doc_2021-02-10_19-51-48.archivetempCricket 2020-09

M I D D L E S C H O O L I S a time of big changes for most students: a

different building, teams of teachers, and more homework. But my friend Kristin
Wolden Nitz tells me that in Merano, Italy, middle-school students have an added
challenge. Instead of greeting their teacher with a breezy ciao, which means both
“hello” and “goodbye,” they must respectfully say, “Good morning” or “Good
afternoon.” Instead of saying tu, the informal form of “you,” they must switch to
lei, the formal form of “you,” and the different verb conjugation that goes with it.

This might seem strange to Americans, since the English language—unlike
French, German, Spanish, and Italian—no longer has one mode of address for
strangers, store clerks, and superiors, and another for children, friends, and fam-
ily. (Thee and thou fell out of fashion after the time of Shakespeare.) But our
informal approach seems very odd to many Europeans. One Italian woman was
shocked that Americans do not even have a special way to address the president of
the United States.

From birth, all Italian children are addressed informally, with ciao and tu, by
absolutely everyone. At the same time, they hear their parents using the polite lei
pronoun form with adults who are not close friends or family. It is still, however,
an adjustment for students to begin speaking that way themselves. In school, those
who repeatedly forget to make the switch from the informal tu to the formal lei
will receive stern lectures, notes home, and even more homework. If the disrespect
continues, it may result in school suspension. With this kind of reprimand, is it
any wonder that most new middle-school students have said “ciao” to ciao by the
end of September? At least inside the school walls.

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