HEAL 35

CLUB HEAL QUARTERLY NEWSLETTER
JANUARY - MARCH 2022

MANAGING STRESS AND
DEVELOPING RESILIENCE

JAN -MAR 2022

MANAGING STRESS AND

DEVELOPING RESILIENCE

President's Message 02
04
Manage the Stressors of 07
Life through Seilf-Care 09
By Aneez Fathima Farook,
Counsellor 12

A New Lease of Life
Interview with Asst.
Programme Executive
Aisha Said Khadeid

Tough Times Produce
Tough Cookies
Interview with Senior
Counsellor Balqis Abdul
Jabbar Maricar

Creative Corner:
By Faris Ridzuan

Page 01

JAN - MAR 2022

“Problems are not the problem; coping is the problem.”
– Virginia Satir

Stress is part of our everyday lives. It cannot be avoided. It is lifelong and
appears in various forms at various stages of our lives. Stress from
studies, work, relationships and financial woes are commonplace and if
excessive, may lead to a deterioration of our physical, emotional and
mental wellbeing.

How then do we cope with the stresses that come our way such that
they do not lead to major obstacles that hinder our ability to function?

How can each stressful episode in our lives lead to learning and growth?

As a child, each time I encountered a stressful episode, the adults
around me would tease me with the following comment - “character-
building exercise for you”. Looking back, although painful, those
episodes have in fact, by God’s grace and mercy, benefited me.

In this issue of HEAL, we learn of how people at Club HEAL have
weathered the storms of life and emerged stronger and more resilient.




“It should be noted that were it not for the trials and tribulations of
this world, a person could develop arrogance, self-admiration, a
pharaonic attitude and hardheartedness, which would lead to his
doom in this world and in the Hereafter.”
- Ibnul Qayyim




Dr Radiah Salim Page 02

Club HEAL Newsletter

JAN - MAR 2022

About Club HEAL

Club HEAL was formed in 2012 by a group of like-
minded individuals who have a strong passion in
helping people with mental illness and their family
members lead a fulfilling and stigma-free life.

A charity that promotes the healing and recovery
of people with mental health challenges by
inspiring Hope, Empowering lives, fostering
Acceptance and spreading Love, services
provided by Club HEAL include day rehabilitative
services, counselling, home visits, public
education, support groups and volunteer training.

Club HEAL is a registered Charitable Organisation
with an approved Institution of Public Character
(IPC) status. Club HEAL is a member of the
National Council of Social Service (NCSS) and a
part of the Community Mental Health Intervention
Teams (COMIT) and Community Resource
Engagement and Support Team (CREST)
programmes under the Ministry of Health (MOH).

Be a HEALing Friend. Join Us As Volunteers

As a member or a volunteer, you can
contribute in a variety of ways, from
assisting in Club HEAL events to
conducting rehabilitative activities!

We need people from all walks of life who
can contribute their time and skills to fulfill
our cause.

To become a member, please fill-up the
membership form available at our website
(under Resources section) and email it to
us at [email protected] or mail it to:
Club HEAL, Blk 254, Bukit Batok East Ave 4,
#01-229, Singapore 650254.

We look forward to hearing from you!

Club HEAL Newsletter Page 03

JAN - MAR 2022

By Aneez Fathima Mohamed Farook

Mental health is "a state of well-being in which the individual realizes his or her own
abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully,
and is able to contribute to his or her community.” – World Mental Health Organization

Mental health is on everyone’s lips now in the Covid-19 era and maintaining a healthy and
positive mindset is what we aim for. Mental illnesses are associated with distress and
difficulties in coping with the normal stressors of life. It is on the rise and, in Singapore, one
in seven people are affected by it at some point of their lives (Singapore Mental Health
Study 2016). A mental breakdown has great repercussions and takes psychiatric and
psychological treatment, personal endeavour and social support to overcome, and its
impact on society is far-ranging, in this pandemic.

Everyone experiences stress to some degree. The way we respond to stress, however,
makes a big difference to our overall well-being. Elevated levels of stress due to the
difficulties in coping with the normal stressors can lead to mental breakdown.

tress becomes problematic when stressors continue without relief, resulting in a feeling of
being overwhelmed and the inability to cope with mental or emotional pressure. Thus, it is
very important to have techniques to cope with the challenges of daily living and the
vulnerable moments or stages in our life.

Club HEAL Newsletter Page 04

JAN - MAR 2022

Eustress is good for you
There are different types of stress and not all are bad. Firstly, there is eustress or "good
stress". It is our positive response to the stressors we face in life. It motivates us, help us to
build our resilience, and drives us to perform well. Eustress produces positive feelings of
life satisfaction, excitement, contentment, purpose and meaning, and emotional well-
being. Therefore, stress is not always a bad thing. Examples of good stress include starting
on a new job, arranging a wedding, travelling for a holiday, and giving birth. These are
positive events and the jitters or anxiety that accompany them merely inject thrills into
these momentous occasions.

Acute stress is short-lived
Acute stress happens when an individual is subjected to an obstacle or threat which
produces a fight, flight, or freeze reaction. Most people undergo this occasionally in daily
life as when there is a misunderstanding with a co-worker, spouse, or neighbours; or you
miss a deadline; or you are stuck in a very bad traffic jam.
Acute stress is generally short-term and is easy to recover from. Repeated occurrences of
the same acute stressors, however, can lead to chronic stress.

Chronic stress is toxic
Another form of stress is chronic stress, which is toxic. It is a sense of constantly feeling
pressured and overwhelmed over a long period of time. It can be caused by everyday
pressures of family and work or triggered by a sudden and traumatic, unpleasant situation.
Such stress (and distress) may be due to – among other reasons – financial and health
issues, being subject to abuse or neglect, or breakups in relationships.

The major causes of stress in adults are work pressure, job loss, bereavement, relationship
challenges and financial problems. For children, the major causes of stress are social
pressure, bullying, exam stress and parental divorce. Chronic stress affects both the mind
and body. It produces both physical and psychological symptoms that can interfere with a
person's ability to function normally in their daily life.

Self-care to reduce stress
To combat stress, it is important to do self-care, i.e., taking conscious steps to promote
one’s own physical, mental and emotional health. Self-care includes doing everything
related to staying physically healthy — including maintaining hygiene, having good nutrition,
and seeking medical care when needed. In addition, they include other steps an individual
can take to manage the stressors in his or her life and take care of his or her own health
and well-being.

The World Health Organization defines self-care as “the ability of individuals, families, and
communities to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and to cope with illness
and disability with or without the support of a healthcare provider.”

Club HEAL Newsletter Page 05

JAN - MAR 2022

It is thus a personal and communal responsibility to ensure that we take steps to be at our
optimal physical, mental and emotional states.

Not being selfish
It means having good sleep, exercising and stretching, and showing forgiveness,
compassion, kindness and emotional maturity. It also means spending time alone, asking
for help when it is needed, forgiving yourself, and setting boundaries with others. Many
times, it involves taking a step back, putting yourself first and saying NO. Nevertheless, self-
care is not selfish.

You can manage stress before it becomes paralysing and leads to mental illness. Being
aware of your current level of stress is the first step to not succumb to negativity and
exhaustion. Catch your symptoms early through self-awareness and translate it into self-
care that gives plenty of healing spaces.

Below, are tips to get you well on the road to mood stability and ultimate recovery as you

learn to cope with the stressors in life. We can beat the blues and bounce back after a

stressful time if and only if we consciously take our health, peace and happiness as a goal

and priority.


Are you stressed or approaching a breaking point? Watch out for these signs as

they mean that you need to step-up your self-care, address your issues and

better manage your health:

Physical CHECKLIST Mental

Increased heart Difficulty
rate concentrating
Frequent ailments Decreased memory
like colds; Confusion
headaches; Difficulty making
muscle aches; or decisions
upset stomach, Bad dreams
including
diarrhoea, Behavioural Emotional
constipation, and
nausea Too little, too much, or Increased irritability,
High Blood disturbed sleep aggression or
Pressure Eating too much or too tearfulness
Weight gain or little Constant anxiety
loss Increased drinking, Having racing thoughts
Low energy smoking and drug use Losing interest in life
Biting your nails or picking
Club HEAL Newsletter at your skin
Constant restlessness

Page 06

JAN - MAR 2022

COPING SKILLS CHECKLIST
Here are some ways to cope with stress:

Balanced diet and good sleep habits
Exercise, especially walking around parks or by the beach
Maintaining social connections, and laughing with friends
and family
Getting a relaxing but inexpensive hobby like drawing and
colouring, gardening or dancing
Setting a priority list, and managing your time
Mindfulness practices, including worship and remembrance
of God, breathing exercises and practicing gratitude
Detoxification from social media
Seeking professional help

*Aneez Fathima is a counsellor at Club HEAL



By Yohanna Abdullah




In 1995, Aisha Bte Said Khadaeid, 62, faced the most painful period of her life. She was
separated from her two children for a year. “It was the biggest obstacle in my life. I
couldn’t do much when my husband abducted my sons, keeping them in Balikpapan,
Indonesia, where he lived. I couldn’t speak to them or know of their well-being and I was
warned that I would be arrested if went there. There was so much fear.”

He had flown her children on a private plane from Singapore on the pretext of taking them
for a holiday, but refused access to them until she fought for their custody in her divorce
and won.
Said the Assistant Programme Executive at Club HEAL’s Bukit Batok Rehab Centre, “It was
like going to ‘jihad’. I was a broken crystal, but not for long. It made me into a warrior as I
never gave up.”

The experience has made her accept challenges “with a pinch of salt, patience and
sincerity”. The forthright former kindergarten teacher is very resourceful and held many
different jobs including running a tour agency to support her children single-handedly.

Mental and spiritual challenges
“I had to keep my head up in the face of challenges and at that time, I could not talk to
people about my problems. I felt like there was an alien living inside me, as I was facing
severe spiritual challenges for a long time. I could not be calm and had a lot of negative
thoughts.”

Club HEAL Newsletter Page 07

JOANCT- M- DAERC22002221

Aisha was diagnosed with panic disorder only in 2021 although she had been seeing a
doctor since 2012. In 2012, she had received counselling and rehabilitation at Club HEAL for
about three months before she embarked on a new career in F&B. She recalls, “At the time,
I could not sleep or be on my own. I had unnecessary worries. I was not patient and calm. I
could not even smile – do all the positive things.”

Humps and bumps led to breakdown
“My condition probably was due to all the humps and the bumps in my life. I was
disconnected from Allah but I did not know why. I realised something was really wrong with
me when I saw and felt myself in flames, while praying in a Tahfiz school in 2018. I had a
mental breakdown that year.”

She adds, “For many years I could not even recite the Al-Fateha. Every time I tried, I felt like
there was a big stone weighing on my jaw. Everything that had to do with Allah was a
struggle.”
In fact, from 2013, for almost one and half years, almost daily, she literally saw her children
being wrapped in their death shrouds. However, she could not speak to anyone about the
strange visions.

Life-changing rituals
In March 2021, she received a few sessions of ‘ruqyah’ or Islamic spiritual cleansing. “Finally,
I felt I was free of all the weight of my burdens, and the visions and disturbances stopped. I
am now on the road to recovery,” she says with relief. Besides ruqyah, doing craftworks
also aids in her healing. A creative person who always keeps herself busy, she enjoys
crochet, beading, quilling, embroidery, smocking, flower arrangement and decorating the
house.

A new job, a new purpose
She shares some of these skills and her passion for life at Club HEAL Rehab, where she has
worked since April 2021. “I am ready to grow, bloom, empower and give love. I give my care
and love unconditionally. Work is a pleasure and I enjoy making our peers smile."

Aisha asserts that after her heavy trials, she
is now stronger to face any challenges in
her life. “My favourite quotes are ‘Never
give up’ and ‘We will survive’. Just continue
to breathe and smile!”

Aisha brings life into Rehab, ever Page 08
ready to help at the drop of a hat. She
spontaneously made this pirate paper
hat to entertain her peers.

Club HEAL Newsletter

JAN - MAR 2022

Tough times

produce

Tough Cookies


By Yohanna Abdullah
Tough times
are vital for one’s growth. For Balqis Abdul Jabbar

Maricar, a senior counsellor at Club HEAL, being a single
parent has spurred her to upgrade herself continuously. The
latest feather in her cap is a master’s degree in counselling
from Monash University.

I am so grateful to have Balqis, 53, faced her biggest obstacle at 32 when her marriage
gone through the tough faltered, and she agonised over the prospect of divorce. “I had
and challenging period. my worries about my children. People told me that divorce
Obstacles are a normal would cause them to suffer and develop psychological issues
and that made me anxious. How would my children’s lives turn
part of life. One can out? Would I be able to support them? What would be my first
manage them and be step? Day and night, I kept thinking, what’s next?”
better for having these
experiences, which is often Overcoming obstacles
the substance of great She added, “I am so grateful to have gone through the tough
and challenging period. Obstacles are a normal part of life.
memories and the One can manage them and be better for having these
motivation for rich experiences, which is often the substance of great memories
and the motivation for rich storytelling. We can adjust our
storytelling." mindset. When challenges are faced and conquered, there is a
wonderful sense of accomplishment. They helped me be the
person that I am today.”

Balqis derives her inner calm and resilience from Islam and
nurturing her relationship with the Creator. She also loves to
begin her day by reading motivational quotes. Three of her
favourite ones are:

“Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny.” - C.S. Lewis



“Sadness weakens the heart and diminishes determination and wanting to go forward”
– Ibn Al Qayyim.



“The 3 C’s of Life too: Choices, Chances, Changes. You must make a choice to take a chance,
or your life will never change!”

Club HEAL Newsletter Page 09

JAN - MAR 2022

Planning for success
She was determined to successfully raise her three children, and now she is a proud
grandmother of one. “I planned my journey before I left my marriage. I searched for
resources, asked around and discussed serious issues with my children. I knew that
education was the path that could lead me to becoming a stronger person and achieving a
successful life.”

While Balqis worked as a home-based private tutor for full time madrasah students, she
upgraded her Arabic and English proficiency through attending webinars with teachers
and scholars from America, Saudia Arabia and Egypt.

“I took my diploma in Islamic and Arabic Studies at Muhammadiyyah Islamic College in
2009. Then, I pursued my diploma in Psychology at MDIS in 2011. Next, I continued my
bachelor’s degree in Islamic studies and Arabic Literature in 2014 at Medina International
University. In that year, I also became a single mother and started my job at Club HEAL. I
then pursued my graduate diploma in counselling psychology at College Allied Educators
(CAE) in 2018. This year, I graduated with a master’s in counselling from Monash University.”

It has taken much perseverance to stay true to her ambitions. She cherishes a dream of
one day obtaining a doctorate, if she can get a scholarship to sustain her financially.

A labour of love
The hardworking extrovert is passionate about her job. “The most rewarding part of being
a counsellor is knowing that I have a part in positively affecting another human being,
giving hope when people feel hopeless. It is a true blessing when I know I have made a
difference in my client’s life,” she enthuses.

Naturally, she sometime gets overwhelmed at work, “When stressed, I will practice positive
self-talk. I deal with my emotions by reminding myself to be patient and telling myself the
stressors do not really matter. For example, if I hear negative comments in my head. I
immediately replace them with positive ones, such as, ‘I can do this,’ ‘I'm a great
friend/mother’, or ‘I'm good at my job’."

Chill time

To maintain a positive state of mind, Balqis regularly practices mindfulness, deep

breathing and relaxation techniques. She chills by watching Netflix, playing with her cat,

meeting friends, and travelling. She shared:

“My colleagues and family are my support
system. They tell me what I need to hear, not
what I want to hear, and they are there for
me in good and bad times. I have a beautiful
cat that is my inspiration too. Her name is
Zara. Without them, I have no idea where I
would be. I know that their love for me keeps
my head above the water.”

Club HEAL Newsletter Page 10

JAN - MAR 2022

Snapshots of Past Events

1.Zines Exhibition in conjunction with World Mental Health Day 2021: “Love Yourself”. Rehab participants
5
- Clementi Public Library, 1-31 Oct

2.Anugerah Mendaki 2021: “Raikan Ilmu”. Poetry recitation by Sumaiyah - Mendaki, 2 Oct

3.Mental ACT Symposium 2021: “Breaking stigma, Finding our balance! A Deep Dive into Racial Trauma -

The Minority Experience”. Panel discussion with Dr Radiah - Mental ACT, 2 Oct

4.‘Detik’ episode: “Social Media & Its Impact on Children/Youth Mental and Emotional Wellbeing”.

Interview with Counsellor Noraliza and OHV Alumnus ’Adlina - Suria Mediacorp, 6 Oct

5.3rd Asia Pacific Virtual Conference on Mental Health: “A Bridge for Service Users to be Service

Providers”. Sharing by Sumaiyah - Silver Ribbon Singapore, 7 Oct

6.Mental Health Talk: “Am I Being too Emotional?”. Counsellors Fauzy and Hakim - Kassim Mosque, 10

Oct

7.Mental Health Talk for Singapore Police Force (SPF). Executive Director Yang Chek - Agency of

Integrated Care (AIC), 12 Oct

8.“Sakit Yang Terselindung”. Talk by Ilham - Assyakirin Mosque, 16 Oct

9.Teachers’ Capacity Development Mental Wellness Training. Fauzy, Hakim, Fizah and Yang Chek -

Islamic Learning Hub and Management Office (ILHAM), 17 Oct and 28 Nov

10. Mental Health Awareness Talk. Dr Radiah – RedHat Group, 19 Oct

11.Dementia Awareness Talk for Bukit Batok East Dementia. Fazeeda, Juniahti and Nurulain -Friendly

Communities (DFC), AIC, 21 Oct

12.Mental Health Sharing. Senior Programme Coordinator Junainah and Programme Coordinator

Sumaiyah - Montfort Care, 22 Oct

13.Mendaki Youth Mentoring Office Community of Practice session. Talk by Hakim - Mendaki, 23 Oct

14.Mental ACT Symposium 2021: “Unmasking Experience (Bipolar Disorder and Schizophrenia)”. OHV

participants Izzah and Siddiq - Human Library, 23 Oct

15.Prophetic Parenting V. Talk by Fauzy - The Nun’s Production, 24 Oct

16.Mental Health Talk for Parents: “Stress Management”. Counsellor Aneez - Indian Muslim Social

Service Association (IMSSA), 24 Oct

17.Mental Health Talk for Secondary 1 and 2 students. Fauzy, Hakim and Yang Chek - IMAD Perdaus, 31

Oct

18.Mental Health Talk for Secondary 3 and 4 students. Fauzy and Hakim - IMAD Perdaus, 7 Nov

19.Dementia Awareness Workshop for Lion Befrienders. Fazeeda - AIC, 11 Nov

20. Mental Health Talk for Mujahidin Mosque Staff. Zainal - Mujahidin Mosque, 12 Nov

21. Mental Health Talk for Teenagers (Young Adult Boys). Hakim - IMSSA, 14 Nov

22.Mental Health Awareness Workshops for SPF, Community Police Unit. Yang Chek - AIC, 16 Nov

23. Mental Health Workshop for Central Narcotics Bureau. Yang Chek - AIC, 17 and 25 Nov

24. “Isu Mental - Satu Realiti atau Ilusi”. Talk by Fauzy - Al-Islah Mosque, 19 Nov

25. Mental Health Awareness Workshop for Lion Befrienders. Yang Chek - AIC, 19 Nov

26.Mental Health Talk for Primary 5 and 6 students. Counsellors Noraliza and Nurleen - IMAD Perdaus, 21

Nov

27. Dementia Awareness Workshop for DBS. Fazeeda - AIC, 24 Nov

28. Mental Health Talk for Adults. Fauzy, Hakim and Yang Chek - IMAD Perdaus, 26 Nov

29. Dementia Awareness Workshop for CERTIS. Fazeeda - AIC, 26 Nov

30. Mental Health Talk to Parents who are Zakat Recipients. CREST @ PRE - En-Naem Mosque, 27 Nov

Club HEAL Newsletter Page 11

JAN - MAR 2022

Creative Corner

I once was a broken flightless bird
Who tried to fly but was not heard
From storm to storm I weathered through
With weary heart and troubled rue
My mind was filled with blackened clouds
That rained on me, and spoke out loud
My shame, my fear, my darkened sorrow
As if there would never be tomorrow
But then with love from others near
Both so loved and oh so dear
My mind and heart arose afresh
And love mended me in spirit and flesh
I know that to love is more than a feeling
A skill to have that can send others reeling
Into an ocean full of love
That stretches till the stars above
The Divine overflowed with Love to make
All of creation and for Love's sake
And so with love I began to heal
And for others I began to feel
A love unbounded that quelled the storm
So that it faded in shape and form
And now if the voices or storms come near
Hold onto Love and spread Love, my dear
Faris Ridzuan

Club HCCElluuAbbLHHNEEAAewLL NNsleeewwttsselleertttteerr PagePa0gP2ea1g0e 12

Pledge Your Support JAN - MAR 2022

Help people with mental health
challenges receive the support they need.

HOW TO SUPPORT? For Bank Transfer & PayNow

Online at www.giving.sg/club-heal To request for tax deduction , please

Cheque (crossed & made payable to 'Club indicate your full name (as per your
HEAL'). Please indicate your NRIC at the
back of cheque for tax deduction. identification card) under “Bill Reference”.

Via Bank Transfer

OCBC Current Account: 641-372131-001
Thereafter email your full name, NRIC, FIN
Via PayNow
UEN no: T12SS0028K or or Passport No, contact number, transaction
scan QR Code using bank app
ref No., gift amount and date of donation to

[email protected]




For Cheque & GIRO

Please mail cheque or completed form to
254 Bukit Batok East Ave 4 #01-299
singapore 650254.



Please note that all donations made to Club

HEAL which is an IPC Status Charitable

Organisation are eligible to get 250% (2.5

times) Tax Deduction of the donation

amount made.

Patron in Chief: MANAGEMENT COMMITTEE
Madam Halimah Yacob
President: Members: Editorial Team
Patrons: Dr Radiah Salim
Mr Zaqy Mohamad Vice-President: Dr Bibi Jan Ayyub
Madam Rahayu Mahzam Ms Siti Hawa Sulaiman Ms Noorunnisa d/o Ibrahim Chief Editor
Hon Treasurer: Noorunnisa d/o Ibrahim Kutty
Hon Advisors: Mr Muhammad Fithri Daud Kutty
Dr Joseph Leong Jern-Yi Hon Asst Treasurer:
Dr Habeebul Rahman Ms Siti Aishah Jaafar Ms Deena Bajrai Editorial Team Members
Dr Norhisham Main Hon Secretary: Radiah Salim
Dr Sharifah Mariam Aljunied Ms Amarjit Kaur Ms Eunice Olsen Sumaiyah Mohamed
Mr Ram Dubey Hon Asst Secretary: Mr John Ho Yohanna Abdullah
Ms Nur Izzati Zainudin Ms Rohizan Talib
Hon Legal Counsel: Dr Sharifah Munirah Alhamid
Ms Roslina Baba
Ms Siti Noor Baizura Designer
Rahmatullah Yohanna Abdullah
Ms Tazrinah Hussein

Ms Fauziah Mohd Hussein

Contact Club HEAL Office: 6899 3463 (9am - 5pm weekdays) | Mailing Address: Blk 254 Bukit Batok East
Ave 4 #01-229 S(650254) | Email: [email protected] | Website: www.clubheal.org.sg