Building a Culture of Encouragement Relational Values At Work Session 1: What is Encouragement
© Relational Values Alliance 1 Introduction Part 1: Practicing Kindness: Giving is the Best Gift Of All Organizations benefit from actively fostering kindness. In a workplace where acts of kindness become the norm, the spillover effects can multiply fast. When people receive an act of kindness, they pay it back, research shows — and not just to the same person, but often to someone entirely new. This leads to a culture of generosity and kindness in an organization. (Don’t Underestimate the Power of Kindness at Work by Ovul Sezer, Kelly Nault, and Nadav Klein; Harvard Business Review; May 07, 2021) If we give kindness, we will receive kindness! Boomerang blessings are in store when we focus on giving rather than receiving. Watch the video below about kindness and the boomerang effect it has on those who give and receive kindness. Share Your Story—Have this conversation with a friend or co-worker. “What do you need more of at this point in your life? (support, appreciation, compassion, friendship, acceptance, attention, affection, etc.) Why?” Share your response to the questions above. “At this point in my life, I need more because .” (For example: “At this point in my life, I need more encouragement and compassion because I am facing my parents’ declining health.”) Here’s the Top Ten Relational Needs list with definitions in case you need them.
2 © Relational Values Alliance Good News: It’s a Chain Reaction Take Action: Be the Catalyst Remember, when relational needs are met, it sets in motion a powerful chain reaction. This week, look for opportunities to give—yes, give—to others the same thing you hope to receive (from the previous page). • Do you need acceptance? Look for opportunities to accept others who are feeling left out or excluded. Demonstrate kindness in this specific way. • Has your need for comfort been missed recently? Begin to give caring compassion to others who are hurting and demonstrate kindness. • Are you needing encouragement? Look for ways to encourage others who are weary or overwhelmed in their struggle. Show kindness in this way. • Do you need support? Offer your support to those who also find themselves in the midst of a struggle or are overwhelmed. Give kindness in this way. Whatever it is that you need—give it to others! REMEMBER: Our focus on giving does not disqualify us from receiving. Rather, it positions us to gratefully receive in other meaningful relationships. Still not convinced? Think about this way: When someone goes out of their way to help you, encourage you, or give you support, doesn’t it prompt such gratitude in you that you want to do the same? Your focus on giving, begins the chain reaction of gratitude and giving. Watch the video below that confirms this truth. • The Science of Kindness Share Your Story—Have a conversation with a co-worker or friend about your plans to meet the needs above and demonstrate kindness to others (Cultivate a plan based on giving to others what you need more of at this time). I know that my (friend, co-worker, etc.) ______ sometimes needs _____ so I plan to _____. For example: “I know that my neighbor struggles to mow his lawn and sometimes needs support. I plan to mow it for him. I’m looking forward to giving him support and kindness!” This week: Look for ways to demonstrate kindness to others. At the end of the week, spend some time reflecting on the gratitude you feel for being able to give in these ways. What blessings occurred because you began the chain reaction? Have a conversation with a colleague and share your moments of gratitude.
© Relational Values Alliance 3 What is Encouragement? Session 1 WHY is encouragement important? Your organization’s culture will benefit when employees’ goals and dreams are known and encouraged. • Encouragement is: Taking the time to urge someone on towards their goal; helping them become more determined, hopeful, or confident. Encouragement is helping someone to persevere. • The opposite of encouragement is discouragement. Discouragement can cause someone to lose their confidence or enthusiasm. • Encouragement sounds like: I know you can make it! Don’t give up! I believe in you. You’ve got this! • Watch this video. It helps you remember what encouragement looks like and sounds like. • Share Your Story—Remember a time when someone gave YOU encouragement. Remember a time when someone believed in you and urged you on towards a goal. Text this person and tell them why you are grateful. After you have messaged them, have a conversation with a co-worker or colleague about this memory.
4 © Relational Values Alliance Encouragement is not: Take Action: • Show You Care: Talk to another colleague about their need for encouragement. Learn what is important to them. Try these words: “I’m trying to learn more about how to show encouragement. When has someone encouraged you towards a goal? What did they say to cheer you on? How did it make you feel and how did it keep you going?” • Post a picture and text on social media where you encourage this person in the way they’ve described to you. • Encouragement is NOT saying words that cause someone to lose their confidence, motivation, or enthusiasm for a goal. • Remember a time when YOU’VE used discouraging words with others or said words that deflated the spirit of someone else. Here’s a video to remind you of what encouragement is NOT. The man gives inspiration and possibly some needed truth, but NOT encouragement. In contrast, the second video gives a perfect example of encouragement. • Share Your Story—Tell a co-worker or colleague about a time when you missed this need for someone else and how you would like to change. You might start with words like, “I am trying to become a more encouraging person. I remember when I said to someone instead of encouraging them or urging them on toward their goal of .”
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