LP Magazine Oct 2021

www.lifepositive.com
` 100
YOUR PERSONAL AND SPIRITUAL GROWTH COMPANION
ARE YOU A VICTIM
OF FOMO?
How to avoid the fear of missing out
PAGE 26
How not to destroy ourselves
PAGE 14
October 2021
Meet
Kalyaan Kumar Jain:
the one-stop solution to
life’s challenges
PAGE 39
Banish negative
thoughts
PAGE 46






Virtual is the new real
Dear Reader,
You hold in your hands the last physical copy of Life Positive magazine.
For the devout fans of Life Positive, who have been subscribing and gifting it to friends and family in the hope that it would change their lives for the better, this might come as a disappointment.
However, times have changed unprecedentedly, and we can no longer afford to stay in a bubble. The world is increasingly getting digitised, and everything is gradually shifting to online platforms, as most readers and consumers are more active there. Therefore, Life Positive too is going fully digital from now on.
Most millennials as well as Generation Z are living virtually these days, whether it’s reading, watching movies, eating, shopping, banking, paying bills, making friends, dating, forming communities, or even making money. In such a scenario, it only makes sense that we too adapt to the changing times and become more net-savvy and app-friendly. The pandemic and the lockdown only expedited what was inevitable.
Secondly, it is important that the readers get the latest stories and updates from the body-mind-spirit world faster, than having to wait for a month to read them, as the need for spiritual transformation was never greater than it is today.
The app and e-magazine facilitate this to a great extent. The Life Positive app is available on both Android and iOS, and subscribers can continue to enjoy our content on the app, website, and email as
before. We would keep adding new features to it gradually.
Enjoy the October issue, which is full of amazing articles, and do not forget to subscribe to Life Positive e-magazine. Wishing you a happy Pujo and Dussehra.
- Editor
LP mascot: Laughing Buddha
October 2021Vol. 25Issue 07
Chairman: Aditya Ahluwalia President: D R Kaarthikeyan Director: V Venkat
Editor: Shivi Verma
EDITORIAL
Correspondent: Navni Chawla
Chief Correspondent: Rishi Rathod (Mumbai) Graphic Designer: Sandeep Kumar
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losZ HkoUrq lqf[ku~%] losZlUrq fujke;k%
losZ Hknzkf.k i’;Urq] ekdf’pn~nq%[kHkkd~Hkosr!
May all beings be happy, May all be healthy, May people have the well-being of all in mind, May nobody suffer in any way. — Vedic prayer
Edited by Shivi Verma. Printed and published by
Aditya Ahluwalia on behalf of Life Positive Pvt. Ltd. from F1/9, First floor, Okhla Industrial Area, Phase - I,
New Delhi-110020
Printed at M.P. Printers, B-220, Phase 2 Noida, 201305 Member, Indian Newspaper Society
4 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


Do you have health issues?
Friends, how many of you have sat in a bullock cart? Have you seen the scars on the back of the bulls which pull the cart?
Yes, they are the result of the whip used by the cart driver to strike the bulls. For years the cart driver whips the bullocks without thinking of the harm caused to the animal. The wounds gradually become impressions and then into permanent marks.
Well, we too whip over internal organs by our ‘breath.’ If you notice the breath; it grows heavy when your heart is heavy.
If you are angry, the breath works like a bellow, if you sob, the breath sobs; if you crib, the breath cribs and it starts whipping the organs inside the body.
Breath sets into a pattern according to one’s nature. If you are a man of temper – the breath burns the body. If you are a woman of tears, the heart becomes heavy and your sorrows, temperaments, and moods decide the pattern of your breathing. Similarly if your nature develops a regular upset mood; so does the breath.
Below are some examples which will give you an idea of what a sick breath can cause.
From The book on healing:
1. Lower back ache: Caused by years of mental worries over money matters
2. Hardened arteries: Condemning others or a rigid mind
3. Bent or stooped back: Suppressed anger
4. Cancer: Bitterness and unforgiveness
5. Constipation: Possessiveness
6. Cough: Often irritated by others
7. Feet ache: People who wish to fight their battles without help
8. Rheumatism: Stiff mind not willing to change with time
9. Stiff neck: Tense person
10.Hoarse voice : Trying to convince when you are yourself not convinced
11. Blind: Not wishing to meet anyone
12.Breaking of bones: Those who do not bend before others
These are just a few defects of the mind which set the breath into a pattern that harms us internally. Do not let your mind brood for long nor hate someone
forever, neither be angry for long nor dislike others forever.
Friends, a healthy mind leads to a healthy breath and a light breath translates to a healthy body. Next time, I shall write about your date of birth and your nature.
Swami Radhikananda
For guidance or discourses
9511602400
Website: www.maakundalini.com Email: [email protected] YOUTUBE: swami radhikanand


26
LEAD STORY
Out of the rat race
FOMO, or ‘Fear of missing out,’ is becoming increasingly common. Let us learn from those who have not succumbed to this malaise
says Jamuna Rangachari
14
HEARTSPEAK
Weapons of self-destruction
Ganesh Pai explains how ego, anger, and fear can sabotage our life and why we need to triumph over them
20
SELF LOVE
As free as the fishes
After a visit to her doctor, Rashmi Sundaram discovers the joy of loving herself unconditionally
06 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021
COVER STORY


39
SPECIAL FEATURE
A gift from an angel
Shivi Verma gets a distinct experience of the angelic realm after she meets Kalyaan Kumar Jain, a famous life coach, energy healer and an angel therapist
46
AWARENESS
Say no to negative thoughts
The author suggests ways of overcoming the debilitating tendency of succumbing to negative thoughts, says AVR Rao
51
FOOD
Veggie is the way
Make the most of the sheer abundance of variety and nutrition available in an Indian plant-based diet
says Naini Setalvad
REGULAR COLUMNS
Response 08 Mandala 10 Aha Moments 44
Sharing 56 Mudra 58 Journey 60
Spirit 63 Banyan Tree 64
Cover photo: Adobe Stock, Photo credit: Adobe Stock, Cover design: Sandeep Kumar
Total pages 68, including the cover page and the back cover
Contents 07


RESPONSE
www.lifepositive.com
YOUR PERSONAL AND SPIRITUAL GROWTH COMPANION
THE POWER OF A SIMPLE MIND
PAGE 26
How to ask the right questions
PAGE 10
` 100
September 2021
What has sex taught me
PAGE 15
Find your
own path
PAGE 51
Ask and you shall receive
Anouchka Blessed’s article published in the September 2021 issue of Life Positive was a sheer joy to read. The writer’s sensibility and perspective, both are praise worthy. It also marks the profound internal growth of a person. The idea of asking the right questions is scintillating. I thoroughly loved and enjoyed the way Anouchka embraced all the aspects of taking responsibility and true self-enquiry, leaving no room for any doubts or ambiguity in the reader’s mind about her subject. I am sure many would benefit from her article.
Meenal, PHD, Mumbai
Brave heart Indira
I was awestruck by Indira Ahluwalia’s story told in the close-encounter- Of faith, hope, and courage in the September 2021 issue of Life Positive. How can anyone not be inspired and moved by her journey? What courageous a fight put up against Cancer! Truly, hats off. I am so grateful to Life Positive’ for bringing to us stories of people like her. They make me feel even more grateful for my health, family, comfort, and life. Such interviews remind us to snap out of all that we take granted for, almost every day. I am actually
looking forward to read her book, Fast forward to hope, after reading about her. Her inner strength and exquisite will to live is contagious.
-Manan Sharma, Indore
Good-bye Shame!
Let’s talk about sex is one honest article, and I applaud the uninhibited spirit of Ajay Kalra as a writer. I could relate to it very much and agree on many things written in it. The two things that will always stay with me from this article are: Purpose proceeds pleasure and accepting my sexual self without any shame, for it is the part of who I am and my creation.
Mihir Advani, Kolkata
Life is simple and beautiful if you are
What an inspiring lead story, A simple mind. Although it spoke of something we all know about but still reading it gives a new dimension and depth to the concept of simplicity. A certain kind of clarity and peace was dawning upon me as I was reading this article. I would like to congratulate the writer and the editor for making us feel what you felt while putting it together. It saddens me to know that LP magazine is discontinuing its physical magazine November
08 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021
Mail from our readers, online fans and subscribers


onwards, although I am a lifetime subscriber and will get to read it digitally, I am going to miss the joy of holding its precious pages in my hands. I hope the physical copies of the Life Positive magazine are revived soon and may this blessing return back to us in its full might and glory.
Ankit, Mumbai
Feeling abundant- a choice!
I was overwhelmed reading the spirit column, Feeling abundant by Suma Varughese. I have struggled with scarcity mindset and feeling insecure especially in matters related to money. First of all, I would like to appreciate Ms. Suma’s sincere honesty because of which I and many more could learn from her immensely. The valuable lesson of having an abundant mindset can be life-changing. Her article comes as a reminder to all of us that feeling full and abundant from within is always a choice as abundance is the very nature of the universe we emerge from. So, thank you Suma ji, thank you LP for making me feel that I am abundant and I will always have more than enough.
-Jagruti Avasthi, Surat
Commendable article
In the article Yoga for You, featured in the September 2021 issue of Life Positive, the author Mrs. Vanitha Vaidialingam has ventured to bring out the nuances of the four major paths of Yoga, vis-a-vis the fruits of pursuit of each path.
It was highlighted that while Bhakti yoga depicts the yoga of ‘pure love’ for the Divine, Raja yoga is the yoga for ‘mind control’, Karma yoga is yoga of ‘action or selfless service’, and Jnana yoga, the yoga of ‘knowledge’. The final attainment in these paths was also enumerated.
The takeaway from the article is that these paths of yoga can be practised singly or in combination and there remains no rigid walls between them. It purely depends on the individuals to decide which one suits them.
This revelation by the author takes away the doubts lingering in the readers as to which path to tread on, to reach the goal of self or god realisation.
Enjoyed reading the article. Thanks to the editor for bringing out this in Sep 2021 issue of your magazine.
Piravi via email
Response 09


MANDALA
10
LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021
Diverse therapies under one roof
Continua Kids is a centre for neurotherapy and all other kinds of therapies for uniquely abled kids. It was started in December 2016 by its founders, Dr Puja Kapoor, a paediatric neurologist, and Dr Himani Narula, a developmental and behavioural paediatrician director. The main purpose of forming this organisation was to take care of children with special needs like ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder), autism, cerebral palsy, etc. At this place, therapies like occupational therapy, speech therapy, physiotherapy, ABA (applied behavioural analysis) therapy, and special education are used to help these children fit well with their peer age group. Dr Puja says, “Earlier, after a diagnosis was made, the parents would run from one therapy centre to another with the child, which was a struggle. This whole system was very scattered. It was also difficult for us to keep up with the further assessments and to monitor the child’s progress. And so, we thought of finding a more viable way of bringing all the experts together under one roof by creating one common therapy centre controlled by us so that the development of the child can be monitored by one team of doctors and therapists through proper case records in place. This led to the conception of Continua Kids.”
The founders also say that some of these children have ‘savant skills,’ which makes them sharp, fast learners, and have high IQs, and are skilled but lack the ability to make normal social conversations. In the training process at Continua Kids, each session with one personal therapist attending to the child is normally conducted for 45 minutes followed by a 15-minute counselling session with the parents, imparting them the mental resources
they’d need to understand and help their children better.
Dr Himani says, “We only use scientific evidence– based therapies to determine the present developmental status of the child and then plan an early intervention course that addresses physical, cognitive, and social communication and self- help skills of the child. Our vision is to nurture skills in children so that they can come at par with their peers. We want each and every uniquely abled child to be more accepted in society. A lot of times, parents are in denial of the diagnosis of their kids or are themselves struggling with their own issues that went untreated. They require extreme support in order to be more accepting and understanding of their children’s needs. I conduct a 45-minute detailed counselling session for the parents about the prognosis and also give them home programs.”
Continua Kids has centres in many cities across the country. They have expanded a lot more, even globally, through online sessions. They have a Continua Kids app too, which is very helpful for parents to make direct appointments with doctors, look at the red flags, track milestones of their children, read blogs, etc. They also conduct live Facebook sessions every Saturday, which are educational, and awareness programs for parent groups for different problems. They try to talk to large audiences in person or online at one time to answer their questions and make the parents more equipped to deal with their situation.
www.continuakids.com
01244000055 • [email protected]


Sri Vidya Mahayaga
Ancient Indians were known to believe in the efficacy of yagyas (fire sacrifices) to invoke the blessings of gods and change the energy composition of a particular space. Knowers of this science have decided to take recourse to this practice to balance the negativity which is currently engulfing this world.
Shakthiveda Wellness Mission, a charitable trust founded by Rishidev Narendraji in 2006 in Bengaluru, is currently performing a Sri Vidya Mahayaga for 2880 hours under the leadership of Matha Dr Sripriya, the prime disciple of Narendraji, affectionately called ‘Amma’ by devotees. The yagya commenced at 4 a.m. on August 17, 2021, and will continuously be performed till 4 a.m. on December 21, 2021.
In addition to performing mahayagas that go on for a long period unceasingly, for the upliftment of humanity, the mission also conducts research on energy aspects related to the human body, cosmic and subtle energies, and their effect on individuals to provide spiritual solutions to the miseries of the people. Rishidev Narendraji, who is a graduate in mechanical engineering,
is the purest and most uncontaminated element of life left on this planet. Shakthiveda fire rituals are simplified, and anyone can perform them irrespective of caste, creed, or religion. These fire rituals bring inner purification, environmental purification, happiness, and harmony with nature. In mahayagas, a number of medicinal herbs are used as oblation material, and through their continuous usage for a long period, the environment and nature are cleansed. Since we are part of nature, it helps in the wellbeing of mankind and other elements of nature. Positive changes in the environment have scientifically been recorded during Shakthiveda Bhaishajya Mahayagams, each of 81 hours duration.
Srividya Mahayaga, which is currently in progress, is being performed for health, wealth, family harmony, interpersonal relations, and spiritual empowerment of the people, giving them the strength they need in these difficult pandemic times.
People contribute to them by donating ghee, wood and herbs. At Shakthiveda, one can avail a free photo analysis by sharing their name and photo at 9900198585. The root cause of their suffering and the associated solution
will be explained.
Website: https://www. shakthiveda.com/
Phone: +91 74837
53687 (Tamil, Kannada & English), +91 86605 17237 (Malayalam &
and his prime disciple, Matha Dr Sripriya, are involved in research activities related to energy aspects for over three decades and have given
a number of wellness measures for spiritual empowerment, health,
wealth, knowledge, and interpersonal relationship
aspects to the seekers.
Rishidev Narendraji, discovered that the human energy field comprises 56 intelligent cosmic energy components. As per Shakthiveda,
English) Email:
gmail.com Matha Dr Sripriya
swmission2007@
fire
Mandala 11


Project Milk Bag
Rarely picked by rag pickers due to the low resale bins, mugs, and buckets.
value, milk bags often end up in landfills and water bodies due to poor disposal. Three ladies—Hansu Pardiwala, who runs a social enterprise called Har Ghar Hara Ghar, which focusses on Waste Segregation Awareness & Training; Kunti Oza, who heads Clean Mumbai Foundation that has been working in the field of Waste Management since 1990; and Chitra Hiremath who is an alumnus of Xavier Institute of Mass Communication with 25 years of experience in Executive Search and HR— came across a WhatsApp message that made them think deeply. It was a simple message requesting people not to snip off the corners of milk bags while emptying them, as these little pieces of cut plastic find their way into the drains and waterways, thereby affecting marine life. It was this message that got them thinking that this is something everyone can do with little or no effort on their part.
Their main challenge was space to store the collected milk bags and convince people to clean the
bags and hand them over
to them. It took them a
lot of effort and time to
do that, but now, most
people are sending
them clean bags! In
fact, there’s a lady
from Chembur who
used to come in a
taxi every two months
with 5–6 kg of bags she
had collected from her building. Such people’s commitment kept them going. All the bags are upcycled to make
Their dream is to have the Milk Bag Project running in all metro cities and all two-tier and three-tier cities. They would like to mentor people to set this up in their own areas. Essentially, the Milk Bag Project is here to help us recycle our milk bags. All we have to do is clean, store, and courier the milk bags to their collection centre.
After hearing about this initiative, my husband and I too have started doing this as a small step to help the environment. All it takes for us in Bangalore is to courier the bags every month after collecting them so that they can be recycled. Is it not said that each step does make a difference, and if it involves just keeping aside a packet a day by all of us to save the environment, we all can surely join in this initiative.
This initiative reminds me of the Zen fable where a monk picks up each fish and throws it back into the sea after a storm. When told he cannot save all the fish in this manner, he responds that it does make a difference to each fish he is able to save. We too can make a difference with each milk packet, isn’t
it?
Please email
themilkbagproject@ gmail.com to know where to send your bags from wherever you
may be currently. —Jamuna Rangachari
The three crusaders of change
12 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021




HEARTSPEAK
Weapons of
14 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


self-destruction
Ganesh Pai explains how the ego, anger, and fear can sabotage our life and the world at large and why we need to triumph over them
G ently walking past a few short trees with leaves touching my face, I sat on the steps overlooking a quiet pool. Setting
aside dry leaves lying around those steps, I was beginning to immerse in tranquillity. It was post-lunch free time in my spiritual retreat, where we would stroll around the resort to explore the greenery in all its abundance. Sitting there, I was observing a thought parade in my mind. That is the beauty of free time post the sessions. My guru, Mahatria, calls it ‘seep-in time,’ and rightly so. When learning meets our prior experience, profound wisdom emerges from this confluence. It was as if I was mimicking a stone statue of a man deep in thought right in front of me near the pool. I was experiencing one realisation after another, till the most profound one surfaced: it is easy to change the world but difficult to change myself.
Heartspeak 15


The paradox that is man
Man is a mystery unto himself. He knows smoking is dangerous but still indulges in it. He is aware of the benefits of healthy living but still cannot embrace them. He wants to experience silence but still cannot make time for meditation. The problem is not ‘out there.’ It is ‘right within.’ I started dwelling a bit more and pushed myself to think of those negative emotions severely shrinking our potential. Why is it so difficult to change ourselves? How can we conquer these one at a time? Let us make a start.
Ego
The ego makes us believe we are second to none, we are invincible, and we know it all. How many times does the ego raise its ugly head planning to script our downfall? The ego can blind us to the possibilities that exist in life. It can alienate us from the people around us. Some tend to justify their ego as ‘being
confident.’ However, there is a difference between confidence and ego. Confidence is born out of competence, while the ego is born out of arrogance. It takes a reality check to understand we are not as good or as important as we think. We need to be humble while pursuing our aspirations. Learn from all and learn all the time. Success is fleeting and can sow the seeds of self-destruction. When we are at the top, we tend to act like we are invincible. We throw humility out of the window. Sadly, we fail to realise that we can ill afford to be egoistic as the stakes are much higher. Any error of judgment fuelled by the ego can make us bite the dust. Hence, it is important to be sober, open-minded, and have a noble purpose of making a difference when we succeed. Let us crush the ego before it crushes us
Anger
The Buddha said, “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing
16 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021
Refrain yourself from taking any action or saying anything while you are angry. Let us give ourselves adequate time for the emotions to settle down. Once that happens, objectivity is back in the foreground; we can assess the situation and react with all the intellect and resources at our disposal.


it at someone else; you are the one who gets burnt.” Anger not only leads to self-sabotage by adversely impacting our health but also destroys beautiful relationships that have taken ages to build. In a fit of mad rage, words tend to come out faster than rational thoughts. The extent of damage it inflicts in the process can be unimaginable. We all deserve peace in our lives.
How can we fight against anger? We will not talk about any advanced solution. A simple prescription would be inaction. Refrain yourself from taking any action or saying anything while you are angry. Let us give ourselves adequate time for the emotions to settle down. Once that happens, objectivity is back in the foreground; we can assess the situation and react with all the intellect and resources at our disposal. Anger conquered is a danger avoided.
Fear
If there is ever a self-limiting emotion, it must be fear. Well, fear has various variants. For some, it could be the fear of failure; for others, it could be being judged or the fear of death. If we pause and ponder for a while, we tend to paint most of our worries as fears. These are just nothing more than a mental projection of the worst possible outcome. So many opportunities are lost, decisions are not made, and life is not lived to the fullest potential because of fear. It is time we take comfort because most of our fear tends to border on speculation. Most of the things we fear rarely happen. In the worst case, if our fear comes true, it does not mean we cannot make the counter choice. We can always bounce back from any setback. The best way to deal with fear is to take it head- on. Address matters causing fear upfront, and then go on to live fearlessly. It is worth
Heartspeak 17


Opportunities are lost, and life is not lived to the fullest potential because of fear. remembering Mahatria’s advice: Face the fear, it goes; avoid the fear, it grows.
Spreads like a cancer
Left uncontrolled, these weapons of self-destruction can turn into weapons of mass destruction. History is replete with instances where these negative emotions have caused havoc in the lives of people. We must reign over these and keep them in check. Anybody can demonstrate an occasional act of victory over these dreaded emotions. True glory lies in attaining mastery over them. We all are designed for greatness to make an impact in our lifetime. It has been my constant quest to drop the ego, overcome anger, and be fearless, thereby fully experiencing the life I truly deserve. It is time to surrender these weapons of self-destruction.
We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article. Mail us at [email protected]
18 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


BEHOLD
I STAND AT THE DOOR AND KNOCK
IF ANY MAN HEAR MY VOICE AND OPEN THE DOOR I WILL COME
IN TO HIM, AND WILL
SUP WITH HIM, AND HE WITH ME.
PSALM 122
The peace of Jerusalem
A song of degrees of David.
1. I was glad when they said unto me, Let us go into the
house of the LORD. Is 2:3; Zech. 8:21
2. Our Feet shall stand within thy gates, O Jerusalem.
3. Jerusalem is builded as a city that is compact together:
See 2 sam, 5:9
4. Whither the tribes go up, the tribes of the LORD, unto the
testimony of Israel, to give thanks unto the name of the
LORD. Ex 23: 17; Deut. 16:16; Ex. 16:34
5. For there are set thrones of judgment, the thrones of the
house of David, Deut 17: 8; 2 Chr. 19:8
6. Pray for the peace of Jerusalem: They shall prosper that
love thee, Ps. 51: 18
7. Peace be within thy walls, and prosperity within thy
Palaces.
8. For my brethren and companions’sakes, I will now say,
peace be within thee.
PSALM 121
Help form the LORD
A song of degrees
1. I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, form whence cometh
my help. Jer 3:23
2. My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and
earth, Ps. 124:8
3. He will not suffer thy. foot to be moved: he that keepeth
thee will not slumber. 1 Sam 2:9; Ps. 127:1; Is 27:3
4. Behold, he that keepeth Israel Shall neither slumber nor
sleep.
5. The LORD is thy keeper: the LORD is thy shade upone
thy right hand. Is. 25:4; Ps. 16:8
6. The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moom by
night. Ps. 91:5; is. 49:10
7. The LORD shall perserve thee from all evil: he shall
preserve thy soul Ps. 41:2
8. The LORD shall perserve thy going out and thy coming in
9. Because of the house of the LORD our God I will seek
thy good. Neh. 2:10 Prince of Peace
from this time forth and even for evermore. Deut, 28:6
Ask - Received Seek - Find Knock - Opened
INTERNATIONAL MINISTRY OF MINISTERS
LT. COL. SELLARAJ JOHN (NADAR) HONORARY DIRECTOR 195, 2ND Floor, Pragati Apartments, Club Road, Paschim Vihar, New Delhi Phone : 25211371, 25217399 Email : [email protected]
RIGHTEOUSNESS EXALTETH A NATION


SELF LOVE
As free as the shes
After a visit to her doctor, Rashmi Sundaram discovers the joy of loving herself unconditionally
20 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


I push open the white iron gate that leads collection, then pick one and start reading. But
to a small garden, and my eyes scan the
emptiness of the place. I step back to check the nameplate: Dr Sunita Patel. I redial the last call on my cell phone to notify the doctor of my arrival. She disconnects the call with an SMS: “Please be seated. I shall see you shortly.”
I stroll around, noticing it’s unlike any other clinic I have visited in my life, and feel mesmerised by the simple yet heavenly feel of the place. The boundary wall is lined with tall trees, and the cool breeze has a calming effect on me. The leaves rustle rhythmically, and some small shrubs add to the rustic beauty of the place. They seem to be untouched, free to grow. I look up to see a squirrel run up and down one of the trees. Below the tree is a playful cat. The effect of this place is magical. Everything is so wild, yet perfect. Confined inside a bungalow garden, yet so natural. I feel my head clearing up.
Childhood memories surface
I peep into a natural miniature pond full of a variety of tiny colourful fishes. Instinctively, I place a finger on the glass: my trick for befriending fishes. After about a minute, when not even a single fish comes towards me and as I am about to move my finger away disappointedly, a bright silver dollar slowly heads towards me and starts poking at the glass from the inside. I just ‘caress’ it. It’s an amazing feeling, which I had not experienced in a long time. After a few seconds, some more fish come towards me.
I see a colonial bench in one corner. Behind it on the wall are open stone shelves, filled with books. Normally, I would first scan the book
today, I don’t feel like it. Instead, I sit on the bench and indulge in enjoying the simplicity and natural feel of this place.
Therapy session #1
I am startled by the sound of the door opening. A soft, welcoming voice greets me: “Hello, Rhea. Sorry to keep you waiting. Please come in.”
I notice that the arrangement inside is equally welcoming. Is this a clinic? I wonder. Dr Sunita settles on the couch opposite me. She is as calm as the aura of her house. Her vibe makes me feel comfortable and relaxed immediately. On my way to the clinic, I had run over the conversation many times in my head, doubting whether I would be able to explain it to the doctor, unsure if I should even be visiting a doctor for such a trivial thing.
“Yes, Rhea. Tell me, what brings you here?”
I freeze. My mind is blank. My palms feel sweaty. And then, without a thought, the words just pop out of my mouth. “I have this weird feeling most of the time.” I pause, lost for words.
“What feeling?” Dr Sunita tries to probe.
I start fidgeting with the strap of my handbag. “Oh, God. This seems tougher than I thought it would be.”
“Go on. Try to describe the feeling.”
“I feel . . . weird, sometimes . . . not always; actually . . . most of the time. It’s difficult to explain.”
self love 21


The only person who has the power to trap you is you. Imagine a caged bird: All her life the bird dreams of flying in the open sky. And on the last day of her life, she realises that the cage door was always open. The bird simply had to step out of that little door and fly.
“ Try not to judge or think too much. Just let your thoughts flow. We will figure out the feeling.”
“I can’t pinpoint it exactly. My husband is a great guy. We have an amazing kid. I am happy to be working. Sometimes I feel low. I know it’s normal for everyone. The problem is not ‘feeling low’—it’s not knowing the reason. I have . . . mood swings, and I fail to understand it.”
Dr Sunita nods, which is an indication for me to go on. Her eyes are on me constantly, trying to read the unspoken words. Her look seems to penetrate deep into my soul. She seems to focus on the underlying emotions.
“I want to know what this weird feeling is? I want to get rid of it.”
“Can you tell me your routine?”
I fail to understand. What’s my routine got to do with this? Still, I go on to tell her my routine.
“You are a mom, a homemaker, work with your husband, multitask a lot. Great. Tell me what do you do for yourself?”
“Sorry, I did not understand that question? Everything that I mentioned, I do for myself.”
“Is it? Think about it. From what you just told me, I didn’t come across a single thing you do for yourself. Let me put it this way. What are your hobbies? How often do you socialise? By socialising, I don’t mean going out with your family. I mean stepping out with your friends.”
“My hobbies—I love reading. I do have my close group of friends.”
“Great. So how much time do you invest in reading every day?”
“I can’t, every day. I just have too many responsibilities.”
“How often do you catch up with your friends?
22 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


“Once in a couple of months, sometimes longer than that too. Everyone has their own schedule and—”
“What stops you from reading or meeting up with your friends?”
“As I mentioned earlier, I have to be there for my son, do things at home, in the office. Similarly, my friends have their responsibilities.”
Dr Sunita cuts me off. “Think about what I asked you? Let me put it differently. Who or what stops you from doing things you like?”
I stare at her blankly. I don’t have an answer. No one is stopping me.
“If you step out once in a while and meet friends for lunch, will it really affect your work? Or on a weekend, let your husband take charge, and you pursue a hobby.”
“I have not tried this in the last 10 years.”
“You should. It’s important.”
Therapy session #2
After a week, I visit Dr Sunita again. While I wait for my turn, I spend some time near the fish tank, repeating the same finger trick I did last time. While I enjoy the fish coming close to my finger, my mind lines up all the things I am excited to share with Dr Sunita. After my first visit, I met my friends for dinner, bought some books that were on my wish list, and started reading again.
I am so engrossed in my thoughts that I don’t realise when Dr Sunita comes out and stands behind me. I turn back startled. “Hello,
Doctor.”
“Hi, Rhea. You like fish aquariums?”
“Oh yes, I do. They have a very calming and meditative effect on me. I can watch them move around for hours.”
Dr Sunita smiles. “Come in.” Like last time, she takes her place on the couch, and I sit on the chair opposite hers. She waits for me to settle but doesn’t say a word.
I assume she expects me to talk, and with so much on my mind, I part my lips to talk. But, instead, I cover my face with both my hands and cry. After about a couple of minutes of venting out, I look up, wipe my tears, and say, “I don’t know what’s wrong. I had no idea I would cry. I am sorry.”
Dr Sunita gives me some time to compose myself as she hands me a box of tissues placed on a small table next to me.
It takes me a few minutes to steady myself. “I have had a wonderful week. In fact, there were so many good things I want to tell you about. I have started reading. I went out with my friends. After my last visit, I went home and told my husband about the session. He said I should plan to go out for dinner with my friends the same night. ‘Tonight?’ I asked. ‘But I haven’t planned anything. The cook is on leave. I need to make dinner. It’s a working day. Tomorrow is school. Moksh needs to be put to bed by 10. My friends can’t just come out like that.’ My husband replied, ‘Relax. We can order food. I am here for Moksh. Try calling your friends.’
self love 23


“I went for dinner and had an amazing time. When I came back, Moksh was asleep. My husband was watching TV. He looked at me with a smile. ‘How was dinner?’ he asked. I just hugged him and began to cry. He had no idea why I was crying, neither did I.”
After narrating the whole incident, I just look at Dr Sunita for answers. Maybe she can tell me why I was crying when I should be happy.
“How do you feel? Why did you cry that day? And what made you cry now, Rhea?”
“I felt stupid. For all these years I was not letting myself take a break. I felt guilty if it ever even occurred to me. I think I have found a word to describe the weird feeling I had— ‘trapped.’
With a smile, Dr Sunita continues: “Don’t be so harsh on yourself. Only you are stopping yourself. The house will be fine, your son will be fine, so will your husband and office. You need to feel good first. The only person who has the power to trap you is you. Imagine a caged bird: All her life the bird dreams of flying in the open sky. And on the last day of her life, she realises that the cage door was always open. The bird simply had to step out of that little door and fly.”
“You are right. That’s exactly how I felt. Trapped. And I am solely responsible for that feeling.”
We chat for a bit. When my session is over, I get up and walk towards the door. “Thank you, Doctor.”
Dr Sunita smiles and says, “Pick up a fish jar or a tank on your way home. It’s the little things in life that matter the most. Do a lot of similar little things that you enjoy. You will definitely feel better, and eventually, you will set yourself free.”
She hands me a small card. It has the image of a cherry blossom. A carefree girl is sitting on a swing made of a tyre, tied on the tree with a rope. Her hands are gripping the rope tightly, her body weight slightly pushed backwards, hair blown by the wind, a content smile on her face, feet stretched out for balance. I look up at Dr Sunita.
“Turn it.”
I turn it. “I choose to love myself unconditionally in each and every situation and see this as my most important responsibility towards myself.”
“Believe in it. Implement it.”
24 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021
We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article. Mail us at [email protected]


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LEAD STORY
26 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


Out of
the rat
race
FOMO, or ‘Fear of missing out,’ also referred to as MMS (May Miss Out), is a real phenomenon that is becoming increasingly common and can cause significant stress in our life. Let us learn from those who have not succumbed to this malaise but, instead, followed their heart says Jamuna Rangachari
Lead Story 27


At some point you just have to let go of what you thought should happen and live in what is happening
T he main issue most of us have is finding the purpose of our lives. This we often do by seeing what others are doing and try to see where we could fit in. Earlier, it was our classmates, relatives, or neighbours; now, it is the entire world, as we all are connected through mass media and social media. We see someone vacationing in exotic locales and fear we might never be able to realise this dream. We see another one scaling up the corporate ladder and wonder if we have wasted our life as a homemaker. We see people partying like crazy and think we are
missing out on all the fun. The list continues.
While it is good to know what is happening, it is foolish to think we need to be part of everything. This is where we need to find out what is real and relevant to us.
Bengaluru-based Supraja Mark (name changed), 46, joined an MNC Bank as Supraja Desikachar in 1996. She did pretty well in her career and also fell in love with her colleague Mark. They were sure of their choice and convinced their parents for their marriage
although they were from different religions. After marriage, Supraja continued working and had two children.
At one stage, she wondered if taking so much stress handling both the fronts, the office and home, was worth it. She quit her job in 2001 and became a full-time homemaker and mother who took care of all her children’s needs. Her children are now balanced adults and Supraja has blended wonderfully in Mark’s home while Mark has completely blended in her family.
“I realised that being content and happy is what I should focus on, and so I made my own choices,” she says. She believes that she is extremely lucky to be in a home that focusses on remaining content and happy with whatever one is blessed with. Regarding missing out on a career and a professional identity, she says, “Being a mother who has done her best is the best identity one can aspire for.” As far as her me time is concerned, she reads, writes, and is a published author with a few prizes under her belt.
28 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


There is a Kannada proverb, paalige bandhidhu panchamrutha or sikkidhu seerunde, oondone jana which, when loosely translated, means being content with whatever is given to us, accepting it as a blessing. Supraja considers this her benchmark for life.
Where does FOMO (Fear of missing out) come from?
Most malaises in society come from thinking or perceiving something in a way which is not factual. Much before the internet, Leonardo da Vinci had said, “All our knowledge has its origins in our perceptions.” Now, with social media being a part of almost everyone’s lives, this has created an artificial, virtual world that many of us are grappling with. Here, the fear of missing out refers to the feeling or perception that others are having more fun, living better lives, or experiencing better things than you are. It involves a deep sense of envy and affects self-esteem. It is often exacerbated by social media sites like Instagram and Facebook. Everyone, including children, often think others are having a better time. FOMO is not just the sense that there might be better things that you could be doing at this moment, but it is the feeling that you are missing out on something fundamentally important that others are experiencing right now. It can apply to anything from a party on a Friday night to a promotion at work, but it always involves a sense of helplessness that you are missing out on something big.
The fact is that the only thing that actually matters is our own life, and while we can observe others and pick up what we need to, obsessing with all that they seem to be doing can only be detrimental. We can see that often, when one encounters difficulty, one gets to know what reality is.
Ramdeo Choudhary, an entrepreneur turned spiritual seeker, who is currently based in Vrindavan, was directed to take his wife to a doctor in 2013. He was then in Bangalore and took her to the Narayana Health City hospital for a general check-up. After doing the preliminary tests, they were asked to undergo oncology tests, after which she was diagnosed with cancer. He says, “Friends and relatives started visiting my house to console my tearful wife. I used to counter this by dancing before them in a lighter mood, telling them that everything will be alright soon.” He sent all the details to an American doctor who okayed the treatment being given to her, predicting a
Ramdeo Choudhary
Lead Story 29


Leonardo da Vinci had said,
“All our knowledge has its origins in our
perceptions.” Now, with social media being a part of almost everyone’s lives, this has created an artificial, virtual world that many of us are grappling with.
lifespan of a maximum of three years in her case. Ramdeo decided to not let this prediction affect his wife’s mental health. He started exchanging spiritual thoughts with her by writing them daily on a piece of paper and discussing them with her during their morning tea. He also intensified his Kriya Yoga practice to find new thoughts to convince her about the immortality of the soul regardless of the perishability of the body. She returned these to him, requesting him to print the thoughts in a book and distribute it for free to cancer hospitals in the country. To his wife’s delight, he agreed, got it printed, and distributed it to all major hospitals. The book, Spiritual Exchange: A Milestone in the Treatment of Cancer was very well received, and a Kannada version of the book was requested as well from the readers. An eighty-five-year-old lady was kind enough to translate it into Kannada, and the book got praise and acceptance from several cancer patients.
Six years passed, and even the doctors were surprised to see Subh Laxmi Ramdeo (his wife) lead an active life even though her liver, bones, and glands were infected with cancer. After six months, Ramdeo had a dream that he must shift to Vrindavan along with his wife. He discussed this with her and Subh Laxmi gladly agreed, thinking more about the freedom from visits to hospitals and putting a full stop to huge expenses. They consulted famous oncologists, who suggested not to give even a needle prick to her body and let her live without treatment, as she had far exceeded their prediction. In a planned way, they shifted to Vrindavan despite opposition and tears from family members.
In Vrindavan, they used to walk to a nearby ISKCON temple which was two kilometres away. This continued for more than a month. Then she was unable to walk, and they used to visit the temple by autorickshaw. When she became too weak, she was taken to Bangalore for treatment, where she passed away. After performing her last rites, Ramdeo came back
30 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


to Vrindavan to spend his life in full devotion to Sri Krishna and has been living there for two years now. With absolutely no qualms about his choices, he says, “It appears that my wife came with me to Vrindavan to lay the foundation of my stay here. She trained the maid-cum- cook to prepare our favourite dishes as well as do the laundry and the overall cleaning of the house. My fourth book is halfway through and should get printed this year. Now HE only plans, and I execute as HIS servant. This is how I enjoy His company!” Ramdeo’s life is an example of making life choices independent of what others would have done and thus finding a true goal for one’s own life.
Knowing what one wants
Anasuya Devi Rejeti from Mumbai thought that everything in her life was perfect until she felt that something was missing somewhere. She shares, “As a little girl, I had my life’s goals sorted: I was clear that I wanted to become a good homemaker like my mother and make a difference in people’s lives through philanthropy and social service like my father.” Soon, she found something she loved. She stumbled upon mathematics, a subject dreaded by most, and fell in love with it, not just reading and solving maths problems but teaching it too. She says, “I wouldn’t miss a single opportunity to teach maths to my friends, juniors, and cousins. That ultimately led me to the discovery of my passion for teaching. However, none of her topper role models and friends chose teaching as a profession, and they all went for the glamourous corporate life instead. Since she didn’t want to miss out on that life, like them, she too chose her career based on the perception that all toppers pursue science and work for big companies.
Soon, however, things changed. “After the birth of my first child, I realised that I had
Anasuya Devi Rejeti
deviated from the goals I had set as a young girl and was pursuing everything on the basis of not missing out on things. So, I decided to leave the glamorous corporate world and the associated perks that come with it (money, recognition) and chose to spend valuable time with my children, just like my mother used to with me and my siblings. I believe that the most important thing we can give to our kids is TIME,” she says.
This decision also led her to ponder, again, the goals of her life. She started taking mathematics classes for secondary and senior secondary students. “I soon realised that a lot of the basic mathematics books were not conceptual at all, and this affected the foundation of many students; so I decided to write concept-based mathematics books for young kids to help
Lead Story 31


them build a sound foundation for higher studies.” These books were widely appreciated. Later, she started conducting educational workshops in schools and learnt that children from underprivileged backgrounds were facing challenges coping with regular education and decided to join an NGO to help the kids realise their potential.
Whenever she used to meet her schoolmates and friends, they used to tell her that she was missing out on life and wasting her talent by not being productive. Initially, she felt they were right, but she never let this get to her because she had chosen goals based on her priorities, and her decisions were not influenced by anyone. She just followed her heart. She realised that working for a good cause and giving back to society was her ultimate joy, so
reinforcing this life goal kept her from feeling that she was missing out on anything.
Today, the three M’s—mathematics, music, and meditation—are her life mantras. Extremely happy and content, she says, “I thank the Almighty for giving me the strength to stay strong and true to myself, and so many opportunities to learn, grow, and give back in my little ways.”
Serving others always does make us happier in the journey of our lives.
Aligned with a life purpose
Vikas Luthra from Chandigarh started his professional life as an engineer. One amongst many in the sea of engineers, he was somehow not satisfied with his life. Things were as
32 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021
Vikas Luthra: finding his soul purpose in rescuing animals


Many people spiral into depression and sadness when they think their lives are inadequate compared to the lives they see on social media. Many holidays and material things that you see being flaunted on social media are sponsored or free gifts and not really earned
mundane as could be. A keen observer and highly sensitive at heart, he would often nurse injured animals whenever he spotted one on the street. To him, he was not doing anything special but just fulfilling his duties as a responsible citizen. However, as time passed by, he became more aware of the increasing incidence of cruelty, indifference, and apathy towards animals, and a lack of basic civil sensibilities among people. He also realised there were people who wanted to help this cause but did not know how. This is when he decided to leave his job and devote himself fully to the cause of animal welfare.
Some eight years ago, a few months after he had moved to Chandigarh, he began rescuing animals and started tending to their medical and other needs, at an individual level. Today, he has gained goodwill in the Chandigarh Tricity area, which includes Chandigarh, Panchkula, and Mohali for his sincere nature and humane work for the voiceless.
Though, to begin with, he did not have a sound financial backing or a blueprint for the future, what he surely did have was a conviction that this was a cause that needed full-time attention and engagement. With this clarity of thought and a lot of affection in his heart, he founded the Furever Friends Foundation, registered as a not-for-profit company at Zirakpur, with nothing but a team of animal- loving volunteers and a vision to promote peaceful coexistence between humans and animals. The foundation is currently run by volunteers who believe in the vision and focus on rescue and rehabilitation of community animals in Chandigarh, Panchkula, Mohali, and Zirakpur. They also promote the fostering of animals and adoptions, in place of buying them, because they sincerely hope to provide a loving home to all such animals who either lost one or never found one.
While his story is nothing short of inspiring, more so, it is his simple yet thoughtful ideas that never cease to surprise those around him.
Lead Story 33


Most of us are part of not just one but numerous social media platforms. It could mostly be out of FOMO. We do not want to be left out or considered ‘asocial.’ Even kids as young as four or five have their own social media presence these days, so this problem can start early.
He also has to his credit many other thoughtful ventures like The StressBusters—an army of therapy animals to shower those in need with their love. He runs a Mobile Vet Clinic/ Ambulance Service for animals to provide first aid within the golden hour of injury.
Last year, when the pandemic had started taking an ugly turn and resulted in a nationwide lockdown, he started an initiative to help feed street animals who were mainly dependent on leftovers and thus were badly hit when everything shut down.
This year, once again, with the humungous rise in COVID-19 cases and an atmosphere of fear in the society, Vikas and his band of indefatigable volunteers started an initiative to support COVID-stricken families and individuals who were in need of food. As a part of this initiative, all they ask is for anyone interested to prepare two additional portions of meals, simple daily meals that one cooks for
themselves, and package the same hygienically for the patients in disposables. This way, the patients get homemade food, and even the contributors do their bit without the hassle of stepping out of their own homes. In a similar vein, they have also started an initiative to provide an immunity-boosting free nutritive diet for COVID patients. And every once in a while, to keep the spirits of COVID patients high, they make frequent visits to hospitals and facilitate laughter and yoga therapy.
It is not that his personal life has been smooth. Vikas was diagnosed with malfunctioning kidneys about four years ago. And yet, despite a painful session of dialysis twice a week, nothing has stopped him from fulfilling his calling and selfless service to animals. These animals have given Vikas a purpose to live and smile against all odds. “I feel I am not missing out on anything as these animals give me more love than I can ever imagine,” he says.
34 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


Complete wellness
Luke Coutinho is a wellness coach of repute. He says, “Fear of missing out is becoming a real cause of anxiety today. The problem stems from the fact that everyone today is trying to be perfect and happy at all times, and if that is something they aren’t able to achieve, they feel left out. Most of us maintain a false facade of happiness when, in reality, we have several other emotions going on within us which lead to dissatisfaction and anxiety.
Also, the overexposure to so much content on the internet, which is exacerbated by social media platforms and people showing the best side of their lives, can lead to this paranoia and sense of helplessness that we are missing out on something big—a promotion, a vacation, a party, or a commodity that someone owns.
Most of us are part of not just one but numerous social media platforms. It could mostly be out of FOMO. We do not want to
Luke Coutinho
be left out or considered ‘asocial.’ Even kids as young as four or five have their own social media presence these days, so this problem can start early. The whole trend on social media about teaching coding to kids even if they truly aren’t interested in it is also nothing but FOMO in new age parents.
Luke suggests the following measures to not succumb to FOMO:
Stop comparisons
Comparison is the thief of joy, happiness, health, self-worth, and so much more. The moment we begin comparing our lives with others, we start to feel empty, hollow, and unhappy. The only way out is to stop comparing ourselves with others. We don’t know what others’ struggles are, and at the same time, we are missing out on acknowledging all that we have. Comparison is the opposite of feeling grateful. It comes from a mindset of scarcity. Develop and build an attitude of abundance instead. You can still intend for all that you want, but in that whole process of wanting more and more, do not miss acknowledging and being grateful for what you already have, because your life could be someone else’s dream.
Know that social media life is VIRTUAL
Social media is a boon and a curse. It depends on what you use it for, how you use it, and how much you use it. Many people spiral into depression and sadness when they think their lives are inadequate compared to the lives they see on social media. Many holidays and material things that you see being flaunted on social media are sponsored or free gifts and not really earned; so, know that as well. Everything you see does not have to be real. The lives of most people appear like they have done well, but a lot of them are living off their
Lead Story 35


People mostly project the best side of their life on social media which may not be the actual reality
parents’ wealth, living in the homes of their parents, flaunting clothes, jewellery, and cars that don’t really belong to them. A lot of people own material things on loan, which, in a way, is not really theirs until they pay off the loan. It’s easy to take loans and show the world a life that is not real.
Be real, be YOU
Having a bad day? Accept it with grace. It is okay to have a bad day. Take some time off to sit with your feelings and reflect on what lessons you can take away from this. Comparing yourself with others, especially when you are having a bad day and asking Why me? will only put you in a victim mode. The only way to process your emotions is to allow yourself to feel a feeling completely. Be you, be real. Don’t try
to be someone you aren’t. That’s such a heavy and draining thing to do. Also, stay grounded. When you are grounded, nothing that happens in the outside world can affect you. Cultivate a beautiful inner world for yourself.
Choose wisely
Taking decisions is part of life, and for that, we need to trust our own selves more than anyone else. No decision is 100 per cent foolproof. Every choice has its pros and cons. One should, of course, weigh them before making a choice. Everyone feels anxious now and then. For example, we may worry when faced with a problem at work, before taking a test, or before making an important decision. Occasional anxiety is all right. But anxiety disorders are different. They’re a group of mental illnesses
36 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


that cause constant and overwhelming anxiety and fear. Excessive anxiety can make you avoid work, school, family get-togethers, and other social situations that might trigger or worsen your symptoms. In the case of FOMO, one of the common problems now, getting in touch with reality is the main thing we should aim for and move towards.
Social media often makes us ponder over many ‘what ifs.’ What if I had done this or not done this? is a common question we ask ourselves when we see others living the life we could not. This is a useless question to spend our valuable time on. As far as decisions are concerned, once they are made, one should never look back, for that is an older chapter. Even if our choice did not work the way we wanted it to, we need to face the consequences and stand strong.
There are always many things in our lives to be happy about. We need to concentrate on the positives and remain happy. Even if one is not happy and content, one can begin all over again as life is a journey, not a destination. The
main change is that whatever happened earlier is an experience, not a permanent part of life. We can always make new choices and start afresh knowing what is real for us and stick to our goals to remain content and happy. This is the main gift we can give ourselves as we have the power to make our own choices regardless of what others are doing or pretending to be doing.
Here, the main factor is knowing that what is eternally real is one’s inner self. We may make it stronger in whichever way we want, but one thing which can stymie its growth is the fear of what others may think or what one may be missing out on. If in earlier times, it was the fear of what people would say which determined our life choices, today, it is the fear of missing out on many desirable things. Either way, it is listening to others and not to our own selves. We as human beings have the power to think for ourselves. The sooner we are able to do this and remain connected to our inner self, the better our life shall be.
We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article. Mail us at [email protected]
Lead Story 37


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SPECIAL FEATURE
A gift from an angel
Shivi Verma gets a distinct experience of the angelic realm after she meets Kalyaan Kumar Jain, a famous life coach, energy healer and an angel therapist
Special feature 39


My first celebrity encounter happened when at an exhibition, Hindi Film-maker Farah Khan rushed to my stall, found the meeting with me to be effective, and followed up again
Last month I met Kalyaan Kumar Jain, a life coach and energy healer in my office in New Delhi.
This wasn’t the first time I was meeting him. I had met him once in a workshop on forgiveness organised by GL Sampoorna in Coimbatore. I distinctly remember him as one of the most enthusiastic and energetic participants of the workshop. Therefore I was looking forward to this meeting.
I was feeling very confident as I met him since I derive my strength from my inner work and feel pretty well connected to the Source.
However, no sooner had Kalyaan – a man bursting with energy and dynamism – placed himself beside me, he asked me what made me wear two crystal bracelets on my left hand. I told him that they were gifts and that I wore them for ornamental reasons as they went with most dresses I have in my wardrobe. He asked me if he could check them. Feeling sure that they were in fine fettle I gave both of them to him. He fished out a small pendulum from
-Kalyaan Kumar Jain
his pocket and began to revolve it over the bracelets. It came to stand still after a while. I wasn’t surprised, but Kalyaan said that the purpose of these bracelets was long over and they were dead from within. They have absorbed whatever they had to from my mind and were no longer functional. He advised me to expose them to a full moon night to purge and reactivate them.
Acknowledging blockage
Next he said that I had a lot of stuck energy and if his wife was around she would have helped me emotionally release those feelings.
I was perplexed as I did not feel anything of the sort. Rather I had been feeling very happy about some of my new projects.
Pretty soon a few other colleagues joined us and we started talking. However slowly I began to feel headache and tension build in my body. As though pent up feelings were surfacing.
I intuitively felt that somehow Kalyaan’s angels were facilitating the release. I realised
40 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


that plenty of struggles that I had been facing over the past three months (Covid, mother’s accident, loss of house helps) had taken a toll on my mental and physical health, and I had been suppressing these exasperating feelings, projecting that I could bravely deal with anything life threw at me.
A change in direction
I had to admit that I did need some help. After this, he entered my cabin and said that I needed to change the direction of my seating and use colours like pink and green more in my outfits and my surroundings. He also insisted that I keep the picture of my guru in my room. (I used to keep it, but had to remove it after the pandemic and lockdown made it impossible for me to pay obeisance to him every day in my cabin.)
He also drew some cards and predicted a couple of things about my future. Though reluctant at first, his advice began to filter in my mind after some time. I recharged my bracelets, brought my guru back to my office and began to choose pink and green clothes over my favourite, black, red and earthy tones.
This had an immediate effect on my mental state.
As my guru’s image returned to my table I began to feel an upsurge in positive energy in my heart. I felt supported and protected.
Shedding the load
Later, during one of our interactions he also said that I needed to shed everything that was burdensome in my life.
This I took much longer to understand because in my mind I was doing only the needful and there was nothing unnecessary in my life. For
Kalyaan Kumar Jain
the longest time, I could not fathom what he was hinting at. Then suddenly on September 6, I got a huge epiphany that I was taking on more work than I should and even working on other people’s behalf. This needed to stop. The realisation hit like a thunderbolt. I immediately went back to setting things back in order.
An angel endorses
Furthermore, a strange serendipity confirmed that I had made the right decision. No sooner had I communicated to my team that I would focus only on my work and not taken on extra responsibility, than a bird-like apparition (I saw the flight, but not the bird) entered my room, dropped a tiny, fuchsia pink portulaca flower at my feet and flew away. I was struck by this occurrence. I picked up the flower, put it before the picture of my guru and thanked the angels for being there to guide me. Even my father who is a doubting Thomas could not deny the divinity of the incident.
Special feature 41


The TOVAA workshop happening across India
is a one stop shop for all kinds of space, colour, numbers, energy, directions, aura related healing. Kalyaan amalgamates many healing modalities into one structured curriculum and a single system or workshop. This reduces the need to run to different astrologers, vaastu experts, colour and crystal therapists for your life problems.
I strongly felt that an angel had visited me. I realised that I could not let Kalyaan go like this. I fixed an interview with him to find out more about this fascinating person.
Below is a glimpse of his life journey as shared with LP correspondent Navni Chawala.
The story of Kalyaan Jain
One out of the nine children, Kalyaan Kumar Jain was always very unconventional and unique. From the very beginning he would question all the norms. Being well taught and read, he was exceptionally good at teaching and communicating. After he lost his father at 14, Kalyaan started taking tuition classes for younger children to support his family like a responsible son would in such a situation.
Within a time span of two years, they prospered and became very successful in Mahim, Mumbai. Alongside, he also taught English, history, geography, and economics in a school.
Such was his luck during that time, anything he touched turned into gold.
Later as he grew up and got married, he along with his wife Reetta Jain opened a home school and a hostel in Panchgani, a hill station near Mumbai. Soon, he also started a boarding school, called JK high school in the same town. It saw a humongous growth in a span of eight years, with the student count going from 26 to 274 students.
The twist of fate
However, Kalyaan was hit hard by life again when his mother passed away in 2010. This was a major turning point in his life. A huge emotional crisis erupted in front of him. It led to many changes in his life both internally as well as externally. He was called from within to discontinue his school and move onto the next thing that was required in his soul journey.
“I felt called from inside to do something with
42 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


parents, exploring the emotional dynamic between them and their children. I also decided during the same year to take a sabbatical year, away from work and my family,” he says.
During this time, his life was all about man’s search for meaning in life. “I went from church to church, dargah to dargah, temples to temple trying to find the ulimate divine connection and salvation,” he recalls.
At this point, angels swooshed in, in his life, as was destined. He was drawn towards the spiritual realm and angels. Intuitively, he was called to strengthen his bond with the angelic realm, learn more about them and their world, and be guided by them.
This marked the beginning of his Angel therapy journey. He and his wife are both ‘Heal your life’ coaches and spiritual practitioners. He has sharp clairvoyance and claircognizance, to the extent that he has predicted events before they actually occurred.
“My first celebrity encounter happened when at an exhibition, Hindi Film-maker Farah Khan rushed to my stall, found the meeting with me to be effective, and followed up again,” Kalyan happily recalls.
He became quite sought after among celebs when the word about his astute knowledge and bang on intuition spread like wildfire. This was followed by one celebrity encounter after
another and he became a force to reckon with in the healing circuit.
The birth of TOVAA
Not to forgo this opportunity to team up with Kalyaan in order to benefit the readers of Life Positive we collaborated with him and laid the foundation for TOVAA (Teachers of Visualisation and Affirmation).
The TOVAA workshop happening across India is a one stop shop for all kinds of space, colour, numbers, energy, directions, aura related healing. Kalyaan amalgamates many healing modalities into one structured curriculum and a single system or workshop. This reduces the need to run to different astrologers, vaastu experts, colour and crystal therapists for your life problems. The experience of TOVAA is illuminating and empowering giving the much needed boost to a person’s life, as testified by many participants of the first TOVAA workshop batch which happened in Mumbai a few days ago.( Check the Life Positive Facebook page for more information.)
TOVAA is being organised in Mumbai, Kolkata, Bengaluru, on 12, 19, 26 September and Delhi, Indore and Chennai on 3, 10 and 17 October respectively.
It’s a great opportunity to learn esoteric knowledge and change your life for the better. Do not miss it as the angels are hovering around you waiting to be called in.
We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article. Mail us at [email protected]
Special feature 43


AHA-MOMENTS
God & Me
Forging a bond with God has allowed Megha Bajaj to handle the ups and downs of life more gracefully
Ilove people. I love the negative emotions.
able to meet all expectations. I realised I would never be able to please everyone outside of me, but I could certainly feel very one with the God within me.
The God within me has become my compass to decide how I relate with the world. I simply sit, in silence, and ask questions that may be on my mind. I receive the most beautiful and pristine answers. Always.
The world outside will be fluid. Chaotic. Sometimes celebrating you. Sometimes questioning you. Sometimes so perfect. Sometimes so imperfect. Sometimes just what you want and sometimes far away from it. However, I realised I no longer need to go through all the mixed emotions or highs and lows. Rather, I can enjoy all the relationships by getting this one most important relationship built.
Which has been with me,
Within me,
From the time I was born.
And will walk the journey with me, till my last breath.
God & Me.
Megha Bajaj is a bestselling author, film script writer, and poet.
An ardent seeker at heart, she also runs her online writing and healing workshops called WoW. You can read more about her on www.MeghaBajajWoW.com.
We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article. Mail us at [email protected]
relationships. Simply put, I
love to love, and be loved. Little things are not little for me. I find myself mesmerised by a tiny gesture of unconditional love. A call where true conversation transpires means so much to me. A smile, with tears, says more than words ever can. I can keep smiling for hours, feeling one with my world.
With so much depth, there also comes sensitivity. When someone misunderstands my intention or judges me, especially if I hold them in a very special place in my heart- it causes tremendous hurt to me. I find myself numb and unable to move.
I would go into a mode of self- doubt: Why, after all this, did he say that? Why would she feel like this? Why did he do this? How do I handle it? It used to be paralyzing for me, as with deep love, there also comes deep hurt.
Relationships must be a source of celebration—not disturbance. And, if I am honest, most people love me much more than I can comprehend. Why then do I need to go through these ups and downs? Also, why do I need to explain or prove myself so much? Each of us are what we are- sometimes beautiful, sometimes not, sometimes giving, sometimes demanding, and everything in between. But I can anchor myself into something and not go through
Somehow, I made a pact with God that day and said, “God, Life is going to be between you and me. First. And then with me and everything and everyone else.” God to me, is my inner world, my conscience, my best friend, the enlivening force, the one who is so close to me; He needs no explanations.
I started investing more time in my aloneness, feeling closer and closer to life in its entirety. Celebrating myself for all that I did right. Gently correcting myself where I went wrong. Growing in love, in respect, with me and in intimacy with God within me.
A beautiful thing happened. The more I had a healthy and beautiful relationship with God, the less anyone outside caused hurt in me. I could enjoy all the beautiful emotions of a relationship and yet not get bogged down by the expectations or explanations.
I realised I used to waste so much time explaining my actions or inactions to people. I stopped doing that and allowed my God within me to tell me if I am on the right path. Sometimes it does upset people, and that’s okay. The closer they get to me, they understand that even if my action is not to their liking, my heart is in the right place. And I wish to give this freedom to myself as well as others. None of us will ever be
44 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


LEARN THE LANGUAGE OF FREQUENCY
We generally believe that planets or numbers impact us. But in reality, we are impacted by multiple energies and frequencies.
Do you wish to decode the secrets of these elements?
Then join TOVAA®
(Teachers of Visualisation and Affirmation)
A special module created by Life Positive with celebrity life coach Kalyaan Kumar Jain
In this workshop you discover how your well being is related to the frequencies of colours, numbers, directions, space energies, and planets that rule your health, wealth, relationships and destiny.
Do you know these elements are influencing your every thought, intention, word, and action?
Do you know you can use an elevated understanding of these very elements to transform your life as well as your loved ones?
If not then register for TOVAA
Get ready for the BIG LEAP!
1 Day Workshop Places and Dates:
Kolkata - 19 Sept Sunday Bengaluru - 26 Sept Sunday Delhi - 03 Oct Sunday Indore - 10 Oct Sunday
8 day training & certification course only in Bengaluru: 23rd Oct to 30th Oct, 2021
To know more visit: https://lifepositive.org/product/tovaa-introduction/ Or call/WhatsApp Rrishhi Rathod: 63640 67604.


Say NO to negative thoughts
Negativity, at some time or the other, attacks all of us. Prof. AVR Rao elucidates its mechanism and suggests ways of overcoming this debilitating tendency
AWARENESS
Comparison
Guilt low self- esteem
fear
Confusion
Shame
self-criticism
lack of faith
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R arely do we find a human being who one or more of the kind of thoughts mentioned
has never had negative thoughts.
Negative thoughts are creeping fears, including those about things presumed to be hidden in the future and concealed in people, which take various shapes and attack us any time. It is the tendency, in some people, of expecting the worst. Paradoxically, when these thoughts are analysed and understood, it will become clear that there is no depth or stuff in them. They disappear like an iceberg in the hot sun.
Negative by nature
Very rarely do these negative thoughts originate from external causes. Your wrong interpretation of the external events and people gives birth to negative thoughts and strengthens them, often forcing you to believe them to be true. Some external causes are ill-health and physical weakness, situations of deep and unexpected grief, being a victim of great injustice, attacks of wicked but strong people, and so on. These can be won over with some effort and positive thought enforcement.
It is the other kind—the internally generated or imagined ones—that should bother you. Negative thinking is virtually self-talk which limits your ability to trust yourself and strengthen your potential virtues. Thoughts direct and control your behaviour and, therefore, their quality is of extreme importance.
Understanding
Understanding negative thoughts is the first and essential step for banishing them from your life pattern. Whenever you are confronted by
below, understand that you are being pushed into the bottomless pit of negative feelings:
• I am alone in this world and so helpless that there is no help during difficulties.
•The whole world is full of wicked and deceitful people, ready to pounce on me and finish me off.
• I am not strong like them but weak, inadequate, and helpless.
• Compared to others, I have no achievements in life but only a series of failures.
• I do not deserve to be among people of repute and fame.
• I can never succeed in any project. I am born to experience continuous failure and will never succeed in anything.
• I lack concentration and cannot do anything right.
Negative thoughts may, therefore, be understood as cognitions about the self, others, or the world in general, characterised by negative perceptions, attributions, and expectations, which are generally associated with unpleasant emotions and adverse behavioural, physiological, psychological, and health outcomes. The difference between positive and negative thoughts is identical to that of divine and diabolical tendencies.
Ill effects
An unbridled flow of negative thoughts is indeed the fiercest enemy sitting inside and posing as a friend. It induces the victim syndrome in you,
Awareness 47


In due course, unchecked negative thinking forms into a habit and reduces your natural ability to think logically, reason effectively, and retain useful and happy memories. Negative thinking forms a vicious cycle feeding on itself and makes it difficult for you to control.
making you feel that the whole world is against you, out to demolish all your plans, make you a failure in life, and destroy you completely. It saps your courage and energies by directing them towards an unnecessary fight against non-existent enemies. It makes you helpless and hopeless, inducing inaction where even a few simple but courageous baby steps could avert the impending dangers. In addition, it keeps you in constant and chronic stress, upsetting your hormonal balance, reducing the brain contents required for happiness, and, ultimately, destroying your immune system.
In due course, unchecked negative thinking forms into a habit and reduces your natural ability to think logically, reason effectively, and retain useful and happy memories. Negative thinking forms a vicious cycle feeding on itself and makes it difficult for you to control.
How to manage
Despite being aware of these dangers, these negative thoughts cannot be fully eliminated. Fortunately, they can be distanced and managed, resulting in their reduced impact. They are like weeds in a beautiful garden; they will inhibit the growth of positive thoughts and kill your self-confidence and self-esteem. Managing negative thoughts is both an art and a challenge. Below are some of the mechanisms of understanding, managing, and controlling negative thoughts:
•Just watch them pass by your thought process; they slowly fade away.
• Never fight them, but subdue their power by not allowing them to dominate you.
•If they do materialise, like the unusual coronavirus pandemic, then face them with
48 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021


Engage yourself in reading good books to keep a positive mental attitude
courage and determination, with all the mental resilience you can muster. Normally, facing any fear courageously will drive the fear away.
• When gloom and doom stare at you from all sides, look within and you will find a stream of calmness fully protected from the external world; cherish this experience of the inner world.
•Think of the good things that God has bestowed on you—healthy body, loving family and friends, financial comforts, sound mind, pleasant environment to live in, etc. In the same breath, accept your limitations, inadequacies, and adverse circumstances. Try to improve upon them and see how you can turn them into advantages.
• Without encouragement, negative thoughts
•
die a natural death; so, resist the habit of following through them and kill them.
Keep away from negative people as they are the greatest destroyers of self-confidence and esteem. They are highly contagious in spreading their gloomy and doomy ways of analysis and thinking. Stop arguing with such people and trying to convert them; it is futile. Just keep a distance from them and avoid them.
• Positive and negative emotions cannot occupy the mind at the same time; so always choose positive thinking and feeling about everything and everyone. You have that choice in all circumstances; choose right.
Be highly selective about what you watch on TV and your interaction in social groups
Awareness 49


like WhatsApp and Facebook as they are the worst carriers of gloomy stories and rumours. They breed negative thinking and lead to disappointments and depressive moods.
Know for sure that negative thinking, either about others or yourself, can never bring you a positive and peaceful life.
Positive thinkers think of solutions and negative thinkers think of problems.
Engage yourself in prayer, meditation, the chanting of slokas or mantras, reading books, listening to soothing music, etc.
Benefits of managing well
The consequences of banishing negative thoughts are manifold and largely beneficial. The antonym for negative thoughts is positive thoughts. They both cannot exist simultaneously, and the latter has the capacity of driving the former away. Totally unexpected and unplanned favourable developments will occur when negative thoughts are substituted with positive ones. Mind you, whether it is the people or the pandemic, they are still in the
external world. Do not allow them to intrude into the natural stream of calmness and peace of your inner world.
Gloom and depression, fear, and anxiety, and melancholy and misery might have spread their tentacles everywhere amidst feelings of pessimism and fatalistic thoughts. Leaving this negativity where it is, you can dive within yourself and find a stream of calmness and serenity fully protected from the external world, where none of the poisonous thoughts of the latter can penetrate and intrude without your will and invitation. The wild dance of negativity outside can be shut off if you determine not to let it inside you. Banishing negative thoughts can help you discover a fresh perspective on life and the human experience that is purely positive.
So take a solemn oath that you will never entertain negative thoughts about anything or anyone, even in times of intolerable situations of despair or disappointment. When you do so, everything will change in the mysterious schemes of God, and the future will have better days for us in its womb.
50 LifePositive | OCTOBER 2021
We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article. Mail us at [email protected]