
THE LION SLEEPS TONIGHT
Madison Dieffenbach
ECHOES 35
POETRY
STARGAZER
Josephine Stahl
They lived in the deserts of Erimos bright, From up in the space station he’d think of her
A small planet near to their sun. When he saw distant Erimos rise.
They were young still, and poor, not much future in sight, He loved this new work, but missed things as they were,
And not enough money to run. Not quite sure of his place in the sky.
Few people would leave, for the planet was poor, He looked forward to seeing his love again soon
And none could afford a spaceship that would fly. When he’d descend from the stars shining bright as her eyes,
But the young couple dreamed of a future with more, And he thought of her face as he studied the moons
And their hopes were both turned to the sky. For her smile sparkled bright as the sky.
And then on one cold, barren Erimos night, The year came to a close and he gathered his things
A letter came from a space station on high And watched the stars slowly streak by
Inviting the boy to join them in flight As he flew back to her on titanium wings
And their hopes were both turned to the sky. And returned to his home from the sky.
They knew he was smart, that crisp letter read. Down in the deserts of Erimos bright
They wanted him there for a year. She stood, emptiness in her eyes.
They’d pay him as much, the formal note said, She found only bitterness now in starlight,
As he’d earn in a whole decade here. With her heart turned away from the sky.
Always he’d wanted to study the stars, She was cold now, and distant, her smiles all forced,
And always they’d hoped for such luck. And he could not understand why.
With the money he’d earn in his studies afar, But soon he accepted with quiet remorse
They could leave, the pair realized, starstruck. He lost her when he went to the sky.
And so on the date that the letter had stated, They’d thought their love could endure months apart,
He boarded the transport they sent. But resentment built up through those cold lonely nights
Though this was something they’d both celebrated, As she saw the joy the stars sparked in his heart
His wife hid her quiet lament. And knew he was meant to rise to their heights.
Just one year alone was a small price to pay He’d earned money enough that they could depart
For a future, for new chances and hope. On the finest spaceship their new fortune could buy
But though this was the luck for which the couple had prayed, But now there was distance between their two hearts
She wasn’t sure how she would cope. As they finally took to the sky.
The months passed so slow as she waited alone
With just letters and calls from on high.
She’d gaze up to the darkness where all the stars shone
And her heart was turned up to the sky.
36 ECHOES
FSEACTNIONTASECSTYION
Mary
Pankowski
ECHOES ###
NUDESECTION SECTION
Oni Tomiwa
I was with you the night
before you died in monsoon
songs and rhapsodies I was
the wafting fragrance from
stray places. you came for
me with a body retouched,
with an entourage of many
things that glitter. but you
met my absence: a castle
of emptiness. because I am
the naked boy on an old
bridge, waiting for nobody.
because l am a foreigner in
the busy town, always seek-
ing directions in heavy plac-
es. and because we find
ourselves in diverse spec-
trums; I say, come alone,
come raw.
ART:
LADYBIRD
Brian M Vu
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HER PERFUME
Mary Pankowski
A boy sees a girl
Across the room
He walks over to her
He can smell her perfume
Her face lights up with a smile
And his does too
She says hi
He says “I’ve never seen you!”
They go for a date
He’s nervous as can be
He sees her smile
And it fills him with glee
Soon they start dating
She’s like a flower in bloom
He’s in love with her
He can smell her perfume
It lasts a little while
But then things change
She doesn’t feel he loves her
It all feels strange
He doesn’t treat her right
And she leaves him in gloom
He gets his hoodie back from her
He can smell her perfume.
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SHE APPROACHES Josh Abundo
THE VULTURES
Lilly Natchipolsky
You killed me
When you told me what I was
A bog on your happiness I dragged you down
While limping, dragging what was left
Of me
There was nothing
Suddenly I collapsed
You stood behind me
Cackling
Instantly I was surrounded I looked around
The only thing I saw
Were vultures
They tore my flesh
Ripped what was left of me
Right from my bones
Tearing away all that was left
My bones exposed
Vulnerable I lay silent
Nothing left I can’t come back
Not from you
Not after the vultures
Tore away my flesh
And left me to die
ECHOES 43
SECTION SECTION
ON THE CLOCK
Maccio High
Lacking rest
With so much to prove
Knowing it’s a waste of time at best
Self-detrimental to invest into
And on the clock
Knows about the hate
Knew about facades
About-face
Worried about his stocks
Worried about his pace
ART: Cake by Liesl Ament
#4#4#ECECHHOOESES
SECTION SECTION
ECECHHOOESES#4#5#
SECTIOSNESLEFCTION
PORTRAIT
Jakob Novara
### ECHOES
NONFICTION
THINKING
ABOUT SORROW
Daniel Covino
I’ll admit it, I’m cast from a certain mold. I’m depressed, anxious, sometimes not quite there, and I have a tendency
towards thinking about things for longer than I need to. Maybe I get like this because I’m so rarely truly sad? To feel sorrow
and to feel depressed are two different things, and when I am truly sorrowful I could almost jump for joy. Depression is
emptiness and exhaustion, while sorrow is tears. It’s nice to be sad, when I know what it’s like to feel nothing at all. It’s nice to
feel the tears run down my cheeks, nice to know sobs instead of silence. Sadness is a driver, it makes you think, makes you
wonder, makes you appreciate. Depression just takes. It takes your happiness, it takes your anger, it takes your motivation,
it takes your simple pleasures, and in the end it takes even your sorrow. It’s why I’ve learned to appreciate these times when
I’m really and truly sad.
It’s an alien feeling, to me. Sadness comes around every few weeks, and often I can’t recognize quite what it is.
Depression replaces it in my mind, so that to feel nothing is to reach the height of emotion.
The last time I cried was a simple breakdown. I felt stressed, I felt alone, I felt broken up inside and without hope or
real understanding of the world around me. So I spoke, and I cried.
The time before that was at my third grade teacher’s wake. It was horrifying, in its own special way. So many people
crammed into a rented house, talking and having reunions all the while waiting in line to pay respects to the corpse of a
woman who would never smile again. She made the lives of those around her brighter, changed every life she touched,
and now that thread was cut. A lifeless body sat inside a coffin, and to mourn it we waited in an eternal line, inside a house
rented from men whose business is to organize mourning, all to see the shape of someone who no longer existed. It was
scary to me. It was deeply, deeply scary, and it made me truly sad. Not depressed, sad. I’ve said before that to understand
the full humanity of someone else is a terrifying thing, to really consider that every person you meet for just a moment has a
life just as full and complex as yours, it’s a scary thought. It makes you feel small, helpless, and kind of alone. But it’s worse,
so much worse, to understand where that web ended. When someone’s life has run its course, and now you can never
reach out and touch them again. That life, once vibrant and beautiful, it’s over.
What do I turn to in times of sorrow? Simon and Garfunkel, mostly. It’s wonderful, what Paul Simon has created. He
looks for meaning in a place that seems empty, and looks for meaning in a place that seems empty, and looks for meaning
in a place that seems empty. He finds nothing, but still he looks. He loses friends, but still he looks. It’s a universal thing that
he managed to capture. It’s not surprising why, I suppose. He was a man who had love, and lost it. He was a man who
had stardom, and felt all it did was empty his art of meaning. He was a man with companionship, and then he lost it. Why
should I be surprised he looked for meaning so long? Why should I be surprised he found something so beautiful along the
way? He never stopped that search, not ever. He got closer to it, got happier, got older, learned more, became a more
complete man, but he’s still looking. All the way up to Stranger to Stranger, and long after, he’ll still be looking. He’s looking
for America, driving down to Graceland, and trading his tears for proof of love.
Music is the shorthand of emotion, I suppose.
ECHOES 47
NONFICTION
THE KALLIE comfortable in the kitchen while I scamper upstairs to survey
the crime scene. My bedroom door is open. My window is
open. My window screen is lying on the porch roof.
KHRONICHLES “How did she get out?” I lean out the window, retrieve the
screen, and set it back as best I can in its place. The screen
Liesl Ament doesn’t fit perfectly—years ago I often popped it off to read
on the roof. Drat. Who would’ve thought that my sixth grade
reading habits would come back to bite me?
“Liesl! Liesl!” The pitter-patter of my Sebastian’s frantic foot- Sebastian appears next to me, and I repeat my question.
steps snap me out of my Sunday morning haze.
“I opened the window for a moment, and then I left,” Sebas-
A foreboding unease tugs at my chest. Torn between yelling tian explains. “When I got back she was on the roof!”
and whispering, I half-shout: “What?”
My eyes narrow. “You opened the window? After I explicitly
Sebastian bounds down the basement steps. “Kallie’s gone!” told you not to?” Picture Saturday afternoon: I’m wearing my
Oh. My. Gosh. hand stitched Homecoming dress, my brother sits on my bed,
Kallie beside him, I list out the Dos and Don’ts of watching the
cat. “Leave her unattended by an open window” topped the
My feet hit the cement ground as I hop off the pullout couch list of Don’ts.
on which I had spent the night. Still on the bed is Sophie, who
slept over after Homecoming. Sebastian’s panic woke her as We return downstairs. Sophie pulls out a mixing bowl and
well. measured cups of Bisquick and milk. After all, there’s no point
“What happened?” I ask. I must be dreaming. searching on an empty stomach.
While I text my close friends about the morning’s tragic events,
We hurry up the stairs. “She pushed the screen of your window Mom calls me.
off and jumped onto the roof.”
“Is it true?” she presses. “Theodore told me Kallie escaped.”
“The roof?” I yelp. On the ground floor, the front door is open;
the morning sky is a cheerful blue. “Yeah, she’s gone.”
“Theodore went to look for her,” Sebastian says. “He’s down Mom sighs. “This is so embarrassing.”
the street.”
Well she isn’t wrong. Losing a cat the day after you adopt her?
How did this happen? I wonder. She was fine when I checked That’s pretty embarrassing. “Yeah.”
on her after I got home.
Sophie joins us in the kitchen. “What’s going on?” “You need to go out and look for her,” Mom says. “So do the
boys. Maybe Sophie can help.”
“Our cat got out.” I glance at Sophie, who dumps the batter onto an oven tray.
“Alright.”
Sophie is unfazed by the news I have a cat. She makes herself
48 ECHOES
NONFICTION
After a breakfast of Sophie’s delicious biscuits, we walk to BACKGROUND NOISE 2
Safeway. I buy several catnip treats, and we return home,
jamming to Spotify all the while. Cecilia Funk
Theodore spots Kallie in the neighbor’s yard. we hurry over
to catch her. My brothers boldly trespass. I hesitantly follow.
We locate her two houses down, two luminous eyes shining
beneath the neighbors’ patio. My brothers crouch on one side
of the patio; Sophie and I flank the opposite side. The rest of
the yard is teeming with plant life. If we spook Kallie, she could
disappear into a cluster of thick bushes.
What follows is a stake out.
“I feel like I’m in Vietnam,” I whisper to Sophie. She snickers
softly, catching the reference to our AP Lit unit.
After a half hour of watching Kallie, I go back to my house for
reinforcements. Using a stick and string from my sisters’ brace-
let kit, I construct a fishing pole, and the Safeway brand catnip
is the bait. I bring the cat carrier too. Sophie takes the pole
and gingerly casts it under the patio. Kallie’s attention catches.
Hope surges, and I carefully adjust the cat carrier so Kallie
can crawl in.
...
Kallie doesn’t come home on Sunday.
In the evening I set Kallie’s litter box and carrier in the yard.
She could recognize the scent and return home. Later, in the
dark of my bedroom, I cry.
On Tuesday, several things happen. I fail my driver’s test by
“I’m such a failure,” I whisper. “I couldn’t take care of a cat for virtue of the brake light doesn’t work, so I can’t actually take
one day.” I dissolve into hiccuped sobs. the test. I drop off birthday presents for a friend, one of the only
things that makes my crummy week a tiny bit better. Then my
Kallie doesn’t come home on Monday. mom cooks salmon and broccoli for dinner. I hate salmon and
broccoli.
What-ifs plague my thoughts. What if I hadn’t asked my broth-
er to watch Kallie while I went to Homecoming? What if I had After dinner, we are clearing our plates when Theodore points
just stayed home? What if I hadn’t gotten ice cream after the at the screen door.
dance? What if I had woken up earlier on Sunday? What if,
what if, what if. “Kallie!” he shrieks.
ECHOES 49
NONFICTION
“Get her food!” Mom hollers. For a few more minutes, I follow Kallie around. Eventually I
scoop her up in my arms. Kallie squirms, but I hold her tight.
I dump a can of cat food into a bowl and set it on the mat in
front of the door. Mom opens the door and Kallie darts into “Oh you poor girl.” My voice is high pitched, like I’m talking
the shadows. to a newborn. “You are so brave, you know that? You are so
brave.”
“Everybody leave except Liesl,” Mom orders. My siblings
cluster on the opposite side of the floor, out of sight. We settle down on the couch. Kallie sits sullenly while I snap
selfies with her. Mom and my siblings come down to see her.
“I’m going outside,” Theodore says. He leaves through the
front door. “She’s home,” Mom says, nearly teary-eyed. “She came
` home.”
Kalle reappears in the doorway. Cautiously, she places one
paw on the mat, then fully stands on it. She nibbles the tuna in “Yeah yeah.” I stroke the back of Kallie’s head. “Can you put
the bowl. that on her?” I motion to the collar on the table beside me.
Mom picks up the collar, pink, flower, and Safeway-brand,
Theodore sneaks up behind her and slides the screen door and snaps it closed around Kallie’s neck.
shut. Kallie jumps.
“If she gets out again at least people will know she’s not a
“She’s inside!” I yell. stray,” Sebastian points out.
Veronica and Josephine, my sisters, are screaming. Sebastian After everyone has calmed down, I retreat to my room, bring-
is screaming. Mom is screaming. ing Kallie with me. I set her down on my bed. She curls up.
“Come upstairs. We can’t overwhelm Kallie!” My mom drags “Kalamari.” I use her full name. Kallie, being a cat, does not
my brothers and sisters to the second story. know the difference. She ignores me either way.
On the ground floor, it’s me vs. Kallie. Her timidness makes her “You’re so brave,” I repeat softly.
tiny. I shut all the doors on the floor—one to the basement and
two to the mudroom—so Kallie can’t leave my sight. She’s asleep now. I scroll through Snapchat and say a prayer,
thankful to have Kallie home at last.
“Hi girl,” I coo, crouching slightly as I approach. Kallie darts Of course, I lost her again the next day, but that’s a story for
into the kitchen. My strides are leisurely as I follow her; there’s another time.
no reason to run after her.
“Baby!” Kallie runs into the family room.
“Where is she?” Mom anxiously inquires from the top of the
steps.
“Just ran back to the door,” I reply, watching Kallie scamper
out of the family room. She mewls at the screen door, lament-
ing her captivity.
50 ECHOES