Graduate On Time for Ph.D

After watching that heart-breaking documentary, I wrote this in my note book, ‘Every time you think
of giving up, think about the Palestinian man, who has never given up to date. Compare your upheals
to his and see if you dare to say, ‘I give up!’

Being a qualitative researcher, it sort of dragged the process further. I was too deep in the forest that
I could not find my way out. Nonetheless, the jungle was an amazing jungle. There was just too much
to explore especially on the development of the human minds and the human demeanors. It was
obnoxious yet rewarding at the same time. After I had finalized my analysis, I sensed that there wasn’t
anything significant in my findings. What contribution can I make out of this research, I lamented.
Later, I understood that my respondents were trying to tell me that what was said in the outside
world about them was not true at all. The pre-conceived claim was Malaysian undergraduates were
deemed not ready for autonomy or they did not have the attributes of learner autonomy. In my study
however, it was evident that Malaysian undergraduates did possess the qualities of learner autonomy.
In fact, together, they made a dynamic team. They grew wiser in their reflections, decision makings
and in their revisions; the abilities of learner autonomy that were useful in learning writing. It’s their
collaboration that played a crucial part in learning. I learnt so much from my respondents; I grasped
that one can never master all traits. One might be lacking in one quality but can be a champion in
many others. Hence, we should not be judgemental; instead we should be more supportive and
considerate.

After all was over, I came to know my real ability. I had a very low self-esteem, never confident of my
stance. I had to rehearse many times before a talk or a conference. Not wanting my piece of mind
to be heard; afraid of making mistakes or jeered at. Always had this feeling that nobody will listen
to you, you are not the ‘significant other’ as Vygotsky would put it. Loathed giving trainings and the
list goes on. But I have come to realize that I will never be perfect because I am just a human being
like you. The more I seek knowledge, the more inept I feel. The circle of knowledge quest will never
be complete as long as you live, and I will continue searching and learning.

Now, I can look back and laugh, ‘Hey, I was there!’ Despite the roller-coaster rides, it was a beautiful
journey that only those takers will understand. So come, board the ship and sail along. But be sure
to have a captain onboard. Bon voyage!

IRPoGhaKyaambpinutsiPAubladuulPlainha,nPgh.D
Bukit Coombe, Penang

G.O.T for Ph.D 189

PENGHARGAAN

Sidang Editor Buku GOT merakamkan ucapan terima
kasih dan penghargaan kepada Rektor IPGM, Timbalan
Rektor IPGM, Ketua Jabatan JKPP IPGM, Pengarah-
Pengarah IPG Kampus dan Pensyarah-pensyarah yang
terlibat atas kerjasama serta sokongan yang tidak ternilai
diberikan dalam penerbitan Buku G.O.T 2017.



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