OCTOBER 2023 • 149 FUN AND GAMES Word Power IT PAYS TO INCREASE YOUR BY SAMANTHA RIDEOUT “Say” is a versatile verb, but there are plenty of other options waiting to be heard. Take this quiz to fill your vocabulary with alternate ways of describing speech 1. animadvert—A: speak out against something. B: advertise through word of mouth. C: use a gentle tone. 2. parry—A: repeat. B: wonder aloud. C: skilfully evade a question. 3. asseverate—A: declare emphatically. B: make a counterargument. C: insult viciously. 4. concede—A: whine. B: grudgingly admit. C: explain a plan. 5. repine—A: say with a yawn. B: express discontent. C: contemplate. 6. jape—A: mock. B: talk with food in one’s mouth. C: boast. 7. calumniate—A: agree without thinking. B: make a false and defamatory statement. C: take an unlikely guess. 8. perorate—A: threaten. B: deliver a long speech. C: mumble nervously. 9. inveigle—A: invoke supernatural beings. B: encourage someone to break the law. C: persuade with deception or flattery. 10. ratiocinate—A: reason logically. B: provide feedback. C: pronounce a judgment. 11. philippise—A: advocate under the influence of corruption. B: console. C: convey particularly unwelcome news. 12. importune—A: recite a poem. B: offer assistance. C: request persistently. 13. upbraid—A: describe enthusiastically. B: gossip behind someone’s back. C: scold. 14. ballyhoo—A: praise extravagantly. B: shout hoarsely. C: gloat. 15. quaver—A: whisper. B: ask a rhetorical question. C: speak with a trembling voice.
VOCABULARY RATINGS 7–10: fair 11–12: good 13–15: excellent W O R D P O W E R Answers 150 • OCTOBER 2023 1. animadvert—[A] speak out against something; First Nations leaders animadverted upon the pipeline’s threat to the watershed. 2. parry—[C] skilfully evade a question; “Do you want someone experienced or someone capable?” parried the candidate when asked about her employment history. 3. asseverate—[A] declare emphatically; Cayman was a bad juror; he believed everything the witness asseverated, no matter how absurd. 4. concede—[B] grudgingly admit; “I guess my trainer was right when she said I wasn’t ready for a marathon,” conceded Ayako. 5. repine—[B] express discontent; During lunch breaks, Donovan’s coworkers would listen to him repine over having left his village. 6. jape—[A] mock; Sofia pre-empted any japing about her ears by calling herself the love child of Prince Charles and Mr Spock. 7. calumniate—[B] make a false and defamatory statement; Hoping to snag Husni’s job for herself, Mathilda calumniated him as a thief. 8. perorate—[B] deliver a long speech; The conference delegates sighed with relief when the organiser finished perorating. 9. inveigle—[C] persuade with deception or flattery; “Can’t you inveigle any celebrities to attend my party?” pleaded the socialite. 10. ratiocinate—[A] reason logically; Actions are motivated by desires, so morality can’t be based on reason alone, Hume ratiocinated. 11. philippise—[A] advocate under the influence of corruption; Pavithra suspected the mayor was philippising when he praised the local factory’s safety record. 12. importune—[C] request persistently; Tired of hearing his kids importuning him to bring them to Disney World, Eugenio gave in. 13. upbraid—[C] scold; Liese upbraided her sister for having called their mother a cheapskate. 14. ballyhoo—[A] praise extravagantly; Mateo’s boyfriend ballyhooed his homemade lasagna so much that he wondered if he was teasing him. 15. quaver—[C] speak with a trembling voice; “Do I have to read my book report aloud to the class?” the child quavered.
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152 • OCTOBER 2023 FUN & GAMES Brain GAMES Sharpen Your Mind pic-a-pix: hayloft by diane baher; it all adds up by fraser simpson 4 2 2 4 4 1 1 1 1 4 1 7 1 1 1 1 1 1 7 1 2 4 2 2 3 3 10 2 2 1 1 1 1 1 2 1 1 1 1 1 2 2 Pic-A-Pix: Hayloft Medium Reveal a hidden picture by shading in groups of horizontally or vertically adjacent cells. The numbers represent how many shaded cells are in each of the corresponding row's or column’s groups (for example, a “3” next to a row represents three horizontally adjacent shaded cells in that row). There must be at least one empty cell between each group. The numbers read in the same horizontal or vertical order as the groups they represent. There’s only one possible picture; can you shade it in? It All Adds Up Difficult Each letter from A through H has one of the eight values: 1, 2, 8, 9, 10, 12, 19 or 21. No two letters have the same value. Determine which number goes with each letter to make the equations correct. A + B = C B + C = D D + E = G C + G = F E + H = F
OCTOBER 2023 • 153 s For answers, turn to PAGE 155 orting apples by emily goodman ; museum tour by darren rigby; (apples illustration) yuliia konakhovska/getty images 1 1 Museum Tour Medium On a visit to the Museum of Stubbornness, Alex picks up a guided audio tour that leads visitors through the rooms in a prescribed order. In the spirit ofthemuseum, Alex decides to pick his own route. Both the official route and Alex’s route go through every room once, with no backtracking and no rooms skipped. Using the clues below, reconstruct both routes on the map (north is at the top of the map). 1. Other than room #1, Alex doesn’t visit any room in the intended order of the tour. 2. The recording tells visitors to head east from room #1. 3. Alex’s fourth room occupies a corner of the building. He left this room heading south. 4. The guided tour’s fourth room has more doors than its fifth room. Sorting Apples Easy One of these apples is not like any of the others. Which is the odd one out?
CROSSWISE Test your general knowledge. Answers on p158 fl ffi fl ffi ACROSS 8 Part of a sentence (6) 9 Newbie (8) 10 Where Drake bowled (8) 11 Put the phone down (4,2) 12 "Late December, back in ---" (The Four Seasons) (5-5) 14 Somewant to eat this and still have it (4) 15 Used in a supermarket (8,7) 18 Send (4) 20 Upbeat (10) 22 He had a talking donkey (6) 23 Herb often foundwith lamb (8) 25 Relating to a lawcourt (8) 26 Burgertopping (6) DOWN 1 Puerile (8) 2 Inner surface of the hand (4) 3 Take off (6) 4 Gettingwarm (2,3,5,5) 5 Kind of earimplant (8) 6 Mealtime annoyances (5,5) 7 Hitting something (6) 13 Old-style audio accessory (4,6) 16 The Man in the --- (Dumas novel) (4,4) 17 A personwho settles elsewhere (8) 19 Kind of collision (4-2) 21 Regimental animal (6) 24 Chief in size orimportance (4) B R A I N G A M E S
OCTOBER 2023 • 155 R E A D E R ’ S D I G E S T FROM PAGE 152 BRAIN GAMES ANSWERS BY Louis-Luc Beaudoin SUDOKU 1 8 4 5 3 7 9 2 6 3 4 6 9 7 8 5 9 2 7 1 1 4 3 5 8 2 3 6 7 5 9 4 8 1 1 5 9 8 3 4 7 2 6 7 8 4 1 6 2 9 5 3 6 9 5 4 8 3 2 1 7 8 7 2 6 1 5 3 4 9 3 4 1 2 9 7 5 6 8 5 1 3 9 4 8 6 7 2 4 6 7 3 2 1 8 9 5 9 2 8 5 7 6 1 3 4 SOLUTION To Solve This Puzzle Put a number from 1 to 9 in each empty square so that: ) every horizontal row and vertical column contains all nine numbers (1-9) without repeating any of them; ) each of the outlined 3 x 3 boxes has all nine numbers, none repeated. 1 2 4 3 5 6 11 10 8 7 1 2 3 4 8 5 7 9 10 11 6 9 Pic-A-Pix: Hayloft It All Adds Up A = 8, B = 1, C = 9, D = 10, E = 2, F = 21, G = 12, H = 19 Sorting Apples The apple on the upper right. It’s the only one of the apples with two leaves on its stem. Museum Tour The numbers represent the guided tour, and the line follows Alex’s path.
WIN £30 for the reader’s joke we publish! Your amateurlion tamer name is your regular name prefixed by “the late”. PAUL BASSETT DAVIES (@THEWRITERTYPE) I was born in a bungalow, and I’ve lived there ever since. Storey of my life. SANJEEV KOHLI (@GOVINDAJEGGY) There’s a new charity who put an abacus in my bra. They can count on my support. SAM (@SAM_BAMBS) People don’treally like me making puns about Italian Renaissance artists or Swiss tennis players, but I’m quite happy to Raphael a few Federers. PAUL EGGLESTON (@PAULEGGLESTON) People who make coupons have their work cut out. GARY DELANEY (@GARYDELANEY) The worst thing about being a depressive with an Oedipus complex is sometimes I just wish I was dad. WILLIAM STONE (@ITSWILLIAMSTONE) Don’t want to brag, but at school I was voted most likely to cling on to past achievements. CRAIG DEELEY (@CRAIGUITO) When does a joke become a dad joke? When it’s fully groan. OLAF FALAFEL (@OFALAFEL) Go to readersdigest.co.uk/contact-us or facebook.com/readersdigestuk FUN & GAMES My friends are always giving me a hard time about my obsessionwithTheBeatles. I wish they’d let it be. MATTHEW SMITH, Sheffield vector_brothers / alamy stock vector
OCTOBER 2023 • 157 Acomic knownforher appearancesonTVcomedypanel shows, AngelaBarneshas swappeda careerinhealthcare for stand-up. IanChaddockasksher aboutherfunniest experiences… Angela Barnes Which stand-up special made you fall in love with comedy? Victoria Wood’s show Sold Out, which I had actually seen the year before it came out on video (yes video, I’m in my forties) when she did it as Up West at the Strand Theatre in London. It was my first live comedy and this woman just had everyone eating out of the palm of her hand, it was like watching magic. She was hilarious, and I utterly fell in love with how words alone could make people react together in such a joyous way. God, she was a legend. What’s the weirdest heckle you’ve ever heard and how did you reply? I remember once being on stage when a small voice piped up, “I think your eyes make you look unhappy”. I responded by just saying, “Are you sure it’s my eyes, or is it maybe because I’m in Chatham?”. What’s your funniest live show experience? I recently did a show at a naturist festival. I opted to stay fully clothed, but the audience was made up of a couple of hundred fully naked people, which was nerve-wracking. Usually, you’re told to imagine the front row naked, but it doesn’t help when they actually are. They were a really fun crowd though and up for laughing at themselves. At one point a couple of women got up to go to the loo, and I said, “Don’t too many of you do that at once or I’ll think I’m getting a round of applause”. Sometimes different elements come together to make a show special and I felt that feeling at this show full of nudists. I got a standing ovation at the end, and, I’ll be honest, I don’t think I’ll ever unsee it. You used to work in health and social care before making stand up your career. Did comedy help ASK A COMEDIAN
L A U G H CROSSWORD ANSWERS Across: 8 Phrase, 9Neophyte, 10 Plymouth, 11Hung up, 12 Sixty-three, 14Cake, 15 Shopping trolley, 18 Ship, 20Optimistic, 22 Balaam, 23 Rosemary, 25 Forensic, 26Onions. Down: 1Childish, 2 Palm, 3Deduct, 4On the righttrack, 5Cochlear, 6 Phone calls, 7 Struck, 13 Tape player, 16 Ironmask, 17 Emigrant, 19Head-on, 21Mascot, 24Main. you with the stresses of working in healthcare? Definitely, some of the funniest people I know are from my old jobs. If you are working with people at some of the lowest points in their life, it can be hard not to take that on yourself a bit. When it’s appropriate, some levity can help both you and them. And, of course, in the staff rooms, when you’ve had a tough day and limited resources means you can’t help someone as much as you wanted to, humour can be the only way to break that tension and get you back into work the next day. It could be dark, and you might say things there that you would never say anywhere else, but it’s an important valve when you work in those fields. How would you describe your stand-up show Hot Mess? It’s probably the most personal show I have done. But it’s funny, I promise. At its core it’s about friendship and tells a story of something that happened in my life while all our lives were being rocked by a global pandemic. But most importantly, there are jokes—loads of them. Angela Barnes tours theUKwith her showHot Mess in September andOctober “WHEN YOU HEAR ‘TREAT’ BUTYOU’RE ON A DIET” Via boredpanda.com and kingdomofdoggos.com Canine Confusion
R E A D E R ’ S D I G E S T OCTOBER 2023 • 159 Think of awitty caption forthis cartoon—the three best suggestions, alongwith the cartoonist’s original,will be posted on ourwebsite inmid-OCTOBER. If your entry gets themost votes, you’llwin £50. Submit to [email protected] byOCTOBER 7. We’ll announce thewinner in ourNovemberissue. Our cartoonist’s caption, “That’s the book he said was unputdownable…”, failed to beat our reader Kevin Christian, who won the vote with, “He’lltell his mates that he has had his head in a book all through his holidays.” Congratulations, Kevin! AUGUST WINNER Beat the Cartoonist! cartoons by Royston Robertson IN THE NOVEMBER ISSUE Unveiling the hidden stories within paintings through conservation ART REDISCOVERED How should we tackle the problem of overtourism? SUSTAINABLE TRAVEL I R E M E M B E R … Clive Myrie The journalist and Mastermind host looks back on his life and career
160 • OCTOBER 2023 Archaeologists have found a mythical “gate to the underworld” in the pre-Columbian ruins of Mitla in Oaxaca, Mexico. Legends of a complex labyrinth of tunnels, believed to lead to the entrance of the “Land of the Dead”, outlived Mitla itself. Mitla was the most important site of the ancient Zapotec culture, and was built as a gateway between the world of the living and the world of the dead, reflecting the Mesoamerican belief that death was the most important part of life after birth. The ancient Zapotec people settled in Oaxaca Valley before the turn of the first millennium, and around 1000 CE the Mixtec people also migrated into G O O D N E W S the area. When the Spanish arrived in the 16th century, Mitla was home to a rich culture including a writing system, two calendar systems and sophisticated farming and construction techniques. In 1553, Oaxacan Archbishop Albuquerque ordered the destruction of the Mitla site due to its political and religious significance for the Zapotec people. Spanish-led forces sacked the site, displacing the Zapotec, and the ruins of Mitla were used as materials for building Spanish churches. Today, it is one of the most important archaeological sites in Oaxaca. Ancient rumours of a gate to the Zapotec underworld, known as Lyobaa, sealed hundreds of years ago by frightened Spanish missionaries, persisted. These legends spurred Mexican archaeologists to launch an exploration of Mitla in 2022, using non-invasive geophysical survey tools to see what secrets lay hidden beneath the site’s surface. A report released by the team of archaeologists confirmed the existence of an underground labyrinth beneath the ruins of a Catholic Church at the site. Chambers and tunnels were identified, with passages between 16 and 26 feet underground. The team has planned further investigations to find out more. Hopefully they don’t accidentally open the gate to the land of the dead! by alice gawthrop An ancient underground labyrinth has been discovered in Mexico GOOD NEWS from around the World
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