blackout book

If you were to look at my heart, my actual heart, it would look solid. Muscle and Sinew
and Vein All working together to push Life Around And around. But if you could see
my heart, SEE The center of me, the picture would be different. I once saw a
photograph Showing a series of caves Riddling what looked to be solid earth. After
eons and eons of wind and rain and human interaction the cave walls, seeming so
sturdy, Collapsed.

And everything that had grown
Or been built above,
Was destroyed.

Sometimes I feel Just like that.

I’ve been rather absent lately. It’s true I’ve been around but there is a nagging feeling
of not really being present. That absence of mind brought on by the desire to be in any
other place and time. Focus is not something that I ever had a nature skill for. That
lack of focus has grown more amplified lately. There is always something that comes
up, something that derails the train of thought. I handle stress about as well as tissue
paper handles a hurricane. So, another has come and went

Crippling a heart too many times spent
Unveiling a long-held conjecture
That no risk is worth the venture

How many times must you pay to be worthwhile,

And how many songs must you sing to subdue their guile. Most days you hide your
bloody mess Masquerading behind a pretty dress Praying that eyes would open to see
That beauty in you, and be filled with glee Yet you hardly ever give yourself a break
Chipping your figured marble for each mistake. Till what's left does not mirror the
you the you to cherish, and hold on to So you cast your stone and watch it drown
Hoping that a savior will come around Lift you out of the swallowing sea and restore
the love you once had for thee. But what was saved was not enough Maybe by now
your just too scuffed So another has come and went

Crippling a heart too many times spent
Unveiling a long-held conjecture
That no risk is worth the venture

I woke up and lay on my back thinking, "Okay, this isn't bad. I finally slept in." I
rolled over, threw back the covers and looked at the clock and said aloud “Why? I
really need sleep!"
It's been a long, tiring week and I really DO need a full night’s sleep. I walked about 5
miles last Sunday (which was so much fun at the time!) but am still suffering from it.
(which is to be expected) Doesn't look like it's going to happen any time soon.
This letter will probably take you by surprise, considering that we don't know each
other, but you have been preying on my mind and I feel I should let you know. Love
lies in the little things, they say. Whoever they are, I have to give them credit for being
right. I could tell you in big words that 'you pierce my soul' or that 'I kiss your vision
as it arises before my mind' but I won't. For not only are these not my words, but they
also would make this already difficult letter more awkward. Instead I would like to tell
you about all the seemingly trivial elements which, taken together, have planted a
seed of admiration for you in my mind, and made me want to be close to you.

Firstly, there is the way you move, particularly when you think you go unnoticed.
When you walk, your feet always seem to know where you're going. It is a determined
walk, whether it is done slow, or fast. There always seems to be something, or
someone, you are heading for. It makes me wish that someday this walk will be
coming towards me. Now and then you stop, and you move your head ever so slightly,
and I am thunderstruck by the elegance with which you perform this simple motion.
Your gestures, like your walk, always seem determined, but never forceful or
aggressive. Your hands hardly ever touch your body, yet the subtle movements of your
fingers give glimpses of a sensuality I so very much would like to know more of.

Of course, I believe you to be stunningly beautiful. Your eyes, nose, lips and cheeks
together form the essence of harmony to my vision, yet it is your voice that I try to
recall the most when I think of you. It is the kind of voice that awakens treasured
memories of bedtime stories and intimacy. When you speak, I want to close my eyes,
make myself comfortable and let any disruptive thoughts drift away. I tend to curse
whoever dares to disrupt your speech, as well as time since there never seems to be
enough of it for me to listen to you.

As you can see, I love you based on observation. I still don't know if you are smart, or
not; whether you are a good person, or bad. Do you like the mountains, or the sea?
Pop or jazz? Theatre or cinema? And do you know what you want for dinner every
day? You see, all of this might be important some time, but not right now, at this
moment, when I write this letter while imagining you walking towards me and telling
me in your beautiful voice that you love me too.

With all my love

The sun arose when you came into the room yesterday. For one shining moment, I
remembered everything that makes me love you. Night was vanquished; despair was

downtrodden into dust.

And then just as the warm rays of your smile, melted all my fears; all my insecurities;
I feel the deep pang of our sorrowful good byes scratch, and gnaw, and climb from my

gut, and the worry; the doubt; the solitude took over.

There has to be a better way. A singularity that can see us be together; not as one, but
as two, like two electrons whizzing around the atom of our love. Forever. In motion,
and yet motionless. But perhaps we already are, for we pass so close and yet we never

really connect... bonded by desire and attraction, and repulsed by ambition and
necessity

Do you know how little I sleep? I lay wake at night, daydreaming of our lives together,
while watching you breathe..slowly, peacefully, obliviously.

Why is time so cruelly slow when we are apart, and so sadistically short when we are
together. And yet I am the masochistic longing for the ever-fleeting moments... that

seem to come fewer and fewer.

The sun set when you left the room yesterday...

And then my world went quiet
I love you so very much but you don't really see me. You are in your world and I am in
mine. We co-exist on earth, in the same country, and we have a shared on-line space

but you can't see me and that makes me worry.

You are surrounded by others and their energy and I have fears of someone in my life
breaking my trust to get to you first. Don't be charmed by her.

I hope to see you soon and love always.

Dear You,

You're so special to me but you will never know it. I catch you looking at me but I
don't know if it's out of love or hate. I adore every aspect about you...even the not so
adorable.

You have a smile that ignites flush faces. You could power the universe with that
smile. You are one of the smartest people on this planet making you even shinier. I
put you on a pedestal not out of infatuation but because you are someone I wish I
could be. You're amazingly talented too.... I can't even put into words how you make
me pivot inside.

Oh, man and your sense of humor make me melt into puddles. I could think about
silly things you've said days later and smile to myself. You are odd and quirky, loving
and an ass. Luckily, you're a cute ass.... like the cutest really.

I don't know how to describe it. It's like you have this hold over me I cannot let go and
you've not once even looked in my eyes.

It's a thin line between love and hate and I can no longer read between lines. But I'll
chose love over hate which seems to be your motto.

So with this letter I love you and all the things you are. And I could only be so lucky to
love someone so lovely.

With a smile that could light the universe I close my eyes and dream. I hear you in my
ear drums and I'm immediately aroused physically and emotionally. I keep my eyes
closed and continue this dream. You would never want to be with someone like me I
could only be so lucky.

Everything about you is heavenly.... perfectly imperfect.
You are a universe I wish I could explore.
And again with this letter I proclaim my love and admiration.
A rambling of sweet nothings you'll never see. You're the Mac to my cheese.
Lovingly yours,

Me

I felt the brush of your hand against my thigh last night as we moved to the door to
say goodbye. My heart quickened and a little wave of exhilaration ran over me. These
small moments consume my thoughts. Sometimes during a dull tussle in the sheets, I
close my eyes and think of you. The way you'd touch me. Your breath on my neck. I
told myself long ago that I'd never submit to your poison but I can stop thinking
about you. What if instead of just watching you lick your lips as you debate at our
dinner parties I could feel them as they make their way down my collar bone. I feel
myself weaken with every moment we're near. I can't deny you anymore. Take me I'm
yours.

It’s unlikely you will read this. How do I know, because it’s the fourth time I have
tried and felt the need to make some sense of it all and putting these words on the
paper saps the only small amount of courage I have and my hearts courage falls way
short of ever letting you see them or it.

I could confess to all sorts of stupid emotions but to see them on the page
embarrasses me and they look so contrived. That’s not me there in the sentiment but
the vision of someone I would like to be, well I think it is, if only I could even be sure
of that. So randomly let me tell you I saw a Rook teasing a Squirrel in the neighbor’s
garden. While it was happening, I could think of no one but you I would want to see
that with, to have it actually happening right there, and you with me. It was You Tube
worthy and even though your crazy obsession for funny animal videos was never an
obsession of mine, hearing your laughter at them is mine. I imagined the sight of this
Rook and Squirrel would have become our unique shared memory, our New York
minute.

The possibility of you standing next to me alone, of course is preposterous, it would
have never happened. There is simply no sequence of events that would have brought
you here, that would have had you standing at the window close to and next to me.
Both of us laughing and peering out through the light rain to the neighbor’s garden to
see the unlikely dance of a rook and squirrel. I mean how absurd is that?
Even if you had, the limited or more accurately the non-existing elegance of this
single room would have been weighing far too heavily on my mind for me to be
comfortable with you being there. Reality always burns the romance don’t you think?

But if anything, the ridiculous possibility that still remains that you may one day be
here, that I confess exists still in some useless recess of my hopeful mind, has created
enough momentum to actually clean and tidy. I can’t say how long it will last; perhaps
only to the moment of realization that no one, let alone you, will come to this room.

So, what’s the point in well-ordered books or clean mugs or a fresh towel if there’s no
one else to notice them?

If I had the nerve I might approach you and tell you of the Rook and Squirrel but you
are never alone, and the only nerve I would have, would be amongst the nerves that
would shake whilst speaking to you. I wouldn’t be funny either as one hint of
misunderstanding in your gaze would derail my story I know. I guess I would end it
way before I had finished and just say `you would have to have just been there’.

And you were not.

I am trying to end this with a clever remark and I think I read or dreamt this idea but
would love to ask you `what has this world done to love.’
Because it’s ironic that Romeo now would be given a restraining order or worse for
pestering Juliet and gate crashing a party and climbing a balcony is surely classed as
breaking and entering. Well you get the picture, not that clever I know.

But I know how he felt.
I would take risks for you and,
I can say that I
Or maybe that you for me are
I need to start this again sorry

Your eyes are like the ocean. Calm and welcoming,
yet cold and treacherous.
Your laugh is like the wind.
So biting and fierce but when it hits, it's righteous.
Your hair is like the autumn leaves.
Forever dancing across your face as you remain mysterious.
To you I am just a friend.
To me you are my end. We are always so close
There is so much proximity Passing each other
In small spaces
Our bodies almost touching
And, too soon, you pass me by
Without a Backward glance
While I stare at you but discreetly
Because they can never know
How I dream
About our lips
Touching
About our hands
Intertwining
About our bodies
Together
About our legs
Tangled
In our bed in our house, our home
I think about your smile Your eyes crinkling in the corner
And you gently
Cupping my face as you draw it closer
For the best kiss, I will
Ever have Our laughs as we slip away
As we are wild Beneath the desks
I will always think about you And I know you never will

Our path crosses with an imperfect time, where everything has not been in places.
Living in the present, and then the future was merely out of reach.
Perfectly fine in our own world, in our small space and own pace.
I wasn't ready, and clearly, you were satisfied being by yourself.

Meeting you terrifies me the most, but it felt so good... like a street lamp in a gloomy
night. Even though you're far away, knowing that you are there to guide me in the
same way as a light in the halfway of the road makes me feel safe.
Like a ticking clock at night...
I couldn't see it, but I can hear its existence.

We were entangled with an offbeat sound, but eventually, we learned to move freely.
Your voice drifted me to unparalleled worlds

You let my eyes witnessed how amazing the stars can be, and gave me the reason to
fall in love with its gleam.

Indeed, it was so unrealistic.
The imperfect time felt like just a perfect moment for us.

The stars are high, High as I, striving to grasp, trying to fly. Arriving in last,
But wondering why, my efforts are there, why isn't she mine,
Send me a sign,
Motivation to move, I've put in all of me, but felt none of you,
Am I fighting myself?
Am I fighting to lose?

Should I throw in a towel, Repress the abuse? All I want is my muse,
I don't want to be used, I want things to move smooth,

Instead of the seizing, instead of the heartbreak Instead of the grieving,
But I'm not settling,

Just packing and leaving,
Cause if a piece is all I get, Then I guess I'll be peacing

How much I love you.
You don't understand
and I can't explain. I'm a hurricane You don't even like rain. You're a wild fire
But I'm not afraid to burn. I'm an encyclopedia of secrets You didn't even want to
learn. You were building walls That I was taking down.
You always made me smile
Though I wanted to frown.
I wanted you to be my king
But you didn't even like the crown

This is a poem for you, I don't think that I can tell you, But I can write what I feel. I
think about you all day, I watch you pass and I smile. My heart isn't made of steel.
Your voice hypnotizes me, everything disappears, when you are here. My heartbeat
accelerates, my body trembles, When I imagine a "we are..."

I'm someone normal,
In love, with

Someone special. Hiding my love Like a big secret, Confidential. and what I adored
about you on that luminescent afternoon, was not your lineage
of white curtains and dancing shoes-t’was the casual cruelty of the privileged. My love
for you was random, our lives now run in tandem.
I seek to hold you close to me. A place from which you cannot flee.
Our hearts they link together, I know the storms we had to weather.
I recall without trying, those times you broke through my crying.
While I stayed with you through through thick and thin, our year’s trail on or begin
again. If someone asked if I would have traded it all, I laugh and say it was never my
call. We cannot help for those we care,
It's our lives we will always share.
The night time is our time. In our dreams, we are together.
You are the Queen and I am your king. Our castle is a ruin wrapped in ivy,
And the stars are our ceiling. You are the dark queen. The Mistress of all Dark
Desires.

You know what you do to me and you love it.

Every time I want to escape, your kisses make me long to return.
What spell is laced within your lips that makes me crave you more?
When I give into you, it fills me with sorrow
As the light of day wipes away your image.
I'm in my room, without you.
Left only with thirst for your kiss once more.

You have me, I'm yours.
And you know it.

I can see
he wants to touch her
but instead
he lays his hand
softly
so very softly
on the back
of her chair
instead of reaching
that extra inch
he's just close enough
to be too far
Always in love with waitresses
Yet you don't know to wait
You run to magic places
And I am always late.
And by the time I get there
All that I want, I miss
A single moment for us to share
To get to know you, is my wish.
Because you might not be my fate
Neither the woman of my dreams
But you're a miracle and I am late
While you vanish in rainbow beams.
But even when I am getting close
It's hard for me to make a move
To give you a poem, a kiss, a rose
At least that you exist to prove.
Because you might not be my fate
Neither the woman of my dreams
But I would love to have a date
With you, someday, by any means.

Oh Devil, I Love You! Punctual, Loyal, truthful, trusted, Lusty but, fun.
You are them, by virtue. It's 4 AM and I am thinking about where I was seven years
ago, stranded on a massive west coast island. I walked into a coffee shop and waited
in line, four people deep each and every one of us on our phones while we waited.
The line ticked down and I stepped forward accordingly until I met the counter, this
faux marble piece with every kitschy wicker, business card holder, tip jar, 'Donation'
box option laid out to clutter, enough that there was barely enough room for the
plates full of vegan delightfulness and wake-me-up dark blends that were being
served that day. I pulled my eyes from the screen I had been scrolling on, some few
hundred artists that would help me plan the musical I would attempt from here to the
aquarium three blocks down and saw you for the first time ever.
I remember watching you stop when you caught my eyes. I remember pausing while
my order evaporated in my head. I remember an apologetic smile while you tried to
sort out who you were again and who I might be and why we were at the counter
together.

"Sorry, what can I get you?"
And I smiled as apologetically and tried for dear life to remember what I wanted or to
make a joke out of the fact I forgot or something worth a bit of your time because this
moment was already falling away in favor of reality and I was a little desperate to keep
hold of it.

"Hot chocolate?"

Like I wasn't sure, but you gave me an expression of confidence and assurance and
nodded along for the ride and I felt like I had made the right choice despite the fact
this was the first time I had ever been here before. I still think it was the right choice,
not because it was especially good hot chocolate or that it was summer and the
temperature was nowhere close to what might require a hot beverage but because you
didn't scoff or snort at my hiccup of desperate.
Just grinned and said
"Coming up"

And I slipped off to the side, leaving behind a bill for the effort and plinking coins into
donation boxes and tip jars as evenly as I could, still trying to remember if I was
hungry or not and whether I had another excuse to go up and order more things.
I didn't.
And I regret only going back a few more times trying to hunt down courage and
daring to talk to you a bit further than my order or a thank you or a 'How is your day
going' before my vacation was over and it was time to go back to work two whole
provinces away.

I think I even have a copy of the letter I wrote you on my last day. The one I typed
because my hand writing is atrocious but signed at the bottom so that you know I
meant it. That talked about comic books and genuineness and connections I didn't
think were possible in so short a time span as it takes to say 'Hello'.

I left it with Chuck or Brad or Matt, asking them to please...please make sure
"Ilona gets this. It's important."

I don't even remember if you did. I don't even know if you're married or unavailable
or completely and utterly in love elsewhere and else when in your current life but I
was thinking about you and what you did seven years ago, and I just...had to say, in
brief how much I loved it.

Just saying.

A boy asked me what is art I said you’ll know when you meet her Art’s hidden in a
woman’s heart and comes out only, when you greet her. Then as expression’s truest
form Art will be in everything around you to make you feel cozy and warm to make
you see the beauty inside you. Love is art, and art is love So full of beauty, the
essential one A flood of emotions, you always have but poor out, when you come
undone.

I never knew love, the boy replied I can’t wait to meet her, and then he cried. I am
content to know that you exist to watch you to imagine your life I will never Really
know you But I will always Wonder
And hope that you are happy. I am tempted to replace the last word with "content".
It has more of a feeling of coming full circle and implying that they,
too, likely experience this with someone else.

We met in Arizona in a never-ending summer
A small Brazilian lady Introduced us to one another
Little did I know, this would become an unhealthy infatuation
I would hide you from all others My eyes dilated, became hazy and steadied
You were breathtaking I inspected your curves Where you concave and lift
Where your soft edges feel best on my lips I never knew,
We looked so good together What struck me first was the way you move
To my tongue, you are a vibrant foreigner You hold a sweetness so potent
You cannot help but spill from your corners
It took some patience, some money, Some trial and error too

But my love,
Every failed attempt was worth it
To simply partake of you You must know as the years pulled us away to the arms of
another
Hard times meant artificial substitutes Which did not satisfy this hunger When they
say you are not good, you seem flimsy and cheap Make them sick to their stomach,
Make them disgusted and leave This is not their choice my love,
They've never known you’re as I do
You are more than my confection

You are my home I come to
We met up again, with some wings and chips
I took my time to reintroduce Your soft, honey glaze
To my sugar- starved lips You outshine every temptation Every poor excuse

Tonight, we will meet again
It is you, I choose

you remind me of a poem called ‘the main purpose of the heart
is to make heart sounds’ which sounds about right,

I must say, at a time when my heart quakes
are destroying entire cities and killing people in the process
I apologize. was it so impolite
to inform you that your nothing more than entering my life
has disrupted the plate tectonics
and crashed continents against each other?
incidentally, half of Europe is keeping us apart although I agree it would be easier
with my back against your back against my back (with your lips upon my lips upon
your lips) each one of us merely responsible for half of the known universe
I think I would manage to breath incidentally
were it skin, rather than distance connecting us my heart would then go back
to making heart sounds and I would be sealing
all plate boundaries with silicone glue

When I met you at first The physical appeal was Like a struggle Too real I was trying to keep
my eye simple Keep my heart single I wasn't ready to feel And this is not the first time I've
been tempted to gamble I've lost before I've even played So I rambled I miscommunicated
Came off cold and understated And I've since hated Myself for it But despite it Somehow I
managed to get your contact In my phone Could this be my out Of the dread forever alone?

No.

Because I picked up a vibe You were into someone else And far be it for me To stand in the
way of love Since I'm sure of what we have is barely half of A one sided infatuation at best
Turns out the other guy didn't work out I don't dare pry Of course if you had to cry I'd gladly
offer you my shoulder But of course then there's the distance And I don't mean the tension
I'd mention it But the risk isn't worth the reward That's what I tell myself And it may be what
I'm afraid of is you saying

Yes.

I don't know what to do with that Because I've never been in a relationship That wasn't
platonic and chronically it’s been fine Until you came and hook me in with your charm What
harm could come from that? I don't know but the friendship is so precious I couldn't muck
that up on the risk of awkwardness Even though you had me floored And I couldn't ignore
I'm too frightened of the risk of getting the reward

I live through you
and see you do
the things I'd love to dare
You speak to me
from across seas
through waves of blue-eyed stares
You live in dreams
or so it seems

You can't possibly be real
Dream of me, too
and I'll come true
My heart is yours to steal
Dear, dear,
sickly sweet love of mine.
Are you fine?
I looked for you.

At your home.
and mine too.
In your memories.
and mine too.
I even looked for you
in the love letters, I wrote.
But never sent you.
I went to the place where
we used to meet.
Everyday.

Remember? cuddle with you. Sing with you.
The time we killed, Plan with you. Everyday,
To find a place, which no one can find. In my mind.
Where I used to look at you and,
praise you Love you The place where we made promises,
Of coming to, until we are ashes.
And now, I can't even find them.
I had a dream. A beautiful set of irises, she had.
Not a dream but, an image. kept me amused. wondering.
Not an image but, a mold. Turned golden yellow
Not a mold but, a girl. to dead gray!? Unlike you.
Not even in the lieu.
Giggle, Squiggle. Tickle.
and Fickle. “Three men walked into a bar…”
My features, not hers. Unlike you.
Forgot even about, the drowning star.
With a dimple and a tinkle. Not even in the lieu.
Yea, though I walk through the valley
I will fear no evil;
for she was with me; of the shadow of death,
Until divinity is not a fringe.
Unlike you. She made fire. cooked satire.
Not even in the lieu. Her music shattered to shard.

but, she prayed hard.
Earned every dime. Had all

the time.

Never screamed no fowl. Not even in the lieu.
Knew how to growl. It just wasn’t you.
Flew miles away. You.
Our string had no sway.
Unlike you. Lone you. A notch in the frame.
An imperfection.
With my utmost attention.
The masterpiece went blur. love coffee black.
Her hailing was divine. She made me laugh.
You are the evidence. You make me happy.
Gray is hip but, Undaunted beauty.
Sore eyes felt better.
Right out of the bubble.
Set me free. A perfection. She, was a dream.
A perfect you. You are, Something beyond it.
Oodles of lines for her.
A realization of you. Cold and dark.
Dark and cold.
No one was so bold. No one dared a step on it.
So, it was told.
A ball. A gift-wrapped ball. That is me.
Untouched and pristine. The sole emperor; moon.
Pristine and never touched. For a million years, so soon.

That is me.
The sole soul; moon.

At least, for a million years so soon.

But, then for the first time in eons, an intruder broke through the fourth wall. For the
first time in eons, a someone broke through the wall. There are always four walls.
Fear, sight, trust and love. “There are always no walls. No fear, no sight, no trust and
no love." She uttered. "An average human being is afraid of a stranger, even in
paradise." I bawled. "Only an 'average' human being can be afraid of someone, even in
paradise." She roared. "Your sight, won't be as otherworldly as mine." I twinkled.
"Your sight, won't be as majestic as mine." She tickled. "You'll fly away from me. I
fear, I'd burst" I cried. "You'll fly away from me, I know, I'd burst." She smirked.
"I'm afraid if Cupid can share anything with me?" I smirked. "I'm afraid if all Cupid
does is be jealous me." She kissed. She taught me, how to fall. For she makes it
happen all the time. She taught me, how to long. For she makes it happen all the time.
She taught me, how to die. For I need to reciprocate all the time. She taught me, how
to survive the throng. For I was a patchy moon and, she was my grainy Neil
Armstrong. I’d Tickle the devil and, Praise the other one. Even if it costs me an arm, a
leg, or probably the plural. Run to the edge of the world or back, if you wish. Be the
hero. Be shrewd. Or the guy in the third row of the lewd. Be the monkey. Be the
clown. Your eyes, to me They’re sown. I’d stare into the medusa. Be stoned and live
forever as a masterpiece, like your crevice below the extra set of eyes. with a smirk.
Just, like the thousands of parchments, I would’ve written. Just, to turn those eyes
glassy. Just, to see you smile. Before we start,

I want to warn you.

That, I don’t want to scorn you. But, the lines aren’t about you but, me. Even though,
you’ll be the one on a cake killing spree. Introverts. That’s what they call people from
our clan. You know, the ones who find solace in solemnity. Who feel a bulge in
brevity? And, like the previous lines, throw a bagful of uncommon syllables, trying to
express that they are witty. Yeah, the same. Exactly, the same me. I try to be witty but,
it melts, like me, to insignificance and wee. I try to be intelligent. As it has been
redundant, I believe. In your presence, dear shrewd, my gray matter turns pale,
I perceive. Beer makes you creative, I’ve heard. You’re my beer, beep beep. Sorry, I
cannot utter the next word. Staring into a set eyes, gives me discomfit. But,
“Your eyes feel like home.” Oh, that’s not me, it's Taylor swift. Speaking of
discomfit,(see, I did it again!)

I apologize.

I think we are on the wrong plain. For, this verse isn’t about me. For, it is about, me,
before you. For the chubby cheeks. For the girl who never speaks. For the piggy nose.
Which compliments the body, of course. For those thick black hairs. Running over the
face, Beautiful and fair. For those beady eyes. Black as the night, deceptive as spies.

Oh, don't ask me about the lips. Ah! So heavenly, when they hold your fingertips.
Those dangling in your ears. Perfection attained, after striving for years.

For the features, I have mentioned. Woulda spoke about all, if time was sanctioned.
Writing about you is nothing but a bliss. A beautiful poem for a beautiful miss. There

is a girl in the front of my class, Who I find hard to look away from or pass.
She's got a voice like an angel, A face like on too and a flimsy facade I can always see
through. She should be up in the stars, because that's where she belongs Not here on

earth pulling my heart out with tongs. Though this beauty in the front of my class,
Has no idea she holds my heart like a piece of glass for her mind is unlike mine,
When it comes to whom she chooses to love. or she doesn't know I'm a curly fry
And instead chooses to swoon over some guy
Doesn't she know about my addiction?
Doesn't she see?
Sometimes, I'll admit,
Straight people scare me.

I'm a little shy when it comes to you
I don't know why but it's kind of fun
You make my body quiver
And all you have to do is smile you are captivating because you are terrifying and in so
many ways you are exquisite, lovely, elegant.
You are so wrong and all the most perfect ways
And I, I have no choice but to love you too love every little detail within you.
And I hate you so much I want so bad to despise you
But how? one look at you makes all the terror disappear and you are all the wrong in
such a perfect way.
And though you may not ever know that I exist
I can only hope that you may notice me though I won't take the risk.

Pastel petals fall before her.
Gentle strides swish enamored air.

Devotion wears un-kissed lips.
Patience into oblivion.

You never knew that I loved you?
Did you?

You never knew you made my heart sing?
Did you?

You never knew you never knew
It made me blue
I wish you knew

God I wish you knew

I don't know how And I don't know why
But I still love you Even though I try
To forget the moments You filled my
Built me up After I fell apart You wear gone From heart
My love for you Becoming a different mind
But then I hear that song Or remember your kind
Or the joy you brought The stories I've words
And committed to ink The story of heard
These memories I dare not trust My head to
And keep safe So I’ll write them us
In a quiet place hold
down

I loved you once

I love you still
Now as a friend
My heart you fill

Our love was but a whisper
that only I could hear,
now I ‘am deaf to your words,
the whisper is silent.
our love was a shadow
on a wall of secrets,
that I could only see,
now that image fades
with each setting sun,
I ‘am blinded by the truth
that we could never be.
She IS a member of the ether.
The product of electricity and pixel.
A flight of fancy in his brain.
He only knows her vaguely through her
handful of pictures, and her words.
But it's enough.
It's not love, just an infatuation,
This child of the web.
This Dark eyed beauty.
Her words are gorgeous.
Her face is gorgeous.
She IS so gorgeous.
He sighs and get on with his day.