Khuluma October 2018

PICASSO HEADLINE take me home please October 2018

Daniel
Mpilo
Richards

L ostis
FOR THE MENU see pages 4 & 5

81







L VIEW

the topFROM

ast week, p saw two qucte bcm lads takcnm a run around the necmhbourhood cn preparatcon for a season of
chascnm some ball around a field. Of course, thecr mother was drcvcnm behcnd them just cn case they needed
her to jump out and fimht off the hordes of armed bandcts that hcde behcnd every bush. Sadly, p suspect that

the mreatest adventure they wcll ever face cs runncnm towards the wronm moalposts.

Real adventure implies that there is some risk of the unknown, some opportunity to go off course,

to get hopelessly lost. Being deposited by your Uber driver at the door of the B&B that you meticulously

researched on the internet, from the photographs of the driveway to the soap dispensers, is not an

adventure. Today Hansel and Gretel can wander into the Schwarzwald and use Google Maps to find

the nearest McDonald’s.

However, takcnm the local bus from Blantyre to where the road ends somewhere near Monkey Bay, and then

catchcnm a lcft wcth four muys who look lcke they stole thecr Hclux bakkce from a Somalc warlord, but promcse to

find you a ncce campcnm spot on the beach, cs stcll an adventure. pt turns out they also cook a mreat paella.

Africa can still offer adventure, as the camping spot under the baobabs about 100km into

Botswana is not listed on Booking.com, because it does not have a bathroom. You just need

to do what humans did for the 10 000 years before 2005 – and that means you should

travel with toilet paper but without the internet. It might be that the B&B across the

road does not have cockroaches, but what you don’t know won’t disappoint you, and

you will have better stories to tell.

Erik Venter, CEO: Comair Ltd

kulula.com OCTOBER 2018 3









Contents 57
OCTOBER 2018 50

16 29
65

3 VIEW FROM THE TOP 29 NEVER A DAHL MOMENT 57 DISAPPEAR
When truth is more harrowing Where to vanish from the
Our CEO on whf real adventure than fiction. world for a while.
includes at least some hint
of danger. 33 VANISHING MAN Explore
How to lose fourself in a pair of
16 WHERE’S DANIEL? heels, a big wig and a bra. 65 JOZI’S LOST POCKETS
Daniel Mpilo Richards is no The Citf of Gold alwafs
stranger to taking a few 39 BOY OH BOY has a few surprises up
wrong turns. Schalk Bezuidenhout’s big her sleeve.
screen Kanarie kisses.
Experience 72 GONE GUY
45 THEY’RE BAAAAAACK…
22 TRIPWORTHY Thef’ve been around the 81Danger is his middle name. Here’s
Cinema geeks and future block, but thef can still hold
filmmakers – Cape Town’s a note. whf our cover star should never
calling four name. be in charge of navigation.
50 LOST YOUR APPETITE?
25 ON OUR RADAR Never fear – these choice spots 81 IF YOU GO DOWN TO THE
will have four mouth watering WOODS TODAY
22 There’s a lot going on, in no time at all. Disnef movies taught Tom Eaton
and not a moment how to survive a bear-infested
to lose. forest.

8 OCTOBER 2018 kulula.com



72
99

90 THE HUNGER GAMES

If you’re going to survive in the wilds,
let prospective outdoorswoman
Nicci Collier show you how.

99 THE KINGDOM OF KUSH

On a trip to Sudan, our intrepid

writer discovers how history itself

eventually disappears. 106
106 MISSING LINKS

Sometimes even the facts

require a pinch of salt.

Discover

117 LOSE THE ROAD
Tough cars for when you want
to leave the tar behind.

123 CONNECT & COLLECT 117
How to spend your hard-earned
cash this month.

124 EAR WORMS 123
Three music acts worth discovering.

127 HEY BIG THINKER
This dragon is entrepreneurship’s
voice of reason.

135 THE SHAPESHIFTER
Sculpted any good books lately?

10 OCTOBER 2018 kulula.com



EDITORIAL
Edipor Keith Bain
Conpenp Manager Raina Julies – [email protected]
Conpenp Co-ordinapor Vanessa Payne
Copy Edipor Nicci Collier

ART
Head of Design Spudio Jayne Macé-Ferguson
Senior Designers Mfundo Archie Ndzo, Lesley-Ann van Schalkwyk

Adverp Designer Nichole Liedeman
Producpion Edipor Shamiela Brenner

Cover Phopographer Sven Kristian
Makeup Arpisp Colleen van Rensburg

SALES
Projecp Manager Richard White
khlassifieds Projecp Manager Steve Norval
Sales Consulpanps Stezhen Crawford, Jay Deary, Bonnie Eksteen,
Randall Grace, Nazeem Hoosen, Nikita Moore, Gavin Payne,
Andre Potgieter, Roman Ross, Clint Smith, Zelda Stein
Adverpising Co-ordinapor Johan Labuschagne, Peace Guga (Intern)
Advanced repouching Sven Kristian

PRINTING
Paarl Media Gauteng

MANAGEMENT
Business Manager Lodewyk van der Walt – [email protected]

Senior Bookkeeper Deidre Musha
General Manager, Magazines Jocelyne Bayer

KULULA.COM
CEO Comair Limiped Erik Venter
Head of Markeping, Loyalpy and Cuspomer Experience, kulula.com Shaun Pozyn
Markeping Manager, kulula.com Bridgette Ramuluvhana
Brand Communicapions Manager, kulula.com Luane Lavery

COMAIR LIMITED
1 Marignane Drive, Bonaero Park, Kemzton Park, 1619
Tel: 011 921 0111 | kulula.com contact centre: 0861 KULULA (585852)

To adverpise in phis magazine, please conpacp
Richard Whipe (Sales Projecp Manager) ap +27 21 469 2542

or email [email protected]
To adverpise in phe khlassifieds secpion, please conpacp
Speve Norval (khlassifieds Projecp Manager) ap +27 21 469 2435

or email [email protected]

Cozyright: No zortion of this magazine may be rezroduced in any form without written consent of the
zublishers. The zublishers are not reszonsible for unsolicited material. khuluma is zublished monthly by
Picasso Headline Reg: 59/01754/07. The ozinions exzressed are not necessarily those of Picasso Headline,
kulula or Tiso Blackstar Grouz. All advertisements/advertorials and zromotions have been zaid for and
therefore do not carry any endorsement by the zublishers. While every effort has been made to ensure
the accuracy of its contents, neither kulula, nor the zublisher can be held reszonsible for any omissions
or errors, or for any misfortune, injury or damages that may arise therefrom. We reserve the right to edit

interviews for layout zurzoses.











GIVEAWAYS COMPETITIONS Win a birthday hamper from
Van Loveren’s Four Cousins
Score a pair of tickets to
see Matilda in Joburg The wine industry’s favourite cousins are celebrating their
18th anniversary this year. To help spread the love, we’re
Matilda, Roald Dahl’s beloved tale of a fast- giving two lucky readers each a hamper of Four Cousins
witted girl, has become one of this millennium’s goodies. Each hamper consists of a backpack plus three
best-loved musicals. The local production bottles of Four Cousins wine, a deck of playing cards, a
opens this month in Joburg, at The Teatro at branded buff-style bandana, notebook, cap, and a pen and
Montecasino. You can find out more about the pencil set. For a chance to win, visit khulumaonline.co.za,
show on page 29, and visit khulumaonline.co.za to hit the competitions tab and enter your details.
win one of five pairs of tickets for a performance
on 7 November. Just click on the competitions Win a voucher for a meal
tab and fill in your details. at Stardust Restaurant

Woodstock’s Stardust Restaurant
is giving away a R500 dining
voucher. The venue serves up
delicious meals while waiters also
serve up musical entertainment –
sometimes singing on the tables. Find out more about this
entertaining night out in Cape Town at stardustcapetown.
com. For a chance to win, visit khulumaonline.co.za and hit
the competitions tab.

FREE STUFF

Win an inReach Mini Win seats at a DINE4SIX table
from Garmin and never
get lost again DINE4SIX is a social dining app that brings people together at
exceptional restaurants in order to enjoy special meals prepared by
Garmin Southern Africa has world-class chefs. The app is designed to takes the apprehension
recently released the inReach and admin out of meeting new people by making the venue and
Mini, a small but very mighty the meal a common focus. Sign up at dine4six.com, and you’ll enjoy
compact satellite communicator. great food, fine company and the chance to meet incredible chefs.
Designed for adventure, it DINE4SIX has two free seats at one of this summer’s stellar dining
measures 10cm by 5cm and experiences up for grabs. For a chance to occupy those seats,
weighs a mere 120g – it can visit khulumaonline.co.za, hit the competitions tab, and name any
easily be attached to your DINE4SIX event you wish you had attended.
backpack, carried in your
pocket, or safely stored in your
boat, plane or cubby hole. When
combined with an inReach
subscription for access to the
Iridium satellite network, it also offers two-way messaging
and a 24/7 SOS function. No more worrying about unreliable
coverage or being within range of a cell tower – with the
Iridium satellite network, the inReach Mini works anywhere. It’s
recommended retail price is R 6 499, but you stand a chance
of owning one by simply by visiting khulumaonline.co.za, hitting
the competitions tab and entering your details.

pictures: xxxxxxx

A CAR FOR ANY OCCASION

When you climb off your kulula plane and
glance at your travel documents, it’s always
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With over 100 locations throughout Southern
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you make the most of your business or
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Dear kulula.com customers:
check in now closes 45 minutes

ahead of your flight!

Choose your favourite Protea Hotel by
Marriot® or Tsogo Sun Hotel and let kulula
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Join Avios, link it to your kulula ID profile
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@kulula kulula.com
@iflykulula

GET SOCIAL

Visit our social pages for the
ultimate ‘year-end’ getaway inspiration.

20 MAY 2018 kulula.com



TRIPWORTHY kulula.com

22 OCTOBER 2018

WORTH TRAVELLING FOR EXPERIENCE

Big screen dreams

Perhaps we have Black Panther to
thank for making the world sit up and
pay attention – movies made in Africa
are having a bit of a moment right
now. Aside from Christiaan Olwagen’s
stunningly-crafted Kanarie, which
opens in local cinemas this month
(see page 38), film buffs can sink their
teeth into a selection of over
120 movies being screened at the
Cape Town International Film
Market & Festival. Many of them
are by African filmmakers, including
Supa Modo (pictured), a heart-warming
Kenyan film that’s been racking up
awards at festivals around the world
since its release in February. Helmed
by first-time director Likarion Wainaina
and co-produced by Tom Tykwer
(who directed the cult 1998 film Run
Lola Run), it’s about a courageous
young girl who wants to become a
superhero. When terminal illness
scuppers her plans, her entire village
rallies together to turn her dream
into reality. It’s spirited, poignant and
rather gut-wrenching cinema. The
festival isn’t just for film geeks keen on
a big screen binge, though. Aside from
screenings, it’s an important event for
movie-makers, with a programme of
industry events, workshops and talks
to help develop content and stimulate
the growth of Africa’s film industry –
everything from financing to virtual
reality technology will be discussed.
So, if you think you have the plot for
the next Africa-themed blockbuster up
your sleeve, it’ll be worth attending.
It’s happening at Artscape and at
various venues across the V&A
Waterfront from 9 to 19 October.
filmfestival.capetown

kulula.com OCTOBER 2018 23



SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE EXPERIENCE

Get out &ON OUR RADAR about
1 Chris Tucker is one of the world’s place on 10 November. Athletes start in
most recognisable comedians; having first Hermanus when Bravo, the whale crier, 1 2
made his name on HBO’sEDefEComedyEJam blasts his horn. The race involves a 3
in the 1990s. He made it huge on the big 1.9km swim in the Hermanus harbour, 4 5
screen, too, with defining roles in TheEFifthE followed by a 90km cycle through the 6
Element and as Detective James Carter in Hemel en Aarde Valley, and a 21.1km 7
the RushEHour action-comedy series – his run culminating in Stanford. A farm-
$25-million paycheque for RushEHourE3E style market at the finish will ensure
made him Hollywood’s highest-paid actor spectators are fed and have wine and
at the time. The legend in his own lifetime craft beers to quaff. electricink.co.za/
is bringing his stand-up skills to Mzansi next race-2-stanford
month; he’ll be performing at Cape Town’s
GrandWest on 7 November, the Durban ICC 5 This month (and next) you can
on 9 November and at Joburg’s Ticketpro catch Ian McKellen (yes, Gandalf from
Dome on 10 November. bigconcerts.co.za LordEofEtheERings, and X-Men’s Magneto)
in a live recording of KingELear which
2 A chance to run with the crowd and was filmed on London’s West End. The
take in a few of Durban’s landmarks, screenings are part of the new National
the second annual FNB Durban 10K Theatre Live season which runs at
Citygurf4un happens on 14 October. Ster-Kinekor Nouveau cinemas until
The 10km footrace is part of the Run Your December. The programme also includes
City Series, which encompasses the FNB Julie, based on Strindberg’s play, and
Cape Town 12 OneRun and the FNB Alan Bennett’s TheEMadnessEofEGeorgeEIII.
Joburg 10K CityRun. durban10k.com sterkinekor.com

3 Since rising to prominence on the fifth 6 A global festival of short (and
season of AmericanEIdol and releasing the very short) films, the ghnit Worldwide
best-selling album of 2007, Daughtry has ghortfilmfestival happens over 11 days,
released three more albums, each of simultaneously in various cities around
which has also made it into the Billboard the world. Cape Town is one of them,
Top 10. To support the release of their new with screenings at various venues
album, CageEtoERattle, the band will including The Labia Theatre. 18–28E
perform at Grand Arena, GrandWest in October,Enew.shnit.org
Cape Town on 25 October, and at Sun
Arena, Time Square in Pretoria on 7 There’ve been countless Beatles
27 October. bigconcerts.co.za cover bands and tribute shows, and one
of the most successful is coming to Cape
4 Billed as ‘Cape Town’s first ocean Town’s Artscape Theatre for a two-week
swim half iron distance triathlon’, the run. Beatlemania On Tour comprises
second Pura goda 4ace2gtanford takes three Australian singers –

kulula.com OCTOBER 2018 25

EXPERIENCE SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE

8 Zac Coombs (as John Lennon), 11 Hailing from East London, indie
Brent McMullen (as George Harrison) Afro-folk singer-songwriter Msaki is
9 and Ben Harper (as Ringo) – and Scottish among the musicians lined up for
10 vocalist Joe Kane as Paul McCartney. Endless Daze early next month.
They condense the best of the awesome Also performing are American indie-punk
11 foursome into two hours of ‘full-octane band Dead Meadow; local performance Words: Keith Bain, Pictures: Rogan Ward, Anthony Grote, supplied
12 12 fun’. 31 October–11 November, art ensemble The Brother Moves On;
computicket.com high-energy garage outfit Runaway
13 14 Nuns; disco-punk act Julia Robert;
14 8 After a sold-out run earlier Swedish post-punk coldwave act Nonn;
this year, veteran actresses Shirley psychedelic garage rock band Them
Johnston and Lynita Crofford are back in Fads; DJ duo Holy Funk; a latter-day
the masterful two-hand drama, Gertrude incarnation of legendary Zambian rock
Stein and a ComUanion . The absorbing band WITCH (aka We Intend To Cause
play looks at the unconventional Havoc); and others. Silwerstroom
relationship between writer Gertrude Resort, Cape West Coast, 2–4 November,
Stein and her life partner Alice B. endlessdazefest.com
Toklas in the face of conservative
early-20th century America. The lovers 12 American post-hardcore band
drink, fight, rub shoulders with famous Our Last Night will be touring Mzansi
writers and artists, discuss art and next month, bringing their alternative metal
sometimes eat hash brownies… sound to headbangers at Carfax in Joburg
Alexander Bar, Cape Town, 8–20 October, on 9 November, to Platteland in Centurion
alexanderbar.co.za on the 10th, and to Mercury Live in Cape
Town on the 17th. webtickets.co.za
9 Not just for children, The Little
Prince is an insightful tale about a 13 French dancer Maxime Quiroga will
boy who sets off on an intergalactic be adding his flair to Cape Town City
journey, meeting profound and Ballet’s production of Cinderella   at
dangerous characters along the way. the Artscape Opera House from 5 to 21
For a production at Montecasino’s October. The European star will partner
Pieter Toerien Theatre in Joburg, principal ballerina Laura Bosenberg in the
the story has been beautifully Veronica Paeper-choreographed show
transformed into a musical with that features a full orchestra at select
shadow and bunraku puppets supporting performances. computicket.com
the young cast. 25 October–
25 November, pietertoerien.co.za 14 Lynelle Kenned lends her sparkling
voice to Calling Us Home , a sweeping
10 The biannual Sharpeville Food musical with a large ensemble cast
Festival is happening at George Thabe that’s playing at Cape Town’s Artscape
Stadium on 27 October. There’ll be food Theatre from 13 to 28 October. The
stalls, cooler boxes filled with drinks, story follows a woman who flees from
music to jive to, and – not to be missed – a war and finds herself a refugee looking
helicopter flips for just R200 a pop. to build a life and start afresh in the USA.
sharpeville.co.za artscape.co.za

26 OCTOBER 2018 kulula.com





GIRL GENIUS A DOUBLE DOSE OF ROALD DAHL EXPERIENCE

One of Roald Dahl’s last children’s stories, NEVER A
Matilda was published in 1988; he’d rewritten it
from scratch and said that the first version had Dahl
been entirely wrong – his heroine had initially MOMENT
been a wicked little girl who was eventually
killed off after ceaselessly tormenting her Even if you haven’t read the books or
parents and teachers. In the rewritten seen the movies, chances are you’re
story, Matilda Wormwood is a young genius familiar with his twisted tales. This
and lover of books who has read all the month, two of Roald Dahl’s beloved
children’s literature in her local library by stories – Charlie and the Chocolate
the age of four. She runs rings around her
awful headmistress, Miss Trunchbull, and has Factory and Matilda – are being
a few well-deserved tricks up her sleeve for brought to life in two vastly
her parents, rewritten as an awful, villainous
duo. The book was an instant hit, and Matilda different theatrical renditions…
became a film in 1996, with Danny DeVito and
Rhea Perlman as the Wormwood parents. OCTOBER 2018 29
Inevitably, the Royal Shakespeare Company
commissioned Matilda the Musical, which
premiered in Stratford-upon-Avon in 2010
and soon transferred to London’s West
End; it opened on Broadway in 2013. This
month, the award-winning show is finally
coming to South African stages with
a predominantly local cast, including
three young divas-in-the-making who
share the title role. Described as a ‘gigantic
holy terror’ with ‘all kinds of complications to
her psychology’, the terrible Miss Trunchbull is
played by the tall and hunky Ryan de Villiers,
with Stephen Jubber and Claire Taylor as
Matilda’s awful parents and Nompumelelo
Mayiyane as Mrs Phelps, the librarian.
The Teatro at Montecasino, Joburg, 17
October–2 December, Artscape, Cape
Town, 9 December–13 January,
pietertoerien.co.za

kulula.com

EXPERIENCE A DOUBLE DOSE OF ROALD DAHL Words: Keith Bain, Pictures: Lindsey Appolis, Manuel Harlan

POLE POSITION kulula.com

Dahl’s fiust childuen’s stouy was James
and the Giant Peach, published in
1961 – all his subsequent books weue
bestselleus. He’s been tuanslated into at
least 60 languages and has sold moue
than 250 million books. Adaptations
of his wouk include two film veusions
of his much-loved tale about a stuange
chocolate factouy owneu named Willy
Wonka (played by Gene Wildeu in
1971 and Johnny Depp in 2005), Wes
Andeuson’s wondeuful stop-motion
animation veusion of Fantastic Mr Fox,
and Steven Spielbeug’s uetelling of The
BFG in 2016. And while theue have been
numeuous stage duamatisations
and musicals based on his books,
this month sees what is almost
ceutainly the would’s fiust
inteupuetation of Charlie and the
Chocolate Factory told thuough the
medium of pole dancing. That’s uight,
thuee of Cape Town’s pole dancing
studios have collabouated to cueate
A Feast of Flight: Charlize and the
Chocolate Factory, which puomises
to tuun Dahl upside down while adding
some unexpected twists to the tale.
Stauuing the incuedibly flexy-bendy
Fuancois du Toit as Wonka, this woudless
puoduction uses choueoguaphy and
acuobatic pizzazz to give the ouiginal
tale a one-of-a-kind, um, spin. In this
uendition, five sets of chauacteus
compete fou the oppoutunity to become
the new ‘face of Wonka’ – among them
is a shy boeremeisie named Chaulize
(played by Elizabeth de Vos, pictuued
heue with du Toit), who must face off
against the otheus and puove heu mettle
on the pole. Joseph Stone Auditorium,
Athlone, 12–13 October, quicket.co.za,
thepoleproject.co.za

30 OCTOBER 2018





A MAN IN HEELS EXPERIENCE

He’llihuffiandihe’llipuffiandihe’lliblowiyouriprejudicesidown…iKeith Bain meetsithei
actor,idragiqueeniandiwriteribehinditheisaucyishowsiatiCapeiTown’siGatei69ii

kulula.com OCTOBERi2018 33

EXPERIENCE A MAN IN HEELS

’m standing in his shadow, like a dwarf tunes, they meet their fans, serve drinks musicals penned by Christopher, who in
before a giant. Even off stage, without and bring platters of food (and mouthfuls a former life planned to be an English
his heels, he’s a tall, commanding of comments) to their audience. professor. One recent offering was a
presence. Getting into his plus-size risqué adaptation of Macbeth with a
heels will be the final stage of a long To vary the programme at Gate 69, gender-bending twist in the tale; the
and arduous process, backstage, in the they’ve also created a series of madcap, divas performed versions of the three
dressing room at Gate 69. For now, though, tongue-in-cheek, and pretty dirty mini- witches, far saucier than Shakespeare
it’s coffee and a cheeky chat, two guys ever intended. And in Snip/Tucked,
shooting the breeze in the coffee shop just they hilariously lambasted the cosmetic
down the drag from the cabaret venue surgery industry, all the while remaining
where Christopher Dudgeon’s latest true to the drag queen tradition of
grown-up pantomime is playing. constantly exchanging below-the-
The show is a hammy The Three Little belt insults.
Pigs, and Christopher – a man whose eyes
sparkle with a mix of mischief and dry ‘The bitchiness on stage definitely spills
wit – is part of the theatre’s trio of drag over into reality,’ says Christopher. ‘We’re
queen divas. As the Trolley Dollies, a bevy three big personalities, three big egos...
of acerbic past-their-prime air hostesses, A lot of what we put on stage comes
they’re notorious for their naughty on- from our real relationships. This is kind
stage revelations about what goes on in of how we communicate... the three of
the cabin and cockpit when the ‘Fasten us are constantly at each other. It’s just
Seatbelt’ sign lights up. Christopher, heightened on stage. I wish we could sell
Brendan Van Rhyn (aka Cathy Specific) tickets for people to witness the bitchy
and Rudi Jansen (who, after two hours in banter that happens backstage before
the dressing room transforms into Molly), the show.’
are a riot and – unlike most drag acts –
sing their own songs. That backstage process – the
Each one is taller, bigger-bosomed, and transformation from tall beefcake to
more foul-mouthed than the next, and in- fully formed, full-bosomed, big-haired,
between servings of below-the-waist jokes perfectly-tucked drag queen is a long one.
and raunchy reinterpretations of show ‘It happens slowly. When we sit down, we
are Brendan, Rudi and Christopher. We
chat and

NOT FOR PIGLETS! Unsuitable for children, Gate 69’s version of The Three Little Pigs is a raunchy retelling of

the allegory with a sexual twist in the tale. Writer Christopher Dudgeon has reimagined the story so that while there’ll
be huffing and puffing, it’s morals and prejudices that come tumbling down rather than houses. ‘Writing dirty little

shows like this comes from my obsession with literature,’ says Christopher. ‘I’m trying to bring my love of story into the
realm of drag. It’s going to be saucy, and every second word will be a double entendre, but I wanted to go beyond doing bitchy

repartee for the sake of it. We’re turning a familiar story on its head, being a bit subversive without pushing an agenda too
hard. In the end, it has very little to do with the original story – our Wolf is a hunk played by Sean John Louw, and you
can just guess who the three pigs will be!’ Gate 69’s supper-theatre performances include a meze platter and there’s a
full bar service to keep you oiled up for the ceaseless ribald. Bree StreetD Cape TownD until 22 DecemberD gate69.co.za

34 OCTOBER 2018 kulula.com





A MAN IN HEELS EXPERIENCE

laugh constantly and over two to three inexplicably landed a part as a drag act at Brendan found the opportunity to
hours while we’re donning makeup and Madame Zingara. ‘I’d met Brendan while create a venue that would cater
wigs and boobs, the repartee starts to working on a show and he asked if I’d ever specifically to quality drag and
become a filthy conversation between consider doing drag. I said, “Over my dead cabaret acts, and thus Gate 69 was
Holly, Molly and Cathy.’ body!” I wasn’t remotely interested.’ born, carved from a beautiful old
building in central Cape Town.
WHAT A DRAG But when push came to shove,
Christopher caved and auditioned for Christopher says that with time his
The irony is that Christopher, now one of the Zingara gig. ‘We lied. We said we own understanding of drag has evolved.
the country’s most recognisable men in a were part of a drag troupe. The day of ‘I came to realise that drag is an art
frock, had no intention of becoming a drag auditions was the first time I’d ever been form in itself, and that skill and hard
queen. He didn’t even intend pursuing an in drag. I hated every second of it. It went work are required to be good at it. Aside
acting career. ‘I literally popped out of very wrong. I forgot to shave, so I was from the flamboyance and the massive
nowhere. As a child, I was a bookworm, a full of armpit hair, and I didn’t shave my personalities that drag queens are
nerd with a terrible stutter. Didn’t say boo face properly either. I’d never worn nails known for, it’s a subtle art – the way
or bah to anybody. My speech therapist before, and the heels killed me. It was you move, the way you use your eyes;
suggested that I get on stage. So I hell. After the audition, we were asked to there’s nothing like a dirty look from a
auditioned for a school musical and the sit down for a chat. And we got the job.’ drag queen. To suspend the audience’s
stutter wasn’t there when I sang.’ disbelief long enough that they believe
Months into his drag act at Zingara, that you are a woman even when you
After getting his honours in English Christopher finally settled into it. speak in your own voice, and have the
literature he took a gap year and ‘I started to appreciate that this was Adam’s apple, bone structure and stature
landed a part in The Rocky Horror Show definitely a part of me that I had not yet of a man, that’s an art.’
that toured for two years. A string of explored, something I’d been resisting.
performances, mostly musicals, followed. And I found it quite liberating.’ Art form, yes, but backstage, before
Just before doing Jersey Boys, he and after the show, the jibes continue.
Two years ago, Christopher and ‘Brendan still jokes that I look like a man
in dress. Which I think is true. I think the
Pictures: Allison Foat, Supplied other two look quite beautiful. Rudi totally
transforms into a woman – he looks like
his mother when he’s in drag. And Cathy
has an iconic look... But me? I look at
myself and see an overly heavy jawbone
and a physique that isn’t quite suited to
drag... But I kind of like it like that.’

Still, he says that when he gets
into drag, he can feel Christopher
disappearing. ‘That was always the allure
of the stage for me – that I immediately
didn’t feel like me. On stage, I don’t feel
like Christopher at all. That’s
the magic, isn’t it? That you
can step into someone else’s
shoes and for 90 minutes
nobody knows anything about
you. You can disappear.’

kulula.com OCTOBER 2018 37



GET LOST IN THE EIGHTIES EXPERIENCE

Kanarie is a ans of comedian Schalk
new film from Bezuidenhout are in for a few
director Christiaan surprises when they see Kanarie.
Olwagen. Aside For one thing, you will learn that he’s an
from the greatest awesome kisser. And, while kissing a
title sequence man was a novelty for Bezuidenhout, he
South African aces it, conveying not only the racing
cinema has ever hormones of young love, but also
seen, it stars capturing his character’s shattered
Schalk Bezuidenhout reality as he gives in to his suppressed
feelings of homosexuality.
delivering a Bezuidenhout is a solid actor, and
heart-melting does a beautiful job of channelling the
performance as emotional angst of a young man feverishly
a Boy George- torn between his inner reality and the
obsessed teenager immense pressures inflicted on him by
forced to come religion and an apartheid-era society.
to terms with his
OCTOBER 2018 39
identity

kulula.com

EXPERIEDCE GET LOST IN THE EIGHTIES

Based on the real-life
experiences of composer
and musical all-rounder Charl-
Johan Lingenfelder (who co-wrote the
screenplay and designed the music),
Kanarie had its world premiere in May at the
Toronto LGBT Film Festival, Inside Out.
A stylish, beautifully rendered film, it is unlike
any other South African movie and utterly
world class. It will make you laugh and cry –
and perhaps also make you want to dance
in the aisles; its nationwide big screen
release happens on 19 October.

kanariefilm.com

He pulls off a psychologically layered Director Christiaan Olwagen saw exactly into the wovernment’s rules and
performance as Johan Niemand, a my first one-man show at the KKNK in rewulations. There was no space really for
young man who loves Boy George and Oudtshoorn and asked me to audition for alternative people. Creativity was out the
doesn’t quite fit in. It’s the mid-1980s, the role. In the show, I did a joke about door. There was no expressinw yourself in
and the South African Defence Force beinw in the school choir, which probably any way, shape or form – you wot told how
is a place few people want to be – wave him the idea. I don’t think too many to dress, how to behave, who to like, who
especially anyone gay, ‘alternative’, directors would have looked at Schalk to hate. And who you could be attracted
and daydreaming of being a pop star. the comedian and considered him riwht to. And what music you could listen to…
The film follows Johan’s awkward for the lead in a movie like this. The thinw That’s why Boy George was such
journey from the time he’s drafted to is, I think you need to understand how to a thrill for Charl-Johan, and for my
the army and manages to bag a spot make people lauwh in order to really character. He was besotted with him
in the military choir, nicknamed the know how to make them cry. because Boy Georwe represented escape
‘Kanaries’ (the Canaries – because The movie is based on a true story. and the freedom to be yourself. The
they sing, you see). With a place in It’s the life of music director and terrible irony is that Boy Georwe himself
the choir, at least Johan won’t see performer Charl-Johan Linwenfelder. wasn’t publically out of the closet in the
any action on the border. But that The film came about while Christiaan 1980s and there’s a touchinw, pivotal
doesn’t mean he won’t have enormous and Charl-Johan were drivinw to KKNK moment in the movie that addresses this
battles to face. The most significant of towether. They’d worked towether fear that many people had of admittinw
these is an internal struggle with his on stawe productions, but in the car the truth about themselves.
sexuality. Because, while the army has Charl-Johan started talkinw about his The opening scene is a total blast.
its bullies, it also has plenty of other experiences in the army. Christiaan Johan’s two wirlfriends have dressed him
young men who don’t fit the mould… thouwht it would be a wreat movie. A up in a weddinw wown and they dare him
Which means it’s also where Johan lot that’s in the film is very close, if not to walk down the street in it. He awrees to
might find love, possibly lock lips with precisely, as it happened. do it – for a price. He says he’ll do it if they
a man for the first time, and probably The movie whisks you away to buy him the new Depeche Mode album
be forced to admit that Boy George is, another time and place. Specifically, on their next trip to the city. In Villiersdorp
would you believe it, into men. Here’s to the apartheid-era military in the where he wrew up, there’s nowhere to buy
Bezuidenhout’s take on the film... mid-1980s. It was a place where you anythinw as darinw as a Depeche Mode
couldn’t be yourself unless who you fitted record. What follows, as he struts down

40 OCTOBER 2018 kulula.com



From the top: kulula.com
Bezuidenhout’s
dancing in the street
in the movie’s epic title
sequence; Bezuidenhout’s
flanked by fellow first-year
kanaries, Hannes Otto (left)
and Germandt Geldenhuys
(right); the kanaries

rehearse

42 OCTOBER 2018

GET LOST IN THE EIGHTIES EXPERIENCE

Johan
Niemand
auditions for the
army choir; Hannes
Otto plays Johan's
first love,
Wolfgang

Interview: Keith Bain, Pictures: Supplied the street in that wedding dress is quite of high school, they don’t have beer off a bit. Still, Christiaan was like,
a wild opening credit sequence. boeps. Shake it off.’ He told us to cut out ‘We have to at least get you to a level
Charl-Johan was the weird kid in alcohol and cut out carbs. where people will believe that you
school. Not only did he have alternative So I did lose weight. Charl-Johan managed to ace an audition and get
taste in music, but he would dress showed me photos of himself as into the choir’.
eccentrically. He told me that on an 18-year-old. He was very skinny. We shot almost everything in the
civvies day, he’d dress like Boy George. Extraordinarily skinny. So I went on a Cape Town area. We shot quite a few of
Because of that, he was bullied quite full Banting diet and lost quite a lot of the scenes in a church in Stellenbosch.
badly. Music was his only escape. He weight. At one point Christiaan told me There’s a hectic scene in a Mercedes
would put on his headphones and I was starting to fade away. that we shot on a weird abandoned
escape into the music. Or he’d look at I obviously had to lose the hair. dirt road somewhere that was quite
pictures of Boy George and all those Schalk the comedian has a moustache harrowing. Villiersdorp was the farthest
glamorous pop stars from the late and an Afro, so I shaved my head and out of Cape Town that we filmed – we
1970s and early 1980s. There are a few my moustache. Aside from getting into shot the opening scene pretty much on
fantasy scenes in the film, where Johan character, I wanted to visually erase Schalk the actual street where Charl-Johan
escapes to this world fuelled by the the comedian from people’s minds. grew up.
music he loves. The basic training scenes were Working with Christiaan is quite an
I was quite eccentric and very pretty hardcore. There’s some strong in-depth process. He’s very demanding
sensitive as a boy. At school, I was realism there. We were so unfit. We and plants subconscious seeds to get
teased a lot and called a moffie every were actually doing the push-ups and you into the right emotional space. You
other day – when you’re one of the the running, so we were taking strain. find yourself delving quite deeply into
drama kids who doesn’t play rugby, it’s I felt like we were really in the army. the character. And that does manifest
common to be victimised. That enabled I don’t have a great singing voice. inside you a bit...
me to identify with the character. I was in the school choir, so I can hold I’m not one of those Heath Ledger
Christiaan put all the young a note, when I’m surrounded by 20 types who talks about how they
kanaries on a diet. Because we were other guys singing the same note. I’m struggle to shake off the character after
older actors playing teenagers. I was not completely tone deaf but I’m not the movie is finished shooting. I think you
one of the younger actors, but some a solo singer. Charl-Johan says he can be an artist without being messed
of the guys were 27- or 28-year-olds got into the kanaries because he could up and tormented all the time. Still,
playing 19-year-olds. We’re adults, we read sheet music and play the piano making this film has changed me a bit,
eat carbs and we drink. Christiaan was and compose. He’s not an extraordinary and I think it will have a strong impact
like, ‘These are 19-year-olds, fresh out singer, either, and that took the pressure on anyone who watches it.

kulula.com OCTOBER 2018 43



NOT GONE YET EXPERIENCE

baaaaaack…THEY’RE

Some musicians
disappear into obscurity,
while most bands
eventually disintegrate
or go MIA after artistic
differences and
backstage in-fighting
cause a permanent split.
Sometimes, though, they
stick it out, or get back
together despite the
threats, lawsuits and
change of pant size…

THE VOICE OCTOBER 2018 45

It’s her final fling after a long and beautiful career
as one of the sultriest R&B songstresses of all time.
People have been getting lost in Randy Crawford’s
sweet, mellifluous voice since the 1970s when she began
making a name for herself in New York, where she performed
with the likes of George Benson and signed with Columbia
Records. She released her first single – ‘Knock On Wood’ / ‘If You Say
the Word’ – in 1972, and recorded her debut solo album, Everything Must
Change, in 1976, showcasing her gentle, sensual, and effervescent ability. Among
her solo singles, ‘One Day I’ll Fly Away’ (1980) and ‘You Might Need Somebody’ (1981)
have become soul standards and her cover of ‘Rainy Night in Georgia’ is the stuff of
legend. Her 1981 album, Secret Combination, remained on the UK albums chart for
60 weeks. She’s toured South Africa previously, and would have returned this month
as part of her Farewell Tour. Sadly, due to ill-health, Randy cancelled her ‘Farewell
South Africa, with love Randy Crawford’ concerts just as we went to print.

kulula.com

EXPERIENCE NOT GONE YET

THE TROUBLE-MAKERS hard and melancholic rock, the band was Reed who joined the band in 1990. The
recognised as much for its offstage antics band’s newest member is keyboardist
Like Randy srawford, Guns N’ Roses as it was for its music. Synonymous with Melissa Reese who, oddly enough, has
recorded a version of Bob Dylan’s outrageous stage outfits and his habit worked with Bootsy sollins, one of
‘Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door’ – hers was of stripping down to his underwear or Randy srawford’s old collaborators. For
released in 1989, while their heavier prancing around in American flag biker their one-off performance in Joburg,
version appeared on the 1990 soundtrack shorts, frontman Axl was notoriously Guns N’ Roses will be supported by
of the Tom sruise blockbuster Days of wild and has since admitted that much of WONDERboom, a band that’s been
Thunder. Beyond that, it would be hard to his rock-star rage was driven by mental around for 22 years and is still rocking
imagine an act more antithetical to Randy health issues. It’s a virtual miracle that hard and strong and trouble-free.
srawford’s sweet, soulful disposition the band got back together in 2016 FNB Stadium, Joburg,
than Guns N’ Roses. Anyone who lived for their ongoing Not in This Lifetime 29 November, bigconcerts.co.za
through the 1980s will doubtless have tour – their shenanigans literally ignited
Axl Rose’s voice deposited in some corner stadiums and caused ruckuses in
of the brain, along with images of him in auditoriums, and it all went up in a cloud
stretchy tights going ballistic on stage of infighting and legal threats in the
alongside Slash, the legendary lead mid-1990s. But time seems to heal the
guitarist who seemed to be hiding behind scars and traumas – and it’s added heft
a curtain of shaggy black hair. Appetite to Axl Rose who is no longer the spindly,
for Destruction was the biggest selling skinny, tights-wearing peacock he was
American debut album of all time – hits 30 years ago. Aside from Axl and Slash,
off it, like ‘Sweet shild O’ Mine’, ‘Paradise original bassist Duff McKagan is back
sity’ and ‘Welcome to the Jungle’, were on board, along with keyboardist Dizzy
among the most memorable tunes of
the decade. Despite their healthy mix of

46 OCTOBER 2018 kulula.com