THE NEW ME (9)

THN

EE
W
ME

9.55 am, the clock was ticking so loud. Tick-
tock, tick-tock was all I could hear at that
moment. Anxiously waiting in front of my
computer to check my results. My mom
and dad were just beside me with
enthusiastic feelings.



The clock hit 10.00 am ! I typed in my “Angka
Giliran”. The noise as I tap on my keys was soft and

powerfully subtle. As my fingertips pressed with
ease, my fingers began to mutter the latter as I press

the enter key. I saw the results.The only emotion
that I could feel at that time was disappointment. I
could hear how my parents sighed when they saw
my result. They were dissatisfied with them. It was
not the result I expected. It was terribly a bad result.

I felt a range of emotions including worry,
fear, sadness, guilt, and even feelings of
being left out. I could not take it that I did
badly. Thinking back, I felt like I was not
giving my 100%. During classes, I was not
paying attention. I guessed I gaslighted
myself all this time thinking I did my level
best while preparing for exams. Never had
the urge to ask my teacher questions about
things I do not understand. Always
daydreaming in class. I just could not help
but blame myself because I was the one who
responsible for my results.

Ah! Another thing that probably triggered my results was my addiction to
games. I played video games persistently and often obsessively, to the point
where playing the games took precedence over my other activities such as
revising and doing activities regarding studies.

I defined video games are like a
drug. I played them, and they
were fun, and I wanted more
and more. And once I started to
lose control, it was hard to stop.
So that was how the addiction
never stopped. Sometimes I

kept playing until dawn
without even realizing I had

school to attend.

I sat and started to ruminate about the days I got influenced by some
negative friends. As and old saying false friends are worse than open
enemies. I guessed that is true.

With those fake friends, I mostly spent my days in
school in a bad way. Skipped classes which
affected my academic performance. In general,
these bad-friends influence affected my general
well being. Some of them even taught me how to
smoke. Smoking was never my thing before this. I
got addicted afterwards. Tried vaping too. My
parents warned me but I never cared because
friendship was all I cherish back then. I even snuck
out of my house during weekends to hang out with
them. Only if I tried to go back to the times and
told myself to study everything could be better
now. I regretted it a lot.

I was ashamed. I felt hesitant to
approach my teacher as I entered my
school to get my printed results. What
surprised me was, my friends were up
on stage receiving their straight A
results. I could feel their emotions from
down. I bet they felt pleased with their
result. An emotion I failed to feel.
Envied them. They shone bright like a
diamond up on the stage while me at
down looking like loser. At that point in
my life, I felt like a failure. In one
phrase I just screwed up everything.

16 June was considered my black day. As the days passed by,
I enrolled myself on STPM, the only choice that was

available for my results. Unsure about the pathway-decided
to step in. Promised myself to change. A change in my

personality would make my determination a success. Like
an old saying where there is a will, there is a way. Strongly
believed myself to achieve it. Proved to everyone that I am

worthy enough. Invested myself in. I threw away all the
negative thoughts and never felt guilty for starting my life

again as a hardworking student.



I aimed for perfection as I discovered it was
a moving target. So I set my target which
was a 4.00 GPA. To achieve that, I tried to
make my tasks realistic and manageable. I
never made a fuss of unnecessary matters.

Prioritised my task, stayed focused and planned
my day so that it would be easier for me to
complete my daily task. Managed my time in the
quality way possible. Time management was
extremely important for getting smooth and
fabulous output. I always made a timetable to get
these tasks completed. By doing these tasks on
time, I would be able to produce the best quality
work.

It was important to have a homework routine as well. The routine
would help me to know what to expect at the end of the day, and it
would give me time to digest what I had learnt.

To hit the books, I did all the homework given by
my teacher. Homework created a responsibility
for me to complete it without much external help.
It also helped me to improve my attitude towards
school and self-discipline. This as well helped me
to improve my memory when putting effort to get
it done. Burnt the midnight oil to study. Other
than homework, timely revision helped me
reduce the anxiety and stress levels likely to
have during exams. It also made me well-
prepared for the examinations. It complemented
my efforts of studying and helped me gauge my
strengths and knowledge in a particular subject.

Extracurriculars are a critical part of a university
application. So I joined as many curricular activities.
Participating in activities I was passionate about
increased my brain function, and helped me concentrate
and manage my time better, all of which contributed to
my higher grades during my first mock exam. A result I
had never forecast about. Was on cloud nine.

Had a chance to become a prefect so I took it
as an advantage to get more skills improved.
When I was in the first year, I simply gave them deadly
looks with stern expressions, which were returned
with the same response! They would not even care
if you had not done your job well. Thanks to my seniors, I
later learnt the alternate way of persuading them, which is
‘pujuk-pujuk’. Instead of going mad at them, I tried
starting a conversation with them.

Tried to become a good role model and yet became a good role
model because I scored a 4.00 GPA for 2 consecutive semesters.
My teachers kept praising me every time. They said I am a salt of
the earth. I was delighted to hear that, and because of this, I had
attracted a lot of good friends. The friends who, from time to
time, speak plainly and from a trustworthy affection. They always
spend quality time with me than wasting those time. All of them a
trerustworthy, loyal and honest. Encourage one another and
respect each other’s boundaries. Always seek the good in others
and be respectful in interactions. They are really good.



My old friends are probably defeated by my
success. They called me a few times to go out
with them for some bad things but I avoided
them. True friends are like diamonds, precious
but rare, false friends are like autumn leaves,
found everywhere. The false friends are them.

They got good results during SPM so they
shone up on the stage, but now I become the
one who shinning on stage like a diamond
with my other good friends.

Time flies like an arrow. Semester 3 was forthcoming. I put my
level best into preparing for the exam to ace a test. Wrote the exam
with full assurance knowing I worked my fingers to the bone.
Completed all 4 papers. The results day is now closing by...

THE END..

AUTHOR:

Agatha Ngee
Trisharaney
Danish Zaki
Roshan Kumar Nair




ILLUSTRATOR:

Aisyah Iman

"The only thing standing between you and
outrageous success is continuous progress." —

Dan Waldschmidt, business strategist