Success In Life

success

in

life

Live the life you want in your thoughts and emotions.

By Howard Rose, Jr.

This book or parts thereof may not be reproduced in any form, stored in a retrieval system, or
transmitted in any form by any means - electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or otherwise -
without prior written permission of the publisher, except as provided by United States of America

copyright law.

Scripture quotations marked KJV are from the King James Version of the Bible.
Copyright © 2017 Howard Rose, Jr.
All rights reserved.
ISBN-10: 197846682X
ISBN-13: 978-1978466821

Cover Design by Howard Rose, Jr.

Media Inquiries, Booking, Permission of Quotation Requests:

RED Ink Publishing
454 Las Gallinas Ave, Suite 1002, San Rafael, CA 94903-3618

[email protected]
www.howardrosejr.com

While the author has made every effort to provide accurate telephone numbers and internet addresses
at the time of publication, neither the publisher nor the author assumes any responsibility for errors

or for changes that occur after publication.

DEDICATION

I dedicate this book to my lovely and adoring Wife, Patience Lavon. The level of success I
have achieved in my life thus far just in my writing I attribute to my life with you. you have

been an inspiration beyond compare and for that I love you greatly.



CONTENTS

Acknowledgments i

1 What Are Thoughts? 1

2 You Are What You Think 8

3 A Broken Mind - A Theory On Mental Disease 12

4 The Methodology Of Thought Process 19

5 (My Theory On) The Link Between Negative Emotions And Negative Thoughts 25

6 Your Thoughts Are Alive 29

7 The Affect Your Past Has On Your Future 36

8 You Have A Right To Your Feelings 41

9 Your Feelings Aren’t The Boss Of You 45

10 God Feels Negative Emotions 49

11 The Sum Total of Our Emotions 54

12 What Our Feelings Mean To Us 56

13 Sometimes Our Feelings Lie 59

14 Struggling With Feelings 61

15 Gaining A Handle On Things 63

16 Feelings And Their Validity 66

17 The War In Your Members 69

18 Having Perseverance When You Want To Give Up 73

19 You Are In Control 77

20 The Difference Between Reliving and Referencing Memories 80

About The Author 84





ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

To all of you who believed in me even when my life didn’t look like much but you chose to
see beyond where I was (physically) in my life, you spoke words of encouragement into and
over my life, and you wouldn’t let me settle for anything less than greatness, I salute you and

thank each and every one of you.

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1 WHAT ARE THOUGHTS?

As of recent, I have become quite intrigued and fascinated with that of thoughts and
the brain, how it functions and operates, how everything we do ties in to the brain
and our thought life. Ironically, I have always said that the brain is the processing
center for all of the functionality of the human body. But what I have also come to
understand is that our thought life greatly affects our brain and its health and
activity. But this chapter - as well as this entire book - is purposed to focus on
everything but the brain. Hence, I have also come to the conclusion and belief that
our thought life does not exist in our brain - it exists in our hearts.

As a life coach (or life empowerment specialist as I like to call myself), I have had
many conversations with individuals talking to them about their thought life and
how to improve it. I’m constantly offering suggestions, advice, recommendations,
etc., on what insight I gain from the heart of our talks. As I talk to people, many
times I am also receiving relevant revelation at the time when the conversations are
taking place.

Dealing with the part of our lives that has to do with thought on a daily basis
continues to intrigue me and it seems the more I talk about thoughts and what they
truly are, the more the meaning is defined for me.

Aside from the dictionary definition of the word thought, I have ascertained at
least two additional definitions that I would (unofficially) add to the list.

If I were to give my own dissertation on what thoughts are, the following would
be my submission:

What Are Thoughts?
Thoughts are the substance of all deductive reasoning. It is the realm where multiple options,
scenarios, and the like are whittled down to one conclusive and concrete explanation and where
our actions are derived from.

Thoughts are a collective of sound and light, words and images that are catalogued and stored for
future use. Our actions emanate from these vast catalogs and are based entirely on our present
belief system which is in turn connected directly to our thoughts. So, in more than theory, our
thoughts also dictate our present belief system.

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Thoughts are directly connected to our emotions. They provide the images, sounds, colors, shapes,
and the like, that our emotions take their shape from. There is not one emotion that is not
connected to a single thought or group of thoughts.

Here is the dictionary definition of what thoughts are:

1. The product of mental activity; that which one thinks.
2. A single act or product of thinking; idea or notion.
3. The act or process of thinking; mental activity.
4. The capacity or faculty of thinking, reasoning, imagining, etc.
5. A consideration or reflection.
6. Meditation, contemplation, or recollection.
7. Intention, design, or purpose, especially a half-formed or imperfect intention.

So we see here with the definition of what thoughts are that it takes mental activity,
thinking, reasoning, and imagining. All of these things have everything to do with your
thoughts.

I believe it is grossly important to highlight how important our thought life is and
how important it is to maintain a healthy one. From the company we keep to the
shows we watch on TV to the music and content we subject ourselves to, everything
we are exposed to directly affects our thought life and our actions and behavior is a
direct result of what we think about. Everything we do emanates from our thought
life and what we think about.

For example, when you woke up this morning, you had to put thought into what
you were going to wear, what you were going to eat, the route you decided to take to
work or to the grocery store, etc. All of the correspondence you send out on a daily
basis, whether it be e-mail, text or a simple phone conversation, at the root of it all it
takes thought process.

I often say that who we are and where we are in life is a direct result of how we
think. Your thoughts affect everything you do in life. This is why it is important to
maintain as healthy a thought life as possible. It is as equally important to have the
right tools in maintaining a healthy thought life because without the right tools it
leaves you at a loss and without the means to effectively navigate through life, make
decisions, have healthy relationships, and the list goes on.

Here are a couple of tenets and rules of thumb I live by as it relates to our
thoughts:

1. When we were growing up, we were always told to think but were never
taught how.

2. We have to develop the skill of thought processing.
3. Our thoughts are connected directly to our emotions, which are in turn

connected directly to our behavior.
4. For every behavior a person exhibits there is a corresponding emotion or

group of emotions, and for every emotion there is a corresponding
thought or group of thoughts.

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5. If you change the thought process of an individual, you in turn change
the emotional output and hence the behavior.

In going to school, thought process is not something where the how-to is taught
much. Instead, we are given information. In Math we are shown how to perform
complex equations and problems and given the tools on how to solve them. In
English, we are shown proper grammar and sentence structure. But in all of our
learning, we are not taught how to think and process through our lives and how to
practically handle life’s events and other people’s thoughts and emotions.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not blaming the school system for not teaching us how
to think and process through our thoughts. I don’t think it’s the sole responsibility
of the school system to do that. However, I do believe we need the correlated effort
of the school system to bring about maximized results in developing the skill of
thought processing.

Knowing what thoughts are in this day and age is important. With us living in the
age of such a vast abundance of accessible information has greatly impacted our
thoughts and what we think about from day to day. And knowing how to manage
our thoughts seems to be less and less important.

I did not get much into the scientific side of how the brain works as it relates to
our thoughts but I feel it has great relevance and needs to be addressed without
going too deep into detail. The media we expose ourselves to has a drastic affect on
how we think, many times without even knowing it. This is also why it is so
important that we monitor what our children watch on TV more closely.

Major corporations have spent upwards of billions of dollars on how to influence
us in the one area that we often leave unguarded and heavily discounted - our
thought life. It is amazing to me that many of them have spent so much time and
money on influencing people to buy their products but so little of it developing the
core of their business model to make a better corporation - their staff (the people).

If corporations understand the importance of influencing a person to buy their
products by swaying their thoughts, how much more important is it that we arm
ourselves and develop our thought processing skills to better handle life and not just
in buying a product or service?

Being that our thoughts have everything to do with who are as a whole person, it
behooves us to take the initiative in enhancing our character and personality by
developing our thought life. Making a healthier thought life means a more fruitful
and productive life, a life in which you will accomplish more.

It is my belief that without a healthy methodology of thought processing skill a
person is left to many alternatives of demise that can further lead to physical
ailments. These ailments many times, I believe, lead many an individual to the realm
of poor mental health. This is where we have some of the different illnesses we
attend to in some people where they deal with depression, bipolarism, anxiety, and
other mental diseases.

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Giving individuals the right tools they need to properly process through their
thoughts gives them an advantage and arms them with information that can bring
about a much clearer understanding of what thoughts are and what thought
processing is.

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2 YOU ARE WHAT YOU THINK

It is quite evident to me now more than ever that we are what we think about. This
is proven by all of the activities we see manifest on a daily basis. From the smallest
act of kindness to the newsflash of a terrorist bombing, these things are manifested
results of what was in the mind of an individual or individuals.

I remember a quote that quite a few motivational speakers use:

Whether you think you can or can’t, either way, you’re right.

In other words, the power you possess in your thinking alone and what you
determine in your own mind you can do or not do is your absolute truth that you
live by everyday.

If you think that you are an absolute success and that you are completely
unstoppable, then guess what? That is what and who you are! If you think that you
are good for nothing and you are a loser and there is no hope for you in the world
then that has become your ultimate reality and belief system and that is how you will
live your life.

You can tell a lot about a person and how they think by simply looking at how
they live their lives. Look at and observe what they wear, how they talk, where they
are in their lives and the direction they’re headed.

Albeit this is a for the most part analysis, you cannot simply judge the sum total and
entirety of an individual’s life by where they are as a whole. Life happens, things
happen and as always a person has to learn their own life lessons. So, we truly do fall
down at times but we can get back up again.

There are so many things that bring about an influence on the way we think and
see ourselves. This is why I am a huge proponent of being as mindful as possible as
it relates to your thought life.

I cannot tell you how many times I have been going throughout my day and will
find myself in a certain train of thought only to have the Holy Spirit to ask me,
“Where are your thoughts? Why are you here? Why are you thinking about that?”

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Monitoring my thoughts is something that has become a huge part of my life. It
is something that you must do as well. You must understand that you have full
autonomy over your thoughts and your thought life. No one can force you to think a
certain way; they can only provide influence, whether great or small.

I have a live event that I do for Success Thoughts called Success Thoughts LIVE! In
that event, I take a few minutes to talk to my audience and one of the things I say to
them is that where you are in your life right now has everything to do with how you
think. That’s a pretty big statement in my opinion and it’s certainly an eye opener.

When you make a statement like that to a group of people you stir something up
in the atmosphere. You stir up the hearts and minds of the individuals that are
before you. You bring about what my Wife and I call a conscious interrupt.

A conscious interrupt is an event that invades your life unannounced and completely
breaks your normal train of thought. It brings along with it a new ideal, something
that you may not have previously thought about before. A positive one will bring
with it a new level of absolute truth, trumping the one you presently cling to.

So to say to a gathered group of individuals who think they’re pretty much ok
with where they are in their lives that they’re where they are in life because of how
they think can say a lot to them. You get them to thinking, “Ok, what did I do to get
myself to where I am?”

A statement like this begs the questions, “How did I get here? What am I doing here?
Why am I here?” This question is purely designed for one purpose and one purpose
only: To make you further analyze your own thought process.

I have come to the realization that many people think the way they do and have
gotten into a normal routine of thinking that often times stays the way it is until it is
challenged. Until your current state of thought processes are challenged you will not
ascend to higher levels of thought and a better way of living.

You have to understand and realize that you have the power to change the way
you think. No one can change it for you. No one can force you to think a certain
way. Remember, they can only provide influence. If you don’t like what you see in the
mirror every day, you have a choice to make: either change your thought process or
don’t change it; it’s just that simple.

So, if you want to change something about your life the very first thing you
absolutely must change is your thought process. When you change your thought
process, what you are results from what you have settled in your mind and what you
think about.

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3 A BROKEN MIND (A THEORY ON MENTAL DISEASE)

As of yet, I have no professional credentials that speak to anything that I have stated
or may say regarding the brain, neuropsychological concepts, etc. My theories come
from life experience and what the Holy Spirit has revealed to me. I intend to receive
some form of credentialing at some point and am working my way in that direction.
But, in my most humble opinion, there is nothing that can beat being led and taught
by the Holy Spirit Who knows all things and is connected to the very source of life,
God The Father.

I also want to make it abundantly clear that there is no scientific theory, study, or
anything else that can take the place of God The Father. He is the creator of all
things scientific as well as the human body, its anatomy and the fullness of its
makeup.

Although we thank God for science and all of our wonderful scientists who have
gone the lengths of doing studies and providing information us, God still owns all
licenses in knowing all things about us and how we are made simply because He
made us!

I have a theory as to why we have people that are in a situation of dealing with
some type of mental disease or defect. When I say this, I’m referring to those who
may be dealing with bipolarism, schizophrenia, anxiety and all other related mental
disorders.

I am not referring to those who may have been born with some type of mental
defect whereby they are mentally handicapped. I believe those who may be dealing
with one of the mental diseases I named above are dealing with them for one simple
reason: they do not possess the right tools, skills and knowledge to be able to
overcome those (mental) diseases.

I am a firm believer that in order to do a job well you have to have the right tools.
If you are a carpenter, you cannot build a house with a metronome. Likewise, if you
are a musician - a drummer perhaps - you cannot make music with a T-square and
triangle (unless you’re a very skilled drummer, but I digress…)

So what I am saying is that in order to properly process through your thoughts
you need tools, skills, know how, etc. It’s interesting to me that we have schools that

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teach us how to do everything under the sun but there aren’t any that teach you how
to properly think and process through your thoughts!

You can go to school and learn how to be a psychiatrist. You can get all of the
training on how the mind and the brain works, you can understand all of the fancy
terms, you can know much about the subject matter but how much good does it do
if you’re not really teaching people how to think?

Here’s part of the problem. When we were growing up, we were always told to
think and that we better use our heads. I even remember a former supervisor that
used to tell me, “Howard, you need to use your head for more than a hat rack!” (I just
thought that was so funny!) But it speaks to my point. She was telling me to think
but not taking the time to show me how.

We have all had that said to us at one time or another. We have all been told to
think. How many of us were really and truly taught how to think and properly
process through every situation that happened to us in our lives? How many of us
were taught that when we were hurt by someone we knew and loved how to handle
that situation? I think that has been the case for most of us. Very few have been
fortunate to have had that privilege and opportunity given to them.

Here’s another point to consider. When most of us were growing up, we were
always told to think so therefore we did but at a very high cost. What do I mean at a
very high cost?

If you were not taught how to think and properly process through your thoughts,
you were left to your own devices on how you did that. If no one was there walking
you through step by step how to handle each and every scenario that happened to
you in your life, you actually began to formulate and put together your own
methodology of thought process. You did this while at the same time you were
formulating your belief system. Both of these were heavily influenced by your
environment and all of its surroundings.

So now you have an interesting situation on your hands without even realizing it.
Oh yes, you went to school and they taught you Math, English, Science, Technology
and the like but all of those things that were taught to you were fundamental
mechanics on how those things are supposed to be done. Furthermore, it only made
sense to you if it was already a part of your DNA and makeup that you would have
understood and excelled at those things. (You would have excelled only in the things
that had everything to do with your purpose. That’s another story…)

Now while your belief system and thought process are being developed, they are
all rounded off by the immediate influence of everyone around you - friends, family,
teachers, community leaders, neighborhood residents, etc. All of these people are
shaping the way you think and process through your thoughts.

Another tenet of your thought process being formulated has everything to do
with what did and did not agree with you. In other words, you weeded out the things
that you identified with and what felt good and what made sense to you. Everything
else was discarded. So now by the time you have reached your mid to latter part of

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your teenage years your thought process has now pretty much been
(developmentally) cemented in your mind and how you see yourself and the world
around you is now in full operation.

In those formative years, if you faced anything traumatizing and you did not
know how to properly handle that situation, it now stays with you and affects your
thinking and how you handle every person, every relationship, every job, every
school, everything in your life. This also adds to your methodology of thought
processing.

If your skill set in handling trauma was low, then not only will it show in your life
but it will affect everything you see and do until something comes along to help you
change it. If your skill set was high, then you were more than likely able to overcome
whatever happened to you and you continued to move forward and excel in your
life. Also remember this key point: all of this is based on you putting together your
own methodology of thought process and your skill in handling the world around
you.

In the cases of those who had a low skill set, this is very much what has led to the
mental diseases that arose out of those hurtful situations. Because an individual does
not possess the necessary skills and knowledge to help them overcome the trauma
that happened to them, they failed in being able to successfully manage those events
in their mind and thoughts. And if you cannot conquer a situation in your thoughts first,
you cannot conquer it in reality.

Michael Jordan will always hold a place in my heart for being the best basketball
player ever. I have included him in my writings several times that I can recall and my
story is still the same. I remember a story of an interview that he did about how he
was able to make many of the awkward shots he made and his answer was so simple
but yet so profound. He said, “I see it in my mind first before I do it.” That is what made
Michael Jordan the excellent player (in skill) that he was. He was able to see himself
doing something before he did it.

People that deal with mental disease are not able to see themselves in a positive
light. They find it difficult to conquer whatever trauma has befallen them. It is
obvious that they have difficulty in the realm of thought process because of the state
of mind they presently walk in and their inability to cope with and positively and
effectively deal with the trauma that they went through.

Sadly enough, this can go on for years until something or someone comes along
with a conscious interrupt. To speak to this case and point, isn’t it interesting no
matter how many drugs a person is prescribed, none of them can get rid of the
problem because it is not a physical problem but a mental and psychological one.
Drugs can alter the mental state of a person only by way of chemical alteration. They
cannot fix the thoughts of a person. That is something that the person has to fix
themselves.

When a person is armed with the right information, tools, and skills, I believe
they have the power to overcome any mental trauma that they have gone through.
But that person has to apply the (new) information they are given and only then will

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they experience positive results and success in life.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Howard Rose, Jr. is a profound pastor, a prolific motivational speaker, an
experienced entrepreneur, a dynamic life empowerment specialist, and a published
author. Having been an entrepreneur for almost two decades, Howard has become
well-rounded and experienced in several areas of business including the field of IT,
professional website design and development, hosting and maintenance, graphic
design, and business technology. Howard has maintained steady business through
great client relations. Success Thoughts, a prodigy in and of itself, was started in
2001. It is a ministry and motivational speaking entity that centers greatly around
self-inspired quotes that has helped him through very tumultuous times in his life.
Howard has a great passion for helping others realize that success and greatness
begins in themselves first, starting in the mind. His heartfelt regard for people
motivates him to help every person he comes in contact with, pushing and
propelling them towards their destiny. His unique approach to dealing with life
issues, coupled with his great love for people, is helping many an individual realize
success and greatness from within and helping them change their lives one thought
at a time.

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