POETIC PAUSES: Pause to Connect POETRY AND OTHER ART COLLECTIVELY CREATED BY THE HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE
POETIC PAUSES: Pause to Connect
Other publications by the Hummingbird Memory Cafe Family Book of Joy Brenda and Billy's Beautiful Balloon Ride Cafe Creativity Collection Children’s Reading List: Books About Dementia Collective Creativity Francine’s Fun Iridescence: A Resource Guide Mikey Franklin's Friendship Springer ‘Spirations The Hummingbird Herald Yanceyisms
HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE POETRY AND OTHER ART COLLECTIVELY CREATED BY THE HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE POETIC PAUSES: Pause to Connect
Published 2024 by Hummingbird Memory Cafe All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval without written permission from the author, except for the inclusion of brief quotations in a review. Poetry was collectively written during cafe engagements unless otherwise noted. Cover design and layout of the book by Nicolette McDermott-Ketchum. Images accessed from canva.com except when noted otherwise. Poetry | Inspiration | Reflection | Creativity | Community Poetic Pauses: Pause to Connect shares the collective experiences, emotions and memories of people living with and impacted by dementia. It is not meant to replace professional medical advice and counseling. Users of Poetic Pauses: Pause to Connect are encouraged to seek their own advice when deemed necessary. All involved with the creation of Poetic Pauses: Pause to Connect disclaim any liability arising from application of information included within. The contents of this book, including poetry and other artwork, is intended to inspire the artist in each of us to create in our own settings. Please adapt to the artist's situation, interests and abilities while using all items safely. Please contact the café if you have any questions about the content of this book.
Poetic Pauses: Pause to Connect is dedicated to all of us who are reimagining a better world where we all have access to what we need to thrive and find joy in our JOurneYs.
Foreword Take a moment to pause. Pause to remember the challenges we face. Pause to celebrate the opportunities we share and the chances we take to try something different. Pause to recognize our losses and acknowledge our individual and collective grief. Pause to take a deep breath and believe that we will go on and honor the strength and resiliency of each of us as we look toward new ways of doing things and engaging with each other. Poetry and other creative outlets provide opportunities for expressing ourselves on good days as well as challenging ones. The arts can connect us and allow us to begin a journey of healing. There is no right or wrong when we are creating poetry or other art. Constraints are removed when we express ourselves through the arts. The poems and other artwork contained within capture moments we have taken at our cafe either in person or virtually to pause and reflect on the themes of the cafe as we connected our voices. The Hummingbird Memory Cafe expresses gratitude for everyone who engaged in these creative experiences using words and various art media to create original individual and group works of art. There is an artist in all of us. We all have the capability to manifest our creative thoughts in poetry and other forms of self-expression. May you be inspired to pause and consider how you might utilize the arts to express your joys and your sorrows, challenges and successes. Nicolette McDermott-Ketchum, Facilitator Hummingbird Memory Cafe
CONTENTS SPOTLIGHT SILVER LININGS | 21 Where have cafe family poets found the joy in their JOurneYs? THE POEMS Why Connections Matter | 7 The Gift of You: A Hummingbird Speaks | 9 The Day That You Were Born | 11 Because of Kindness | 13 Kindness Shared | 15 Time to Love | 17 Today.Tomorrow. | 19 Silver Linings | 21 What Makes Life Pleasant? | 23 THE PROCESS There Is No One Way | 27 The Cafe Approach to Writing Poetry | 28 Adapting Our Process to a Virtual Format | 29 Take Your Own Poetic Pause | 30 Worksheet for Creating an Original Poem | 31 OTHER PROJECTS Collage: Working in Groups | 34 Kindness Rocks | 35 Using Technology to Create Online | 36 CREATIVITY RESOURCES | 39 TRENDS USING TECHNOLOGY TO CO-CREATE ONLINE | 36 The right equipment and technical connections provide a foundation for positive engagement with technology. THE HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE STORY | 2
POETIC PAUSES: Pause to Connect
Memory cafes originated in the Netherlands in the 1990's. The first cafe in the United States started in Santa Fe, New Mexico in 2008. There are now thousands of memory cafes throughout the world. Planning for the Hummingbird Memory Cafe in Farmington, New Mexico, began in 2019 with gatherings of various community members who had a personal and/or professional connection to dementia. Community members recognized that people with dementia and their carers could benefit from the social and creative connections that are provided at a memory cafe. Dr. Jytte Lokvig, founder of the memory cafes in the United States, provided training about improving our communication for people with dementia, as well as ideas for engaging in co-creativity at the cafe. Due to COVID restrictions, we pivoted to an online platform and had the pleasure of gathering with others throughout the country and around the world who are reimagining dementia and finding joy in their JOurneYs. The cafe currently functions as a repository for resources that support our JOurneys in living with dementia as a person diagnosed, a carer or other community members. The Hummingbird Memory Cafe Story 2 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
POSTMODERN PAINTING. Stella alternately paints in oil and watercolor A voluntary leadership approach allows the cafe to maintain its mission, values and vision without compromise. We are grateful to the individuals and organizations who provided space for training and gathering, as well as those who provided in-kind donations and donated their time to the cafe. We also share our appreciation for the volunteers who continued to engage via the virtual cafe format and continue to stay in touch via social media and email. Everyone who has been and continues to be involved with the cafe brings something special to our cafe family--your ideas, your sense of humor, your stories and more. Thank you to everyone involved with the cafe family. We are all so lucky to have each other, especially as the world around us is going through so many changes. elements of a cafe gathering the arts, laughter and social connection photo: Nicolette McDermott-Ketchum HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 3
Each man’s life touches so many other lives. I T ’ S A W O N D E R F U L L I F E
The Poems
6 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
why connections matter HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 7
8 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
You are special. One of a kind. There is no one else like you. We are grateful you are here. Be just you. Share your gifts, talents and love with others. Let no one hold you back. Not even yourself. Embrace the moment. Be joyful. Fly free. Your beauty radiates amongst all of us. Keep shining! The Gift of You: A Hummingbird Speaks Nicolette McDermott-Ketchum HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 9
10 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
On the day that you were born All the flowers were born. The gift of you was celebrated by your family With love and encouragement To follow your dreams. When your family celebrated birthdays Grandmas and Grandpas used to come For every child’s birthday. Sometimes it seemed like a lot of birthday parties But your family continued to celebrate them. One year you were disappointed as a child And then determined that you would always celebrate your own children’s birthdays. On your 21st birthday You received 21 silver dollars That are now in a safety deposit box Waiting to be given to a grandchild. When you first moved to Farmington You joined a neighbor’s birthday party of another culture And ate fried bread for the first time Listened to music and drums And watched a large outdoor fire. Your family sings “Las Mananitas” early in the morning You drink refreshing fruit water And smash the first bite of cake in each other’s face. You have always prepared a big meal with burnt sugar cake for others And now Your daughters make the cake for you as well. The Day That You Were Born HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 11
12 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
We are friends. Your smile brightens an otherwise dark day. Friends don’t isolate and provide a listening ear. I’ve been brought to happy tears. I can breathe. I am strong. I am blessed. I feel safe. I am not alone because you see me. We are here. There is hope. We move forward. Because of kindness I can face another day. BECAUSE OF KINDNESS HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 13
14 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
Looked out the window and it was snowing Joy seeing the neighbor shovel the snow Scraping Chiseling Sweeping Brushing Huffing Puffing Neighbor is there for us We are so thankful We can repay others by paying it forward and Reciprocate the kindness received Shoveling the walk and putting out trash cans Clanging Loading up the truck with recyclables for another Crushing cans Teaching children Exciting and joyful Baking pie Tart and fluffy Frying potatoes Crispy on the outside Talking to others who are alone Listening, laughing and having great fun Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Neighbors, friends, family. Kindness shared. Pass it on. Kindness Shared HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 15
16 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 17
18 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
Raining. Sunshine. Things to do. No pressure. Full of possibilities. Happy. Hopeful. I hope my memory is better tomorrow than today. Something. Puppy. Joy. Desserts spelled backwards=stressed. Ice cream eases anxiety. I was outside. We painted colors. Use all colors. New friends. Do it today. Don’t worry about tomorrow. Today. Tomorrow. HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 19
20 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
What is a silver lining? A silver lining is hope, love and laughter. Everything's going to be okay ever after. Look closely at the negative to find the positive. Someone comes along when you are feeling low. They may be a stranger or someone you know. Come out of the dark into the light. Happiness and rainbows will make it all right. We are silver linings when we say hello. It brings happiness and joy to make our day glow. Random acts of kindness make our day a little better. Wave and smile at each other and even write a letter. Silver Linings This poem was selected as one of the winners of the 2022 New Mexico Conference on Aging Poetry Contest! HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 21
22 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
Warm weather Sunshine Smile on my face Love in my heart Reconnecting with others W H A T M A K E S Y O U R L I F E P L E A S A N T ? W H A T M A K E S L I F E P L E A S A N T HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 23
The Process
26 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
What I love about poetry Is that there is no right or wrong There is no one way To write our song The letters may be TALL Or the letters may be small There may be a rhyme Or there may not The words may be solo Or the phrases may be l o n g There may be stanzas Or one l o n g song So it doesn't really matter How you get those words down Just write down your feelings Whether with a smile or frown There Is No One Way NICOLETTE MCDERMOTT-KETCHUM HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 27
1 C O N S I D E R A T H E M E . A theme can provide a springboard for poem ideas. THE CAFE APPROACH TO WRITING POETRY Creating poems collaboratively allows all cafe voices to be heard. 5 4 A R R A N G E W O R D S A N D I D E A S . The arrangement of your poem will depend on how you would like words and ideas to flow. For instance, will your poem rhyme or not? Will your poem be a listing of the words or ideas that were shared? Will your poem be arranged into stanzas? Again, no right or wrong. What title would capture the spirit of your poem? R E A D Y O U R P O E M . One person may choose to read the poem and/or the poem can be read aloud together. Celebrate the beauty of your creation! S H A R E Y O U R P O E M . Celebrate the beauty of your creation with others in your circle and beyond! 7 6 T I T L E P O E M I F Y O U L I K E . B R A I N S T O R M W O R D S A N D I D E A S R E L A T E D T O T H E T H E M E . There is no right or wrong in this process. What words or ideas come to mind when you consider the theme you have chosen? 2 C O N S I D E R R E L A T I O N S H I P S B E T W E E N S U G G E S T E D W O R D S A N D I D E A S . How are individual words and ideas related to each other? Are they similar or opposite, for example? 3 28 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
ADAPTING OUR PROCESS TO A VIRTUAL FORMAT The whiteboard function of Zoom was used to record and organize the poets' words in real time. We are creative. We sing. We play. We connect. Grateful for friendship. Creative Together: A Haiku HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 29
TAKE YOUR OWN POETIC PAUSE: Create an original poem. After reading this collection of poetry and reviewing our process for writing poems, what's on your heart to express through this form of writing? Use the worksheet on the next page to brainstorm your ideas. Contact the cafe if you would like to share your work. 30 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
2 661 1 C O N S I D E R R E L A T I O N S H I P S B E T W E E N S U G G E S T E D W O R D S A N D I D E A S . 3 A R R A N G E W O R D S A N D I D E A S . 4 1 T I T L E P O E M I F Y O U L I K E . 5 1 C O N S I D E R A T H E M E . R E A D Y O U R P O E M . B R A I N S T O R M W O R D S A N D I D E A S R E L A T E D T O T H E T H E M E . 2 S H A R E Y O U R P O E M . 7 Worksheet for Creating an Original Poem HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 31
Other Projects
C O L L A G E w o r k i n g i n g r o u p s Supplies magazines or other sources of pictures & words glue stick posterboard or other large space on which to glue pictures & words consider other objects to include in collage such as dried flowers/plants Adapt this project to the artist’s interests and abilities Tear pictures instead of using scissors to cut. Glue pictures on various surfaces--posterboard, paper plates, cardboard, cardstock, butcher paper--the potential is limitless! photos: Nicolette McDermott-Ketchum 34 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
KINDNESS ROCKS ACRYLIC PAINT ON SMOOTH ROCK Supplies Smooth rocks Acrylic paint Paint brush(es) Paint marker pen Multiple Options for Creating Your Rocks Paint the entire rock and let it dry before creating on top of the painted background. Write on the rock as it is. Add words and/or pictures that inspire you. A clear coating can be applied after the paint and marker have dried to seal the paint and add shine to the rock. photo: Nicolette McDermott-Ketchum HUMMINGBIRD MEMORY CAFE | 35
Google Jamboard Captures Thoughts in Pictures Based on conversation shared during the Connections Cafe What relationships or connections do you currently have in your life? Using Technology to Co-Create Online The right equipment and technical connections provide a foundation for positive engagement with technology. As with many other organizations, the Hummingbird Memory Cafe pivoted to on-line engagements during COVID-19. Initially, this came with many challenges, but the assets we had prior to the pandemic provided a foundation for embracing the opportunities that the technological changes offered. We kept the focus on the activity as much as possible and not the technology. Below is an example of how the cafe was able to utilize technology to create an artistic representation of a conversation we held at a cafe gathering. 36 | POETIC PAUSES: PAUSE TO CONNECT
Creativity Resources