HOME IS FAR AWAY

HOME IS FAR AWAY.
Leow Sue Yu


Hi! Iʼm Sueyu.
A 20 year old Singaporean slaving away for the education system in university.
I started this project because I had so many stories to tell and so many ideas to share. I will not just be sharing my stories or ideas, but that of the people whom I love and of people whom I have met. Even if it was a stranger on the streets of Bangkok, Thailand.
This project was also the perfect excuse to get in touch with my loved ones and provided the opportunity for me to meet up with those I have not met in a while. It allowed me to hear stories, thoughts and beliefs I would not have heard otherwise.
-
As you read through the product of hours spent on Adobe Illustrator, I hope you remember what home feels like. Just like how I rediscovered mine.


What is ʻHomeʼ? A feeling? A place? A person?
-
It would be too dramatic to claim that I have never felt at home.
I have felt at home when the morning sunlight peaks through my curtains on a lazy saturday. But give it another hour and the light becomes too harsh and too unforgiving.
I have felt at home when my friends and I laugh over sweet nothings and reminisce about our days in Seoul over piping hot chicken ramen. But we eventually take our last mouth and wash the msg down with water.
I have felt at home when I stand on stage and feel the light hit my face. I cannot see the audience but I hear their cries, their laughters. But every show has its curtain calls.
-
Sometimes, home feels far away. Sometimes, home is too far away. Sometimes, home is far away.


4,669km away.
Seoul, South Korea // May 2018
“Hold my hand, Iʼm cold.” “We are in public.” “But Iʼm cold.”
He looked at his wife and sighed, “아이고 (aigo)” She held out her hand, waiting for it to be grabbed. And thatʼs exactly what he did.


1,381km away.
Bangkok, Thailand // July 2018
I chanced upon this street on the way back to the hotel. It was hidden behind two buildings and was only accesible through some sketchy alley. Perhaps it was not the wisest for me to walk down the alley. But I saw someone emerging from the street with the biggest, juiciest, crispiest golden fried chicken.
I found it immediately. The roadside cart was manned by a young Thai lady who had her hair up in a bun. I bought my chicken from her. I think I was charged the ʻtourist priceʼ.
But all that did not matter when I bit into the chicken. It practically melted in my mouth and oil was oozing with every bite. I could feel my artilieries begging me to stop. How could I?
Now I am not exaggerating but I think i found the purpose of Bangkokʼs existence in a roadside cart.
And yes, that chicken was THAT good.


Next Station:
EW26
Boon Lay
Our conversations were pointless but somehow familiar. We filled the air and space with laughter and memories from school. Questioning each otherʼs taste,
“Wah how is she cute sia!”
Demanding to know insider news we never knew before.
“They were together?”
“Ya bro omg. Everybody knew.”
Your eyes shifted as you fiddled with your fingers. You looked up and I could see the hesitation in your being.
“Just. Hypothetically speaking, do you think if the timing was right, something could have...”
You trailed off and fell silent. I raised my brows, waiting for you to finish your sentence even though I knew what you wanted to ask. My mind was scrambling to find the right words to form the right sentence. Instead, reckless words fell out of my mouth instead.
“Hahahaha that period was weird la! You legit had feelings for me meh?”
We walked around Jurong Point in silence.
I couldnʼt muster out an apology. An apology for hurting you in the past, treating your feelings so casually, for keeping you around.
The atmosphere changed. One heavy with the weight of words we never got to say and will never say because we missed the timing. I was thrown off by that question and had to wonder myself. Would anything have happened if the timing was right? Would things be different? I could hear your thoughts too. Wondering if we could have been together instead of me with him.
“ I thi- Aiya, itʼs too late to think about such things.”


EW25
Lakeside
To the 5 houses I have stayed in Lakeside, thank you for watching me grow.


HOME IS
Home Is
A cup of iced coffee in the morning light. When the pink and orange rays of sunlight
paint the whole house in soft shades and everyone has left for work.
Home is
Squabbling with family while we sit shoulder to shoulder.
But there’s a quiet assurance that at the end of the day, we'll still be together
.
Home is
fragrant home-cooked meals, steamed leftovers, and
packed dishes
.
Home is
where tears are shed in secret,
breakthroughs happen,
and where God meets me in my mess. Where I grew up in the Lord and
where He taught me
my future home is in heaven.


FAR AWAY.


home is here.