Come OUT St. Pete | 2018 Digital Guide

“True Colors”
by artist Nick Ribera

2nd annual

Come out st. pete event guide

October 4 - 11, 2018

Grand Central District & Surrounding Areas | ComeOUTStPete.org

(1600-3100 Central Avenue, St. Pete)
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Come OUT Mission

COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET AND INTO THE WORLD!
Come OUT St. Pete’s mission is to inspire the LGBTQ+ community to live genuinely, raise
awareness of LGBTQ+ issues and encourage public support from LGBTQ+ allies. Equality is
at the forefront of all COSP initiatives and events, specifically with regard to sexual orientation
and gender identity.

This marks our second year of celebration, yet the first as our own entity and non-profit organization.

IOlonofUnhlTgoovarnenaoidarnnoobdffofwSuicanifiailntalyltgy!PwjAeoitlillenoirnnusgsbsp,uwiwrrigteeh’suptwnrhedoeseneGrdn-restaurnofpuudprlCloyirentncaeotudrlogairunlfrPduairlvloLCiudGoduBmaFTleesQsO+ttUoicvTfoaimnlS,dtmi.t“PufiasenmtoietuiyPlr,yaah”rnoaadpmdeteohtfnhoegsaasetttutwerhahiinscoghdhaeoamfvcuieotsyny,sebattlnrotadcotkpico-ronomvee
diversity should not be feared, but celebrated.

On behalf of an hwaloelp-lvceooymluoenutyeeoneurjotbyooyacoorudmroesfeOdlfUiraTetcaotnuodrrscy,eevlaearbr-riroaoutuesnypdolaeunvrenPninRtsgIDacEnomd, idnmudiritvtineideguso,aualirntydm, nainuintmefreessretociuvtsiiotiinneadsliitvthyiid,suaanld
volunteers, we
inclusivity. We
week: October 4th through 11th, 2018.

Proudly,

Jimmy Biascan & Mandy Keyes Board of Directors
Co-Chairs of the Come OUT St. Pete

Board Members

Jimmy Biascan | Co-Chair Court Bishop | Board Member Brian Longstreth | Board Member
Mandy Keyes | Co-Chair Jim Woodfield | Board Member Terry Thompson | Board Member
Shawn Connelly | Secretary Sheryl Hoolsema | Board Member
Joshua Wallace | Treasurer Chris Jones | Board Member

COME OUT ST PETE EVENT GUIDE

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Dear Friends,
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OaLdneGuddrBiwccTiaetQtylicoiocnsomwtmoinemmlgluaCknknoiiotnmywg.enMthOfiyosUrsfTibinrescSitentCr.gePoitnemhtcaeelnuiOksssiUvateoTwatoSnhndetd. eaePvcrefcetuenelptaetoixnsrpgugraceoncsfieszsaieoslr.lnswoahfnodoulsiruvpsehp, aowrreotedrrkss,ufaponprdothrptelafiroyrthiomeureer,and
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the

Thank you again, and welcome!

Sincerely,

COME OUT ST PETE EVENT GUIDE

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COME OUT ST PETE EVENT GUIDE

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Photo credit Come OUT St. Pete and the Grand Central District
Watermark would like to recognize the contributions of three
OUT and proud St. Petersburg City Council members
Darden Rice, Amy Elizabeth Foster, and Steve Kornell. 

“ 
Visibility saves lives and

makes safer communities. The

progress of equality for the

LGBTQ+ community is linked

to providing a community

where it is safe to live

”genuinely and safely.

- Darden Rice

History of

National Come OUT Day

National Come Out Day was founded in 1988 by Robert O’Leary, did not want to respond defensively to anti-LGBT
Eichberg and Jean O’Leary. Eichberg, who died in 1995 action because they believed it would be predictable. This
of complications from AIDS, was a psychologist from New caused them to found NCOD in order to maintain positiv-
Mexico and founder of the personal growth workshop, ity and celebrate coming out. The date of October 11 was
The Experience. O’Leary was an openly lesbian political chosen because it is the anniversary of the 1987 National
leader and long-time activist from New York, and was at March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights.
the time the head of the National Gay Rights Advocates (source: Wikipedia)
in Los Angeles. LGBT activists, including Eichberg and

“Most people think they don’t know anyone gay or lesbian, and in fact everybody does.
It is imperative that we come out and let people know who we are
and disabuse them of their fears and stereotypes.”

– Robert Eichberg, 1993

COME OUT ST PETE EVENT GUIDE

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Event schedule

OCT 4Thursday TASTE OF GRAND CENTRAL | 6 - 10 PM
Grand Central District, St. Petersburg

OCT 5Friday COME OUT, STAY OUT LGBT SENIOR
RESOURCE FAIR | 9 AM - 12:30 PM
Sunshine Senior Center, St. Petersburg
LGBTQ+ SENIORS VS. YOUTH BOWLING CONTEST
| 6 - 8 PM Ten Pin Lanes, South Pasadena
CROISEURS DELLA NOCHE (CRUISERS OF THE NIGHT)
FASHION SHOW | 7 - 9 PM VFW Post 39, St. Petersburg
WEEKEND LAUNCH PARTY | 9 PM - 3 AM
G St. Pete Nightclub, St. Petersburg

OCT 6Saturday COME OUT ST PETE PARADE | 10 AM - NOON
Grand Central Gayborhood, St. Petersburg (see page 8 for route)

GRAND CENTRAL PROUD FESTIVAL | NOON - 6 PM

Grand Central District, St. Petersburg (see page 8 for street guide)

See page 8 & 9 for the parade route, market map and local entertainment guide

METRO LGBTQ+ WELCOME CENTER
OPEN HOUSE | 10 AM - 9 PM

LGBTQ+ Welcome Center, St. Petersburg

MAYOR RICK KRISEMAN PRESENTATION | 1 - 2 PM

LGBTQ+ Welcome Center, St. Petersburg

THE FLORIDA ORCHESTRA - BERSTEIN’S BROADWAY |

2 - 4 PM and 8 - 10 PM events continued >>

Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg

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October 4–11, 2O18

OCT 6Saturday OFFICIAL AFTER PARTY AT ENIGMA | 9 PM - 2 AM
Enigma Bar & Lounge, St. Petersburg

OCT 7Sunday OVER THE RAINBOW GRAND CENTRAL

CHALLENGE | 11 AM - 3 PM

Grand Central District, St. Petersburg

COME OUT ST PETE BEACH DAY | 11 AM - 5 PM

Pass-A-Grille, St. Pete Beach - in front of the Hurricane Restaurant

SUNSET ROOFTOP TEA BY THE SEA PARTY

| 5 PM - 9 PM

Hurricane Seafood Restaurant, St. Pete Beach

Thursday NATIONAL COME OUT DAY PROCLAMATION
| 3 PM
OCT. 11
City of St. Petersburg City Hall, St. Petersburg

DEB HUNSEDER PERFORMING LIVE | 6 - 9 PM

Punky’s Bar & Grill, St. Petersburg

For more information, visit comeoutstpete.org

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SATURDAY, OCTOBER 6TH • 10 AM - NOON

Parade Route & Festival Map

31st Street
3oth Street
29th Street
28th Street
27th Street
26th Street
25th Street
24th Street
23rd Street
22nd Street
21st Street
20th Street
19th Street
18th Street
17th Street
16th Street
275

FINISH 1st Ave. North 1st Ave. North 1st Ave. North START 1st Ave. North
Central Ave. Parade Route
Central Ave. Parade Route Central Ave. Festival Central Ave. Parade Line-Up
Central Ave. Festival

31st Street
3oth Street
29th Street
28th Street
27th Street
26th Street
25th Street
24th Street
23rd Street
22nd Street
21st Street
20th Street
19th Street
18th Street
17th Street
16th Street

1st Ave. South 1st Ave. South 1st Ave. South 1st Ave. South

The parade will begin at 20th Street and head west on Central Avenue

Celebrate with us along the parade route

Join hundreds of your friends
Saturday, October 6th from 10 AM – NOON

• Help unfurl a block-long rainbow flag and carry it along
the parade route in the Grand Central District.

Walk or ride • The parade will be followed by the Grand Central
in the parade! Proud Festival (on Central Avenue between 22nd St.
and 31st St. N.). Shop from the largest collection of
LGBTQ+ owned businesses in the country. Dozens of
vendors and locally owned businesses and artists will line
the sidewalks.

Parade entries and vendor pricing • Make it a Family Fun Day. Bring the kids or your
pets and enjoy the day.
start at just $25 • Free parking on Central Ave. after the parade.
• Many businesses in the district will be providing live
Visit: entertainment and special performances
during and after the parade and market. Here are a few!
comeoutstpete.org
SEE PAGE 9
to register by 10/2/18 deadline

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IN THE GRAND CENTRAL DISTRICT

1600 – 3100 Blocks of Central Avenue, St. Pete
ComeOUTStPete.org

Local Entertainment Guide
31st Street
3oth Street
29th Street
28th Street
27th Street
26th Street
25th Street
24th Street
23rd Street
22nd Street

1st Ave. North 1st Ave. North 1s
C
10 8 7 5 43
6
Central Ave. Central Ave.

9 21
31st Street
3oth Street
29th Street
28th Street
27th Street
26th Street
25th Street
24th Street
23rd Street
22nd Street

1st Ave. South 1st Ave. South 1s

Come OUT and party all day long!

1 RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER | DJ McDrama • 1 PM – 4 PM
2244 Central Ave

2 THE DOG BAR | DJ Shannon C • 10 AM - 1 PM | Mixed Signal • 1 PM – 4 PM

2300 Central Ave

3 OLD KEY WEST BAR & GRILL | All you can eat breakfast bar $9.99 • 9 AM - 1 PM
2451 Central Ave
| Foam Party

4 THE QUEENS HEAD | DJ and live music • 11 AM – 5 PM
2501 Central Ave featuring Brittany Brown and Jennifer Real

5 URBAN COMFORT | Live music
2601 Central Ave

6 NUMEX | Tommy Simms • 11:30 AM – 4 PM | Food Specials
2710 Central Ave

7 THE GARAGE | DJ Bill Kody
2729 Central Ave

STEEP STATION 8 STEEP STATION | DJ DrSKoot and water party

9 2901 Central Ave

POM POM’S TEAHOUSE | Lady Darjuxena and her Witch Choreo Coven • NOON

2950 Central Ave

10 PUNKY’S BAR & GRILL | Open at 9 AM • Boys Entrance Live • 3 PM – 7 PM

3063 Central Ave
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COMING OUT STORY

RICHARD

Out at Age 78

In and after high that I was a 42-year-old virgin. He said if I wanted to do
school, I dated girls. something about that to give him a call. And I did.
At about age 20,
I entered a strict Later, I met and married an amazing woman, and after
religious community more than 20 years of marriage, we decided to separate,
and took vows of poverty, chastity and obedience. and later divorced. When the horrible massacre of 49
gay young people at the Pulse Nightclub in Orlando
During those years, I had doubts about my sexuality, but happened, I finally admitted to myself that I am gay, and
honored the vows. After leaving the community, a man came out to my former spouse and the world.
whom I knew asked me if I was gay, and I responded

COMING OUT STORY

CONFUSED BI was straight, but she didn’t know yet. I waited a second.
She seemed nice enough for me to be able to tell her.
Coming Out to My Crush “I’m bi,” I said to her after hesitation. She was so sup-
portive, but I just couldn’t find the courage to tell her I
Ever since I was young, I always pictured myself with liked her.
boys. You could say I was as straight as a line. But one
day in 6th grade, I was in line with my best friend. She I moved on with my life and even started to like a boy.
was so sweet and nice and was just an all-around good I wondered if it was just a phase. Nope! That summer,
person. That’s when I realized something that even sur- when I hung out with her, the same butterflies hit my
prised me. tummy. To this day I still like her, but am totally scared to
tell her. I’m also totally scared to tell my parents (hard-
I totally got butterflies when I was around her and I core Christians). I don’t even know what to tell my grand-
thought she was the most beautiful person I had ever ma because every time we see a gay couple, she turns
seen. I stared at her as she talked to me. I’m pretty sure to me and sticks her tongue out.
I had my mouth open. When we went to lunch one day,
we sat down at our usual spot together. “Happy Pride It felt nice to come out, but I’m not sure how to tell my
month,” she randomly said (it was around June 3rd). parents. Please help.
Mind you, I discovered I was bi a few months back. Did I
make it that obvious that I liked her or something?

Stupidly, I asked her if she was gay, bi, etc. She said she

COME OUT ST PETE EVENT GUIDE

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#SunsOutBunsOut

• Clothing Optional
• Affordable
• Relaxing & Laid Back
• Heat Pool & Hot Tub

Pet Friendly

GayStPete House, since 2008
4505 5th Avenue N, St Petersburg
727-365-0544 gaystpetehouse.com

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Wrap. Test. Repeat.

IfYouSex.org

a member of

13

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Come Out
and Come In.

Weekend Breakfast Buffet 9am –1pm
Drink specials all day Saturday & Sunday!

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Miss Come Out St. Pete Debuts in 2018

turned in to a wonderful event, hosted by Daphne
Ferraro and Ed Gonzalez at Enigma. Contestants
were judged on Evening Gown, Presentation,
and Talent. In an extremely close contest, crowd
participation narrowed it down too three, and the
judges awarded Ashlee T. Bangkx the winner.

On September 2nd, the very first Miss Come OUT Ashlee, aka Ian Gavin, has been performing drag
St Pete was crowned after five contestants vied for for over 10 years, and moved to St. Petersburg with
the title at Enigma Lounge. A casual idea quickly his husband Jeremy Cureton from Fort Myers four
years ago. Ashlee T. Bangkx will be representing
in the inaugural Come OUT St. Pete Parade on
October 6th, as well as other community events
throughout the year.

COMING OUT STORY

MANDY KEYES

When I came out as bi, my
best friend said “yeah I know.”
It took a little longer for real
acceptance from my dad,
and we continued to have
arguments about political
leanings and how they affect
my life and future potential marriage. One such blow up
ended in an apology that went, “I guess I accepted, I
just never truly understood.” As well as, “are you SURE
you’ll never date a man again?” I replied that I was very
sure... then I met Jason two months later and had to
come out in reverse! We’ve been together for over 6
years. I guess love is love, no matter which way.

COME OUT ST PETE EVENT GUIDE

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TASTE OF
THURSDAY, OCTOBER 4 @ 6:00 PM

PARTICIPATING RESTAURANTS

Supporting our Punky’s Bar and Grill 6 PM - 6:45 PM
communities Corkscrew shrimp with Thai sauce & Punky’s Pucker cocktail

for over 13 years! Pom Pom’s Teahouse 6:50 PM - 7:35 PM
Yellow chicken curry wrap with fresh vegetables, toasted
almonds and cilantro vinaigrette & Teamosa

URBAN Comfort 7:45 PM - 8:30 PM
Fried mac and cheese balls & Lazy Leash

The Queens Head 8:35 PM - 9:20 PM
Seared sea scallop with cauliflower mash and roasted
brussels sprouts & Queen’s Cucumber Rickey

Community Cafe 9:25 PM - 10:10 PM
Assorted pastries, brownies and cupcakes & Jenkins Juice

Tickets are limited.

Get your tickets before they are sold out!

$50 PER PERSON
To purchase tickets, visit bit.ly/taste-gcda

RSVP on Facebook @ bit.ly/cosp-taste
Includes a small plate & cocktail at each stop. Additional drinks available for purchase.

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HISTORY OF THE GRAND CENTRAL Grand Central as it is now home to the ever
increasing building murals that have become
DISTRICT ASSOCIATION part of the St. Petersburg culture. The district is
pedestrian and bicycle friendly, as well a having
The Grand Central District is a designated and electric vehicle chargers. When bike share
accredited Main Street by the National Trust for platforms arrived in St. Petersburg, Grand Central
Historic Preservation and a member of Florida was among the first to have them installed.
Main Street. Grand Central is the longest tenured Grand Central is easily accessible through the
Main Street district in St. Petersburg as its 20th City’s public transportation system.
year is on the horizon. After suffering a drastic
economic decline in the 1980s, the Grand Central One of the primary directives of the Main
District has become a thriving community full Street program is economic revitalization and
of interesting shops, arts and craft studios, repurposing of existing structures, and Grand
professional and personal services, health and Central has taken this concept to another
wellness providers, local breweries and a variety level. The district was once dotted with gas
of restaurants and bars. stations and auto repair shops end to end.
Those facilities have been reborn as taco stands,
Grand Central is bordered by the two distinct eclectic restaurants and coffee shops. Long time
and unique neighborhoods of Palmetto Park businesses have also seen great improvement,
and Historic Kenwood, whose residents support and are benefiting from the efforts by Grand
collaboration on artistic endeavors and issues Central.
concerning the business corridor. Grand Central
has also provided a safe space for the LGBTQ+ As the city continues to reinvent itself, Grand
community for over two decades and was Central will provide a home, an entrepreneurial
instrumental in creating one of the largest enclave, and creative space for interesting peo-
celebrations of the LGBTQ+ community in the ple with imaginative ideas and dreams. A famous
southeast United States. With more than 80 selection from the American songbook told the
LGBTQ+ owned and/or managed companies in story of the place beyond the rainbow, Grand
the District, the area harbors one of the highest Central’s efforts in the future will aspire to en-
concentrations of such businesses in the country. deavor. Whether you want to come for an hour or
for a day, the Grand Central District has some-
St. Petersburg was designated City of the Arts thing for you.
following the Great Recession. Art studios and
galleries are visible throughout the entire area. grandcentraldistrict.org
The arts community is woven into the fabric of

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COMING OUT STORY

ROBERT SHAFFER aka Pinky Penmark

Counting Christmases my sexuality, at the time, and merely announced during
a family dinner one Friday night that I was counting
I came of age and came out of Christmases. My mother’s first reaction is going to seem
the closet during the “Decade cold to you, maybe even crass and self-centered but don’t
of Decadence.” Yes, the 1980s: dwell on it. Her response was fairly typical for near the
cocaine, credit cards, bathhouses, end of the 80s when, admit it out loud or not, most of us
designer jeans, Reagan, the gay were more focused directly on ourselves and if and how
cancer, the Gay Men’s Health Crisis, we would survive until the cavalry (the 1990s) arrived than
Act Up, fear, persecution, death and we were on anything else. So, she turned to my father
more death followed by more death, some more fear and and said, rather indignantly and with more than a little
countless funerals that added up so quickly that most of disgust, “I told you this was going to happen.”
the gay men I knew felt guilty to be alive. By 1988, we were
so paralyzed by fear and guilt and numbed by cocaine And that was it. That was the extent of the discussion,
and alcohol that it took us some years to realize that our mostly. We went back to acting like we were a family that
communities, our country, our government, our president was above having any kinds of problems and pretended
and in many cases even our families had abandoned us that it wasn’t happening.
because they assumed we would be dead soon anyway.
By the end of the decade more of the gay men I knew The 1990s arrived with many a years’ long haze and the
were counting Christmases than were not. family churned on. The people I knew were continuing to
die and I was just waiting to; but before I knew it, 1997 rolled
“Counting Christmases” was a phrase my friends and I around and something in my body – that no one could
would use to differentiate between the people we knew explain – had kept me alive until breakthrough medicines
that had the gay cancer and those of us that were merely were discovered and dispensed. The medicines offered
waiting to get it. You see, from what we observed, from those of us with HIV/AIDS a new beginning and many
the time in between when someone became sick from HIV more Christmases.
to the time they died you could count two Christmases.
It was very late in the decade when I got the news Those of us who navigated this 15 years in history the best
that I had two Christmases left. I was in the middle of we knew how at the time were extremely lucky, but there
graduating from college, trying to make decisions about was a cost to us, a loss, what feels like a great amount of
what I wanted to do with my life and trying to first find wasted time. Every generation will indeed have its plight,
and then explore every back-alley gay club I heard about but I encourage the young people of today to find a way
when I had to break the news to my family that I was to embrace the fact that they are living in the best time in
“counting Christmases” too. I thought to myself, “I don’t history to be exactly who they are openly and as early as
have time for this!” Just locating the gay clubs was a full- they become comfortable in their skin. I encourage you
time job because none of them had signs in front of them. to take full advantage of this: stand up, be exactly who
Randomly figuring out which unmarked, dusty, back-alley, you are and who you want to be, come out to the world
inner-city door had a fabulous Gay Emerald City behind it because even though the current world is not without its
was no easy task and now I only had two years left to find problems, I promise you that there will be, what feels like,
every one of them in the world. a huge coming out party awaiting you and that you will
feel exponentially more alive when you live your authentic
So my coming out story never really truly happened. I am life out of the darkness and in the light where the world
sure there were enough screaming clues and screaming can see exactly how beautiful you are.
queens around me that my parents had to suspect I
was gay anyway, so I skipped talking with them about

COME OUT ST PETE EVENT GUIDE

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Punky’s Bar & Grill

3063 Central Ave, St Petersburg
727-201-4712 Punkysbar.com

Located In the Grand Central District

Wednesday October 3rd Monday October 8th
Bingo4Charity Magic Open Mic

w/ Victoria Michaels w/ Delaran 7-10pm
Come OUT St Pete 7-10pm Tuesday October 9th
Best Damn Karaoke
Thursday October 4th w/ KJ Duane Cook 7-10pm
Taste of Grand Central Wednesday October 10th

Jennifer Real Bingo4Charity
Performing Live 7-9pm w/ Victoria Michaels
Red Ribbon Cyclists 7-10pm
Friday October 5th Thursday October 11th
DJ Bill Kody 6-10pm National Coming OUT Day
Saturday October 6th
Deb Hunseder
Open 9am! Performing Live!
Come OUT St Pete Parade
Grand Central Proud Market 6-9pm
Boys Entrance LIVE 3-7pm

Sunday October 7th
Sunday Brunch

Somewhere Over the
Rainbow Challenge

St Petersburg, Come for a
Visit, Stay for a Lifetime!

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COMING OUT STORY

JELLY they never did, they persisted, and they got much more
intense! I started having feelings for my best friend, and
Shards Of A Young Adult my schoolmate argued with me every single day to come
out to my parents. He was the child who had no issues
As a young boy growing up in a very conservative, very coming out to his parents, in fact they told him they knew
Baptist family, I was very aware of the stance my dad and and they loved him; I on the other hand, knew without a
brother had towards homosexuality. I knew from birth that reasonable doubt, that my dad would all but stone me to
God hated homosexuality, that it was an abomination, death in his living room.
that it was punishable by death – these feelings were
only supported by the gag-reflexes of my father and Come one early morning, the week of picking classes
brother at any mention of “gay” or gay individual they for college, I’m sitting on the couch talking with my dad
found in public. Among all the homophobic commotion about my future and the path he helped lay out for me,
grew a young boy who shared their hatred. There was when his phone rings. My dad owns his own business,
no way the oldest of two sons, the one with straight A’s so it was not uncommon for him to receive calls during
destined to be an architect, could be gay, right? all times of the day. I was used to conversations being
interrupted by his business calls. This call, however,
I got a job working in a health store at the age of 18. was different. My dad remained silent, and his onlooking
By that time, the feelings I was feeling only continued glare turned from interested to a complete disgust and
to grow. It was not much to think about when I was hatred I’ve never seen him express. And then he turned
younger, but as my hormones grew in tension, so did my to me to ask. “There is a guy on the phone. He says he
attraction; an attraction that my younger brother didn’t is in front of our house waiting for you and is threatening
feel, an attraction for other men. Confused, frustrated, to call the police on me. He said you are gay and he is
and all alone, I found myself curled up in a ball in the waiting to take you away.” The only guy I knew who I
corner of the health store where I worked, crying and would trust to help me had looked up my father’s number
praying that God would heal me, that I could be normal. and just outed me. In that moment, my life had ended.
I didn’t know what to do. The girlfriends I wooed never The heart of an innocent young adult who never got
lasted more than a week with me; women just didn’t into trouble, who did his best all his life, his life was now
excite me. I sought outside help from a schoolmate I over, left bare from the wrath of his father. I did the only
knew from high school. I didn’t know he was gay, but one thing I knew: I submitted, I told my schoolmate that it
day while surfing through the dating sites I used, I came was over, and to never call me again. My father, among
across his picture in the “men seeking men” category his slinging insults and slander to my fragile emotions,
and instantly recognized him. Communicating with him had taken a metaphorical hammer and bashed my heart
came as a surprise for both of us, as he had no idea into a thousand pieces. I was brought to therapy. I was
about my feelings toward men. I was desperate for help not allowed to partake in certain activities for fear of
and I hoped that my classmate could help me figure out sprouting further corruption in my life. I was to be cured
these feelings I wanted to get rid of so much. It was the by a strange man I’ve never met — a man who beat the
last straw for me; I tried everything. I tried going to the error of my ways into my head. He confused me more
gym, took testosterone-boosting supplements, dated
women, surrounded myself with very masculine guys, continued >>
all in an attempt to drown out my feelings, to smother
them before It was too late. Unfortunately to my dismay,

COME OUT ST PETE EVENT GUIDE

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<< continued from previous page

and worse, infused a fear in me that I still have issues man who beat the error of my ways into my head. He
with to this very day. confused me more and worse, infused a fear in me that
I still have issues with to this very day.
One year later, I managed to convince my dad to stop
my therapy, that my feelings were gone. However, three One year later, I managed to convince my dad to stop
months later, my brother discovered a secret in the form my therapy, that my feelings were gone. However, three
of my boyfriend, which was followed by an altercation. months later, my brother discovered a secret in the form
During the fight, I managed to call my best friend and of my boyfriend, which was followed by an altercation.
put my phone in my pocket. He listened to the whole During the fight, I managed to call my best friend and
commotion from the other line: the slander, the hate, the put my phone in my pocket. He listened to the whole
yelling and wall-banging of my father. “You are not my commotion from the other line: the slander, the hate, the
son, you are a demon, possessed. My son is dead. You yelling and wall-banging of my father. “You are not my
are disgusting. Get out, and give me your car keys! You son, you are a demon, possessed. My son is dead. You
can only take what you can hold, but I want you gone.” are disgusting. Get out, and give me your car keys! You
My dad was gone, my feelings were shattered, my mom can only take what you can hold, but I want you gone.”
was hysterical, she begged me to stay, begged me not to My dad was gone, my feelings were shattered, my mom
leave her alone with him and my brother. I needed out. It was hysterical, she begged me to stay, begged me not to
was over for me, my sanity was at its lowest. Meanwhile, leave her alone with him and my brother. I needed out. It
my best friend was waiting to pick me up in front of the was over for me, my sanity was at its lowest. Meanwhile,
house where he was currently arguing with my younger my best friend was waiting to pick me up in front of the
brother. I got in my friend’s car and we drove to his place house where he was currently arguing with my younger
so I’m able to get back on my feet with time. brother. I got in my friend’s car and we drove to his place
so I’m able to get back on my feet with time.
Since that experience, I’ve had no help adjusting to
my feelings, I’ve been watching videos on YouTube to Since that experience, I’ve had no help adjusting to
feel better about my choice to leave, but they’ve hardly my feelings, I’ve been watching videos on YouTube to
helped. One day, I opted to overdose and take my life, feel better about my choice to leave, but they’ve hardly
but failed. I was caught mid-act by my coworker and helped. One day, I opted to overdose and take my life,
forced to stop. Since then, I have been working to get but failed. I was caught mid-act by my coworker and
into my own place. I am still at odds with my dad and forced to stop. Since then, I have been working to get
brother, a situation that I fear will never change as long into my own place. I am still at odds with my dad and
as I live for fear of sprouting further corruption in my life. brother, a situation that I fear will never change as long
I was to be cured by a strange man I’ve never met – a as I live.

25

M y Regular MEDICATION
Pr escription ASSISTANCE
FOR JANE SMITH

As a client of METRO, when you fill a
prescription (including PrEP) at an onsite or
partner pharmacy, you’re providing quality
healthcare services to uninsured members of

our community, at no extra cost to you.

METRO/CAN onsite pharmacies are in our St. Pete and Clearwater
Health Center locations (Tampa coming soon). Partner pharmacies
include Tampa Family, Community Walgreens at 34th Street in St. Pete,
and AB Specialty in New Port Richey.

Learn More at MetroTampaBay.org/CoPayItForward

26

27

DEAR LGBTQIA+ KIDS

COURT BISHOP mative hometown and meet like-minded people. The

Hi. This is your ol’ Auntie Uncle most important part of this chapter in your life is pro-
Court, here. I’m 34 years old
and I identify as a lesbian. My tecting your heart. Whatever that means (as long as it’s
pronouns are she/her, but I’m
also comfortable with “they” if I legal and you’re not putting anyone in danger). Jelly, if it
were to hear someone refer to means staying with your friend for a while until you figure
me that way (as long as they
don’t have that scary, bigly big- out your next move, do it. And think about it – how awe-
oted tone in their voice – you know the one). I’m part of some is that? How awesome is it that you not only have
the team – both the Come OUT St. Pete Board of Direc-
tors and Media Garage Group – who has put this book a best friend, but a best friend who is willing to open his
together. Part of my job was to gather your stories. I’ve
read each of them multiple times and have tried to come heart and his home and be there for you unconditional-
up with a deep, thoughtful response to each of you. The ly? I do believe that coming out is a personal journey and
truth is, it’s not that easy.
no one should ever “out” anyone else, but I also believe

your friend has your best interest at heart. Let him be

there for you. You’re not alone. Do you hear me? I need
you to really let this sink in – all of you – YOU ARE NOT
ALONE.

As you know by now, life and experiences and relation- We can’t help who our families are. We can’t help who
ships (or non-relationships) and love and sadness and our friends’ families are. We have no control over the
all of those things, they’re messy. Even more so for beliefs and ideals that have been taught to those around
LGBTQIA+ people, people of color, women and any oth- us. We get no say in whether someone thinks poorly of
er “minority” group. And it sucks. us for being a “faggot.” Or doesn’t want to talk to the
“dyke.” Or calls us names because we’re trans or queer
Jelly, I have an upbringing not unlike yours. My parents or bi or blue or allergic to shellfish or only like to sing on
weren’t necessarily religious, but my extended family is Tuesdays or named Sam or generally just hates us for
deeply so. I’m an only child, so I didn’t have to feel the not being the version of ourselves that they want us to
pain of a sibling’s abandonment or “hatred,” as you say. be. It’s not up to them to decide who we are.
However, I’m practically an expert in being alone. I’m
also fluent in “wishing the gay away,” “feeling immense But there’s a light at the end of this seemingly endless
guilt for something I can’t control” and “trying everything tunnel. And that light is you. And your light will attract
in my power to be others’ version of ‘normal’.” I wanted your tribe. And that tribe will love you. That tribe will be
so badly for my father to love me, as you felt with your so down for you. That tribe will snatch wigs and sing on
dad, but knew that if he knew the real me, he would hate Tuesdays and destroy every shellfish in its path for you
me. I didn’t come out to my family until I was 23 years (on account of the allergies). But you have to believe.
old. After I did, my father didn’t speak to me for an entire You have to know in your heart that what you’re going
year. through is temporary.

When you’re a gay kid from a small town and/or a re- Jelly, Confused Bi and all the other LGBTQIA+ Kids
ligious upbringing, time is your enemy. Confused Bi, I out there who feel helpless or hopeless or ready to give
know you can relate to this too. You’re always waiting. up, please take a moment to read Robert’s (aka Pin-
Waiting to grow up. Waiting to find people who accept ky’s) story. It may put some things in perspective. Or
you as-is. Waiting to move away from your heteronor- read Richard’s story. Can you imagine hiding your true

continued >>

28

<< continued from previous page

self for nearly 80 years?! I don’t think I can even go 80
minutes without texting Jen, my wife of nearly four years,
how much I love her and how grateful I am for her love in
return.

And that’s what you have to live for. That’s what you have
to fight for. That’s what your future holds. Everything –
including life, itself – is temporary. Don’t waste it hating
yourself or being someone you’re not. Because one day,
with a little luck and a lot of persistence, you’ll have your
own Jen. And I can’t imagine a better future than that.

If you or someone you know is struggling with de-
pression, self-harm or suicidal thoughts, please reach
out using one or more of the resources we’ve listed
below. You are not alone.

LGBTQIA+ NATIONAL & LOCAL RESOURCES

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
24/7 free & confidential support for people in distress.
Prevention and crisis resources.
suicidepreventionlifeline.org | 1.800.273.8255

The Trevor Project
The leading national organization providing crisis intervention
and suicide prevention services to LGBTQIA+ youth.
TrevorLifeline available 24/7/265 at 1.866.488.7386
TrevorText: Text TREVOR to 1.202.304.1200

American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
Free crisis text line: Text TALK to 741-741 to text with a trained
crisis counselor
Veterans’ crisis line: Send a text to 838255
afsp.org

Metro Wellness
Comprehensive medical care, social activities, classes, support
groups, counseling, health & fitness programs, youth programs,
substance abuse programs, older adult programs, behavioral
health services and free HIV testing. Locations throughout
Tampa Bay.
metrotampabay.org | 727.321.3854

Empty Closets
Connect with people like you. Online forum for ages 13+.
Chat room for members who apply.
emptyclosets.com

Other wonderful resources
LGBT & Queer Voices | pride.com
The Community of LGBT Centers | lgbtcenters.org
Advocating for LGBTQ Equality | hrc.org

29

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Come Out St Pete.indd 1 30 9/12/18 10:41 AM

CULTURE. NEWS. EVENTS. MUSIC. FOOD AND DRINK.

31

Cash bar
Leader Gallery
Story-Telling
Movies
Guest speakers

ExperienceFAonoddmtrourcek!!s!
Thank you to our sponsorsKick-O

Thank you to all the volunteers for making these events happen.

You continue to prove the greater St. Petersburg535 Dr. Martin Luther King Jr St. N area is a wonderful place to live, work, play, and be OUT.
St. Petersburg, FL 33701
The 2nd Annual Come OUT St.Tuesday, October 2P4teh te Art Exhibit & Show winner is “True Colors” by artist Nick Ribera.

6:00 - 8:30 PM

Tickets ar$e30 Each Presented by:

If you are an OUTCOAST VIP member, S
you will receive an invite to the VIP
reception which includes a free gift
and open bar. To become a VIP
member, visit www.OUTCOAST.com.

Group Metro is prwoeullndestso&mcomarmkun2it5y cyeentaerrss of service
to the LGBTQ+ Community of Tampa Bay,

and it all started right here in St. Pete!

NOW PROVIDING:

Primary Care
Free HIV, HEP C Testing & Education
HIV Medical Case Management & Treatment
Behavioral Health Counseling
Trans Health Including HRT
Community Programing & Support for Youth,
Seniors, & Members of the Trans Community

health, wellness, & communyit

Mayo Mortgage Group Eric Wilson G St Pete/Honeypot
The Dog Bar Historic Kenwood Old Key West Bar & Grill
The Queens Head The Garage Lucky Star Lounge
Perfect Print Bob & Lynn Jeffrey Gay St. Pete House
Hurricane Seafood Restaurant
Woodfield Art Gallery Bradley Lotz
Rick Clarke Appraisal Services Urban Comfort Restaurant GayTaxGuy.com
Tech Data Community Cafe John Seibert
Pom Pom’s Teahouse

Friends of Come OUT St. Pete: Grant Savage; Triggermouth

Grand Central District & Surrounding Areas | ComeOUTStPete.org

(1600-3100 Central Avenue, St. Pete) 32